February 25, 2025 • 20 mins
Unlock the secrets to a more empowered and less stressful divorce with guest, Kelly Krupinski, a seasoned family law attorney who brings her wealth of experience to our discussion. Together, Kelly and host Cary Jacobson, attorney and mediator, uncover why having a specialist in family law can make all the difference, offering creative solutions to steering clear of court battles. Listen now to gain practical tools that can turn this challenging life transition into a more manageable experience.
Visit jacobsonworkshop.com to learn more.
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Episode Transcript
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Intro/Close Speaker (00:02):
Welcome to Divorce Diaries, where Attorney
Cary Jacobson brings you realstories, hard truths and
practical advice on navigatingdivorce and family law.
Whether you're going through it, considering it or just curious
, this is your place for clarity, confidence and resilience.
Cary Jacobson (00:24):
Welcome to Divorce Diaries
the Trenches.
I'm your host, Cary Jacobson.
On this podcast, we explore thechallenges of divorce and how
to navigate them with the expertadvice from professionals who
have seen it all.
Today, I'm excited to haveKelly Krupinski, a family law
attorney, with Jacobson FamilyLaw.
Kelly is experienced insettlement agreement negotiation
(00:46):
, mediation and collaborativeforce.
Kelly is passionate abouthelping families resolve
conflicts amicably and she'shere to share her perspective on
how to avoid some of thosecommon mistakes during divorce
and to build a better future foreveryone involved.
So, Kelly, thanks so much forbeing here today.
Kelly Krupinski (01:05):
Thank you for having me.
Cary Jacobson (01:07):
Absolutely.
Can you start just by sharingwith our listeners a little bit
about your background, bothpersonally and in the law, and
how you became interested infamily law?
Kelly Krupinski (01:20):
Sure.
Well, I started law school kindof not really sure what I
wanted to do, you know, and so Igot involved with a clinic that
was a juvenile clinic.
It was based more on criminalaspects or you know, of the
juvenile.
But since then I've sort ofgone back and forth in my career
(01:43):
between juvenile matters andfamily law, which are of course
very similar.
So I started with legal aid andI did the representing children
in foster care there and thentransitioned to their family law
unit.
So I've sort of gone back andforth between the two and landed
(02:04):
here in family law right now.
Cary Jacobson (02:06):
Awesome.
Is there anything that you findmost effective for those
families who are navigatingdivorce?
Kelly Krupinski (02:18):
Yeah, I definitely think if you're going
through it, you want to findsomeone who's knowledgeable and
experienced in family law.
It's something that I thinksome people think oh you know, I
can just handle this on my own,but it really is nuanced and
something that it would bebeneficial to have, somebody who
really is aware of the law andkind of different solutions that
(02:41):
might be.
It's sometimes really prettycreative in the solutions that
you find to help out familiestry to get through the process
of divorce.
Cary Jacobson (02:52):
Yeah, I think many times I have seen over my
career where people just thinkyou know, going through a
divorce so any attorney can helpright.
Very much like the practice ofmedicine, where you have kind of
specialties, those you know youwant to have a cardiologist who
(03:13):
is working with you if you havea heart problem and not an
orthopedist.
So you really you want to havesomeone who works in family law
and not just a generalpractitioner or someone who
handles criminal matters or, youknow, personal injury matters,
because they are so differentand so specific.
So I think that that's justsomething for those listeners
(03:35):
out there be aware of, becausemany times there is really a
specialty and a focus on aparticular practice.
Kelly Krupinski (03:44):
I would definitely agree.
I think you know if anybody hada criminal problem they
probably would not want mearound.
So I think you know having theexperience with family law is
definitely beneficial.
It's something you see,something you do, and not that
it's common or that you don'ttake every case you know with
the specifics, but it's justdefinitely something to at least
(04:07):
be able to catch some of theissues that might arise.
Cary Jacobson (04:10):
Yeah, absolutely.
So.
Let's dive into the divorceprocess a little bit more.
