April 22, 2025 • 25 mins
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Stuck with that feeling of being "behind" in your business? It's one of the most common struggles among entrepreneurs, especially women. We look at others who started after us yet seem miles ahead, and wonder where we went wrong.
But what if that feeling is actually giving us the wrong message? What if you're not behind at all, but exactly where you need to be, gathering the precise experiences required for your unique breakthrough?
In this deeply personal episode, I share my own journey through the challenges that initially made me feel like a failure but ultimately prepared me for success. From my "dead course graveyard" of investments that didn't pay off to hiring decisions I regretted, from launches that completely flopped to offers I hated delivering—each apparent setback contained a lesson I couldn't have learned any other way.
These challenges taught me exactly what learning formats work best for me, what qualities I need in team members, how to structure my offerings in alignment with my strengths, and how to balance business growth with family priorities. The seemingly wasted time and money weren't wasted at all—they were investments in my growth that prepared me for my next level.
The most beautiful part? When we reframe our challenges this way, we transform them into wisdom we can share with others, creating a ripple effect that extends far beyond our individual journeys. Your "failures" aren't just teaching you—they're potentially teaching everyone you touch.
Next time you feel that painful twinge of being "behind," pause and ask: "What is this trying to teach me?" Lean into the lesson with curiosity rather than judgment. You're exactly where you need to be, and your breakthrough is waiting on the other side of these challenges.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, this is Annie Veblen-McCarty and I'm gonna
teach you how to be effortlesslyproductive.
I've been an entrepreneur forover 20 years and I got sick and
tired of experts preaching whatbusiness and life should look
like and what I should be doingas a leader and to turn a profit
, only to find myself wastingtime, burned out, feeling
(00:22):
inauthentic and still not makingany money.
On this show, we are ditchingthe shoulds.
I'm giving you permission to dobusiness differently.
As a certified master coach, Ibelieve that everything you need
to have success and build thelife and business of your dreams
is already living on the inside.
(00:43):
I'm going to empower you tolean into what you do best, help
you see your path forwardclearly and give you the
strategy and action steps alongthe way to become effortlessly
productive.
Let's dive in.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Welcome to today's episode of Effortlessly
Productive.
This episode is deeply, deeplyimportant and meaningful to me
and deeply personal as well.
I'm going to share a little bitof my story with you and how
this has played out for me.
So we're going to be talkingabout that belief of feeling
(01:21):
behind.
I coach so many women,especially women in business,
who feel like they are behind.
They see somebody who startedway after them and is
skyrocketed in their success.
They see the years of work thatthey have put in and they look
at all that effort and all thattime and all that energy and
(01:43):
they feel like I should be amillionaire right now.
And they look at all thateffort and all that time and all
that energy and they feel likeI should be a millionaire right
now and they aren't.
There are so many reasons why wemight feel behind in business
and I think that's a normal partof the process.
That can be a normal part ofjust general life too.
Right, I know I had kids a lotlater than other people my age
(02:06):
and there were times where I'mlike, oh, I just feel behind,
like they have all these babiesand I'm not there yet and like I
know that we will have a family, but it just was not the season
for us.
We wanted to wait until alittle bit later, and that was
okay, but there is that pull ofseeing other people have these
things and feeling like we'rebehind, right.
(02:29):
So that's what we're going tobe talking about today and just
having a little bit of aperspective shift on this, and I
want to share again some of myvery personal stories with you
to help you see how you are notbehind.
You are not behind, my friend.
You are being prepared for yournext level.
(02:54):
Anywhere in your life, andespecially in your business,
where you feel like you arebehind, there is a lesson in
there.
Right, there is a reason, thereis a purpose for this growth.
We are going to our next level,and that is okay.
That our path, our growthjourney, does not look the same
(03:16):
as everybody else.
What if every single lessonthat you learn, every single
challenge that you face inbusiness and in life, every
single investment that doesn'tpay off for you, what if every
single one of these things wasactually preparing you for your
biggest breakthrough?
Right, oftentimes we forgetthat there is that next level
(03:40):
waiting for us, that nextversion of ourselves, that huge
breakthrough that we are aboutto have and when we start to
feel behind, we tend to back offand we tend to maybe not learn
those lessons, not face thosechallenges, not invest again,
and that only pushes thatbreakthrough further and further
(04:02):
and further out.
So I'm going to share somelessons that I have learned,
some challenges that I've faced,definitely some investments
that I've made that didn't payoff, and I want you, when these
moments come up, to remember tolean in, to be excited.
Right, we can be excited aboutthe challenges that life throws
(04:23):
our way and business throws ourway, because we know we can
trust that our next level iswaiting right behind that
challenge or that lesson.
So there have been so manycourses that I have invested in
that it sounded great in themoment I'm sure you have those
too.
