January 6, 2025 • 49 mins
Matt, Mike and Doug play a game.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:11):
Don't look under the internet after dark my, I found
(00:37):
out.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
well, I didn't just find this out, but uh, my, uh,
my tism is, and I think Imentioned this to you guys
before too.
I have a near perfect accuracywhenever any movie has come out
Ever.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I'm pretty damn good at guessing when a movie came
out.
How large is the collection ofmovies?
You know when it came out,though.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Well, I don't know.
That's what I'm saying.
I'll just guess.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
If you just say a movie, there's a good chance
that you're going to guess itwhen it came out.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
As long as I know the movie you can't be like.
What about Hillbilly Bumshack?
I haven't heard of it, so Idon't fucking know If it's a
movie I've heard of Sounds likea porno not a movie no, not a
movie, hillbilly bum.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
I'm gonna do the same thing with video games so I get
it.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
No, no, I'm good um, anyway, wow fun, wow.
So the topic today is a thingthat mike and I have done a
couple of times on various formsof podcasts.
Um, and it is something thatwas stolen from another podcast
and actually I don't rememberwhat podcast it's from at this
point.
I think it is something thatwas stolen from another podcast
and actually I don't rememberwhat podcast it's from at this
point.
I think it was something thatwas.
I think it was a Rooster Teeththing, maybe the Rooster Teeth
(01:51):
podcast, but they don't existanymore, so fuck them.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Their ideas are our ideas now.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Yeah, and it's in a spreadsheet and it's called A
Million Dollars, but and so,basically, how this works is I
read out a hypothetical scenario, and this is a hypothetical
scenario that you then have tolive with for the rest of your
life.
But in exchange, you may begetting either two million
(02:17):
dollars, a million dollars,three million dollars or nothing
$3 million or nothing.
So you have to be, you have tohear this hypothetical situation
and then decide whether you'rewilling to take the gamble that
you will get one of thoseamounts of money in return.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Okay so.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
And then I'll tell you how much money it was, and
then I'm going to total up youand Mike at the end and we'll
see who won the most money bywilling to do awful things to
them.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Oh, you're not going to play it.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Okay, okay, I will.
We've done that in the past.
I've got to cover up theamounts.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Just put a piece of paper on that side of the
monitor.
You know, do it these days.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Put your hand up.
Okay, I'm already blind in oneof them there you go.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
Oh, one eye, one out with it, oh me I just had lisa
watch that movie for the firsttime goonies, and like I haven't
watched it in fucking years Ilove goonies.
It used to be my like staystay-home-from-school sick movie
.
It was my sister's too.
She owns on DVD.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
She said the same thing Last time I saw it was
when our park district would dolike movies.
At the park you could just gofor free and just watch a
fucking movie.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Cool, okay, so Neat.
I Okay Neat, I'm happy for youOur first hypothetical situation
and again you have an equalchance of getting $3 million, $2
million, $1 million or nothing.
Every time you have a veryimportant decision, you have to
act it out to other people as amime.
(04:00):
So basically, anytime you'retrying to make an important
decision, you have to mime it.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Oh, we're starting.
This is the situation.
Yeah, gotcha this is thesituation.
Yeah, I mean, that seems notterribly bad, because I fucking
talk with my hands as it is.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
This is for the rest of your life.
You can't talk, though that'sthe thing I think, the downside
of this is you can't getfeedback by talking with someone
.
Every time you have to make animportant decision, you have to
act it out to other people as amime.
So basically, you can't talkthrough important decisions with
other people If you are like,hey, you want to have a baby.
(04:40):
You can't be like, hey, let'sdiscuss that you gotta be.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
like let's discuss that you gotta be like yeah, no,
no, this, this might, thismight come in handy.
You can be like I'm really I'mtrying to have this conversation
with you, but I cannot tell youwhat I'm thinking I, I can only
see this you could just shutpeople down, like not right now,
it's just too much.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
I can only see this going bad, especially if you're
trying to like refinance amortgage or right, or like
imagine, trying to like, imaginebeing at an auction.
You can't, you just raise yourhand.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah, actually, that worked outpretty well for you, never mind
.
Oh well, I don't know.
I don't know.
I think that one is too notworth it.
(05:20):
I need to talk.
Yeah, I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
Can you even explain the situation to people before
it starts happening, like if?
Can you even explain thesituation to people before it
starts happening, if you justend up in a situation where you
suddenly have to make animportant decision with somebody
else and they don't know thatthis is a thing?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
What if you're over the phone as well?
What if you're having to make adecision?
Speaker 1 (05:35):
about your 401k.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
You're not going to go see an actual person, you're
talking on the phone.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
In the age of emails and zoom calls.
It's possible, yeah, but whatif somebody calls you and
there's like there's animportant?
Decision you need to make rightthis second I mean, you can't
really do anything about that ifit's over the phone or if it's
like, they're like, hey, you'dbe like yeah, what if they're
like, hey, should we pull yourwife off of life support?
Speaker 3 (06:05):
I mean you can shake your head, yes or no to that one
, I think no, no.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
I'm saying like, what if this is over the phone?
What if it has to be over thephone because you can't be there
?
For?
Speaker 3 (06:14):
some.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Well then they probably wouldn't take her off
of life support if you didn'tsay anything on the phone what
if you're in jail and you arethe only person who can make the
decision about whether or notyou should take your wife out
with life support?
I'd be like and they have tocall you.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Well, you can't make the decision right, you can only
gesture it.
Could you be like?
You have to come and see me,Because that's not making the
decision.
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
There's a lot of.
We're only on question one.
I'm going to say no.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I'm going to go with.
Yes, I have too many retorts.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yeah, no, this is terrible.
I'm not doing this one.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Let's see how much money.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Doug got I want money I want money, I want money.
Alright, Doug got $3 million.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Hey, retire, I'm done , I'm done.
Retire.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
We're out Florida, I'm done, I'm done retire we're
out Florida, here we go, alright, alright, alright.
So you get the money that youReceive from the.
This is the situation you getthe money that you receive, but
(07:24):
you aren't allowed to spend itas you.
You are given a second identityand you can only use the money
when you are assuming thatidentity.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
That's fine.
Yeah, why?
How does that affect?
Speaker 3 (07:38):
me at all.
I think this needs moreclarification.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
You wouldn't be able to.
Hi, I'm John Smith.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Now I'm going to Zell myself $3 million or Zell
Michael Allen $3 million Done.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
I was going to say you wouldn't be able to take
ownership of anything, youwouldn't be able to buy a house,
and then you own that house,but the other you would.
What is to keep the other youfrom just gifting it?
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Exactly.
Yeah, this is a no-brainer.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Yes, because you can gift anything you want Hi other
me.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
I'm writing Michael a check for $4 million.
Here you go.
That's the only action you needto do.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yes, you can gift cars and stuff too yeah this is
yeah that's fine.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
Yeah, I mean this one's pretty no-brainer.
I don't see a downside to this.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Actually, that's great, because people don't even
won't know I have money then.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
How much should we all get off of that bad boy?
A million dollars, I'll take it.
That's the easiest milliondollars I think I've ever come
across.
I could spend that so quick.
You at home listening playalong with us.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Comment your choice in the comments section, and
then we'll flame you about it.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Every single time you meet someone new, you have to
hug them for 30 seconds.
Speaker 3 (08:55):
I'm good.
I hate touching people.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Honestly, I'll do it.
30 seconds is a long hug.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
That is a long hug.
I will do it.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
I don't meet that many new people.
I don't even know if I'd wantto do it for 20 seconds.
What are we constitutingmeeting?
If I just accidentally bumpinto someone On the street and
I'm like, oh sorry, do I have tohug them?
Speaker 1 (09:15):
or is it like Hi, I'm so, and so I think there has to
be a formal introduction.
You have to learn their name.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Yeah, I'll do it.
See me at the fucking KentuckyDerby, hugging people yeah, I'm,
I'm out on that one.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
I don't, I don't want to do that you can even explain
it away as, like I don't knowthis is.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
I'm legally obligated to do this sorry region of.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Canada or something I don't know.
Okay, yeah, I'd do this, dougwouldn't do it.
I'm out.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
A mill, a millie easiest mill, especially like I
mean, maybe not for you guysthis works, but for me.
I just give off that kind ofvibe where oh, I need a hug no,
it's a hug.
I'm a hugger and I think peopleread that from me and I think
they see that I'm an innocentBoy because I look like.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
I'm not a dangerous looking person, so they're like
oh, he wants a hug cool.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
I'm not a man.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
I'm a boy.
I'm a boy.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Every time you go to bed and you wake up.
You wake up in a womb as anadult, naked, and you have to
bed and you wake up.
You wake up in a womb as anadult, naked, and you have to
relive birth Every time you wakeup.
Is this so?
You have to be born everymorning, except you are adult
size.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
That seems so tedious .
Yeah, but Are you fallingasleep in the womb or are you
being transported in it?
Because I won't lie if I fallasleep in that womb, probably
very comfortable because you'rejust floating in liquid and it's
probably very warm.
It probably is very warm andvery nice.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
It says every time you go to bed you wake up in a
womb.
So I'm assuming you fall asleepin your bed and then you wake
up magically inside a womb.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
Is it?
Well?
I guess there's.
I have a couple questions thatI don't know if we have the
answer to.
Is it painful, or is it justyou slip and slide?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
right out.
Am I coming right out of mymother again?
Or is it just a giant wombappears in my bed and I just
kind of have to fight through it?
Yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Is this like an actual normal-sized woman, where
this is definitely going tokill you?
Speaker 3 (11:20):
You kill a lady every morning, or do you come out of
a?
Speaker 2 (11:23):
bed-sized womb and then a giant doctor smacks you
on the ass and sends you on yourway, like some sort of fever
dream.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
Do I have a new room where all the slopping?
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Bandage-real nightmare is what that is.
Is there a new?
Speaker 3 (11:35):
room in my house that accounts for all the slopping
gook that comes out when I'mrebirthed.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
Yeah, or do you have to be cleaning placenta out of
your fucking bedroom?
Speaker 2 (11:44):
I'm going to go with no because this is really going
to harsh some intimacy in thebedroom with my wife.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Can you imagine going on like a first date with
someone and you just fall asleepin their bed and they just wake
up somewhere in their house andyou're like oh fuck.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Yeah, you can't stay the night anywhere because
they're going to wonder whereyou just vanished to.
I need to know where thatteleports you to, because what
if you're on vacation?
I'm going to say you don't getteleported.
A womb develops around youwhere you are and it just
fucking.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
Oh yeah, which is like a weird group, yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
I'm going to assume that because if you do get
teleported- and it's not evenattached to a woman.
It's just a floating womb.
It just comes out of you andforms around you like some
fucking.
What's his name?
Hr Giger?
Horror nonsense.
What's the guy that directedthe Fly?
Cronenberg, some Cronenbergianshit.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Yeah, I'm going to say no.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Yeah, I don't think I can.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
No, it's just too much.
I want the money regardless,but I don't think no, there's
this it's just too much.
Like I, I want the moneyregardless, but like I don't
know about that one, that'sthat's you already have like
four mil, I know, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Yeah, you're good, I know and like I fall asleep a
lot, like I'm I don't be justI'm oh, my god I'm having micro
naps at night with.
I have a kid I like.
What if you fall asleep on thetrain?
