1.8 The Sparkle. the Glint. The Glimmer.

Episode Transcript
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Isaac Allen Burns (00:31):
Hey, everybody. Welcome to this,
another episode of DodoBorne.It's me, your GM, and your
icosahedron, Isaac Allen Burns.And joining with me today are
three other platonic solidpolyhedrons. To my left, my
tetrahedron, I have one RowanCollins.

Rowan Collins (00:51):
You're making me do math on this episode.

And, next to Rowan Collins is my octahedron,
one Joe Diametti

Joe Diametti (01:00):
You're making me learn words, and that makes me
uncomfortable.

And next to Joe, we have one dodecahedron
named Annie Hawthorne.

Annie Hawthorne (01:10):
That's 12. Right?

Yeah. That's right. And for those who are
listening, just so you know, aplatonic solid is a convex
regular polyhedron inthree-dimensional Euclidean
space, which is super coolbecause those are also the
shapes of all your dice. That'sright. We're here to teach you
something.
We're here to learn something.And I think without further ado,
I, your Dtwenty, youricosahedron, Isaac Allen Burns,

(01:34):
are gonna take you on a newjourney in the world of Altea.
Pause for music. Anyways, justto recap the last episode, our

(02:51):
gang went to sleep. They hadrevealing dreams perhaps that
dove into some of their greatestnightmares, or was it all just
crazy dream logic?
I guess we're gonna find out.But in any case, they woke up
with a variety of emotionsregarding what they had all
seen. Kapi left in a hurry toconfront Cyrus himself, claiming

(03:13):
that he knew stuff that hewasn't letting the people in on.
Kapi also questioning why he wasstill a rookie after eight long
years. Meanwhile, our twofriends

Best friends.

Best friends. Please. Frank and Pistachio went
to the bakery and talked toScarlett who revealed some
dramatic news in that she wasgetting married off to one of
the nephews of Viscount EdgarBalthazar. In shock, they asked
if she thought that Kapi wouldtake her away if he knew that
she still somewhat had feelingsfor him. Kapi, at the time, was

(03:48):
interrogating random citizens ofthe town.
Finally getting back together,our three heroes elected to go
to the barracks based on somenews that they heard from Miles,
the bartender, that Stethanelgot his leg broken by none other
than Ash. We find them now onthe way to the barracks. As you
know, this is a very small town.Wilderness is all around you.

(04:10):
And as you walk towards thebarracks, you step past the
wooden gates that sort ofsurrounds the town.
When I say gates, I'm being sogenerous. It's the kinda, like,
just gates that were put upthere just to say you have a
gate. It's not really gonnadefend anything because, you
know, Dragon Road hasn't seenthat kind of action. But you
step outside. You pass by twoolder peacekeepers.
Right? Some of the vets who'vebeen here a long time. Most of

(04:32):
what they do is just kinda sitat the gate. They nod to you as
you leave. As you head towardsthe barracks, you swear once
again in the corner of youreyes, you look out in the
forest.
There's just a twinkle, strangetwinkling, almost like a glow
beckoning you towards it. Butyou've got a mission, and you
keep walking. The barracksoutside of here were set up

(04:52):
during the civil war, so theyare very recent and very modern.
It was originally thought thatthis was going to be a sort of
headquarters for the Volhanearmy. Unfortunately, due to its
lack of tactical positioning ofBracken Road, it didn't really
surmount.
So you've got, like, a hugebarracks. It's, like, three
stories. Could probably holdabout a hundred soldiers, and,
six people are in it. So well,you head up to the front gates,

(05:15):
and you see there they are, thethe barracks. The gates are
open.
The barracks are just out ofyou.

It's going?

Yeah. Alright.

You head up. You knock on the door, and they
swing open lazily because noone's guarding it. And inside,
you see one of the peacekeeperswho's there. He's on front desk
duty today, and he is fullyasleep.

Hello? I like Try and tap him lightly.

Attention. Soldiers
are yeah. Alert. You three, are you
scheduled for a meeting today?

Are you in a place of being able to question

my Yes. I am. I am the front desk sergeant.
I'm not a sergeant, but I'm thefront desk person.

Yeah. And state your business here immediately.
Yeah. We're just looking for ablue guy with horns.

We're also looking for a Nathaniel. We
heard he broke his leg.

Those two things are related. We heard of
a blue horned individual who washarassing one of our soldiers
and wound up attacking him. Andthough our soldier definitely
evaded his blows, he tripped ona rock and broke his leg. And
that is the story we were toldby that soldier. But you want
information on the blue hornedindividual.

(06:30):
Do you have any information forus?

Well,

Speak with your chest, soldier.

Yeah. The blue horned individual broke that
guy's leg What? In half.

That doesn't

When is corroborated?

That doesn't track with the story we were
told.

Well

One of these must be a lie.

Considering Sothaniel's kind of,
embellishing a lot of theirstories, maybe it's that one.

What? Who would accuse your fellow soldier
of hyperbole? Yes.

Yes.

These soldiers need more discipline.
What to do here? I'm at a loss.Well

We could figure it out for you if you let us
talk to Nathaniel.

