The One at Shock-O-Con LIVE!

What if Mary Poppins and Pennywise from "It" were the same species? Join us on this unforgettable live episode of the Don't Make it Weird podcast as we speculate wildly and hilariously about this and more at Shock-O-Con in Maryland. Daniel, Dina, and our Producer Sean meet face-to-face for the first time, sharing their journey from online acquaintances to close-knit friends and co-hosts. Feel the camaraderie and enjoy spontaneous audience interactions as we kick off with laughter and excitement.

Brace yourselves for some quirky and stomach-turning moments as we dive into an unusual soda taste-testing adventure. From pickle to bacon-flavored sodas, our reactions are unfiltered and utterly hilarious. We also play a cheeky game of "Smash or Slash: Horror Edition," debating whether we'd hypothetically 'smash' or 'slash' iconic horror characters. The fun doesn't stop there as we explore our "Secret Kinks and Wedding Drama" segment, revealing some truly unexpected attractions and quirks.

Finally, get ready to laugh out loud at Daniel's hilarious childhood anecdote about a vocabulary mishap involving the word "ejaculate," and cringe along with us as we critique some of the worst erotic literature in our "Cringey Copulation" segment. This episode is packed with humor, candid confessions, and unforgettable interactions, making it an absolute must-listen. Come along for the ride and experience the magic of our first-ever live recording!

Support the show

Daniel's website: https://dumps4danq.com
Dina's website: https://dinasaurusd.com

You can find the video presentation of this show on our YouTube channel, and the audio only version on any of your favorite podcast apps!

📢 Call us! Got a weird story, a conspiracy theory, or a better use for baby oil? Leave us a voicemail or text us at (347) 69-WEIRD! 📞 That’s [phone]!

🎟️ Support the show!
For just $1/month, you can join our Patreon for exclusive content and suggest segment ideas like this one! 👉 patreon.com/DMIW

Don't Make It Weird Podcast on Twitter: http://twitter.com/dmiwpodcast
Daniel on Twitter: http://twitter.com/danqwritesthing
Dina on Twitter: http://twitter.com/dinasaurusd
Producer Sean on Twitter: http://twitter.com/shaceholdu

Music Credit:
Swing Rabbit ! Swing ! by Amarià https://soundcloud.com/amariamusique
Creative Commons — Attribution 3.0 Unported — CC BY 3.0
Free Download / Stream: https://bit.ly/al-swing-rabbit-swing
Music promoted by Audio Library https://youtu.be/lt7fn1NVxQM

Credits song written and performed by ...

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
We're going to go live.
We're just going to go live.

Speaker 2 (00:02):
If you touch me one more time, I'm going to Dina.

Speaker 1 (00:05):
Dina, I can't help that.
I know you're going to fuckingnot tap me on the.
I'm not trying to, okay.
Okay, I'm just clumsy.

Speaker 2 (00:11):
I consent to accident .

Speaker 1 (00:13):
Accidental hand brushes.

Speaker 3 (00:18):
All right, we are live on YouTube.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
The one at ShakaCon live Always wanted to do that in
person.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
I know, I know.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
We finally got the clickety clack.

Speaker 3 (00:30):
Yeah, for those that don't know, we usually do this
remote because I'm in Floridaand he's in Georgia, so yeah, so
this is actually our firstofficial episode that we're
doing in person together, sowelcome, thank you for coming.

Speaker 1 (00:41):
You guys are all complicit now.
You guys are now part of theDon't Make a Weird Family.
Yes, welcome.

Speaker 3 (00:46):
And everyone watching on YouTube, welcome.
I'm going to post this to ourTwitter really quick and we'll
get started.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Oh, I'll retweet it just for you.
Might as well help out.

Speaker 1 (00:59):
We are social media all-stars.
You can tell we definitely gotthis down to a side.

Speaker 3 (01:04):
Yeah, we a side, we have a job in marketing.

Speaker 1 (01:05):
We have a job in marketing, okay.

Speaker 3 (01:11):
Let's go, Daniel.

Speaker 2 (01:14):
Let's do it, baby.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
Wait, I haven't retweeted it, yet Can you wait?
Oh my god, no, now people aregoing to be confused.
You need a moment.

Speaker 2 (01:17):
We're live.
I reposted Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:20):
We're good now.
We're good Hard eye contact Allright, we're good.

Speaker 3 (01:23):
Now we're good Hard eye contact.
Are you adjusting the camera?
Thank you, all right, daniel.
All right, it's the Don't Makeit Weird podcast.

Speaker 1 (01:42):
With your hosts, daniel and Dina Soros.
Hello there and welcome to theDon't Make it Weird podcast.
We are your comedy storytellingpodcast for humans by humans.
And oh my God, we are liveright here in the heart of
Harvard, the Grace Maryland,which I know I pronounced wrong
at.
ChacoCon.
And man, I'm one of yourco-hosts, daniel Quigley, and I
am joined, as always, by thesensational sultry summoner of

(02:02):
screaming sandwiches herself,dina Soros.
Hi, daniel, hi Dina, we cantouch you, we can touch each
other.
We're in person.
So for those of you guys thatdon't know, man, we've been
doing this show for almost threeyears and in this time, this is
our first time that all threeof us have ever been live in the

(02:22):
same room together.
Also, the first time that weare here with a live audience,
live audience.
This is amazing.
Thank you guys, so much forcoming and hanging out with us.
Um, this has been an absolutelyincredible experience being out
here at shocker con.
We've met so many incrediblepeople and we've got an amazing
show for you guys tonight.
But before we get any further,we have a third member of our
crew, the only adult in the room.

(02:42):
That is going to be producerSean, because, guess what?
He's going down down in anearlier round and, sugar, he's
going down swinging.
He's another one with a trigger, a loaded Sean complex with a
huge cock and screaming producer.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
Wow, that really got mixed up there near the end.

Speaker 1 (03:02):
Yeah, no, I really didn't.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
Can I just say that was like one of my favorite
intros that you've done.
Thank you, I'm makingimprovements.
Is that what your rundown lookslike on your phone all the time
?

Speaker 1 (03:11):
Well, no, just the intros, and I've got the actual
rundown that we pull.

Speaker 2 (03:13):
I hate that you rewrite our entire show on your
phone.

Speaker 1 (03:18):
That's horrifying.
That would be my level of laz.
Absolutely so for the new folks, me and Sean have been friends
since freaking middle school.
I consensually objectify him atevery opportunity.
Not consensual, it's notBecause he's my best friend and
I love him, and if I can'tobjectify him, who can I
objectify?

(03:38):
Nobody.
Yeah, that is the key here.
Consent is very important to us.
You as well.
We've got some scary clownshere that have said I can
objectify them.
You, beautiful, beautifulrainbow son of a bitch, and Dina
, me and Dina.
For those of you guys thatdon't know, we met actually
online in the writing communityon Twitter.

(04:00):
She had a beta reader that cameout and was like hey, listen,
everything you write is terribleand you're a horrible person,
basically, would you say.

Speaker 2 (04:08):
That sums it up, dina .
Yeah, my writing made her wantto vomit and puke up all over
the page.

Speaker 1 (04:13):
Yeah, and she wrote that on my manuscript.
So buy it.
Buy nothing special now if youwould like to vomit as well, but
um, you know, I, I saw this.
This is before my copy fivehundred dollars.
five hundred dollars right now.
Um, and so we saw this.
We met before long for any ofus got published, long before
any of us did any type ofwriting.
And I saw that post and Iimmediately DM her and I was

(04:33):
like, listen, I don't know whothis fucking asshole is that
that's talking shit about yourstory.
Let me read this, let me be abeta reader.
And I had no idea what toexpect, because she writes in a
genre that's not like my mainthing.
And I started reading I waslike my God, this is amazing.
This person's an absolutepsychopath for trashing this and
a friendship was born.

Speaker 2 (04:53):
Oh, I thought you meant I was a psychopath and I
was like, yes, yes, yes, that iscorrect.

Speaker 1 (04:58):
And so now we've got this weird eclectic friendship
where we've got California,florida, georgia and now we're
recording in fucking Maryland.
So, uh, that's, that's wherewe're at baby.
Um, and man, it's such a coolexperience getting to do this
with you guys.
Um, so you know, we're going totry to, uh, not ramble too much
so I don't miss my flight later.
But, um, we've got an amazingthemed party for you guys.

(05:21):
We are going to be getting intoTikTok conspiracy corner.
We're going to be trying someincredibly weird and bizarre
sounding sodas from our bestfriends at a blast from the past
.
Sodas and sweets.
It's a professional we are.

Speaker 2 (05:35):
You weren't supposed to be the one that read that
Cause you could have fucked thatup.

Speaker 1 (05:37):
I definitely would have, and this is like a real
person that we need to respect.

