October 26, 2023 • 25 mins
I promise that in today's episode, we're going to help you make sense of financial turbulence that follows traumatic life events. We all know how quickly life can throw curveballs our way, like a natural disaster, a job loss, a divorce or even the loss of a loved one. These unexpected moments can leave us feeling helpless and emotionally battered, not to mention financially strained. Let me walk you through the steps to regain control, and find your financial footing once again, using the right tools and resources.
To do that we dive into defensive strategies to survive financially post-trauma. And of course, understanding your new financial landscape: your expenses, your income, and how to balance them in a budget plays a vital role.
To make this easier, I've put together a free guide just for you with 10 essential tips. Download it at https://thefinancialmoment.com/budget-tips/ .
And let's not forget about credit recovery and dealing with debt, as these can take a serious hit during a traumatic event. So join us, and let's take that first step towards financial recovery together.
Let’s Stay Connected!
🌐 Website: thefinancialmoment.com
📸 Instagram: @thefinancialmoment
💼 Money Coaching: Need deeper support? Visit my website to learn how we can help you take control of your finances.
📢 If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, rate, and review the podcast! Your support helps us reach more people on their financial journey.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Carolyn (00:00):
Hello everyone.
My name is Carolyn.
Welcome to the Saving for yourFirst Home podcast.
I am the CEO of the FinancialMoment.
We offer money coaching forthose who are ready and willing
to make financial changes intheir lives.
For the most of us, there comesa point in time where we think
to ourselves it would be reallynice to own property, but it
(00:22):
sometimes can feel like a pipedream and not very easily
obtainable.
So I created this podcast togive you all the information and
tools you need to take thesteps forward toward home
ownership.
Take it from me my husband andI started our lives together,
working part-time jobs with ayoung child.
Fast forward, through manyhiccups and failures, we stepped
(00:43):
our feet into our very firsthome.
For us it was a pile of dirt,but eventually our family home
was built on that dirt.
Now we are in the midst ofgrowing our investment property
portfolio.
I created the savings for yourfirst home podcast to give you
easy, actionable tools for youto do the same.
If you have that same gutfeeling that I did and want to
(01:06):
create a life for yourself andyour growing family, but don't
know where to start, you are inthe right place.
Let's do this.
Hello everyone and welcome backto the Saving for your First
Home podcast.
I'm Carolyn, your money coach.
So how are you guys doing?
I'm finding myself kind of in acleanup mode, you know, trying
(01:27):
to get rid of some of the oldstuff, things that you don't use
anymore, don't you find?
When you clear out things andyou have all this additional
space, you kind of wonderyourself why did you hang on to
it for so long?
Right, and I had to give myselfsome grace, because, although I
know my whole house needs a bigoverhaul and for me to go
(01:48):
through every closet and everydrawer, I just couldn't manage
all that in a weekend.
And so what I did and I said tomyself was you know what, let's
just pick one thing.
If I can accomplish one thing,I'm going to feel so much better
and it's going to be like astepping stone towards finishing
up the entire space.
So that's what I did.
(02:09):
I just opened up my closet thiscloset is the one where all
your jackets and shoes and allthis stuff ends up and I took
everything out, you know, and Isorted it in piles and, one by
one, we went through each thingand decided do we want to keep
it or do we want to get rid ofit?
Afterwards we had a pile ofwhat we were going to donate and
(02:33):
what we're going to sell andyou know, and we look at the
closet and it is so freeingknowing that there's all this
space.
And you know, we're alwaysfighting for hangers and like
there's a ton of hangers now andit was just really refreshing
we were able to close the doorwithout problem.
Anyway, just having said all ofthat, it just kind of reminded
(02:56):
me that when we have big,overwhelming things or tasks
that we need to do, it'simportant just to take a step
back and say you know what I cando one thing and I can do one
thing well, and focus on thatand see what you can accomplish.
This is kind of what's leadingme into today's topic, and it's
(03:18):
a difficult one, to be honestwith you, because you know I've
heard from several people thattheir financial problems are not
problems that they kind ofbrought on themselves.
It's due to a traumatic event.
Now, this can come in so manydifferent forms.
Right, we can have a medicalemergency, where that causes us
(03:42):
to have substantial medicalbills or lost income.
It could be a natural disasterlike a hurricane or a flood or
an earthquake or wildfire.
You know we've having so manyof these things lately and these
are not things that you cancontrol, right?
I think I said on my podcast Ihad booked a trip to Hawaii and
(04:05):
just before we were about toleave, a few weeks before, there
was that major wildfire thathappened and I feel for those
people I mean, majority of thatarea that was destroyed was
historical places, people thathave lived and had generations
grow up in that neighborhood andso I really feel for the areas
(04:26):
that have been hit by hurricanesand floods and earthquakes and
wildfires because you know theyare the ones that have to pick
up after severe devastation totheir home and belongings, and a
lot of these places don't evenprovide for adequate insurance
coverage.