I literally have my like deadcourse graveyard where it's
(04:46):
stuff that in that moment I waslike this is for me, this is
what I need right now, and I'vehad sometimes, where I invest in
something and my season of lifeor of business shifts like that
, it shifts instantly and Ididn't know that shift was
coming and all of a sudden thatcourse that I had invested in it
(05:07):
was not for the season that Iwas entering, and that's okay,
right.
I know I have bought coursesand gone through them and I was
like, well, that was a waste oftime and money.
Maybe it wasn't what I expected, maybe it didn't go in depth
enough, maybe it was too indepth, maybe it was too long,
maybe it was too short.
(05:27):
There's so many differentcourses that I've paid for and,
for whatever reason, it justdidn't pay off.
It wasn't what I needed in themoment.
But what came out of that is Inow know better what kind of
courses work well for me.
What kind of courses work wellfor me.
I have found, honestly,certifications are something
that skyrocket me into the nextlevel of growth.
(05:51):
I lean so much further in whenI am getting certified in
something and it's not thatevery single thing I do has to
be a certification.
But I know if my heart istelling me and my intuition is
telling me this certification isright for me.
I know a lot of the time thatis going to be that huge
breakthrough.
It's about learning what workswell for us.
(06:13):
Sometimes we have a teacher orsomebody we're learning from
where maybe it's not the bestfit.
So I've learned.
Let's do maybe something freewith them.
Maybe let's do a little bitsmaller of an offer or a
container with them instead ofdoing something huge, because
then I can see if we are areally good fit.
(06:33):
Even sometimes in a masterclassyou don't get a really good fit
.
Even sometimes in a masterclassyou don't get a really good
picture of somebody.
So maybe make a little bitsmaller investment, or maybe
it's you're leaning more intoyour intuition.
I know I have invested in somethings where, if I had really
listened to my intuition, it wastelling me, no, like this is
not the right thing.
But I got caught up in theexcitement.
(06:55):
I got caught up because afriend of mine was doing it and
I wanted to do it too and itsounded so fun and exciting and
I didn't really think about am Iin the season where this is
going to be the best fit for me?
This is the right.
Next thing that I need to learn, not my friend that I need to
learn, and that's okay, becauseI've learned lessons and learned
(07:18):
things to tune into right.
I figured out more questions toask myself before I pushed that
buy button, and I also have hadtimes recently where I've made
a super huge, really scaryinvestment, but my intuition, my
gut and my heart was telling mego for it.
(07:38):
This is for you and because Ihave learned to listen to that
more, that has paid off.
So buying a course or investingin something like that it's not
actually a mistake.
It was helping you learn.
What is your way of learning?
What is the best instructor orcoach or trainer for you?
(07:59):
What is the best format forcourses?
I know for me, having a coursewhere I tune in live is way
better than doing a course whereI just watch videos, but there
are some topics actually thatwatching on video is better than
doing it live.
So it's just about learning.
Every single one of those was alesson that I learned, and now
(08:22):
I know, when I make aninvestment in a course or a
certification, nine times out of10, or maybe even more than
that, 99 times out of 100, it iswhat is going to be good for me
, because I have learned so manylessons along the way.
When it comes to hiring people,too, this is something I get
asked so much.
I have a lot of experience withhiring people.
(08:45):
At this point, my husband'sbusiness has been around when I
am recording this for over 21years.
We have had many employees.
Over those 21 years I also, inmy businesses, have worked with
a lot of different VAs andfreelancers and subcontractors,
and not every single one ofthose works out great.
(09:08):
Sometimes we hire people becausewe literally couldn't find
anybody else to do the job.
At the moment.
The job market has a huge, hugebearing on that right, and so
sometimes we hire somebodybecause we're like I've been
looking and I really just needsomebody to do this, and maybe
it's not the exact rightsomebody, but it's who you have
(09:29):
at the moment.
That's just a lesson that wecan learn, right, that sometimes
we need to wait around for thatright person, or maybe in that
moment it was the best decisionfor us, but later on we want to
make a different decision.
It doesn't mean it was amistake.
Sometimes you are going to hirepeople who seem like they're
(09:49):
going to be a perfect fit foryou and it just isn't, for
whatever reason.
Maybe it's a personalitymismatch, maybe it's the way you
work together.
It just doesn't mesh quiteright.
You don't jive, they're notpicking up what you're putting
down, right, and that's okay.
Maybe it's that they were tooexpensive or maybe they didn't
(10:10):
have the skill set.
But now I know from making somany hiring decisions that maybe
ended up not being the rightdecision.
It's not that it was a mistake.
It's not that I wish that I haddone something differently.
Now I know who to hire better.
I know what questions to askwhen I am hiring.
(10:31):
I know who I want to work with.
I know what kind of person Iwant to work with.
I prefer to work with peoplewho are very self-motivated and
self-driven.
They don't need a lot offeedback and input from me.
And I've hired people who needa lot of input from me, and it's
not that they were a bad VA,it's not that they did a bad job
(10:55):
.
