September 28, 2023 • 47 mins
In this episode, we delve into the remarkable journey of Yarelbys Túa Pachano, a Venezuelan model and influencer who is defying expectations and advocating for inclusivity. Yare’s story is not only about overcoming cancer and disability but also about the power of communication and kindness in her interactions.
We'll explore how Yare discusses her disability with strangers, shedding light on the misconceptions and taboos surrounding disabilities in her home country and beyond. She shares her experiences of responding to well-intentioned but offbeat questions and comments and addresses the common misunderstanding that being disabled prompts pity.
Moreover, Yarelbys reveals her approach to communicating effectively within her close circle—her partner and friends—especially when it comes to traveling and attending concerts and music festivals. Her story demonstrates that communication can bridge gaps, challenge stereotypes, and foster a more inclusive world.
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Hosted by Lainie Ishbia and Estela Lugo.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to the Embrace it series, where women
with all types of disabilitiescan be real, resourceful and
stylish.
With each episode, you'll walkor roll away with everyday tips,
life hacks and success storiesfrom community leaders and
influencers.
So take off your leg braces andstay a while with Lainey and
Estella.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Hi, I'm Lainey and I have CMT.
I'm a neuro-muscular disorderaffecting approximately 2.6
million people worldwide.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
That's as many as MS.
We believe disabilities shouldnever get in the way of looking
or feeling good.
Both of us wear leg braces andhave learned through our own
personal journeys to embrace itBrought to you by Launchpad 516
Studios.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
each episode is designed to challenge your own
stigmas and beliefs arounddisability.
We want our listeners to getthe most value for their time
spent with us, so we interviewsome of the most empowering
disability badasses in the world.
Through storytelling, personalexperiences and tips, we're all
reminded of our own strengthsand endless potential.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
For more information and exclusive resources, check
out our websites attrend-ablecom and hnf-curorg,
and don't forget to hit thesubscribe button for future
episodes and special promos.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Hey everyone, welcome to another episode of the
Embracing Podcast with Laineyand Estella.
Hi everyone, it is the end ofsummer here, it's coming to a
close, but we have a fun guestwho will bring the heat from
Florida.
Her name is Yadet Dua.
She is a disability andinclusion advocate, she is a
(01:52):
content creator, she is a model,she's a badass, and we've been
following her for a while andwe're so excited to speak with
you today, yadet, welcome.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for having meand for that amazing
introduction.
I'm really, really excited tocome out here and share a little
bit of my story and myexperience with everyone that's
listening.
So thank you so much for thisopportunity.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Yadet Estella sent me your little TED talk and I love
the title especially, which waswhy I should be the next sports
illustrated model in 2023.
So to kick us off, you, know, Ithink you should, and maybe
(02:37):
everyone else is going to put intheir vote as well.
Can you start telling us aboutyourself how you acquired, if
you acquired, a disability?
You know how you entered thedisability community and kind of
just a little synopsis of whoyou are, what you do and where
you came from.
Speaker 4 (02:55):
Yeah, so I started advocating like kind of like my
career.
I started two years ago well,three years ago now during the
pandemic and you know, when Ibecame disabled.
I became disabled when I was 15.
I went through cancer and,after receiving treatment for
chemotherapy and radiation, Ideveloped like a spinal cord
(03:17):
injury and that caused mydisability when I was 15.
So at that time and at that age, I really didn't see any
representation out there and Igrew up in Venezuela.
I moved to the US when I was 18years old.
So, especially in Latin America, I didn't see anyone on the
media, anyone not even around methat had a disability and that
(03:40):
lived a happy life with adisability.
So it was very difficult atthat time for me to understand
what was happening and how I wasgoing to become an adult and do
all the things that I alwaysthought I was doing and do all
the dreams that I had.
So about two years ago, when Iwas younger, before my
disability, I always wanted tobe a model.
(04:00):
I always wanted to be in theentertainment industry.
I was in every activity.
I danced and like a lot ofperformances during my life.
So back in 2020, I was just likethinking about what I wanted to
do with my life, and obviouslyI had a lot of free time during
the pandemic to think about whatI wanted to do, just because I
got furlough from my job andkind of like the career path
(04:22):
that I wasn't.
It was one that was excited andI liked it, but I didn't feel
that that was what I was meantto do.
Like that didn't necessarilyfit as an answer of the things
that made me passionate and thethings that I wanted to do.
So about that time is when Istarted kind of like doing the
easiest thing I could do, whichwas like taking photos and
(04:45):
putting them on the internet andlike making reels, and started
to like just put myself outthere and through putting myself
out there, I found like manyconnections and I found an
agency for modeling and then Igained like community of
followers and that's kind oflike how I started advocating
and I obviously started learningmore about disability and what
(05:06):
I can do and how I can makethings better, and it's just
been a constant, constantlearning from my community.
I feel like we give each other,you know so much wisdom and we
learn from each otherexperiences, so it's been
amazing.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
We love seeing all of the fun traveling, especially
that you do online.
But before we get into that, Idon't want to, you know,
underestimate the journey thatit took for you to go from a
fully abled teenager to having adisability after.
(05:41):
Take us more through that.
What was that emotionaltransition and journey for you?
Because I think a lot of peopledon't necessarily associate
cancer with a risk of gettinghaving a disability, and I know
through chemo induced neuropathywhether that's the cause, or
(06:03):
you know something that wasaffected with a surgery that was
this cancer related.
Can you tell us a little bitmore about what that journey is,
because I think there's a lot?
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I think that, like the spinal cord part, you know,
because, for those who arelistening, and I'm sure you know
those of you who've heard thisa million times Estella and I
both have churros disease andone of the like drugs that I see
on the do not take ever, likethere's all these.
You know this could make itworse, this could make your
disease worse, but like the onethat people say, oh, this really
(06:33):
does make everything worse.
If you have CMT is achemotherapy related drugs,
which Estella alluded to, but aspinal cord disability, like how
does that happen?
Speaker 4 (06:45):
Yeah, so to take you a little bit back through that
emotional roller coaster that itwas when I first got cancer.
I feel like I was still tooyoung to understand all of the
complication and what it meant.
Up until that time in my life Iknew cancer could be deadly,
but I really had not experiencedcancer in my family or anyone
(07:06):
around me.
And it's really crazy to thinkthat your friends going to get
cancer or your parents are goingto get cancer, but even crazier
to think that you're the onethat's going to get it.
So obviously that thought nevereven crossed my mind until
until up until the point thatthe news were delivered to me,
because up until then I had gonethrough surgery and something
was going on and they talkedabout treatment but nowhere, no
(07:27):
one ever mentioned the wordcancer.
So then, up until that day, Iwalked into the doctor office
and I see that is a chemotreatment center.
I obviously understood and satdown to the doctor and asked
about everything that was goingto happen, how long the
treatment was going to be andwhat I could expect.
So Nine, the doctor did not goeasy on that.
(07:50):
Obviously he gave the worstcase scenario just to prepare me
.
It was going to be a year-longexperience to go through about
12 cycles of chemotherapy every21 days and then after that we
had 20 discussions of radiation.
In between that year we had onesurgery plan.
I already went through onesurgery.
(08:11):
This was going to be the secondsurgery.
I had cancer on my ribs on theleft side of my back.
It's basically a cancer that isosteosarcoma.
It's very common on childrenand teenagers because it grows
on the bones.
Usually the grow happens onthis year, when you're a kid and
(08:33):
you're growing, and then thecells go crazy and build a tumor
and it's from the bone.
Mine was specifically on myribs.
Throughout all of this time Ihad to go through the treatments
and I saw this plan that we hadwith the doctor and everyone as
a personal goal that I wasgoing to finish.
(08:55):
There were not going to becomplications.
