December 24, 2024 • 51 mins
(4:02) - Been playing The Little Drummer Boy Challenge?
(12:37) - Can Forman go back to his barber?
(24:24) - HEADLINES we can't make up, but CAN round up!
(37:47) - Dave sees Embro's Santas AND Mount Elgin's gingerbread men win an award!
(44:21) - YOUR comments & voice memos!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Should I go get a Christmas hat?I'll go get one.
If you want. Let me see if they'll throw I.
Might have to. You don't have to.
You don't have to. I only did this because I, you
know, I just thought, well, it'sthe last.
I can hear the hat. Or does it make noise?
No, I'm. Just.
Oh, you're going to hear mine soon.
Oh God. We're all going to have hats.
(00:21):
Merry Christmas. Why do you look at like me like
that? That's funny.
I don't think you get any. Like when for voice overs does
anybody ask you to be Santa? No, nobody asked.
I didn't think. So, oh, here comes my Santa hat.
(00:42):
Don't come in here. close your eyes.
There's gifts in here. Thank you. close your eyes and
walk. Don't look down.
Look up at the ceiling. Now leave.
It's Jeremy. Look.
Don't hit your head, Jeremy. Oh.
(01:06):
I've got a cup of cheer. A cup of cheer?
I don't, but I do have a hat. Look at our festive hats today.
And I have Terry Clark's Jingle Bells still.
Oh, good for. You recently.
Actually, well done. Well, a long.
Time ago that we had her in on Christmas we had to read the
(01:26):
show before Christmas so we likelast day of school or something
and she did Christmas carols with us.
This is due to underwhelming demand.
Felice Dhabi podcast. Felice Dhabi podcast, Yes.
That's us. We are Dave Ray Children
foreman, getting along as usual with our festive hats.
(01:47):
Yeah, say we have the same one, me and Dave.
Yeah, not on YouTube. They sound great do.
They ever. I just want to let you know that
I have so many of these. Christmas hats?
Santa hat, Yeah. Because.
Everyone. We used to do the lighting and
the lights over here with Nick Paparello.
Come on, come on, Nick, Nick, Nick would do.
(02:09):
And every time we would show up,I would have a Santa hat stuffed
in my coat somewhere just in case I needed, you know, to put
the sand. But they would always do.
You remember, Rachel, they always gave us Santa hats and
said, oh, no, no, keep. And I would go, well, here, you
can have it back. Oh, no, keep it.
And, you know, actually, once you put it on, you're not giving
it to anybody else. I mean, you really shouldn't
(02:30):
anyways. If you're a a taxpayer in the
City of London, thank you very much.
This is where your tax dollars go.
I have a few of them floating around my house too.
They got all kinds of them. It was.
Nice. Because they would.
I don't. I have a child's one.
Because they apparently we they could only splurge on two extra
hats and not a third. Ever.
I was never ever on that stage once.
(02:53):
No, ever. You ever?
Met No No. There were so many people on
that stage with us like it was it was just like everybody in
their kid was up there all the I.
Don't know why it's come on a Christmas.
Band really know what was going on.
I wouldn't show up and they had sort of a thing that they were
all doing, but Nick kind of ran the whole show because they did
it on TV and so whatever he saidlike come on out I'm like OK,
(03:15):
don't come out OK, I'll just keep my hat.
By the way, there's hot chocolate and cookies downstairs
so I'm fine leave me alone anyway, I enjoyed it.
I always enjoyed doing the and. I.
Got lots of Christmas hats so thank you very much.
Yeah, sounds great. We have them.
Sorry Forman, it was between this or I have antlers with a
bell today. There you go.
(03:37):
That's not that's a terrible bell foreman's.
Got a little decorative? Foreman's got real.
That's a bell. That's a bell.
OK. All right.
This is a bell too. Are you done?
Is that you done or no? Are you going to keep going?
Well, yes, I'll keep. I'll talk about Christmas and
Christmas songs. So every year, no.
I'm not the sort of segue. I'm just I OK, fine.
(04:00):
Just keep going. Just keep.
The songs every year three of uswould play the Little Drummer
Boy challenge, and if you haven't done this, it's
basically whoever whoever you try and avoid hearing the song
Little Drummer boy I mean, you can't really it's just the.
Goal is to avoid. Hearing it just happens.
To you, some people might play Whammageddon this time of year.
(04:22):
Yes. To avoid last, it's impossible.
To avoid last, it's impossible. Well now everybody has a version
of of Last Christmas now too, asthey do with Little Drummer Boy.
So I was I the 1st to hear Little Drummer Boy or was that
day this year? Was.
Who? Who did you hear?
I don't know what version you heard, but I'd never heard of
(04:44):
whoever did it. I'll look it up as you talk
here. It was something just.
Terrible. And then about.
Look mine up too. No, I know yours because about
two weeks later, maybe a week and a half, Rachel sends a photo
of what were you listening to? Serious.
Your car is serious. In your car?
Yeah, she's she's listening to Little Drummer Boy by Jim
(05:07):
Neighbors. Jim Neighbors, yeah.
You pay money to have serious feed you Jim neighbors.
Yeah, Little Drummer Boy the. Ant at least my torture was for
free from David Bowie and Bing Crosby on at least fresh.
Radio. Yeah, that's, that's a standard
too. Sure.
And the worst version. I don't know why people love
(05:28):
that. I don't know.
But he actually had a couple of versions that you might hate
because after gym neighbors. Please give me gym neighbors
after Bing from. Saving and you're going to have
this discussion, but I am, I'm going to assure you at this
point I have not yet heard the little drum.
I have a voice and really. So you have this.
Is for sure now we are recordingthis before but this this
(05:51):
podcast is released on ChristmasEve and God help me, I hope I'm
still avoiding the Little Drummer void by Christmas Eve.
Well, you've already won. For anybody that doesn't
understand why, if it's your favorite Christmas song, have at
it. Enjoy.
I don't know where that song came from.
I don't know why it exists. I don't really like it.
(06:11):
I never did like it. It just was.
At one point you just sort of accepted, well, it's Christmas
and I have to listen to this, but you don't.
I always used to get, oh, you'rea drummer, so you must love the
Little Drummer Boy Christmas. I don't.
Do you the? Reason.
The reason? I feel the opposite actually.
Yes. I always see those memes and
(06:32):
it's like Mary haven't just given birth to our Lord awakes
to find a small boy with a drummer.
Yeah, no, it didn't happen. He wasn't there.
Heart. The Herald Angels did sing, but
there was no drummer. There was no drummer.
(06:54):
No, there was. No, they were.
Inviting them, they were welcome.
No, right? There was no drummer there.
And when you recorded Christmas song and you are a name
performer like I wonder if BruceSpringsteen has ever regretted
doing Santa Claus's Coming to town live because I feel like
I've that's. The only version that's ever
played. I know, I feel like I heard it.
(07:14):
Did he? Do a recorded version because I.
Would like to do that. He did it the smartest way
possible because you did. You performed it once and they
recorded it and then you didn't have to do the whole studio
treatment. None of that.
It was so smart anyway. Yeah, you know you.
Get paid forever if. Bob Seger, when you were
deciding which Christmas song you would put your stamp on.
(07:39):
Yeah, Bob Seger, who I have a great deal of respect for, you
know, and, and from the Detroit area, for some reason, he did
Little Drummer Boy. What's wrong with the Bob we
used to have? And I know that there's been
some radio stations sold, so we're here in the London area.
And Foreman, your radio station does not do the whole all
(07:59):
Christmas thing. We have, well we're HD Radio and
on our HD Channel 2 is 100%. Christmas music.
All right. Well.
It is. I would say it's very tasteful.
It sticks to the classics. It doesn't get what you want.
Version. And when I say classics, that
doesn't mean Little Drummer Boy.It it's not about 50% Canadian
(08:20):
original an old Christmas music like there is on some other
radio station in London. Yeah.
What's that mean? Is it fresh?
Is it fresh because there used to be the other radio station,
but they've been sold and they're not doing it this year.
Their Christmas music? Little way better.
Yes, way way. Yeah, whoever.
Like there's two. Yeah, whoever was chimed that
(08:40):
together was doing a great job. But on Chime, they're doing a
great job. Is it Chime?
OK, fine. That's right and I'm correct.
That's Rogers Radio. Yes, and I'm sure in Halifax
Move is the one that does 100% Christmas music.
I'm sure it's perfectly acceptable.
I'm telling you, I'm telling youwhat the guys that are doing,
whoever's doing that, you know, they do hit like it's the
(09:01):
weirdest stuff 'cause you will hear like Frank Sinatra doing
Jingle Bell and then you'll hearWhite Christmas by Bing Crosby
and then all of a sudden you'll hear this morning, I think the
Payolas Christmas is coming. You ever heard that one?
It's horrible. I don't know.
It should never be played. It's.
(09:21):
Probably not as bad as Sean Kingston, Little Drummer Boy.
I'm pretty sure it is. Kingston Little drummer boy,
it's it's like. Paola they the reason they're
they're feeding you the Paolas. And who are some of the other
Kim Stockwood? You know who Kim Stockwood is?
Yeah, she has a career every December, thanks to Fred.
Yes, I heard hers the other day.Because they're Canadian.
(09:41):
They need, yeah, they need to play.
You Canadian. True, you don't need to play
that much. Canadian Well, they don't need
to play the payolas doing Christmas is coming ever again.
Guys are so into it, most peoplewould not even notice.
You know I don't need to. Hear it was I've heard the
Little Drummer Boy a million times, and Dave won our
challenge. The end.
That was my point. Yeah, the other point is, what
(10:04):
are you doing listening to Jim Naver's Little Drummer?
Well, I wasn't trying to, OK, really was trying not to, and I
was bummed that I lost this year's challenge.
So that's got to be worse. Unless the Paolas did it.
I don't know, maybe. Rocking around the Christmas
tree at the Christmas party house.
(10:25):
Mistletoe hung where you can seeevery couple tries to stop
rocking around the Christmas tree.
Let the Christmas spirit ring. Later we'll have some pumpkin
pie and we'll do some caroling. You will get a little feeling
(10:48):
when you're here. Voices singing Let's be jolly.
The halls with thousands highly rocking around the Christmas
tree. Have a happy holiday.
Hey everyone dancing there running in the new oh fashion
(11:14):
way. Excellent.
Excellent. Thank you.
Great. You are hired to play kazoo in
my band. Excellent.
Job, I'm about to hear you losers.
(11:37):
This is due to underwhelming demand with Dave, Rachel and
Foreman podcasted around the Christmas tree at the Christmas
party hall. Everybody sing.
Everybody sing. Podcast and.
Around. The Christmas?
Yeah. OK, never mind.
Don't podcast. Please don't see hop.
No. Why?
Let's not that's not Don't forget about our website by the.
(11:58):
Way that sings. No, we're not underwhelming.ca
Go to our website, we need sponsors.
We need sponsors, but there's lots of things to do on on our
website because we've been slowly building it up.
You can leave us a voice messageso we could play it on our show.
You could buy us a coffee. You can check out Dave's blogs.
(12:19):
You can check out our host BIOS.I don't know, I put Oh, and one
of the blogs is behind the scenes photos of our live show
if you haven't looked at that yet.
Behind the scenes so. Yeah, yeah.
You can check out sponsorship info, you can send us a message,
you can, you know, all kinds of stuff out there.