Fuck.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Imagine watching that Some guy falls asleep on the
train and a fucking womb justenvelops, looking like Mothra's
cocoon or something.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah, you get a lot of great party trick yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Well and I.
So just leave me alone for fiveminutes, You'll see the
craziest shit, you've ever seen.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
You won't you won't see a womb.
This is extra bad for mebecause every weekend I take a
nap, because when Amelia goesdown for her nap, I take a nap.
So this would be happening tome minimum twice a day, nah.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
In a standard night I wake up a couple times and go
pee.
That means I gotta wake up at2am and be pee Same.
So that means I got to wake upat 2 am, be born, pee, go to
sleep, wake up again at like 7,pee, be born, pee.
And then I usually like fromlike 7 to 7.30,.
I just like because I set myalarm for 7, but I'm like I
don't got to be up till 7.30, soI'll lay back down.
(14:00):
Yeah, this is too.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
It's way too much.
It's too much.
Imagine having to be birthedlike three times in the morning.
You're like I'm gonna hit thesnooze real quick.
And you're like, oh okay, well,let me get back into bed real
quick.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
Imagine experiencing that and be like I still got a
couple hours exactly.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
I'm not doing anything, you don't know the
time you're like.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
I don't know if I need to be born, if I can just
wait this out.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
No, I'm going to say no on this one.
Yeah, no, it's a no.
How much money did we lose?
Three mil, it seems like athree mil question.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
oh, good job, not even worth there's no way that
would have been worth alright.
Once a month for a 24 hourperiod of time.
You are at the top of the FBI'smost wanted list.
You don't know the day, but youare given a 3 hour advance
notice and you just have toavoid the I'd do this one.
(14:53):
This actually kind of soundsfun you have to avoid the FBI
for a day, and then I guess theyforget.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Easy.
What are we talking about again?
Midnight Strikes are just like.
What are we doing here?
Why are we in Illinois?
Speaker 3 (15:08):
Yeah, no, fuck it.
I'd do it.
I think that'd be anexhilarating way to live your
life once a month.
What happens if they catch you?
Because then exhilarating wayto live your life once a month.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
What happens if they catch you?
They just forget for a month.
You're in jail and they're likewho are you?
Why are you here?
I don't know.
Remember, this is the FBI.
For a day, you really can't doanything.
That's a day a month.
It's random as well, whichsucks.
It's the FBI.
They'll be tracking your phone.
(15:37):
They'll be using like Well,yeah, you just leave your you
leave everything at home youdon't know when it's going to
happen though, but you get threehours.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
Yeah, so, oh, that's true.
So this, this kind of affectsthe rest of your life, though,
because you are going to have tomake sure that you stay in
situations that you can getyourself out of in three hours
which I don't think would bethat hard.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I think what you'd want to establish is a good like
a very secluded, hidden bunker,that is, that you no one else
knows about except you and you'dwant to just like what if
you're more than three hoursaway from it?
Just don't be three hours awayI don't go there.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
I don't want.
I don't want to stay withinthree hours of one single
location for my entire life.
I don't do that a month as itis.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
Yeah, that would suck .
It would be like a full-blownlifestyle change, because unless
you're going purge status andbuild a fortress bunker on your
house or something that you canjust be like, oh well, try to
get in suckers Imagine being outto dinner and all of a sudden
you just get this text whereit's like yeah, three hours, do
you just like smash your phoneand just run off into the
(16:42):
wilderness?
Speaker 1 (16:42):
you just throw your steak the thing is, I do
question how difficult it reallyis to evade the FBI for one day
there's people that are on theFBI's most wanted list for a
long time and they're just outliving.
You know what I'm saying likeright, like you, basically just
don't go out in public, don't behome and don't have your cell
(17:05):
phone on.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Do you think I'll be put on a list if I?
Pull it off for 24 hours if Igoogle how to avoid the FBI, you
think I'm going to be put on alist you google that you're
going to get a 30-hour timer.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Use NordVPN.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
Not a sponsor For the rest of my life.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
I couldn't do this.
That's just going to affect mylife way too much.
I can't do that one.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
I think it sounds fun still.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
You say that until you're 70 having to do this shit
.
And for what?
A mil, nah, I'm good.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
I having to do this shit, and for what?
A mill, nah, I'm good.
Yeah, that's the thing.
It depends on how much moneythis is.
I don't think a million dollarsis going to be worth having to
do this for the rest of my life.
You could use that mill toinvest in whatever bunker or
hideaway plan, but then I'm justnet negative and now I have no
money and now I have to dealwith this.
True.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
So let's say you get three million, you'd have to,
like buy a few houses in likedifferent places so that you
wouldn't have to be three hoursaway from like.
You'd have to be three hoursaway from one of them, obviously
, but like you know, you couldhave your, your summer house and
your whatever, whatever youknow, if you own the houses and
the fbi knows you own the houses, you can't go out, but you
(18:16):
gotta fortify them.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
That's exactly where you don't want to be and you
need to so you're just gonna sitout and like hope that they
can't break through yourdefenses?
Speaker 3 (18:25):
question am I allowed to like?
I feel like that's a fight.
The police on this one like.
Can I like?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
oh, yeah, if you, if you murder a cop like shoot a
cop or they forget it atmidnight.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
You just mow down, they're gonna forget it at
midnight and then you're justgonna have like 20 dead cops on
your lawn and they're gonna belike what happened to?
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Jerry.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Like I don't know, he died over there, I haven't seen
him in like two days.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
Crazy party.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
I'm gonna say no, I think I'm gonna say no as well.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
3-0 yeah, that sounds right the only thing that I
could I would imagine doing.
I don't really go 3 hours outthat often anyway, I would
probably end up using a goodmill of it or something to like
cut a hole in my basementsomewhere like underneath the
sofa, and I would just make atiny little bunker and be like
Lori, I'll see you in a day andI'll just hang out down there.
(19:21):
Even if they raid my home, whatare the odds they're going to
find it?
Speaker 3 (19:26):
I don't know.
I'm sure there's a Mr Beastvideo about that.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
He does bury himself alive for a week or some shit.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
I think there's legitimately an episode where
he's running from an FBI agent.
So we missed out on 3 mil Damn.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
We missed out on Mr Beast, I don't know.
Knowing that it's $3 million,I'm a little tempted.
Too late now.
Hey, it is too late now.
Okay, your arms are replaced bypuppet arms, like.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Muppet cloth arms Like that are controlled by the
little sticks.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Do I still have, but I don't know who's controlling.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Would I still have full functionality anyway?
Like, would I still be able tograb things, cause Muppets grab
things?
Do I have a grip?
Speaker 3 (20:10):
at all.
Can you control them?
Can I do?
Speaker 2 (20:13):
this?
Can you control them, or is?
Speaker 1 (20:16):
somebody do this.
Can you control them?
Or is somebody else pulling the?
Speaker 3 (20:19):
strings Is this for life.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Yeah, this is for life.
I'm saying no, I don't care If.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
I can control them and I still have maneuverability
.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
I'm in.
I feel like that's.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
The shtick, though, is that you don't I thought the
shtick would be just the factthat they look funny.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
Well, if that's the case, then you take the money.
If you the puppet arms are thesame as my arms just felt, then
I'd do it.
If there's no functionality,then no, I wouldn't do it.
I just straight up imagine likeyour arms.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
I'm imagining them just like hanging.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
I imagine your arms get swapped with, like Kermit
the Frog's arms.
That's what I'm picturing andI'm okay with that.
I would accept that.
I would take it Again if I can,if Like green and everything.
If I have functionality to thearms, I'm doing it.
I'll take it Nope, Are we no?
So for my, for my answer, arewe saying that you keep
functionality or is some?
(21:13):
I don't know?
There's no omnipotent beingcontrolling you with the sticks
underneath.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Cause it.
I'm going to say you keepfunctionality, but they move
stupid Like oh yeah, I'm in ahundred percent, I'm in.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
That's hilarious yeah no, I guess I'm in then, if
that's the case, as long as Istill have functionality that's
hilarious.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
I'm not doing this.
How much did I win?
Show me.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
Zero dollars.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Hey Wow, douglas, the frog here.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
It would make sex terrible.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
You just, or maybe it would just make it funny, I'm
coming, wow, hey, I'm coming.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
I'm gonna spoot.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
You talk me into the funniest part is we never
establish that your voicechanges.
But I feel like no, you wouldjust do it Because yeah 100%.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
You gotta match the aesthetic.
This is your personality nowFor the rest of your life.
Anytime you go to the bathroom,it's live streamed.
So basically, dr, disrespect.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Is that what happened with him?
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Not the most recent thing.
That was the first time he wassuspended.
He's like, the most recentthing Is he got caught DMing
Minors Sexual stuff.
Call of Duty out here.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
I saw his big long post On TikTok.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Where he was like yeah, exactly what it was.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Were there things said yeah, there was.
Am I a pedophile?
Nope, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
I have no idea who this man is, but he looks stupid
.
It's probably for the best thatyou keep it.
It doesn't matter.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Anyway you got a live stream.
You go into the bathroom.
I'll fucking do this.
I don't care, I'd do this forlike 50 bucks.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
I'll give a shit.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Honestly, fuck it, I would do it too.
I'll sell tickets to the lights.
Not only that, but it doesn'tconstitute saying I can't put a
little mini wall up over mycrotchal area.
It never says that.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
So I'm fucking in.
I wouldn't even do that.
I don't fucking care.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
I'll beat off while I'm taking a shit and you can
watch.
Let's go.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
If you want to watch me take a pee, that's on you.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
And pay me for it.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
I know, why you're here, then we are starting an
OnlyFans.
Is that what I'm hearing?
I'm in.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
I'd do it.
It's just videos of me peeing.
Speaker 3 (23:48):
Me just blasting shits all the time.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
I'd do it for money.
So we're all doing it.
A million dollars, that's worthit.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
A million dollars.
Everybody gets to see how manytimes I shit in a day.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
Everyone's happy in this situation If you're tuning
in and it says it's livestreamed, it doesn't say that
anyone's forced to watch it.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
So the people who are choosing to watch this live
stream want to see you go to thebathroom your mom has to watch
it or like every time you shitit was in front of a live
audience or something like afull live audience, like with a
laugh track.
I would probably every time youfart, the laugh track goes off
(24:33):
and you're like yeah, I mightactually.
Where can I get this?
Every time you fart, the laughtrack goes off and you're like
yeah, I might actually eatmyself.
Where can I get this?
Speaker 1 (24:41):
You have a knife attached to your hand at all
times.
Actually, this has machete, soyou have a machete just attached
to your hand.
Speaker 3 (24:48):
Like Edward Forty hands, but they taped a fucking
machete to your hand.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
I'm assuming that this is like a machete and the
handle has been duct tapedaround your hand.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
I'm assuming that this is like a machete and like
the handle has been like ducttaped around your arm.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Some guns akimbo.
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Oh, my god, yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
I'm going to say no, no, because this is going to
make holding my child way morecomplicated.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
I haven't thought about Edward Fortyhands.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
I haven't played Edward Fortyhands since I was
like I drink so much.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
They call me Edward Fortyhands.
I've never played this, I knowit, but I've never played it,
don't you think?
Speaker 3 (25:23):
Hollywood Undead?
Yeah, no, I don't think I'mgood on this one.
There's too many things thatcan go wrong with anyone that I
am close with in my life, justbeing around other people, being
around myself.