This is true. A professional should look into
this. Well, gumshoes, I'mofficially hiring you as private
investigators. Oh. So follow meto the victim, and he marches
down the hall.

I march behind him.

I look at, Kathy and, Craig and go, okay. So
what's the plan of this guy?Who's the good cop? Who's the
bad cop? And who's theincompetent cop?

Guys, let's not give into the theatrics here.
Everything these people do isjust so

So you wanna be the good cop?

Definitely not okay. He's not giving into the
theatrics.

Oh, yeah. Says this as he's marching
behind the guy as as you'rewalking behind.

Alright. I'm not gonna play good cop with
Stutthaniel. First off, his nameis Stutthaniel. I'm not going to
I'm not gonna pretend to have agrown up conversation with a man
named Stutthaniel. Grow up.

Yeah. What a dumb name. Yeah.

I'm really sure he picked that name.

Yeah. I think his parents probably picked that
name.

Yeah. Probably because they knew he was never
gonna grow up. Harry.

See, he seems to be a little better.

Yeah. That was more Kapi like, I wasn't saying.

Alright, Kapi. You could be the bad cop then.

Perfect.

As in the bad ass cop. Yo.

Language soldier, says the soldier in
front of you.

I'm sorry.

Eventually, he eventually, he leads you to a
door with a, nine pointed staron it that says infirmary.
Busting inside. Well, I saybusting. That sounds really

he sorry.

Let me try that again. Let me take that
again. Opening the door. Buy the

barrick dinner first.

He does not pull a, episode 25 of Neon
Evangelion. He instead goes,that's a deep cut for

two people. Deep cut.

He, he walks inside the door very calmly as a
soldier would and stands atattention. And you see inside is
a bed, a single bed. And layingon that bed is Nathaniel, his
leg in a cast and his face in afrown, and he sees the three of
you, and his eyes roll. He says,come to gloat that I broke my
leg by falling on a rock.

That's not true. You both

know it. What? What do you know?

Oh, I love I love badass Craig. I I whisper to
Pistachio.

What do you mean, robot? You don't know
anything. I know more than youthink I know. What? What's that
supposed to mean?
Expound. It

means I talk to the bartender.

Oh, shit. Hi. Real quick.

Where is it? Have you seen, Nefanie? For no
reason. Just a

Nefanie's on a patrol right now.

Yeah. Nefanie's okay. It was Craig. Do your
thing.

So what happened between you and Ash?

Well, I was at the bar waiting for you
losers to go get eaten by a acidburrow or whatever. To fight? I
did not pick a fight. He camein, and he was talking to me. He
seemed cool at first, and thenhe was called me a government
dog.
Couldn't handle his one drink. II was I was not talking to
walking back

and forth behind Craig, like like the worst hype
man you've ever seen.

He started he started calling me a bunch of
just a bunch of inappropriatethings that I did not
appreciate. That is probablytrue. Oh. And so I told him to
stick it where the sun don'tshine. You're kidding.
You're probably coward. And hetold me that he could he could
take me. And so I said, youcan't take a proud soldier of
Volvane. So we went outside, andbefore I could swing on him, I

(10:27):
tripped on a rock and broke myleg.

Uh-huh.

Rock kicked your ass?

Yeah. Have you ever seen this man before?

No. I've never seen him before. He was
just, like, he just showed up.He was talking shit. And then
after he's after he watched mebreak my leg

You mean broke your leg in half?

I wanna do a presence check.

Yeah. Or a

yeah. A presence.

Oh.

Well, what are you trying to do? Hang on.
What's Kathy trying to do?

I wanna do an instinct check, I lied. I wanna
perceive.

Oh, okay.

Do it up. My instinct is a plus zero.

Okay. Do it up.

That's a 10 with hope.

What is thinking of that? What are you
perceiving?

Oh, yeah. I guess I I guess I'm just, I'm trying
to perceive if he knows anythingelse or if there's anything else
that's, like, part of the storythat he's leaving out besides
the fact that he obviously gothis ass kicked.

Yeah. So this is definitely an instinct check.
You can tell a 10 with hopethat's pretty good that would
succeed at sussing outsomething. So as this guy's
talking, sometimes, when we tryto tell a lie, it's best to tell
half truths. This guy is We're

here to teach you something.

We're here to teach you something. And so as
you are watching him talk aboutit, he is clearly lying about
his leg getting broken. Like,clearly, it was broken by this
guy. Mhmm. But the way that heis talking about this guy,
because he talks a little moreabout it.
The way that you notice he talksabout it is he almost seems

(11:53):
uncomfortable by him. Not in away of, like, oh, I'm mad that
he broke my leg. I would takehim on again. More like, I don't
wanna mess with that dude again.And it seems to go beyond just
he got overtaken in battle.

Mhmm. Nathaniel. I wanna, like, flip the chair
around and sit in it like a oldteacher. I feel like I've
already done this bit.

I'm just I'm gonna do it as a captain. Yeah.
That's how Kathy talks.

He flips the chair around. He suspects, Nathaniel.
Listen. We all get scaredsometimes. I don't, but I could
see how someone named Stefanielswould.