So but I cannot. Yeah, I cannot book myself a
haircut. That's a segue.
(12:42):
We don't offer that service, no.Segue out of nowhere.
Even with my guy I did just get my haircut because someone else
that I live with demanded it happen.
But even my regular guy for several weeks leading up to
Christmas now has been booked like a can't.
You can't get in because everyone wants a haircut for
Christmas. Yes.
(13:02):
Yeah, I don't want a haircut. For you.
I just had one yesterday. I would like I would like to
have hair to cut. Did you notice?
IO No, it did not notice, but itlooks great, did you?
Are wearing a hat. I got my hair done yesterday.
Yeah. Did you?
I'm wearing a hat. Yes, I did.
How much did that cost? Quite a bit.
Quite a bit more than what Foreman would pay.
(13:24):
Without knowing either amount, you are very correct.
You are very correct. And quite a bit more time spent
in the chair too. I.
Yeah, I'm there for about 3 hours, 3 hours, yeah, every
time. But I only go like hours 3-4
times a year so. That's Ashley's excuse, too.
I don't go that often. Yeah, it still doesn't even out.
It does. Not even.
(13:44):
It never evens out. And it is like 3 or 4 hours when
she goes there. It looks beautiful and love it
so much. Work it better, Of course you
better say that, right? Yeah, it looks great, Rach.
Thanks you guys. Never noticed.
You've never noticed. Now you've never noticed before.
We would always notice each others though.
Yes, I would. Always when you, I don't know
why it's so much more obvious when you guys get haircuts, it's
(14:08):
like so much shorter. Because the whole.
Point I feel like when you get ahaircut at one point in my life,
I think, and I know some people who are like this now, men, OK,
that when you go for a haircut, you don't want anybody to
notice. Did you got a haircut?
I'd rather not. Yeah, some.
Some are so regimented that their hair low always looks
(14:28):
exactly the same way they. Want to look exactly the same?
That's the whole purpose of scheduling a haircut.
Maybe every three. Weeks if you want.
Anybody. Yeah, where makes sense now for
me, I'm like, shave it, go ahead, dodge more of it off.
I don't care. Yeah, it's a lot easier to deal
with when you do that. Right, so I shaved Jeremy's
(14:50):
head. I'm his Barber.
Well, that's a lot easier. Yeah, yeah, I have to put myself
in. How is he a good tipper?
No, Nope. He's just like, OK, thanks.
Like, hey, you can put the razoraway, then the Clippers.
That's it. Anyway, so you got a haircut for
me. Oh, he didn't get a haircut.
(15:11):
He can't get a haircut. No, I did.
I did. It's not long.
Wait a minute, problem. Is.
It first needs a haircut, you notice 'cause it's quite nuffy,
yes. It was getting puffy and shaggy,
yeah. I don't know, I don't, I don't
have that issue. Yeah, it's so thick that you
can't. You can fill it with product,
whatever, and at the end of the day, it's just as like a clown
(15:32):
wig no matter what. Yeah.
You know what? I know that you don't like that,
but you are blessed. That's it's.
It's a guess. I'd rather have this problem
than the opposite problem. Yeah, it is a terrible thing to
have a full head of hair, Foreman.
I just, I wish I could give you some Dave.
Yeah. Wow.
All I want for Christmas is Foremans problem.
(15:52):
Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I couldn't get it my the little barbershop I've I've
found in Saint Thomas. Yeah, and the guy I go to and.
What is the what is the guy you go to?
What is he? What's the typical foreman do
cost? It's like 35 bucks plus tax.
How much does your hair cost your haircut, Dave?
(16:12):
It's not that much. Well, my place.
Is nice. He gets it.
He has a little machine and he and he gets at this hot shaving
cream that he puts on your neck and he does the neck thing and
yeah, it's nice. It's a good little process.
Yeah, that's worth the extra. Yeah, it might be worth 30.
Five treats you. That's nice.
And he's like a real Barbie. He, he's either the manager or
the owner of this place, too. He knows what he's doing.
(16:34):
So I found that, you know, go right to the top and he's my
guy. Absolutely.
Get in with them because before Christmas, everyone, and I
misspoke earlier, not everyone wants to get a haircut.
Everyone's being told that they have to get a haircut.
So I was one of those, yeah, couldn't get in.
And you can book online and there's options to join waiting
lists for times and want. So I joined the waiting list for
(16:56):
like a week and a half, never got a call so I just.
You're on the waiting list. For a haircut, I know, but
there's lots of people that workthere and they always say your
walk insurance welcome. And whenever I'm there, people
just walk in off the street and someone's available and we'll
cut their hair, whatever. So I walked in.
And. There's a guy that wasn't busy,
so he started cutting my hair and then my regular guy is there
(17:19):
and I thought, oh, I well, at least I know that he's there.
He can tell this other guy what he does.
Because. The new guy's asking, what do
you want done? I'm like, ask him.
He knows, yeah. Exactly, Yeah.
My regular guy tells him and halfway through my haircut
another person walks in the doorand says oh hey, hi, whatever.
(17:40):
Obviously to see my regular guy,but it's clear that it's for the
time frame after mine. Like I'm there at 9:00, this
guy's there at like 920, obviously ready for a 930 and my
guy hasn't been doing anything the whole time.
And my guy says, well, it's great.
(18:01):
You know, it's great that you came in early.
We could start right now becauseI had a no show.
What, so you could have had yourguy?
I could have had my guy the whole time.
But he didn't. He was probably waiting for the
client. And then you sat down with the
other guy. Maybe, maybe, maybe.
I don't know. Was he annoying?
If you were with the. Different.
(18:22):
No, he was not. What is a foreman?
Because does your guy not want to do your hair foreman?
And does Foreman just switch guys in the same establishment?
Yeah, maybe. I think it was just very a
misunderstanding. Very, very.
No. I don't know.
I I. Don't think there's anything to
that do. You.
Oh, I sure do. No, that's the thing if.
(18:44):
The guy had a no show. Foreman walks in looking for a
haircut like I'm just I walk in out of the blue.
The guy, his regular guy has a no show and gives Foreman to
another guy. No, no, no, no.
Were you? A Barber shop.
Were you already sitting down with the new guy when this other
client walked in to get the new show?
But I. Lost the 930 guy, not the 9:00
(19:05):
guy, Yeah. But if the if your regular guy
was expecting a 9:00 and you walked in at 9:00, well, he's
expecting someone else. He didn't know that they were
going to be a nose. Shop I walked in at like 910.
Oh, like I wasn't there at an exact appointment time because I
did have an appointment. By 910, the 9:00's not showing
exactly. Orman shows there's somebody,
(19:25):
they're both free and Foreman's regular guy doesn't do Foreman.
Foreman, I'd be. AI don't know, maybe he gave 20
minutes before he knew it was a no show.
Switch guys for me. Really.
I think that's a nothing thing, no?
I I keep is. This something or nothing?
It's nothing. I I think.
It's something too. Definitely something.
But what does foreman do? Switch.
(19:47):
Do I switch with the new? Guy I guess like.
Yes, because maybe the old guy now will be offended if you make
an appointment with the new guy.Old guy probably doesn't care if
he's the owner, he's getting paid anyway.
He doesn't care if you book withhim or not.
But then maybe all the more reason why I should I gave the
new guy a bigger tip than normal.
Yes. Because I was mad.
(20:08):
Now that'll do it. Now I I think you better find.
They're going to talk. About I, I think you better find
a new place. I can't go to the place at all
now. Yeah.
Would you like? You can.
I really, I don't think it's a big deal.
Oh, I think it's a huge deal. I can't.
Even want my haircut in the first place.
Yeah. What a tip.
He tipped the other guy more than than his regular.
(20:29):
It's a deal. It's really.
A deal, It's a deal. I simply must go.
Baby, it's cold outside. The answer is no.
But baby, it's cold outside. The welcome has been how lucky
that you drop so nice and warm. Look out the window.
(20:50):
And that's my sister will be stuff because Joshua so
delicious. My brother will be there at the
door. Waves upon a tropical shore.
Me Nan's mind is vicious. Joshua's are delicious
cigarettes. Never such a get home.
Maybe you'll freeze out there. Take lend me your cold up to
(21:14):
your knees out there. You've really been grand when
you touch my hand. Don't you see?
How can you do this thing? You're bound to be taught too
much. Thank you.
My life long, so there'll be plenty.
And fine if she got pneumonia and I can't stay over that old
(21:36):
house. Baby, it's cold.
Baby, it's cold outside. All right, I'll stay for a beer.
You didn't bring your own? No.
This is due to underwhelming demand with a Rachel and
(21:56):
Foreman. Just hear those sleigh bells
jingling ring Ting tingling too.Come on, it's lovely weather for
a podcast together with you, am I right?
Right back at you, David. I'm telling you.
Right now and. Foreman, let me ask you, I don't
know about you, but are you? You know, I've been enjoying
(22:17):
every my nuts roasting by an open fire.
Yeah, yes, That was one of the great things about Christmas on
the radio. You could say things like that
and almost and almost get away with it.
Yes, OK, Someone would always beupset, even though I don't know
how you could be, but someone always would be.
You'd always. Get well.
(22:38):
People were upset about everything.
Because I happen to be Speaking of nuts, I happen to be.
Before I go any further, That's the segue by the way, is.
It OK. Yeah, well, I, my name's on the
Amazon account here in the in the Collins household.
So I get emails. I get all the emails from if
people are ordering, if they're ordering gifts for me, if
(23:00):
they're ordering gifts for anybody, I get the emails
saying, Oh yeah, we got your order, we got this.
Here's something. Do you get those emails from
Amazon? Here's something you might.
I'm the one that gets them. Here's something that you might
like. And last week or two, a week and
a half ago, I got an e-mail and I just went, here's something
I'm so tired of them. Here's something, you know, like
I'm scrolling through my emails,delete, delete, and I see here's
(23:20):
something you might like. Happy nuts.
And I went what, what, what, what?
That sounds like a good idea. Who?
Wouldn't want happiness. Yes, and.
I don't want sad nuts. No, exactly.
No, you don't want unhappy nuts.You you want happy nuts.
So hats off to the happy nuts people who create.
I don't know. I think it's some sort of cream.
(23:42):
I hope. I think I started it because
you're nuts. Who doesn't want happy nuts?
Oh, it actually is for an. I'm happy, Yeah.
Still waiting to hear what happened.
I've seen. It is what it is.
It's something. It's a cream or something.
Yeah, I've seen it on Crees on. And if you didn't buy it and put
it in Jeremy's stocking, what's wrong with you?
Well, I didn't, but I might haveto now that you've mentioned it
'cause I think that. Would be funny.
(24:02):
No one wants sad nuts. Well, yes, and that the truth.
Like everyone, every man should have their.
Everyone with nuts should have this.
If you got nuts, you need them to stay cheery, you want them.
Holly and jolly you want. Them to be jolly, that's.
Right, that's you're nuts, Hollyand Jolly, they're happy nuts.
(24:22):
Well, it's time for headlines. Speaking of.
Well, this is our this is our final podcast of 2024.
Can you? Tell, can you tell I figure we
should wrap up with a few headlines, Am I right?
Yes, I'm right. These are actual, these are
(24:43):
actual headlines, real headlines.
I don't make these up. I don't have to.
No, it's I, I don't have to. I do get contributions.
Again, thank you, Foreman, for contributing a a couple of the
headlines out of there coming up.