I sleep like a jackass, so like.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Just rolling around in your sleep?
And what about if you have togo through security?
Speaker 3 (25:49):
Oh, you can't fly ever.
Yeah, you couldn't do almostanything.
This is a hard, no, yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
I'm saying no, no, no .
Speaker 2 (25:56):
TSA agent.
You don't understand.
I got a million dollars forthis.
Speaker 3 (26:01):
I have to do this.
I for sure ain't getting intoDisney with a machete hand.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
Just disguise it with a foam finger or something.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
It was a million who's making the money?
The monetary decisions forthese from now on for the rest
of your life.
You are the world's biggestJustin Bieber fan yeah, fine,
whatever, sure he makes finemusic.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
I feel like I'd be enjoying it, whatever, if you
all of a sudden became hisbiggest like I'd be enjoying it
whatever, if you all of a suddenbecame his biggest fan, you'd
be like fuck yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
I just got money all of a sudden, you wouldn't care,
I feel like why wasn't I doingthis before, exactly?
A million dollars fine,whatever.
Speaker 3 (26:49):
Or is anybody keeping tab if Justin?
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Bieber wants to pay me a million.
If Justin Bieber wants to payme a million dollars, yeah fine,
whatever.
Or is anybody keeping tabs?
If Justin Bieber wants to payme a million?
If Justin Bieber wants to payme a million dollars To pretend
to be his biggest fan, I woulddo it.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
I like how this portrays that this is so bad of
a thing that you have to be paidmillions of dollars To do it.
Just to be a fan of an artist.
What does that say about JustinBieber, his wife's pregnant
Preganinan?
Speaker 1 (27:14):
He's married.
He sure is.
Un pregunta Can I be preganinan?
You have an evil twin.
He looks exactly like you andpeople think you're him.
His only goal, though, is tofuck you over.
He's going to fuck yourgirlfriend and fuck up your work
.
Speaker 3 (27:34):
It specifically says that he's going to fuck your
girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Big old no on this guy.
Can I kill him?
Am I allowed?
Speaker 1 (27:43):
to kill him.
That's fair.
Do people know?
Does he have his own identity?
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yeah, is his name like fucking Rob.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Well, it says people think you're him, so it seems
like You've been usurped Likeyour own identity has been taken
from you.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
The crown has been stolen.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Well, if we think, about the classic trope Of an
evil twin.
Usually it's someone that lookslike you, who is evil?
Speaker 2 (28:11):
That nobody rooftop, that nobody knows Going?
I'm the real one.
I'm the real one.
And then they're like ask mesomething.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
Yeah, ask me something, only I would know.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
And then they trick them.
Speaker 3 (28:21):
Um, but yeah.
So usually in these situationsan evil twin connotates that
everybody knows you and doesn'tknow that you have an evil twin.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
I think you are the evil twin in this situation,
except you are the good twin.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Yeah, he's been fucking up for a while and
you're trying to make it better.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
You can't establish your own identity is what it
makes it seem like.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
You're trying to steal his identity and make it
better.
Is that what I'm getting?
Speaker 1 (28:50):
I guess that's kind of the way this is worded.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
I'm going to go with.
No, that's too exhausting.
Yeah, I already hate.
Plus, it says, like you said inthe beginning, it sounds like
you don't have the identity.
It sounds like he has theidentity, but then it mentions
that he's fucking my girlfriend.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
And my job.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
So, I do have an identity.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Right, yeah, you have these things and they're yours,
otherwise it would just be hisgirlfriend.
Well, that's what.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
I'm saying that's why I think people don't realize
that you have an evil twin.
So he's kind of fucking you up,yeah, in your dailies.
Speaker 2 (29:24):
I'm going to go with.
No, that's too exhausting.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Especially like it just depends no, if I can't
murder them, yes, if I can.
If I can fight my evil twin.
We've got to come up with acode word.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
What do you think the fallout is when the police find
a dead body that is you, butyou're still alive.
How do you think that goes?
Speaker 3 (29:45):
I'd be like I don't know.
He spooked me.
Never seen this man in my life,I mean.
But like what do?
Speaker 1 (29:52):
they do.
Can they charge you for murderfor someone who doesn't have
their own identity?
Speaker 2 (29:56):
yes, I don't know.
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
I mean, I guess, I guess they would just make the
assumption that they were ahidden identical twin and you
killed them like a crime ofpassion, sort of thing like we
two people have been living asone person our entire lives,
which is interesting.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Very symbiotic.
I don't know if anybody's everdone that.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I feel like that doesn't matter.
We're getting way off track.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
Are we doing this?
Speaker 1 (30:23):
I think nobody was agreeing to this right, yeah, no
.
Two million dollars, yeah, no,just based on.
I have one single person who'sspending their entire existence
trying to ruin my life.
Speaker 3 (30:37):
I already have one of those, so same for the next 5
years.
Speaker 1 (30:46):
Any movie only stars people that you know.
That'd be funny.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
I was disassociating.
What happened For the next fiveyears?
Any movie only stars peoplethat you know.
Sure, That'd be funny.
I was disassociating.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (30:59):
For the next five years, every movie that comes
out only stars people that youknow.
It didn't say TV shows, so I'mgood yeah 100%.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Sure, yeah, I don't really watch movies anyway, and
I think this would be hilariousbecause I don't know anybody
who's good at it.
Speaker 3 (31:07):
Yeah, it's fine.
This would be hilarious,because I don't know anybody
who's good at it.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
You haven't seen me act.
Actually you have.
I take that back.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
Shit, I'm bad.
Why is the water blue?
Speaker 3 (31:20):
Yeah, I'll take that, me thinking about Matt falling
face first into a tub again.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
Who did that?
That was in camera.
That wasn't CG.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
Ladies and gentlemen, yeah, we don't have that every
time you fart spontaneously, anentire parade shows up to
celebrate your fart holy shit,that would I.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
I that'd be funny.
Yeah, I'm in, it'd be funny,but I fart.
I would be so annoyed all thetime.
I'd just be like I'd be in bedand then I'd like you know, and
then fucking.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
And you'd be like son of a fuck.
Do they come into your house orwhatever building you're in?
Speaker 2 (32:00):
Are they outside and you just hear them.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
They come out of your butt.
You fart them out of your butt,okay.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
I'm just imagining you just sitting in bed and you
just fart and you just see theconfetti gun go off and the big
ol' symbols guy just yeah, fuckit.
I could use some adventure likethis in my life.
That'd be hilarious.
Speaker 3 (32:20):
Nah, I'd be farting too much for this to make sense.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
I think this is everybody else's problem.
I'm not.
What happens if it's a placethat's inaccessible?
What if you're in the middle ofa transatlantic flight?
Speaker 2 (32:38):
You just murdered a bunch of fucking parade people.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
They just fall out of the sky and drown to death.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
They come out of the bathroom like a clown car.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
There's like 19 band members that come out of this
tiny air I almost want to dothis just to, just to
intentionally fart in differentsituations and see how the
universe what if you farted?
Speaker 3 (32:57):
yeah, what if you like?
Fart on a roller coaster you'regoing down and they just spawn
and just drop yeah, I'm doingthat 100 no, I'm not because I'd
be, just I'd kill myself, butlike uh, yeah on the I'm still
on the plane.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
One, you fart and they occupy the empty seats that
weren't filled in, yet theyjust pop into it.
There's just random bandmembers all over the flight one
of the pilots called in sick.
There's just one and theco-pilot just becomes A marching
band member.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Great Doing it 3 million dollars.
Are we tied now?
Is that what's?
Speaker 1 (33:42):
happening, I don't know at this point.
20% of the time when you throwsomething away, it flies back
into your face 20% of the time.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
I remember this one.
I think you asked, or I askedlast time do I have the ability
to react, or is it like instant?
Like if I see it coming I'd belike whoa and dodge it, because
if it's 20 of the time, like you, you would be able to kind of
calculate a little bit like allright, I'm, this is my second
thing I'm throwing out, so thisis the odds of it about to fly
(34:19):
back at me.
Let's get ready.
You throw it in the trash.
You're just like ready for it.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
So where does it come like?
Speaker 2 (34:25):
from behind and front like I imagine it just like
rebounds back.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Like a fucking boomerang.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
I'm imagining, as soon as you let go of it, it
launches into your face.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
You can kind of feel it out, you know, kind of open
your hand about it Throwbackwards and then just grab
again real quick.
Speaker 1 (34:50):
But does it then count as a separate try whenever
you let go of it again?
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I don't know.
I would do this only becausethere's plenty of loopholes,
like, for example, if you eat athome, if I eat at home, hey
Lori, can you throw this awayfor me?
Boom, I don't have to worryabout it.
If I'm going out to eat, I'mnot throwing away the food.
Speaker 3 (35:12):
Yes, I'm into it, not throwing away the food I yes.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
I mean, does handing off to someone to throw away
also count as throwing away?
No, because I'm not throwing itaway.
I'm not throwing it away.
I'm done with the meal.
What they do with the plateafterwards is their problem, not
mine.
Speaker 1 (35:22):
They could eat the rest hey, laurie, take this and
do what you want with it,don't't throw it away.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
I'm going to leave this right here on the counter.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
And if it happens to disappear, that's your choice.
Speaker 2 (35:37):
Yeah, I'm into it.
There's plenty of ways to workaround this.
I could give shit to my child.
Hey, throw this away for DadaGone.
And then boom knife in the face.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
Here, throw away this knife.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
my child, Throw away this loaded gun.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
I wouldn't shoot you, it would just clock you in the
dome With the fucking gum.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
It comes back to me.
She goes to throw it away,boomerangs back, it clocks me in
the jaw.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
I'm thinking about like there's a lot of situations
where I have a bunch of shitthat is heavy, like metal stuff,
that I have somebody come takeaway like a junk removal service
.
So are they going to be drivingdown the road and then like
half that shit's going to comeback flying back out of the
truck, oh, ooh, and like Ooh,maybe, or again is that somebody
(36:31):
else?
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Is it every single little piece of trash counts as
one piece or is the whole thing?
Like, for example, if I'mthrowing away a McDonald's bag
and it's got like wrappers in it?
Speaker 3 (36:40):
is each individual wrapper Only the McChicken
wrapper is going to come back atyou.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
Yeah, I think I'm out on this one, I'm in Hit me Two
million.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Okay, okay.
Some of these next ones I'mstarting to recognize.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
Well, we're at about 40 minutes.
We'll do a few more.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
A couple, two, three, four, five.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
Here's a group of three that I haven't seen before
, so we'll do these real quickFor the rest of your, For the
rest of your life, when you seean unfinished drink you have to
drink it.
Speaker 2 (37:21):
No, that's disgusting .
Uh-uh.
I'm out Because, like I've beento, I've been to IHOPs before
and I've seen the cup, cup ofhalf drink cold coffee sitting
there on the table and it's likeI that's not what I'm worried
about.
Speaker 1 (37:36):
I'm more worried about like you ever walk down
the street in like a dirty cityand there's just a cup of
whatever like yeah, like waterbottles with cigarettes put out
in them I'm out.
Or like I'm out absolutely not.
No, this is how you get diseaseand poison.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
And imagine being at a restaurant.
Because a restaurant, peoplecome and go.
You see waitstaff taking drinksall the fucking time from
tables.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
So the entire time you're trying to enjoy your
romantic dinner, you're havingto stand up and walk across the
table.