What are some of those biggestmisconceptions that people have
when they're starting theprocess?
Is there something that you seeregularly?
Kelly Krupinski (04:27):
Yeah, I think when a lot of people kind of are
starting out, they think thatit has to be kind of court
driven, that they need to, youknow, file right away, like they
need to have the court kind ofmake these decisions on their
behalf, and I don't think thatthat's really necessary.
I think that in fact, it worksbetter the less the court is
(04:48):
involved.
Yes, the court is needed foractually doing the divorce, but
I just think it's not necessarythat you have them involved
right from the beginning.
Cary Jacobson (05:00):
Are there any particular reasons why someone
would want to file for thedivorce first before trying to
reach an agreement, instead oftrying to reach an agreement
first and then filing for thedivorce?
Kelly Krupinski (05:17):
I mean, I think in cases of like, maybe
emergencies and thingsespecially relating to children
that might be something you canlet the court involved
immediately because you mightneed that intervention if you
don't have a partner or spousewho's able to really work with
you, and there might besomething that's necessary to
get them involved.
But generally I think, and mostof the people I see, it's
(05:40):
definitely a case where theymight want to try to work it out
on their own not on their own,but might want to work it out
between themselves so that theycan figure out what works best
for their family.
Yeah, do you?
Cary Jacobson (05:52):
find that people are able to negotiate those
agreements with less stress thanif they are in the court system
.
Kelly Krupinski (06:05):
Absolutely.
I think, you know, by doing it,either through mediation or
settlement or however theychoose to do it, I think just
kind of them in the driver'sseat, I think is definitely
something where people feel morein control and able to kind of
navigate the process.
I think when the court'sinvolved, there might be
(06:26):
deadlines, other things they'renot really sure of and the next
steps they should take.
So I always think, if it'spossible, then I think it's
always better to try to do it onyour own think, if it possible,
then I think it's always betterto try to do it on your own.
Cary Jacobson (06:42):
Yeah, can you share with the listeners an
example of a case or a situationthat could have been prevented
if they had had some priorplanning, and how our listeners
could avoid being in a similarsituation?
Kelly Krupinski (07:00):
our listeners could avoid being in a similar
situation.
I think you know the big thingthat comes up for.
That is like prenuptials,especially lots of times in
second marriages, because theremight be other things that need
to be addressed, such as, youknow, other prior families,
children, that sort of thing.
I did have a case once wheresomeone had remarried and had
(07:22):
adult children and then had inthe second marriage without a
prenup.
Then he was kind of trying todeal with some of those issues
that maybe he really hadn't beenplanning on, and so I think
it's always a good idea to havesomebody kind of look out for
those things for you before youmight enter into that second
(07:43):
marriage.
Cary Jacobson (07:44):
Yeah, absolutely, I always think you know,
especially those situationswhere it's a second or
subsequent marriage a pre orpostnuptial agreement is
invaluable because it addressesthings like what assets both
people are bringing into themarriage, how they're going to
(08:04):
handle the division of assets ifsomething happens in this
relationship, but also,especially if you have adult
children, right, how, ifsomething, if one party dies,
how those children may inheritfrom the you know from each
other.
So it is absolutely crucial, inmy opinion, to have those pre
(08:29):
or post-nuptial agreements inthose situations and really can
prevent, prevent, you know,those situations where there's
fighting or disputes in thatsecond marriage or even the
first marriage.
You know, doing that prenuptialagreement the first time.
(08:50):
I think it's just one of thosetaboo subjects people are so
worried about bringing up.
Kelly Krupinski (08:57):
I think it's just one of those taboo subjects
people are so worried aboutbringing up.
But you know, it's definitelymaybe sometimes hard to bring it
up, but especially in a secondmarriage but also a first one,
(09:23):
it's a good way to kind ofdiscussions about how you plan
to handle finances handle assets, those sorts of things, it's
always always beneficial.