So you know it really issomething that it's hard to kind
(04:50):
of bounce back from, but it's.
Having said that, there areother things that you know that
also are traumatic events in ourlives, for example, a job loss
or unemployment.
Sometimes these kind of thingshappen suddenly.
You don't even realize.
Like you know, the company islaying off like 300 people and
you just happen to be one ofthem and you know you were just
(05:11):
going into work that day and allof a sudden now your life has
been thrown upside down and youknow you have no income coming
in.
How do you cover your dailyexpenses?
Your obligations, mortgage,rent, all these different things
like flood your mind and youhave to adjust and it's very,
very difficult.
You know I personally have gonethrough this before where you
(05:35):
know we've had a sudden job lossin our family and it really
takes a toll, not onlyfinancially, but your mental
health really is affected bysomething like this.
It not only does it impact you,it impacts the people around
you.
Another thing where it involvesyour family is a divorce or a
(05:57):
separation or even a death inthe family.
Like.
There are so many costs thatare associated with these types
of events, like legal costs,court costs, child support that
now needs to be paid Someonethat is now coming from a double
income dropping down to asingle income family.
It's very hard to kind ofadjust when you're so used to
(06:21):
being in a certain way andtaking care of in a certain way
that to have to go through allof that and clear all of those
costs and expenses, bring on newexpenses and then try to figure
it all out with one income isvery difficult and can lead to a
lot of financial strain.
And I mentioned the death of afamily member, right, if we're
(06:43):
not prepared for these thingsfuneral expenses, settling in a
state, you know, even the lossof that particular family
member's income can createfinancial hardship.
These type of things have avery big impact on the family
financially, but also as afamily unit just adjusting to
(07:03):
all the change.
And so you know, having somestrategies and ways to cope with
this is very important.
Let's talk about theft.
You know theft can come in theform of identity theft that's
what we're seeing more and moreof now which can lead to
financial fraud and authorizedcharges and then legal expenses
(07:24):
that try and resolve that typeof issue.
I mean, I know that each one ofyou that are listening to this
podcast have experienced a scamcall or someone that has kind of
reached out in a very, you know, sneaky way and kind of gotten
information from you.
People have had their accountslocked, money taken, like it is
(07:47):
just right now.
Identity theft is very, veryrampant and you have to be so
careful with your information,and we're also having a lot of
property damage in theft.
A lot of vehicles are beingstolen.
When we go out of a pandemic andwe're going into sort of what
we call a recession, it's verydifficult for people and we're
(08:08):
going to see that crime is kindof escalating.
So burglaries, vandalism,property damage that you may
have to incur and having toreplace it, dealing with the
hassle of the insurance,everything these events are just
so prevalent now and then, as Ithink about it even more, I
(08:31):
think about people that strugglewith substance abuse and
addictions, the mental healthissues and the family kind of
going through this.
You know they have to deal withmaybe some legal problems that
result from this, or medicalproblems and added debt, to be
honest with you, and all of thiscan lead to an ability to work
(08:53):
and have substantial medicalexpenses for therapy and other
things that they need to helpthem cope through these certain
challenges.
Now, I am not a counselor or atherapist or anything like that.
All I do know is that, comingout of situations like this,
after the dust has settled, onceyou have kind of understood
(09:17):
what the problem was, you'regetting help, you're dealt with
all the legal implications andthen you're left with the
financial burden that any one ofthese problems can bring.
What do you do now?
And I thought I'd talk a littlebit about how to cope when
you're trying to get back onyour feet, and it just leaves me
(09:39):
back to my original littlestory that I had over the
weekend, which is just tackleone thing at a time.
So I'm going to go through somestrategies that I hope that you
put it in your back pocket,because I'm hoping that for all
of you you don't experience anyof these things.
But you know, maybe that timemay come where you need some
(10:01):
kind of strategy to get throughand back on your feet again.
So let's talk about somestrategies that can provide some
guidance and support for anyonewho has faced a difficult
circumstance.
So if any of you have children,you'll understand the feeling
that I'm about to describe.
(10:21):
So your child has donesomething, whether they were
running or jumping or you knowsomething that you probably have
told them a million times notto do and then they do it and
they fall and they get hurt,they break an ankle or something
happens, and as a parent, yourfirst reaction is not to scold
(10:43):
them but to pick them up andhold them and make sure that
they are okay.
It is our first instinct whenwe see our child suffering and
sort of some sort of pain.
And it reminds me because afteryou go through a traumatic
event, the first thing is not totry and find a strategy that's
(11:04):
going to help you work throughyour financial situation.
The first thing is you need tomake sure that you are okay or
your family members are okay,and so dealing with that first,
I think, is most importantbefore tackling anything that
comes with your finances,because if you're not okay, then
(11:25):
you can't help yourself orothers.
So that I just wanted to addthat in there because it's very
important.
Okay, so let's get into some ofthe financial strategies that
are important after you'recoming out of a traumatic event.
