March 16, 2022 • 30 mins
This week we are diving head first into the area of healthy boundaries and time management a perfect follow up from our episodes on courageous conversations.
Leveling up on our ability to have brave conversations provides the perfect framework to now focus on cultivating new healthy boundaries and ensuring you start owning your time as the most precious resource you have.
There is a very good chance that even if you had good boundaries pre 2020 these have blurred so we are sure this is the perfect time to be sharing these curated insights.
Our action challenge this week: Write down 3 areas of your life that feel out of control and would benefit from a refocus. Jot down some thoughts around how to overcome. Then start for a whole week to mindfully track your time and get ready for our next episode.
SHOW NOTES:
Zeigarnik effect
Laura Vanderkam, Off the Clock
Nir Eyal, Indistractable
Gary Keller & Jay Papersan, The One Thing
In a January 2022 Trends Report by the American Psychological Association - called Burnout and Stress Are Everywhere - https://www.apa.org/monitor/2022/01/special-burnout-stress
Right to Disconnect: https://www.cnbc.com/2021/06/22/right-to-disconnect-could-become-the-norm-in-europe.html
Portrugal takes it one step further for parents: https://www.bbc.com/news/business-59263300#:~:text=Portugal%20has%20banned%20bosses%20from,from%20home%20in%20the%20country
To Do Lists don't work: https://www.wired.com/story/to-do-apps-failed-productivity-tools/
Who is responsible: https://www.fastcompany.com/90720956/who-is-responsible-for-protecting-work-life-balance-it-depends-who-you-ask
How much is too much that its not efficient?: https://www.atlassian.com/blog/productivity/this-is-how-many-hours-you-should-really-be-working
Music created by Claire's daughter Hannah
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Miranda (00:00):
Welcome to season two of the elevate with grace
podcast, for women who are shorton time and long to take steps
to create success on their ownterms.
This podcast is here for womenwho feel overworked,
underappreciated, and stuck in aconstant world of spinning
plates and want more from life.
We take the Intel out there andcurate it to the highest value
insights.
Miranda (2) (00:20):
We combine it with lived experiences to offer
bite-sized actionable tips.
So you can look back at the endof the quarter and the end of
the year, knowing that you wereworking towards achieving
success on your own terms.
Claire (00:32):
Hey, Hey, welcome to episode three, season two of the
elevate with grace podcast.
I'm Claire and with me is mybrave and energetic cohost
Miranda.
I've had a great couple of weekssince our last podcast.
I've been continuing with mybeing kind to myself challenge
and doubling down on payingattention to not getting swept
up in the hustle, always onmindset that I have.
(00:55):
Pretty bad habit of doing beforeinitiating my own great personal
reset during the COVID pandemic.
It's actually pretty tough tostay attentive, to creating time
in my week for those activitiesthat will get me the longterm
results I want for living lifeon my terms.
But As we head towards the endof the first three months of
2022, I'm feeling quite goodabout sticking to the goals I
(01:16):
set for myself for the first bitof this year.
How have you been travelingthese last couple of weeks?
Miranda?
Miranda (01:22):
quite literally traveling and doing great.
So for the first time, in two
Miranda (2) (01:26):
year
Miranda (01:27):
I've been back in the air.
In itself feels quite surreal.
While traveling is definitely alittle bit more stressful than
it was with all the PCRs anddifferent paperwork and
regulations, it's fabulous to beback in the wider world and,
really seeing what's happeningand that growth the tapping in
other countries.
Back in the middle east and I'mjust always inspired it's just a
wonderful dichotomy of futureand past.
(01:48):
They've got the world.
A moment.
They've just opened the museumof the future.
It's just super inspiring andabsolutely incredible.
So yes, good times.
Funnily in all of my flightsback and forward, I have
actually been really tappinginto the Hamilton soundtrack.
I've always been a bit of amovie soundtrack in the plane
kind of girl.
Some of my other ones are gone,but I know you are a huge
(02:10):
Hamilton fan.
And when I first saw it, I wasdefinitely quite emotional.
The family and the female kindof pieces just irked me, I
think.
But listening to the soundtracknow I have absolutely I'm
hooked.
I'm just singing along in myhead all the time.
It's quite incredible.
I just love the storyline ofthat rebuilding and starting
again and starting fresh.
(02:30):
And some great learnings.
I think as we've ventured intothis new world, I love to see
parliament rapping, but he go,I'm a convert Lin-Manuel is an
absolute genius, but it took mea while to join your bandwagon.
Claire (02:41):
Ah, that's good to hear that.
I'm pretty excited.
I was in Melbourne, CBD, notquite the middle east.
I was near there setting up theHamilton theater because it's
coming to Melbourne from Sydney.
We've got tickets in may.
And yeah, I had goosebumps as Iwas walking past the theater the
other day.
So I'm pretty prompt that you'vegot excited and into Hamilton.
(03:02):
It was definitely my go-to inCOVID and I'm looking forward to
seeing live yeah, it's good.
Miranda (03:07):
Fantastic and congratulations on continuing
the be kind movement withyourself.
I hope we all continue to do itevery day, it hard to just turn
off that negative language anddefinitely in the research for
the time and boundaries.
Generally women will default tothis I'm not good enough, why
can't I just focus and why can'tI do more kind of mentality.
Super keen for our discussionover this next two pods.
(03:29):
Because we do need to learn tobecome to ourselves and find
these tips and tricks to makethis section of our lives a lot
easier.
I am incredibly mindful that forme, this has been the hardest
area to solve.
Time management and boundariescan be really tough and
something that it's one of theselifelong practices.
You've just got to continuechecking in on and improving.
Last year we spoke about sort ofcapacity of time management with
(03:50):
the ideas of round one thing,miracle morning, focusing on
those important versus theurgent tasks, making sure we're
not swept up in emails and awhole lot of meetings for
meetings sake, I think strongtime management and clear
boundaries definitely deserve adeeper dive as these areas that
are so essential to achievingyour goals.
And we're too busy when we'retoo burned out we just don't
show up as our best selves.
(04:11):
We start focusing on survivalrather than on how do we achieve
the best in the week, how do weachieve the best in our goals?
Without getting some parametersaround time and boundaries, we
are not going to have enoughspace to achieve our goals so we
can set great habits but theboundaries to make sure that we
can continue to deliver onthose.
We can set great objectives andplan our calendar.
But if we don't have great timemanagement, we're not going to
(04:32):
tick those off.
This is just like a crucialpuzzle that, we really need to
check in with.
Claire (04:36):
Yeah, I'm really pumped at the topics of healthy
boundaries and time managementthe focus of this podcast and
our next podcast in afortnight's time.
It ties in nicely with our lastcouple of conversations on
courageous conversations,because leveling up on our
ability to have braveconversations, I think will
absolutely help us to create andmaintain healthy boundaries for
(04:57):
ourselves.
If you haven't already, I wouldlove for you to go and check our
first to season two pods oncourageous conversations,
because I think it's all veryintricately related.
Time and boundaries and talkingabout them is key to that.
They help us thrive, but it'salso really important.
And I think as women, we alsolike to think about.
Others a lot as well.
(05:18):
And the thing is with healthyboundaries and better time
management, if we're thriving inthat allows us to be able to
thrive and support, our lovedones and our colleagues as well.
There's, there's that dualbenefit from them and, with only
so much time in a day, and wecan't create more hours in the
day.
I think a lot of us often saythat if only we could, but we
can't.