It's just that we had thatmismatch.
So I tend to do better withpeople that I can just be like
here's an idea, I have run withit and do it and I'll look at it
on the back end and we can makesome tweaks from there.
If somebody needs aninstruction every step of the
way, there are otherentrepreneurs out there, other
business owners, who want to begiving those step-by-step
(11:19):
instructions, and so they'regoing to be the perfect VA for
them.
They just weren't for me.
So again, now I know whatquestions to ask.
I know who I'm looking for.
Those were such importantlessons for me to learn.
Imagine if I hadn't learnedthose.
I would still be back where Iwas 21 years ago, hiring people
(11:41):
that weren't the best employeeor VA or contractor for me.
So those are all superimportant lessons.
I've had launches that totallyflopped.
I have held masterclasses thatI promoted for weeks and weeks
and weeks that had only fivepeople register and nobody show
up on the masterclass and ratherthan looking at that like, oh
(12:04):
my gosh, I suck and what I dosucks, I must be a terrible
coach.
I must be a terrible mentor.
I must be a terrible mentor.
I must be a terrible trainer.
No, maybe the subject that Iwas doing the masterclass on
wasn't what my people werelooking for.
Maybe my messaging was just offand it didn't hit with them.
(12:26):
Maybe I didn't promote it tothe best of my ability.
Maybe I didn't promote it onthe right platforms where my
people were.
Maybe I forgot to set upreminders that the call was
coming.
There's so many differentlessons that I've learned along
the way by launches actuallycompletely flopping.
(12:47):
I learned so much more whenthings flop than when things
skyrocket.
Imagine the first thing thatyou put out there.
Let's say you had 50 peoplesign up for it.
You might not have learnedlessons from that, right, but
when we do things that don'twork, we actually learn more
lessons from it, and that way wecan make so many more changes
(13:09):
and do things so muchdifferently the next time.
It gives us so much more datathan when things work and we
don't know why it worked.
It makes it really hard toduplicate and replicate the next
time we want to launchsomething.
So those are all just lessons.
I have sold offers that I endedup heating, heating, delivering
(13:33):
on the back end, and there isalmost nothing worse right?
It's a terrible feeling whenyou sell something and then
you're like, oh my gosh, Iseriously dislike showing up for
this call every single week.
Or this was an ongoingcontainer and now I don't want
to continue it, and I have totell everybody in this container
(13:55):
that it's not going to beongoing, that I am going to end
it.
I've done that before and itwas really hard.
That was a huge, huge challengeto show up to a mastermind and
tell people that my businessdirection had shifted or that my
heart wasn't in that anymoreand that I wanted to go a
(14:15):
different direction.
But I did it and that was achallenge that I learned from.
Some people love offering thingsthat are ongoing forever and
ever and ever.
For me.
I tend to like to do shorterthings and again, that was just
something I had to learn byoffering that and realizing I
didn't like that container, Ididn't like that container, I
(14:36):
didn't like teaching in thatcontainer.
But that's okay, because I willnever make the mistake of
offering that again.
Again, it wasn't even a mistake.
It was a huge lesson that Ilearned.
So there are things that I havesold that I ended up not liking
delivering on on the back end,and you know what.
That was just that learningmoment of I don't have to do
(15:00):
this in my business.
This way, I am my own businessowner.
I get to decide what I offer.
Just because that works forsomebody else does not mean that
works for me.
Just because somebody elseloves building this for people
doesn't mean that I also lovebuilding it.
There are so many differentlessons to take out of that.
Then we also have a lot ofchallenges.
(15:22):
There are so many challengesthat I have faced.
I have had times in my life andin my business where I have just
packed my schedule way too busyto the point where I had no
room for creativity, where I hadno room to actually go and work
on my business because I was sostuck in working with my
(15:43):
clients and I love working withmy clients but when I don't even
have the ability to bring onnew clients because my entire
schedule is consumed withserving the clients I already
have, we start and stop right.
Our momentum in our businessstart and stop that was
something that I have had toexperience is I have so much of
(16:04):
my time going to my client workand delivering what I've
promised to clients that I don'tactually have time to work on
my own business to find moreclients.
And when those contracts end,when those containers end, then
the business is stopped becauseI have not continued to build
the momentum and I did notcontinue doing what was working
(16:25):
for me because I literallydidn't have the time or energy.
So packing my schedule too fullor packing it full of other
kinds of appointments that werenot paying clients that is a
pitfall that I have fallen intoand I have learned a huge lesson
, thank goodness, from thosechallenges, because now I know
(16:46):
what my optimum schedule is ofmaking sure I'm capping the
number of calls and appointments.
I'll take every single week ofbuilding containers where I can
serve more people at the sametime instead of a limited number
of clients.
There's so many solutions thatI have come up with to that, but
(17:06):
I wouldn't have come up withthose if I didn't have those
challenges in the first place.