Cary Jacobson (09:27):
Yeah, I mean I can, at least in my experience.
Finances is one of the mainreasons people get divorced, not
to mention the communication.
But I don't think you know manycouples do have those
conversations about how they'regoing to handle finances in a
relationship and then you knowyou have couples with differing
(09:50):
values when it comes to money.
Right, you can have someone whois the spender and you have
someone who is the saver, andthen that can get really messy
when you're going through adivorce because it's like well,
why should we divide the assetsof this?
You know the person who's beensaving when the other person was
spending.
So a prenuptial agreement wouldaddress all of that.
Kelly Krupinski (10:13):
Absolutely.
Cary Jacobson (10:13):
Yeah, Do you find that you know when your clients
are dealing with high emotions,how do you help them with those
practical solutions whenhandling the emotional side of
the divorce process?
Kelly Krupinski (10:47):
although there are solutions and practical
solutions that you need to reach, I think you can't just ignore
that the emotions are really thedriving force behind everything
.
So definitely just kind ofacknowledging it and and not to
be their therapist, because thatyou know not the role of an
attorney, but but just to say,look, this is hard, this is you
know, this is something that youhave to deal with and you know,
(11:09):
if there are children involvedand you're trying to still
handle everything you need to dofor the children while handling
everything for the divorce,it's, of course, very hard to
manage those emotions.
So I just think, addressing it,really just making sure that
the client knows that you areaware of this and it's you know,
(11:31):
even if you are an attorney andthis is what you deal with all
the time, it is still reallyhard for the person that's
dealing with it.
Cary Jacobson (11:37):
Yeah.
Do you ever find situationswhere you may refer that
individual to either a therapistor a divorce coach?
Kelly Krupinski (11:46):
Absolutely yeah , because you know, if it's
something where that person isspending a lot of time just
focusing on that and then it'snot, it's kind of impairing
their ability to get to thosepractical solutions, then that
is certainly where anotherprofessional would be helpful.
Cary Jacobson (12:01):
Yeah, I think sometimes having that outlet of
working with a therapist or acoach can be really helpful for
people to discuss thoseemotional aspects so that they
can make the important decisionsrelated to their divorce.
Kelly Krupinski (12:19):
Yep.
Cary Jacobson (12:32):
So for any of our listeners who may be parents.
Kelly Krupinski (12:34):
Is there any advice that you would give them
to ensure that the divorceprocess minimizes the impact on
their kids?
I think which I think reallymost of the people kind of do
this anyway but just making surethat your focus is the children
you know and generally peopleeverybody is like, of course
that is my main goal, but Istill think sometimes, even if
that is your main goal to focuson the children these emotions
(12:54):
do come up and anger comes upabout you know the other person.
So, just trying to maybe focuson the children and even if you
might think something is better,try to consider other
possibilities or try to considercompromises to ensure that the
children are kept in theforefront of everything.
Cary Jacobson (13:13):
Yeah, are there any particular practical things
that you advise clients on asfar as how to focus on the kids
or to minimize that impact?
Kelly Krupinski (13:25):
or to minimize that impact.
I think there are lots of waysfor communication between the
parents that you can do, andsometimes we'll recommend like
an app where they might haveeverything in there so there's a
record of everything.
There's a lot of them out therethat do this.
That just kind of makes iteasier to look back and record
(13:46):
text messages.
Things can't be erased, thatsort of thing, so that way it
just makes it so everybody'saware of.
This is kind of how we're goingto move forward and I think
that's been helpful for a lot ofclients.
Cary Jacobson (13:58):
Yeah, the one I think I recommend the most and
I've seen the courts typicallyrecommend the most is Our Family
Wizard and we can add a link ofthat to in the show notes.
But you know many of them.
There are paid ones and thereare free ones.
It kind of depends on how youknow what features you need, but
a lot of them will have lots ofdifferent pieces in it.