(05:39):
And you know how we look afterour time and we create
boundaries around that time isreally important.
Miranda (05:46):
Couldn't agree more.
Time is our most preciousresource.
Everyone has exactly the sameamount of time in their week in
the year.
So, time is definitely somethingthat we can learn to harness and
do a lot more with.
You mentioned about how womenjust are intuitively wanting to
help and through COVID.
I think we really saw that womenwere, the statistics.
(06:07):
I think we're up to 60% morelikely to take on other people's
burdens through COVID or be thatlistening ear and try and help
out.
Somewhere in there areboundaries have become quite
blurred.
Pre 20, 20, maybe some of usactually had some good
boundaries around going to workswitching off and having that
home space not answering emailsover a certain time or switching
off on the weekend.
(06:27):
More important than ever now toreally consider what the
boundaries you used to have.
And hopefully we can tap into,ones that are better for us as
we go forward.
Miranda (2) (06:35):
There's lots of things I think we need to reset
on.
A great segway to our actionchallenge, because I want you to
think about this while you'relistening to the podcast.
So action.
The site is to reflect on anyboundaries and time systems that
you've let slip, identify threeareas better discipline around
both time and boundaries wouldhelp you find clarity and peace
of mind.
(06:55):
Write these down along with somethoughts on how you will
overcome these or how you'veovercome these in the past.
And then the next episode, we'regoing to share those key tips to
help build this out further.
You're going to do thefoundations here and then we're
going to really help you pieceto this out and for bonus points
with this action challenge, Ireally do recommend you jot down
where your time goes in theweek.
So we'll talk abouttime-blocking in the future,
(07:17):
recording your minutes ratherthan your hours and thinking
about, what you do from the timeyou wake up to the time you go
for bed, even over just oneweek.
Definitely some benefits aroundthat time chunking and
understanding where you'respending your time.
Claire (07:29):
One of the popular topic of conversation at the moment is
the doom scrolling, on yourphone.
So I do check how much time I'mspending on my phone and I've
put time limits on, 15 minutesacross Insta.
LinkedIn and Facebook, so thatit's just reminded me.
It's like, all right, cool.
You've had your play I thinkthat's good.
So that, to thinking about whereyou could be and that's not to
(07:49):
say that we shouldn't bewatching a good Netflix show or
doing any of that stuff.
That's all very important, butthere is an awareness and
mindfulness that can come fromhow we're spending our time and
doing those activities.
Miranda (08:01):
What app do you use to give you that alert on your
socials on Often you can sit youcan set time.
Yeah.
You can set time limits on youriPhone.
Very cool.
Claire (08:11):
It's interesting.
What you said.
I think there is 24 7.
Always on digital world.
That was never going anywherepre COVID.
But certainly this blurring ofall the lines, you don't really
get that third space.
I think the thing that we've gotto realize is that our work
situation, anything, it can blurall of those lines.
So you have to be in a positionto create your own boundaries.
(08:32):
In January of this year, theAmerican psychological
association did a trends reportabout that the COVID-19 pandemic
has introduced new stresses tonearly every domain of our life.
And as the world heads into ourthird year of the pandemic, the
stresses have become persistentand indefinite so we need to
create some sort of reset of ourown really.
(08:54):
And I think this conversationaround time and boundaries
looking at some of theliterature out there and
preparing for the podcast.
It does make you realize thatyou do need to be accountable
for that yourself.
The article actually calls foran action on employers and
legislators.
In my mind, that's also anaction on ourselves.
So there's a three elements.
(09:15):
There's that macro element thatwe need to talk about.
And then you've got the workhome element more specifically
in that, but also we can takeaccountability too.
And I think we have a part toplay in that as well.
But it is, you agree with that,but I do think that I think we
spoke about it.
In our last episode, how womendon't tend to take on like
higher responsibility roles,because they believe that comes
(09:38):
with the company.
Miranda (09:39):
And they're going to have to give up all their extra
time and it's going to be a realburden on them.
I do think that the higher youare in management, the greater,
the ability to be able to sortof fix your own time, set some
really clear boundaries withyour team on when you're
available, when you're notavailable.
When you're more in that middlemanagement, or lower management
there can be a realencroachment.
And if everybody else hasaccepting that behavior, there
(10:02):
is probably a little bit of peerpressure that you too would
accept that time constraint.
So absolutely we need to be ableto set our own boundaries.
And I've seen a couple of peopledo that where they've gone
across the tide and they've beencalled out for not having the
same passion or fire in theirbelly.
It's actually, it's like, no,no, no.
This, person's got reallyhealthy boundaries and the rest
of us need to learn how to adaptto those.
(10:22):
It takes that one or two toshine a light.
And it's interesting thatgenerally, particularly at that
like GM level, doesn't quiteunderstand that distinction.
They just think, oh, they'rejust not motivated.
So I am all for a bit oflegislation and I think it's
really interesting that somecountries have been, recognizing
that this challenge is a huge.
(10:43):
I thought Paris led the way onthis one.
I saw some legislation, I think2018 where they put this mandate
that you will not allowed toemail or make calls or anything
after 7:00 PM.
That was it.
You had to switch off.
Doing a little bit of Googling.
It was actually originallyimplemented by Germany in 2013
it's called the right todisconnect Initially they were
stopping their ministers fromcontacting their workforce after
(11:04):
hours.
That sort of led this trend thatFrance in 2017 and then last
year Portugal followed suitwe've got these great slack and
teams as well as email and text.
And people kind of just usethose brain dump at any time of
the night or any time of themorning.
And that leads to other things,particularly if they haven't
turned those notifications off.
(11:25):
a huge challenge and it's goodto see some countries leading
the way there is whispers thatAustralia might be attention.
Claire (11:31):
Ah yeah.
I think, Portugal, the lawschange late last year.
Companies that have more than 10staff could face fines if they
text message or email employeesoutside of their contracted
hours.
They also introduced new laws,on allowing staff with children
to work remotely.
So parents will be allowed towork remotely at home
(11:52):
indefinitely without seekingprior approval from their
employers until their childturns eight.
So there's massive.
Yeah.
So I know.
Yeah.
So there's obviously lots ofconversation going on,
particularly in Melbourne andSydney about returning to work
and what that looks like forlarge corporates.
Certainly with families thathave primary school age kids, it
(12:14):
has been a bit of the silverlinings.
I thought that was reallyinteresting that you basically
have the right to work.
At home until their child turnseight.
Interesting.
With the time management I thinkthe one book hands down that you
introduced me to, that we did abook review in season one
episode five of the one thing.
And the mantra from that book ismy go-to when I think about time
(12:38):
management.
So what's the one thing that ifI do it right now will make
everything easier or unnecessaryand yeah, I encouraged you to go
and listen to our podcast onthat, because it's a really
great concepts and ideas abouthow you can apply the one thing,
practically in our sense,there's some of the stuff that
we took away from itpractically, but I think it can
help what's.
(12:58):
One thing that I'm going to dothis week, or the three things
that I'm going to nail thisweek.
Keeping it to that really hashelped me a lot from a time
management perspective?
Miranda (13:06):
Yeah, absolutely.
When it comes to time managementas I mentioned before time is
the great equalizer.
Everybody has the same amount oftime.
And what we do with it is wherethe magic comes into play.
There is a lot of researcharound meetings and meetings for
meetings, sake and emails andhow people use all those
productivity tools to actually.
Make themselves feel comfortablein their busy, but not be
(13:27):
completing those importanttasks.