Speaker 2 (05:40):
Yeah, no, that was my job that we need to respect,
that was my job.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
We're going to say it again.
We're going to be hearing someof Dina's crazy life stories.
We're going to let you guyspick.
This is going to be a chooseyour own adventure.
You guys get to pick which Dinastory that you guys get.
You also get a story from methat is a lot less curated and I
apologize in advance for that.
We went around earlier we askedpeople smash or slash with a

(06:07):
horror movie people.
We're going to be going overthat and, uh, we're going to be
getting weird with it, that thatwe want to hear some weird
takes from you guys as well.
And then, at the very end, forthose of you guys that are, um,
bad erotica connoisseurs, wehave especially, uh picked,
Especially picked from the UKLiterary Review.
We have a section called.
I'm sorry for offending you,sir.

Speaker 3 (06:27):
People are already leaving.

Speaker 1 (06:28):
Already gone.

Speaker 3 (06:29):
They're just spilling out.

Speaker 1 (06:30):
They don't want the cringy copulation at all, and so
we pick a great passage.
The UK Literary Review does apassage every year, and we're
going to read some bad eroticafor you guys as well, man.
So this is going to be a reallyfun episode.
Do you know how we feel?

Speaker 2 (06:44):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (06:45):
Yeah, but nothing's weird at all right.
This is totally normal.
Oh my God, this is just anormal day for us Follow the
rundown.
It's fine.

Speaker 2 (06:59):
You already lost your place.
It's supposed to be aprofessional.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
We are very professional, sean.
We do a drinking game on thisshow because we're alcoholics.
Right, we do, we do, so we liketo drink.

Speaker 3 (07:09):
We like to have a good time, and part of that
means we play some drinkinggames.
So one of them is calledBuffalo.
We are all right-handed andwe're forced to drink with our
offhand, which is our left hand.
If you catch us drinking withour right hand, yell out Buffalo
, um.
And if we catch each other,we'll do the same.
If you're caught in a Buffalo,you must finish your drink.
Then in there, yep, um.

(07:29):
Also, we have a series ofbuzzwords and phrases on the
show that if, if someone saysone of these things, a buzzer
will sound, and that means it'stime for us to take a sip of our
drink.

Speaker 1 (07:40):
So, yeah, we want to get a little drunk with you guys
.
It's going to be great.
But you know, but, sean, do youthink that we could, like, are
the showers operational here?
Like, can we?
Can we hop in the shower?
Right now Are we going to hopin the shower.
We're going to hop in theshower, we're going to get clean
.

Speaker 2 (07:54):
There's absolutely no horseplay in the shower, but
God damn it, daniel, I have afinite amount of alcohol,
alcohol first buzzword I feellike the buzzer.

Speaker 3 (08:04):
Did you guys hear the buzzer did not?
Hear the buzzer did not?
Yeah, it's really quiet in themix.
Let's try this.
Yeah, we got heard that alittle bit more better.
Yeah, okay all right.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
So I want to know.
So this is where we're going tohop in the shower.
This is shower thoughts, withdank as my nickname here.
I'm'm so sorry about that, um,but I I want to say that, like
okay, I had a thought the otherday.
There are no bad forms of pie,sean.
Yes, sir, there's no such thingas a bad pie, and I mean

(08:36):
chicken pot pie, I mean bananapudding pie, like even the
inappropriate green pie.
There is no bad pie.
And I dare you to find bad pieBrew barb.

Speaker 3 (08:47):
Pumpkin.

Speaker 1 (08:48):
What no Pumpkin?

Speaker 2 (08:49):
Absolutely.
How fucking dare you?
Sir Pumpkin is absolutely theworst.
You know what?

Speaker 1 (08:57):
All of you are wrong.
Don't boo me, I'm right.

Speaker 2 (08:59):
This is like dabbing in the shower again.
You're the only one that thinksthat it's wrong.

Speaker 3 (09:03):
So Sean Frazier is in the YouTube chat and he's going
to be mad because he likespumpkin pie.

Speaker 1 (09:07):
Because it's the best pie.
Thank you.

Speaker 3 (09:10):
He also said cow pies , that's a good one, that's true
.

Speaker 1 (09:14):
Yeah, cow pies are good pies.

Speaker 2 (09:15):
Well, some people are into it, depends if they
consent.
What is wrong with rhubarb pie?
Honestly, I've never had it.
I just don't like the word.

Speaker 1 (09:24):
It's just rhubarb in general.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
Yeah, I don't like it Buffalo, what?
Was that a buffalo who?

Speaker 3 (09:30):
buffaloed.

Speaker 2 (09:30):
Who buffaloed, oh, oh , okay, they pulled it out for
themselves.
I love that.
Yes, let's go.

Speaker 3 (09:35):
I love that oh my God .

Speaker 1 (09:46):
We have actual audience participation in
buffalo.
Now you have to chug that drink.
If you get buffalo, that's it.
If you consent to chug and justknow, yes, there we go first
drink of the clown show babylove buffalo baby and I will
drink to your.
But yeah, he's living, he'sloving life, right now, that's a
good, that's a good day I meansean, you are a pie connoisseur,
you are our pie expert Iabsolutely am.

Speaker 2 (10:03):
Yeah, yeah, that's my title, okay pie expert and I
feel like people can definitelyhear me swallow with the nicer
mics now that's what she saidthat's another buzzer, yeah uh.

Speaker 1 (10:15):
So, by the way, we are also massively inappropriate
.
So if you find childrenwandering by the haunted library
, like just do, under 18 throwthem out of here, just just
bully.
Yeah, kick them.
Eat them out of here guys whydo you have children?

Speaker 2 (10:26):
it says the people that all have children.
We all have children.
I stand by my remark yep, yep,standing by completely.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
Um, so you know what?
Let's, let's dry off a littlebit, now that I'm completely
right about.
Oh, I was dry the whole time.
I have that.
I have that effect on women.
That was was holy shit, thatwas fucking brutal.
Yeah, I'm just going to go curlup in a corner.
Guys, I'm dead at this point.
But you know what, now thatwe've toweled off, why don't we

(10:54):
dim the lights a little bit?
Put on some spooky mood music,leave your disbelief at the door
.
It's time for Dina's TikTokconspiracy corner.

Speaker 2 (11:03):
Okay, this is a good one.
Oh wait, Do at the door.

Speaker 3 (11:05):
it's time for dina's tiktok conspiracy corner okay,
this is a good one, oh wait dowe have music on the live or no?

Speaker 1 (11:10):
is that I?
I forgot something.
Let's all acapella some spookymusic.

Speaker 2 (11:12):
Oh, that's beautiful, okay, so this conspiracy theory
is mary poppins, and it are thesame species.

Speaker 1 (11:15):
What, how okay oh, I don't have any context.

Speaker 2 (11:16):
I don't know anything about.
It is Mary Poppins and it arethe same species.
What, how?
Okay, oh, I don't have anycontext.
I don't know anything about it.

Speaker 3 (11:28):
You just saw the headline.
Yeah, that's all I got.
That's all I got.
This is how this segment goesfor the audience, for the
uninitiated.
She will make a very, verypointed statement with zero
context, and then we react.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
So I mean, but like, okay, it makes sense For the
record.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
I don't know what it is, dina loves horror.
Well, I know that it's like aclown in the gutter.
He's a clown.
That's all that I got.
I know that it's a clown in thegutter.
It's an alien, Dina.
Okay, well, Mary Poppins is analien then.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
Okay, I mean, I can see that they both have magic
powers.

Speaker 2 (12:03):
They're both, you know it, fly like Mary Poppins
can.
Oh yeah, that's so much worse.

Speaker 1 (12:05):
Oh my God, dina just understood her own conspiracy
corner right now.

Speaker 2 (12:10):
No, that's so much worse.
I thought that that clown juststayed in the, that the alien
just stayed in the gutter.

Speaker 1 (12:17):
No, dude, it feeds on your fears.
This shit's everywhere.
I'm fucked.
Yeah, you're totally fuckedAbsolutely.

Speaker 3 (12:22):
Oh no, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool
cool cool.

Speaker 2 (12:24):
Love that, love that.
Love that, love that.

Speaker 1 (12:25):
Yeah, and they both prey on children, depending on
how you.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
Depending on how you look at it.

Speaker 1 (12:31):
yeah, yeah, I could see.
All right, we're going to pollthe audience.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
She forces kids to like that's a good one.
Alright, we believe we got atleast half the crowd.

Speaker 1 (12:50):
Clap your hands if you believe.

Speaker 2 (12:51):
No, oh no, alright, I'm proud of that one then.

Speaker 1 (12:53):
Yeah, that's a good one.
No, I like that one, so I thinkwe're going to count this one
as conspiracy confirmed.
I think is the move here withthis one, yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:01):
So it's no longer a conspiracy, it's fact.

Speaker 1 (13:03):
Yeah, this is just fucking fact.
So I'm just like preaching mynew mantra yeah, this is the
gospel.

Speaker 2 (13:08):
Yeah, it's a new cult .

Speaker 1 (13:10):
There we go, so listen, we've survived the
TikTok conspiracy corner and nowwe're going to get into a
little bit of a segment, asegment that we in no way stole
from some of our best friendsthat do.
You should definitely not checkout Anthony and Stevie wild
card and check out their comicsdeathless and play it again, or
check out the we have issuespodcast.
It's our accountability segment, where we discuss Christopher

(13:33):
Flory.
I love you, baby.