(14:21):
I think Our Family Wizard hasan expense tracker and a
calendar like a shared calendar,and also, like you mentioned,
you know the communication toolbuilt in and God forbid if
anything happens in the futureand you end up back in court you
know you have access to all ofthose communications without
(14:41):
having to go back to textmessages and emails and that
sort of thing.
So, yeah, okay, Is there anyparticular, you know, piece of
advice or encouragement that youwould like to leave our
listeners with who are goingthrough and navigating this
divorce process?
Kelly Krupinski (15:04):
I just think, reminding people that it is a
process, just like anytransition.
It can sometimes beuncomfortable, sometimes be
uncomfortable, but I think atthe beginning a lot of people
are just so overwhelmed by thethought of thinking everything
needs to change, you know, andeverything's going to change, in
kind of the logistics of things.
But I think is, you know, yougo through it and you start to
(15:25):
recognize, well, this is whatthis aspect might look like and
how that might look in thefuture.
I think you start to realize,okay, there is a light at the
end of the tunnel and so youknow, just recognizing that,
that it is a transition and it'ssometimes bumpy and messy, but
it does eventually get to thepoint where you are in a much
(15:48):
better place.
Cary Jacobson (15:49):
Yeah, absolutely Related to that and recognizing
that it is a process and thatyou know, every situation is
somewhat different, but is therea typical timeline that you,
you know, see with your clientsas to how long that process
takes?
I know that people often ask,well, how long is this going to?
(16:12):
You know, take us to handle.
So is there something that youtypically see as far as what
that process looks like?
Kelly Krupinski (16:20):
I think it also depends on kind of what path
the client might choose.
So you know, if they'redeciding they want to kind of
work on this agreement beforefiling anything with the court,
we usually give about six monthstime to try to really do the
negotiation piece, you know backand forth and getting the
agreement completed and thenhopefully even within that time
(16:44):
have the divorce done throughthe courts.
Sometimes that can take alittle longer, depending on
assets, custody issues, whatevermight happen, but generally six
months to do the negotiation.
If they choose to do mediation,that we usually try to say, you
know maybe two to threesessions, depending on a two
(17:06):
hour sessions, depending on,again, the same kind of issues,
and then that's sort of based ontheir schedule and when they
can kind of fit that in.
But if the two of them areworking together and able to
really communicate, I would saywithin six months probably that
it can be completed.
Cary Jacobson (17:23):
Yeah, and for all of those listeners out there
that you know, six months isnothing when we're talking about
the alternative of court world.
Six months is nothing whenwe're talking about the
alternative of court world.
You know, and here in MarylandI would say, the fastest I have
seen, a divorce that has goneall the way through court
(17:44):
probably is more than a year,just because of scheduling and
all of the things that go intothat process.
I would say 12 to 18 months isprobably the most common.
So six months is relativelyshort when we're talking about a
timeframe.
We've seen them happen muchquicker than that, if you know,
(18:07):
if people are working together,but I would say six months is
pretty common for our clients.
Kelly Krupinski (18:14):
And I would say also that if they decide or are
unable to do it throughthemselves without using the
court, lots of times, the courtis going to order them to do
what we're trying to accomplishwithout getting the court
involved anyway, such asmediation or those sorts of
things.
So it's, I just think, way morebeneficial to try to get this
(18:38):
resolved, get many of the issuesresolved, before filing
anything with the court.
Cary Jacobson (18:43):
Absolutely.
Is there any last piece ofadvice that you would like to
share or, you know, share howlisteners can learn more about
you and what you do at JacobsonFamily Law.
Kelly Krupinski (18:57):
Sure, they can go to JacobsonFamilyLaw.
com that's our website and theycan schedule a consultation with
me, with you, and see the bestway that we can help them.
I think we also have a lot ofgreat resources on that website
with blogs, and that might giveinformation that you might have
more specific questions about.
Cary Jacobson (19:19):
Absolutely.
Thank you so much for beinghere and sharing your experience
and advice.
I appreciate it.
Kelly Krupinski (19:25):
Thank you so much.