A really interesting statisticthat 89% of to-do lists are
never completed.
6,000 respondents in 2012,LinkedIn did a survey.
Go to the point of writing downthese to-do lists.
I think we've just got a reallydifferent logic of what that
looks like.
Maybe by writing down 10 things,because it's everything that's
in our brain, but actually.
(13:48):
One thing sort of perspective.
There might only be one or threeof those that really important.
the rest shouldn't sit there.
there's some sort of thoughtleadership around just
calendaring in those tasks.
There is obviously a lot ofdigital apps that have been
created.
And so people going onto thedigital apps and 40 to 50 tasks
are never being completed, whichwould be fine if we could just
(14:09):
be really cool and mellow aboutinterestingly, the majority of
tasks are all ticked off withinthe first day of being put into
the app.
I guess what that sort ofindicating is that we're looking
for that gratification ofticking them off, as opposed to
those big tasks that need to bedone.
this is actually a bit of a lotground here that by putting the
tasks on your to-do list thatyou're not doing by doing
(14:31):
meetings and things that youdon't really need, that there's
actually a mental brain suckthat's happening.
So tasks that are sittinguncompleted sit in our
subconscious and they might sortof pop up at 2:00 AM in the
morning, or they might pop upwhen you're driving and they're
using our mental load.
It's actually, so bad there's aname for it.
It's called the Zeigarnikeffect.
I'm going to put that one in theshow notes.
(14:52):
It was a 1920s that explore theimpact on our brain when we
leave tasks, incompleted, andjust the incredible ability of
our brain to remember somethingand quickly forget it when
they're completed, but to attackour brain system when they are
not completed.
The examples given where likewaiters in a restaurant they can
instantly remember your mealuntil they've served it and then
(15:12):
it's gone.
And they could not recall thatan hour later, the same goes for
up to do this.
If we've already in the doubtand we'd sitting there, it's
Checkbook.
And if we don't take that off,our mental checkbook keeps
going, Hey, Hey, what aboutthis?
You've forgot about this.
What about this?
A lot of the times they'rereally menial tasks that are not
worth that important brain load.
So super fascinating.
And I think when people go timemanagement, oh yeah, that's
(15:34):
nice.
But I'm too busy to plan.
I just want to get in and get itall done.
The big caveat to that is ifyou're not taking charge of
things, It's taking charge ofyou.
So you really want to make surethat you're thinking quite
consciously about that timemanagement.
I think there's this there's somany ways that we can be busy.
There was a book that I wasreading it was called off the
clock by Laura Vanderbilt.
(15:55):
She was highlighting that a lotof managers keep the calendars
really full that empty space ina calendar where you should be
doing work is actuallyuncomfortable for people because
that doesn't represent Izzy inthe work culture.
A busy work culture means yourcalendars are fully blocked.
There was some controversialconversation around these.
So the example they had was thisreally cool senior level manager
(16:16):
who calendar was completelyavailable.
And he was like, yeah, I don'tunderstand why people can't
manage their calendars.
You know, I've got lots of freetime.
I must've been, I firstreflected on what he was saying
and going that's probablybecause you've given a whole lot
of women and you're just doingyour essentials but I do think
that if we protect our time morepreciously, make sure there's an
(16:37):
agenda for meetings and ensurethat we've got some gaps in our
calendar.
Even if we just make them greeninstead of blue so that we know
that it's focused work time,that you've got the ability to
really manage your time and notjust give that to other people.
some very fascinating pieces.
Claire (16:50):
Yeah, that is really interesting.
I was thinking As we're talkingabout going back into the office
space I've been part of quite afew conversations that are I've
looked at my diary tomorrow andI'm just in zoom meeting after
zoom meeting, after zoommeeting, what's the point in
going into the office and I wantto catch up with people.
I had Becoming quite consciousof that.
So if I know that I'm going togo into the office, making sure
(17:11):
that whatever spare spots thereare, I'm blocking them so that I
am going to make the most ofinteracting with people in 3d,
because we've got to think aboutways to get those gaps.
And I think there's a bit of aconversation at the moment.
I can't think off the top of myhead, who's written a book on
it.
I feel like it was the guy whodid.
Lost connections.
(17:32):
And it's a book about how we'velost our focus and how focus
time is so important.
But we're so used to just beingbusy and then we're finding it
really hard when we areconfronted with blank spaces in
our diaries, where do I evenstart with focused work and deep
thinking?
So, all of.
the stuff we'll talk about tipsand tricks and how to get better
(17:54):
time management and boundariesin the next pod.
But that stuff I think will helpwith some of these challenges
that we're trying to face withconcentrating and finding focus
percent.
Miranda (18:06):
Which types nicely back into boundaries and making sure
bring out boundaries back to theworkforce.
And I must admit, I've reallynever been great at boundaries.
Probably 2017.
I started to really learn how tocultivate these.
I've still have loads to learn.
I do think that thoughtleadership has also got a long
way to go around boundaries.
I think a lot of boundarysetting within the workspace is
(18:27):
perceived as still a bit selfishand there's some negative
connotations around what theseboundaries mean.
and maybe I've just been readingthe wrong books, but I've also
found it very much targetingwomen, not being able to set
boundaries, not men, even maleand female authors that have
been perpetuating this kind ofconversation of the busy female
who is taking on their family'sload, they're taking on their
(18:48):
workload, they're taking on allof the key stakeholder pieces,
community groups, et cetera.
I found that quite fascinating,but also quite frustrating
because I do think boundariesare actually very kind, they're
kind to yourself and they kindto your team and your family.
With clear boundaries, yourteam's going to know when you're
available to them, they're goingto receive your dedicated
(19:09):
attention.
They know that within thispocket of time that you're
dedicating to them, the boundarythat you've set is that you are
available.
Um, and also that they kind ofprepare because they know that
your boundary also says.
Once you've had that meeting,that they need to go away and
get their work done so that youcan go and get your work done,
um, rather than constantlypopping in and, and being that
(19:29):
distraction, I think at home,you also, you know, you know,
constantly compromise with yourwork.
So it means you're going to bemore present at home or
involved, but that they'll alsoknow when you need your
boundaries for work and respectthose, because you're not doing
it every night.
It's a once-off thing ratherthan an ongoing, and that maybe
they can offer you that space.
To complete those importanttasks.
Now that one also comes withgetting kids to really
(19:51):
understand that you are a humanbeing that also needs doing
stuff.
Boundaries really ensure that,your workplace really get the
best out of you.
It's that the perception of workis very different.
If your colleagues are takingadvantage, in breaking your
boundaries they don't know whatyour boundaries are versus your
workplace.
So if your workplace isupsetting that boundary setting,
then we're going to get quitedisenfranchised if your
colleagues across thoseboundaries.
(20:13):
I think you can address it quitedirectly.
Like you said, the micro versusthe macro lens to solve issues,
but you should definitely speakup per our last podcast.
You need to be communicatingwhat your boundaries are and
that brave person in myworkplace that was like, no, no,
no.
It took a little while forpeople to understand what that
looked like and what that meant.
And then also start to copy herlead by going, oh, actually
(20:34):
that's a really safe boundary.
And I feel like I can achievemore if I can carve out that
time for myself.
Claire (20:39):
We are definitely, a bit of a precipice of what all this
means because with the COVIDpandemic the work and home lives
blurring, it does become aninteresting challenge around
health and wellbeing and theresponsibilities of employers in
terms of creating health andwellbeing.