Speaker 3 (38:08):
I'm out.
I missed it.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
For the rest of your life.
When you see an unfinisheddrink, you have to drink it.
Speaker 3 (38:18):
That's how you get roofied.
Speaker 2 (38:21):
That is how you also get roofied, you're right.
Speaker 1 (38:24):
What if you're at an event and you go to throw your
beer can away and you're nowstanding over a large trash bin
of half-empty beer cans?
Are you just going to have tosit there for like 45 minutes
and just?
Speaker 2 (38:40):
Also imagine you throwing a party and the day the
morning after, when you'recleaning up, you have to drink
all those.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
You wake up hungover and now you're just pounding all
these.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
You're pounding whatever concoction is in front
of you.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
No, I'm out.
I'm out too Hell, no, not achance that was a million
dollars.
Absolutely not worth it.
Every day, for the rest of yourlife, you are haunted by a
different historical figure.
I'm taking it.
Speaker 3 (39:09):
Yeah, I think I'd do it too, is it?
Speaker 2 (39:11):
like a scary haunt, or he's just like four scores
and seven years ago I think it.
Speaker 1 (39:15):
I think it depends on who it is, you know this is a
great play but, one like one,one day you get robin williams,
the next is hitler.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
You just you don't know it goes from it goes from
robin williams just hey, I wasin Aladdin, isn't that funny.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
Oh, look at me, look at me, and then just what would
be worse is if people can seethe spectre.
So you're just like at work andpeople are like, is that?
Speaker 3 (39:46):
He's not with me, but he is, but I didn't choose this
.
How often do you?
Speaker 1 (39:51):
say this happens Every single day, no god no, but
he is, but I didn't choose this.
He's like yeah, yeah, justignore him.
How often do you say thishappens?
Speaker 2 (39:56):
Every single day, no, god, no, that's way.
Imagine you wouldn't have anytime to yourself.
Or like, no, fuck, no.
If it was like once a week,yeah, but every day, no, I'm out
.
I don't know, that'd be cool.
They can't do anything.
They're a goat poltergeist.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
Didn't say a poltergeist.
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Again, it depends on who it is right.
I'm gonna say 90% of thesepeople are just gonna be like
Chilling, it's just a differentroommate, ghostly roommate.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
I guess you could also probably distract them,
like if fucking GeorgeWashington was haunting you.
One day, be like, try thisDorito.
Speaker 3 (40:32):
And they're like holy shit, you'd kill him again.
Flavor, blast his ass back tothe fucking.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
I think this would be a lot of fun for like the first
six months, and then I wouldget really old.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
Try the skittle, you ain't ever ever had flavor like
this boy.
I would blast his ass back tohell that's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (41:09):
I don't know.
Part of me wants to say yes, Iknow part of me is like this is
the rest of your life especiallyif you get like a I don't know
Part of me wants to say yes, Iknow Part of me is like this is
the rest of your life.
Speaker 3 (41:15):
Especially if you get like a I don't know.
There's a lot of different.
You know he said poltergeist,so like there's different types
of specters, but it'd be reallybad if some thing was, like you
know, actually terrorizing yourmind.
It's hard to talk about thiswith Giggles McGee over here,
but I think I'm actually.
(41:35):
I probably my heart says yes,but my brain is like, nah,
that's not a good idea.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
I would do this for six months.
But I'm not going to do it forsix months.
Speaker 3 (41:47):
If it was, like he said, a once a week or once a
month thing, probably, yeah,that'd be way different.
Speaker 1 (41:53):
Try this.
Speaker 2 (41:53):
Dorito.
Speaker 1 (41:57):
That was two million dollars.
Speaker 2 (41:59):
You just have a bag of Doritos on the ready at all
times.
Speaker 3 (42:02):
Hell yeah, you fucking gotta be ready for
ghosts, brother.
Speaker 1 (42:08):
For the next five.
I'm gonna wait on Mike.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
He over here crying and shit.
I can see water on his shirtnow.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
This is the way you try this Dorito.
Like you're the spokespersonfor this Doritos, go ahead, I'm
good.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Okay, this is the last one.
For the next five years youhave a 24-7 Permanent hype man,
but he's very bad at his job.
Speaker 3 (42:37):
Yes, that's hilarious .
Speaker 2 (42:42):
Yeah, that could be free.
That's funny, I don't even care.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
You said for the next five years yeah.
I Bad in what way?
Like instead of.
Instead of hyping me up, is heconstantly just being like you
know he's got this weird Thing.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Well, if he's hyping you up.
I think it's just in like a badway.
Where he's like Maybe he'susing the wrong Words.
Where like, for example, for me, because I have my child, like
I'd be like introduced Someonebe like yeah, this is Mike, he
loves kids, he's a kid lover.
Speaker 3 (43:19):
It's like I have a daughter.
That's what he means.
I'm getting like the vibes Likehe'd be like someone Like Jeff
Probst, where like he's likekind of trying to hype people up
but he's really just like kindof like Sort of talking shit
about everyone In like a niceway.
Speaker 1 (43:37):
That's kind of what I was thinking like he has a huge
dick but he's got herpes, buthey, it's big, he's pumping, but
he's losing steam.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
Real quick there.
Yeah, I mean I think I'm intoit, just because, like, I'm
trying to think of like reallybad areas where this would
really affect you, like a, likea job interview or something
it's all right, buddy, thisisn't going great, but you're
hanging in there and when we sayhype man, are we talking like
(44:08):
like a rapper hype man, wherehe's just like it's your boy and
he's like screaming andannouncing to everybody?
are you talking like a boxerhype man, where he's just like
it's your boy and he's likescreaming and announcing to
everybody?
Are you talking like a boxerhype man where he's like
massaging you, whispering inyour ear like yeah, you're not
gonna get it, but you tried yourbest and that's what counts?
Speaker 1 (44:19):
you know like I'm imagining like dj cal rapper
like the guy yeah, a guy juststanding behind you the whole
time, just be like yeah, get 100.
Speaker 2 (44:28):
I'm in that's.
That's hilarious.
I want I'd do that for free.
If someone offered to do thatfor me right now, I wouldn't let
them.
Speaker 3 (44:35):
I can't immediately come to terms with.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
Can't immediately come that sucks, he can't come.
Speaker 3 (44:42):
I can't immediately think of anything that would
make this the worst thing ever,I guess.
So I guess I'd do it.
Speaker 1 (44:49):
It is only five years , it's not the rest of your life
.
Speaker 3 (44:52):
So I guess I'd do it.
It is only five years.
Yeah, it's not the rest of yourlife.
It's a lifestyle change forsure, but it's five years that
I'm willing to pay for that muchmoney.
Speaker 2 (45:03):
I'm just imagining having to do everything with
this obnoxious person justyelling.
Yeah, I'm trying to imaginelike you're going to a funeral
for a distant relative orsomething and you're there and
then he just kicks in the door.
He's like, like it's your boy,mike.
He showed up, but he's onlyhere because he felt obligated
by the rest of the family yeah,that's what I'm afraid of.
Speaker 1 (45:24):
I'm saying no, I'm still in it 100%.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
I think I'm gonna be in it too.
Speaker 2 (45:29):
Can I talk to him be like hey, not like that, don't
do it Punch him in the throat.
Shut up Whenever he comes in.
Just Two million dollars.
Damn, I'm rich after this.
All it cost me was a lot ofconvenient things in my life.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
Alright.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
What are we looking at, tally-wise?
Speaker 1 (45:51):
I'm working.
Speaker 2 (45:51):
Alright, mr Tally man , tally me banana Come.
Have you seen those cyberpunkMemes when it's Keanu Reeves and
he's like I thought you wouldnever come and then it just like
freezes in?
That's the music.
Speaker 3 (46:11):
Have you seen those?
Speaker 2 (46:12):
I don't think so, alright, I'll show you.
I fucking love them.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
If my calculations are correct, I'm in last with 10
.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
Still good money.
Speaker 1 (46:22):
And in second place is Doug with 12 and Mike takes
it with 15.
Speaker 3 (46:28):
Hey, mike's life sucks.
Speaker 2 (46:31):
It does, but I'm here for it.
Speaker 3 (46:32):
But he's got $15 million.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
I'm here for this.
Speaker 3 (46:39):
Oh, fuck, it All right.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Is that the end of the episode?
Speaker 2 (46:47):
Yeah, Sorry, but that's just like immediately
half the things you say, I thinkof that.
I think it's funny, but yeah,that is the episode.
Dad, dad, dad, dad, sorry weforgot that part.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
We never also introduced it.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
This was the bonus, as you know.
Speaker 3 (47:02):
You're listening to a bonus.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
Welcome to dad.
Goodbye to dad, welcome toreally tall podcast.
Speaker 1 (47:12):
We've got to bring Really Tall Podcast back.
Speaker 2 (47:14):
That was great.
Yeah, we did All right.
Well, thanks for tuning ineverybody, and we promise Well,
I shouldn't make a promise, butthis one will hopefully be out
on time.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
I mean, what's time anymore?
Right?
We had released two episodesthis month.
We released three this monthand the months before.
Speaker 2 (47:32):
We put out three.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
Oh, we did.
I think in the descriptions itdoes say Some amount Of bonus
episodes.
Speaker 2 (47:43):
Legally, we are holding up our end of the
bargain.
That could be none that couldbe a lot.
Speaker 3 (47:49):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (47:51):
Thank you everybody for tuning in.
Speaker 1 (47:53):
Really love that um have a nice rest of your day.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
Really love that and hope you played along and you
won money.
Uh, message us what your sum up, your total, and message us
what your total is if you beatmy 15 mil.
Um, let us know.
Send us a message in patreon oruh uh, email or text or
whatever, and uh or socials orwhatever.
That'd be fun.
Let us know.
Bye, goodbye, goodbye.
Speaker 3 (48:15):
Goodbye.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
Don't look under the internet after dark.
Thank you.
Don't look under the internet after dark my, I found
(00:37):
out.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
well, I didn't just find this out, but uh, my, uh,
my tism is, and I think Imentioned this to you guys
before too.
I have a near perfect accuracywhenever any movie has come out
Ever.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I'm pretty damn good at guessing when a movie came
out.
How large is the collection ofmovies?
You know when it came out,though.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Well, I don't know.
That's what I'm saying.
I'll just guess.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
If you just say a movie, there's a good chance
that you're going to guess itwhen it came out.
Speaker 2 (01:10):
As long as I know the movie you can't be like.
What about Hillbilly Bumshack?
I haven't heard of it, so Idon't fucking know If it's a
movie I've heard of Sounds likea porno not a movie no, not a
movie, hillbilly bum.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
I'm gonna do the same thing with video games so I get
it.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
No, no, I'm good um, anyway, wow fun, wow.
So the topic today is a thingthat mike and I have done a
couple of times on various formsof podcasts.
Um, and it is something thatwas stolen from another podcast
and actually I don't rememberwhat podcast it's from at this
point.
I think it is something thatwas stolen from another podcast
and actually I don't rememberwhat podcast it's from at this
point.
I think it was something thatwas.
I think it was a Rooster Teeththing, maybe the Rooster Teeth
(01:51):
podcast, but they don't existanymore, so fuck them.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Their ideas are our ideas now.
Speaker 1 (01:56):
Yeah, and it's in a spreadsheet and it's called A
Million Dollars, but and so,basically, how this works is I
read out a hypothetical scenario, and this is a hypothetical
scenario that you then have tolive with for the rest of your
life.