Speaker 2 (13:35):
I'm going to miss you so much.

Speaker 1 (13:36):
That's another author Christopher is amazing.
You guys definitely check outthe Paul Dodge novels.
Oh, you got the name right.
I'm very bad at getting namesright.
I, that was a hail mary rightthere.
But so this is anaccountability segment where we
hold each other accountable forgoing on the writing journey,
seeing where we're at and, uh,what we're working on.

(13:56):
So, uh, dina, how's the writinglife going for you?
Buddy?
That's non-existent.
Dina, you're almost your secondbook's almost out.

Speaker 2 (14:05):
Okay, yeah, like I mean I finished edits and my
book is coming out September19th, but like I haven't done
anything, that's in the hands ofthe editors, that's not at this
point.

Speaker 1 (14:14):
So you're you've been working on like your memoir.

Speaker 2 (14:16):
Like, like I, I stopped, I haven't done anything
.

Speaker 1 (14:21):
So we're not going to be accountable today.
We're just no accountability.

Speaker 2 (14:23):
I mean, I showed up here.
That's accountability.
This counts, accountabilityenough.

Speaker 1 (14:28):
Count it, that counts .
And you know what?
I've got my second book.
So I've got Thunderstruck.
That's out now.
And then I'm working on mysecond book that's going to be
coming out in May and I just gotmy first round of dev edits
back, and now I have to go backin there and destroy every
little bit beautiful piece ofwording that I love that
apparently might have somemisogyny or might be

(14:49):
inappropriate because I'm afucking moron.
So you know it'll be great.

Speaker 2 (14:58):
You skipped an entire segment and I'm a little bit
offended.
Which one did we skip myNeopets.

Speaker 3 (15:02):
Oh yeah, you didn't ask her about her Neopets.
Oh my God, I'm a little bitoffended.

Speaker 1 (15:04):
Which one did we skip my Neopets?
Oh yeah, you didn't ask herabout her Neopets.
Oh my God, I'm so sorry.
We're going to put this segmenton hold.
Guys, dina is a Neopet magnet,all right, not really A tycoon.
Tell us about what's going onwith Neopets, dina.

Speaker 2 (15:15):
Nothing.

Speaker 1 (15:18):
I just wanted to say that you skipped interest every
day.
I haven't collected it today,though, so it's just in its own
like neopet feel.

Speaker 2 (15:24):
It's just like yeah, it's just like it's switching in
its own waste and I like thatfor it.

Speaker 1 (15:30):
You love that, you love that for it.
Yeah, oh, that's, that'sincredible.
Well, the good news is, guys,um, if you, if you've enjoyed
hanging out with us, if you everwant to interact with us, a
call.
We've got our own dedicatedline.
We've got people around theclock manning the phones.
Uh, you can give us a call at.

Speaker 2 (15:51):
Uh, I don't have the phone number, sean, I don't
remember it's on the businesscard that's right in front of me
is is this 347.

Speaker 1 (15:58):
We have this.
I'm so weird.
Yeah, you can give us a call at347.
Seven six, nine, nine.
Weird, that's three, four,seven, six, nine, nine.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
Three four, seven, three you say that every single
week and you don't have itmemorized yeah, that's weird
yeah I'm really bad at this.

Speaker 1 (16:15):
I should probably get my mental like faculties
checked out, like I.
I think that that's animportant element.
To have another drink?
Yeah, I know I really need togo drink a little bit more.
But um d for the folks at homethat maybe don't know, would you
consider yourself a tease?
I am Tickle the Pickle.
I called you because I had aproblem.
I'm not a fan of your podcast.
It's a little redundant.

(16:37):
Watch the wire what did you say.
I said would you consideryourself a tease?

Speaker 2 (16:44):
Oh, I am Took out the pickle.
I forgot sink pickle.
I had it ready to go in mybackpack.

Speaker 1 (16:50):
Yeah, a little sink pickle.
Oh my God.
We got another beer.

Speaker 2 (16:53):
Let's go.

Speaker 1 (16:54):
You are an absolute legend, sir.
So we have a choose youradventure.
Yeah, so we can choose our ownadventure.
All right.
So this is where we need youguys.
So we're going to give you guysthree log lines of stories that
dean is going to tell us laterin the episode.
You pick which one sounds themost uh, ridiculous and insane,
and uh, we'll go from there okay, so today we can choose from uh
, the time that I was in a bikergang.

(17:16):
We can choose from gator bait orthe wedding that I ruined
that's some good ones, all rightright, so should we do a round
of applause?

Speaker 2 (17:26):
Like a applause meter situation or do we just want to
count hands Because, likeeverybody, can hold up the
number that they wanted?

Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yeah, here we go.
Yeah, we'll hold the number wegot wedding.

Speaker 2 (17:33):
Oh, that's okay, this is universal.

Speaker 3 (17:38):
They want to know about you ruining a wedding.
Yeah, it's no other vote.

Speaker 1 (17:41):
That's right.
Or three, it is.
The people have spoken.
Okay, we can do that one, allright.
So we'll be coming back to thatone in a second and you guys
are getting a second story fromme, and I'm so sorry about the
title of this.
We'll tell the title later yeahthere's a shot.

Speaker 2 (17:57):
We won't say the title right this second, right
this second.

Speaker 1 (17:59):
Yeah, it Be cool, be cool.
All right, we'll come back tothe title in a second.
Sean, we're going to play alittle game first, but do we
want to get a little weird withthe drinks?

Speaker 3 (18:11):
Yeah, let's try it.
So we got given some unusualflavored sodas to try and review
.

Speaker 2 (18:18):
From the blast from the past sodas and sweets.
You can visit their boothwhenever we're done here.
They're right out there, sowe've got yeah, what is that?

Speaker 1 (18:28):
soda pickle pop oh, my god pickle pop, pop the pick
should we all just choose one?

Speaker 2 (18:34):
and try it.
Are we not gonna like you wantto pass it around?

Speaker 1 (18:37):
yeah, we're gonna pass around.
We're already this close, guys.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
Okay and then we've got the hatch, chilies and lime
I'm glad you pronounced that,because I was going to say it
wrong.

Speaker 1 (18:45):
You're going to say Hatche, hosh, hosh.

Speaker 3 (18:49):
What a weird thing to mispronounce.

Speaker 2 (18:52):
I didn't register that it was a regular word.

Speaker 3 (18:54):
Yeah, it's a totally regular word.
I definitely need another drink.
All right, we're going to startwith this.
No.

Speaker 2 (18:59):
I don't want to start with spicy, because that could
like manipulate the otherflavors.

Speaker 1 (19:02):
Well, I think that pickle is a big theme in our
show, so I think that we startwith the pickle pop.
Okay.

Speaker 3 (19:06):
Our palate might be, compromised.
No matter what flavor you startwith.

Speaker 1 (19:10):
But you know, I think you should still use the little
army guy here Like this is ahefty.

Speaker 2 (19:13):
You can't use a bottle opener on a twist pop.
That would be stupid All right,here we go.

Speaker 1 (19:19):
First reaction to the pickle pop this pop, this is
pickle.

Speaker 2 (19:29):
That's a really strong odor.
That's a strong odor thattastes, it tastes like sugary.

Speaker 1 (19:32):
This is my left hand.

Speaker 3 (19:33):
No, no, no, if grandpa joe's right grandpa
joe's brand, old-fashioned sodapop, pickle pop flavor wait,
sean, shut up.

Speaker 2 (19:37):
We gotta explain this .
So if I drink with my left hand, I don't have to finish the
drink.
If I drink with my right hand,I have to finish the drink yeah,
so it's always offhand.

Speaker 1 (19:45):
Non-dominant hand is the buffalo world.
All right, sean.

Speaker 3 (19:51):
I actually like that.
Oh shit, okay, but I'm the kindof person who will drink pickle
brine from the jar.

Speaker 1 (19:56):
so I will too, but that was like sweet.
You're an absolute fuckingpsychopath is very pickly aroma.

Speaker 2 (20:04):
Yeah, that gets it right in the nose.
That's what she said.

Speaker 1 (20:07):
Shit Fuck.
You know like the smell getsyou a lot, but the actual
aftertaste isn't bad it tasteslike dill pickle, and it's
exactly what I wanted it totaste like.

Speaker 3 (20:20):
Yeah, no, I'm here for it.

Speaker 1 (20:21):
Who's this bottle opener?
Yeah, I was going to say Idon't know if you have it.
How's a bottle opener work?

Speaker 2 (20:25):
I don't drink beer.

Speaker 3 (20:26):
Give it to me.

Speaker 2 (20:29):
Thanks Sean, thanks Daddy Sean.

Speaker 1 (20:31):
So this is Daddy Podcast.
He's the one that makes surethat we stay responsible and on
point.

Speaker 2 (20:34):
What the fuck did you just do?

Speaker 3 (20:36):
I used a lighter to open the bottle.

Speaker 1 (20:40):
Oh my god, I thought it was like your bare hand.
Just fucking rip that thing off, is this?

Speaker 3 (20:44):
ketchup, just brute force it.