I was listening to a podcast theother day.
They were talking about
Miranda (21:00):
this
Claire (21:00):
and it reminded me a little bit about what my dad
used to say to me when I was akid, don't do as I do do, as I
say, but in organizations, itdoesn't really matter how many
policies a company puts out andwhat they speak of in terms of
their supporting health,wellbeing boundaries.
the reality is, as you mentionedearlier, the general managers,
the senior people are.
(21:22):
Working long hours and it'stransparent that they're working
long hours.
And then the perception ofpeople in the organization is
the ones that working those longhours that are getting paid,
rises, notice promotions, how dowe break cycle.
and I think we're not there yet.
In terms of where theresponsibilities of employers
and employees lie, there was anarticle by fast company, that
(21:45):
talks to who is responsible forcreating the boundaries around
your work.
Is it you or your company?
And a recent survey that theytalked to you in the article
conducted by a company calledtrue software 43% of employees
believe that the responsibilityfalls squarely on them.
the study actually identified astriking difference of opinion
(22:06):
across generations.
So where the majority of workersover 45 believed, establishing
and enforcing those boundariesis their own personal
responsibility.
That perspective was only sharedby just on 40% of those aged
under 45.
The truce software CEO.
Said that he distinguished thatbetween those people who begin
(22:27):
their careers in an era whenbringing homework was a
conscious decision we had thoseboundaries, we didn't have this
creep of technology from workthat they could access us
anywhere on our phones, So thosewho started in a working era
where they could be reached 24 7via email slack, zoom.
All of those workplace toolstypically expected their
(22:48):
employers to support and model astrong work-life divide.
Miranda (22:52):
Wow.
You certainly seeing thatpushback from millennials, but
this helps it make sense.
Which is, Hey you can't give meall these tools and not give
some perimeters around how we'reusing them and make sure it's
consistent across all of thepeople within my team, it's
really, really good clarity.
Claire (23:09):
Yeah, I thought that was interesting.
And the distinction between thetwo modes Millennials or those
that have grown up in thatavailability of tools that can
get access to you wheneverthey're their belief that the
employers need to be doing morein that space.
And I think one of the criticalthings is, what's management
doing it, we have to be carefulabout what we're saying versus
(23:31):
what we're doing.
And what's observed as this iswhat we say, but really the
subculture is if I can accessGeorge seventy-five percent of
the time, and I can only access.
50% of the time after hours, howconscious is management being
about how they're treating thosesituations, because it's making
it difficult to have thatcorrect boundary management and
(23:54):
setting within organizations.
It's an interesting space andhopefully we'll get a lot better
at understanding theresponsibilities.
Lawmakers employers andemployees, because in today's
world, it can't just be like itwas, which has goodbye.
I'm leaving at 5:00 PM and youcan't access me.
my mum when she used to work atthe bank, if they were on the
(24:14):
phone, And another customertried to call you'd get the busy
tone, so you could only everanswer one call at a time.
Whereas now, you have to be likecyborgs, people can be
contacting us five differentways at the one time and you've
resolved all that.
Right.
It's just a different world andthe conversations around
responsibilities.
For boundary setting is biggernow because of the world that we
(24:37):
live in.
I think, just one other pointthat I wanted to make about the
work-life balancing, just somefood for thought is a sort of an
article written by LaSeon lastyear.
Putting forward.
The fact that there's quite alot of evidence that doing more
than 50 to 55 hours of work aweek does not necessarily equate
(24:58):
to higher productivity.
In fact, it actually starts toimpede on your productivity.
So there's a really good casestudy there to say that if
people are working more than 50,55 hours a week, they're
actually not.
Generating better results foryour organization.
just because the hours are beingput in.
As a, an additional kicker onthat, if you're looking for some
(25:22):
reasons to set some boundariesand have some of those
courageous conversations,there's a study from the world
health organization that foundworking an average of 55 hours
or more each week increases yourrisk of stroke by 35%.
And your risk of dying fromheart disease by 17% compared to
those working in average of 35to 40 hours a week.
Miranda (25:42):
It's about really making sure that yeah, those
boundaries are in place, butalso the value of you spending
that much time working and thenfighting your brain to keep
focused.
Because your brain sort of underattack, that you are more prone
to triggers.
To procrastinating, so random todo is your brains going to be
like, I need a break.
so you'll find yourselfscrolling on social media, or
(26:03):
going to go for a walk and get acoffee.
And your brain does need thosebreaks.
It's one every hour it'ssupposed to have a bit of a
recharge.
But what we tend to do is thenbeat ourselves up because I'm
procrastinating.
Oh, I've lost that.
Whatever.
we deep dive into these wastedtasks that take half an hour of
it actually offered no value toyour important pieces.
(26:24):
And then you're giving up timewith your family.
You're giving up time at the gymbecause somehow things.
You have to put that much workin, you have to take as much off
your, to do list as you can,which we've already discussed.
It's almost impossible.
89% of people aren't taking offthe, to do list.
So if that's what you need toget out the door, he's hardly
setting yourself up for failure.
So back to that, let's actuallytrack our time for the next two
(26:46):
to two weeks.
Let's understand what being fromthe time we wake up to the time
we're going to sleep.
There was some data around thisin terms of how many hours are
we actually working versus howmany hours do I think we're
working?
And imagine what this study isshowing is that that work
obviously is draining you'rethen carrying that mental load.
Whereas if you were to dedicate10 of those hours, maybe to
social engagements, meeting withyour friends or your family, you
(27:08):
actually underestimate how muchtime you spend there.
And it feels like you have moretime in your week when you're
doing those social activities.
When you're dedicating that timeto things that filled your cup
up.
So other ways you can hack timeis actually to make sure that
you're focusing on those highperformance tasks for four
hours, five hours, but the areactually carving out that really
quality family time and suchbecause it makes you feel.
(27:31):
That your wakes better that yourweek is actually bigger than
what you are.
If you're just sitting therecramming at the desk every day
and can't remember what you weredoing for half of it.
I think really time to use ourtime.
as I mentioned before, LauraVanderkam, off the clock has
great, pieces around this andspeaking about how we're using
our time, why we're using ourtime in these different ways.
Claire (27:51):
I think that's a perfect segue to recap on what our
action challenges for thefortnight ahead, because that
context that you've just set upthere It's really good context
for the action challenges, weget mindful about this stuff.
Then get into some of the waysthat we can work on this stuff
in a couple of weeks time.
Miranda (28:09):
Absolutely the challenge for this episode is to
reflect on any past boundariesand time systems that you've let
slip.
To identify three areas wherebetter discipline around time
and boundaries would help youfind help you on clarity and
peace of mind.
Write these down along with somethoughts on how you've overcome
these in the past or how youthink you could overcome these.
And in the next episode, we'regoing to share those key tips on
(28:31):
helping you to build out thatkit further.
And then I really do urge you todo that time mapping.
So grab your calendar and justreally be mindful, almost a time
sheet for the next week, writedown everything you're doing
from the time you wake up to thetime you go to sleep and start
to see if you can find some gapsthat are not what she thought
they were.
(28:51):
So we can really dig deeper inour next pods.
So as always with the contentwe've mentioned today in the pod
episode notes.
You can check them out over thenext week and dip into some of
the stuff that resonates withyou and will inspire you to take
small, actionable steps for yourown success journey.
Please also check out ourwebsite, elevate with grace.com
that I use or hop onto ourInstagram for curated content.