OK. I appreciate it.
Oh, somebody sent one that I forgot to pass along to.
You. You should have sent that one to
me. Well, maybe next.
Episode Next. Year I do headlines I'll get.
(25:05):
Next year, yeah. Here we go, New Zealand man wins
Spanish Scrabble championships despite not speaking Spanish.
Real headlines. Wow.
Excellente. Celente.
Unfalis, Navidad. I've had these Navidad.
He's got happy nuts. That's right, You know how many
(25:26):
points you would get for that inScrabble?
At least Navidad, yeah, you get a lot with a zed in there.
Yeah, Zed. Yeah, Czech man fails to win
right to smile on his driver's license photo ID.
Well, it's. Czech man.
Yeah, Czech. Czech Republic.
Yeah. Headlines.
OK, yeah, I thought you meant like a check mark.
I was like, well. Who's the check?
(25:47):
Who's the? Check Mark.
Me ZECHE. Also a high score scrubble.
Sure. Yeah, that's true.
Mosh pit diaper designed to avoid long lines at concert
bathrooms sells out. No.
Of course. That's an actual headline.
Yeah, that's disgusting. I believe it.
(26:07):
Nobody wants to stand in that. Put it in Jeremy's stocking with
his happy nuts. He'll be.
He'll be thrilled. So I.
Probably get sworn out on Christmas morning.
Scientists may have discovered anew form of ancient humans known
as large head people. Think Neanderthals.
(26:28):
Real headlines. But larger, they're large.
By the way, my sister did 23andMe and we found that we or
she, not me, is part Neanderthal.
That has nothing to do with anything.
Yeah, large headed people from does your.
Sister have a large head. No, no, not for no.
(26:49):
No particular. No, we've evolved since then,
Dave. That's.
OK. She doesn't live in Cape Breton.
Columbus Funeral Home to be the first in the state to operate
with a liquor license. That's a good idea.
Headlines. How is that a first?
(27:10):
No one likes to go into funerals, but if there's an open
bar. Yes, absolutely.
In I didn't. Know your uncle, but I'm coming.
It's a celebration of life, exactly.
This is going to happen. That's the best news.
Ever. Absolutely.
They should have liquor and beer.
Right fart coin breaks above the800 million market cap.
(27:33):
What? That's an actual headline.
I'm not making that up. What is this such a thing as
fart coin? Fart coin and.
It's almost yes, it's almost at a billion.
Like should have bought stock. You should have bought fart
coin. It's a joke apparently, but it.
Every time you make a transaction.
Yeah. They send you a digital fart
(27:54):
sound effect. So you sign up for this and you
pay for that. It's fart coin.
It's like Bitcoin, you buy it. Fart coin instead, because it's
fart coin. Bart Coin is going.
It's selling. And then you own the sounds, the
fart sounds, or. Something we're not.
It's explaining blockchain. We're not we're not going to do
cryptocurrency here. OK, Right.
(28:15):
All right, you don't get it. No, I.
Don't. We'll move on.
You'll get this one. It's.
Worth a lot more than hawk to a coin, that's for sure.
That's. That's a coin, yeah.
That's a coin. Might be landing her in jail
coin. Boy Usus City tells residents to
stop sticking googly eyes on itsstatues.
No. Real headlines.
(28:36):
More googly. Eyes.
That's funny. I love that is.
Funny googly. Eyes are.
Always funny, that's. Always funny, that's.
Always funny. Always.
Where is that? Which city does it say?
Somewhere in Oregon, I don't know.
OK, I love. Stop, stop jumping in front of
oncoming cars, South African government warned citizens.
(28:57):
That's that's very morbid. Headlines.
Yes, why? Why are they doing too soon?
Too soon. Doing that, yeah.
Stop doing that. Is it like some sort of
insurance scam? I don't know, I have no idea,
Maybe I didn't. I just felt like such a good
headline, I didn't want to delveany further, no.
As as most of them seem to be. Yes, in that Caterpillar.
(29:18):
That's right. Fair enough.
Woman who heard animal noises from under her house had naked
man living there. He had no clothes and was living
under the house well. That's that's an actual
headline. That's not.
Something anybody wants to find under the house, I wouldn't
think if you're. Living under the house, I mean.
I guess I'm not surprised you don't have clothes.
(29:39):
Yeah, what? I guess you don't.
Well. Now your mouse doesn't seem so
bad now, does it? No.
Yeah, that's such a bad. Fact.
Haven't found another one, thankGod.
Plane grounded for five days after 130 hamsters escaped from
their cages. The last.
On the plane. Yeah, that wouldn't be fun.
No. Real headlines.
(29:59):
Well, it's not as bad as Snakes on a Plane, but.
If you unleash the snakes now, it would get rid of the
hamsters. Anyway.
That's true. Two emus Emus named Thelma and
Louise on the run in South Carolina.
I don't know why. I just like that.
Yeah. Of course.
Yeah. Headlines.
What did they think was going tohappen when they named the emus
(30:22):
Thelma and Louise? I love that.
Yeah, exactly. I followed this one woman on
TikTok and she's got a emu farm.Emu farm or anyway, and or maybe
it's an ostrich. What's the difference?
Well, they're different. Nobody knows.
I don't know anyway, the the bird that she has is named
Karen, and Karen's a real bitch to her and it's so funny to see
(30:44):
her deal with Karen the ostrich or the emu.
So. I'm like, what that stuff?
Side note. Sounds like it.
Thanks continue. Thank you.
Great story. This smuggler caught with 320
tarantulas strapped to his body.EW, gross.
IPhone, Yeah. That's an actual headline.
I have a local headline. Thank you to Foreman.
Courtesy of Foreman. Local headline.
(31:05):
Local headline drug dealer nabbed by police while going
through Wendy's drive through inSimcoe.
Just got to make a bit stop. Real headline.
That's right, it's even worse because he was in the back of a
cab. He was a Dr. thru cab with.
The police fault they were following him with.
(31:26):
The gas, I don't know. Did the cabbie know?
I was. Wouldn't have known.
I have a subsection of headline Christmas headlines because.
It's yeah, that's. Exactly.
Santa Claus helps nab car theft suspect in Jefferson County.
Headline. Wow, way to go Santa.
Yeah, he knows if you've been naughty or nice.
(31:47):
You know what? I'm saying yeah, he sure does.
Yeah, Reverend's Santa sermon ruins Christmas for sobbing
school pupils. That's not very nice.
What woolly? That's an actual headline.
Should have asked them to come and speak at the Christmas.
Good grief, that's worse than our last podcast.
(32:09):
Man gets stuck in chimney while fleeing from police.
I think that could be a Christmas headline.
I'm just saying. Yes.
Real headlines, yeah. Doesn't say Christmas, but.
You're probably, you know, I have a feeling.
You know who? Else spins down the chimney.
Well, exactly, I could do it. Buckingham Palace maid arrested
after drunken brawl at work Christmas party.
(32:30):
That's a great headline. That's one of my favorite
headlines. Headlines.
Yeah, there's a lot there to unpack.
I think we all want. To know what happens?
Well, I guess we do know what happens at the Buckingham Palace
Christmas party. Another.
Local Christmas headline courtesy Forum.
Thank you. Forum and Local 1 here.
Here we go. Saint Thomas woman punches Santa
(32:52):
Claus for blocking her parade view.
Yeah, that's right. That's an actual headline.
At the Saint Thomas parade. Yes, it was 25% more Grinches.
Yes. I'm here to see the Santa Claus
parade. Get out of my way.
Santa. Not only what's that local news,
(33:13):
but it also ended up on TMZ. It was on TMZ.
Of course. This is so ridiculous.
Yes, yeah. All right, we have time for a
couple of Florida's. Here we go off the floor.
Hey, plants, but no pants. Florida Maine gardens in the
nude. Real headline.
Yeah, well. Of course, of course, he's just
hotter than stink down right? Florida Man, by the way, gets
(33:34):
naked in Uber after getting a feeling.
A feeling. Yeah, I just had this feeling.
To get naked. Yeah, headlines.
What was the feeling of the driver?
Unhappy. That's another headline.
Unhappy nuts. Yeah, sad.
Nuts. Sad nuts.
Florida man accused of threatening person with Molotov
(33:58):
cocktail and a sword to make a point.
Point me. Yeah.
That's an actual headline. You're not exactly the one you
thought you were making, but. Made one.
We all know you're crazy now. Yes, Florida man wearing blue
bonnet and flowery dress allegedly steals 28 cans of baby
(34:20):
formula from Publix. Real.
Headlines I don't. Think I need to focus on what
this man's wearing. It sounds nice.
Probably match well the. Bonnet.
Really. You want to wear a dress?
Fine. It's the bonnet that really had
me. But then he stole the baby
formula so that that makes sense.
Did he think that babies get theformula for free?
(34:42):
They go shopping for themselves.I do not know, Florida Man
Florida man who lied about identity, arrested after
forgetting who he said he was. Headlines, naturally.
It's a really good one. You just have to sit.
And make sure you know the story.
Yeah, you may want to listen to that one again.
I'm not doing it twice, but that's there's a lot to unpack,
(35:04):
right? Half naked Florida man high on
meth breaks into home, steals carpet cleaner that checks I
think. It's an actual headline.
Finally, Matt. That's just if they had had a
crocodile, he would have stolen that too.
I'm pretty sure. Probably.
Yes, yeah, again, mess smoking Florida Man attacks mattress in
(35:24):
jealous rage. Attacks the mattress.
Just. He's jealous of the mattress.
What goes on between a man and his mattresses?
Between the man and his mattresses.
That's. Right.
Yeah, Well, OK. Maybe not a Matt case.
Yeah, right. One more.
Here we go. Last one Florida Man plastic
surgeon known as doctor downtown.
(35:47):
Speaking of happy nuts. Florida.
Man. Plastic surgeon known as doctor
downtown loses license over tragic Brazilian butt lift
death. Oh death, My goodness.
Headlines and. That's how we're ending the
year. That's exactly.
Tragic Brazilian butt lift by doctor downtown.
(36:29):
Wow, you guys are? Amazing.
We do it all, Dave. We do it all.
(36:51):
Christmas. Merry Christmas.
Oh, the mic dropping. Yeah, 3 mic.
Drop. That was a big finish.
Actually, I was. I was proud of us if.
You're gonna go out, That's how you go up.
(37:45):
The this is due to underwhelmingdemand.
It's Dave, Rachel and Foreman. This is the podcast in a Pear
tree, just in time for Christmas.
Yes, I like that one podcast. In a pear tree, by the way, I
middle of the day we happened tofind ourselves very close to
embro. And I said to my wife, we need
(38:05):
to drive through embro. I need to drive through embro.
I forgot they have, they've got the Santa Clauses.
Yeah, Genesis to do. I said they sure do.
Well, then we have to go. It was delightful.
It it was worth all of the hype,these Santa Clauses.
And you got them where you got them?
Home Hardware, Right. They were Home Hardware, which
(38:27):
you didn't like Rachel, But I'm telling you right now, if they
if they weren't all the same Santas, it just wouldn't work.
So like, they are all the exact same Santas and they're
everywhere. They're over 200.
Yeah, I only went down the Main Street and you, they're
everywhere is awesome. And I'm there in the daytime.
(38:48):
I'm sure at night when they're all lit up they look great.
Yeah. Oh, they do.
They ever. I think it it's a great idea,
it's a great community thing to do.