Speaker 2 (20:47):
Yeah, don't think about it.
This immediately hurt mystomach.

Speaker 3 (20:49):
Can you just drink it , dude?
We have a lot to go throughhere.

Speaker 1 (20:52):
I don't care.
You got manned up dina.
Oh my god, you took a big sipthere oh no, the aftertaste gets
you.

Speaker 2 (20:59):
The initial is okay, the aftertaste is not good.

Speaker 1 (21:01):
Oh, fuck, that is a very pungent.
I mean these, these sodas areabsolutely no joke when we go
for this no is it enough for you?

Speaker 3 (21:12):
let me, let me try it .
Yeah, that's no for me, dog.
I'm not even a ketchup fan tobegin with.
Oh God.

Speaker 1 (21:18):
Patrick Mahomes would love this shit.
It's the same brand.

Speaker 3 (21:21):
Grandpa Joe's Old Fashioned Soda Pop.
Is this the dude from WillyWonka and the Chocolate Factory?

Speaker 1 (21:25):
I think so, man.
Yeah, this is how we're allturning.
Oompa loompas.
Sean, you're taking too big aswig.

Speaker 2 (21:30):
You're making me taste it.

Speaker 3 (21:32):
Dude, this tastes like cherry soda.
It doesn't even taste likeketchup.

Speaker 2 (21:35):
Are you kidding?

Speaker 3 (21:35):
me.
What the fuck, Sean?
It's very sweet.
Oh, jesus, okay, so we hadbacon last time we did a taste
test.
It was a different brand,though.
Yeah, different brand, itwasn't.

Speaker 1 (21:43):
Grand Joe's.
I'll just pop that off rightthere.
Yeah, go ahead and pop thatshirt off Sean.

Speaker 3 (21:45):
How were you able to twist off the pickle flavored
one, but it's the same brand.

Speaker 1 (21:51):
Sean it does look slide of hand like you're just
fucking ripping that thing rightoff.

Speaker 3 (21:56):
All right bacon flavor.
I hope it has like that, realstrong greasy fat flavor.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
Get that Ron Swanson in there.

Speaker 3 (22:06):
Oh no, that's awful.
It's sugar and liquid smokeflavoring.
Oh, you said that last time,that's what they always do with
artificial bacon flavor and itdoesn't taste like bacon.
Give me some goddamn bacon.

Speaker 2 (22:21):
That tastes like cream soda.

Speaker 3 (22:23):
Yeah, it has a cream soda factor to it, and then it
hits you in the back with thefake smoke flavoring.

Speaker 1 (22:32):
Yeah, you're right, that's cream soda with smoke at
the back of it.
Yeah, yeah, that's weird.
Yeah, all's weird.
Yeah, all right, we got onelast one left.

Speaker 3 (22:39):
One last big shot.
This is Jones brand hatch,green chili and lime.
Oh no, oh no.

Speaker 1 (22:45):
Oh, my God, Go for it .

Speaker 3 (22:46):
Go for it, Dina, Just send it baby, just send it.

Speaker 1 (22:50):
It's a special release.
It says oh my God.

Speaker 2 (22:53):
God, so he stepped up for us.
Okay, the smell is way worsethan the flavor.
That's good.
That's also what she said.

Speaker 1 (23:00):
That's what she's saying, everything here, okay.

Speaker 3 (23:02):
It really tastes like chilies.
It's not spicy, though.

Speaker 2 (23:05):
It's not.

Speaker 3 (23:07):
It kind of just tastes like regular green bell
pepper.

Speaker 2 (23:10):
Oh yeah, that's what it is.
Yeah, that's actually the mostnormal out of all of them.

Speaker 1 (23:13):
That's a good one.
Okay, all right.
Jones, special release man, I'mproud of you guys for that one.
Oh my gosh, all right.
So we got a little weird withthe sodas, definitely, uh,
highly recommend you guys checkthem out, man, check them out in
the booth, check them out overhere in maryland.
Get some weird stuff.

Speaker 3 (23:26):
Who are we checking out?
Uh can we?
Can we see the name of thebusiness?

Speaker 2 (23:30):
check out blast from the past.
Sodas and sweets.
They're blast from the past,hdgcom.

Speaker 3 (23:36):
You could have read this ahead of time.
I did, you did perfect.

Speaker 1 (23:40):
Nailed it Alright.
Now we're going to get a littlesexy here, guys, so we're going
to use our sexy voices as we gothrough our next little bit
right here.

Speaker 3 (23:48):
That's your sexy voice.
Yeah, that's my sexy voice.

Speaker 2 (23:50):
How has your wife ever gotten pregnant?

Speaker 1 (23:56):
I ask myself that every single day.

Speaker 3 (24:00):
Not by him.
We went around the con a littlebit earlier with a microphone
and recorded people playing alittle mini version of this game
called Smash or Slash HorrorEdition.
So we have a list of horror,iconic horror characters that we

(24:22):
are going to ask the questionsmash or slash?

Speaker 1 (24:26):
And here's the thing, guys If you agree, definitely
let's hear it, give it up.
If you disagree, just boo usvery loudly, because I also like
being booed.
So really this is a win-win forme regardless of how you guys
react.

Speaker 2 (24:38):
That's my toe.
You're stepping on.

Speaker 1 (24:40):
I'm sorry, I just want to play foot speed.

Speaker 3 (24:44):
All right, daniel, you have the list right.

Speaker 2 (24:48):
What is wrong with you?

Speaker 3 (24:49):
What just?

Speaker 2 (24:50):
happened?
He just groped me what?
No, I mean my hair.

Speaker 3 (24:53):
My hair.
Let's be clear, that was myhair.

Speaker 1 (24:55):
I realized what I said, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I was going to say I'm canceled.
Kick me the fuck out if I everdo that.
Holy shit.
No, daniel, whenever I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (25:04):
Thank you, that was improper wording.

Speaker 3 (25:06):
Oh, daniel's mom is in the YouTube chat, by the way.

Speaker 1 (25:08):
Hi Coralie.
Hi to my mom.
Every time I do this show it'sjust a little.
I'm so sorry.

Speaker 2 (25:15):
Do you mess up my hair?
No, it was very gentle I loveyou, corley.

Speaker 1 (25:22):
Do you guys want to all say hi Corley on three, just
so that my mom feels loved here?
All right, so here we go.
One, two, three, hi Corley.

Speaker 3 (25:30):
Oh, that was beautiful, everybody that was so
beautiful.

Speaker 1 (25:33):
You guys are amazing.
I love you all.
All right, so we're.
I'm going to guess I'm going tocurate this one, because I've
actually got the pictures hereand I've got the list, but I'll
show me the pictures too,because I'm not going to know
anybody is.
So those of you that don't know, I don't know anything about
horror even though her firstever story that she wrote
apparently is a fucking horrorstory scared to be here.
She's that person that whenever,like we get gifted like horror

(25:53):
novels from like authors andstuff that come on our show, she
just puts them in her freezerbecause in the freezer the book
she's not gonna read it.
I'll love you and I'll supportyou, but I'm not gonna read it
and that's why her at a horrorconvention is just the absolute
fucking best right now.
Alright, so the first one we'vegot up is Jason Voorhees you
know, no pass slash.

Speaker 2 (26:15):
I'm sorry, I got used to it.

Speaker 1 (26:16):
Flash.
Alright, sean.
You know no pass.
Oh, no, slash, slash.
I'm sorry, slash.

Speaker 2 (26:18):
I got used to it.

Speaker 1 (26:19):
All right Sean.
What do you think, jasonVoorhees buddy.

Speaker 3 (26:21):
He's tall.
I mean, I'm into tall dudes.

Speaker 1 (26:28):
Imagine he's got, like big hands, the mask stays
on, though Smash.
Smash.
All right, you know I'm kind ofwith you because like he's
going to move slowly.

Speaker 2 (26:37):
Like you know, like this is going to be a patient.

Speaker 3 (26:38):
Oh yeah, this is the guy that chases people at the
door but like doesn't chase thembut very slowly, yeah, but
somehow never.

Speaker 2 (26:43):
No, that would annoy, me, so definitely slash.

Speaker 3 (26:45):
They're never able to get away from him, even though
he walks very, very slowly.

Speaker 1 (26:51):
All right, so what?

Speaker 2 (26:53):
do you yes?

Speaker 1 (26:54):
I love it I love it all right next up, we've got
michael myers, yeah, michaelmyers, yeah, getting right here
with michael myers is that amask, or is that his face?

Speaker 3 (27:05):
it's doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter it matters tome oh, the mask stays on.

Speaker 1 (27:09):
Mask stays on slash okay, but the mask.
But if the mask came off,you're like you were open-minded
to it potentially smash.
Yeah, okay, okay, because youdon't know what he's going to be
.
Okay, I'm with you.

Speaker 2 (27:18):
He's got an interesting face shape,
interesting face shape.

Speaker 3 (27:21):
The whole William Shatner without eyebrows, vibe
is doing it for me.

Speaker 1 (27:26):
Yeah, I mean listen, he's a man who takes care of his
hair, Like you know, MichaelMyers.