(29:14):
We'd love, love, love to hearfrom you and how you're going on
this journey.
Please give us an email atelevatewithgrace@gmail.com.
And we'd love you to like andsubscribe to this podcast and
please do share it with anyoneyou think could add some value
into their day by getting someof these great tips.
In our next episode, we'll begetting into some tools, tricks,
(29:35):
and for leveling up on yourboundary setting and time
management muscle and how tocreate them.
This is where the action and thereal beauty comes in.
With you again in a fortnight'stime.
Claire, thank you so much forthis podcast.
I always love hanging out withyou.
Thank you listeners.
I am so grateful for you.
Claire (29:51):
Yes.
It's been a great chat.
I've really enjoyed.
I've learned a bunch of stufffrom you as I always do you say
thank you so much.
And I'll speak to you very soonand see you in a fortnight's
time listeners.
Welcome to season two of the elevate with grace
podcast, for women who are shorton time and long to take steps
to create success on their ownterms.
This podcast is here for womenwho feel overworked,
underappreciated, and stuck in aconstant world of spinning
plates and want more from life.
We take the Intel out there andcurate it to the highest value
insights.
Miranda (2) (00:20):
We combine it with lived experiences to offer
bite-sized actionable tips.
So you can look back at the endof the quarter and the end of
the year, knowing that you wereworking towards achieving
success on your own terms.
Claire (00:32):
Hey, Hey, welcome to episode three, season two of the
elevate with grace podcast.
I'm Claire and with me is mybrave and energetic cohost
Miranda.
I've had a great couple of weekssince our last podcast.
I've been continuing with mybeing kind to myself challenge
and doubling down on payingattention to not getting swept
up in the hustle, always onmindset that I have.
(00:55):
Pretty bad habit of doing beforeinitiating my own great personal
reset during the COVID pandemic.
It's actually pretty tough tostay attentive, to creating time
in my week for those activitiesthat will get me the longterm
results I want for living lifeon my terms.
But As we head towards the endof the first three months of
2022, I'm feeling quite goodabout sticking to the goals I
(01:16):
set for myself for the first bitof this year.
How have you been travelingthese last couple of weeks?
Miranda?
Miranda (01:22):
quite literally traveling and doing great.
So for the first time, in two
Miranda (2) (01:26):
year
Miranda (01:27):
I've been back in the air.
In itself feels quite surreal.
While traveling is definitely alittle bit more stressful than
it was with all the PCRs anddifferent paperwork and
regulations, it's fabulous to beback in the wider world and,
really seeing what's happeningand that growth the tapping in
other countries.
Back in the middle east and I'mjust always inspired it's just a
wonderful dichotomy of futureand past.
(01:48):
They've got the world.
A moment.
They've just opened the museumof the future.
It's just super inspiring andabsolutely incredible.
So yes, good times.
Funnily in all of my flightsback and forward, I have
actually been really tappinginto the Hamilton soundtrack.
I've always been a bit of amovie soundtrack in the plane
kind of girl.
Some of my other ones are gone,but I know you are a huge
(02:10):
Hamilton fan.
And when I first saw it, I wasdefinitely quite emotional.
The family and the female kindof pieces just irked me, I
think.
But listening to the soundtracknow I have absolutely I'm
hooked.
I'm just singing along in myhead all the time.
It's quite incredible.
I just love the storyline ofthat rebuilding and starting
again and starting fresh.
(02:30):
And some great learnings.
I think as we've ventured intothis new world, I love to see
parliament rapping, but he go,I'm a convert Lin-Manuel is an
absolute genius, but it took mea while to join your bandwagon.
Claire (02:41):
Ah, that's good to hear that.
I'm pretty excited.
I was in Melbourne, CBD, notquite the middle east.
I was near there setting up theHamilton theater because it's
coming to Melbourne from Sydney.
We've got tickets in may.
And yeah, I had goosebumps as Iwas walking past the theater the
other day.
So I'm pretty prompt that you'vegot excited and into Hamilton.
(03:02):
It was definitely my go-to inCOVID and I'm looking forward to
seeing live yeah, it's good.
Miranda (03:07):
Fantastic and congratulations on continuing
the be kind movement withyourself.
I hope we all continue to do itevery day, it hard to just turn
off that negative language anddefinitely in the research for
the time and boundaries.
Generally women will default tothis I'm not good enough, why
can't I just focus and why can'tI do more kind of mentality.
Super keen for our discussionover this next two pods.
(03:29):
Because we do need to learn tobecome to ourselves and find
these tips and tricks to makethis section of our lives a lot
easier.
I am incredibly mindful that forme, this has been the hardest
area to solve.
Time management and boundariescan be really tough and
something that it's one of theselifelong practices.
You've just got to continuechecking in on and improving.
Last year we spoke about sort ofcapacity of time management with
(03:50):
the ideas of round one thing,miracle morning, focusing on
those important versus theurgent tasks, making sure we're
not swept up in emails and awhole lot of meetings for
meetings sake, I think strongtime management and clear
boundaries definitely deserve adeeper dive as these areas that
are so essential to achievingyour goals.
And we're too busy when we'retoo burned out we just don't
show up as our best selves.
(04:11):
We start focusing on survivalrather than on how do we achieve
the best in the week, how do weachieve the best in our goals?
Without getting some parametersaround time and boundaries, we
are not going to have enoughspace to achieve our goals so we
can set great habits but theboundaries to make sure that we
can continue to deliver onthose.
We can set great objectives andplan our calendar.
But if we don't have great timemanagement, we're not going to
(04:32):
tick those off.
This is just like a crucialpuzzle that, we really need to
check in with.
Claire (04:36):
Yeah, I'm really pumped at the topics of healthy
boundaries and time managementthe focus of this podcast and
our next podcast in afortnight's time.
It ties in nicely with our lastcouple of conversations on
courageous conversations,because leveling up on our
ability to have braveconversations, I think will
absolutely help us to create andmaintain healthy boundaries for
(04:57):
ourselves.
If you haven't already, I wouldlove for you to go and check our
first to season two pods oncourageous conversations,
because I think it's all veryintricately related.
Time and boundaries and talkingabout them is key to that.
They help us thrive, but it'salso really important.
And I think as women, we alsolike to think about.
Others a lot as well.
(05:18):
And the thing is with healthyboundaries and better time
management, if we're thriving inthat allows us to be able to
thrive and support, our lovedones and our colleagues as well.
There's, there's that dualbenefit from them and, with only
so much time in a day, and wecan't create more hours in the
day.
I think a lot of us often saythat if only we could, but we
can't.
(05:39):
And you know how we look afterour time and we create
boundaries around that time isreally important.
Miranda (05:46):
Couldn't agree more.
Time is our most preciousresource.
Everyone has exactly the sameamount of time in their week in
the year.
So, time is definitely somethingthat we can learn to harness and
do a lot more with.
You mentioned about how womenjust are intuitively wanting to
help and through COVID.
I think we really saw that womenwere, the statistics.
(06:07):
I think we're up to 60% morelikely to take on other people's
burdens through COVID or be thatlistening ear and try and help
out.
Somewhere in there areboundaries have become quite
blurred.
Pre 20, 20, maybe some of usactually had some good
boundaries around going to workswitching off and having that
home space not answering emailsover a certain time or switching
off on the weekend.
(06:27):
More important than ever now toreally consider what the
boundaries you used to have.
And hopefully we can tap into,ones that are better for us as
we go forward.