So protection that is animportant word to remember.
Protection you want to protectyourself in the event something
(11:47):
else would happen.
So this is where the emergencyfunds come into play.
So emergency funds, havinginsurance you want these
resources available so that ifan event, something were to
happen, you have somewhere to goto access some resource to help
you in the times of thetraumatic event.
(12:08):
So building that emergency fundor getting insurance is
probably, I would say, thenumber one thing you should do
or look into after having atraumatic event.
This is just so you can startright away and putting money
aside for anything that couldpossibly go wrong in the future.
You really want to stabilizeyour finances in this very early
(12:32):
stages of recovery and soputting that in place and it
doesn't have to be a largeamount People get kind of, you
know, almost freaked out by thenumbers, and it really doesn't
have to be that way Just take asmall amount and contribute that
towards your emergency fund,any insurance that you may need
that you don't have, and juststart somewhere, because it's
(12:55):
very important to stabilize yourfinances in these very early
stages of recovery.
Now the next thing to look intois your budget and some
financial planning.
Now, I know when you're comingout of a traumatic event, the
last thing you want to do is tothink about a budget, but your
financial situation has likelychanged.
(13:16):
You know you may have lost apartner, you may have lost your
home, like whatever it is.
Your financial situation haschanged and so you can't keep
doing the same things you weredoing before.
So this is why you need to takean assessment of what your new
expenses are, how much money andincome you have coming in and
(13:38):
really sit down and create abudget.
If you're anything like I was,staying on top of your budget is
not an easy task.
Paycheck to paycheck would goby and you're no further ahead.
For my listeners, I am givingyou this free guide that is
going to take you to the nextlevel.
It's got 10 easy tips to followto help you stay on track with
(14:02):
your budget.
Just head tothefinancialmomentcom
backslashbudget-tips, enter yourinformation and you can
download this guide right now.
Now I'll know a lot of peopledon't know how to do this.
If you need help with that,feel free to reach out, because
(14:23):
there's all types of budgetsright, we don't have just one
budget for everyone.
There's budgets for people thatlove tracking.
There's budgets for people like, or more of, a free spender.
There's budgets for people thatjust wanna get an idea of where
to put their money, like.
There are budgets for everypersonality type.
I can guarantee you that.
So you want one that is gonnabe catered to you, that is now
(14:48):
reflecting your new income oryour new situation, and it's
going to help you to put andsave money for emergencies and
things like that, and it's goingto help you to maybe create
some short term or even longterm financial goals.
Now, I know the goal setting isnot important at this point
because you're in, again, earlystages of recovery, but it's
(15:10):
going to set the stage right.
It's gonna set the stage sothat eventually, you can start
to put those goals into placeand rebuild your financial
situation.
Okay, and the next strategy istalking about rebuilding your
credit.
Now, how many of you listened tothe episode from last week?
If you haven't, you need to goback and listen to that one.
(15:32):
We talked all about creditscores and what's involved, why
they affect us and what they'reused for.
So it was a really greatconversation I had with Siobhan,
the mortgage broker.
Now, trauma has a really bigimpact on credit scores, and
I'll give you an example of this.
(15:52):
I was talking to someone andthey were talking about how they
are self-employed and so theywork with a lot of clients and
they do some client work andthen you know they get paid for
their services.
Now, in this particularsituation, it was a very big
project and I know there wasinvoicing that was happening
beginning, middle and the end ofthis project, and the client
(16:15):
just kept saying oh you know,don't worry, I'm gonna find, but
we're gonna cover it, don'tworry.
Well, it got towards the end ofthe project and the person did
not get paid for their services.
Now we're talking, you know,almost thousands, tens of
thousands of dollars lost ofincome.
And during the time period whenthey were working on this
(16:36):
project, they were heavily usingtheir credit cards to get
through right, because they knewthat the paycheck was coming.
They knew that the money wascoming, and so they thought oh
well, it's, you know, I have,you know, 21 days to pay off the
credit card, and so it'll befine.
Well, the payday never came,and so the credit cards just
(16:57):
kept getting racked up and upand up, and if you're not able
to pay those payments in full atthe end of the month when they
say it's due, it has a reallynegative impact on your scores,
and that can be through latepayments, it can be through
utilization of the credit cards,it can be through how many
(17:17):
credit cards you have.
There's so many ways where yourcredit score is being affected
if you're using credit to dealwith a situation right, and so
rebuilding that credit andseeking help when you need it is
very important.
So if you have debt in the nextcouple of weeks we're gonna do
(17:39):
a lot of episodes about how todeal with debt, really trying to
tackle it and making someimprovements in your life,
because debt has such a bigimpact on our mental health.
You know the way we treat ourfamilies, the way we treat
others, because it's such aheavy burden, and so I think
it's really important to dealwith that debt.
(17:59):
And it doesn't mean that you'regoing to pay it off tomorrow,
but it just means that you havea strategy that you can follow
to get to your end goal ofrepayment.