I just don't, I don't love that it's it was brought about by the
retail store. They raised like $9000.
It worked. Absolutely.
They raised all that money. I was talking to the women who
(39:10):
were spearheading the Mount Elgin gingerbread men.
Yeah. How'd that go?
Yeah. Situation.
Right. Well, both those towns and the
inflatable snowmen in Folden as well.
Folden. Folden, Zoya, all, and there was
quite a few. I guess for for an intersection.
They've done pretty well with the drive for sure.
(39:31):
Even the Township of Southwest Oxford had a Christmas lights
competition. And you know how when I first
mentioned the gingerbread men situation and the woman who
alerted me to what they were doing on Heart FM was the woman
who also didn't want to partake?Yeah, I'm a snowman lover.
(39:51):
I would have totally been all inon a snowman.
Her house won the Christmas lights prize from the Township,
which included several gingerbread men.
Wow, good. For her.
Yeah, and the women who organized the whole thing are a
little bit miffed. So she didn't want to partake in
(40:12):
the gingerbread. Thing she didn't.
She's alerted me to the fact that the town was trying to do
everyone get an inflatable gingerbread man just because she
doesn't like inflatables. Did not want to participate.
Turns out she won the Township Christmas light contest for her.
Yes, Anita, who called in originally the one that doesn't
(40:33):
want the gingerbread. You have got to be kidding.
No, it's her and her display is a Wiener dog eating free light
up gingerbread like a little one.
We did. We won for most original.
So there's 3 zip tied together and there's one in the mouth of
(40:55):
a dash hound, a light up dash hound, Christmas lawn ornaments.
So we won on that. So Miss I Don't Like Gingerbread
Men won an award for having three of them. 443 running away,
3 running away from the from thedash hound and one in the dash
(41:16):
hound's mouth getting eat. Do you even have a single
snowman in your display? I absolutely do.
He had the snowman is standing there with the leash around the
dash hound. OK, so the snowman's walking the
dog. Who's eating the gingerbread
man, Correct. I mean, I like it.
It does still conflict with yourprevious comments though.
(41:37):
Hey, we compromise. We got these miniature
gingerbread masks, you know, so we are still in the spirit and
supporting the community. Yeah, I love those are I like
that go. To the Enbrel drive through
Enbrel the. Overwhelming sentiment now,
especially now that we get to after Christmas, is everyone's
complaining that any degree of weather whatsoever will make
(42:00):
them fall over. They'll RIP.
You can't keep them in the ground, no matter how many ropes
and stakes and whatever you put on them, they RIP people, try to
repair them, return them. I don't think a lot of these
competitions will come back nextyear.
Oh, really? OK, I'll tell you what I'm doing
on Boxing Day. I'm looking for, I'm looking for
an inflatable Santa. Maybe there's deals of?
(42:21):
Course there will. Be.
They're all about the inflate because.
You didn't like inflatable, I'd,I'd take one, but I know all the
snow that we had, the snow in the blue and all that stuff.
It would knock Santa down. You would never have lasted so.
There's one person in our neighborhood that has it's like
a 12 foot frosty and we all loveit.
And that's just one, one person.So you.
Need to get one rach. But in the snowstorm we had,
yeah, it was knocked over a lot.So you're not getting one, are
(42:43):
you? No I'm not.
I didn't think so. I have deer and a tree lights
and lights lots of. Lights.
Yeah, Going skiing. Yep, yeah.
We buy the skis. No, no, no, we're just, we'll
just rent them and see if we. Like oh, I see, when are you
going? Yeah, I don't know yet.
There's no snow right now. So they're open.
You get a season pass like that,that ladies golf league that you
(43:06):
joined. You guys think you know me so
well, but I. We don't think we do know you.
We do know you're a. Little no.
Better than you know yourself. As it turns out, you don't.
You don't see me very much at all.
So. Enough.
It's not. It's a no.
Turns out that's unnecessary. All right, anyway.
(43:31):
We're moving on now. Show that to Ambro.
And by the way, this is the point we're going to we're going
to read some of your communications with us.
Don't forget the website due to,I'm sorry, underwhelming.ca.
You can get a hold of us, Dave, rachelforeman@gmail.com or
anywhere on social media. If you would like to sponsor the
podcast. We're looking for sponsors.
If you'd like to buy us a coffee, any of those things, but
(43:52):
just go to the website. You can take a, you can sign up
for the newsletter. You can.
There's a oh. Yeah, please sign up for the
newsletter. I put a lot of work into that
each week and I'd like more people to sign up.
Please, there's a poll there too.
You can tell us what you like and don't want in a listener
survey. Yeah, survey there.
Go. Yeah.
Which is nice because it tells us what what you want to hear
and what you don't want to hear so that it's there you go.
(44:14):
You can tell we haven't paid attention to the results yet.
No. Clearly I have.
I've read through them. I have.
Oh, yeah. OK, OK.
So I talked about was last time or the time before watching
Christmas movies making Jeremy turn off sports.
So we watched Hot Frosty and I gave a little Hot Frosty review.
And it was bad. It's not.
Worth it? Yeah, it's not very.
It's so it's so bad that you won't turn it off, though.
(44:36):
You're just like, does this get better?
And then it doesn't really. And then I watched the Chad
Michael Murray one because wherehe's going to be a he's a
stripper for Christmas and so. Just to save the town or the
something's going to close. And if only every man in the
town that happens to have an 8 pack strips, then enough money
goes into the jar and Christmas will be saved and we'll all fall
(44:57):
in love at the same time. That's right.
So that didn't. Even watch it, but that's the
movie. That is, that is exactly what
happens in the movie, and it's very good.
So anyway. Very good.
It is actually very. Good.
Yeah, I. Mean for a Christmas movie it's
you know it's the same it's not like hot frosty was bad but.
You're saying it's very good, but the Asterix is bigger than
(45:20):
the words. Very good, you know.
Yes, well, OK anyway, so we posted a little reel of of me
giving a a review and Crystal says the Chad Michael Murray
movie is so much better, which Iagree with now having watched
it, Foreman said that Ashley wasalready skeptical of which one
the hot frosty. Yeah, yeah.
(45:41):
I was initially suggesting that maybe we should watch it because
of people are talking about it and saying it's actually kind
of. Good, I said to Janet.
And Janet just went, that's the dumbest idea I've ever heard of.
No, we heard your review. So that put an end to that.
And you know me, I watch a lot of stupid shit.
And then actually, a friend of mine said Hot Frosty was filmed
in her husband's hometown of Brockville.
(46:01):
Yes, it's so bad, but I love those cheesy movies.
And I was like, yes. They were having watch parties,
like if you go to a cafe in Brockville, they have the drinks
named after stuff from the movie.
Like they're all. Why not?
I didn't know that. Why not?
So anyways, that's that's the review, but I think the merry
(46:22):
gentleman is the other one. That's what it's called.
That one's. A lot better now.
I can't think of the name of it.A new one on Amazon that has
Michael Bublé in it and Jimmy Fallon and all other bunch of
celebrities in it. Oh, I have to look for that one.
OK. I would do.
That one too sounds better than what the one with the strippers.
Yeah, anything. So I was also talking about
having a mouse in my house recently.
(46:44):
Ainsley sent us a message, she says.
Rachel, I was out shoveling, andguess what came scurrying across
my laneway? I've never swung a shovel so
fast in my life. We live in an old farmhouse, and
this time of year a mousetrap snapping is like an alarm clock
for us. I'm sorry about that.
Yeah. Oh boy.
(47:04):
Somebody else wrote yeah, make sure to seal the mice out of
your house. Don't seal them in.
They will be way more active andwill scramble around your house
and then they'll die in the walland we'll have a horrific smell
you can't get rid of for weeks. Speaking from personal
experience. Yeah, you want them to.
Yeah. Don't seal them in and seal them
out. Seal them out.
(47:25):
I did see that message. And how do I seal them out?
That was from Aaron, by the way.Well, I think you make sure you
get one of the rid of the ones that are in the house and then
seal. But Aaron said by the.
Wall. I don't know.
Well he says, I wish I had a helpful answer but best of luck.
I'm sending sending thoughts andprayers.
Thoughts and prayers for my mostproblem.
(47:45):
Well, we haven't seen another one, so we're all clear so far.
OK, Dave, you were talking abouthaving to buy a bra and a sports
bra for your wife Jada. Yeah.
Have you purchased? I'll let you know how that turns
out. Oh, OK.
I'll wait till next year for that one.
Yeah, well, Daniel had written us to say unless she's giving me
a make, model, sizing and serialnumbers of what she wants, there
(48:07):
ain't no way I'm buying it. That's exactly how I sort of
felt about that too. But we will resolve said story.
Yeah. I'll give her the cash I'm not
attempting to buy. And even Linda commented that
I'm a woman and I can't even stand buying a bra for myself.
That's. Part of the problem, I don't
believe my wife wants to do it either.
(48:28):
No, which is why she's sending me out to do it.
Buying bras and pants are like are no is no fun pants.
Yeah, pants are just no fun either.
Underpants. No.
Just regular pants. Like jeans, mostly.
Pants. Yeah, really.
Well, you got to find like a cert.
Everybody has a brand that they like.
Women probably, I don't know about men, but everybody's got a
(48:49):
brand, certain brand cuz that's the style that fits them and it
fits them well for their body type and what blah blah blah
blah. So.
My brand is what's on sale. Yeah, exactly.
What size is it and is it on sale?
That's my brand. Right.
It's not the option I've learnedin my life.
If you find a bra, pants, or a dress that fits and you like it,
(49:11):
and you especially if you love it, no matter the time of year,
whether you need it or not, you buy it because you will need it
eventually. If you find a bra, pants, or a
dress, just buy it. Yeah.
Well, it's helpful advice as we go out on the note that we all
hope we would go out on this year.
OK, Our final commentary will come in the form of a voice memo
(49:35):
from Scotty Scotty. All right.
Scotty, go. Hi, guys, it's Scotty calling
back. Foreman.
I was very surprised you didn't want a Costco bath bomb.
Like, wouldn't you love just to sit there and watch a Costco
just melt into nothingness? You know, though, I'm melting
'cause you were talking about Wicked too, but I don't think
(49:56):
that actually happens in the movie.
I'm rambling again, Dave. I've had the same issue with my
wife. She's wanted me to buy bras
before she meant to. Something about buying them off
the rack, but I honestly didn't think she'd want second hand
bras so I didn't do that. But.
Then I heard someone suggest that Foreman goes to the the
(50:19):
equine center. I don't think he's going to do
that because Mama didn't raise no foal.
Well, I guess technically she did.
Foreman's brother. Anyway, I can't think of
anything else right now, so I will talk to you guys later.
Bye. That's awesome, Scotty.
Thank you very much. And that's Foreman.
Foreman's mom didn't raise no pole.
(50:39):
Except she did. Foreman's brother.
Merry Christmas. So I think before we dazzle
everyone's ears with Anne Murray, we dazzle well, we
torture everyone with Foreman singing it.
(51:00):
First, there it is. Jeez, Wes, guys, the holly
green, the ivory green, the prettiest picture you've ever
seen is Christmas. And Kalarney, well, all the
folks at home, it's nice, you know, to kiss your bow while
cuddling under the mistletoes and Santa Claus, you know.
(51:22):
Of course, if one of the boys from home, the door is always
open. The neighbor pays a call.