Miranda (2) (06:35):
There's lots of things I think we need to reset
on.
A great segway to our actionchallenge, because I want you to
think about this while you'relistening to the podcast.
So action.
The site is to reflect on anyboundaries and time systems that
you've let slip, identify threeareas better discipline around
both time and boundaries wouldhelp you find clarity and peace
of mind.
(06:55):
Write these down along with somethoughts on how you will
overcome these or how you'veovercome these in the past.
And then the next episode, we'regoing to share those key tips to
help build this out further.
You're going to do thefoundations here and then we're
going to really help you pieceto this out and for bonus points
with this action challenge, Ireally do recommend you jot down
where your time goes in theweek.
So we'll talk abouttime-blocking in the future,
(07:17):
recording your minutes ratherthan your hours and thinking
about, what you do from the timeyou wake up to the time you go
for bed, even over just oneweek.
Definitely some benefits aroundthat time chunking and
understanding where you'respending your time.
Claire (07:29):
One of the popular topic of conversation at the moment is
the doom scrolling, on yourphone.
So I do check how much time I'mspending on my phone and I've
put time limits on, 15 minutesacross Insta.
LinkedIn and Facebook, so thatit's just reminded me.
It's like, all right, cool.
You've had your play I thinkthat's good.
So that, to thinking about whereyou could be and that's not to
(07:49):
say that we shouldn't bewatching a good Netflix show or
doing any of that stuff.
That's all very important, butthere is an awareness and
mindfulness that can come fromhow we're spending our time and
doing those activities.
Miranda (08:01):
What app do you use to give you that alert on your
socials on Often you can sit youcan set time.
Yeah.
You can set time limits on youriPhone.
Very cool.
Claire (08:11):
It's interesting.
What you said.
I think there is 24 7.
Always on digital world.
That was never going anywherepre COVID.
But certainly this blurring ofall the lines, you don't really
get that third space.
I think the thing that we've gotto realize is that our work
situation, anything, it can blurall of those lines.
So you have to be in a positionto create your own boundaries.
(08:32):
In January of this year, theAmerican psychological
association did a trends reportabout that the COVID-19 pandemic
has introduced new stresses tonearly every domain of our life.
And as the world heads into ourthird year of the pandemic, the
stresses have become persistentand indefinite so we need to
create some sort of reset of ourown really.
(08:54):
And I think this conversationaround time and boundaries
looking at some of theliterature out there and
preparing for the podcast.
It does make you realize thatyou do need to be accountable
for that yourself.
The article actually calls foran action on employers and
legislators.
In my mind, that's also anaction on ourselves.
So there's a three elements.
(09:15):
There's that macro element thatwe need to talk about.
And then you've got the workhome element more specifically
in that, but also we can takeaccountability too.
And I think we have a part toplay in that as well.
But it is, you agree with that,but I do think that I think we
spoke about it.
In our last episode, how womendon't tend to take on like
higher responsibility roles,because they believe that comes
(09:38):
with the company.
Miranda (09:39):
And they're going to have to give up all their extra
time and it's going to be a realburden on them.
I do think that the higher youare in management, the greater,
the ability to be able to sortof fix your own time, set some
really clear boundaries withyour team on when you're
available, when you're notavailable.
When you're more in that middlemanagement, or lower management
there can be a realencroachment.
And if everybody else hasaccepting that behavior, there
(10:02):
is probably a little bit of peerpressure that you too would
accept that time constraint.
So absolutely we need to be ableto set our own boundaries.
And I've seen a couple of peopledo that where they've gone
across the tide and they've beencalled out for not having the
same passion or fire in theirbelly.
It's actually, it's like, no,no, no.
This, person's got reallyhealthy boundaries and the rest
of us need to learn how to adaptto those.
(10:22):
It takes that one or two toshine a light.
And it's interesting thatgenerally, particularly at that
like GM level, doesn't quiteunderstand that distinction.
They just think, oh, they'rejust not motivated.
So I am all for a bit oflegislation and I think it's
really interesting that somecountries have been, recognizing
that this challenge is a huge.
(10:43):
I thought Paris led the way onthis one.
I saw some legislation, I think2018 where they put this mandate
that you will not allowed toemail or make calls or anything
after 7:00 PM.
That was it.
You had to switch off.
Doing a little bit of Googling.
It was actually originallyimplemented by Germany in 2013
it's called the right todisconnect Initially they were
stopping their ministers fromcontacting their workforce after
(11:04):
hours.
That sort of led this trend thatFrance in 2017 and then last
year Portugal followed suitwe've got these great slack and
teams as well as email and text.
And people kind of just usethose brain dump at any time of
the night or any time of themorning.
And that leads to other things,particularly if they haven't
turned those notifications off.
(11:25):
a huge challenge and it's goodto see some countries leading
the way there is whispers thatAustralia might be attention.
Claire (11:31):
Ah yeah.
I think, Portugal, the lawschange late last year.
Companies that have more than 10staff could face fines if they
text message or email employeesoutside of their contracted
hours.
They also introduced new laws,on allowing staff with children
to work remotely.
So parents will be allowed towork remotely at home
(11:52):
indefinitely without seekingprior approval from their
employers until their childturns eight.
So there's massive.
Yeah.
So I know.
Yeah.
So there's obviously lots ofconversation going on,
particularly in Melbourne andSydney about returning to work
and what that looks like forlarge corporates.
Certainly with families thathave primary school age kids, it
(12:14):
has been a bit of the silverlinings.
I thought that was reallyinteresting that you basically
have the right to work.
At home until their child turnseight.
Interesting.
With the time management I thinkthe one book hands down that you
introduced me to, that we did abook review in season one
episode five of the one thing.
And the mantra from that book ismy go-to when I think about time
(12:38):
management.
So what's the one thing that ifI do it right now will make
everything easier or unnecessaryand yeah, I encouraged you to go
and listen to our podcast onthat, because it's a really
great concepts and ideas abouthow you can apply the one thing,
practically in our sense,there's some of the stuff that
we took away from itpractically, but I think it can
help what's.
(12:58):
One thing that I'm going to dothis week, or the three things
that I'm going to nail thisweek.
Keeping it to that really hashelped me a lot from a time
management perspective?
Miranda (13:06):
Yeah, absolutely.
When it comes to time managementas I mentioned before time is
the great equalizer.
Everybody has the same amount oftime.
And what we do with it is wherethe magic comes into play.
There is a lot of researcharound meetings and meetings for
meetings, sake and emails andhow people use all those
productivity tools to actually.
Make themselves feel comfortablein their busy, but not be
(13:27):
completing those importanttasks.
A really interesting statisticthat 89% of to-do lists are
never completed.
6,000 respondents in 2012,LinkedIn did a survey.
Go to the point of writing downthese to-do lists.
I think we've just got a reallydifferent logic of what that
looks like.
Maybe by writing down 10 things,because it's everything that's
in our brain, but actually.
(13:48):
One thing sort of perspective.
There might only be one or threeof those that really important.
the rest shouldn't sit there.
there's some sort of thoughtleadership around just
calendaring in those tasks.
There is obviously a lot ofdigital apps that have been
created.
And so people going onto thedigital apps and 40 to 50 tasks
are never being completed, whichwould be fine if we could just
(14:09):
be really cool and mellow aboutinterestingly, the majority of
tasks are all ticked off withinthe first day of being put into
the app.