Speaker 2 (27:30):
That's literally what I was thinking here.

Speaker 1 (27:33):
okay, good shape you know what I'm gonna?
I'm gonna, you know, smash too,because like I feel, like he's
gonna give me good hard eyecontact and I hate that.

Speaker 2 (27:40):
I made eye contact.

Speaker 1 (27:41):
That's probably all he'll do before he murderates
you at least I'm gonna feelspecial, all right, so what do
we think?

Speaker 2 (27:46):
michael myers smasher , smasher, slash oh, we all
fucking love michael myers allright now.

Speaker 1 (27:51):
We're gonna get a little uh, we're getting into
some dangerous territory.
We're gonna to go with Pinheadfrom the Hellraiser series Slash
.

Speaker 2 (27:58):
I really thought I was going to have a smash in it.
Wait, did I smash the last guy?

Speaker 1 (28:02):
No, you smashed.
Yeah, you smashed the last guyOkay all right.
Yeah, you said he had a nicehead shape.
Absolutely not.
There's too much of a riskSlash.
Yeah, I don't trust what how wewould work that out.

Speaker 2 (28:19):
The boundaries wouldn't really Never mind.

Speaker 1 (28:21):
Yeah, that's a fair point.
You know what I'm going to goslash here too.
I'm a little worried about theneedles.
I'm very sensitive, all right.
So pinhead smash or slash Smash.

Speaker 3 (28:37):
Oh my.

Speaker 1 (28:37):
God, yes, smashing.
You guys are the most beautifuldegenerates and I love you guys
.
It's incredible, it's great,all right.
So up next we've got a manwho's great with his hands.

Speaker 2 (28:50):
Freddy Krueger Slash.
I can't do those hands.

Speaker 1 (28:52):
Can't do those hands.

Speaker 2 (28:54):
What if he goes hands-free?

Speaker 1 (28:55):
and keeps them behind his back.

Speaker 3 (28:56):
Can't he just take the glove off?

Speaker 1 (29:00):
For a minute I thought the glove was
permanently attached.
Is this something that he can?

Speaker 3 (29:02):
take off, I don't know?

Speaker 1 (29:03):
Yeah, who knows Freddy Krueger lore, can he take
the glove off?

Speaker 3 (29:07):
Nobody knows.
I thought it was just a glove.

Speaker 2 (29:10):
She thinks it's seared in there.

Speaker 1 (29:12):
That's what.

Speaker 2 (29:12):
I'm saying I can't do that.
I don't know.
Yeah, sean, what do?

Speaker 3 (29:14):
you think about it?
Smash or slash it's a hardslash for me, hard slash.
I'm not into pedophilia.

Speaker 1 (29:24):
You know what and like, I'm okay with the face,
but yeah, the hands are aproblem.
I need to be able to befunctional here, guys, so I'm
going to go slash as well.
What do you guys slash?
Freddy Krueger she said smash.
I got one girl out here.
She's all about that life.
I love it.
I love it.
Everyone has a type.
Now we're going to get a littlebit more normal, very healthy,

(29:45):
functional person We've got.
Why am I blanking on her name?
It's Amy.
Annie Nailed it.
Fuck, I messed this up FromMisery.
Who remembers from Miserywhat's his name?

Speaker 2 (29:58):
it's that's not new though yeah uh slash.
Why are you gonna slash her?
I don't like what's going onthere absolute slash.

Speaker 3 (30:09):
She just wants to take care of you she's, yeah,
she's got like mommy vibes awoman, a crazed woman, to kidnap
you, kidnap you and then breakyour fucking ankles because she
doesn't like the way youfinished your book.

Speaker 1 (30:23):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (30:24):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (30:25):
Yeah, like that's pressure.
Is that really what happens?
40-year-old story A bookPressure makes diamonds.

Speaker 3 (30:31):
She's a big fan of this author.

Speaker 2 (30:33):
Okay, oh, I got it now.

Speaker 3 (30:39):
She kidnaps him.
Some people could be into that.
She rescues him from a caraccident and then makes him
write his manuscript and finishit the way she likes it, under
threat of violence yeah, listen,pressure creates diamonds, and
I think that that's gonna makeme a better author.

Speaker 1 (30:50):
Okay, all right guys, are we uh smash or pass in here
?
smash or slash sean frazier said, but she's a huge fan of
reading, so they're like listen,if you're physically disfigured
and supernatural, we're into it, but if you're just an
obsessive fan, you know.
All right, that's fair.
All right, guys, now we'regonna get really fucking sexy
right here.
We are gonna go deadpool, smash, but, but, but, smash.

(31:13):
Dog pool is watching, smash,smash, still smash.
Yeah, this is a.
This is universal.
I think anyone that says no toDeadpool can just get the fuck
out right now, just just fucking.

Speaker 3 (31:25):
It would be hard to.

Speaker 2 (31:26):
it'd be hard to say no to Wade I don't understand
why you think that the dogwatching is like the the factor
here.

Speaker 3 (31:31):
Here's the thing, though, that dog has like a six
inch long flappy tongue thatnever goes back and it's to his
it's just like me.

Speaker 2 (31:38):
I don't care.

Speaker 3 (31:39):
No, he's a licker, but you'll see it in your
periphery.

Speaker 1 (31:41):
Yeah, he's out there.
Oh my God, light stay on.
Mask is off.
You got to go full topical.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
It's a topographical map of a?

Speaker 1 (31:52):
All right.
So what do we think are we are,we're all universally here,
we're all smashing deadpool anddogs, yeah, yeah, beautiful, all
right.
So the last one, and and listen, I, you guys won't be able to
see it from here, but we'regonna paint a picture here
because we're all authors, greatwith our words.
I want you guys to pictureproducer sean.

Speaker 2 (32:07):
Okay don't picture.
Picture to put him out of hismisery as an 80s hairband metal
enthusiast.

Speaker 1 (32:14):
We're talking long hair down here.

Speaker 3 (32:16):
Skin tight leather pants, shirt off, ripped abs,
eighties hair band he's talkingabout, like Brett Michaels, but
with my head on it.

Speaker 1 (32:24):
Yes, brett Michaels, with his head Photoshopped on
top of him.
Um Dino are we?
Are we smashing or slashing?

Speaker 2 (32:30):
Slash to put him out of his misery, to get him away
from you.

Speaker 1 (32:34):
Just protect him, thank you so?
Much sean, would you smash orslash yourself, buddy?
Oh boy, there's layers to thatthat I don't even want to.
That's why I said never mind.
I mean obviously hard smashhere, guys.
What do we think about uh 80shair metal band producer sean,

(32:55):
oh yeah everybody's scared toanswer because he's like a real
person right here.

Speaker 2 (32:58):
Okay but we're talking about a photoshopped
version that has never existed.
But it's Sean 80s hair metalband.

Speaker 3 (33:05):
Sean isn't real.
He can't hurt you.
He can't hurt you.

Speaker 1 (33:10):
Alright, guys, we have survived it.
We found a lot about ourselves.
We went on a journey together.

Speaker 2 (33:16):
I pretty much knew myself already.

Speaker 1 (33:18):
You're already there.
No, I'm with you, I'm with you.
So we survived, and I thinkthat that means we are going to
get after something that ourshow is based on.
So we call Don't Make it Weird.
And this started out becauseone of my life mottos is it's
not weird if you let it be weird.
And when I told that to Dina,dina then just goes well, just
don't make it weird, don't makeit weird.
And so now we're going to talkabout something that's weird,

(33:43):
that you know maybe you findattractive, that no one else
does, and you guys, any weirdtake that you guys have.
Just shout it out.
Man, we're getting weirdtogether.
Dina, do you want to kick offsomething that you're into?
That's a little weird.

Speaker 2 (33:58):
I guess.
So I really like veins and thenalso Adam's apples.

Speaker 1 (34:05):
Adam's apple.
That's why I didn't know.
I don't know why that's a thingshe likes throbbing baby arms,
like when he swallows.

Speaker 2 (34:11):
I didn't mean it like that, can we?

Speaker 3 (34:14):
put the brakes on with both of you right now.
This is so weird.
He just said throbbing babyarms.

Speaker 1 (34:20):
No veiny I thought he said baby arms.

Speaker 3 (34:21):
I was like what the fuck is he talking about?

Speaker 2 (34:23):
Like when Deadpool is like growing back.

Speaker 3 (34:25):
Oh yeah, it feels really big in this hand yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:31):
Yeah, I could see how misheard that is fucking weird
right there?
Yeah, I didn't hear that at allthough, thank, I could see how
misheard that is fucking weird,I didn't hear that at all though
.

Speaker 2 (34:38):
So thank you, I just ignore you.

Speaker 3 (34:38):
Yeah, that's fair.
Ah, that was that.
That went to a wild place.

Speaker 1 (34:43):
I'm still, I'm still, I'm still fixated on Deadpool
man.
I you know what can I say?

Speaker 3 (34:47):
All right, so Sean what's your like weird thing
think anything that anyone inparticular likes.
The canned answer that you'verehearsed no, I don't like.
That's fair.
I don't know, I, I don't, Ican't really say I.
I have anything that I wouldconsider weird, because if I
thought it was weird, I wouldn'tlike it that's fair.