Obviously, in my mind therewere plenty of complications,
but I saw it as an end goal andI was like this is how many days
I have until the end oftreatment and I try to do my
best during that time.
I still try to live life, Istill try to go out, and it was
difficult because there weresome things I was able to do
with others.
(09:15):
I just couldn't.
I had to stay home.
I couldn't go out, I would betoo exposed.
But after that, and thinkingthat it was over and that I was
going to go back to normal,finding out that I was
developing a disability was likeI started losing balance.
I started having losingsensation on my feet and just
(09:39):
losing strength in general.
During a trip, I was on a tripand I was just feeling all the
symptoms, had no clue what wasgoing on.
This was also like three monthsafter finishing my treatment,
which was the last treatment Idid was radiation.
So three months after is when Istarted feeling the symptoms,
Going back to the doctor tryingto figure out what was going on.
It was an emotional rollercoaster because a lot of people
(10:01):
didn't have answers.
It was so difficult to go to adoctor and they are like we
don't know what caused it.
This could have been, thiscould have been, this could have
been and we don't know how tostop it and what we can
recommend is that you dophysical therapy, but after
having a diagnosis of cancer,knowing exactly what I could do
to fix it and coming to adisability diagnosis and the
(10:26):
situation that I was in,basically, and not having an
answer to what can I take tomake this stop, what can I do to
make it better, and still notknowing if it was going to be
permanent.
A lot of doctors were like itmight be permanent, it might not
be permanent.
So I obviously had many, manyquestions and I was very upset
about the fact that I couldn'tunderstand why I was going
(10:47):
through something so difficultafter winning After just winning
this battle against cancer.
I was so lost on understandingwhy this was happening and
obviously at that point Ithought that was the worst thing
that could have happened to me.
Because I was a dancer, becauseI was active all the time and I
had no clue generally how I wasgoing to do my life, just
(11:10):
because I didn't see it anywhere.
I didn't have any role models,I had simple things.
I didn't know how I was goingto be able to drive, how I was
going to be able to date, howjust the simple things on life.
I have no clue how I was goingto do.
So obviously it was verydifficult and it took me some
time.
I will say it took me aboutprobably six months, like the
(11:30):
first three months were a lotabout finding out, like going to
doctors doing treatments or inphysical therapy.
Physical therapy was done atthe house because I was very
limited physically, I couldn'treally move a lot and I went
from having a cane to two canesto a walker and they really
didn't know where I was going tostop, like to what point I was
going to lose strength.
(11:51):
So physical therapy was at myhouse.
I didn't go to school for thatbeginning of the year and the
last three months of that periodwere pretty much adjusting to
my new life, to what I was goingto do next, and I already knew
that I had to start the schoolyear that next year.
So I was kind of preparing tookay, how am I going to do this?
We got to continue like life isgoing on, basically.
(12:15):
So, mental health wise, it wasa lot, obviously because I had
to figure that out.
But I think I got to a pointwhere I was more like well, I am
15, about to be 16, and I willnever be this age again and I
really don't know how I'm goingto figure life out.
But I'm just not going to stopbecause of this kind of like my
(12:35):
mindset.
I was like I'm still going tofind a way to have fun.
I'm still going to like go outwith my friends, live my life.
And I think on the way there,on the journey that I'm going on
, I'll probably figure it out.
And that's a big part of likemy personality.
I will say like a lot of thethings that I've done in my life
is because I've taken the riskand find out on the way, like
(12:57):
that had not paralyzed me fromlike living my life.
I remember asking for permissionto my parents, being like oh, I
want to go to this concert, andthey're like well, how are you
going to do it?
It's crowded, full of people,it's probably not accessible.
And I was like I'm not sure,but I'll.
You know, I have friends aroundme and like I was the right
people and I will figure out.
And a lot of the things that Istarted doing were on situations
(13:20):
like that Cause one thing isthat Venezuela and, you know, I
think the rest of Latin Americain general needs to be more
accessible.
So even if it's alreadydifficult here in America, I
feel like even more there.
So it was not accessible at alland I had to figure a lot of
things out.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
You know there's so many things that struck me when
you were talking and Idefinitely want to get to the
concert part.
And now, as an adult that youare, I see on your Instagram
Estella tells me how you'realways going here and there and
I know our listeners would loveto hear like about your tips and
how you do that and, as anadult, and you know, plan
(13:59):
accordingly and all that.
So we'll get to that in aminute.
But as I was looking sorry, Iwas like picturing you know your
countdown calendar to beingdone cancer treatments and
you're just like you know you'rea kid.
You're like have this calendar.
It's like school is you know?
It's like counting down to.
You know summer vacation, right,and all you hear, as I would
(14:21):
imagine as a cancer patient andpeople who are just living this
world, is I've survived cancer,I've survived, I met the one
year, I met the five year, andhere you are just like counting
down until you get to startcounting on your survival.
And then you know you get tothat end and you now have all
(14:42):
these challenges, physicalchallenges that you didn't even
have before, right?
So, like you said it, only itwas like six months and you made
it seem like that's a long time.
To me it's like wow, like areyou, like you know, stopping the
search for what can help you tofit your disabilities, your
newly acquired disabilities, andthen to acceptance.
(15:04):
Like the acceptance part, youknow, like that isn't your
personality, that's likesomething in you that is like
okay, like I, you know, this ismy reality.
Now, like talk about that for aminute, like that couldn't have
been quick, right.
Like you are like now having adisability Like when did you?
(15:25):
start saying I have a disability.
Like when was that point?
Speaker 4 (15:31):
So the first thing was that I started more going
into this mindset when I became,when I was around 17.
So, like from 15 to 16, I'mstill looking to a lot of
solutions.
My parents are looking forsolutions Everyone's.
You know I'm still doingphysical therapy but, like when
I was 17, I had already adjust alot, like I adapted my life,
(15:52):
like I was not letting mydisability stop me from the
things that I was doing.
So at that point I'm veryconfident on like doing a lot of
things.
However, I'm still very lostinto my identity and how to
address and say that I have adisability, or how.
You know, how do I explain topeople when they are like what
happened to you?
(16:12):
Or you know that I then definedmyself, took a while and I will
say it was more when I moved tothe, to the US.
So when I was more like 1920,when I started identifying more
as a disabled person and Istopped looking for more answers
and like I kind of accepted myreality and obviously it was
(16:34):
also too close, I moved from myparents.
So like I was kind of like I'mdone, like I am happy where I am
, like you guys need to stoplooking for solutions, Like I'm
okay, like you know, and it'snot like you give up and you
don't like try to get, but it'sjust accepting that this is what
happened and it's a permanentthing and of course you will do
anything to fix it, but youdon't want to live your life
(16:56):
thinking over making it allabout this one solution because,
like, that's just not how Ifound my happiness personally,
so I Will say more.
When I would turn 1920 and it Iwas a few years into my
disability I started acceptingand the more I saw people put
themselves out there online andshare their story, the more
(17:17):
Confident I gained in who I was.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Yeah, I mean it sounds like you already had a
very supportive group of friendsand family around you.
Were there any role models or,you know, examples of empowered
disabled women that youparticularly really gravitated
to and connected with?
Speaker 4 (17:37):
So someone that I saw online a long time ago.
One of the first persons that Ifound on the internet was Julia
Mercado.
She's the model.
So obviously she was one of thefirst people that I was like,
oh my god, like look at thesewomen, like, so that was one of
my first role models, both backin the day, back home I can tell
you nobody, because it's justalso a lot of the cancer
(17:59):
patients that I met and everyonedoesn't treat men with me they
didn't go through a similarsituation like this was kind of
like a new thing for my doctortoo.
So he was like what are wedoing?
Like what is happening?
Like nobody had an answer.