I guess what that sort ofindicating is that we're looking
for that gratification ofticking them off, as opposed to
those big tasks that need to bedone.
this is actually a bit of a lotground here that by putting the
tasks on your to-do list thatyou're not doing by doing
(14:31):
meetings and things that youdon't really need, that there's
actually a mental brain suckthat's happening.
So tasks that are sittinguncompleted sit in our
subconscious and they might sortof pop up at 2:00 AM in the
morning, or they might pop upwhen you're driving and they're
using our mental load.
It's actually, so bad there's aname for it.
It's called the Zeigarnikeffect.
I'm going to put that one in theshow notes.
(14:52):
It was a 1920s that explore theimpact on our brain when we
leave tasks, incompleted, andjust the incredible ability of
our brain to remember somethingand quickly forget it when
they're completed, but to attackour brain system when they are
not completed.
The examples given where likewaiters in a restaurant they can
instantly remember your mealuntil they've served it and then
(15:12):
it's gone.
And they could not recall thatan hour later, the same goes for
up to do this.
If we've already in the doubtand we'd sitting there, it's
Checkbook.
And if we don't take that off,our mental checkbook keeps
going, Hey, Hey, what aboutthis?
You've forgot about this.
What about this?
A lot of the times they'rereally menial tasks that are not
worth that important brain load.
So super fascinating.
And I think when people go timemanagement, oh yeah, that's
(15:34):
nice.
But I'm too busy to plan.
I just want to get in and get itall done.
The big caveat to that is ifyou're not taking charge of
things, It's taking charge ofyou.
So you really want to make surethat you're thinking quite
consciously about that timemanagement.
I think there's this there's somany ways that we can be busy.
There was a book that I wasreading it was called off the
clock by Laura Vanderbilt.
(15:55):
She was highlighting that a lotof managers keep the calendars
really full that empty space ina calendar where you should be
doing work is actuallyuncomfortable for people because
that doesn't represent Izzy inthe work culture.
A busy work culture means yourcalendars are fully blocked.
There was some controversialconversation around these.
So the example they had was thisreally cool senior level manager
(16:16):
who calendar was completelyavailable.
And he was like, yeah, I don'tunderstand why people can't
manage their calendars.
You know, I've got lots of freetime.
I must've been, I firstreflected on what he was saying
and going that's probablybecause you've given a whole lot
of women and you're just doingyour essentials but I do think
that if we protect our time morepreciously, make sure there's an
(16:37):
agenda for meetings and ensurethat we've got some gaps in our
calendar.
Even if we just make them greeninstead of blue so that we know
that it's focused work time,that you've got the ability to
really manage your time and notjust give that to other people.
some very fascinating pieces.
Claire (16:50):
Yeah, that is really interesting.
I was thinking As we're talkingabout going back into the office
space I've been part of quite afew conversations that are I've
looked at my diary tomorrow andI'm just in zoom meeting after
zoom meeting, after zoommeeting, what's the point in
going into the office and I wantto catch up with people.
I had Becoming quite consciousof that.
So if I know that I'm going togo into the office, making sure
(17:11):
that whatever spare spots thereare, I'm blocking them so that I
am going to make the most ofinteracting with people in 3d,
because we've got to think aboutways to get those gaps.
And I think there's a bit of aconversation at the moment.
I can't think off the top of myhead, who's written a book on
it.
I feel like it was the guy whodid.
Lost connections.
(17:32):
And it's a book about how we'velost our focus and how focus
time is so important.
But we're so used to just beingbusy and then we're finding it
really hard when we areconfronted with blank spaces in
our diaries, where do I evenstart with focused work and deep
thinking?
So, all of.
the stuff we'll talk about tipsand tricks and how to get better
(17:54):
time management and boundariesin the next pod.
But that stuff I think will helpwith some of these challenges
that we're trying to face withconcentrating and finding focus
percent.
Miranda (18:06):
Which types nicely back into boundaries and making sure
bring out boundaries back to theworkforce.
And I must admit, I've reallynever been great at boundaries.
Probably 2017.
I started to really learn how tocultivate these.
I've still have loads to learn.
I do think that thoughtleadership has also got a long
way to go around boundaries.
I think a lot of boundarysetting within the workspace is
(18:27):
perceived as still a bit selfishand there's some negative
connotations around what theseboundaries mean.
and maybe I've just been readingthe wrong books, but I've also
found it very much targetingwomen, not being able to set
boundaries, not men, even maleand female authors that have
been perpetuating this kind ofconversation of the busy female
who is taking on their family'sload, they're taking on their
(18:48):
workload, they're taking on allof the key stakeholder pieces,
community groups, et cetera.
I found that quite fascinating,but also quite frustrating
because I do think boundariesare actually very kind, they're
kind to yourself and they kindto your team and your family.
With clear boundaries, yourteam's going to know when you're
available to them, they're goingto receive your dedicated
(19:09):
attention.
They know that within thispocket of time that you're
dedicating to them, the boundarythat you've set is that you are
available.
Um, and also that they kind ofprepare because they know that
your boundary also says.
Once you've had that meeting,that they need to go away and
get their work done so that youcan go and get your work done,
um, rather than constantlypopping in and, and being that
(19:29):
distraction, I think at home,you also, you know, you know,
constantly compromise with yourwork.
So it means you're going to bemore present at home or
involved, but that they'll alsoknow when you need your
boundaries for work and respectthose, because you're not doing
it every night.
It's a once-off thing ratherthan an ongoing, and that maybe
they can offer you that space.
To complete those importanttasks.
Now that one also comes withgetting kids to really
(19:51):
understand that you are a humanbeing that also needs doing
stuff.
Boundaries really ensure that,your workplace really get the
best out of you.
It's that the perception of workis very different.
If your colleagues are takingadvantage, in breaking your
boundaries they don't know whatyour boundaries are versus your
workplace.
So if your workplace isupsetting that boundary setting,
then we're going to get quitedisenfranchised if your
colleagues across thoseboundaries.
(20:13):
I think you can address it quitedirectly.
Like you said, the micro versusthe macro lens to solve issues,
but you should definitely speakup per our last podcast.
You need to be communicatingwhat your boundaries are and
that brave person in myworkplace that was like, no, no,
no.
It took a little while forpeople to understand what that
looked like and what that meant.
And then also start to copy herlead by going, oh, actually
(20:34):
that's a really safe boundary.
And I feel like I can achievemore if I can carve out that
time for myself.
Claire (20:39):
We are definitely, a bit of a precipice of what all this
means because with the COVIDpandemic the work and home lives
blurring, it does become aninteresting challenge around
health and wellbeing and theresponsibilities of employers in
terms of creating health andwellbeing.
I was listening to a podcast theother day.
They were talking about
Miranda (21:00):
this
Claire (21:00):
and it reminded me a little bit about what my dad
used to say to me when I was akid, don't do as I do do, as I
say, but in organizations, itdoesn't really matter how many
policies a company puts out andwhat they speak of in terms of
their supporting health,wellbeing boundaries.
the reality is, as you mentionedearlier, the general managers,
the senior people are.
(21:22):
Working long hours and it'stransparent that they're working
long hours.
And then the perception ofpeople in the organization is
the ones that working those longhours that are getting paid,
rises, notice promotions, how dowe break cycle.
and I think we're not there yet.
In terms of where theresponsibilities of employers
and employees lie, there was anarticle by fast company, that
(21:45):
talks to who is responsible forcreating the boundaries around
your work.
Is it you or your company?