Father John. Before he's gone, we'll bust the
house and all. Hey, how grand it feels to click
your heels and join in the fun of the jigs and rails the likes
you've never known. It's.
Christmas.
Should I go get a Christmas hat?I'll go get one.
If you want. Let me see if they'll throw I.
Might have to. You don't have to.
You don't have to. I only did this because I, you
know, I just thought, well, it'sthe last.
I can hear the hat. Or does it make noise?
No, I'm. Just.
Oh, you're going to hear mine soon.
Oh God. We're all going to have hats.
(00:21):
Merry Christmas. Why do you look at like me like
that? That's funny.
I don't think you get any. Like when for voice overs does
anybody ask you to be Santa? No, nobody asked.
I didn't think. So, oh, here comes my Santa hat.
(00:42):
Don't come in here. close your eyes.
There's gifts in here. Thank you. close your eyes and
walk. Don't look down.
Look up at the ceiling. Now leave.
It's Jeremy. Look.
Don't hit your head, Jeremy. Oh.
(01:06):
I've got a cup of cheer. A cup of cheer?
I don't, but I do have a hat. Look at our festive hats today.
And I have Terry Clark's Jingle Bells still.
Oh, good for. You recently.
Actually, well done. Well, a long.
Time ago that we had her in on Christmas we had to read the
(01:26):
show before Christmas so we likelast day of school or something
and she did Christmas carols with us.
This is due to underwhelming demand.
Felice Dhabi podcast. Felice Dhabi podcast, Yes.
That's us. We are Dave Ray Children
foreman, getting along as usual with our festive hats.
(01:47):
Yeah, say we have the same one, me and Dave.
Yeah, not on YouTube. They sound great do.
They ever. I just want to let you know that
I have so many of these. Christmas hats?
Santa hat, Yeah. Because.
Everyone. We used to do the lighting and
the lights over here with Nick Paparello.
Come on, come on, Nick, Nick, Nick would do.
(02:09):
And every time we would show up,I would have a Santa hat stuffed
in my coat somewhere just in case I needed, you know, to put
the sand. But they would always do.
You remember, Rachel, they always gave us Santa hats and
said, oh, no, no, keep. And I would go, well, here, you
can have it back. Oh, no, keep it.
And, you know, actually, once you put it on, you're not giving
it to anybody else. I mean, you really shouldn't
(02:30):
anyways. If you're a a taxpayer in the
City of London, thank you very much.
This is where your tax dollars go.
I have a few of them floating around my house too.
They got all kinds of them. It was.
Nice. Because they would.
I don't. I have a child's one.
Because they apparently we they could only splurge on two extra
hats and not a third. Ever.
I was never ever on that stage once.
(02:53):
No, ever. You ever?
Met No No. There were so many people on
that stage with us like it was it was just like everybody in
their kid was up there all the I.
Don't know why it's come on a Christmas.
Band really know what was going on.
I wouldn't show up and they had sort of a thing that they were
all doing, but Nick kind of ran the whole show because they did
it on TV and so whatever he saidlike come on out I'm like OK,
(03:15):
don't come out OK, I'll just keep my hat.
By the way, there's hot chocolate and cookies downstairs
so I'm fine leave me alone anyway, I enjoyed it.
I always enjoyed doing the and. I.
Got lots of Christmas hats so thank you very much.
Yeah, sounds great. We have them.
Sorry Forman, it was between this or I have antlers with a
bell today. There you go.
(03:37):
That's not that's a terrible bell foreman's.
Got a little decorative? Foreman's got real.
That's a bell. That's a bell.
OK. All right.
This is a bell too. Are you done?
Is that you done or no? Are you going to keep going?
Well, yes, I'll keep. I'll talk about Christmas and
Christmas songs. So every year, no.
I'm not the sort of segue. I'm just I OK, fine.
(04:00):
Just keep going. Just keep.
The songs every year three of uswould play the Little Drummer
Boy challenge, and if you haven't done this, it's
basically whoever whoever you try and avoid hearing the song
Little Drummer boy I mean, you can't really it's just the.
Goal is to avoid. Hearing it just happens.
To you, some people might play Whammageddon this time of year.
(04:22):
Yes. To avoid last, it's impossible.
To avoid last, it's impossible. Well now everybody has a version
of of Last Christmas now too, asthey do with Little Drummer Boy.
So I was I the 1st to hear Little Drummer Boy or was that
day this year? Was.
Who? Who did you hear?
I don't know what version you heard, but I'd never heard of
(04:44):
whoever did it. I'll look it up as you talk
here. It was something just.
Terrible. And then about.
Look mine up too. No, I know yours because about
two weeks later, maybe a week and a half, Rachel sends a photo
of what were you listening to? Serious.
Your car is serious. In your car?
Yeah, she's she's listening to Little Drummer Boy by Jim
(05:07):
Neighbors. Jim Neighbors, yeah.
You pay money to have serious feed you Jim neighbors.
Yeah, Little Drummer Boy the. Ant at least my torture was for
free from David Bowie and Bing Crosby on at least fresh.
Radio. Yeah, that's, that's a standard
too. Sure.
And the worst version. I don't know why people love
(05:28):
that. I don't know.
But he actually had a couple of versions that you might hate
because after gym neighbors. Please give me gym neighbors
after Bing from. Saving and you're going to have
this discussion, but I am, I'm going to assure you at this
point I have not yet heard the little drum.
I have a voice and really. So you have this.
Is for sure now we are recordingthis before but this this
(05:51):
podcast is released on ChristmasEve and God help me, I hope I'm
still avoiding the Little Drummer void by Christmas Eve.
Well, you've already won. For anybody that doesn't
understand why, if it's your favorite Christmas song, have at
it. Enjoy.
I don't know where that song came from.
I don't know why it exists. I don't really like it.
(06:11):
I never did like it. It just was.
At one point you just sort of accepted, well, it's Christmas
and I have to listen to this, but you don't.
I always used to get, oh, you'rea drummer, so you must love the
Little Drummer Boy Christmas. I don't.
Do you the? Reason.
The reason? I feel the opposite actually.
Yes. I always see those memes and
(06:32):
it's like Mary haven't just given birth to our Lord awakes
to find a small boy with a drummer.
Yeah, no, it didn't happen. He wasn't there.
Heart. The Herald Angels did sing, but
there was no drummer. There was no drummer.
(06:54):
No, there was. No, they were.
Inviting them, they were welcome.
No, right? There was no drummer there.
And when you recorded Christmas song and you are a name
performer like I wonder if BruceSpringsteen has ever regretted
doing Santa Claus's Coming to town live because I feel like
I've that's. The only version that's ever
played. I know, I feel like I heard it.
(07:14):
Did he? Do a recorded version because I.
Would like to do that. He did it the smartest way
possible because you did. You performed it once and they
recorded it and then you didn't have to do the whole studio
treatment. None of that.
It was so smart anyway. Yeah, you know you.
Get paid forever if. Bob Seger, when you were
deciding which Christmas song you would put your stamp on.
(07:39):
Yeah, Bob Seger, who I have a great deal of respect for, you
know, and, and from the Detroit area, for some reason, he did
Little Drummer Boy. What's wrong with the Bob we
used to have? And I know that there's been
some radio stations sold, so we're here in the London area.
And Foreman, your radio station does not do the whole all
(07:59):
Christmas thing. We have, well we're HD Radio and
on our HD Channel 2 is 100%. Christmas music.
All right. Well.
It is. I would say it's very tasteful.
It sticks to the classics. It doesn't get what you want.
Version. And when I say classics, that
doesn't mean Little Drummer Boy.It it's not about 50% Canadian
(08:20):
original an old Christmas music like there is on some other
radio station in London. Yeah.
What's that mean? Is it fresh?
Is it fresh because there used to be the other radio station,
but they've been sold and they're not doing it this year.
Their Christmas music? Little way better.
Yes, way way. Yeah, whoever.
Like there's two. Yeah, whoever was chimed that
(08:40):
together was doing a great job. But on Chime, they're doing a
great job. Is it Chime?
OK, fine. That's right and I'm correct.
That's Rogers Radio. Yes, and I'm sure in Halifax
Move is the one that does 100% Christmas music.
I'm sure it's perfectly acceptable.
I'm telling you, I'm telling youwhat the guys that are doing,
whoever's doing that, you know, they do hit like it's the
(09:01):
weirdest stuff 'cause you will hear like Frank Sinatra doing
Jingle Bell and then you'll hearWhite Christmas by Bing Crosby
and then all of a sudden you'll hear this morning, I think the
Payolas Christmas is coming. You ever heard that one?
It's horrible. I don't know.
It should never be played. It's.
(09:21):
Probably not as bad as Sean Kingston, Little Drummer Boy.
I'm pretty sure it is. Kingston Little drummer boy,
it's it's like. Paola they the reason they're
they're feeding you the Paolas. And who are some of the other
Kim Stockwood? You know who Kim Stockwood is?
Yeah, she has a career every December, thanks to Fred.
Yes, I heard hers the other day.Because they're Canadian.
(09:41):
They need, yeah, they need to play.
You Canadian. True, you don't need to play
that much. Canadian Well, they don't need
to play the payolas doing Christmas is coming ever again.
Guys are so into it, most peoplewould not even notice.
You know I don't need to. Hear it was I've heard the
Little Drummer Boy a million times, and Dave won our
challenge. The end.
That was my point. Yeah, the other point is, what
(10:04):
are you doing listening to Jim Naver's Little Drummer?
Well, I wasn't trying to, OK, really was trying not to, and I
was bummed that I lost this year's challenge.
So that's got to be worse. Unless the Paolas did it.
I don't know, maybe. Rocking around the Christmas
tree at the Christmas party house.
(10:25):
Mistletoe hung where you can seeevery couple tries to stop
rocking around the Christmas tree.
Let the Christmas spirit ring. Later we'll have some pumpkin
pie and we'll do some caroling. You will get a little feeling
(10:48):
when you're here. Voices singing Let's be jolly.
The halls with thousands highly rocking around the Christmas
tree. Have a happy holiday.
Hey everyone dancing there running in the new oh fashion
(11:14):
way. Excellent.
Excellent. Thank you.
Great. You are hired to play kazoo in
my band. Excellent.
Job, I'm about to hear you losers.
(11:37):
This is due to underwhelming demand with Dave, Rachel and
Foreman podcasted around the Christmas tree at the Christmas
party hall. Everybody sing.
Everybody sing. Podcast and.
Around. The Christmas?
Yeah. OK, never mind.
Don't podcast. Please don't see hop.
No. Why?
Let's not that's not Don't forget about our website by the.
(11:58):
Way that sings. No, we're not underwhelming.ca
Go to our website, we need sponsors.
We need sponsors, but there's lots of things to do on on our
website because we've been slowly building it up.
You can leave us a voice messageso we could play it on our show.
You could buy us a coffee. You can check out Dave's blogs.
(12:19):
You can check out our host BIOS.I don't know, I put Oh, and one
of the blogs is behind the scenes photos of our live show
if you haven't looked at that yet.
Behind the scenes so. Yeah, yeah.
You can check out sponsorship info, you can send us a message,
you can, you know, all kinds of stuff out there.
So but I cannot. Yeah, I cannot book myself a
haircut. That's a segue.
(12:42):
We don't offer that service, no.Segue out of nowhere.
Even with my guy I did just get my haircut because someone else
that I live with demanded it happen.