So I was.
I didn't have anyone for a longtime like a role model like that
.
And, yes, I had a great, greatsupport system because everyone
(18:21):
and my family and my friends,they were so willing to adapt
and so willing to.
We'll get there and we'llfigure out with you and I.
Since I was very young, I alsolearned, you know, to look for
those quality and the peoplethat I surround myself with.
So he never comes as a surpriseto me.
I'm always grateful that I havethese friends and people around
me.
But it you know, I wouldn'texpect less, I wouldn't settle
(18:44):
for less.
That I gotta say.
And I think everyone should Gointo making friends and you know
, with that mentality of theyare your true friends, they're
gonna adapt with you and they'regonna be willing to help and
understand.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
So I stopped you right there because I'm like, I
think, you know, not knowing ifour listeners have these
questions.
I have these questions.
So, like young women, right,and even with you, have great
friends that are human being,you now have a disability.
You're totally, you know,different in that you're not
able to run with them.
(19:18):
If they're, you know, wait fora contest, say, you know, let's
take the concert as an example.
Your friends knew I want to goto a concert.
It's not as simple anymore.
It's like if they're the kindof people who like to stand in
the front and, you know,whatever I don't even know what
the term is anymore, but youknow dance and like it's a very
crowded space.
I know I Personally wouldn'tput myself in that situation,
(19:42):
would be very dangerous.
I don't have great balance.
You use Building device.
I would imagine that's not yourchoice.
I don't know that.
But like your friends, as goodas they are, their lives are
being it as well.
Like they, they Did you feelguilty?
Did you feel like you wereholding people back?
How does that go on?
(20:04):
And like, how do you do aconcert?
Speaker 4 (20:06):
Yeah.
So back in the day I Felt likeI will still have some doubts
about that, like I'll still getyou know.
When it was my first time, forexample, I was like, oh my god,
I don't want to hold them back.
I don't want to.
You know, I don't want them tobe here because of me.
But one thing I learned wouldlike go into concerts and
experience, if thatcommunication is key.
(20:28):
So, like, being open with yourfriends is the best thing you
can do, like and and and havingfriends that are also willing to
ask and tell you how they feelexactly.
So, basically, what I do now isthat I'm very open.
I'm like, hey, I really don'tfeel comfortable going there,
but I'm totally fine if you do.
Like, I'll be fine for a fewminutes alone.
Like I'm, you know, and Ilearned to be flexible.
(20:50):
In that way I don't need tograb my friends with me all the
time.
Like, if I'm in an 88 section,for example, and they want to go
out there, go out there.
Sometimes I will go out therewith them, but like depends on
how I feel.
So, like I think thecommunication that you have with
your friends and and you know,it's so nice when they ask and
they're like hey, are you okay?
Are you good here?
Do you want to go?
How do you feel you know?
So, being that openrelationship with friends,
(21:13):
family, it's so importantbecause I feel like that's just
the only way you understand eachother.
I would never want my friendsto hold back because of me, but
I also would love to for them totell me what they want to do,
and if they don't want to bethere, they should be able to
tell me.
And you know, just kind of likehave that mindset of being
flexible with each other.
Everyone deserves a chance tohave fun, and if I think this is
(21:35):
comfortable and fun, I'm gonnastay here.
We'll be together for a littlebit.
Then we'll do a little bit ofwhat you want to do.
Just like any friendship ingeneral, you should be open to
listen to each other and have abalance in there.
And as far as concert back thenin Venezuela, like when I first
started going, I will alwaysstart to find a chair for a
little bit, but I still had mycrutches, so I was walking with
(21:57):
two crutches longer in the storeand then I, like the physical
therapy and gains, ran and I'mjust walking with one.
So to this day I just walk withone crotch, like one forearm
crotch, and I have a Mobilityscooter.
So, depends on where I'm going,I sometimes take my mobility
scooter with me.
(22:17):
If I know it's gonna be alittle walking in distance, I
will take my mobility scooter,just so I don't hold anyone back
because I will walk slower, butI Can, really I can walk for
long periods of time because,like I train a lot, I go to the
gym every day, like I have a lotof strength for me for standing
and walking, but I just will beslower.
So for that choice I just takemy mobility scooter and it's so
(22:39):
nice to have it because any timeyou want to sit, you sit
anything you want to stand, youthen, and a lot of the concerts
that I go to and festivals dohave a Section.
So it's so, so great that youget to, you know, have that in
close area where you can justsit and Everyone's sitting there
and you can take a break andthen maybe later you want to go
(23:00):
into the crowd, you do so, butyou can alternate.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Like that was what I wanted to know.
Like I'm picturing, I went toone concert recently Jason Maraz
and it's like old amphitheaterhere.
I'm in the trade area and youknow, as it turned out, my
husband had had spines surgeryand he's a marathon runner, so
he was actually the one who hadmore of a struggle, because it
(23:26):
was a lot of steps all the waydown and then all the way up,
and I can do steps with ahandrail without a problem, but
if there's no handrail I don'thave balance.
Okay, yes.
I'm scary at a big busy concertwhere people are kind of
blocking the handrail.
So that was my question you get, do you like you get seats that
(23:48):
are in the accessible likeaccessible seats when you go to
a Sporting event, you go to aconcert Are you getting the
accessible seats all the time?
Speaker 4 (23:57):
Not all the time, but I do look at the venue, so it
depends on what venue it is.
So if I know, like for thatexample of the handrail, or like
no handrail at all, like I tryto find seats that are on the
corner lower, or like theaccessible seats for sure, or
look at venues that haveelevators, and Thankfully I've
(24:17):
been very lucky.
But in that those occasionsI've almost never at a concert
alone, like I'm always withsomeone, I always have people in
the front kind of blocking sothey move out of the handrail
and I have the handrail for sure, because I do have the same
situation where I lose balanceand I do need a handrail to go
up and down the stairs.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
So do you say to your person that you're wet, like,
or do they just instinctivelyknow Like, because I think
that's part of the communication, right?
Not everyone would know.
People who don't havedisabilities would not even
think that you like, thatsomeone is blocking the handrail
and that that could be aproblem, like you have to be
able to do this yourselfInitially to say, hey, when we
(24:59):
go to this, I need to be able tohave a handrail all the way
down.
Would you mind standing infront of me and like kicking
people's ass or whatever?
Speaker 4 (25:06):
Yeah, yeah, I've learned to communicate a lot and
that's something that I have todo, and it was outside my
comfort zone for the longesttime, but it's the only way I
can let people like people arenot going to read your mind,
they don't, they're not feelingwhat you're feeling, and so you
have to be able to tell them andyou know, and just be kind
about it, just like hey, willyou mind standing here, just so
(25:28):
people are not coming my way andthat's it Like.
If you are with the right groupof people, they will be happy
to jump and do that for you.
Speaker 3 (25:35):
Yeah, we'll be right back.
Speaker 6 (25:49):
This is George, Fred and Jason, the co-leaders of
Speak, available every week onall of your favorite podcast
platforms.
Join us on the Speak podcast asour speakers step onto the
(26:33):
stage and into the spotlightwith impactful ideas and stories
.
We'll let you get back to theshow.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
You were listening to another great podcast from
Launchpad 516 Studios.
You're tuning in to embrace itwith Laini Anastella, brought to
you by Launchpad 516 Studios,speaking about being kind and
communication.
I know that's not always thecase in certain scenarios and I
(27:02):
know you talk about, you knowinteractions you have in public
with ableism and you're a young,beautiful woman, maybe using a
mobility scooter or a crutch,and people are, you know,
unfortunately, judging you orassuming that you're faking it
or you're too young andbeautiful to have a disability.