Intro/Close Speaker (19:29):
Thanks for joining us today on this episode
of Divorce Diaries.
Thanks for joining us today onthis episode of Divorce Diaries.
Remember, every journey isunique, but you don't have to
navigate it alone.
No-transcript.
Welcome to Divorce Diaries, where Attorney
Cary Jacobson brings you realstories, hard truths and
practical advice on navigatingdivorce and family law.
Whether you're going through it, considering it or just curious
, this is your place for clarity, confidence and resilience.
Cary Jacobson (00:24):
Welcome to Divorce Diaries
the Trenches.
I'm your host, Cary Jacobson.
On this podcast, we explore thechallenges of divorce and how
to navigate them with the expertadvice from professionals who
have seen it all.
Today, I'm excited to haveKelly Krupinski, a family law
attorney, with Jacobson FamilyLaw.
Kelly is experienced insettlement agreement negotiation
(00:46):
, mediation and collaborativeforce.
Kelly is passionate abouthelping families resolve
conflicts amicably and she'shere to share her perspective on
how to avoid some of thosecommon mistakes during divorce
and to build a better future foreveryone involved.
So, Kelly, thanks so much forbeing here today.
Kelly Krupinski (01:05):
Thank you for having me.
Cary Jacobson (01:07):
Absolutely.
Can you start just by sharingwith our listeners a little bit
about your background, bothpersonally and in the law, and
how you became interested infamily law?
Kelly Krupinski (01:20):
Sure.
Well, I started law school kindof not really sure what I
wanted to do, you know, and so Igot involved with a clinic that
was a juvenile clinic.
It was based more on criminalaspects or you know, of the
juvenile.
But since then I've sort ofgone back and forth in my career
(01:43):
between juvenile matters andfamily law, which are of course
very similar.
So I started with legal aid andI did the representing children
in foster care there and thentransitioned to their family law
unit.
So I've sort of gone back andforth between the two and landed
(02:04):
here in family law right now.
Cary Jacobson (02:06):
Awesome.
Is there anything that you findmost effective for those
families who are navigatingdivorce?
Kelly Krupinski (02:18):
Yeah, I definitely think if you're going
through it, you want to findsomeone who's knowledgeable and
experienced in family law.
It's something that I thinksome people think oh you know, I
can just handle this on my own,but it really is nuanced and
something that it would bebeneficial to have, somebody who
really is aware of the law andkind of different solutions that
(02:41):
might be.
It's sometimes really prettycreative in the solutions that
you find to help out familiestry to get through the process
of divorce.
Cary Jacobson (02:52):
Yeah, I think many times I have seen over my
career where people just thinkyou know, going through a
divorce so any attorney can helpright.
Very much like the practice ofmedicine, where you have kind of
specialties, those you know youwant to have a cardiologist who
(03:13):
is working with you if you havea heart problem and not an
orthopedist.
So you really you want to havesomeone who works in family law
and not just a generalpractitioner or someone who
handles criminal matters or, youknow, personal injury matters,
because they are so differentand so specific.
So I think that that's justsomething for those listeners
(03:35):
out there be aware of, becausemany times there is really a
specialty and a focus on aparticular practice.
Kelly Krupinski (03:44):
I would definitely agree.
I think you know if anybody hada criminal problem they
probably would not want mearound.
So I think you know having theexperience with family law is
definitely beneficial.
It's something you see,something you do, and not that
it's common or that you don'ttake every case you know with
the specifics, but it's justdefinitely something to at least
(04:07):
be able to catch some of theissues that might arise.
Cary Jacobson (04:10):
Yeah, absolutely.
So.
Let's dive into the divorceprocess a little bit more.
What are some of those biggestmisconceptions that people have
when they're starting theprocess?
Is there something that you seeregularly?
Kelly Krupinski (04:27):
Yeah, I think when a lot of people kind of are
starting out, they think thatit has to be kind of court
driven, that they need to, youknow, file right away, like they
need to have the court kind ofmake these decisions on their
behalf, and I don't think thatthat's really necessary.