He's lying. Frank? Shh. He's a he's a good
cop.

Frank, not in front of the kids. So listen.
Why don't you help us out? Okay?Just can you tell us anything
about where he went, if therewas any part of the story that
you feel you've left out besideshim obviously breaking your leg?
Was there foul play? Was theremagic? Was there anything that

(12:55):
you can give us about whathappened and or where he went?
And we'll go take care of it,big bad man.

He's bristling at you with your
condescending tone.

I kiss him on the forehead.

Kinda like, he's like, oh, don't don't touch
me. I'll get you right now. Ifmy leg hadn't been broken by
falling on a rock, I would whatI would do.

Oh, really? Okay. And, Pistachio will reach out to
his leg and just, like, tap itreally hard, and then they tap
it really hard. They will cureit. Three hit points.

Three hit points. You heal the leg.
Pistachio, we flashback to aconversation that you had once
with the priest. The priest istalking to you. This is shortly
after the Quackers incident, andyou're sitting there in front of
the priest, and the priest says,look, kid, pistachio.

(13:51):
I don't know quite how to tellyou this, but, see, magic and
various connections to healingmagic is very useful for healing
various maladies and wounds anddiseases. And when we use too
much magic, there are certainside effects that can occur.
Think of it like there are partsof the body, that will grow

(14:15):
weaker as that sort of relies onmagic. Right? Another thing is
that the body sometimes healsvery slowly, and so magic is a
very fast process a lot oftimes.
And so when things heal veryquickly, it can often be a very
painful like, for instance, ifyou broke your arm and it
doesn't get set properly and youjust use magic to fix the arm,
it's gonna be a very painfulprocess of where the bones sort

(14:38):
of bend themselves, but in a waythat's a little less natural.
And even when the bones are set,if they get healed instead of,
like, having allowing time forthe body to naturally heal it,
it can be very painful. It'sreally good, in high intense
situation because whenadrenaline is pumping, you won't
even feel it. You know, yoursoul acts as a natural defense

(14:58):
mechanism. But, you know, in alot of ways, that's why people
become doctors because we needto learn ways, you know,
holistically to do it.
And, Pistachio, I really gottatell you, I know you really
wanna be a doctor, and you havereally great grades. But you
have really good grades forsomeone who is here in Bracken
Road. Right? If you wanna go toa really good medical college,

(15:20):
being from here has certainchallenges. So maybe try a year
of being in the adventuringguild, and that could probably
propel you to be able to getinto those schools where you
could be a doctor.
How does that sound to you?

You mean, it won't take me from here because
I'm what? We're we're bad atteaching?

No. It's not that we're bad at teaching. It's
just that, certain individualswho want to pursue this line of
work have various resources thatwe just don't have access to
here. Some of them have tutors.Their schools are able to
provide more for them.
It's not that we're bad. It'sjust that we don't have access
to this resource.

So when I got a heal, like, fifteen broken legs
and, like, patch up, like,twelve different stitches and,
like, see the inside ofsomebody's skull before it'll
take me on?

Well, think of it as experience is a great
teacher. Right? If you'resomeone who has a year of
experience in the adventuringguild where you're healing
people in high intensesituations, having to make those
snap decisions, that could gofar away, in sort of the
placement. So you can certainlystill try. I just think that,
you know, take a year just tosee what medicine can be like.

(16:32):
Because I think that if youspend that time healing people
in that way, I think you'll geta really good appreciation for
how important, like, propermedicine and proper healing is.
You know? You can't just slap abroken leg and make it bend
together just like that, and wecut forward, and you hear a
vicious grinding of bone. AndNathaniel screams really loudly

(16:54):
and grips his leg and says,okay. Okay.
Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
Oh, so

that's what the priest

meant. Okay. Okay. I'll tell you. Okay.
Look. Okay. Yeah. He broke myleg. Okay?
He got I don't know. He moved sofast. I tried to hit him with a
round with the roundhouse kick,you know, because, you know, the
roundhouse kick's so strong. I Iget hit so hard, and yet he got
around it, got behind it, had myleg above my head, and next
thing I know, I felt a sharppain, and I was on the ground,
and he went, look. Okay.

(17:26):
He leaned down and whisperedinto my ear, and he said, soon,
this will all be dust and ash.And then he walked away, and he
walked, like, kinda northeast.Okay. And I was freaky, and
actually, you know and thenStephanie comes up and says that
all of you ran off towardssomewhere, and then I passed out

(17:48):
from the pain. Okay?
But it was really freaky. Hekinda he looked at me with eyes
of, like, he's oh, look. He'she's freaky. Okay? I didn't like
that guy.

Hey. Thank you. Sorry about your leg. Quick
huddle, guys. I think

I'm gonna pass out.

Here's some a pistachio will grab into their
fanny pack. They will have,like, a little thing of alcohol,
and then that'll say, here yougo. I should've done that first.

He is fully passed out. His eyes have ruined

his eyes. Oh,

I will just, like, splash it on his face.

My eyes. Oh, my eyes. Look out of my eyes.