I also have had seasons wherethe kids were home.
Covid was a huge learninglesson for me in business with
that of all of a sudden, inblink of an eye, everything
changed and I suddenly had threekids at home with me, 24, seven
(17:27):
, and the time and energy that Ihad for my business looked very
different than it had even theweek before and I had to make
some shifts and that was a hugechallenge.
But you know what I learned?
To be adaptable.
I learned to be flexible, Ileaned in to what was the most
important thing to me at thattime, in that season of my life.
(17:49):
And we are all going to haveseasons that we walk through
where the unexpected happens,our life changes in the blink of
an eye and our priorities and,what's most important, shifts,
and that's okay, but goingthrough that challenge helped me
understand how to cope withthat.
So the next time that happensin my life, that will not be an
(18:11):
isolated case, I guarantee.
The next time that happens, thenext time I have a challenge
like that.
I've been through it, so now Iknow how to better shift my
business and shift my focus andmy attention to make sure that I
am staying aligned with mypriorities and what's important
to me.
I've also had times where I justliterally stretched myself too
(18:34):
thin like not even with clients,with volunteering for certain
things for field trips, forexample, for my kids or for
serving on the board of theirlacrosse club and I've had to
realize that that didn't alignwith my business goals and it
didn't align with my personalgoals and it wasn't how I wanted
(18:56):
to be spending my time.
So I've gotten very, very clearon what I do and do not want to
put my time and energy into,and so I have now been able to
set up expectations with my kidsof I will go on one field trip
a year with each one of you, sothat's three field trips a year
and I will do your field day atthe end of the year, but I'm not
(19:19):
going to all the million otherschool things in between.
I'm not going to sign up tochaperone every single field
trip that your class takes, andthat is okay.
And I actually sat down and hada conversation with my kids
about this and asked them what'sthe most important thing to you
that I come to?
I can come to your educationweek where parents can come into
(19:43):
the classroom.
I can come into class parties.
I can come in to read to yourclass.
I can do field day.
I can do field trips, but weneed to pick like one or two
things.
I'm not going to come to everysingle thing because I literally
would spend my entire time withthree kids and the ages they
(20:03):
are.
It would literally be everysingle week would be chunked up
with things going on with theirclass and that just doesn't
align with my business goals ormy personal goals, and that's
okay.
And it makes those times that Ido get to chaperone their field
trip or help with their fieldday even more special and even
(20:23):
more meaningful.
So I get to lean all the wayinto those and they get to lean
all the way into those, insteadof me showing up scattered and
chaotic and just running allover the place and distracted,
because I know that there arethings in my business that I'm
missing.
Doing that I really want to bedoing Having that conversation
(20:45):
with my kids about why I do whatI do, why it's so important to
me and why I want to make thisimpact.
They understand better.
And now you know those timeswhere the kids will fill out
like the Mother's Day cards orwhatever write a sweet little
note that their teachers arelike let's write somebody a
letter, like they talk about thepeople that I help and why
(21:08):
that's so important, how I'mmaking a difference in the world
.
They understand what I am doingand why I'm doing it and why
that's important to me.
And it now has become importantto them because they can see
what a difference and an impactI am making in the world and
that's special to them.
But they wouldn't if I hadn'tlearned that lesson, gone
(21:32):
through some of those challengesand then actually sat down and
had a conversation with themabout it.
All these personal challenges.
I also, because I've walkedthrough them, I now get to help
teach other people from these.
You listening here on thispodcast today, maybe there was a
little tidbit that you got totake away and you're like, oh,
(21:53):
that's such a good idea, that'sa whole change of perspective.
Maybe I'll try taking adifferent approach to this.
Maybe I'll think about and askmyself different questions
before I invest.
And you got to learn thatlesson because of the lesson
that I learned and the challengethat I went through, and rather
than looking at it like, oh mygosh, like I'm such a failure, I
(22:17):
didn't do this right, no, yougot to learn from me.
Think about how powerful that iswhen you get to learn from
somebody else because of thechallenges they went through and
the lessons they learned fromit, and you get to learn from
that and not have to have yourtime and energy going to going
(22:38):
through that challenge or thatlesson.
You get to just learn from them.
That's huge.
You know what you get to dothat for people too.
You get to learn these lessonsand go through these challenges
and save other people the timeand energy.
When you share those lessons,when you share those challenges,
(22:58):
when you share those growthmoments with people, they get to
learn vicariously through whatyou have gone through.
Think about that ripple effectthat you get to have in the
world, that impact that you getto make because of the lessons
that you get to learn.
So you're not behind, you areexactly where you were supposed
(23:19):
to be, and when you can sharethat journey, when you can share
that journey to that next level, that journey to that
breakthrough with other peoplethat gets to ripple out across
the world I have learned so muchand grown so much from these
lessons and challenges, and nowI get to share that with other
(23:41):
people, you are making a hugeimpact.