Can you tell us a little bitabout that, because I feel like
(27:24):
that's an important part ofadvocacy is shining a light on,
unfortunately, some of theableism that still exists for
people with disabilities andday-to-day things like going to
the store and just living ourlives.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
Yeah.
So I think the attitude and theway that you approach questions
, even if it's a short answer,it lifts a perception on the
people that ask you or saidanything.
I think the way I answer itmight not be a long answer to
educate someone, but my attitudewhen I answer, they're like oh,
(28:00):
that's not what I expected.
Like whenever I said, forexample, they're like what
happened to you and I'm like Ihave a disability.
They're like so thrown off atthat answer.
It's so simple, but it's sofunny how they did not expect
that.
And they're like oh, and why isshe saying it like that?
And there's the people that arelike I'm sorry.
And I'm like no, no, there'snothing to be sorry about.
(28:22):
And there's all kinds ofinteractions that I get Nice,
not so nice and I get them all.
The time I went to Vegas thisweekend for a bachelor party and
a lot of people in Vegas hadscooters, so I was just making
fun of them.
I was like wow, I did really dofit the demographic here.
It's like all these casinosfull with mobility scooters.
(28:43):
I was like this is great, I'mtrying it.
But of course, I had multipleinteractions and one of those
what's funny, because we'regetting on an Uber and my group
of friends that I'm with aresetting up my scooter and
putting it on the trunk, and thegroup of girls go to me and
they're like, wow, you reallyhave great friends.
And I was like thank you, theyare amazing.
(29:04):
But I honestly wouldn't expectless from my friends and I
wouldn't be with a group offriends that won't be willing to
do that for me.
Because, again, I feel likethis goes to the inspiration
porn of making your friends andyour people that you're dating
heroes just because they'redating you and you have a
disability, and that's just sowow.
And I don't see it as so wow.
I think I'm surrounded by kindpeople and if I had someone in
(29:25):
the same situation, I'll jumpout of my way to help them.
But I think people need to beeducated on that and I wasn't
rude to them.
I was just like thank you.
And I obviously absolutelyacknowledged my friends right
after them that I'm explainingthat I'm not diminishing what
they're doing for me, like Ireally appreciate it.
But I think people need to stopwith wow, they're really great
(29:45):
friends.
And I was like no, they arefriends, that's what friends do.
If they don't do that you'rewith the wrong group of people.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Yeah, and that's really your point.
Which we talk about a lot in ourworkshops is when people say oh
, I'm so sorry, you're like.
In my TED Talk I said as anexample of ableism, but you're
too pretty to be used in crushes, or you're too pretty to be
using a scooter, and I love, Ifeel like it's more impactful
(30:16):
from someone, a young, beautifulwoman like yourself, to say
it's not a tragedy, thank you,but you know, and because you're
educating in a kind way andthose girls are going to think
differently.
But next time they say tosomeone, oh it's so great that
you're married to this woman,like, oh, you poor thing that
(30:37):
you have to take care of her andyou're offering cups to your
friends as a word to your spousenot you personally but it
diminishes that person.
It says, oh, you're a charitycase, but that they're a
contribution to the world andyou having that voice to be able
to speak that and you and yoursmall world with this group of
(30:59):
friends who you then, in Vegas,went back to, they heard the
whole thing and then youeducated them.
So they're going to go outthere as able-bodied people in
the world and they have atotally different mindset, just
from you doing that one.
Speaker 4 (31:13):
Thing.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
It's awesome.
Speaker 4 (31:15):
Yeah, as soon as I got in the car, they were like
wow, that was an amazing answer,like they were like I'm so
proud of you and I was like,thank you.
I just cannot skip anopportunity to acknowledge and
correct that without being rudeor anything.
And there's still so manyinteractions.
This weekend on Vegas I hadsomeone walk by me and they were
(31:37):
like wow, how do I qualify todo that like to be on a scooter
and I looked at them and I said,do you just have to buy it?
I was like what, do you justhave to buy a scooter if you
want to be on one?
But like, what are you talkingabout?
Speaker 2 (31:51):
So I don't mean to interrupt, but I'm thinking
about like it's all about yourtone and the energy right, like
I do not have a problem beingassertive, which means that
sometimes it comes off bad.
Like it doesn't come off in asweet way, it comes off as, like
it reinforces a stereotypeabout people with disabilities
as being crazy and bitchy orwhatever.
(32:13):
Like I'm thinking about thissummer.
I'm thinking about peopleoccupying like is I'm getting
into a pool right and peopledon't know I have a disability,
but yet I need that handrail towalk down those stairs and
people are all shouting and likelike you see it at many pools,
in many pools.
Yeah, all the time On the staffsreading books, like like I do.
You know, okay, If someonewalking in or trying to get in,
(32:37):
I always move.
People don't know that right.
So me, my education of themdoesn't come off in a nice way.
And like I love, like I'mlearning, like I think that's
great, Like how you do, it isawesome.
It's the tone, you know, itchanges everything for those
people, everyone else that theyencounter.
(32:58):
From that point on, it'sawesome.
You're very wise.
I'm gonna stop with your guy.
Why is your?
Speaker 4 (33:04):
woman.
I always just I try, I'm alwayskind, like I never want to like
come off rude, but I also wantto come off strong, like I want
to come up from a point that Ihave a voice and you probably
did not expect an answer, but ifyou are speaking to me, I'm
gonna answer and I'm gonna saysomething.
So like, if you don't want toget this interaction and that
(33:25):
makes you uncomfortable, thenstop saying the things you're
saying.
You know, stop asking whathappened to you, or like maybe
next time you ask you're gonnabe like oh, you know, maybe I
don't need to be asking this orI can approach it in a different
way, in a more kind way.
And yeah, I had so manyinteractions in Vegas because,
of course, it's full of peopleand everyone's just saying and a
(33:46):
lot of people are under theinfluence of alcohol.
Oh yeah, I was gonna say peopleare drinking.
Yeah, so I also had a guy.
He was going up on the on one ofthe stairs and I'm going on my
scooter and he yelled like fullboys.
He goes like wow, I really thinkthe wheelchair is hot, and I
(34:07):
like started laughing and Ilooked at him and I said amen,
and just like interactions likethat throughout all weekend.
But yeah, I get that every dayin my life.
Every day when I go to the gymit's like in a hospital inside a
hospital, so like I interact,like I there's a lot of people
(34:27):
crossing, so every day I getasked what happened or an
interaction of the gym or solike, and I do that every day.
So obviously, every day I'mgetting interactions from
strangers and I just learned toanswer and how to answer and in
what tone I want to answer andwhat per section I want to give
them.
With someone with a disability,I want to answer in the most
(34:50):
normal, like how I will answerany other question and how an
answer that will make them think, oh, this just sounded like any
other human answer, because weare human and we're just like
everyone else.
But people do not expect that.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Yeah, and without you know, without the self pity,
because obviously that's notsomething that you carry but
also talking about you know,friendships and relationships.
I know one of the things thatyou were worried about when you
became disabled dating, and Iknow this is a big topic for us
and I think it's a it's verymuch similar to the friendship
(35:26):
dynamic of communication.
But can you, can you share alittle bit about you know?
I know you're in a long termrelationship now and I think
this is one of the big thingsthat people with disabilities
struggle with is that you knowthat they feel worthy enough to
have a relationship, that they,that they are not a burden on
(35:46):
the person that they're with,and a lot of times they're
afraid to put themselves outthere authentically on dating
apps or disclose.
What was your personalexperience like with that,
re-answering the dating worldafter having a disability?
Speaker 4 (36:01):
So I was definitely on dating apps back in the day
before I met my partner with mypartner and I would be together
for five years now and it was sointeresting.
But I will always disclose itand I had some pictures with my
game.