But even my regular guy for several weeks leading up to
Christmas now has been booked like a can't.
You can't get in because everyone wants a haircut for
Christmas. Yes.
(13:02):
Yeah, I don't want a haircut. For you.
I just had one yesterday. I would like I would like to
have hair to cut. Did you notice?
IO No, it did not notice, but itlooks great, did you?
Are wearing a hat. I got my hair done yesterday.
Yeah. Did you?
I'm wearing a hat. Yes, I did.
How much did that cost? Quite a bit.
Quite a bit more than what Foreman would pay.
(13:24):
Without knowing either amount, you are very correct.
You are very correct. And quite a bit more time spent
in the chair too. I.
Yeah, I'm there for about 3 hours, 3 hours, yeah, every
time. But I only go like hours 3-4
times a year so. That's Ashley's excuse, too.
I don't go that often. Yeah, it still doesn't even out.
It does. Not even.
(13:44):
It never evens out. And it is like 3 or 4 hours when
she goes there. It looks beautiful and love it
so much. Work it better, Of course you
better say that, right? Yeah, it looks great, Rach.
Thanks you guys. Never noticed.
You've never noticed. Now you've never noticed before.
We would always notice each others though.
Yes, I would. Always when you, I don't know
why it's so much more obvious when you guys get haircuts, it's
(14:08):
like so much shorter. Because the whole.
Point I feel like when you get ahaircut at one point in my life,
I think, and I know some people who are like this now, men, OK,
that when you go for a haircut, you don't want anybody to
notice. Did you got a haircut?
I'd rather not. Yeah, some.
Some are so regimented that their hair low always looks
(14:28):
exactly the same way they. Want to look exactly the same?
That's the whole purpose of scheduling a haircut.
Maybe every three. Weeks if you want.
Anybody. Yeah, where makes sense now for
me, I'm like, shave it, go ahead, dodge more of it off.
I don't care. Yeah, it's a lot easier to deal
with when you do that. Right, so I shaved Jeremy's
(14:50):
head. I'm his Barber.
Well, that's a lot easier. Yeah, yeah, I have to put myself
in. How is he a good tipper?
No, Nope. He's just like, OK, thanks.
Like, hey, you can put the razoraway, then the Clippers.
That's it. Anyway, so you got a haircut for
me. Oh, he didn't get a haircut.
(15:11):
He can't get a haircut. No, I did.
I did. It's not long.
Wait a minute, problem. Is.
It first needs a haircut, you notice 'cause it's quite nuffy,
yes. It was getting puffy and shaggy,
yeah. I don't know, I don't, I don't
have that issue. Yeah, it's so thick that you
can't. You can fill it with product,
whatever, and at the end of the day, it's just as like a clown
(15:32):
wig no matter what. Yeah.
You know what? I know that you don't like that,
but you are blessed. That's it's.
It's a guess. I'd rather have this problem
than the opposite problem. Yeah, it is a terrible thing to
have a full head of hair, Foreman.
I just, I wish I could give you some Dave.
Yeah. Wow.
All I want for Christmas is Foremans problem.
(15:52):
Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I couldn't get it my the little barbershop I've I've
found in Saint Thomas. Yeah, and the guy I go to and.
What is the what is the guy you go to?
What is he? What's the typical foreman do
cost? It's like 35 bucks plus tax.
How much does your hair cost your haircut, Dave?
(16:12):
It's not that much. Well, my place.
Is nice. He gets it.
He has a little machine and he and he gets at this hot shaving
cream that he puts on your neck and he does the neck thing and
yeah, it's nice. It's a good little process.
Yeah, that's worth the extra. Yeah, it might be worth 30.
Five treats you. That's nice.
And he's like a real Barbie. He, he's either the manager or
the owner of this place, too. He knows what he's doing.
(16:34):
So I found that, you know, go right to the top and he's my
guy. Absolutely.
Get in with them because before Christmas, everyone, and I
misspoke earlier, not everyone wants to get a haircut.
Everyone's being told that they have to get a haircut.
So I was one of those, yeah, couldn't get in.
And you can book online and there's options to join waiting
lists for times and want. So I joined the waiting list for
(16:56):
like a week and a half, never got a call so I just.
You're on the waiting list. For a haircut, I know, but
there's lots of people that workthere and they always say your
walk insurance welcome. And whenever I'm there, people
just walk in off the street and someone's available and we'll
cut their hair, whatever. So I walked in.
And. There's a guy that wasn't busy,
so he started cutting my hair and then my regular guy is there
(17:19):
and I thought, oh, I well, at least I know that he's there.
He can tell this other guy what he does.
Because. The new guy's asking, what do
you want done? I'm like, ask him.
He knows, yeah. Exactly, Yeah.
My regular guy tells him and halfway through my haircut
another person walks in the doorand says oh hey, hi, whatever.
(17:40):
Obviously to see my regular guy,but it's clear that it's for the
time frame after mine. Like I'm there at 9:00, this
guy's there at like 920, obviously ready for a 930 and my
guy hasn't been doing anything the whole time.
And my guy says, well, it's great.
(18:01):
You know, it's great that you came in early.
We could start right now becauseI had a no show.
What, so you could have had yourguy?
I could have had my guy the whole time.
But he didn't. He was probably waiting for the
client. And then you sat down with the
other guy. Maybe, maybe, maybe.
I don't know. Was he annoying?
If you were with the. Different.
(18:22):
No, he was not. What is a foreman?
Because does your guy not want to do your hair foreman?
And does Foreman just switch guys in the same establishment?
Yeah, maybe. I think it was just very a
misunderstanding. Very, very.
No. I don't know.
I I. Don't think there's anything to
that do. You.
Oh, I sure do. No, that's the thing if.
(18:44):
The guy had a no show. Foreman walks in looking for a
haircut like I'm just I walk in out of the blue.
The guy, his regular guy has a no show and gives Foreman to
another guy. No, no, no, no.
Were you? A Barber shop.
Were you already sitting down with the new guy when this other
client walked in to get the new show?
But I. Lost the 930 guy, not the 9:00
(19:05):
guy, Yeah. But if the if your regular guy
was expecting a 9:00 and you walked in at 9:00, well, he's
expecting someone else. He didn't know that they were
going to be a nose. Shop I walked in at like 910.
Oh, like I wasn't there at an exact appointment time because I
did have an appointment. By 910, the 9:00's not showing
exactly. Orman shows there's somebody,
(19:25):
they're both free and Foreman's regular guy doesn't do Foreman.
Foreman, I'd be. AI don't know, maybe he gave 20
minutes before he knew it was a no show.
Switch guys for me. Really.
I think that's a nothing thing, no?
I I keep is. This something or nothing?
It's nothing. I I think.
It's something too. Definitely something.
But what does foreman do? Switch.
(19:47):
Do I switch with the new? Guy I guess like.
Yes, because maybe the old guy now will be offended if you make
an appointment with the new guy.Old guy probably doesn't care if
he's the owner, he's getting paid anyway.
He doesn't care if you book withhim or not.
But then maybe all the more reason why I should I gave the
new guy a bigger tip than normal.
Yes. Because I was mad.
(20:08):
Now that'll do it. Now I I think you better find.
They're going to talk. About I, I think you better find
a new place. I can't go to the place at all
now. Yeah.
Would you like? You can.
I really, I don't think it's a big deal.
Oh, I think it's a huge deal. I can't.
Even want my haircut in the first place.
Yeah. What a tip.
He tipped the other guy more than than his regular.
(20:29):
It's a deal. It's really.
A deal, It's a deal. I simply must go.
Baby, it's cold outside. The answer is no.
But baby, it's cold outside. The welcome has been how lucky
that you drop so nice and warm. Look out the window.
(20:50):
And that's my sister will be stuff because Joshua so
delicious. My brother will be there at the
door. Waves upon a tropical shore.
Me Nan's mind is vicious. Joshua's are delicious
cigarettes. Never such a get home.
Maybe you'll freeze out there. Take lend me your cold up to
(21:14):
your knees out there. You've really been grand when
you touch my hand. Don't you see?
How can you do this thing? You're bound to be taught too
much. Thank you.
My life long, so there'll be plenty.
And fine if she got pneumonia and I can't stay over that old
(21:36):
house. Baby, it's cold.
Baby, it's cold outside. All right, I'll stay for a beer.
You didn't bring your own? No.
This is due to underwhelming demand with a Rachel and
(21:56):
Foreman. Just hear those sleigh bells
jingling ring Ting tingling too.Come on, it's lovely weather for
a podcast together with you, am I right?
Right back at you, David. I'm telling you.
Right now and. Foreman, let me ask you, I don't
know about you, but are you? You know, I've been enjoying
(22:17):
every my nuts roasting by an open fire.
Yeah, yes, That was one of the great things about Christmas on
the radio. You could say things like that
and almost and almost get away with it.
Yes, OK, Someone would always beupset, even though I don't know
how you could be, but someone always would be.
You'd always. Get well.
(22:38):
People were upset about everything.
Because I happen to be Speaking of nuts, I happen to be.
Before I go any further, That's the segue by the way, is.
It OK. Yeah, well, I, my name's on the
Amazon account here in the in the Collins household.
So I get emails. I get all the emails from if
people are ordering, if they're ordering gifts for me, if
(23:00):
they're ordering gifts for anybody, I get the emails
saying, Oh yeah, we got your order, we got this.
Here's something. Do you get those emails from
Amazon? Here's something you might.
I'm the one that gets them. Here's something that you might
like. And last week or two, a week and
a half ago, I got an e-mail and I just went, here's something
I'm so tired of them. Here's something, you know, like
I'm scrolling through my emails,delete, delete, and I see here's
(23:20):
something you might like. Happy nuts.
And I went what, what, what, what?
That sounds like a good idea. Who?
Wouldn't want happiness. Yes, and.
I don't want sad nuts. No, exactly.
No, you don't want unhappy nuts.You you want happy nuts.
So hats off to the happy nuts people who create.
I don't know. I think it's some sort of cream.
(23:42):
I hope. I think I started it because
you're nuts. Who doesn't want happy nuts?
Oh, it actually is for an. I'm happy, Yeah.
Still waiting to hear what happened.
I've seen. It is what it is.
It's something. It's a cream or something.
Yeah, I've seen it on Crees on. And if you didn't buy it and put
it in Jeremy's stocking, what's wrong with you?
Well, I didn't, but I might haveto now that you've mentioned it
'cause I think that. Would be funny.
(24:02):
No one wants sad nuts. Well, yes, and that the truth.
Like everyone, every man should have their.
Everyone with nuts should have this.
If you got nuts, you need them to stay cheery, you want them.
Holly and jolly you want. Them to be jolly, that's.
Right, that's you're nuts, Hollyand Jolly, they're happy nuts.
(24:22):
Well, it's time for headlines. Speaking of.
Well, this is our this is our final podcast of 2024.
Can you? Tell, can you tell I figure we
should wrap up with a few headlines, Am I right?
Yes, I'm right. These are actual, these are
(24:43):
actual headlines, real headlines.
I don't make these up. I don't have to.
No, it's I, I don't have to. I do get contributions.
Again, thank you, Foreman, for contributing a a couple of the
headlines out of there coming up.
OK. I appreciate it.
Oh, somebody sent one that I forgot to pass along to.
You. You should have sent that one to
me. Well, maybe next.
Episode Next. Year I do headlines I'll get.