Remember that.
Remember that every singlelesson and challenge you go
through, and every time youshare that with somebody else,
they get to have that growthmoment with you as well.
So go out there, continue toput one foot in front of the
(24:03):
other, continue to ask yourselfwhat is this trying to teach me,
when we can follow what ourlessons and our challenges are
trying to teach us.
That is our path.
That is how we know the nextthing that we need to learn, the
next growth moment that we getto have, and lean all the way
(24:25):
into it, and we are one stepcloser to that huge breakthrough
that is there for you.
So lean all the way in.
My friend, I hope you have abeautiful rest of your day and I
will catch you on the nextepisode of Effortlessly
Productive.
You got this.
Hey, this is Annie Veblen-McCarty and I'm gonna
teach you how to be effortlesslyproductive.
I've been an entrepreneur forover 20 years and I got sick and
tired of experts preaching whatbusiness and life should look
like and what I should be doingas a leader and to turn a profit
, only to find myself wastingtime, burned out, feeling
(00:22):
inauthentic and still not makingany money.
On this show, we are ditchingthe shoulds.
I'm giving you permission to dobusiness differently.
As a certified master coach, Ibelieve that everything you need
to have success and build thelife and business of your dreams
is already living on the inside.
(00:43):
I'm going to empower you tolean into what you do best, help
you see your path forwardclearly and give you the
strategy and action steps alongthe way to become effortlessly
productive.
Let's dive in.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Welcome to today's episode of Effortlessly
Productive.
This episode is deeply, deeplyimportant and meaningful to me
and deeply personal as well.
I'm going to share a little bitof my story with you and how
this has played out for me.
So we're going to be talkingabout that belief of feeling
(01:21):
behind.
I coach so many women,especially women in business,
who feel like they are behind.
They see somebody who startedway after them and is
skyrocketed in their success.
They see the years of work thatthey have put in and they look
at all that effort and all thattime and all that energy and
(01:43):
they feel like I should be amillionaire right now.
And they look at all thateffort and all that time and all
that energy and they feel likeI should be a millionaire right
now and they aren't.
There are so many reasons why wemight feel behind in business
and I think that's a normal partof the process.
That can be a normal part ofjust general life too.
Right, I know I had kids a lotlater than other people my age
(02:06):
and there were times where I'mlike, oh, I just feel behind,
like they have all these babiesand I'm not there yet and like I
know that we will have a family, but it just was not the season
for us.
We wanted to wait until alittle bit later, and that was
okay, but there is that pull ofseeing other people have these
things and feeling like we'rebehind, right.
(02:29):
So that's what we're going tobe talking about today and just
having a little bit of aperspective shift on this, and I
want to share again some of myvery personal stories with you
to help you see how you are notbehind.
You are not behind, my friend.
You are being prepared for yournext level.
(02:54):
Anywhere in your life, andespecially in your business,
where you feel like you arebehind, there is a lesson in
there.
Right, there is a reason, thereis a purpose for this growth.
We are going to our next level,and that is okay.
That our path, our growthjourney, does not look the same
(03:16):
as everybody else.
What if every single lessonthat you learn, every single
challenge that you face inbusiness and in life, every
single investment that doesn'tpay off for you, what if every
single one of these things wasactually preparing you for your
biggest breakthrough?
Right, oftentimes we forgetthat there is that next level
(03:40):
waiting for us, that nextversion of ourselves, that huge
breakthrough that we are aboutto have and when we start to
feel behind, we tend to back offand we tend to maybe not learn
those lessons, not face thosechallenges, not invest again,
and that only pushes thatbreakthrough further and further
(04:02):
and further out.
So I'm going to share somelessons that I have learned,
some challenges that I've faced,definitely some investments
that I've made that didn't payoff, and I want you, when these
moments come up, to remember tolean in, to be excited.
Right, we can be excited aboutthe challenges that life throws
(04:23):
our way and business throws ourway, because we know we can
trust that our next level iswaiting right behind that
challenge or that lesson.
So there have been so manycourses that I have invested in
that it sounded great in themoment I'm sure you have those
too.
I literally have my like deadcourse graveyard where it's
(04:46):
stuff that in that moment I waslike this is for me, this is
what I need right now, and I'vehad sometimes, where I invest in
something and my season of lifeor of business shifts like that
, it shifts instantly and Ididn't know that shift was
coming and all of a sudden thatcourse that I had invested in it
(05:07):
was not for the season that Iwas entering, and that's okay,
right.
I know I have bought coursesand gone through them and I was
like, well, that was a waste oftime and money.
Maybe it wasn't what I expected, maybe it didn't go in depth
enough, maybe it was too indepth, maybe it was too long,
maybe it was too short.
(05:27):
There's so many differentcourses that I've paid for and,
for whatever reason, it justdidn't pay off.
It wasn't what I needed in themoment.