But in exchange, you may begetting either two million
(02:17):
dollars, a million dollars,three million dollars or nothing
$3 million or nothing.
So you have to be, you have tohear this hypothetical situation
and then decide whether you'rewilling to take the gamble that
you will get one of thoseamounts of money in return.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Okay so.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
And then I'll tell you how much money it was, and
then I'm going to total up youand Mike at the end and we'll
see who won the most money bywilling to do awful things to
them.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Oh, you're not going to play it.
Speaker 1 (02:52):
Okay, okay, I will.
We've done that in the past.
I've got to cover up theamounts.
Speaker 2 (02:59):
Just put a piece of paper on that side of the
monitor.
You know, do it these days.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Put your hand up.
Okay, I'm already blind in oneof them there you go.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
Oh, one eye, one out with it, oh me I just had lisa
watch that movie for the firsttime goonies, and like I haven't
watched it in fucking years Ilove goonies.
It used to be my like staystay-home-from-school sick movie
.
It was my sister's too.
She owns on DVD.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
She said the same thing Last time I saw it was
when our park district would dolike movies.
At the park you could just gofor free and just watch a
fucking movie.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Cool, okay, so Neat.
I Okay Neat, I'm happy for youOur first hypothetical situation
and again you have an equalchance of getting $3 million, $2
million, $1 million or nothing.
Every time you have a veryimportant decision, you have to
act it out to other people as amime.
(04:00):
So basically, anytime you'retrying to make an important
decision, you have to mime it.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Oh, we're starting.
This is the situation.
Yeah, gotcha this is thesituation.
Yeah, I mean, that seems notterribly bad, because I fucking
talk with my hands as it is.
Speaker 1 (04:17):
This is for the rest of your life.
You can't talk, though that'sthe thing I think, the downside
of this is you can't getfeedback by talking with someone
.
Every time you have to make animportant decision, you have to
act it out to other people as amime.
So basically, you can't talkthrough important decisions with
other people If you are like,hey, you want to have a baby.
(04:40):
You can't be like, hey, let'sdiscuss that you gotta be.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
like let's discuss that you gotta be like yeah, no,
no, this, this might, thismight come in handy.
You can be like I'm really I'mtrying to have this conversation
with you, but I cannot tell youwhat I'm thinking I, I can only
see this you could just shutpeople down, like not right now,
it's just too much.
Speaker 2 (04:59):
I can only see this going bad, especially if you're
trying to like refinance amortgage or right, or like
imagine, trying to like, imaginebeing at an auction.
You can't, you just raise yourhand.
Oh, that's right.
Yeah, actually, that worked outpretty well for you, never mind
.
Oh well, I don't know.
I don't know.
I think that one is too notworth it.
(05:20):
I need to talk.
Yeah, I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1 (05:21):
Can you even explain the situation to people before
it starts happening, like if?
Can you even explain thesituation to people before it
starts happening, if you justend up in a situation where you
suddenly have to make animportant decision with somebody
else and they don't know thatthis is a thing?
Speaker 2 (05:32):
What if you're over the phone as well?
What if you're having to make adecision?
Speaker 1 (05:35):
about your 401k.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
You're not going to go see an actual person, you're
talking on the phone.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
In the age of emails and zoom calls.
It's possible, yeah, but whatif somebody calls you and
there's like there's animportant?
Decision you need to make rightthis second I mean, you can't
really do anything about that ifit's over the phone or if it's
like, they're like, hey, you'dbe like yeah, what if they're
like, hey, should we pull yourwife off of life support?
Speaker 3 (06:05):
I mean you can shake your head, yes or no to that one
, I think no, no.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
I'm saying like, what if this is over the phone?
What if it has to be over thephone because you can't be there
?
For?
Speaker 3 (06:14):
some.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Well then they probably wouldn't take her off
of life support if you didn'tsay anything on the phone what
if you're in jail and you arethe only person who can make the
decision about whether or notyou should take your wife out
with life support?
I'd be like and they have tocall you.
Speaker 3 (06:30):
Well, you can't make the decision right, you can only
gesture it.
Could you be like?
You have to come and see me,Because that's not making the
decision.
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
There's a lot of.
We're only on question one.
I'm going to say no.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I'm going to go with.
Yes, I have too many retorts.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
Yeah, no, this is terrible.
I'm not doing this one.
Speaker 2 (06:51):
Let's see how much money.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Doug got I want money I want money, I want money.
Alright, Doug got $3 million.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
Hey, retire, I'm done , I'm done.
Retire.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
We're out Florida, I'm done, I'm done retire we're
out Florida, here we go, alright, alright, alright.
So you get the money that youReceive from the.
This is the situation you getthe money that you receive, but
(07:24):
you aren't allowed to spend itas you.
You are given a second identityand you can only use the money
when you are assuming thatidentity.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
That's fine.
Yeah, why?
How does that affect?
Speaker 3 (07:38):
me at all.
I think this needs moreclarification.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
You wouldn't be able to.
Hi, I'm John Smith.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Now I'm going to Zell myself $3 million or Zell
Michael Allen $3 million Done.
Speaker 1 (07:49):
I was going to say you wouldn't be able to take
ownership of anything, youwouldn't be able to buy a house,
and then you own that house,but the other you would.
What is to keep the other youfrom just gifting it?
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Exactly.
Yeah, this is a no-brainer.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Yes, because you can gift anything you want Hi other
me.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
I'm writing Michael a check for $4 million.
Here you go.
That's the only action you needto do.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
Yes, you can gift cars and stuff too yeah this is
yeah that's fine.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
Yeah, I mean this one's pretty no-brainer.
I don't see a downside to this.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Actually, that's great, because people don't even
won't know I have money then.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
How much should we all get off of that bad boy?
A million dollars, I'll take it.
That's the easiest milliondollars I think I've ever come
across.
I could spend that so quick.
You at home listening playalong with us.
Speaker 3 (08:44):
Comment your choice in the comments section, and
then we'll flame you about it.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
Every single time you meet someone new, you have to
hug them for 30 seconds.
Speaker 3 (08:55):
I'm good.
I hate touching people.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Honestly, I'll do it.
30 seconds is a long hug.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
That is a long hug.
I will do it.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
I don't meet that many new people.
I don't even know if I'd wantto do it for 20 seconds.
What are we constitutingmeeting?
If I just accidentally bumpinto someone On the street and
I'm like, oh sorry, do I have tohug them?
Speaker 1 (09:15):
or is it like Hi, I'm so, and so I think there has to
be a formal introduction.
You have to learn their name.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
Yeah, I'll do it.
See me at the fucking KentuckyDerby, hugging people yeah, I'm,
I'm out on that one.
Speaker 1 (09:31):
I don't, I don't want to do that you can even explain
it away as, like I don't knowthis is.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
I'm legally obligated to do this sorry region of.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Canada or something I don't know.
Okay, yeah, I'd do this, dougwouldn't do it.
I'm out.
Speaker 2 (09:47):
A mill, a millie easiest mill, especially like I
mean, maybe not for you guysthis works, but for me.
I just give off that kind ofvibe where oh, I need a hug no,
it's a hug.
I'm a hugger and I think peopleread that from me and I think
they see that I'm an innocentBoy because I look like.
Speaker 1 (10:07):
I'm not a dangerous looking person, so they're like
oh, he wants a hug cool.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
I'm not a man.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
I'm a boy.
I'm a boy.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Every time you go to bed and you wake up.
You wake up in a womb as anadult, naked, and you have to
bed and you wake up.
You wake up in a womb as anadult, naked, and you have to
relive birth Every time you wakeup.
Is this so?
You have to be born everymorning, except you are adult
size.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
That seems so tedious .
Yeah, but Are you fallingasleep in the womb or are you
being transported in it?
Because I won't lie if I fallasleep in that womb, probably
very comfortable because you'rejust floating in liquid and it's
probably very warm.
It probably is very warm andvery nice.
Speaker 1 (10:52):
It says every time you go to bed you wake up in a
womb.
So I'm assuming you fall asleepin your bed and then you wake
up magically inside a womb.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
Is it?
Well?
I guess there's.
I have a couple questions thatI don't know if we have the
answer to.
Is it painful, or is it justyou slip and slide?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
right out.
Am I coming right out of mymother again?
Or is it just a giant wombappears in my bed and I just
kind of have to fight through it?
Yeah, that's the thing.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Is this like an actual normal-sized woman, where
this is definitely going tokill you?
Speaker 3 (11:20):
You kill a lady every morning, or do you come out of
a?
Speaker 2 (11:23):
bed-sized womb and then a giant doctor smacks you
on the ass and sends you on yourway, like some sort of fever
dream.
Speaker 3 (11:30):
Do I have a new room where all the slopping?
Speaker 1 (11:33):
Bandage-real nightmare is what that is.
Is there a new?
Speaker 3 (11:35):
room in my house that accounts for all the slopping
gook that comes out when I'mrebirthed.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
Yeah, or do you have to be cleaning placenta out of
your fucking bedroom?
Speaker 2 (11:44):
I'm going to go with no because this is really going
to harsh some intimacy in thebedroom with my wife.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
Can you imagine going on like a first date with
someone and you just fall asleepin their bed and they just wake
up somewhere in their house andyou're like oh fuck.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
Yeah, you can't stay the night anywhere because
they're going to wonder whereyou just vanished to.
I need to know where thatteleports you to, because what
if you're on vacation?
I'm going to say you don't getteleported.
A womb develops around youwhere you are and it just
fucking.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
Oh yeah, which is like a weird group, yeah.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
I'm going to assume that because if you do get
teleported- and it's not evenattached to a woman.
It's just a floating womb.
It just comes out of you andforms around you like some
fucking.
What's his name?
Hr Giger?
Horror nonsense.
What's the guy that directedthe Fly?
Cronenberg, some Cronenbergianshit.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Yeah, I'm going to say no.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Yeah, I don't think I can.
Speaker 3 (12:42):
No, it's just too much.
I want the money regardless,but I don't think no, there's
this it's just too much.
Like I, I want the moneyregardless, but like I don't
know about that one, that'sthat's you already have like
four mil, I know, yeah.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Yeah, you're good, I know and like I fall asleep a
lot, like I'm I don't be justI'm oh, my god I'm having micro
naps at night with.
I have a kid I like.
What if you fall asleep on thetrain?
Fuck.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
Imagine watching that Some guy falls asleep on the
train and a fucking womb justenvelops, looking like Mothra's
cocoon or something.
Speaker 3 (13:14):
Yeah, you get a lot of great party trick yeah.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Well and I.
So just leave me alone for fiveminutes, You'll see the
craziest shit, you've ever seen.
Speaker 2 (13:21):
You won't you won't see a womb.
This is extra bad for mebecause every weekend I take a
nap, because when Amelia goesdown for her nap, I take a nap.
So this would be happening tome minimum twice a day, nah.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
In a standard night I wake up a couple times and go
pee.
That means I gotta wake up at2am and be pee Same.
So that means I got to wake upat 2 am, be born, pee, go to
sleep, wake up again at like 7,pee, be born, pee.
And then I usually like fromlike 7 to 7.30,.
I just like because I set myalarm for 7, but I'm like I
don't got to be up till 7.30, soI'll lay back down.