Oh, my eyes.

Holy Get out of my room. Get out of here.
Okay? You win. Is that what youwanted to hear, you blue guy?
You win. Okay?

Not like this. Come on, Pistachio.

Guys burn so bad. It

burns so bad.

Frank, this is your your one job is to watch
Pistachio. Make sure that theydon't get weird.

I was doing a cop and a cop. Did I do it too good?

You,

it was very convincing to me.

Very convincing. Let's go have the huddle.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Wow. I

I like Neil to be a part of the huddle.

I like to stand on my toes. Okay. So north

eye level with Kathy.

So north northeast. Okay. Okay. This is
gonna sound really weird, butdid you see a sparkle, a glint,
a glimmer in the Northeastdirection?

A north Northeast what?

Direction.

Okay.

What did you think I said? Get out of here,
you sicko.

I feel like happy wouldn't admit if he did. Let's
you know what, kid? Let's assumeyou saw a sparkle, a glint, a
glibber in the north direction.Northeast. Northeast direction.

Did you see it quick? Direction.

I think so. It was like it was there or not. I
wasn't sure if I was dreamingagain.

I think we need to go that direction. We need to
be ready.

Alright. Listen. I'm I'm willing to take lead on
this, not because I sawanything. I feel like we've been
spending too much time together.Right?
You guys are talking abouthaving the same dreams and
seeing the same glibber.

We're becoming a real team, Kathy. We're like
brothers only closer.

I was very,

Okay.

So,

yeah, let's go.

Yes. That was a Spongebob joke.

Because I

looking at Kapi while he's Uh-oh. Pretending not
to know all of this. Yeah. Do Ithink he's lying about the dream
and about the glimmer?

Oh, give me an instinct check.

I feel like Pistachio trusts Kathy a %
except around their mother, sowe'll not even try.

That's only a nine with fear.

A nine with fear. You know, this is
something small, so I'm justgonna bank that fear. I'm gonna
bank it. So I now have anotherfear. Hi.
Me, GM. Isaac Allen Burns here.I currently have quite a few
fear. I can't wait to find outhow I'll use it. Anyway, back to
the story.
You look at Kapi. Kapi is in astate. I think that's the thing

(21:01):
you can tell most. There's a lotgoing on in Kapi mind. Whether
or not he did or didn't see it,something has kind of maybe
gotten under his skin.
Maybe it's thrown him offbalance. Maybe he's off kilter.
I don't think Crank knows, butCrank can definitely tell

(21:21):
something's going on with Kapi.

Well, as we're walking towards the Northeast, I
will just be like, how are youdoing, Kapi?

Oh, I'm I'm good, Crank.

You seem weird. Weird? Me?

First off, I'm the coolest one out of this trio. I
wanna be I wanna be very clear.

Yeah. That's right. Actually, I don't emit
heat, so I don't think that'strue. Oh, wait. You just seem
not yourself today.
Would you like some fabric? Ican probably find you some.

No. I I think I've got I think I've got all the
fabric I need, cranky.

Appreciate it. I've got more apple fritters.

Okay. I'll take I mean, I'll take

an apple fritter. An apple fritter.

Yeah. I just eat it, like, for some.

You know, if you ever wanna talk, you know,
I'm here. I don't have ears, butI do have audio receptors.
Craig.

Okay.

Okay. Yeah. I don't know. We I just think
we're all probably hiding stuff.Right?

Oh.

Like, where do you go with the red eyes? Where does
Pistachio when they're talkingabout being a doctor and also
doing magic? And Well, admireinto a dodo once an episode. I
just think

What's an episode?

I just think I just I just think that maybe
it's better for us in the longrun that we don't get too close.
Right, Craig? Because you'regonna go be a wizard. That's the
plan. Right?

You're not coming with me?

To Polaris.

A wizard?

To Polaris.

Mhmm. I invited Scarlet too.

No. No. Scarlet has her life mapped out here. I
don't know

if that's

true. It's going to do very well.

I don't know if that's true either.

And I also have my life mapped out here.

I don't think that's true either. But if it
makes you feel better, I cantell you where I go and my eyes
turn red. I shrink down really,really small, and I go deep deep
inside. And all I can do is seeand hear, and I don't have
control over my actions.

Wait

a second. Hold on. That doesn't sound healthy
either. Has the resident doctorin training? I think you should
see a doctor.

I don't know if what I need is a machinist. But,
anyway, I'm just I'm not tryingto hide anything.

Okay. Well, why do you wanna become a wizard?

Well, I wanna become a wizard because my
master was a wizard, and and hewas he was gonna do great
things. And I need to carry onhis legacy.

He was a mentor?

He was my mentor.

Yeah. Did he support you?

I think so. I think we supported each other.

Yeah.

He taught me a few things. He gave me these
fancy gauntlets. They somehowturn on. I haven't been able to
figure that out yet.

They look cool, Craig.

Yeah. They hit hard.

Well, it sounds like he set you up for success.

Yeah.

Yeah. Did

your mentor not set you up for success?

Oh, god.

Kathy, I feel like it would help you if it got
out of your body.