But what came out of that is Inow know better what kind of
courses work well for me.
What kind of courses work wellfor me.
I have found, honestly,certifications are something
that skyrocket me into the nextlevel of growth.
(05:51):
I lean so much further in whenI am getting certified in
something and it's not thatevery single thing I do has to
be a certification.
But I know if my heart istelling me and my intuition is
telling me this certification isright for me.
I know a lot of the time thatis going to be that huge
breakthrough.
It's about learning what workswell for us.
(06:13):
Sometimes we have a teacher orsomebody we're learning from
where maybe it's not the bestfit.
So I've learned.
Let's do maybe something freewith them.
Maybe let's do a little bitsmaller of an offer or a
container with them instead ofdoing something huge, because
then I can see if we are areally good fit.
(06:33):
Even sometimes in a masterclassyou don't get a really good fit
.
Even sometimes in a masterclassyou don't get a really good
picture of somebody.
So maybe make a little bitsmaller investment, or maybe
it's you're leaning more intoyour intuition.
I know I have invested in somethings where, if I had really
listened to my intuition, it wastelling me, no, like this is
not the right thing.
But I got caught up in theexcitement.
(06:55):
I got caught up because afriend of mine was doing it and
I wanted to do it too and itsounded so fun and exciting and
I didn't really think about am Iin the season where this is
going to be the best fit for me?
This is the right.
Next thing that I need to learn, not my friend that I need to
learn, and that's okay, becauseI've learned lessons and learned
(07:18):
things to tune into right.
I figured out more questions toask myself before I pushed that
buy button, and I also have hadtimes recently where I've made
a super huge, really scaryinvestment, but my intuition, my
gut and my heart was telling mego for it.
(07:38):
This is for you and because Ihave learned to listen to that
more, that has paid off.
So buying a course or investingin something like that it's not
actually a mistake.
It was helping you learn.
What is your way of learning?
What is the best instructor orcoach or trainer for you?
(07:59):
What is the best format forcourses?
I know for me, having a coursewhere I tune in live is way
better than doing a course whereI just watch videos, but there
are some topics actually thatwatching on video is better than
doing it live.
So it's just about learning.
Every single one of those was alesson that I learned, and now
(08:22):
I know, when I make aninvestment in a course or a
certification, nine times out of10, or maybe even more than
that, 99 times out of 100, it iswhat is going to be good for me
, because I have learned so manylessons along the way.
When it comes to hiring people,too, this is something I get
asked so much.
I have a lot of experience withhiring people.
(08:45):
At this point, my husband'sbusiness has been around when I
am recording this for over 21years.
We have had many employees.
Over those 21 years I also, inmy businesses, have worked with
a lot of different VAs andfreelancers and subcontractors,
and not every single one ofthose works out great.
(09:08):
Sometimes we hire people becausewe literally couldn't find
anybody else to do the job.
At the moment.
The job market has a huge, hugebearing on that right, and so
sometimes we hire somebodybecause we're like I've been
looking and I really just needsomebody to do this, and maybe
it's not the exact rightsomebody, but it's who you have
(09:29):
at the moment.
That's just a lesson that wecan learn, right, that sometimes
we need to wait around for thatright person, or maybe in that
moment it was the best decisionfor us, but later on we want to
make a different decision.
It doesn't mean it was amistake.
Sometimes you are going to hirepeople who seem like they're
(09:49):
going to be a perfect fit foryou and it just isn't, for
whatever reason.
Maybe it's a personalitymismatch, maybe it's the way you
work together.
It just doesn't mesh quiteright.
You don't jive, they're notpicking up what you're putting
down, right, and that's okay.
Maybe it's that they were tooexpensive or maybe they didn't
(10:10):
have the skill set.
But now I know from making somany hiring decisions that maybe
ended up not being the rightdecision.
It's not that it was a mistake.
It's not that I wish that I haddone something differently.
Now I know who to hire better.
I know what questions to askwhen I am hiring.
(10:31):
I know who I want to work with.
I know what kind of person Iwant to work with.
I prefer to work with peoplewho are very self-motivated and
self-driven.
They don't need a lot offeedback and input from me.
And I've hired people who needa lot of input from me, and it's
not that they were a bad VA,it's not that they did a bad job
(10:55):
.
It's just that we had thatmismatch.
So I tend to do better withpeople that I can just be like
here's an idea, I have run withit and do it and I'll look at it
on the back end and we can makesome tweaks from there.
If somebody needs aninstruction every step of the
way, there are otherentrepreneurs out there, other
business owners, who want to begiving those step-by-step
(11:19):
instructions, and so they'regoing to be the perfect VA for
them.
They just weren't for me.
So again, now I know whatquestions to ask.
I know who I'm looking for.
Those were such importantlessons for me to learn.
Imagine if I hadn't learnedthose.
I would still be back where Iwas 21 years ago, hiring people
(11:41):
that weren't the best employeeor VA or contractor for me.