(14:00):
Yeah, this is too.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
It's way too much.
It's too much.
Imagine having to be birthedlike three times in the morning.
You're like I'm gonna hit thesnooze real quick.
And you're like, oh okay, well,let me get back into bed real
quick.
Speaker 2 (14:12):
Imagine experiencing that and be like I still got a
couple hours exactly.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
I'm not doing anything, you don't know the
time you're like.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
I don't know if I need to be born, if I can just
wait this out.
Speaker 2 (14:22):
No, I'm going to say no on this one.
Yeah, no, it's a no.
How much money did we lose?
Three mil, it seems like athree mil question.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
oh, good job, not even worth there's no way that
would have been worth alright.
Once a month for a 24 hourperiod of time.
You are at the top of the FBI'smost wanted list.
You don't know the day, but youare given a 3 hour advance
notice and you just have toavoid the I'd do this one.
(14:53):
This actually kind of soundsfun you have to avoid the FBI
for a day, and then I guess theyforget.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Easy.
What are we talking about again?
Midnight Strikes are just like.
What are we doing here?
Why are we in Illinois?
Speaker 3 (15:08):
Yeah, no, fuck it.
I'd do it.
I think that'd be anexhilarating way to live your
life once a month.
What happens if they catch you?
Because then exhilarating wayto live your life once a month.
Speaker 2 (15:16):
What happens if they catch you?
They just forget for a month.
You're in jail and they're likewho are you?
Why are you here?
I don't know.
Remember, this is the FBI.
For a day, you really can't doanything.
That's a day a month.
It's random as well, whichsucks.
It's the FBI.
They'll be tracking your phone.
(15:37):
They'll be using like Well,yeah, you just leave your you
leave everything at home youdon't know when it's going to
happen though, but you get threehours.
Speaker 1 (15:42):
Yeah, so, oh, that's true.
So this, this kind of affectsthe rest of your life, though,
because you are going to have tomake sure that you stay in
situations that you can getyourself out of in three hours
which I don't think would bethat hard.
Speaker 2 (15:57):
I think what you'd want to establish is a good like
a very secluded, hidden bunker,that is, that you no one else
knows about except you and you'dwant to just like what if
you're more than three hoursaway from it?
Just don't be three hours awayI don't go there.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
I don't want.
I don't want to stay withinthree hours of one single
location for my entire life.
I don't do that a month as itis.
Speaker 3 (16:19):
Yeah, that would suck .
It would be like a full-blownlifestyle change, because unless
you're going purge status andbuild a fortress bunker on your
house or something that you canjust be like, oh well, try to
get in suckers Imagine being outto dinner and all of a sudden
you just get this text whereit's like yeah, three hours, do
you just like smash your phoneand just run off into the
(16:42):
wilderness?
Speaker 1 (16:42):
you just throw your steak the thing is, I do
question how difficult it reallyis to evade the FBI for one day
there's people that are on theFBI's most wanted list for a
long time and they're just outliving.
You know what I'm saying likeright, like you, basically just
don't go out in public, don't behome and don't have your cell
(17:05):
phone on.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
Do you think I'll be put on a list if I?
Pull it off for 24 hours if Igoogle how to avoid the FBI, you
think I'm going to be put on alist you google that you're
going to get a 30-hour timer.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Use NordVPN.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
Not a sponsor For the rest of my life.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
I couldn't do this.
That's just going to affect mylife way too much.
I can't do that one.
Speaker 1 (17:29):
I think it sounds fun still.
Speaker 2 (17:30):
You say that until you're 70 having to do this shit
.
And for what?
A mil, nah, I'm good.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
I having to do this shit, and for what?
A mill, nah, I'm good.
Yeah, that's the thing.
It depends on how much moneythis is.
I don't think a million dollarsis going to be worth having to
do this for the rest of my life.
You could use that mill toinvest in whatever bunker or
hideaway plan, but then I'm justnet negative and now I have no
money and now I have to dealwith this.
True.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
So let's say you get three million, you'd have to,
like buy a few houses in likedifferent places so that you
wouldn't have to be three hoursaway from like.
You'd have to be three hoursaway from one of them, obviously
, but like you know, you couldhave your, your summer house and
your whatever, whatever youknow, if you own the houses and
the fbi knows you own the houses, you can't go out, but you
(18:16):
gotta fortify them.
Speaker 1 (18:18):
That's exactly where you don't want to be and you
need to so you're just gonna sitout and like hope that they
can't break through yourdefenses?
Speaker 3 (18:25):
question am I allowed to like?
I feel like that's a fight.
The police on this one like.
Can I like?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
oh, yeah, if you, if you murder a cop like shoot a
cop or they forget it atmidnight.
Speaker 3 (18:34):
You just mow down, they're gonna forget it at
midnight and then you're justgonna have like 20 dead cops on
your lawn and they're gonna belike what happened to?
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Jerry.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
Like I don't know, he died over there, I haven't seen
him in like two days.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
Crazy party.
Speaker 3 (18:54):
I'm gonna say no, I think I'm gonna say no as well.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
3-0 yeah, that sounds right the only thing that I
could I would imagine doing.
I don't really go 3 hours outthat often anyway, I would
probably end up using a goodmill of it or something to like
cut a hole in my basementsomewhere like underneath the
sofa, and I would just make atiny little bunker and be like
Lori, I'll see you in a day andI'll just hang out down there.
(19:21):
Even if they raid my home, whatare the odds they're going to
find it?
Speaker 3 (19:26):
I don't know.
I'm sure there's a Mr Beastvideo about that.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
He does bury himself alive for a week or some shit.
Speaker 3 (19:31):
I think there's legitimately an episode where
he's running from an FBI agent.
So we missed out on 3 mil Damn.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
We missed out on Mr Beast, I don't know.
Knowing that it's $3 million,I'm a little tempted.
Too late now.
Hey, it is too late now.
Okay, your arms are replaced bypuppet arms, like.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Muppet cloth arms Like that are controlled by the
little sticks.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Do I still have, but I don't know who's controlling.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Would I still have full functionality anyway?
Like, would I still be able tograb things, cause Muppets grab
things?
Do I have a grip?
Speaker 3 (20:10):
at all.
Can you control them?
Can I do?
Speaker 2 (20:13):
this?
Can you control them, or is?
Speaker 1 (20:16):
somebody do this.
Can you control them?
Or is somebody else pulling the?
Speaker 3 (20:19):
strings Is this for life.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Yeah, this is for life.
I'm saying no, I don't care If.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
I can control them and I still have maneuverability
.
Speaker 3 (20:31):
I'm in.
I feel like that's.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
The shtick, though, is that you don't I thought the
shtick would be just the factthat they look funny.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
Well, if that's the case, then you take the money.
If you the puppet arms are thesame as my arms just felt, then
I'd do it.
If there's no functionality,then no, I wouldn't do it.
I just straight up imagine likeyour arms.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
I'm imagining them just like hanging.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
I imagine your arms get swapped with, like Kermit
the Frog's arms.
That's what I'm picturing andI'm okay with that.
I would accept that.
I would take it Again if I can,if Like green and everything.
If I have functionality to thearms, I'm doing it.
I'll take it Nope, Are we no?
So for my, for my answer, arewe saying that you keep
functionality or is some?
(21:13):
I don't know?
There's no omnipotent beingcontrolling you with the sticks
underneath.
Speaker 1 (21:19):
Cause it.
I'm going to say you keepfunctionality, but they move
stupid Like oh yeah, I'm in ahundred percent, I'm in.
Speaker 3 (21:25):
That's hilarious yeah no, I guess I'm in then, if
that's the case, as long as Istill have functionality that's
hilarious.
Speaker 2 (21:32):
I'm not doing this.
How much did I win?
Show me.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
Zero dollars.
Speaker 2 (21:36):
Hey Wow, douglas, the frog here.
Speaker 1 (21:42):
It would make sex terrible.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
You just, or maybe it would just make it funny, I'm
coming, wow, hey, I'm coming.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
I'm gonna spoot.
Speaker 1 (21:58):
You know what.
Speaker 2 (21:59):
You talk me into the funniest part is we never
establish that your voicechanges.
But I feel like no, you wouldjust do it Because yeah 100%.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
You gotta match the aesthetic.
This is your personality nowFor the rest of your life.
Anytime you go to the bathroom,it's live streamed.
So basically, dr, disrespect.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
Is that what happened with him?
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Not the most recent thing.
That was the first time he wassuspended.
He's like, the most recentthing Is he got caught DMing
Minors Sexual stuff.
Call of Duty out here.
Speaker 3 (22:41):
I saw his big long post On TikTok.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Where he was like yeah, exactly what it was.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Were there things said yeah, there was.
Am I a pedophile?
Nope, I'm not.
Speaker 2 (22:56):
I have no idea who this man is, but he looks stupid
.
It's probably for the best thatyou keep it.
It doesn't matter.
Speaker 1 (23:03):
Anyway you got a live stream.
You go into the bathroom.
I'll fucking do this.
I don't care, I'd do this forlike 50 bucks.
Speaker 3 (23:08):
I'll give a shit.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Honestly, fuck it, I would do it too.
I'll sell tickets to the lights.
Not only that, but it doesn'tconstitute saying I can't put a
little mini wall up over mycrotchal area.
It never says that.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
So I'm fucking in.
I wouldn't even do that.
I don't fucking care.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
I'll beat off while I'm taking a shit and you can
watch.
Let's go.
Speaker 1 (23:35):
If you want to watch me take a pee, that's on you.
Speaker 2 (23:37):
And pay me for it.
Speaker 3 (23:41):
I know, why you're here, then we are starting an
OnlyFans.
Is that what I'm hearing?
I'm in.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
I'd do it.
It's just videos of me peeing.
Speaker 3 (23:48):
Me just blasting shits all the time.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
I'd do it for money.
So we're all doing it.
A million dollars, that's worthit.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
A million dollars.
Everybody gets to see how manytimes I shit in a day.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
Everyone's happy in this situation If you're tuning
in and it says it's livestreamed, it doesn't say that
anyone's forced to watch it.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
So the people who are choosing to watch this live
stream want to see you go to thebathroom your mom has to watch
it or like every time you shitit was in front of a live
audience or something like afull live audience, like with a
laugh track.
I would probably every time youfart, the laugh track goes off
(24:33):
and you're like yeah, I mightactually.
Where can I get this?
Every time you fart, the laughtrack goes off and you're like
yeah, I might actually eatmyself.
Where can I get this?
Speaker 1 (24:41):
You have a knife attached to your hand at all
times.
Actually, this has machete, soyou have a machete just attached
to your hand.
Speaker 3 (24:48):
Like Edward Forty hands, but they taped a fucking
machete to your hand.
Speaker 1 (24:53):
I'm assuming that this is like a machete and the
handle has been duct tapedaround your hand.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
I'm assuming that this is like a machete and like
the handle has been like ducttaped around your arm.
Speaker 2 (25:00):
Some guns akimbo.
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Oh, my god, yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
I'm going to say no, no, because this is going to
make holding my child way morecomplicated.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
I haven't thought about Edward Fortyhands.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
I haven't played Edward Fortyhands since I was
like I drink so much.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
They call me Edward Fortyhands.
I've never played this, I knowit, but I've never played it,
don't you think?
Speaker 3 (25:23):
Hollywood Undead?
Yeah, no, I don't think I'mgood on this one.