If it got out of my body?

Yeah. Whatever you're not saying is stuck in
here between your shouldersright here.

Yeah. I think it comes out your eyes.

My eyes.

Yeah. It's sometimes And sometimes we

can get some cloth to help.

If it would make you feel better, I could turn it
to an emotional support dodo.

This is feeling like more of an intervention.
The further we walk. Guys, Ijust wanna save the town. Don't
we all wanna save the town?

We do.

Save the Apple Festival. Save the girl.

Yeah. Save the barista. Save the world.

Save the barista. Save the world.

Yes.

Save the barista.

Alright. Hands in. Crank first because I don't want
the crushed. Alright. Hand in.
Pistachio on top.

I am on

top. Save the town and stop bringing up emotional
trauma on three. One. Two,three. I refuse to make that
promise.

I refuse to make that promise.

I mean, I I don't know. Is it never mind.

The three of you have been walking for a
while. And as you look up, time,has gotten almost past you guys.
The sun is beginning to sinklazily down towards the horizon.
And it's probably about lateafternoon when the three of you,
following some kind of path,it's weird. You look down at the

(25:54):
ground, you don't see a path,but your feet seem to know where
to go.
Almost something pulling youtowards it. You find yourself in
a sort of glen close to themountains up north. There are
stones and ruins overgrown withtrees and vines all around.

(26:15):
Something was here at one point,but now it's well taken over by
nature. Three of you stepfinally into this little
clearing within the glen.
Behind this clearing, you cansee almost a sheer wall, a cliff
face of the mountain, and yet infront of it, you see this large
circular dais. It seems veryfamiliar to the three of you,

(26:40):
almost like what you saw in thatdream. Three of you are standing
there. You see towards the backof this dais, the opposite side
from where you stand, so itlooks like an altar with a small
indent going across it. It isempty, but it is there.
And this is what the three ofyou see.

I imagine think I like it here.

I imagine it's one of those things where we were
having that conversation, and wejust look up, and all of a
sudden, we're there. But wedon't really

Yeah.

Know how we ended up there.

I'll at the end of Mulan's, like, I'll make a
man out of you when they justlook up and there's a decimated
village. That's the, like, kindof

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. You see overgrown ruins all around you.
And yet this clearing here, nota speck of dust on the stones of
this diet. What?

Is it quiet, or do we hear the sounds of nature?

You hear the rustling of the leaves and the
trees. You hear a distantflitter of a bird. You hear the
rustling of underbrush. Natureis very much alive here.

Should I talk to the grass?

I mean, there's birds.

Or birds. Would it make you more comfortable if
I talk to birds?

I just think if we're going off the things that
might be able to help us.

Oh, that's true. They are more brady. I look
around to see if there's a birdthat I could talk to.

Yeah. You look around, Pistachio, and you
see with your eyes as you'relooking, you see a lone turn
sitting on a branch high aboveyou.

Okeydokey. I will try to talk to it.

Very good. Use that ability that you have.

I sure will. I will ring. I'm doing an instinct
roll to see if I could I rolleda 17 with hope. So

Wow. That's so good. That's really good.

Will hopefully give me the new information that
they know. So I will actually, a19 with hope. Pistachio will
turn to the bird and go, hello,turd. Are you You're not
touching. What is what is thisplace?

Tweet tweet. What's that? What's this place?

Yeah. What's This is

a forest. Don't you see the trees?

Yeah. But what's that? You silly.

You silly, little goose. Uh-huh. What'd you
want? I'm not

a goose. But From

up here, you look like a goose. You got a big
long neck. You're walking andwaddling around. I no. I I don't
wanna know what this place is.
It's a forest, silly.

Yeah. But what's that dais thing?

Oh, I know I know instinctually what it is.
It's a place of great power. Ireally like being near it. Makes
me feel good.

It makes you feel good?

Yeah. Being near it makes me feel good. Do
do

do do do. Oh, I it's not time for dancing turd.

It's time for dancing, especially when there's
another bird around. You see anyother turds? I'm trying to get
some. You know what I mean?That's what I do as a bird.

Wow. Okay. Remind me not to be a dodo. I if I turn
to everybody else, remind me notto be a dodo in here. That turd
is very horny.

Oh, you're turning to dodos?

Doesn't look like it has horns to me.

Yeah.

What's it saying, Pistachio?

Oh, it's saying this is a place of great power.

Great power.

Great. Talking to your friends over
there?

Yeah.

Hey.

Do you

have any good turds?

I don't

know any other fellow turds looking like
me, but different from me.

Yeah.

I'm trying to lay some eggs. You know what I
mean?

Yeah. I know. Sweet tweet. I know. You have to
further your species

in any

way possible.

It's really easy around here.

Not like the dodo.

Really easy around here?

Yeah. Everything's fertile around
here. Everything's fertile?Yeah. Plants grow real easy
here.
Tweet tweet.

Like how easy?

Oh, really easy. Look around you. Did you
know that this used to be aplace that had a bunch of, like,
big stones? Like, someone putthem there. Tweet tweet like a
nest, Or for people walkingaround on two legs.