So those are all superimportant lessons.
I've had launches that totallyflopped.
I have held masterclasses thatI promoted for weeks and weeks
and weeks that had only fivepeople register and nobody show
up on the masterclass and ratherthan looking at that like, oh
(12:04):
my gosh, I suck and what I dosucks, I must be a terrible
coach.
I must be a terrible mentor.
I must be a terrible mentor.
I must be a terrible trainer.
No, maybe the subject that Iwas doing the masterclass on
wasn't what my people werelooking for.
Maybe my messaging was just offand it didn't hit with them.
(12:26):
Maybe I didn't promote it tothe best of my ability.
Maybe I didn't promote it onthe right platforms where my
people were.
Maybe I forgot to set upreminders that the call was
coming.
There's so many differentlessons that I've learned along
the way by launches actuallycompletely flopping.
(12:47):
I learned so much more whenthings flop than when things
skyrocket.
Imagine the first thing thatyou put out there.
Let's say you had 50 peoplesign up for it.
You might not have learnedlessons from that, right, but
when we do things that don'twork, we actually learn more
lessons from it, and that way wecan make so many more changes
(13:09):
and do things so muchdifferently the next time.
It gives us so much more datathan when things work and we
don't know why it worked.
It makes it really hard toduplicate and replicate the next
time we want to launchsomething.
So those are all just lessons.
I have sold offers that I endedup heating, heating, delivering
(13:33):
on the back end, and there isalmost nothing worse right?
It's a terrible feeling whenyou sell something and then
you're like, oh my gosh, Iseriously dislike showing up for
this call every single week.
Or this was an ongoingcontainer and now I don't want
to continue it, and I have totell everybody in this container
(13:55):
that it's not going to beongoing, that I am going to end
it.
I've done that before and itwas really hard.
That was a huge, huge challengeto show up to a mastermind and
tell people that my businessdirection had shifted or that my
heart wasn't in that anymoreand that I wanted to go a
(14:15):
different direction.
But I did it and that was achallenge that I learned from.
Some people love offering thingsthat are ongoing forever and
ever and ever.
For me.
I tend to like to do shorterthings and again, that was just
something I had to learn byoffering that and realizing I
didn't like that container, Ididn't like that container, I
(14:36):
didn't like teaching in thatcontainer.
But that's okay, because I willnever make the mistake of
offering that again.
Again, it wasn't even a mistake.
It was a huge lesson that Ilearned.
So there are things that I havesold that I ended up not liking
delivering on on the back end,and you know what.
That was just that learningmoment of I don't have to do
(15:00):
this in my business.
This way, I am my own businessowner.
I get to decide what I offer.
Just because that works forsomebody else does not mean that
works for me.
Just because somebody elseloves building this for people
doesn't mean that I also lovebuilding it.
There are so many differentlessons to take out of that.
Then we also have a lot ofchallenges.
(15:22):
There are so many challengesthat I have faced.
I have had times in my life andin my business where I have just
packed my schedule way too busyto the point where I had no
room for creativity, where I hadno room to actually go and work
on my business because I was sostuck in working with my
(15:43):
clients and I love working withmy clients but when I don't even
have the ability to bring onnew clients because my entire
schedule is consumed withserving the clients I already
have, we start and stop right.
Our momentum in our businessstart and stop that was
something that I have had toexperience is I have so much of
(16:04):
my time going to my client workand delivering what I've
promised to clients that I don'tactually have time to work on
my own business to find moreclients.
And when those contracts end,when those containers end, then
the business is stopped becauseI have not continued to build
the momentum and I did notcontinue doing what was working
(16:25):
for me because I literallydidn't have the time or energy.
So packing my schedule too fullor packing it full of other
kinds of appointments that werenot paying clients that is a
pitfall that I have fallen intoand I have learned a huge lesson
, thank goodness, from thosechallenges, because now I know
(16:46):
what my optimum schedule is ofmaking sure I'm capping the
number of calls and appointments.
I'll take every single week ofbuilding containers where I can
serve more people at the sametime instead of a limited number
of clients.
There's so many solutions thatI have come up with to that, but
(17:06):
I wouldn't have come up withthose if I didn't have those
challenges in the first place.
I also have had seasons wherethe kids were home.
Covid was a huge learninglesson for me in business with
that of all of a sudden, inblink of an eye, everything
changed and I suddenly had threekids at home with me, 24, seven
(17:27):
, and the time and energy that Ihad for my business looked very
different than it had even theweek before and I had to make
some shifts and that was a hugechallenge.
But you know what I learned?
To be adaptable.
I learned to be flexible, Ileaned in to what was the most
important thing to me at thattime, in that season of my life.
(17:49):
And we are all going to haveseasons that we walk through
where the unexpected happens,our life changes in the blink of
an eye and our priorities and,what's most important, shifts,
and that's okay, but goingthrough that challenge helped me
understand how to cope withthat.