There's too many things thatcan go wrong with anyone that I
am close with in my life, justbeing around other people, being
around myself.
I sleep like a jackass, so like.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
Just rolling around in your sleep?
And what about if you have togo through security?
Speaker 3 (25:49):
Oh, you can't fly ever.
Yeah, you couldn't do almostanything.
This is a hard, no, yeah.
Speaker 1 (25:56):
I'm saying no, no, no .
Speaker 2 (25:56):
TSA agent.
You don't understand.
I got a million dollars forthis.
Speaker 3 (26:01):
I have to do this.
I for sure ain't getting intoDisney with a machete hand.
Speaker 2 (26:06):
Just disguise it with a foam finger or something.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
It was a million who's making the money?
The monetary decisions forthese from now on for the rest
of your life.
You are the world's biggestJustin Bieber fan yeah, fine,
whatever, sure he makes finemusic.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
I feel like I'd be enjoying it, whatever, if you
all of a sudden became hisbiggest like I'd be enjoying it
whatever, if you all of a suddenbecame his biggest fan, you'd
be like fuck yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:35):
I just got money all of a sudden, you wouldn't care,
I feel like why wasn't I doingthis before, exactly?
A million dollars fine,whatever.
Speaker 3 (26:49):
Or is anybody keeping tab if Justin?
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Bieber wants to pay me a million.
If Justin Bieber wants to payme a million dollars, yeah fine,
whatever.
Or is anybody keeping tabs?
If Justin Bieber wants to payme a million?
If Justin Bieber wants to payme a million dollars To pretend
to be his biggest fan, I woulddo it.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
I like how this portrays that this is so bad of
a thing that you have to be paidmillions of dollars To do it.
Just to be a fan of an artist.
What does that say about JustinBieber, his wife's pregnant
Preganinan?
Speaker 1 (27:14):
He's married.
He sure is.
Un pregunta Can I be preganinan?
You have an evil twin.
He looks exactly like you andpeople think you're him.
His only goal, though, is tofuck you over.
He's going to fuck yourgirlfriend and fuck up your work
.
Speaker 3 (27:34):
It specifically says that he's going to fuck your
girlfriend.
Speaker 2 (27:39):
Big old no on this guy.
Can I kill him?
Am I allowed?
Speaker 1 (27:43):
to kill him.
That's fair.
Do people know?
Does he have his own identity?
Speaker 2 (27:50):
Yeah, is his name like fucking Rob.
Speaker 1 (27:52):
Well, it says people think you're him, so it seems
like You've been usurped Likeyour own identity has been taken
from you.
Speaker 2 (28:01):
The crown has been stolen.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
Well, if we think, about the classic trope Of an
evil twin.
Usually it's someone that lookslike you, who is evil?
Speaker 2 (28:11):
That nobody rooftop, that nobody knows Going?
I'm the real one.
I'm the real one.
And then they're like ask mesomething.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
Yeah, ask me something, only I would know.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
And then they trick them.
Speaker 3 (28:21):
Um, but yeah.
So usually in these situationsan evil twin connotates that
everybody knows you and doesn'tknow that you have an evil twin.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
I think you are the evil twin in this situation,
except you are the good twin.
Speaker 2 (28:37):
Yeah, he's been fucking up for a while and
you're trying to make it better.
Speaker 1 (28:43):
You can't establish your own identity is what it
makes it seem like.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
You're trying to steal his identity and make it
better.
Is that what I'm getting?
Speaker 1 (28:50):
I guess that's kind of the way this is worded.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
I'm going to go with.
No, that's too exhausting.
Yeah, I already hate.
Plus, it says, like you said inthe beginning, it sounds like
you don't have the identity.
It sounds like he has theidentity, but then it mentions
that he's fucking my girlfriend.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
And my job.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
So, I do have an identity.
Speaker 1 (29:11):
Right, yeah, you have these things and they're yours,
otherwise it would just be hisgirlfriend.
Well, that's what.
Speaker 3 (29:16):
I'm saying that's why I think people don't realize
that you have an evil twin.
So he's kind of fucking you up,yeah, in your dailies.
Speaker 2 (29:24):
I'm going to go with.
No, that's too exhausting.
Speaker 3 (29:31):
Especially like it just depends no, if I can't
murder them, yes, if I can.
If I can fight my evil twin.
We've got to come up with acode word.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
What do you think the fallout is when the police find
a dead body that is you, butyou're still alive.
How do you think that goes?
Speaker 3 (29:45):
I'd be like I don't know.
He spooked me.
Never seen this man in my life,I mean.
But like what do?
Speaker 1 (29:52):
they do.
Can they charge you for murderfor someone who doesn't have
their own identity?
Speaker 2 (29:56):
yes, I don't know.
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
I mean, I guess, I guess they would just make the
assumption that they were ahidden identical twin and you
killed them like a crime ofpassion, sort of thing like we
two people have been living asone person our entire lives,
which is interesting.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
Very symbiotic.
I don't know if anybody's everdone that.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I feel like that doesn't matter.
We're getting way off track.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
Are we doing this?
Speaker 1 (30:23):
I think nobody was agreeing to this right, yeah, no
.
Two million dollars, yeah, no,just based on.
I have one single person who'sspending their entire existence
trying to ruin my life.
Speaker 3 (30:37):
I already have one of those, so same for the next 5
years.
Speaker 1 (30:46):
Any movie only stars people that you know.
That'd be funny.
Speaker 3 (30:49):
I was disassociating.
What happened For the next fiveyears?
Any movie only stars peoplethat you know.
Sure, That'd be funny.
I was disassociating.
Speaker 1 (30:57):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (30:59):
For the next five years, every movie that comes
out only stars people that youknow.
It didn't say TV shows, so I'mgood yeah 100%.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Sure, yeah, I don't really watch movies anyway, and
I think this would be hilariousbecause I don't know anybody
who's good at it.
Speaker 3 (31:07):
Yeah, it's fine.
This would be hilarious,because I don't know anybody
who's good at it.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
You haven't seen me act.
Actually you have.
I take that back.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
Shit, I'm bad.
Why is the water blue?
Speaker 3 (31:20):
Yeah, I'll take that, me thinking about Matt falling
face first into a tub again.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
Who did that?
That was in camera.
That wasn't CG.
Speaker 1 (31:30):
Ladies and gentlemen, yeah, we don't have that every
time you fart spontaneously, anentire parade shows up to
celebrate your fart holy shit,that would I.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
I that'd be funny.
Yeah, I'm in, it'd be funny,but I fart.
I would be so annoyed all thetime.
I'd just be like I'd be in bedand then I'd like you know, and
then fucking.
Speaker 1 (31:55):
And you'd be like son of a fuck.
Do they come into your house orwhatever building you're in?
Speaker 2 (32:00):
Are they outside and you just hear them.
Speaker 3 (32:02):
They come out of your butt.
You fart them out of your butt,okay.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
I'm just imagining you just sitting in bed and you
just fart and you just see theconfetti gun go off and the big
ol' symbols guy just yeah, fuckit.
I could use some adventure likethis in my life.
That'd be hilarious.
Speaker 3 (32:20):
Nah, I'd be farting too much for this to make sense.
Speaker 1 (32:23):
I think this is everybody else's problem.
I'm not.
What happens if it's a placethat's inaccessible?
What if you're in the middle ofa transatlantic flight?
Speaker 2 (32:38):
You just murdered a bunch of fucking parade people.
Speaker 1 (32:42):
They just fall out of the sky and drown to death.
Speaker 2 (32:44):
They come out of the bathroom like a clown car.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
There's like 19 band members that come out of this
tiny air I almost want to dothis just to, just to
intentionally fart in differentsituations and see how the
universe what if you farted?
Speaker 3 (32:57):
yeah, what if you like?
Fart on a roller coaster you'regoing down and they just spawn
and just drop yeah, I'm doingthat 100 no, I'm not because I'd
be, just I'd kill myself, butlike uh, yeah on the I'm still
on the plane.
Speaker 2 (33:16):
One, you fart and they occupy the empty seats that
weren't filled in, yet theyjust pop into it.
There's just random bandmembers all over the flight one
of the pilots called in sick.
There's just one and theco-pilot just becomes A marching
band member.
Speaker 3 (33:36):
Great Doing it 3 million dollars.
Are we tied now?
Is that what's?
Speaker 1 (33:42):
happening, I don't know at this point.
20% of the time when you throwsomething away, it flies back
into your face 20% of the time.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
I remember this one.
I think you asked, or I askedlast time do I have the ability
to react, or is it like instant?
Like if I see it coming I'd belike whoa and dodge it, because
if it's 20 of the time, like you, you would be able to kind of
calculate a little bit like allright, I'm, this is my second
thing I'm throwing out, so thisis the odds of it about to fly
(34:19):
back at me.
Let's get ready.
You throw it in the trash.
You're just like ready for it.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
So where does it come like?
Speaker 2 (34:25):
from behind and front like I imagine it just like
rebounds back.
Speaker 3 (34:30):
Like a fucking boomerang.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
I'm imagining, as soon as you let go of it, it
launches into your face.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
You can kind of feel it out, you know, kind of open
your hand about it Throwbackwards and then just grab
again real quick.
Speaker 1 (34:50):
But does it then count as a separate try whenever
you let go of it again?
Speaker 2 (34:54):
I don't know.
I would do this only becausethere's plenty of loopholes,
like, for example, if you eat athome, if I eat at home, hey
Lori, can you throw this awayfor me?
Boom, I don't have to worryabout it.
If I'm going out to eat, I'mnot throwing away the food.
Speaker 3 (35:12):
Yes, I'm into it, not throwing away the food I yes.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
I mean, does handing off to someone to throw away
also count as throwing away?
No, because I'm not throwing itaway.
I'm not throwing it away.
I'm done with the meal.
What they do with the plateafterwards is their problem, not
mine.
Speaker 1 (35:22):
They could eat the rest hey, laurie, take this and
do what you want with it,don't't throw it away.
Speaker 3 (35:28):
I'm going to leave this right here on the counter.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
And if it happens to disappear, that's your choice.
Speaker 2 (35:37):
Yeah, I'm into it.
There's plenty of ways to workaround this.
I could give shit to my child.
Hey, throw this away for DadaGone.
And then boom knife in the face.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
Here, throw away this knife.
Speaker 2 (35:48):
my child, Throw away this loaded gun.
Speaker 3 (35:54):
I wouldn't shoot you, it would just clock you in the
dome With the fucking gum.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
It comes back to me.
She goes to throw it away,boomerangs back, it clocks me in
the jaw.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
I'm thinking about like there's a lot of situations
where I have a bunch of shitthat is heavy, like metal stuff,
that I have somebody come takeaway like a junk removal service
.
So are they going to be drivingdown the road and then like
half that shit's going to comeback flying back out of the
truck, oh, ooh, and like Ooh,maybe, or again is that somebody
(36:31):
else?
Speaker 2 (36:33):
Is it every single little piece of trash counts as
one piece or is the whole thing?
Like, for example, if I'mthrowing away a McDonald's bag
and it's got like wrappers in it?
Speaker 3 (36:40):
is each individual wrapper Only the McChicken
wrapper is going to come back atyou.
Speaker 2 (36:43):
Yeah, I think I'm out on this one, I'm in Hit me Two
million.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Okay, okay.
Some of these next ones I'mstarting to recognize.