I think that in fact, it worksbetter the less the court is
(04:48):
involved.
Yes, the court is needed foractually doing the divorce, but
I just think it's not necessarythat you have them involved
right from the beginning.
Cary Jacobson (05:00):
Are there any particular reasons why someone
would want to file for thedivorce first before trying to
reach an agreement, instead oftrying to reach an agreement
first and then filing for thedivorce?
Kelly Krupinski (05:17):
I mean, I think in cases of like, maybe
emergencies and thingsespecially relating to children
that might be something you canlet the court involved
immediately because you mightneed that intervention if you
don't have a partner or spousewho's able to really work with
you, and there might besomething that's necessary to
get them involved.
But generally I think, and mostof the people I see, it's
(05:40):
definitely a case where theymight want to try to work it out
on their own not on their own,but might want to work it out
between themselves so that theycan figure out what works best
for their family.
Yeah, do you?
Cary Jacobson (05:52):
find that people are able to negotiate those
agreements with less stress thanif they are in the court system
.
Kelly Krupinski (06:05):
Absolutely.
I think, you know, by doing it,either through mediation or
settlement or however theychoose to do it, I think just
kind of them in the driver'sseat, I think is definitely
something where people feel morein control and able to kind of
navigate the process.
I think when the court'sinvolved, there might be
(06:26):
deadlines, other things they'renot really sure of and the next
steps they should take.
So I always think, if it'spossible, then I think it's
always better to try to do it onyour own think, if it possible,
then I think it's always betterto try to do it on your own.
Cary Jacobson (06:42):
Yeah, can you share with the listeners an
example of a case or a situationthat could have been prevented
if they had had some priorplanning, and how our listeners
could avoid being in a similarsituation?
Kelly Krupinski (07:00):
our listeners could avoid being in a similar
situation.
I think you know the big thingthat comes up for.
That is like prenuptials,especially lots of times in
second marriages, because theremight be other things that need
to be addressed, such as, youknow, other prior families,
children, that sort of thing.
I did have a case once wheresomeone had remarried and had
(07:22):
adult children and then had inthe second marriage without a
prenup.
Then he was kind of trying todeal with some of those issues
that maybe he really hadn't beenplanning on, and so I think
it's always a good idea to havesomebody kind of look out for
those things for you before youmight enter into that second
(07:43):
marriage.
Cary Jacobson (07:44):
Yeah, absolutely, I always think you know,
especially those situationswhere it's a second or
subsequent marriage a pre orpostnuptial agreement is
invaluable because it addressesthings like what assets both
people are bringing into themarriage, how they're going to
(08:04):
handle the division of assets ifsomething happens in this
relationship, but also,especially if you have adult
children, right, how, ifsomething, if one party dies,
how those children may inheritfrom the you know from each
other.
So it is absolutely crucial, inmy opinion, to have those pre
(08:29):
or post-nuptial agreements inthose situations and really can
prevent, prevent, you know,those situations where there's
fighting or disputes in thatsecond marriage or even the
first marriage.
You know, doing that prenuptialagreement the first time.
(08:50):
I think it's just one of thosetaboo subjects people are so
worried about bringing up.
Kelly Krupinski (08:57):
I think it's just one of those taboo subjects
people are so worried aboutbringing up.
But you know, it's definitelymaybe sometimes hard to bring it
up, but especially in a secondmarriage but also a first one,
(09:23):
it's a good way to kind ofdiscussions about how you plan
to handle finances handle assets, those sorts of things, it's
always always beneficial.
Cary Jacobson (09:27):
Yeah, I mean I can, at least in my experience.
Finances is one of the mainreasons people get divorced, not
to mention the communication.
But I don't think you know manycouples do have those
conversations about how they'regoing to handle finances in a
relationship and then you knowyou have couples with differing
(09:50):
values when it comes to money.