Some people will think thatthey were temporary, like like
that's just something, a photowhen she had a game but I will
(36:23):
always disclose it before thefirst date, like I always say
hey, just so you know, I have aphysical disability and I want
to gain.
This is what happened and,thankfully, a lot of people that
I went out with they were notbad people to go out with, so I
didn't have any terribleexperiences but I was always
disclosing it just because Ididn't want to then end up on a
(36:46):
date with someone that did notwant to go out with me because
of that and that was definitelya no-nigger wishable for me.
But now, being in arelationship, I got to say it's
a learning curve and you're notgoing to have it all figure out
Like you're.
Like, obviously, if I were todate someone now like a
different person, like I willhave it figure out because I've
been in a relationship for fiveyears, but like at the beginning
(37:08):
, when I first started dating, Ilearned a lot of things with my
partners and with my partnerand it's just been, it's
obviously communication and it'salso being able to have
uncomfortable conversations andthings putting things out there,
being kind of up front withyour needs and how those things
are being met and how you canhelp each other and how you can.
(37:28):
But yeah, I will not lie.
Like when I first started datingback in the day I was 17, I was
probably thinking, wait, how isanyone going to want to date me
?
Like they probably are going tocare.
And I was always thinking,because I guess it goes with
accepting who you are andyourself and the value that you
(37:49):
bring and who you are as aperson and that confidence that
you build.
But when I was in the processof building that confidence I
have now, of course, I'll havemy doubts and I'll be like what
if they don't want to be with me?
And now it's almost like itdoesn't even cross my mind
because like, well, it'sliterally their loss, like what?
Like that doesn't even cross mymind, like I'm not ever
questioning what if they don'twant to be with me with a
(38:10):
disability?
Because, like, that's not aquestion in my mind If you don't
want to be with me, then Idon't want to be with you either
, like that's just not a concernat all.
But it obviously was back in theday.
It just transformed.
The more confident I became andthe more I knew that my value
doesn't have anything to do withmy disability and I was like,
(38:31):
is this just a quality that Ihave, just like any other
quality any other person canhave, and of course it makes me
different.
But everyone's different.
Everyone has different needs.
People have allergies, peopleneed glasses, you know, like
those are more common, of course, but just like that, it's just
understanding that it's a humanand it's going to be different
than who you are, like what yourexperience is, and it's being
(38:54):
able to adapt to each other,like disabled or not disabled, I
think.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
So you're a partner of those like past five years
five years, right, yeah.
How does he respond to the pitycomments that you get or he
gets you know?
I would imagine he gets a lotof looks when he's with you like
, oh, you're such a good person.
How does he respond?
Speaker 4 (39:21):
Oh.
He's immediately like oh no,she's a good person.
Like it's like he immediatelyflipped it.
Like the answer is always likeoh no, I'm lucky to be with her,
like you know, and people arelike stroke, literally stroke by
that.
But he's also learned with me.
Like you know, everyone's islearning.
He was not exposed to anyonewith a disability before dating
me, so within this five yearshe's learned a lot.
(39:42):
He's learned to oh yes, we needto advocate, we need to do this
.
He's had people refer to him,talk to him when I'm not around
and be like oh yeah, you're withthat girl that has a cane.
And he's like no, her name isJanet.
Janet, that's who I am with.
You know.
Like what are you doing?
Like, why are you referring toher like that?
But, yeah, like he tries tolike always call people out on
(40:03):
that and and on those stands.
Like I made a blog a while agotalking about the inspiration
for him, like how there's noroom on that in our relationship
, because we're like no, we'reboth valuable and that doesn't
have anything to do with mydisability and I genuinely would
not expect anything less fromany partner.
(40:23):
And then again, it's never todiminish what they do for me and
how kind and helpful they aremy friends and my boyfriend.
But it's just to put it outthere that you should not settle
for less, because this is justand like an accommodation that
you need.
It's not a, it's not negotiable.
So if people are gonna love you, they're gonna love you with
that, not Just part of it, youknow.
(40:45):
So I think that just should besomething to keep in mind when
you're starting today and you,when you're making friends, and
when you see those signs thatthey're maybe making comments
that you know we're in so nice.
So then that might be a hintthat this is just not the group
of friends.
And I know it can be hardbecause making friends is hard,
but I promise that you will findthat group of people and it
(41:06):
maybe you will have thosefriends and with time they will
Learn and be more educated bybeing around you.
Speaker 3 (41:12):
That's a great perspective that we try and
share as well.
I know it's.
It's different when it's yourlife and it when it's you know,
when it's your Experience.
But it's just we hear this timeand time again that you know
people in healthy relationships.
It's about the communication,it's about acceptance.
You both have to feelcomfortable dealing with the
(41:34):
stigmas and society and nothaving fear around what people
think of you, because you knowyou can be a very confident
person with a disability.
But if you date someone who isuncomfortable and values the
judgment of strangers, thenthey're gonna have that.
They're gonna be uncomfortablein situations with you and
(41:55):
public.
So it's important to have thatconfidence on both sides and to
never settle for anyone whoPassage judgment on you or be
too few, less than or makeshimself out to be the hero.
I know we're coming to a closehere, but I would love to share
a little bit about the excitingwork that you've been doing on
the runway.
I know you partner with somesome big brands and you are
(42:18):
really advocating for disabilityinclusion Across many different
industries.
Can share a little bit aboutthat and what's on the horizon
for for the end of this year andnext?
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (42:29):
absolutely so.
I Partnered with Tommy in thepast on me, he'll figure I.
One of my biggest things that Ilove doing is working with
brands that are Adaptive,because it's so cool that
they're making clothes forpeople with disabilities and
also because they're putting usout there.
Obviously, we are the onesmodeling the clothes.
So it's incredible and I hadamazing opportunities within
(42:52):
just three years that I've beenin social media.
I've connected with people.
I definitely think I made animpact working with some of
those brands and I am trying toget like this year, next year
I'm trying to do more of likepublic speaking, because it's
like this new venture that Ireally enjoy and I Thankfully
(43:13):
got some of the poor, someopportunities this year and I
have one coming up.
It's in Spanish, which is superexciting because I think a lot
of this content also needs totranslate to Latin America, also
need to translate to Spanish.
There's definitely lesscreators making content in
Spanish, so like that's a bigthing that I want to start doing
more of and Kind of one peoplelike me to feel represented and
(43:36):
you know that I'm speaking theirown language and that I am from
Venezuela and I'm a Latina, soI am very excited about that
opportunity coming up and I alsothink it's less common those
topics are less common in LatinAmerica.
So like it's like a big thingthat I have in the front of my
mind that I want to do, but I'mdefinitely continuing to model
(43:56):
and looking forward moreopportunities as a content
creator as well.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
So and when are we gonna see you in sports
illustrated?
Speaker 4 (44:03):
Oh, that's still on the plan.
Seriously, I've auditioned.
I Got so close last year, soclose I almost made it into like
the 12 finalists.
But it was an internationaltrip and I'm still figuring out
my Immigration process so like Icouldn't leave, I couldn't go
to that like so obviously that'sthe reason why I didn't make it
into the 12.
(44:24):
But I'm still applying becausethere's a lot of opportunities
within the US with them and I'vemet the team.
I met and Jay, and I am stilllike applying every year.
So we'll see when that happens,but yeah.
Speaker 2 (44:37):
That we have an opportunity as your followers
and people.
We will be putting, of course,links to how to find you in our
show notes, but Count us in ifwe can all tag sports
illustrated and say In the nextissue, right?
Speaker 4 (44:57):
Yes, it's definitely, it will be definitely excited.
I think they've only had onecurb with a disability Part of
limp in and that's it.
That's these and there are.
They are very diverse Inclusivemagazine and that's what they
call themselves to be.