So, again, rebuilding credit isreally important after trauma
has happened.
So the next thing to look at isreally your income level.
Is it enough to cover yourcurrent expenses as it is right
(18:23):
now?
Coming out of trauma situation?
Perhaps may need to generate alittle more income during this
recovery time.
So that would mean doing somefreelancing or picking up some
part-time work or, you know,even a side gig, right.
So I've worked a very long timein healthcare as a finance
(18:43):
manager, so I have seenfirsthand these nurses who, you
know, they pick up a doubleshift or they add, you know,
some extra OT on there just sothat they can make a little bit
extra money for their families,and you know that's great.
You know I applaud them.
But I think it comes to a pointwhen your time sometimes is
(19:05):
more valuable.
But coming out of a traumaticsituation, this is a great way
to just kind of slightly boostyour income to help you out of a
tough situation.
Okay, so that would take us tothe first phase.
Right, those are yourfundamentals that you need to
kind of focus on coming out of atraumatic situation.
(19:25):
But then there is a phase two.
So the things are, you know,going smoothly.
Now you have a budget in place,you know you're making a little
bit more income if you need to,you're starting to rebuild your
credit and now it's time to doa little bit of planning.
But before that, before youstart to plan for the future,
(19:47):
what is so important is to builda support system, and support
can come and show up in so manydifferent types of ways, right,
whether it comes from family,whether it comes from your
friends, and it can definitelycome from, you know, therapy and
counseling and a supportnetwork or coaching.
Right, it can't come from somany different places, but it's
(20:10):
important to develop thatbecause you can't just go it
alone, right.
These traumatic events aresevere and sometimes, like I
said, not caused by you, and soyou need someone that you can
rely on and talk to and sharewith about how it's impacting
you, how the stress of the newfinancial situation is playing a
(20:32):
toll on you.
So I really wanted to dive intothis a little bit more, because
sometimes we really don't seekout the help we need, especially
when it comes to our financialsituation.
So here's just a couple of waysor things that you can do to
create a support network.
So first off is choose theright time and place.
So you want to have a specificdesignated time and space to
(20:55):
really talk to someone aboutyour financial concerns right.
You don't want to have anydistractions or a time
constraint.
You want it to be a time whenyou really can have an open
communication with that person.
The next thing you just reallywant to be honest and
transparent.
Right, people are willing tolisten.
(21:16):
They will help you withspecific challenges that you're
facing and maybe even give yousome suggestions on how you can
overcome that financialcircumstance.
Right, but you need to comeforth and be honest and
transparent and express yourfeelings.
Talk about how your financialsituation, how you got there,
(21:37):
what you're trying to do toimprove it, any of the stress
that it may be causing you.
Just talking and expressingyour feelings sometimes it
really can help to reduceanxiety and reduce the fear and
concern that you have for thefuture.
And you know what.
Be clear and articulate what itis that you need from them,
(22:01):
right?
Sometimes it's just aboutlistening, it's just about the
emotional support you know what,and sometimes it really is
about financial assistance andperhaps that person maybe can
assist or lead you to where youcan find some financial
assistance.
Just be clear, articulate whatit is that you need, because
people really appreciate thehonesty.
(22:22):
Then also give that person theopportunity to respond and share
their perspective.
So you know what that means.
That means you need to listenand listen actively and
empathetically to their thoughtsand concerns.
This way you can kind of takeit in, take the time to listen
so you can take into what it isthat they're saying and maybe it
(22:45):
will apply to you and maybe itwon't, but at least you would
have heard it and Maybe it'llgive you a little bit of a
different perspective and thenset some realistic expectations
what is achievable in a certainperiod of time.
I always talk about achievablegoals, right.
So sometimes this person can bejust a confidant and they just
(23:07):
want to listen and help youthrough a situation.
But maybe, if it's like someonethat's more of a professional,
like a therapist or a coach,maybe there's something that you
can actually work through andmake something that is
achievable.
Like how good does it feel ifyou set some realistic and
achievable goals and then youwork through it and you get
there, just like my closet rightSet some realistic expectations
(23:30):
, get the work done and you feelso much better at the end of it
when you've accomplished yourgoal.
So I can't stress enough howimportant collaboration is on
finding solutions, developingstrategies to address your
financial challenges that you'rehaving.
Open and honest communicationis really truly essential for
(23:51):
building understanding andsupport from your loved ones or
from professionals right, it's atwo-way process, so you both
want to be prepared to sharewhat your needs are and to
listen to their concerns andsuggestions as well.
So I only hope that thesestrategies kind of resonated
with you.
Some of the things that wetalked about are the
(24:12):
fundamentals of financialwellness, so that would be
things like setting up theemergency fund, developing and
understanding how to budget andplan financially, rebuilding
your credit and managing yourdebt and then even income
generation.
Those are all the fundamentalsof financial wellness.