Right, you can have someone whois the spender and you have
someone who is the saver, andthen that can get really messy
when you're going through adivorce because it's like well,
why should we divide the assetsof this?
You know the person who's beensaving when the other person was
spending.
So a prenuptial agreement wouldaddress all of that.
Kelly Krupinski (10:13):
Absolutely.
Cary Jacobson (10:13):
Yeah, Do you find that you know when your clients
are dealing with high emotions,how do you help them with those
practical solutions whenhandling the emotional side of
the divorce process?
Kelly Krupinski (10:47):
although there are solutions and practical
solutions that you need to reach, I think you can't just ignore
that the emotions are really thedriving force behind everything
.
So definitely just kind ofacknowledging it and and not to
be their therapist, because thatyou know not the role of an
attorney, but but just to say,look, this is hard, this is you
know, this is something that youhave to deal with and you know,
(11:09):
if there are children involvedand you're trying to still
handle everything you need to dofor the children while handling
everything for the divorce,it's, of course, very hard to
manage those emotions.
So I just think, addressing it,really just making sure that
the client knows that you areaware of this and it's you know,
(11:31):
even if you are an attorney andthis is what you deal with all
the time, it is still reallyhard for the person that's
dealing with it.
Cary Jacobson (11:37):
Yeah.
Do you ever find situationswhere you may refer that
individual to either a therapistor a divorce coach?
Kelly Krupinski (11:46):
Absolutely yeah , because you know, if it's
something where that person isspending a lot of time just
focusing on that and then it'snot, it's kind of impairing
their ability to get to thosepractical solutions, then that
is certainly where anotherprofessional would be helpful.
Cary Jacobson (12:01):
Yeah, I think sometimes having that outlet of
working with a therapist or acoach can be really helpful for
people to discuss thoseemotional aspects so that they
can make the important decisionsrelated to their divorce.
Kelly Krupinski (12:19):
Yep.
Cary Jacobson (12:32):
So for any of our listeners who may be parents.
Kelly Krupinski (12:34):
Is there any advice that you would give them
to ensure that the divorceprocess minimizes the impact on
their kids?
I think which I think reallymost of the people kind of do
this anyway but just making surethat your focus is the children
you know and generally peopleeverybody is like, of course
that is my main goal, but Istill think sometimes, even if
that is your main goal to focuson the children these emotions
(12:54):
do come up and anger comes upabout you know the other person.
So, just trying to maybe focuson the children and even if you
might think something is better,try to consider other
possibilities or try to considercompromises to ensure that the
children are kept in theforefront of everything.
Cary Jacobson (13:13):
Yeah, are there any particular practical things
that you advise clients on asfar as how to focus on the kids
or to minimize that impact?
Kelly Krupinski (13:25):
or to minimize that impact.
I think there are lots of waysfor communication between the
parents that you can do, andsometimes we'll recommend like
an app where they might haveeverything in there so there's a
record of everything.
There's a lot of them out therethat do this.
That just kind of makes iteasier to look back and record
(13:46):
text messages.
Things can't be erased, thatsort of thing, so that way it
just makes it so everybody'saware of.
This is kind of how we're goingto move forward and I think
that's been helpful for a lot ofclients.
Cary Jacobson (13:58):
Yeah, the one I think I recommend the most and
I've seen the courts typicallyrecommend the most is Our Family
Wizard and we can add a link ofthat to in the show notes.
But you know many of them.
There are paid ones and thereare free ones.
It kind of depends on how youknow what features you need, but
a lot of them will have lots ofdifferent pieces in it.
(14:21):
I think Our Family Wizard hasan expense tracker and a
calendar like a shared calendar,and also, like you mentioned,
you know the communication toolbuilt in and God forbid if
anything happens in the futureand you end up back in court you
know you have access to all ofthose communications without
(14:41):
having to go back to textmessages and emails and that
sort of thing.