So I think and I've called themout on that for sure I think
they should be yeah, Idefinitely have more than one
(45:20):
disabled woman in their magazinein all of the years.
So we'll see.
Speaker 2 (45:25):
Awesome, now really, I just said it, but how can
people find you?
Speaker 4 (45:29):
all right, so they can find me on Instagram at
Jaren V.
So that's why a?
E are ELB ys.
That will be also on the shownotes, but that's the same for
my tiktok.
I'm also on YouTube.
I'm starting to put morecontent out there, so look
forward to more blogs and moreof the behind the scenes of my
(45:49):
life, which is what I love aboutYouTube and and yeah, those are
the places where you can findme.
For now.
Speaker 3 (45:55):
Well, thank you for spending some time with us and
sharing your wisdom and yourpowerful story.
I think it's going to resonatewith a lot of our followers and
we're sure that they will beconnecting with you after this
show and following your contentsas you Continue to do
incredible work.
But thank you so much.
Yeah, it's been an absolutepleasure and we wish you the
(46:16):
best, and then, hopefully, wewill be crossing paths in the
next few months and years as wealign with our missions on
disability advocacy and In ourcircle of influencers.
Speaker 2 (46:29):
So See you at a concert.
So thank you for that.
Great for people who arehesitant about getting out there
and doing things.
It's all about communicationand planning and you look and
you're, you're really embracingit as as, so thank you for being
with us, and by everyone,course.
Speaker 4 (46:49):
Thank you so much.
Bye everyone.
I appreciate it.
Speaker 3 (46:52):
Bye guys.
Hey embracers, thank you somuch for listening and
supporting the embrace itpodcast brought to you by
launchpad 516 studios executive,produced by George andriabalus
and hosted by Laini Ishpia andStella we go.
Our music and sound effects arelicensed through epidemic sound
embrace.
It is hosted with bus brown.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
Do you have a disability related topic you'd
love for us to feature, or couldsomeone you know be a fabulous
guest on our show?
We would love to hear yourcomments and feature them on our
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So leave us a voicemail, or youcan even send us a text to 631
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Speaker 3 (47:32):
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While you're at it, follow usat embrace it underscore podcast
on Instagram and make sure tofollow all the great podcast
produced by launchpad 516studios we hope you join us next
time and continue to embrace it.
Welcome to the Embrace it series, where women
with all types of disabilitiescan be real, resourceful and
stylish.
With each episode, you'll walkor roll away with everyday tips,
life hacks and success storiesfrom community leaders and
influencers.
So take off your leg braces andstay a while with Lainey and
Estella.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Hi, I'm Lainey and I have CMT.
I'm a neuro-muscular disorderaffecting approximately 2.6
million people worldwide.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
That's as many as MS.
We believe disabilities shouldnever get in the way of looking
or feeling good.
Both of us wear leg braces andhave learned through our own
personal journeys to embrace itBrought to you by Launchpad 516
Studios.
Speaker 3 (00:52):
each episode is designed to challenge your own
stigmas and beliefs arounddisability.
We want our listeners to getthe most value for their time
spent with us, so we interviewsome of the most empowering
disability badasses in the world.
Through storytelling, personalexperiences and tips, we're all
reminded of our own strengthsand endless potential.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
For more information and exclusive resources, check
out our websites attrend-ablecom and hnf-curorg,
and don't forget to hit thesubscribe button for future
episodes and special promos.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
Hey everyone, welcome to another episode of the
Embracing Podcast with Laineyand Estella.
Hi everyone, it is the end ofsummer here, it's coming to a
close, but we have a fun guestwho will bring the heat from
Florida.
Her name is Yadet Dua.
She is a disability andinclusion advocate, she is a
(01:52):
content creator, she is a model,she's a badass, and we've been
following her for a while andwe're so excited to speak with
you today, yadet, welcome.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for having meand for that amazing
introduction.
I'm really, really excited tocome out here and share a little
bit of my story and myexperience with everyone that's
listening.
So thank you so much for thisopportunity.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
Yadet Estella sent me your little TED talk and I love
the title especially, which waswhy I should be the next sports
illustrated model in 2023.
So to kick us off, you, know, Ithink you should, and maybe
(02:37):
everyone else is going to put intheir vote as well.
Can you start telling us aboutyourself how you acquired, if
you acquired, a disability?
You know how you entered thedisability community and kind of
just a little synopsis of whoyou are, what you do and where
you came from.
Speaker 4 (02:55):
Yeah, so I started advocating like kind of like my
career.
I started two years ago well,three years ago now during the
pandemic and you know, when Ibecame disabled.
I became disabled when I was 15.
I went through cancer and,after receiving treatment for
chemotherapy and radiation, Ideveloped like a spinal cord
(03:17):
injury and that caused mydisability when I was 15.
So at that time and at that age, I really didn't see any
representation out there and Igrew up in Venezuela.
I moved to the US when I was 18years old.
So, especially in Latin America, I didn't see anyone on the
media, anyone not even around methat had a disability and that
(03:40):
lived a happy life with adisability.
So it was very difficult atthat time for me to understand
what was happening and how I wasgoing to become an adult and do
all the things that I alwaysthought I was doing and do all
the dreams that I had.
So about two years ago, when Iwas younger, before my
disability, I always wanted tobe a model.
(04:00):
I always wanted to be in theentertainment industry.
I was in every activity.
I danced and like a lot ofperformances during my life.
So back in 2020, I was just likethinking about what I wanted to
do with my life, and obviouslyI had a lot of free time during
the pandemic to think about whatI wanted to do, just because I
got furlough from my job andkind of like the career path
(04:22):
that I wasn't.
It was one that was excited andI liked it, but I didn't feel
that that was what I was meantto do.
Like that didn't necessarilyfit as an answer of the things
that made me passionate and thethings that I wanted to do.
So about that time is when Istarted kind of like doing the
easiest thing I could do, whichwas like taking photos and
(04:45):
putting them on the internet andlike making reels, and started
to like just put myself outthere and through putting myself
out there, I found like manyconnections and I found an
agency for modeling and then Igained like community of
followers and that's kind oflike how I started advocating
and I obviously started learningmore about disability and what
(05:06):
I can do and how I can makethings better, and it's just
been a constant, constantlearning from my community.
I feel like we give each other,you know so much wisdom and we
learn from each otherexperiences, so it's been
amazing.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
We love seeing all of the fun traveling, especially
that you do online.
But before we get into that, Idon't want to, you know,
underestimate the journey thatit took for you to go from a
fully abled teenager to having adisability after.
(05:41):
Take us more through that.
What was that emotionaltransition and journey for you?
Because I think a lot of peopledon't necessarily associate
cancer with a risk of gettinghaving a disability, and I know
through chemo induced neuropathywhether that's the cause, or
(06:03):
you know something that wasaffected with a surgery that was
this cancer related.
Can you tell us a little bitmore about what that journey is,
because I think there's a lot?
Speaker 2 (06:12):
I think that, like the spinal cord part, you know,
because, for those who arelistening, and I'm sure you know
those of you who've heard thisa million times Estella and I
both have churros disease andone of the like drugs that I see
on the do not take ever, likethere's all these.
You know this could make itworse, this could make your
disease worse, but like the onethat people say, oh, this really
(06:33):
does make everything worse.
If you have CMT is achemotherapy related drugs,
which Estella alluded to, but aspinal cord disability, like how
does that happen?
Speaker 4 (06:45):
Yeah, so to take you a little bit back through that
emotional roller coaster that itwas when I first got cancer.
I feel like I was still tooyoung to understand all of the
complication and what it meant.
Up until that time in my life Iknew cancer could be deadly,
but I really had not experiencedcancer in my family or anyone
(07:06):
around me.