(24:32):
But that bonus and the thingthat's going to really take you
to the next level and get youout of the situation is the
support system.
So I highly recommend that youcreate that and take action when
you need it, seek out thosenecessary resources and support,
and remember I'm always here tobe a guide for you, especially
(24:55):
when you're coming out of afinancial nightmare.
I hope to help with strategyand get you on the right track
and provide you with that liftof the burden of the weight that
comes from not knowing what todo next.
All right, I hope you guysenjoyed this episode and we will
(25:17):
see you in the next one.
Take care.
Thank you for listening.
We are committed to helping youplace your very first steps
into your new home.
See you next time.
Hello everyone.
My name is Carolyn.
Welcome to the Saving for yourFirst Home podcast.
I am the CEO of the FinancialMoment.
We offer money coaching forthose who are ready and willing
to make financial changes intheir lives.
For the most of us, there comesa point in time where we think
to ourselves it would be reallynice to own property, but it
(00:22):
sometimes can feel like a pipedream and not very easily
obtainable.
So I created this podcast togive you all the information and
tools you need to take thesteps forward toward home
ownership.
Take it from me my husband andI started our lives together,
working part-time jobs with ayoung child.
Fast forward, through manyhiccups and failures, we stepped
(00:43):
our feet into our very firsthome.
For us it was a pile of dirt,but eventually our family home
was built on that dirt.
Now we are in the midst ofgrowing our investment property
portfolio.
I created the savings for yourfirst home podcast to give you
easy, actionable tools for youto do the same.
If you have that same gutfeeling that I did and want to
(01:06):
create a life for yourself andyour growing family, but don't
know where to start, you are inthe right place.
Let's do this.
Hello everyone and welcome backto the Saving for your First
Home podcast.
I'm Carolyn, your money coach.
So how are you guys doing?
I'm finding myself kind of in acleanup mode, you know, trying
(01:27):
to get rid of some of the oldstuff, things that you don't use
anymore, don't you find?
When you clear out things andyou have all this additional
space, you kind of wonderyourself why did you hang on to
it for so long?
Right, and I had to give myselfsome grace, because, although I
know my whole house needs a bigoverhaul and for me to go
(01:48):
through every closet and everydrawer, I just couldn't manage
all that in a weekend.
And so what I did and I said tomyself was you know what, let's
just pick one thing.
If I can accomplish one thing,I'm going to feel so much better
and it's going to be like astepping stone towards finishing
up the entire space.
So that's what I did.
(02:09):
I just opened up my closet thiscloset is the one where all
your jackets and shoes and allthis stuff ends up and I took
everything out, you know, and Isorted it in piles and, one by
one, we went through each thingand decided do we want to keep
it or do we want to get rid ofit?
Afterwards we had a pile ofwhat we were going to donate and
(02:33):
what we're going to sell andyou know, and we look at the
closet and it is so freeingknowing that there's all this
space.
And you know, we're alwaysfighting for hangers and like
there's a ton of hangers now andit was just really refreshing
we were able to close the doorwithout problem.
Anyway, just having said all ofthat, it just kind of reminded
(02:56):
me that when we have big,overwhelming things or tasks
that we need to do, it'simportant just to take a step
back and say you know what I cando one thing and I can do one
thing well, and focus on thatand see what you can accomplish.
This is kind of what's leadingme into today's topic, and it's
(03:18):
a difficult one, to be honestwith you, because you know I've
heard from several people thattheir financial problems are not
problems that they kind ofbrought on themselves.
It's due to a traumatic event.
Now, this can come in so manydifferent forms.
Right, we can have a medicalemergency, where that causes us
(03:42):
to have substantial medicalbills or lost income.
It could be a natural disasterlike a hurricane or a flood or
an earthquake or wildfire.
You know we've having so manyof these things lately and these
are not things that you cancontrol, right?
I think I said on my podcast Ihad booked a trip to Hawaii and
(04:05):
just before we were about toleave, a few weeks before, there
was that major wildfire thathappened and I feel for those
people I mean, majority of thatarea that was destroyed was
historical places, people thathave lived and had generations
grow up in that neighborhood andso I really feel for the areas
(04:26):
that have been hit by hurricanesand floods and earthquakes and
wildfires because you know theyare the ones that have to pick
up after severe devastation totheir home and belongings, and a
lot of these places don't evenprovide for adequate insurance
coverage.
So you know it really issomething that it's hard to kind
(04:50):
of bounce back from, but it's.
Having said that, there areother things that you know that
also are traumatic events in ourlives, for example, a job loss
or unemployment.
Sometimes these kind of thingshappen suddenly.
You don't even realize.
Like you know, the company islaying off like 300 people and
you just happen to be one ofthem and you know you were just
(05:11):
going into work that day and allof a sudden now your life has
been thrown upside down and youknow you have no income coming
in.
How do you cover your dailyexpenses?
Your obligations, mortgage,rent, all these different things
like flood your mind and youhave to adjust and it's very,
very difficult.