Oh, wow.

Love this fucking bird.

Yeah. And then it, then it wasn't. At
least that's what the ancestorstell me.

I have ancestors.

Okay. Have you, have you touched the dais?

Oh, no. I will I haven't done that.

Do we do it? Why?

I'm not supposed to.

Why?

That's just as instinctually. I know. I'm
not the kind of person who'ssupposed to. There are people
who are supposed to touch it,but I'm not one of them.

Would you know internally if you were a person
to touch the dais?

I don't know. I don't think it works reverse.
Tweet tweet.

Pistachio looks towards the dais. Do they feel
like a compelling need to touchit?

The same kind of compulsion that has pulled
the three of you continuesstill.

I wanna

let Craig touch it.

Yeah. I think, while while, Pistachio is
talking to the bird, Craig isjust gonna, like, step up and
walk towards the altar.

Yeah. Kapi's watching Crank.

Craig, you step up on the altar. You step
up on the dais. It's actually,though, the bird looks at Crank
and says,
oh, one person touched on the dais.
Tweet tweet. Time to go.Goodbye.
The bird flies away.

Uh-huh. Okay.

Crank, you stand on this dais. Nothing's
different. You're still standinghere.

I won't feel anything.

No. You really don't.

I'm gonna walk forward, and I'm gonna put my
hand on the altar.

You put your hand on the altar, and you feel
a deep emptiness. There'ssomething missing.

In me or in the altar?

In this place.

In this place. Something's missing. Something's
missing.

What do you mean?

Something's missing.

K.

I feel it.

Okay. Alright. Come on, Pistachio.

Okay.

We also walk up.

Three of you walk up, all stepping onto the
dais. There's a beat wherenothing happens. Suddenly
bursting out of the bushes is asmall gnome. He's got a big,
bright, cheery face. He's got abeard that goes down to his
navel.
It's like a white beard. He'sgot a red cone conical hat. He's
wearing, like, a green tunic,and he looks at all three of you

(32:30):
and says, well, look at here.Looks like we got some people on
my dais.

Are you what's missing?

Oh, I've been here a long time. I'd know I'm
missing if I couldn't findmyself. What are the three of
you doing here?

Standing on a dais. Yeah.

Standing on my dais.

Okay. And what, what we'll get off do you want
us off the dais?

Oh, you can stay on the dais if you want.

I'm the one supposed

to clean it. I gotta clean it now anyways.

Oh, it's a nice dais. Thank you. I had

worked very hard on it. Hey.

What exactly is it?

It's a diocese.

For what purpose?

Wait a minute. You don't know what this
place is?

No. No.

What are you doing here then? Why are you
here?

We found it.

You found it? You're just walking around and
you stumbled upon it?

Yeah. Exactly.

You tripped on a rock, hit your head, and
found yourself here inwonderland.

It didn't hit my head, I don't think.

Oh, you don't think?

I do think I have a screw loose, though, if
you know a good machinist.

Well, though, we all have a couple screws
loose as well, I haven't checkedmy old ticker in a while, but I
don't think a machinist is gonnahelp you get out of here.

What do you mean get out of here?

Well, you came here randomly. According to
the three of you, you told meyou just stumbled upon this
place randomly.

We were drawn to it.

Oh, you were drawn here. Wait. Wait. Wait.
That changes the story.
He kinda hops up on the altarand stands up really tall and
says, so the three of you weredrawn here. Tell me about it.
You had an experience. Did youhave a dream?

I looked at Kathy. I'd

okay. Yes. I had the dream.

You had a dream, did you? Suddenly,
there's a spiral like a tornado,and this guy is sitting on,
like, a therapist's chair. Hehas, like, his little legs
crossed. He's got a littleclipboard. The three of you are
now laying down on, like,therapy pictures.
And he says, so you had a dream,did you? Why don't you tell me
about this dream you had? Andtell me how it made you feel.

Well, I guess it all started when I was a kid. I
think that anyways, no. I so,there was a asset borrower. We
fought an asset borrower

Okay.

Alright. Recently in real life, not the dream.

Oh, this isn't the dream. This isn't the
dream.

The real life makes sense for the dream. I'm
getting there.

Okay. Okay. No.

Yeah. It's his first time.

He has a process. Yes.

Of course.

We would we bought an acid borrower in real life.

Okay.

And then the acid borrower showed up in my dream.
Your dream?

My dream dream. Your dream?

My dream dream.

Wow. Showed up in our dream, and, it turned into
the leader or the secretary,owner of the building adventure
guild back in town. Are youfamiliar with Breckenridge?

Well, I can't say I am. Is that a kind of
fruit?

It can't be that far. How long were we walking?
Okay. Then we were in theclouds, and Crank fed wolves
that started making

out. Oh, yeah. Now they did start making out.

Then there was bushes

Alright.

With blackberries, I think, and or thorns.

Both. Yeah.

Yeah. And what happened with your thing again?

Oh, I Oh,

you were getting a rash.

Cut it down with a machete Yeah. That gave
them a rash.

There were four sets of prints. Right?