And it's really crazy to thinkthat your friends going to get
cancer or your parents are goingto get cancer, but even crazier
to think that you're the onethat's going to get it.
So obviously that thought nevereven crossed my mind until
until up until the point thatthe news were delivered to me,
because up until then I had gonethrough surgery and something
was going on and they talkedabout treatment but nowhere, no
(07:27):
one ever mentioned the wordcancer.
So then, up until that day, Iwalked into the doctor office
and I see that is a chemotreatment center.
I obviously understood and satdown to the doctor and asked
about everything that was goingto happen, how long the
treatment was going to be andwhat I could expect.
So Nine, the doctor did not goeasy on that.
(07:50):
Obviously he gave the worstcase scenario just to prepare me
.
It was going to be a year-longexperience to go through about
12 cycles of chemotherapy every21 days and then after that we
had 20 discussions of radiation.
In between that year we had onesurgery plan.
I already went through onesurgery.
(08:11):
This was going to be the secondsurgery.
I had cancer on my ribs on theleft side of my back.
It's basically a cancer that isosteosarcoma.
It's very common on childrenand teenagers because it grows
on the bones.
Usually the grow happens onthis year, when you're a kid and
(08:33):
you're growing, and then thecells go crazy and build a tumor
and it's from the bone.
Mine was specifically on myribs.
Throughout all of this time Ihad to go through the treatments
and I saw this plan that we hadwith the doctor and everyone as
a personal goal that I wasgoing to finish.
(08:55):
There were not going to becomplications.
Obviously, in my mind therewere plenty of complications,
but I saw it as an end goal andI was like this is how many days
I have until the end oftreatment and I try to do my
best during that time.
I still try to live life, Istill try to go out, and it was
difficult because there weresome things I was able to do
with others.
(09:15):
I just couldn't.
I had to stay home.
I couldn't go out, I would betoo exposed.
But after that, and thinkingthat it was over and that I was
going to go back to normal,finding out that I was
developing a disability was likeI started losing balance.
I started having losingsensation on my feet and just
(09:39):
losing strength in general.
During a trip, I was on a tripand I was just feeling all the
symptoms, had no clue what wasgoing on.
This was also like three monthsafter finishing my treatment,
which was the last treatment Idid was radiation.
So three months after is when Istarted feeling the symptoms,
Going back to the doctor tryingto figure out what was going on.
It was an emotional rollercoaster because a lot of people
(10:01):
didn't have answers.
It was so difficult to go to adoctor and they are like we
don't know what caused it.
This could have been, thiscould have been, this could have
been and we don't know how tostop it and what we can
recommend is that you dophysical therapy, but after
having a diagnosis of cancer,knowing exactly what I could do
to fix it and coming to adisability diagnosis and the
(10:26):
situation that I was in,basically, and not having an
answer to what can I take tomake this stop, what can I do to
make it better, and still notknowing if it was going to be
permanent.
A lot of doctors were like itmight be permanent, it might not
be permanent.
So I obviously had many, manyquestions and I was very upset
about the fact that I couldn'tunderstand why I was going
(10:47):
through something so difficultafter winning After just winning
this battle against cancer.
I was so lost on understandingwhy this was happening and
obviously at that point Ithought that was the worst thing
that could have happened to me.
Because I was a dancer, becauseI was active all the time and I
had no clue generally how I wasgoing to do my life, just
(11:10):
because I didn't see it anywhere.
I didn't have any role models,I had simple things.
I didn't know how I was goingto be able to drive, how I was
going to be able to date, howjust the simple things on life.
I have no clue how I was goingto do.
So obviously it was verydifficult and it took me some
time.
I will say it took me aboutprobably six months, like the
(11:30):
first three months were a lotabout finding out, like going to
doctors doing treatments or inphysical therapy.
Physical therapy was done atthe house because I was very
limited physically, I couldn'treally move a lot and I went
from having a cane to two canesto a walker and they really
didn't know where I was going tostop, like to what point I was
going to lose strength.
(11:51):
So physical therapy was at myhouse.
I didn't go to school for thatbeginning of the year and the
last three months of that periodwere pretty much adjusting to
my new life, to what I was goingto do next, and I already knew
that I had to start the schoolyear that next year.
So I was kind of preparing tookay, how am I going to do this?
We got to continue like life isgoing on, basically.
(12:15):
So, mental health wise, it wasa lot, obviously because I had
to figure that out.
But I think I got to a pointwhere I was more like well, I am
15, about to be 16, and I willnever be this age again and I
really don't know how I'm goingto figure life out.
But I'm just not going to stopbecause of this kind of like my
(12:35):
mindset.
I was like I'm still going tofind a way to have fun.
I'm still going to like go outwith my friends, live my life.
And I think on the way there,on the journey that I'm going on
, I'll probably figure it out.
And that's a big part of likemy personality.
I will say like a lot of thethings that I've done in my life
is because I've taken the riskand find out on the way, like
(12:57):
that had not paralyzed me fromlike living my life.
I remember asking for permissionto my parents, being like oh, I
want to go to this concert, andthey're like well, how are you
going to do it?
It's crowded, full of people,it's probably not accessible.
And I was like I'm not sure,but I'll.
You know, I have friends aroundme and like I was the right
people and I will figure out.
And a lot of the things that Istarted doing were on situations
(13:20):
like that Cause one thing isthat Venezuela and, you know, I
think the rest of Latin Americain general needs to be more
accessible.
So even if it's alreadydifficult here in America, I
feel like even more there.
So it was not accessible at alland I had to figure a lot of
things out.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
You know there's so many things that struck me when
you were talking and Idefinitely want to get to the
concert part.
And now, as an adult that youare, I see on your Instagram
Estella tells me how you'realways going here and there and
I know our listeners would loveto hear like about your tips and
how you do that and, as anadult, and you know, plan
(13:59):
accordingly and all that.
So we'll get to that in aminute.
But as I was looking sorry, Iwas like picturing you know your
countdown calendar to beingdone cancer treatments and
you're just like you know you'rea kid.
You're like have this calendar.
It's like school is you know?
It's like counting down to.
You know summer vacation, right,and all you hear, as I would
(14:21):
imagine as a cancer patient andpeople who are just living this
world, is I've survived cancer,I've survived, I met the one
year, I met the five year, andhere you are just like counting
down until you get to startcounting on your survival.
And then you know you get tothat end and you now have all
(14:42):
these challenges, physicalchallenges that you didn't even
have before, right?
So, like you said it, only itwas like six months and you made
it seem like that's a long time.
To me it's like wow, like areyou, like you know, stopping the
search for what can help you tofit your disabilities, your
newly acquired disabilities, andthen to acceptance.
(15:04):
Like the acceptance part, youknow, like that isn't your
personality, that's likesomething in you that is like
okay, like I, you know, this ismy reality.
Now, like talk about that for aminute, like that couldn't have
been quick, right.
Like you are like now having adisability Like when did you?
(15:25):
start saying I have a disability.
Like when was that point?
Speaker 4 (15:31):
So the first thing was that I started more going
into this mindset when I became,when I was around 17.
So, like from 15 to 16, I'mstill looking to a lot of
solutions.
My parents are looking forsolutions Everyone's.
You know I'm still doingphysical therapy but, like when
I was 17, I had already adjust alot, like I adapted my life,
(15:52):
like I was not letting mydisability stop me from the
things that I was doing.
So at that point I'm veryconfident on like doing a lot of
things.
However, I'm still very lostinto my identity and how to
address and say that I have adisability, or how.
You know, how do I explain topeople when they are like what
happened to you?
(16:12):
Or you know that I then definedmyself, took a while and I will
say it was more when I moved tothe, to the US.