Speaker 3 (37:02):
Well, we're at about 40 minutes.
We'll do a few more.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
A couple, two, three, four, five.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
Here's a group of three that I haven't seen before
, so we'll do these real quickFor the rest of your, For the
rest of your life, when you seean unfinished drink you have to
drink it.
Speaker 2 (37:21):
No, that's disgusting .
Uh-uh.
I'm out Because, like I've beento, I've been to IHOPs before
and I've seen the cup, cup ofhalf drink cold coffee sitting
there on the table and it's likeI that's not what I'm worried
about.
Speaker 1 (37:36):
I'm more worried about like you ever walk down
the street in like a dirty cityand there's just a cup of
whatever like yeah, like waterbottles with cigarettes put out
in them I'm out.
Or like I'm out absolutely not.
No, this is how you get diseaseand poison.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
And imagine being at a restaurant.
Because a restaurant, peoplecome and go.
You see waitstaff taking drinksall the fucking time from
tables.
Speaker 1 (38:02):
So the entire time you're trying to enjoy your
romantic dinner, you're havingto stand up and walk across the
table.
Speaker 3 (38:08):
I'm out.
I missed it.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
For the rest of your life.
When you see an unfinisheddrink, you have to drink it.
Speaker 3 (38:18):
That's how you get roofied.
Speaker 2 (38:21):
That is how you also get roofied, you're right.
Speaker 1 (38:24):
What if you're at an event and you go to throw your
beer can away and you're nowstanding over a large trash bin
of half-empty beer cans?
Are you just going to have tosit there for like 45 minutes
and just?
Speaker 2 (38:40):
Also imagine you throwing a party and the day the
morning after, when you'recleaning up, you have to drink
all those.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
You wake up hungover and now you're just pounding all
these.
Speaker 2 (38:51):
You're pounding whatever concoction is in front
of you.
Speaker 1 (38:54):
No, I'm out.
I'm out too Hell, no, not achance that was a million
dollars.
Absolutely not worth it.
Every day, for the rest of yourlife, you are haunted by a
different historical figure.
I'm taking it.
Speaker 3 (39:09):
Yeah, I think I'd do it too, is it?
Speaker 2 (39:11):
like a scary haunt, or he's just like four scores
and seven years ago I think it.
Speaker 1 (39:15):
I think it depends on who it is, you know this is a
great play but, one like one,one day you get robin williams,
the next is hitler.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
You just you don't know it goes from it goes from
robin williams just hey, I wasin Aladdin, isn't that funny.
Speaker 1 (39:32):
Oh, look at me, look at me, and then just what would
be worse is if people can seethe spectre.
So you're just like at work andpeople are like, is that?
Speaker 3 (39:46):
He's not with me, but he is, but I didn't choose this
.
How often do you?
Speaker 1 (39:51):
say this happens Every single day, no god no, but
he is, but I didn't choose this.
He's like yeah, yeah, justignore him.
How often do you say thishappens?
Speaker 2 (39:56):
Every single day, no, god, no, that's way.
Imagine you wouldn't have anytime to yourself.
Or like, no, fuck, no.
If it was like once a week,yeah, but every day, no, I'm out
.
I don't know, that'd be cool.
They can't do anything.
They're a goat poltergeist.
Speaker 3 (40:11):
Didn't say a poltergeist.
Speaker 1 (40:13):
Again, it depends on who it is right.
I'm gonna say 90% of thesepeople are just gonna be like
Chilling, it's just a differentroommate, ghostly roommate.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
I guess you could also probably distract them,
like if fucking GeorgeWashington was haunting you.
One day, be like, try thisDorito.
Speaker 3 (40:32):
And they're like holy shit, you'd kill him again.
Flavor, blast his ass back tothe fucking.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
I think this would be a lot of fun for like the first
six months, and then I wouldget really old.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
Try the skittle, you ain't ever ever had flavor like
this boy.
I would blast his ass back tohell that's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (41:09):
I don't know.
Part of me wants to say yes, Iknow part of me is like this is
the rest of your life especiallyif you get like a I don't know
Part of me wants to say yes, Iknow Part of me is like this is
the rest of your life.
Speaker 3 (41:15):
Especially if you get like a I don't know.
There's a lot of different.
You know he said poltergeist,so like there's different types
of specters, but it'd be reallybad if some thing was, like you
know, actually terrorizing yourmind.
It's hard to talk about thiswith Giggles McGee over here,
but I think I'm actually.
(41:35):
I probably my heart says yes,but my brain is like, nah,
that's not a good idea.
Speaker 1 (41:44):
I would do this for six months.
But I'm not going to do it forsix months.
Speaker 3 (41:47):
If it was, like he said, a once a week or once a
month thing, probably, yeah,that'd be way different.
Speaker 1 (41:53):
Try this.
Speaker 2 (41:53):
Dorito.
Speaker 1 (41:57):
That was two million dollars.
Speaker 2 (41:59):
You just have a bag of Doritos on the ready at all
times.
Speaker 3 (42:02):
Hell yeah, you fucking gotta be ready for
ghosts, brother.
Speaker 1 (42:08):
For the next five.
I'm gonna wait on Mike.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
He over here crying and shit.
I can see water on his shirtnow.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
This is the way you try this Dorito.
Like you're the spokespersonfor this Doritos, go ahead, I'm
good.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Okay, this is the last one.
For the next five years youhave a 24-7 Permanent hype man,
but he's very bad at his job.
Speaker 3 (42:37):
Yes, that's hilarious .
Speaker 2 (42:42):
Yeah, that could be free.
That's funny, I don't even care.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
You said for the next five years yeah.
I Bad in what way?
Like instead of.
Instead of hyping me up, is heconstantly just being like you
know he's got this weird Thing.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Well, if he's hyping you up.
I think it's just in like a badway.
Where he's like Maybe he'susing the wrong Words.
Where like, for example, for me, because I have my child, like
I'd be like introduced Someonebe like yeah, this is Mike, he
loves kids, he's a kid lover.
Speaker 3 (43:19):
It's like I have a daughter.
That's what he means.
I'm getting like the vibes Likehe'd be like someone Like Jeff
Probst, where like he's likekind of trying to hype people up
but he's really just like kindof like Sort of talking shit
about everyone In like a niceway.
Speaker 1 (43:37):
That's kind of what I was thinking like he has a huge
dick but he's got herpes, buthey, it's big, he's pumping, but
he's losing steam.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
Real quick there.
Yeah, I mean I think I'm intoit, just because, like, I'm
trying to think of like reallybad areas where this would
really affect you, like a, likea job interview or something
it's all right, buddy, thisisn't going great, but you're
hanging in there and when we sayhype man, are we talking like
(44:08):
like a rapper hype man, wherehe's just like it's your boy and
he's like screaming andannouncing to everybody?
are you talking like a boxerhype man, where he's just like
it's your boy and he's likescreaming and announcing to
everybody?
Are you talking like a boxerhype man where he's like
massaging you, whispering inyour ear like yeah, you're not
gonna get it, but you tried yourbest and that's what counts?
Speaker 1 (44:19):
you know like I'm imagining like dj cal rapper
like the guy yeah, a guy juststanding behind you the whole
time, just be like yeah, get 100.
Speaker 2 (44:28):
I'm in that's.
That's hilarious.
I want I'd do that for free.
If someone offered to do thatfor me right now, I wouldn't let
them.
Speaker 3 (44:35):
I can't immediately come to terms with.
Speaker 1 (44:38):
Can't immediately come that sucks, he can't come.
Speaker 3 (44:42):
I can't immediately think of anything that would
make this the worst thing ever,I guess.
So I guess I'd do it.
Speaker 1 (44:49):
It is only five years , it's not the rest of your life
.
Speaker 3 (44:52):
So I guess I'd do it.
It is only five years.
Yeah, it's not the rest of yourlife.
It's a lifestyle change forsure, but it's five years that
I'm willing to pay for that muchmoney.
Speaker 2 (45:03):
I'm just imagining having to do everything with
this obnoxious person justyelling.
Yeah, I'm trying to imaginelike you're going to a funeral
for a distant relative orsomething and you're there and
then he just kicks in the door.
He's like, like it's your boy,mike.
He showed up, but he's onlyhere because he felt obligated
by the rest of the family yeah,that's what I'm afraid of.
Speaker 1 (45:24):
I'm saying no, I'm still in it 100%.
Speaker 3 (45:27):
I think I'm gonna be in it too.
Speaker 2 (45:29):
Can I talk to him be like hey, not like that, don't
do it Punch him in the throat.
Shut up Whenever he comes in.
Just Two million dollars.
Damn, I'm rich after this.
All it cost me was a lot ofconvenient things in my life.
Speaker 1 (45:44):
Alright.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
What are we looking at, tally-wise?
Speaker 1 (45:51):
I'm working.
Speaker 2 (45:51):
Alright, mr Tally man , tally me banana Come.
Have you seen those cyberpunkMemes when it's Keanu Reeves and
he's like I thought you wouldnever come and then it just like
freezes in?
That's the music.
Speaker 3 (46:11):
Have you seen those?
Speaker 2 (46:12):
I don't think so, alright, I'll show you.
I fucking love them.
Speaker 1 (46:15):
If my calculations are correct, I'm in last with 10
.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
Still good money.
Speaker 1 (46:22):
And in second place is Doug with 12 and Mike takes
it with 15.
Speaker 3 (46:28):
Hey, mike's life sucks.
Speaker 2 (46:31):
It does, but I'm here for it.
Speaker 3 (46:32):
But he's got $15 million.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
I'm here for this.
Speaker 3 (46:39):
Oh, fuck, it All right.
Speaker 1 (46:46):
Is that the end of the episode?
Speaker 2 (46:47):
Yeah, Sorry, but that's just like immediately
half the things you say, I thinkof that.
I think it's funny, but yeah,that is the episode.
Dad, dad, dad, dad, sorry weforgot that part.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
We never also introduced it.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
This was the bonus, as you know.
Speaker 3 (47:02):
You're listening to a bonus.
Speaker 2 (47:04):
Welcome to dad.
Goodbye to dad, welcome toreally tall podcast.
Speaker 1 (47:12):
We've got to bring Really Tall Podcast back.
Speaker 2 (47:14):
That was great.
Yeah, we did All right.
Well, thanks for tuning ineverybody, and we promise Well,
I shouldn't make a promise, butthis one will hopefully be out
on time.
Speaker 1 (47:25):
I mean, what's time anymore?
Right?
We had released two episodesthis month.
We released three this monthand the months before.
Speaker 2 (47:32):
We put out three.
Speaker 1 (47:34):
Oh, we did.
I think in the descriptions itdoes say Some amount Of bonus
episodes.
Speaker 2 (47:43):
Legally, we are holding up our end of the
bargain.
That could be none that couldbe a lot.
Speaker 3 (47:49):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (47:51):
Thank you everybody for tuning in.
Speaker 1 (47:53):
Really love that um have a nice rest of your day.
Speaker 2 (47:55):
Really love that and hope you played along and you
won money.
Uh, message us what your sum up, your total, and message us
what your total is if you beatmy 15 mil.
Um, let us know.
Send us a message in patreon oruh uh, email or text or
whatever, and uh or socials orwhatever.
That'd be fun.
Let us know.
Bye, goodbye, goodbye.
Speaker 3 (48:15):
Goodbye.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
Don't look under the internet after dark.
Thank you.
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