So, yeah, okay, Is there anyparticular, you know, piece of
advice or encouragement that youwould like to leave our
listeners with who are goingthrough and navigating this
divorce process?
Kelly Krupinski (15:04):
I just think, reminding people that it is a
process, just like anytransition.
It can sometimes beuncomfortable, sometimes be
uncomfortable, but I think atthe beginning a lot of people
are just so overwhelmed by thethought of thinking everything
needs to change, you know, andeverything's going to change, in
kind of the logistics of things.
But I think is, you know, yougo through it and you start to
(15:25):
recognize, well, this is whatthis aspect might look like and
how that might look in thefuture.
I think you start to realize,okay, there is a light at the
end of the tunnel and so youknow, just recognizing that,
that it is a transition and it'ssometimes bumpy and messy, but
it does eventually get to thepoint where you are in a much
(15:48):
better place.
Cary Jacobson (15:49):
Yeah, absolutely Related to that and recognizing
that it is a process and thatyou know, every situation is
somewhat different, but is therea typical timeline that you,
you know, see with your clientsas to how long that process
takes?
I know that people often ask,well, how long is this going to?
(16:12):
You know, take us to handle.
So is there something that youtypically see as far as what
that process looks like?
Kelly Krupinski (16:20):
I think it also depends on kind of what path
the client might choose.
So you know, if they'redeciding they want to kind of
work on this agreement beforefiling anything with the court,
we usually give about six monthstime to try to really do the
negotiation piece, you know backand forth and getting the
agreement completed and thenhopefully even within that time
(16:44):
have the divorce done throughthe courts.
Sometimes that can take alittle longer, depending on
assets, custody issues, whatevermight happen, but generally six
months to do the negotiation.
If they choose to do mediation,that we usually try to say, you
know maybe two to threesessions, depending on a two
(17:06):
hour sessions, depending on,again, the same kind of issues,
and then that's sort of based ontheir schedule and when they
can kind of fit that in.
But if the two of them areworking together and able to
really communicate, I would saywithin six months probably that
it can be completed.
Cary Jacobson (17:23):
Yeah, and for all of those listeners out there
that you know, six months isnothing when we're talking about
the alternative of court world.
Six months is nothing whenwe're talking about the
alternative of court world.
You know, and here in MarylandI would say, the fastest I have
seen, a divorce that has goneall the way through court
(17:44):
probably is more than a year,just because of scheduling and
all of the things that go intothat process.
I would say 12 to 18 months isprobably the most common.
So six months is relativelyshort when we're talking about a
timeframe.
We've seen them happen muchquicker than that, if you know,
(18:07):
if people are working together,but I would say six months is
pretty common for our clients.
Kelly Krupinski (18:14):
And I would say also that if they decide or are
unable to do it throughthemselves without using the
court, lots of times, the courtis going to order them to do
what we're trying to accomplishwithout getting the court
involved anyway, such asmediation or those sorts of
things.
So it's, I just think, way morebeneficial to try to get this
(18:38):
resolved, get many of the issuesresolved, before filing
anything with the court.
Cary Jacobson (18:43):
Absolutely.
Is there any last piece ofadvice that you would like to
share or, you know, share howlisteners can learn more about
you and what you do at JacobsonFamily Law.
Kelly Krupinski (18:57):
Sure, they can go to JacobsonFamilyLaw.
com that's our website and theycan schedule a consultation with
me, with you, and see the bestway that we can help them.
I think we also have a lot ofgreat resources on that website
with blogs, and that might giveinformation that you might have
more specific questions about.
Cary Jacobson (19:19):
Absolutely.
Thank you so much for beinghere and sharing your experience
and advice.
I appreciate it.
Kelly Krupinski (19:25):
Thank you so much.
Intro/Close Speaker (19:29):
Thanks for joining us today on this episode
of Divorce Diaries.
Thanks for joining us today onthis episode of Divorce Diaries.
Remember, every journey isunique, but you don't have to
navigate it alone.
No-transcript.
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