And a recent survey that theytalked to you in the article
conducted by a company calledtrue software 43% of employees
believe that the responsibilityfalls squarely on them.
the study actually identified astriking difference of opinion
(22:06):
across generations.
So where the majority of workersover 45 believed, establishing
and enforcing those boundariesis their own personal
responsibility.
That perspective was only sharedby just on 40% of those aged
under 45.
The truce software CEO.
Said that he distinguished thatbetween those people who begin
(22:27):
their careers in an era whenbringing homework was a
conscious decision we had thoseboundaries, we didn't have this
creep of technology from workthat they could access us
anywhere on our phones, So thosewho started in a working era
where they could be reached 24 7via email slack, zoom.
All of those workplace toolstypically expected their
(22:48):
employers to support and model astrong work-life divide.
Miranda (22:52):
Wow.
You certainly seeing thatpushback from millennials, but
this helps it make sense.
Which is, Hey you can't give meall these tools and not give
some perimeters around how we'reusing them and make sure it's
consistent across all of thepeople within my team, it's
really, really good clarity.
Claire (23:09):
Yeah, I thought that was interesting.
And the distinction between thetwo modes Millennials or those
that have grown up in thatavailability of tools that can
get access to you wheneverthey're their belief that the
employers need to be doing morein that space.
And I think one of the criticalthings is, what's management
doing it, we have to be carefulabout what we're saying versus
(23:31):
what we're doing.
And what's observed as this iswhat we say, but really the
subculture is if I can accessGeorge seventy-five percent of
the time, and I can only access.
50% of the time after hours, howconscious is management being
about how they're treating thosesituations, because it's making
it difficult to have thatcorrect boundary management and
(23:54):
setting within organizations.
It's an interesting space andhopefully we'll get a lot better
at understanding theresponsibilities.
Lawmakers employers andemployees, because in today's
world, it can't just be like itwas, which has goodbye.
I'm leaving at 5:00 PM and youcan't access me.
my mum when she used to work atthe bank, if they were on the
(24:14):
phone, And another customertried to call you'd get the busy
tone, so you could only everanswer one call at a time.
Whereas now, you have to be likecyborgs, people can be
contacting us five differentways at the one time and you've
resolved all that.
Right.
It's just a different world andthe conversations around
responsibilities.
For boundary setting is biggernow because of the world that we
(24:37):
live in.
I think, just one other pointthat I wanted to make about the
work-life balancing, just somefood for thought is a sort of an
article written by LaSeon lastyear.
Putting forward.
The fact that there's quite alot of evidence that doing more
than 50 to 55 hours of work aweek does not necessarily equate
(24:58):
to higher productivity.
In fact, it actually starts toimpede on your productivity.
So there's a really good casestudy there to say that if
people are working more than 50,55 hours a week, they're
actually not.
Generating better results foryour organization.
just because the hours are beingput in.
As a, an additional kicker onthat, if you're looking for some
(25:22):
reasons to set some boundariesand have some of those
courageous conversations,there's a study from the world
health organization that foundworking an average of 55 hours
or more each week increases yourrisk of stroke by 35%.
And your risk of dying fromheart disease by 17% compared to
those working in average of 35to 40 hours a week.
Miranda (25:42):
It's about really making sure that yeah, those
boundaries are in place, butalso the value of you spending
that much time working and thenfighting your brain to keep
focused.
Because your brain sort of underattack, that you are more prone
to triggers.
To procrastinating, so random todo is your brains going to be
like, I need a break.
so you'll find yourselfscrolling on social media, or
(26:03):
going to go for a walk and get acoffee.
And your brain does need thosebreaks.
It's one every hour it'ssupposed to have a bit of a
recharge.
But what we tend to do is thenbeat ourselves up because I'm
procrastinating.
Oh, I've lost that.
Whatever.
we deep dive into these wastedtasks that take half an hour of
it actually offered no value toyour important pieces.
(26:24):
And then you're giving up timewith your family.
You're giving up time at the gymbecause somehow things.
You have to put that much workin, you have to take as much off
your, to do list as you can,which we've already discussed.
It's almost impossible.
89% of people aren't taking offthe, to do list.
So if that's what you need toget out the door, he's hardly
setting yourself up for failure.
So back to that, let's actuallytrack our time for the next two
(26:46):
to two weeks.
Let's understand what being fromthe time we wake up to the time
we're going to sleep.
There was some data around thisin terms of how many hours are
we actually working versus howmany hours do I think we're
working?
And imagine what this study isshowing is that that work
obviously is draining you'rethen carrying that mental load.
Whereas if you were to dedicate10 of those hours, maybe to
social engagements, meeting withyour friends or your family, you
(27:08):
actually underestimate how muchtime you spend there.
And it feels like you have moretime in your week when you're
doing those social activities.
When you're dedicating that timeto things that filled your cup
up.
So other ways you can hack timeis actually to make sure that
you're focusing on those highperformance tasks for four
hours, five hours, but the areactually carving out that really
quality family time and suchbecause it makes you feel.
(27:31):
That your wakes better that yourweek is actually bigger than
what you are.
If you're just sitting therecramming at the desk every day
and can't remember what you weredoing for half of it.
I think really time to use ourtime.
as I mentioned before, LauraVanderkam, off the clock has
great, pieces around this andspeaking about how we're using
our time, why we're using ourtime in these different ways.
Claire (27:51):
I think that's a perfect segue to recap on what our
action challenges for thefortnight ahead, because that
context that you've just set upthere It's really good context
for the action challenges, weget mindful about this stuff.
Then get into some of the waysthat we can work on this stuff
in a couple of weeks time.
Miranda (28:09):
Absolutely the challenge for this episode is to
reflect on any past boundariesand time systems that you've let
slip.
To identify three areas wherebetter discipline around time
and boundaries would help youfind help you on clarity and
peace of mind.
Write these down along with somethoughts on how you've overcome
these in the past or how youthink you could overcome these.
And in the next episode, we'regoing to share those key tips on
(28:31):
helping you to build out thatkit further.
And then I really do urge you todo that time mapping.
So grab your calendar and justreally be mindful, almost a time
sheet for the next week, writedown everything you're doing
from the time you wake up to thetime you go to sleep and start
to see if you can find some gapsthat are not what she thought
they were.
(28:51):
So we can really dig deeper inour next pods.
So as always with the contentwe've mentioned today in the pod
episode notes.
You can check them out over thenext week and dip into some of
the stuff that resonates withyou and will inspire you to take
small, actionable steps for yourown success journey.
Please also check out ourwebsite, elevate with grace.com
that I use or hop onto ourInstagram for curated content.
(29:14):
We'd love, love, love to hearfrom you and how you're going on
this journey.
Please give us an email atelevatewithgrace@gmail.com.
And we'd love you to like andsubscribe to this podcast and
please do share it with anyoneyou think could add some value
into their day by getting someof these great tips.
In our next episode, we'll begetting into some tools, tricks,
(29:35):
and for leveling up on yourboundary setting and time
management muscle and how tocreate them.
This is where the action and thereal beauty comes in.
With you again in a fortnight'stime.
Claire, thank you so much forthis podcast.
I always love hanging out withyou.
Thank you listeners.
I am so grateful for you.
Claire (29:51):
Yes.
It's been a great chat.
I've really enjoyed.
I've learned a bunch of stufffrom you as I always do you say
thank you so much.
And I'll speak to you very soonand see you in a fortnight's
time listeners.
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