(25:05):
Next year, yeah. Here we go, New Zealand man wins
Spanish Scrabble championships despite not speaking Spanish.
Real headlines. Wow.
Excellente. Celente.
Unfalis, Navidad. I've had these Navidad.
He's got happy nuts. That's right, You know how many
(25:26):
points you would get for that inScrabble?
At least Navidad, yeah, you get a lot with a zed in there.
Yeah, Zed. Yeah, Czech man fails to win
right to smile on his driver's license photo ID.
Well, it's. Czech man.
Yeah, Czech. Czech Republic.
Yeah. Headlines.
OK, yeah, I thought you meant like a check mark.
I was like, well. Who's the check?
(25:47):
Who's the? Check Mark.
Me ZECHE. Also a high score scrubble.
Sure. Yeah, that's true.
Mosh pit diaper designed to avoid long lines at concert
bathrooms sells out. No.
Of course. That's an actual headline.
Yeah, that's disgusting. I believe it.
(26:07):
Nobody wants to stand in that. Put it in Jeremy's stocking with
his happy nuts. He'll be.
He'll be thrilled. So I.
Probably get sworn out on Christmas morning.
Scientists may have discovered anew form of ancient humans known
as large head people. Think Neanderthals.
(26:28):
Real headlines. But larger, they're large.
By the way, my sister did 23andMe and we found that we or
she, not me, is part Neanderthal.
That has nothing to do with anything.
Yeah, large headed people from does your.
Sister have a large head. No, no, not for no.
(26:49):
No particular. No, we've evolved since then,
Dave. That's.
OK. She doesn't live in Cape Breton.
Columbus Funeral Home to be the first in the state to operate
with a liquor license. That's a good idea.
Headlines. How is that a first?
(27:10):
No one likes to go into funerals, but if there's an open
bar. Yes, absolutely.
In I didn't. Know your uncle, but I'm coming.
It's a celebration of life, exactly.
This is going to happen. That's the best news.
Ever. Absolutely.
They should have liquor and beer.
Right fart coin breaks above the800 million market cap.
(27:33):
What? That's an actual headline.
I'm not making that up. What is this such a thing as
fart coin? Fart coin and.
It's almost yes, it's almost at a billion.
Like should have bought stock. You should have bought fart
coin. It's a joke apparently, but it.
Every time you make a transaction.
Yeah. They send you a digital fart
(27:54):
sound effect. So you sign up for this and you
pay for that. It's fart coin.
It's like Bitcoin, you buy it. Fart coin instead, because it's
fart coin. Bart Coin is going.
It's selling. And then you own the sounds, the
fart sounds, or. Something we're not.
It's explaining blockchain. We're not we're not going to do
cryptocurrency here. OK, Right.
(28:15):
All right, you don't get it. No, I.
Don't. We'll move on.
You'll get this one. It's.
Worth a lot more than hawk to a coin, that's for sure.
That's. That's a coin, yeah.
That's a coin. Might be landing her in jail
coin. Boy Usus City tells residents to
stop sticking googly eyes on itsstatues.
No. Real headlines.
(28:36):
More googly. Eyes.
That's funny. I love that is.
Funny googly. Eyes are.
Always funny, that's. Always funny, that's.
Always funny. Always.
Where is that? Which city does it say?
Somewhere in Oregon, I don't know.
OK, I love. Stop, stop jumping in front of
oncoming cars, South African government warned citizens.
(28:57):
That's that's very morbid. Headlines.
Yes, why? Why are they doing too soon?
Too soon. Doing that, yeah.
Stop doing that. Is it like some sort of
insurance scam? I don't know, I have no idea,
Maybe I didn't. I just felt like such a good
headline, I didn't want to delveany further, no.
As as most of them seem to be. Yes, in that Caterpillar.
(29:18):
That's right. Fair enough.
Woman who heard animal noises from under her house had naked
man living there. He had no clothes and was living
under the house well. That's that's an actual
headline. That's not.
Something anybody wants to find under the house, I wouldn't
think if you're. Living under the house, I mean.
I guess I'm not surprised you don't have clothes.
(29:39):
Yeah, what? I guess you don't.
Well. Now your mouse doesn't seem so
bad now, does it? No.
Yeah, that's such a bad. Fact.
Haven't found another one, thankGod.
Plane grounded for five days after 130 hamsters escaped from
their cages. The last.
On the plane. Yeah, that wouldn't be fun.
No. Real headlines.
(29:59):
Well, it's not as bad as Snakes on a Plane, but.
If you unleash the snakes now, it would get rid of the
hamsters. Anyway.
That's true. Two emus Emus named Thelma and
Louise on the run in South Carolina.
I don't know why. I just like that.
Yeah. Of course.
Yeah. Headlines.
What did they think was going tohappen when they named the emus
(30:22):
Thelma and Louise? I love that.
Yeah, exactly. I followed this one woman on
TikTok and she's got a emu farm.Emu farm or anyway, and or maybe
it's an ostrich. What's the difference?
Well, they're different. Nobody knows.
I don't know anyway, the the bird that she has is named
Karen, and Karen's a real bitch to her and it's so funny to see
(30:44):
her deal with Karen the ostrich or the emu.
So. I'm like, what that stuff?
Side note. Sounds like it.
Thanks continue. Thank you.
Great story. This smuggler caught with 320
tarantulas strapped to his body.EW, gross.
IPhone, Yeah. That's an actual headline.
I have a local headline. Thank you to Foreman.
Courtesy of Foreman. Local headline.
(31:05):
Local headline drug dealer nabbed by police while going
through Wendy's drive through inSimcoe.
Just got to make a bit stop. Real headline.
That's right, it's even worse because he was in the back of a
cab. He was a Dr. thru cab with.
The police fault they were following him with.
(31:26):
The gas, I don't know. Did the cabbie know?
I was. Wouldn't have known.
I have a subsection of headline Christmas headlines because.
It's yeah, that's. Exactly.
Santa Claus helps nab car theft suspect in Jefferson County.
Headline. Wow, way to go Santa.
Yeah, he knows if you've been naughty or nice.
(31:47):
You know what? I'm saying yeah, he sure does.
Yeah, Reverend's Santa sermon ruins Christmas for sobbing
school pupils. That's not very nice.
What woolly? That's an actual headline.
Should have asked them to come and speak at the Christmas.
Good grief, that's worse than our last podcast.
(32:09):
Man gets stuck in chimney while fleeing from police.
I think that could be a Christmas headline.
I'm just saying. Yes.
Real headlines, yeah. Doesn't say Christmas, but.
You're probably, you know, I have a feeling.
You know who? Else spins down the chimney.
Well, exactly, I could do it. Buckingham Palace maid arrested
after drunken brawl at work Christmas party.
(32:30):
That's a great headline. That's one of my favorite
headlines. Headlines.
Yeah, there's a lot there to unpack.
I think we all want. To know what happens?
Well, I guess we do know what happens at the Buckingham Palace
Christmas party. Another.
Local Christmas headline courtesy Forum.
Thank you. Forum and Local 1 here.
Here we go. Saint Thomas woman punches Santa
(32:52):
Claus for blocking her parade view.
Yeah, that's right. That's an actual headline.
At the Saint Thomas parade. Yes, it was 25% more Grinches.
Yes. I'm here to see the Santa Claus
parade. Get out of my way.
Santa. Not only what's that local news,
(33:13):
but it also ended up on TMZ. It was on TMZ.
Of course. This is so ridiculous.
Yes, yeah. All right, we have time for a
couple of Florida's. Here we go off the floor.
Hey, plants, but no pants. Florida Maine gardens in the
nude. Real headline.
Yeah, well. Of course, of course, he's just
hotter than stink down right? Florida Man, by the way, gets
(33:34):
naked in Uber after getting a feeling.
A feeling. Yeah, I just had this feeling.
To get naked. Yeah, headlines.
What was the feeling of the driver?
Unhappy. That's another headline.
Unhappy nuts. Yeah, sad.
Nuts. Sad nuts.
Florida man accused of threatening person with Molotov
(33:58):
cocktail and a sword to make a point.
Point me. Yeah.
That's an actual headline. You're not exactly the one you
thought you were making, but. Made one.
We all know you're crazy now. Yes, Florida man wearing blue
bonnet and flowery dress allegedly steals 28 cans of baby
(34:20):
formula from Publix. Real.
Headlines I don't. Think I need to focus on what
this man's wearing. It sounds nice.
Probably match well the. Bonnet.
Really. You want to wear a dress?
Fine. It's the bonnet that really had
me. But then he stole the baby
formula so that that makes sense.
Did he think that babies get theformula for free?
(34:42):
They go shopping for themselves.I do not know, Florida Man
Florida man who lied about identity, arrested after
forgetting who he said he was. Headlines, naturally.
It's a really good one. You just have to sit.
And make sure you know the story.
Yeah, you may want to listen to that one again.
I'm not doing it twice, but that's there's a lot to unpack,
(35:04):
right? Half naked Florida man high on
meth breaks into home, steals carpet cleaner that checks I
think. It's an actual headline.
Finally, Matt. That's just if they had had a
crocodile, he would have stolen that too.
I'm pretty sure. Probably.
Yes, yeah, again, mess smoking Florida Man attacks mattress in
(35:24):
jealous rage. Attacks the mattress.
Just. He's jealous of the mattress.
What goes on between a man and his mattresses?
Between the man and his mattresses.
That's. Right.
Yeah, Well, OK. Maybe not a Matt case.
Yeah, right. One more.
Here we go. Last one Florida Man plastic
surgeon known as doctor downtown.
(35:47):
Speaking of happy nuts. Florida.
Man. Plastic surgeon known as doctor
downtown loses license over tragic Brazilian butt lift
death. Oh death, My goodness.
Headlines and. That's how we're ending the
year. That's exactly.
Tragic Brazilian butt lift by doctor downtown.
(36:29):
Wow, you guys are? Amazing.
We do it all, Dave. We do it all.
(36:51):
Christmas. Merry Christmas.
Oh, the mic dropping. Yeah, 3 mic.
Drop. That was a big finish.
Actually, I was. I was proud of us if.
You're gonna go out, That's how you go up.
(37:45):
The this is due to underwhelmingdemand.
It's Dave, Rachel and Foreman. This is the podcast in a Pear
tree, just in time for Christmas.
Yes, I like that one podcast. In a pear tree, by the way, I
middle of the day we happened tofind ourselves very close to
embro. And I said to my wife, we need
(38:05):
to drive through embro. I need to drive through embro.
I forgot they have, they've got the Santa Clauses.
Yeah, Genesis to do. I said they sure do.
Well, then we have to go. It was delightful.
It it was worth all of the hype,these Santa Clauses.
And you got them where you got them?
Home Hardware, Right. They were Home Hardware, which
(38:27):
you didn't like Rachel, But I'm telling you right now, if they
if they weren't all the same Santas, it just wouldn't work.
So like, they are all the exact same Santas and they're
everywhere. They're over 200.
Yeah, I only went down the Main Street and you, they're
everywhere is awesome. And I'm there in the daytime.
(38:48):
I'm sure at night when they're all lit up they look great.
Yeah. Oh, they do.
They ever. I think it it's a great idea,
it's a great community thing to do.
I just don't, I don't love that it's it was brought about by the
retail store. They raised like $9000.
It worked. Absolutely.