Speaker 1 (35:09):
that's fair.
You know what that?
That that's an okay thing.
So I guess I would say, um, and, and it follows, like with my
wife is like I like, I like shygirls, like I like quiet, like
you know, then when you're likeat home, and then you just tell
me I'm a fucking asshole, like Idon't know, maybe that's my
kink, like is that okay, that's?

Speaker 3 (35:28):
your wife.

Speaker 2 (35:28):
Yeah, there's a lot of layers to that, that.
I find deeply unsettling.

Speaker 1 (35:32):
Yeah, we can peel back the layers of the potato
right now.

Speaker 3 (35:37):
No, we can peel back the layers of the potato right
now.

Speaker 1 (35:38):
No, we don't need to.
That's why he really hates itwhen you do your meek voice.
Yeah, I need your sterndisapproval, Dina.
You will always have mydisapproval.
I appreciate that.
Thank you, you're welcome, allright, so do we have any weird
things that you guys are into?
It doesn't have to be likephysical, attractive, all right,
what?

Speaker 3 (35:53):
do we got what what?
Any belly buttons, any bellybuttons Okay.

Speaker 2 (35:59):
Oh, I can see it.
Actually, I actually have aintro for the show at one point
that I was going to do.
That was like talking about howhot guys always have like a
specific shaped belly button.

Speaker 1 (36:11):
Wow, is this a thing that I've just been unaware of
this whole time?

Speaker 2 (36:14):
Yeah, there's like a belly button shape.
Are you guys judging my bellybutton right now?
Yeah, it's like kind of like mybelly button right now.
Yeah, it's like yeah, it'sovular.

Speaker 3 (36:22):
It's ovular.

Speaker 2 (36:28):
Hawkeyes always have that type of belly button.

Speaker 3 (36:30):
That's.
This is brand new information,yeah.

Speaker 1 (36:34):
I am never wearing a midriff around any of you guys.

Speaker 3 (36:37):
Again, holy shit, it does happen quite often, more
often than you'd expect.

Speaker 1 (36:41):
Yeah, hawkeyes have that specific belly button Is
there like belly buttonexercises.
Can I do some core workouts to?

Speaker 2 (36:48):
like.

Speaker 1 (36:48):
I think it's like genetically linked to like
Either you have it or I don't.

Speaker 3 (36:51):
Yeah, you have it or you don't.
Oh shit, yeah.

Speaker 1 (36:54):
All right, beyond belly buns, what else we got?
Man, anyone else got like aweird thing that, oh, yes, yes,
what do we got?
Monsters, monsters, let's go.

Speaker 2 (37:03):
Monsters Like monster smut, or like what are we
talking here?

Speaker 1 (37:06):
Like are we talking like you want like big?
Like a real monster you know,take you out for a nice as long
as Bigfoot can consent.
That's a good fucking.
As long as the cryptid canconsent, we're good with it, all
right.
So here's the question thoughWerewolf or vampire?
Both Great answer.
Werewolf.
Personally, she said bothFucking love you.

Speaker 2 (37:26):
She just said monster At the same time.

Speaker 3 (37:29):
Let's go Two monsters at the same time.

Speaker 1 (37:31):
Oh, we got one here, I like horns, horns, horns.
I was hoping you were gonna saycorn and I was gonna say I love
corn too.
It's got the juice you'retalking about, like the noise of
a horn.

Speaker 2 (37:44):
I thought you meant like devil horns or something,
and I was like halloween is agreat night for you the sound of
a horn okay, like, like, are wetalking like?
Okay oh yeah, I'm sorry, Ididn't mean to make that a joke
there it is right there, the DJhorn.
All right, all right.

Speaker 1 (38:01):
All right, we're going to get the crowd going
with these fucking horns.

Speaker 2 (38:04):
Let's go Jeez, that's an interesting one.
Yes, all right, hold on.
We got another, all right.

Speaker 1 (38:09):
What do we got?
Oh my God.

Speaker 2 (38:12):
Yes, is that?
Yeah, that's a thing.
Oh my God, I'm learning so much.

Speaker 1 (38:17):
Yeah, I am horribly unattractive to all of you guys.
I'm so sorry.

Speaker 3 (38:21):
Can you repeat what they said for the folks?

Speaker 2 (38:23):
at home.
Oh yeah, for the people thatdon't know, like um oversized
canines.
Yeah, so we've got.

Speaker 1 (38:37):
we've got loud yeah, I'm learning stuff about myself
too.
We're going on this journeytogether, man.
Yeah, I love this one.

Speaker 2 (38:40):
We're having an awakening up here One more man.

Speaker 1 (38:42):
Anyone else got one more weird attractive, take here
, just give us a pity one,please.

Speaker 3 (38:46):
Yeah, a pity one Just maybe like guys with ginger
beards that are slowly graying.

Speaker 1 (38:50):
What is?

Speaker 3 (38:50):
something you're into Rance.

Speaker 2 (38:53):
What's something you're into?
What's your secret kink?

Speaker 3 (38:55):
Rance Something that, oh, what an answer.

Speaker 1 (39:00):
Boo, this man no answer like she wasn't right
next to you.

Speaker 2 (39:03):
Yeah, yeah, something weird.
Are you even listening to theshow Seth Rogen?
Seth Rogen, yeah, yeah, therewe go, there.
It is there we go.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
That's what we were fishing for.

Speaker 2 (39:18):
He loves his Amish and they got to have the new
balance.
Did your wife know that beforenow?
Yeah, I hated when we found outtoo.
It's disturbing.

Speaker 3 (39:28):
The really modest clothes and then athletic shoes.
That's such a.
That is a weird combination.

Speaker 2 (39:33):
That's a weirdly specific combination, it's not
even weird.

Speaker 1 (39:35):
That's a weirdly specific combination.
It's not even weird, it's justweirdly specific.

Speaker 2 (39:39):
Belly buttons wasn't weirdly specific.

Speaker 3 (39:43):
Belly buttons is a general thing, like, but saying
someone wearing this exactoutfit is what I'm into.

Speaker 2 (39:48):
Especially new balances.

Speaker 1 (39:50):
Yeah, it has to be new belts, not a sponsor.

Speaker 2 (39:55):
But they could be.

Speaker 1 (39:57):
You guys could be a hundred percent, you guys could
be 100, you guys could be.
Well, all right guys, we gotsome weird takes here together.
Man, we, we all, we all learneda lot about ourselves and, um,
I am never gonna get over mybelly button now, guys, I, uh,
I've found a brand newinsecurity that's been unlocked.
All right, guys, so we, we'vedone this, we we've, we've

(40:18):
survived the moment.
So, you see, we're all Brandnew insecurity that's been
unlocked.
All right, guys, so we've donethis, we've survived the moment.
So you see, we're all aboutstorytelling here, and every
week we aim to share anentertaining tale.

Speaker 2 (40:30):
Can we all have that voice?

Speaker 3 (40:34):
I didn't think it was going to be.

Speaker 2 (40:34):
you Go ahead.
This is really hot.
I don't like that.
You know what?

Speaker 3 (40:36):
to say you have the voice.
I didn't think it was going tobe you Go ahead.
This is really hot.
I don't like that.
You know what to say.
You have the voice.
So, without further ado, it'sstory time with Dinosaurics Nice
.

Speaker 2 (40:51):
Okay, so I just want to preface this story with I am
no longer this person.

Speaker 3 (40:58):
It was a long time ago.
How long ago was it?

Speaker 2 (41:00):
She's experienced a lot of personal growth.
I think I was 18.

Speaker 3 (41:03):
Okay, hold on, let me see if we can hear this.

Speaker 2 (41:06):
Okay, yeah we're going back.
We're going back.
I am no longer this person andI am deeply sorry, but also not.

Speaker 3 (41:14):
This was like way last week, you guys.

Speaker 2 (41:15):
Yeah, this was like I totally changed last night.
So I was friends with this girlin college and she happened to
get engaged and I was superhappy for her.
She asked me to be.
I don't remember if I was hermaid of honor or just a
bridesmaid Just super importantthough.
Yeah, I was one of.
I think I was her only friendin the wedding because she had
family.

(41:40):
But then, like there was me andI was the only non-family member
and they had planned to getmarried in the middle of a
semester break and they had likea week Ow, something just bit
my leg.
What the hell bit your leg, Idon't know.

Speaker 1 (41:55):
Oh, we're live.
This is a bad story.

Speaker 2 (41:56):
That really hurt.

Speaker 1 (41:57):
Are you okay?

Speaker 2 (41:58):
I'm okay, I can push through.
I'm a professional.
This is live studio baby.
So they had planned to getmarried a week during like a
week break or a two week breakthat we had between semesters
because we were all doing summerschool, and she had been
engaged for several months atthat point and I happened to get
engaged and she immediatelytexted me after I got engaged

(42:20):
and said you are not allowed toget married the same week, the
same month or the same year.

Speaker 1 (42:27):
Even the same fucking year.