So the next time that happensin my life, that will not be an
(18:11):
isolated case, I guarantee.
The next time that happens, thenext time I have a challenge
like that.
I've been through it, so now Iknow how to better shift my
business and shift my focus andmy attention to make sure that I
am staying aligned with mypriorities and what's important
to me.
I've also had times where I justliterally stretched myself too
(18:34):
thin like not even with clients,with volunteering for certain
things for field trips, forexample, for my kids or for
serving on the board of theirlacrosse club and I've had to
realize that that didn't alignwith my business goals and it
didn't align with my personalgoals and it wasn't how I wanted
(18:56):
to be spending my time.
So I've gotten very, very clearon what I do and do not want to
put my time and energy into,and so I have now been able to
set up expectations with my kidsof I will go on one field trip
a year with each one of you, sothat's three field trips a year
and I will do your field day atthe end of the year, but I'm not
(19:19):
going to all the million otherschool things in between.
I'm not going to sign up tochaperone every single field
trip that your class takes, andthat is okay.
And I actually sat down and hada conversation with my kids
about this and asked them what'sthe most important thing to you
that I come to?
I can come to your educationweek where parents can come into
(19:43):
the classroom.
I can come into class parties.
I can come in to read to yourclass.
I can do field day.
I can do field trips, but weneed to pick like one or two
things.
I'm not going to come to everysingle thing because I literally
would spend my entire time withthree kids and the ages they
(20:03):
are.
It would literally be everysingle week would be chunked up
with things going on with theirclass and that just doesn't
align with my business goals ormy personal goals, and that's
okay.
And it makes those times that Ido get to chaperone their field
trip or help with their fieldday even more special and even
(20:23):
more meaningful.
So I get to lean all the wayinto those and they get to lean
all the way into those, insteadof me showing up scattered and
chaotic and just running allover the place and distracted,
because I know that there arethings in my business that I'm
missing.
Doing that I really want to bedoing Having that conversation
(20:45):
with my kids about why I do whatI do, why it's so important to
me and why I want to make thisimpact.
They understand better.
And now you know those timeswhere the kids will fill out
like the Mother's Day cards orwhatever write a sweet little
note that their teachers arelike let's write somebody a
letter, like they talk about thepeople that I help and why
(21:08):
that's so important, how I'mmaking a difference in the world
.
They understand what I am doingand why I'm doing it and why
that's important to me.
And it now has become importantto them because they can see
what a difference and an impactI am making in the world and
that's special to them.
But they wouldn't if I hadn'tlearned that lesson, gone
(21:32):
through some of those challengesand then actually sat down and
had a conversation with themabout it.
All these personal challenges.
I also, because I've walkedthrough them, I now get to help
teach other people from these.
You listening here on thispodcast today, maybe there was a
little tidbit that you got totake away and you're like, oh,
(21:53):
that's such a good idea, that'sa whole change of perspective.
Maybe I'll try taking adifferent approach to this.
Maybe I'll think about and askmyself different questions
before I invest.
And you got to learn thatlesson because of the lesson
that I learned and the challengethat I went through, and rather
than looking at it like, oh mygosh, like I'm such a failure, I
(22:17):
didn't do this right, no, yougot to learn from me.
Think about how powerful that iswhen you get to learn from
somebody else because of thechallenges they went through and
the lessons they learned fromit, and you get to learn from
that and not have to have yourtime and energy going to going
(22:38):
through that challenge or thatlesson.
You get to just learn from them.
That's huge.
You know what you get to dothat for people too.
You get to learn these lessonsand go through these challenges
and save other people the timeand energy.
When you share those lessons,when you share those challenges,
(22:58):
when you share those growthmoments with people, they get to
learn vicariously through whatyou have gone through.
Think about that ripple effectthat you get to have in the
world, that impact that you getto make because of the lessons
that you get to learn.
So you're not behind, you areexactly where you were supposed
(23:19):
to be, and when you can sharethat journey, when you can share
that journey to that next level, that journey to that
breakthrough with other peoplethat gets to ripple out across
the world I have learned so muchand grown so much from these
lessons and challenges, and nowI get to share that with other
(23:41):
people, you are making a hugeimpact.
Remember that.
Remember that every singlelesson and challenge you go
through, and every time youshare that with somebody else,
they get to have that growthmoment with you as well.
So go out there, continue toput one foot in front of the
(24:03):
other, continue to ask yourselfwhat is this trying to teach me,
when we can follow what ourlessons and our challenges are
trying to teach us.
That is our path.
That is how we know the nextthing that we need to learn, the
next growth moment that we getto have, and lean all the way
(24:25):
into it, and we are one stepcloser to that huge breakthrough
that is there for you.
So lean all the way in.
My friend, I hope you have abeautiful rest of your day and I
will catch you on the nextepisode of Effortlessly
Productive.
You got this.
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