You know I personally have gonethrough this before where you
(05:35):
know we've had a sudden job lossin our family and it really
takes a toll, not onlyfinancially, but your mental
health really is affected bysomething like this.
It not only does it impact you,it impacts the people around
you.
Another thing where it involvesyour family is a divorce or a
(05:57):
separation or even a death inthe family.
Like.
There are so many costs thatare associated with these types
of events, like legal costs,court costs, child support that
now needs to be paid Someonethat is now coming from a double
income dropping down to asingle income family.
It's very hard to kind ofadjust when you're so used to
(06:21):
being in a certain way andtaking care of in a certain way
that to have to go through allof that and clear all of those
costs and expenses, bring on newexpenses and then try to figure
it all out with one income isvery difficult and can lead to a
lot of financial strain.
And I mentioned the death of afamily member, right, if we're
(06:43):
not prepared for these thingsfuneral expenses, settling in a
state, you know, even the lossof that particular family
member's income can createfinancial hardship.
These type of things have avery big impact on the family
financially, but also as afamily unit just adjusting to
(07:03):
all the change.
And so you know, having somestrategies and ways to cope with
this is very important.
Let's talk about theft.
You know theft can come in theform of identity theft that's
what we're seeing more and moreof now which can lead to
financial fraud and authorizedcharges and then legal expenses
(07:24):
that try and resolve that typeof issue.
I mean, I know that each one ofyou that are listening to this
podcast have experienced a scamcall or someone that has kind of
reached out in a very, you know, sneaky way and kind of gotten
information from you.
People have had their accountslocked, money taken, like it is
(07:47):
just right now.
Identity theft is very, veryrampant and you have to be so
careful with your information,and we're also having a lot of
property damage in theft.
A lot of vehicles are beingstolen.
When we go out of a pandemic andwe're going into sort of what
we call a recession, it's verydifficult for people and we're
(08:08):
going to see that crime is kindof escalating.
So burglaries, vandalism,property damage that you may
have to incur and having toreplace it, dealing with the
hassle of the insurance,everything these events are just
so prevalent now and then, as Ithink about it even more, I
(08:31):
think about people that strugglewith substance abuse and
addictions, the mental healthissues and the family kind of
going through this.
You know they have to deal withmaybe some legal problems that
result from this, or medicalproblems and added debt, to be
honest with you, and all of thiscan lead to an ability to work
(08:53):
and have substantial medicalexpenses for therapy and other
things that they need to helpthem cope through these certain
challenges.
Now, I am not a counselor or atherapist or anything like that.
All I do know is that, comingout of situations like this,
after the dust has settled, onceyou have kind of understood
(09:17):
what the problem was, you'regetting help, you're dealt with
all the legal implications andthen you're left with the
financial burden that any one ofthese problems can bring.
What do you do now?
And I thought I'd talk a littlebit about how to cope when
you're trying to get back onyour feet, and it just leaves me
(09:39):
back to my original littlestory that I had over the
weekend, which is just tackleone thing at a time.
So I'm going to go through somestrategies that I hope that you
put it in your back pocket,because I'm hoping that for all
of you you don't experience anyof these things.
But you know, maybe that timemay come where you need some
(10:01):
kind of strategy to get throughand back on your feet again.
So let's talk about somestrategies that can provide some
guidance and support for anyonewho has faced a difficult
circumstance.
So if any of you have children,you'll understand the feeling
that I'm about to describe.
(10:21):
So your child has donesomething, whether they were
running or jumping or you knowsomething that you probably have
told them a million times notto do and then they do it and
they fall and they get hurt,they break an ankle or something
happens, and as a parent, yourfirst reaction is not to scold
(10:43):
them but to pick them up andhold them and make sure that
they are okay.
It is our first instinct whenwe see our child suffering and
sort of some sort of pain.
And it reminds me because afteryou go through a traumatic
event, the first thing is not totry and find a strategy that's
(11:04):
going to help you work throughyour financial situation.
The first thing is you need tomake sure that you are okay or
your family members are okay,and so dealing with that first,
I think, is most importantbefore tackling anything that
comes with your finances,because if you're not okay, then
(11:25):
you can't help yourself orothers.
So that I just wanted to addthat in there because it's very
important.
Okay, so let's get into some ofthe financial strategies that
are important after you'recoming out of a traumatic event.
So protection that is animportant word to remember.
Protection you want to protectyourself in the event something
(11:47):
else would happen.
So this is where the emergencyfunds come into play.
So emergency funds, havinginsurance you want these
resources available so that ifan event, something were to
happen, you have somewhere to goto access some resource to help
you in the times of thetraumatic event.
(12:08):
So building that emergency fundor getting insurance is
probably, I would say, thenumber one thing you should do
or look into after having atraumatic event.
This is just so you can startright away and putting money
aside for anything that couldpossibly go wrong in the future.