Yeah. There was four sets of prints.

Well, sometimes there were three.

Sometimes there were three.

But why were there four?

I thought the acid burrower.

Those were the times that you carried it.

Oh. You carried the acid burrow. Why would we do
that?

Seems so. Well, as you know, dreams are
very important. This is a worldof myths and magic, and so
dreams should be takenincredibly seriously. I've never
had a dream before. Really?
You haven't had a dream before?No. We don't really dream. Must
be pretty light up there.Titanium, more like aluminum.
Am I right?

I don't get it.

I don't get it either.

Well, you know, that's an old one. That's
an old joke. You just wouldn'tunderstand it. You're too young.

Then we saw the sparkle.

Oh, yeah.

You saw sparkle? The hot sparkle in G.

Oh. Also, Kapi's been lying to all of us,
and I think that there's adeeper meaning with that, but we
can make an address that later.

Oh, Kapi's Lying?

Well, he said he didn't see the sparkle, and
he didn't have the dream, andnow he did.

I feel so betrayed.

Are you lying to your friends there, blue
cowboy?

Alright. Friends, I you

walk around with three people in the woods
and you stumble upon a dice froma dream you all shared and
you're confused if you'refriends or not?

I'm in charge of protecting them.

There you are. Sure you are, you big bag
of beans.

It's important to me that they are protected
because that is my job as thesenior member at the Adventurers
Guild.

Okay. Well, those words don't mean much to
me, but they seem to mean a lotto you. So I'll let you keep
those in your heart and yourmind.

Okay. What what is what what what Well,

it seems like we're having a discussion of
what our dreams are, but itseems like there's something
else going on here. It seemslike you, three have a lot of
things that you're trying towork out right now, and I'm here
to help. I'm just here tolisten.

A lot of things, but I think, number one,
we need to really understandwhat this place is because it
drew us here. It was like amagnet.

Okay. Well, I see. You know, these things
happen these ways, so I can letthis slide. So the three of you
have stumbled upon here. Okay.
So let me talk a little bitabout myself then as most
conversations are good to startwith. So I am the caretaker of
this place. This is the Sage'sGrove.

What's your name?

My name is Percival Anachronisms, and I'm
the caretaker of this hereSage's Grove. This is a place of
power. You see, back long ago,back in the day when I was but a
young sprout was walking around,it was a old time ago when the
gods walked among us. That'sright. You've probably heard of
the nine gods.
It used to be they'd walk aroundjust like any of us, toddling

(38:02):
around, saying things. Sagewould often come here and preach
on wisdom, say things like, weneed to live a balanced life, or
we need to take care of natureas it takes care of us, or beer
before liquor, never sicker. Youknow, things like that. It's a
wisdom that, it's good to have.And, well, as you know, as the
history tends to go, the godseventually left.

(38:25):
But this place remained.Remained for a long time. Used
to be a temple here, but, youknow, once Sage's relic was
taken, it, sort of crumbleddown. I'm just the caretaker,
you see. I'm not here to defendit.
I take care of it. You know? Idust off the dust. I leaf off
the leaves. I bug the bugs away,and I stick the sticks up my ass
so that they aren't litteringall over the dais.
You understand? Does that makesense to all of you? Yeah.

(38:48):
Alright. Percival.
Yeah. That's my name.

Great. I love what you've done with the place.

Of course. Do

a great job of it. Who is Sage?

I'm sorry. Wait a minute.

Hang on. Think Sage is one of the nine gods. Do
you not know who the nine godsunderstood.

Thank you, tall, dark, and titanium.

I remember, like, roughly in, like, primary school
with

sage. My.

Yeah. Sage is one of the died gods, Kathy.

Yeah. Well, you'll tell one of these kids
you're telling me they don'tteach you about the gods. I'm
guessing they don't what?

I didn't go to school. I don't know. You didn't
have the rest of the books.

They did, but it was one of the classes that is
easily skippable.

Next thing you're gonna tell me is they
didn't even teach you about thegreat seep.

The what? The what? You don't

know about the great seep? Oh, Well, I'm
certainly not going to tell you.You need to do a bit of your own
investigative research, itseems. Put a little gum on your
shoes and walk around and tryand figure out your own
questions. Why don't you?
Gracious. By the night, bysage's ballsack. This is
terrible. You three havedisappointed me greatly. Oh, no.

Well, have you happened to be disappointed by a
blue man with horns lately?

Blue man with horns? I can't say well, I've
met a lot of people in my day.

Have you met anyone in the past two days?

Well, see, that's the problem. The time
doesn't really mean much to meanymore because I've been here
for so long that, you know, tome, this has been so fast. This
has been a whirlwind. Not a lothappens. You see?
I don't really know what timewhat a year feels like anymore.
So tough. But I'm sure sometimein my history, I have seen a man

(40:21):
with horns who is also blue.However, I cannot, for any
certainty, say I've seen onerecently.

Wait. Is this a trap too? Is this a time loop
that we are stuck in?

You're right. This is a time loop. He spins
around, and you're standing onthe edge of the dias, and he's
standing on the altar and says,what are you three doing here?
How'd you get here?