Speaker 2 (42:28):
Yes, because I had told her that I wanted to get
married quickly.
I didn't want a long engagement.
Yeah, I didn't want a longengagement, and the only real
time that we were going to havebefore I graduated because I had
a very stringent schedule wasgoing to be in that two-week
space.
I think it was a two-week spaceI don't remember how long
colleges have between semestersand she said that I couldn't

(42:49):
even get married within the sameyear, so we were immediately
done.

Speaker 1 (42:54):
Yeah, I didn't realize that she was your
director.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
I was super immature and petty and I decided that I
was going.
Something is definitelycrawling on me.
What is happening over?

Speaker 3 (43:04):
there.

Speaker 2 (43:05):
It feels like an ant bite.

Speaker 1 (43:08):
You're getting haunted right now.

Speaker 2 (43:09):
I decided every day that I was going to be a petty
bitch and I was going to get me,yes, petty, right here.

Speaker 1 (43:15):
Petty bitch I was going to get me, yes, petty
right here team petty bitch teamlow road.
You guys have to understandsorry here at the don't make a
weird podcast.
While other people can take thehigh road in life, we take the
fucking low road.
So if you ever need someone totake the low road for you, you
guys can be mature adults.
We'll take the low road.

Speaker 2 (43:30):
All right, guys, my man sorry so um I decided yeah
that I going to be the pettybitch and I was going to get
married the day after her, but Iwas still going to be in her
wedding and I don't know if Ijust had a lack of ability to
confront somebody and be anhonest, upright person.
But please hold.

Speaker 1 (43:52):
There we go.
There it is That'll help outthat ant bite.

Speaker 2 (43:55):
But I, yeah, just dump it right on there.
Um, I was gonna do everythingthe day after her, for
everything.
So my engagement party was theday after hers oh my god, um, my
, and she had no idea about anyof it.
And my, um, what is it?
Bridal shower was the day afterhers.
Um, my rehearsal dinner was thesame night as her wedding.

(44:18):
Oh my God, tia.

Speaker 3 (44:21):
I had to turn it up because they're getting loud out
there, okay.

Speaker 2 (44:25):
And then my wedding was the day after her wedding.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (44:30):
And she knew nothing of it.
But at one point I had gotten anew phone and this was like, but
like where group chats werelike kind of not really.
They were kind of new in iphoneworld and I didn't realize that
if I had texted everybody, um,that I got a new number, that if
they responded to that that itwould go to everybody else, oh

(44:52):
no.
So I texted everybody and I waslike I got a new phone number
and she was on that group that Itexted and somebody sent back a
request because they had lostmy wedding invitation.

Speaker 1 (45:02):
No, not if she's about to find out she doesn't
know about that wedding.

Speaker 2 (45:06):
So I immediately was like what the fuck is a shoe?

Speaker 1 (45:10):
You were like what's in your shoe?

Speaker 2 (45:11):
Yeah, I asked her what was in my shoe and I
immediately um texted herseparately from that group.
Um, that was asking like tosend a new wedding invitation.
And I um texted her and I waslike, did you get that text
message?
And she was like, yeah, I did.
What is that about?
And I was like I have no idea,maybe they just assumed that
they were going to be invitedbecause I got engaged and like,

(45:33):
they just assumed there's awedding and they lost.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
You tried to play dumb, that was your move.

Speaker 2 (45:37):
She believed me because I'm a good liar.

Speaker 1 (45:39):
Oh no, this terrifies me too.

Speaker 2 (45:41):
Yeah.
So after that we had her like,we were like planning her
engagement party and everything,and life went on as planned.
She had no idea that I wasdoing everything the day after
Might I just add.
I was a phenomenal bridesmaid.
You were the best.
Put her first before everything.
I never, like, missed out onplans.
I was supportive.

(46:01):
I helped her through everything, even though she wouldn't let
me drink at her wedding.
What a bitch.
Yeah, I was underage, so Iprobably shouldn't have.

Speaker 1 (46:07):
Okay, that's important context.
Allegedly, that's fine,allegedly.

Speaker 2 (46:10):
Don't underage drink guys.
It drink guys.
It's wrong.
Um, so the night of her weddingI like left early, yeah, and
was like, hey, I'm, I just don'tfeel good, I gotta go.
Booked it to my rehearsaldinner and then didn't like text
her at all until the day of mylike the morning of my wedding,

(46:30):
and I just sent her a quick texttext message and I was like,
hey, by the way, the way I'mgetting married today, I'll see
you after your honeymoon.

Speaker 1 (46:37):
What was her reaction ?
To that, so she never responded, I never heard back from her,
so she ghosted from there on out.

Speaker 2 (46:42):
I was in every wedding picture and I know that
I ruined that.
So, like as an adult now that'smature I know that I ruined
that for her.
That really sucks and I amsorry about that.
But, and that really sucks andI am sorry about that.
But also don't tell me that Ican't get married in the same
year as you.
Bitch, yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:56):
No, that's fair.
I feel like that's a fair moveright there.

Speaker 2 (46:59):
Yeah, I've never heard from her again.

Speaker 1 (47:01):
RIP.
Hope she's doing well.
Yeah, I bet that marriage isfine.
I bet she's not totallycontrolling.
Honestly, yeah.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
It's just All.
Hold on, hold on.
Before you move on to the nextstory Bobo Bobo.
I just want to say hi to acouple people who are live on
our YouTube chat right now.

Speaker 2 (47:21):
Levi is there, Hi Levi.

Speaker 3 (47:22):
Levi Sean Frazier, we saw you.
Thanks for joining us.
Dude, A few of your friendsfrom your fantasy football draft
popped in to roast you for notdrafting properly.

Speaker 1 (47:33):
I've been mailing in this draft.
Man, it's not been a good draft.
I'm not going to win the leaguethis year.

Speaker 3 (47:39):
Our friend Rebecca Mickelson is in the chat.

Speaker 1 (47:44):
Hello Rebecca Becky, I give good hugs.
The hug yips are gone.
All right, I'm a great hugger,yeah, by the way by the way, he
gave some great hugs thisweekend.

Speaker 3 (47:52):
For those of you listening at home um daniel
daniel's redeemed.

Speaker 1 (47:56):
Yeah, I've been, I've been practicing for a lot of
years, people.
So here's the thing I've alwaysbeen told I'm a good hugger.
But then with dina, you know,because I'm like, I'm nervous, I
don't want to like offend,especially the first couple
times that we met, like I didn'tgo all in on the hug, it was a
tentative, it was a weak hug.
And so now she tells me all thetime I'm a terrible hugger.
And and now I've got thereputation that Daniel can't
give a proper fucking huganymore.
And I've been fighting this,fighting the mental battle to

(48:19):
improve my hugging.

Speaker 3 (48:20):
Becky did say that Dina's hug was better.

Speaker 1 (48:22):
Come on, are we doing this?
Let's do this.
Hold on, I'm sorry, I gotta hugmy guy here.

Speaker 3 (48:27):
We need to give a okay we're doing a live hug
right here.

Speaker 1 (48:29):
That's a good hug.
That's a good hug.
It's a subpar hug.

Speaker 3 (48:33):
Good hugger confirmed .

Speaker 2 (48:34):
It's a subpar hug.
A subpar hug.
Hug-demption Levi saysHug-demption, Hug-demption baby
he did give a good hug lastnight.
Yeah, when we were recording anepisode last night, I bared
witness to the glory.

Speaker 1 (48:51):
Yeah, yeah, good, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I she's like
hey, what's up?

Speaker 3 (48:53):
For those of you who don't know, daniel has to
literally leave directly fromhere to Washington DC to catch a
flight home.

Speaker 1 (48:59):
So I can go to work tomorrow bright and early.
Love having that nine to fivejob, baby, all right.
So I'm going to tell you guysone story quick, and this is
going to be normally Dina's, ourstoryteller.
We don't normally double up,but it's a special occasion.
I've been teasing this one fora bit.
I'm going to tell you guys thelog line.

Speaker 3 (49:16):
Just stay with me Just stay with me till the end.
Do you need to give a warningjust for the log line?

Speaker 1 (49:21):
Yeah, yeah, so this is the story about the time I
ejaculated in class, daniel Inclass, in class, all right, so
now we're going to go back intime.
Don't justify him with music.
I was in second grade I knowthis isn't getting better and we

(49:42):
had a.
We're reading Huckleberry Finn.

Speaker 3 (49:45):
Shut the fuck up, no.

Speaker 1 (49:47):
Reading Huckleberry Finn.

Speaker 3 (49:48):
How dare you name a story I ejaculated in class and
lead off with?
I was in the second grade?

Speaker 2 (49:54):
Yes, he's Ken sticking us.

Speaker 3 (49:57):
He's totally Ken sticking us.
He did say just stay with me.
Okay, go ahead.

Speaker 1 (50:03):
All right.
So we had a whole thing wherewe had to find vocab words from
the book and define them andpresent it in class.
Obviously, Mark Twain.
Some of these words havechanged their definitions over
the years, and so I found theword ejaculated.

Speaker 2 (50:20):
Is that actually?
Can somebody look that up?
Is that actually?
No, that's a real.
That's a real one.