You really want to stabilizeyour finances in this very early
(12:32):
stages of recovery and soputting that in place and it
doesn't have to be a largeamount People get kind of, you
know, almost freaked out by thenumbers, and it really doesn't
have to be that way Just take asmall amount and contribute that
towards your emergency fund,any insurance that you may need
that you don't have, and juststart somewhere, because it's
(12:55):
very important to stabilize yourfinances in these very early
stages of recovery.
Now the next thing to look intois your budget and some
financial planning.
Now, I know when you're comingout of a traumatic event, the
last thing you want to do is tothink about a budget, but your
financial situation has likelychanged.
(13:16):
You know you may have lost apartner, you may have lost your
home, like whatever it is.
Your financial situation haschanged and so you can't keep
doing the same things you weredoing before.
So this is why you need to takean assessment of what your new
expenses are, how much money andincome you have coming in and
(13:38):
really sit down and create abudget.
If you're anything like I was,staying on top of your budget is
not an easy task.
Paycheck to paycheck would goby and you're no further ahead.
For my listeners, I am givingyou this free guide that is
going to take you to the nextlevel.
It's got 10 easy tips to followto help you stay on track with
(14:02):
your budget.
Just head tothefinancialmomentcom
backslashbudget-tips, enter yourinformation and you can
download this guide right now.
Now I'll know a lot of peopledon't know how to do this.
If you need help with that,feel free to reach out, because
(14:23):
there's all types of budgetsright, we don't have just one
budget for everyone.
There's budgets for people thatlove tracking.
There's budgets for people like, or more of, a free spender.
There's budgets for people thatjust wanna get an idea of where
to put their money, like.
There are budgets for everypersonality type.
I can guarantee you that.
So you want one that is gonnabe catered to you, that is now
(14:48):
reflecting your new income oryour new situation, and it's
going to help you to put andsave money for emergencies and
things like that, and it's goingto help you to maybe create
some short term or even longterm financial goals.
Now, I know the goal setting isnot important at this point
because you're in, again, earlystages of recovery, but it's
(15:10):
going to set the stage right.
It's gonna set the stage sothat eventually, you can start
to put those goals into placeand rebuild your financial
situation.
Okay, and the next strategy istalking about rebuilding your
credit.
Now, how many of you listened tothe episode from last week?
If you haven't, you need to goback and listen to that one.
(15:32):
We talked all about creditscores and what's involved, why
they affect us and what they'reused for.
So it was a really greatconversation I had with Siobhan,
the mortgage broker.
Now, trauma has a really bigimpact on credit scores, and
I'll give you an example of this.
(15:52):
I was talking to someone andthey were talking about how they
are self-employed and so theywork with a lot of clients and
they do some client work andthen you know they get paid for
their services.
Now, in this particularsituation, it was a very big
project and I know there wasinvoicing that was happening
beginning, middle and the end ofthis project, and the client
(16:15):
just kept saying oh you know,don't worry, I'm gonna find, but
we're gonna cover it, don'tworry.
Well, it got towards the end ofthe project and the person did
not get paid for their services.
Now we're talking, you know,almost thousands, tens of
thousands of dollars lost ofincome.
And during the time period whenthey were working on this
(16:36):
project, they were heavily usingtheir credit cards to get
through right, because they knewthat the paycheck was coming.
They knew that the money wascoming, and so they thought oh
well, it's, you know, I have,you know, 21 days to pay off the
credit card, and so it'll befine.
Well, the payday never came,and so the credit cards just
(16:57):
kept getting racked up and upand up, and if you're not able
to pay those payments in full atthe end of the month when they
say it's due, it has a reallynegative impact on your scores,
and that can be through latepayments, it can be through
utilization of the credit cards,it can be through how many
(17:17):
credit cards you have.
There's so many ways where yourcredit score is being affected
if you're using credit to dealwith a situation right, and so
rebuilding that credit andseeking help when you need it is
very important.
So if you have debt in the nextcouple of weeks we're gonna do
(17:39):
a lot of episodes about how todeal with debt, really trying to
tackle it and making someimprovements in your life,
because debt has such a bigimpact on our mental health.
You know the way we treat ourfamilies, the way we treat
others, because it's such aheavy burden, and so I think
it's really important to dealwith that debt.
(17:59):
And it doesn't mean that you'regoing to pay it off tomorrow,
but it just means that you havea strategy that you can follow
to get to your end goal ofrepayment.
So, again, rebuilding credit isreally important after trauma
has happened.
So the next thing to look at isreally your income level.
Is it enough to cover yourcurrent expenses as it is right
(18:23):
now?
Coming out of trauma situation?
Perhaps may need to generate alittle more income during this
recovery time.
So that would mean doing somefreelancing or picking up some
part-time work or, you know,even a side gig, right.
So I've worked a very long timein healthcare as a finance
(18:43):
manager, so I have seenfirsthand these nurses who, you
know, they pick up a doubleshift or they add, you know,
some extra OT on there just sothat they can make a little bit
extra money for their families,and you know that's great.