Oh. What? Oh, no. Oh. Oh, crap.

I'm just kidding. It's not a time loop.
I'm just messing up.

Oh, no.

Don't worry, goat hands. It's fine.

Goat hands. She has very sensitive. You really
have to be careful with

them. Goat hands?

Yeah. You got goat hands.

I don't have goat hands. I

have fun hands. Sure. You do. Haven't you
seen a goat? You know what itshands look like?
I do. That's what your feet looklike. You got goat hands to
feet.

Those are my feet. No. My hands.

Yeah. They look like goat hands.

Oh, god.

Don't you worry a little bean about it.

I'm worrying more than a bean about it. Well

Alright.

Help us or not.

Well

This is starting to seem like a dead
end, Kathy.

I I think it's a trap.

Oh, you can't have a little fun these days
with the uneducated types. Soyou three don't know the name of
the nine gods, and you don'tknow what the great seep is.
Alright. Well, I guess I'm gonnafor

a blue man with horns. That's the only reason
we're here.

With horns. But listen. If you're here, that
means very specifically thatdestiny has concentrated itself
around the threads of fate thatsurround your being. Alright?
That was

a lot of prepositions, and I don't know
if I'm following.

Listen. Oh, well, maybe if you spoke less
and listened more, you know, thegods gave you two ears and one
now.

Actually, I have auditory sensors. I don't
know.

Oh my goodness. You know what audio
sensors are, but you don't knowwhat the great seep is. I swear.
Next thing is you're gonna tellme that you understand the laws
of momentum.

I do understand the laws of momentum.

Oh, do you now? Mhmm.

And I will pick up

I'll pick up the gnome Oh. And I'll say
applying a force to

an object creates momentum, and I'll just
toss him.

He, hits a tree, and he Ah. Spread eagle on
it and then falls down. Oh. Andthen a branch falls from the
tree and lands on it.

Oh, no.

And it's a big oof. Wow. That was fun. Oh.
So alright.
He brushes himself off and sitsback on a diocese. Alright. All
of that to say is that there arecertain individuals during times
of crisis let me let me put itin words. So you know how
sometimes the monsters get alittle worse around here,
animals seem vital, people startgetting blood hungry, wars

(42:49):
happen, people kill each other.You know, that happens every so
often.
Well, during these times ofcrisis, certain individuals are,
you know, I've come to not likethe word chosen, so I'm not
gonna say chosen because it'sreally not chosen. Because some
people don't even know what'shappened. But I'm going to say
that certain individuals arebound by the laws of fate

(43:11):
together due to the, we'll say,lingering deific powers that
still exist within the worldtoday. Alright? None so more so
than the great relics of thenine.
Right? So, you know, theseindividuals that seem to be such
as yourselves have a couplebenefits with this. They often

(43:32):
find themselves in the middle ofthing crazy things happening.
Right? First and foremost, youknow, you tend to grow up more
powerful at a quicker rate.
You know? You know? If I was touse a word for it, perhaps
leveling up happens a littlequicker for them than normal
people. Perhaps they can surviveworse or blows. You know?
But, you know, what it all stemsfrom, really, a lot of people
don't know this, but, you know,I'm here to teach you something.

(43:53):
And what I'm gonna teach you isthis, that, back when the gods
were walking around, theyactually had servants that would
follow them around. They wouldact as their confidantes, their
silly rabbits, their muses,their steeds, and, they were
known as dodos, the very dodosthemselves.

Wait. Really?

Yes. Dodos? Yes. Dodos. They were very
brave.
A lot of people don't know this.The issue is, though, they were
very populous back in the day,especially up north. However,
once the gods left, you know,the dodos' whole purpose kinda
left with them. So they justsort of began existing instead
of living. And so, you know,eventually they sort of just

(44:34):
went extinct because whatpurpose did they have?
But their spirit does live on,you know, like I said, certain
individuals find the tides offate, grow strong around them.
And, you know, thoseindividuals, we often call them
dodo born. Booyah. Cue themusic. Hit the music button.
That's right. Cue the music.There we go. That's right. You

(44:57):
all thought that there would bemade up words that didn't mean
anything, that we were justsitting around, and we just came
up with this word out ofnowhere.
But, no, there was a plan thewhole time, you people. Don't
ever doubt the power of stories.That's right. It's me. It's me.
It's me. It's me. It's me. It'sme. It's me.
It's me. It's me. It's me. It'sme. It five steps ahead of you.

Oh my god.

I actually can't fucking believe that you
made I I don't I never saw acomedy. I truly, like

Yeah. I'm sorry, Kai. I

didn't think

that there

was ever gonna be a real meeting out.
That was actually incredible.Absolutely. Now we're gonna
yeah. I'm glad.
Yes. And I think that's whereit's a good place to end our
session today, everybody. Thankyou so much for tuning in to

(46:01):
DodoBorne! You know, before wego, I just wanna thank
Darrington Press for being sowonderful in creating this game.
We love it so much.
And, you know, as they say inVoldain, squawk you later.
Squawk. Squawk. Hey, It's apodcast.

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