Speaker 1 (50:26):
And so I didn't realize the context.
So I did that I used in asentence, turned it in I get a
call home, oh, I just sentence,turned it in.

Speaker 2 (50:34):
I get a call home.
Oh, I just remember there's adifferent definition for jacket.

Speaker 1 (50:36):
I'm so sorry go ahead and so uh, teacher calls, says,
uh, calls my mom's like hey,why don't you come after after
class?
Right now, you know, let's talkabout this and the sentence
that I used was I was so happy Iejaculated.
Um.
For you, the actual old-timeyversion of that is, ejaculate

(50:57):
was like making a loudexclamation making loud noises
out of your mouth.
So I technically defined theword properly and used it in a
sentence.

Speaker 2 (51:06):
My mom laughed uncontrollably at me and let's
keep in mind that his mom waslike a sex therapist.

Speaker 1 (51:12):
Yes, my mom was a sex therapist but, yeah, so she had
to explain to the teacher.
No, he, he looked up the wordand just didn't understand the
context.
So, uh, yeah, that was meejaculating all over class and
uh, embarrassing the shit out ofmy mom and she makes sure she
tells me about it every singleyear.
Uh, I'm a, I'm an author, babywow, beautiful, wonderful this

(51:36):
is I think.
I think this is gonna be themoment, dina.
Are you ready for magic?

Speaker 3 (51:41):
what's the magic that's, oh, I know it's yeah
every little bit of passion,sorry guys, I have to turn this
down because I know this isgonna be louder yeah, so we uh,
we have a segment every year,every uh episode, called cringy
copulation you have your script.

Speaker 1 (51:56):
Yeah, I, I do.
I'm just excluding a little bitof context.
We love writing, we love all ofthis stuff, but what we do is
every week we celebrate some ofthe worst erotic literature in
history, often selected by theliterary review of British
literary magazine in a segmentthat we call cringy copulation.
These are real excerpts fromreal books intended to be taken
seriously, and this week'sexcerpt will be read by Dina and

(52:19):
is from the 2005 winner GilesCorrin, and this is the book
Winkler, before we do this.

Speaker 3 (52:27):
This is explicit content, if that wasn't clear
already, so if you're not tryingto hear that right now, please
feel free to.

Speaker 1 (52:35):
We're not going to feel bad if you don't want to
hear it, but Dean's going to getsexy when you use that shower
voice.
He's going to get steamy andsultry.
You got beaten by too many ants.

Speaker 2 (52:44):
Yeah, all right.
And he came hard in her mouthand his dick jumped around and
rattled on her teeth and heblacked out and she took his
dick out of her mouth and liftedherself from his face and
whipped the pillow away and hegasped and glugged at the air
and he came again so hard thathis dick wrenched out of her

(53:06):
hand and a shot of it hit himstraight in the eye and stung
like nothing he had ever had inthere and he yelled with pain.
But the yell could have beenanything.
And as she grabbed at his dick,which was leaping around like a
shower dropped in an empty bath, she scratched his back deeply

(53:27):
with nails of both hands and heshot three more times in thick
stripes on her chest like aZorro.

Speaker 1 (53:35):
Like fucking Zorro baby, just like Zorro.
So Dina thoughts.

Speaker 2 (53:43):
Not everybody needs a voice.

Speaker 3 (53:47):
Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 (53:49):
And that's what I love about it is because
sometimes, as an author, we sitthere and we're like, oh my God,
these people are so incredible,like how could I ever be a real
author Because they're so good.
And then you read stuff likethat and we're like, oh my god,
these people are so incredible,like how could I ever be a real
author because they're so good.
And then you read the stufflike that.
You're like okay, maybe I canactually do it I could be an
author like I just want to knowwhat it was like for the editor
to go and be like all right,we're going to use uh zoro as an

(54:09):
analogy published right, yeah,that's a trad published, yeah,
so an editor, a professionaleditor, went in there and was
like accept.
This is how we write.
If you look up Giles Corrinquick, give us the quick.
This is a legitimate author.
This isn't like Chuck Tinglegiving us Space Raptor porn.

Speaker 3 (54:27):
It's not Chuck.

Speaker 1 (54:28):
Tingle.
Love Chuck Tingle, though Bigfan.
If you don't know Chuck Tingle,he's got some weird shit.

Speaker 3 (54:31):
Don't look him up.
Giles Corrin shit man.
Don't look him up.
Dallas corin is a britishcolumnist, food writer and
television radio presenter.
He's been a restaurant criticfor the times newspaper since
2002 and was named food anddrink writer of the year at the
british press awards in 2005 oh,so this is food advice.

Speaker 1 (54:46):
Yeah, so this is the man that walks into restaurants
and the entire kitchen panicsbecause his presence is there
and he can make or break themand, like Zorro, like fucking
Zorro and the main guy likeshoots in his own eye.
That's, that's skill.
Yeah, I mean, that's good aim,that's good so I mean, have you

(55:08):
guys ever, ever been involved inZorro?
Uh, sex play, is that?
Is that a normal?

Speaker 2 (55:14):
I don't think we should ask anybody about their
personal sex play.
I'm just kidding.
Fuck you, dude.
They didn't consent to that.

Speaker 1 (55:22):
No, that's fair.
Yeah, we can't, that wasdisgusting, but yeah, man.
So this has been a great littleepisode.
Hopefully we gave you a littletaste of what our podcast is
about.
And we got to hang out with somany guys, man, I'm telling you,
shocker cons, incredible.
We've met some favorite people,some friends, uh, people that
will hopefully be seen in thefuture.
Hopefully we'll see you guys inthe comments on a future just

(55:48):
erotic reads.
Um, dina, you have any, anythoughts or final?

Speaker 2 (55:51):
Why do you always do this to me?
Because you know I love puttingon a smile.

Speaker 1 (55:53):
I don't have any final thoughts.

Speaker 2 (55:54):
I just I'm going with it and you didn't feed me
anything.
So what am I supposed?

Speaker 1 (56:01):
to.
I'm glad to be here.
What else do you want me to saythat I'm handsome?
No, please You're not, I needyour validation.

Speaker 2 (56:09):
You don't need anybody's validation sweetie.

Speaker 1 (56:11):
But what about 80s hairband Sean?

Speaker 2 (56:13):
He doesn't need my validation either 80s hairband.
Sean, isn't real.

Speaker 1 (56:17):
It's in your mind, he can't hurt you anymore.
All right, guys, this has beenanother great episode of Don't
Make it Weird Again.
Follow us on all the socialmedia accounts.
You can leave us a voicemail ifyou had a good time.
If you want to be best friendswith the show, you can give us a
call at 347-6999-3473.
That's right.
So, dina, where can the folksfind you, buddy?

Speaker 2 (56:39):
You can find me on Wait, I got to get it right.
You can find me on threads atDinosaurusDMIW, and then you can
find me on Twitter atDinosaurusD.
That's D, like these nuts D.

Speaker 1 (56:48):
Got it.
And Producer Sean, where canthe folks find you, buddy you
can find me on Xcom at ChaseHoldu.
Yes, sir, and what are youhaving for dinner tonight, man?

Speaker 3 (56:57):
What are you making?

Speaker 2 (56:58):
us for dinner.

Speaker 3 (56:59):
I'm making Parmesan crusted chicken with tomato
basil aioli and mashed potatoes.

Speaker 1 (57:05):
Sean's a fucking professional cook.

Speaker 2 (57:06):
Yeah, highly highly recommend that I really thought
that Rance would have reacted tothat.

Speaker 1 (57:12):
Yeah, rance gave a little lick there.
So again, guys, check out allof our great friends that are
out here.
Check out all of our vendors.
See Shannon B Wright, she's outhere.

Speaker 2 (57:19):
Shout out to Legends of the Fog.

Speaker 1 (57:21):
Yes, legends of the Fog.
That is the coolest hauntedhouse thing that we've found out
here in Maryland man.
We've had some amazing people.
And one more time, who's oursoda?

Speaker 2 (57:29):
homies, last from the past, sodas and Sweets.
Try all sweets, try all oftheir selections, yes, and last
toy shop.

Speaker 1 (57:35):
That's another great friend of the show.
Man love those guys and uh, youcan find me on twitter at dan q
writes.

Speaker 3 (57:40):
Nobody asked oh, it's donk, it's d-a-n-q donk but
it's only writes things.

Speaker 1 (57:47):
Singular, because apparently I just write one
thing.
Uh, you can find me on threadsat daniel quigley, author, same
with instagram.
And uh, sean, if they want tocheck out our show website,
where can they find us?

Speaker 3 (57:56):
it's dmiwpodcastcom, or scan that big QR code on that
big obnoxious yellow bannerover there man, we love you all.

Speaker 1 (58:04):
Thank you guys so much for hanging out and
spending time with us.
You guys are the absolute bestwe're out of here.

Speaker 3 (58:08):
Jazz hands and thank you everyone on YouTube who
watched at home.
We love you all.

Speaker 1 (58:15):
We'll be back to our normally scheduled programming
soon, Soon, soon soon.