They raised all that money. I was talking to the women who
(39:10):
were spearheading the Mount Elgin gingerbread men.
Yeah. How'd that go?
Yeah. Situation.
Right. Well, both those towns and the
inflatable snowmen in Folden as well.
Folden. Folden, Zoya, all, and there was
quite a few. I guess for for an intersection.
They've done pretty well with the drive for sure.
(39:31):
Even the Township of Southwest Oxford had a Christmas lights
competition. And you know how when I first
mentioned the gingerbread men situation and the woman who
alerted me to what they were doing on Heart FM was the woman
who also didn't want to partake?Yeah, I'm a snowman lover.
(39:51):
I would have totally been all inon a snowman.
Her house won the Christmas lights prize from the Township,
which included several gingerbread men.
Wow, good. For her.
Yeah, and the women who organized the whole thing are a
little bit miffed. So she didn't want to partake in
(40:12):
the gingerbread. Thing she didn't.
She's alerted me to the fact that the town was trying to do
everyone get an inflatable gingerbread man just because she
doesn't like inflatables. Did not want to participate.
Turns out she won the Township Christmas light contest for her.
Yes, Anita, who called in originally the one that doesn't
(40:33):
want the gingerbread. You have got to be kidding.
No, it's her and her display is a Wiener dog eating free light
up gingerbread like a little one.
We did. We won for most original.
So there's 3 zip tied together and there's one in the mouth of
(40:55):
a dash hound, a light up dash hound, Christmas lawn ornaments.
So we won on that. So Miss I Don't Like Gingerbread
Men won an award for having three of them. 443 running away,
3 running away from the from thedash hound and one in the dash
(41:16):
hound's mouth getting eat. Do you even have a single
snowman in your display? I absolutely do.
He had the snowman is standing there with the leash around the
dash hound. OK, so the snowman's walking the
dog. Who's eating the gingerbread
man, Correct. I mean, I like it.
It does still conflict with yourprevious comments though.
(41:37):
Hey, we compromise. We got these miniature
gingerbread masks, you know, so we are still in the spirit and
supporting the community. Yeah, I love those are I like
that go. To the Enbrel drive through
Enbrel the. Overwhelming sentiment now,
especially now that we get to after Christmas, is everyone's
complaining that any degree of weather whatsoever will make
(42:00):
them fall over. They'll RIP.
You can't keep them in the ground, no matter how many ropes
and stakes and whatever you put on them, they RIP people, try to
repair them, return them. I don't think a lot of these
competitions will come back nextyear.
Oh, really? OK, I'll tell you what I'm doing
on Boxing Day. I'm looking for, I'm looking for
an inflatable Santa. Maybe there's deals of?
(42:21):
Course there will. Be.
They're all about the inflate because.
You didn't like inflatable, I'd,I'd take one, but I know all the
snow that we had, the snow in the blue and all that stuff.
It would knock Santa down. You would never have lasted so.
There's one person in our neighborhood that has it's like
a 12 foot frosty and we all loveit.
And that's just one, one person.So you.
Need to get one rach. But in the snowstorm we had,
yeah, it was knocked over a lot.So you're not getting one, are
(42:43):
you? No I'm not.
I didn't think so. I have deer and a tree lights
and lights lots of. Lights.
Yeah, Going skiing. Yep, yeah.
We buy the skis. No, no, no, we're just, we'll
just rent them and see if we. Like oh, I see, when are you
going? Yeah, I don't know yet.
There's no snow right now. So they're open.
You get a season pass like that,that ladies golf league that you
(43:06):
joined. You guys think you know me so
well, but I. We don't think we do know you.
We do know you're a. Little no.
Better than you know yourself. As it turns out, you don't.
You don't see me very much at all.
So. Enough.
It's not. It's a no.
Turns out that's unnecessary. All right, anyway.
(43:31):
We're moving on now. Show that to Ambro.
And by the way, this is the point we're going to we're going
to read some of your communications with us.
Don't forget the website due to,I'm sorry, underwhelming.ca.
You can get a hold of us, Dave, rachelforeman@gmail.com or
anywhere on social media. If you would like to sponsor the
podcast. We're looking for sponsors.
If you'd like to buy us a coffee, any of those things, but
(43:52):
just go to the website. You can take a, you can sign up
for the newsletter. You can.
There's a oh. Yeah, please sign up for the
newsletter. I put a lot of work into that
each week and I'd like more people to sign up.
Please, there's a poll there too.
You can tell us what you like and don't want in a listener
survey. Yeah, survey there.
Go. Yeah.
Which is nice because it tells us what what you want to hear
and what you don't want to hear so that it's there you go.
(44:14):
You can tell we haven't paid attention to the results yet.
No. Clearly I have.
I've read through them. I have.
Oh, yeah. OK, OK.
So I talked about was last time or the time before watching
Christmas movies making Jeremy turn off sports.
So we watched Hot Frosty and I gave a little Hot Frosty review.
And it was bad. It's not.
Worth it? Yeah, it's not very.
It's so it's so bad that you won't turn it off, though.
(44:36):
You're just like, does this get better?
And then it doesn't really. And then I watched the Chad
Michael Murray one because wherehe's going to be a he's a
stripper for Christmas and so. Just to save the town or the
something's going to close. And if only every man in the
town that happens to have an 8 pack strips, then enough money
goes into the jar and Christmas will be saved and we'll all fall
(44:57):
in love at the same time. That's right.
So that didn't. Even watch it, but that's the
movie. That is, that is exactly what
happens in the movie, and it's very good.
So anyway. Very good.
It is actually very. Good.
Yeah, I. Mean for a Christmas movie it's
you know it's the same it's not like hot frosty was bad but.
You're saying it's very good, but the Asterix is bigger than
(45:20):
the words. Very good, you know.
Yes, well, OK anyway, so we posted a little reel of of me
giving a a review and Crystal says the Chad Michael Murray
movie is so much better, which Iagree with now having watched
it, Foreman said that Ashley wasalready skeptical of which one
the hot frosty. Yeah, yeah.
(45:41):
I was initially suggesting that maybe we should watch it because
of people are talking about it and saying it's actually kind
of. Good, I said to Janet.
And Janet just went, that's the dumbest idea I've ever heard of.
No, we heard your review. So that put an end to that.
And you know me, I watch a lot of stupid shit.
And then actually, a friend of mine said Hot Frosty was filmed
in her husband's hometown of Brockville.
(46:01):
Yes, it's so bad, but I love those cheesy movies.
And I was like, yes. They were having watch parties,
like if you go to a cafe in Brockville, they have the drinks
named after stuff from the movie.
Like they're all. Why not?
I didn't know that. Why not?
So anyways, that's that's the review, but I think the merry
(46:22):
gentleman is the other one. That's what it's called.
That one's. A lot better now.
I can't think of the name of it.A new one on Amazon that has
Michael Bublé in it and Jimmy Fallon and all other bunch of
celebrities in it. Oh, I have to look for that one.
OK. I would do.
That one too sounds better than what the one with the strippers.
Yeah, anything. So I was also talking about
having a mouse in my house recently.
(46:44):
Ainsley sent us a message, she says.
Rachel, I was out shoveling, andguess what came scurrying across
my laneway? I've never swung a shovel so
fast in my life. We live in an old farmhouse, and
this time of year a mousetrap snapping is like an alarm clock
for us. I'm sorry about that.
Yeah. Oh boy.
(47:04):
Somebody else wrote yeah, make sure to seal the mice out of
your house. Don't seal them in.
They will be way more active andwill scramble around your house
and then they'll die in the walland we'll have a horrific smell
you can't get rid of for weeks. Speaking from personal
experience. Yeah, you want them to.
Yeah. Don't seal them in and seal them
out. Seal them out.
(47:25):
I did see that message. And how do I seal them out?
That was from Aaron, by the way.Well, I think you make sure you
get one of the rid of the ones that are in the house and then
seal. But Aaron said by the.
Wall. I don't know.
Well he says, I wish I had a helpful answer but best of luck.
I'm sending sending thoughts andprayers.
Thoughts and prayers for my mostproblem.
(47:45):
Well, we haven't seen another one, so we're all clear so far.
OK, Dave, you were talking abouthaving to buy a bra and a sports
bra for your wife Jada. Yeah.
Have you purchased? I'll let you know how that turns
out. Oh, OK.
I'll wait till next year for that one.
Yeah, well, Daniel had written us to say unless she's giving me
a make, model, sizing and serialnumbers of what she wants, there
(48:07):
ain't no way I'm buying it. That's exactly how I sort of
felt about that too. But we will resolve said story.
Yeah. I'll give her the cash I'm not
attempting to buy. And even Linda commented that
I'm a woman and I can't even stand buying a bra for myself.
That's. Part of the problem, I don't
believe my wife wants to do it either.
(48:28):
No, which is why she's sending me out to do it.
Buying bras and pants are like are no is no fun pants.
Yeah, pants are just no fun either.
Underpants. No.
Just regular pants. Like jeans, mostly.
Pants. Yeah, really.
Well, you got to find like a cert.
Everybody has a brand that they like.
Women probably, I don't know about men, but everybody's got a
(48:49):
brand, certain brand cuz that's the style that fits them and it
fits them well for their body type and what blah blah blah
blah. So.
My brand is what's on sale. Yeah, exactly.
What size is it and is it on sale?
That's my brand. Right.
It's not the option I've learnedin my life.
If you find a bra, pants, or a dress that fits and you like it,
(49:11):
and you especially if you love it, no matter the time of year,
whether you need it or not, you buy it because you will need it
eventually. If you find a bra, pants, or a
dress, just buy it. Yeah.
Well, it's helpful advice as we go out on the note that we all
hope we would go out on this year.
OK, Our final commentary will come in the form of a voice memo
(49:35):
from Scotty Scotty. All right.
Scotty, go. Hi, guys, it's Scotty calling
back. Foreman.
I was very surprised you didn't want a Costco bath bomb.
Like, wouldn't you love just to sit there and watch a Costco
just melt into nothingness? You know, though, I'm melting
'cause you were talking about Wicked too, but I don't think
(49:56):
that actually happens in the movie.
I'm rambling again, Dave. I've had the same issue with my
wife. She's wanted me to buy bras
before she meant to. Something about buying them off
the rack, but I honestly didn't think she'd want second hand
bras so I didn't do that. But.
Then I heard someone suggest that Foreman goes to the the
(50:19):
equine center. I don't think he's going to do
that because Mama didn't raise no foal.
Well, I guess technically she did.
Foreman's brother. Anyway, I can't think of
anything else right now, so I will talk to you guys later.
Bye. That's awesome, Scotty.
Thank you very much. And that's Foreman.
Foreman's mom didn't raise no pole.
(50:39):
Except she did. Foreman's brother.
Merry Christmas. So I think before we dazzle
everyone's ears with Anne Murray, we dazzle well, we
torture everyone with Foreman singing it.
(51:00):
First, there it is. Jeez, Wes, guys, the holly
green, the ivory green, the prettiest picture you've ever
seen is Christmas. And Kalarney, well, all the
folks at home, it's nice, you know, to kiss your bow while
cuddling under the mistletoes and Santa Claus, you know.
(51:22):
Of course, if one of the boys from home, the door is always
open. The neighbor pays a call.
Father John. Before he's gone, we'll bust the
house and all. Hey, how grand it feels to click
your heels and join in the fun of the jigs and rails the likes
you've never known. It's.
Christmas.
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