You know I applaud them.
But I think it comes to a pointwhen your time sometimes is
(19:05):
more valuable.
But coming out of a traumaticsituation, this is a great way
to just kind of slightly boostyour income to help you out of a
tough situation.
Okay, so that would take us tothe first phase.
Right, those are yourfundamentals that you need to
kind of focus on coming out of atraumatic situation.
(19:25):
But then there is a phase two.
So the things are, you know,going smoothly.
Now you have a budget in place,you know you're making a little
bit more income if you need to,you're starting to rebuild your
credit and now it's time to doa little bit of planning.
But before that, before youstart to plan for the future,
(19:47):
what is so important is to builda support system, and support
can come and show up in so manydifferent types of ways, right,
whether it comes from family,whether it comes from your
friends, and it can definitelycome from, you know, therapy and
counseling and a supportnetwork or coaching.
Right, it can't come from somany different places, but it's
(20:10):
important to develop thatbecause you can't just go it
alone, right.
These traumatic events aresevere and sometimes, like I
said, not caused by you, and soyou need someone that you can
rely on and talk to and sharewith about how it's impacting
you, how the stress of the newfinancial situation is playing a
(20:32):
toll on you.
So I really wanted to dive intothis a little bit more, because
sometimes we really don't seekout the help we need, especially
when it comes to our financialsituation.
So here's just a couple of waysor things that you can do to
create a support network.
So first off is choose theright time and place.
So you want to have a specificdesignated time and space to
(20:55):
really talk to someone aboutyour financial concerns right.
You don't want to have anydistractions or a time
constraint.
You want it to be a time whenyou really can have an open
communication with that person.
The next thing you just reallywant to be honest and
transparent.
Right, people are willing tolisten.
(21:16):
They will help you withspecific challenges that you're
facing and maybe even give yousome suggestions on how you can
overcome that financialcircumstance.
Right, but you need to comeforth and be honest and
transparent and express yourfeelings.
Talk about how your financialsituation, how you got there,
(21:37):
what you're trying to do toimprove it, any of the stress
that it may be causing you.
Just talking and expressingyour feelings sometimes it
really can help to reduceanxiety and reduce the fear and
concern that you have for thefuture.
And you know what.
Be clear and articulate what itis that you need from them,
(22:01):
right?
Sometimes it's just aboutlistening, it's just about the
emotional support you know what,and sometimes it really is
about financial assistance andperhaps that person maybe can
assist or lead you to where youcan find some financial
assistance.
Just be clear, articulate whatit is that you need, because
people really appreciate thehonesty.
(22:22):
Then also give that person theopportunity to respond and share
their perspective.
So you know what that means.
That means you need to listenand listen actively and
empathetically to their thoughtsand concerns.
This way you can kind of takeit in, take the time to listen
so you can take into what it isthat they're saying and maybe it
(22:45):
will apply to you and maybe itwon't, but at least you would
have heard it and Maybe it'llgive you a little bit of a
different perspective and thenset some realistic expectations
what is achievable in a certainperiod of time.
I always talk about achievablegoals, right.
So sometimes this person can bejust a confidant and they just
(23:07):
want to listen and help youthrough a situation.
But maybe, if it's like someonethat's more of a professional,
like a therapist or a coach,maybe there's something that you
can actually work through andmake something that is
achievable.
Like how good does it feel ifyou set some realistic and
achievable goals and then youwork through it and you get
there, just like my closet rightSet some realistic expectations
(23:30):
, get the work done and you feelso much better at the end of it
when you've accomplished yourgoal.
So I can't stress enough howimportant collaboration is on
finding solutions, developingstrategies to address your
financial challenges that you'rehaving.
Open and honest communicationis really truly essential for
(23:51):
building understanding andsupport from your loved ones or
from professionals right, it's atwo-way process, so you both
want to be prepared to sharewhat your needs are and to
listen to their concerns andsuggestions as well.
So I only hope that thesestrategies kind of resonated
with you.
Some of the things that wetalked about are the
(24:12):
fundamentals of financialwellness, so that would be
things like setting up theemergency fund, developing and
understanding how to budget andplan financially, rebuilding
your credit and managing yourdebt and then even income
generation.
Those are all the fundamentalsof financial wellness.
(24:32):
But that bonus and the thingthat's going to really take you
to the next level and get youout of the situation is the
support system.
So I highly recommend that youcreate that and take action when
you need it, seek out thosenecessary resources and support,
and remember I'm always here tobe a guide for you, especially
(24:55):
when you're coming out of afinancial nightmare.
I hope to help with strategyand get you on the right track
and provide you with that liftof the burden of the weight that
comes from not knowing what todo next.
All right, I hope you guysenjoyed this episode and we will
(25:17):
see you in the next one.
Take care.
Thank you for listening.
We are committed to helping youplace your very first steps
into your new home.
See you next time.
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