So when I was more like 1920,when I started identifying more
as a disabled person and Istopped looking for more answers
and like I kind of accepted myreality and obviously it was
(16:34):
also too close, I moved from myparents.
So like I was kind of like I'mdone, like I am happy where I am
, like you guys need to stoplooking for solutions, Like I'm
okay, like you know, and it'snot like you give up and you
don't like try to get, but it'sjust accepting that this is what
happened and it's a permanentthing and of course you will do
anything to fix it, but youdon't want to live your life
(16:56):
thinking over making it allabout this one solution because,
like, that's just not how Ifound my happiness personally,
so I Will say more.
When I would turn 1920 and it Iwas a few years into my
disability I started acceptingand the more I saw people put
themselves out there online andshare their story, the more
(17:17):
Confident I gained in who I was.
Speaker 3 (17:20):
Yeah, I mean it sounds like you already had a
very supportive group of friendsand family around you.
Were there any role models or,you know, examples of empowered
disabled women that youparticularly really gravitated
to and connected with?
Speaker 4 (17:37):
So someone that I saw online a long time ago.
One of the first persons that Ifound on the internet was Julia
Mercado.
She's the model.
So obviously she was one of thefirst people that I was like,
oh my god, like look at thesewomen, like, so that was one of
my first role models, both backin the day, back home I can tell
you nobody, because it's justalso a lot of the cancer
(17:59):
patients that I met and everyonedoesn't treat men with me they
didn't go through a similarsituation like this was kind of
like a new thing for my doctortoo.
So he was like what are wedoing?
Like what is happening?
Like nobody had an answer.
So I was.
I didn't have anyone for a longtime like a role model like that
.
And, yes, I had a great, greatsupport system because everyone
(18:21):
and my family and my friends,they were so willing to adapt
and so willing to.
We'll get there and we'llfigure out with you and I.
Since I was very young, I alsolearned, you know, to look for
those quality and the peoplethat I surround myself with.
So he never comes as a surpriseto me.
I'm always grateful that I havethese friends and people around
me.
But it you know, I wouldn'texpect less, I wouldn't settle
(18:44):
for less.
That I gotta say.
And I think everyone should Gointo making friends and you know
, with that mentality of theyare your true friends, they're
gonna adapt with you and they'regonna be willing to help and
understand.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
So I stopped you right there because I'm like, I
think, you know, not knowing ifour listeners have these
questions.
I have these questions.
So, like young women, right,and even with you, have great
friends that are human being,you now have a disability.
You're totally, you know,different in that you're not
able to run with them.
(19:18):
If they're, you know, wait fora contest, say, you know, let's
take the concert as an example.
Your friends knew I want to goto a concert.
It's not as simple anymore.
It's like if they're the kindof people who like to stand in
the front and, you know,whatever I don't even know what
the term is anymore, but youknow dance and like it's a very
crowded space.
I know I Personally wouldn'tput myself in that situation,
(19:42):
would be very dangerous.
I don't have great balance.
You use Building device.
I would imagine that's not yourchoice.
I don't know that.
But like your friends, as goodas they are, their lives are
being it as well.
Like they, they Did you feelguilty?
Did you feel like you wereholding people back?
How does that go on?
(20:04):
And like, how do you do aconcert?
Speaker 4 (20:06):
Yeah.
So back in the day I Felt likeI will still have some doubts
about that, like I'll still getyou know.
When it was my first time, forexample, I was like, oh my god,
I don't want to hold them back.
I don't want to.
You know, I don't want them tobe here because of me.
But one thing I learned wouldlike go into concerts and
experience, if thatcommunication is key.
(20:28):
So, like, being open with yourfriends is the best thing you
can do, like and and and havingfriends that are also willing to
ask and tell you how they feelexactly.
So, basically, what I do now isthat I'm very open.
I'm like, hey, I really don'tfeel comfortable going there,
but I'm totally fine if you do.
Like, I'll be fine for a fewminutes alone.
Like I'm, you know, and Ilearned to be flexible.
(20:50):
In that way I don't need tograb my friends with me all the
time.
Like, if I'm in an 88 section,for example, and they want to go
out there, go out there.
Sometimes I will go out therewith them, but like depends on
how I feel.
So, like I think thecommunication that you have with
your friends and and you know,it's so nice when they ask and
they're like hey, are you okay?
Are you good here?
Do you want to go?
How do you feel you know?
So, being that openrelationship with friends,
(21:13):
family, it's so importantbecause I feel like that's just
the only way you understand eachother.
I would never want my friendsto hold back because of me, but
I also would love to for them totell me what they want to do,
and if they don't want to bethere, they should be able to
tell me.
And you know, just kind of likehave that mindset of being
flexible with each other.
Everyone deserves a chance tohave fun, and if I think this is
(21:35):
comfortable and fun, I'm gonnastay here.
We'll be together for a littlebit.
Then we'll do a little bit ofwhat you want to do.
Just like any friendship ingeneral, you should be open to
listen to each other and have abalance in there.
And as far as concert back thenin Venezuela, like when I first
started going, I will alwaysstart to find a chair for a
little bit, but I still had mycrutches, so I was walking with
(21:57):
two crutches longer in the storeand then I, like the physical
therapy and gains, ran and I'mjust walking with one.
So to this day I just walk withone crotch, like one forearm
crotch, and I have a Mobilityscooter.
So, depends on where I'm going,I sometimes take my mobility
scooter with me.
(22:17):
If I know it's gonna be alittle walking in distance, I
will take my mobility scooter,just so I don't hold anyone back
because I will walk slower, butI Can, really I can walk for
long periods of time because,like I train a lot, I go to the
gym every day, like I have a lotof strength for me for standing
and walking, but I just will beslower.
So for that choice I just takemy mobility scooter and it's so
(22:39):
nice to have it because any timeyou want to sit, you sit
anything you want to stand, youthen, and a lot of the concerts
that I go to and festivals dohave a Section.
So it's so, so great that youget to, you know, have that in
close area where you can justsit and Everyone's sitting there
and you can take a break andthen maybe later you want to go
(23:00):
into the crowd, you do so, butyou can alternate.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Like that was what I wanted to know.
Like I'm picturing, I went toone concert recently Jason Maraz
and it's like old amphitheaterhere.
I'm in the trade area and youknow, as it turned out, my
husband had had spines surgeryand he's a marathon runner, so
he was actually the one who hadmore of a struggle, because it
(23:26):
was a lot of steps all the waydown and then all the way up,
and I can do steps with ahandrail without a problem, but
if there's no handrail I don'thave balance.
Okay, yes.
I'm scary at a big busy concertwhere people are kind of
blocking the handrail.
So that was my question you get, do you like you get seats that
(23:48):
are in the accessible likeaccessible seats when you go to
a Sporting event, you go to aconcert Are you getting the
accessible seats all the time?
Speaker 4 (23:57):
Not all the time, but I do look at the venue, so it
depends on what venue it is.
So if I know, like for thatexample of the handrail, or like
no handrail at all, like I tryto find seats that are on the
corner lower, or like theaccessible seats for sure, or
look at venues that haveelevators, and Thankfully I've
(24:17):
been very lucky.
But in that those occasionsI've almost never at a concert
alone, like I'm always withsomeone, I always have people in
the front kind of blocking sothey move out of the handrail
and I have the handrail for sure, because I do have the same
situation where I lose balanceand I do need a handrail to go
up and down the stairs.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
So do you say to your person that you're wet, like,
or do they just instinctivelyknow Like, because I think
that's part of the communication, right?
Not everyone would know.
People who don't havedisabilities would not even
think that you like, thatsomeone is blocking the handrail
and that that could be aproblem, like you have to be
able to do this yourselfInitially to say, hey, when we
(24:59):
go to this, I need to be able tohave a handrail all the way
down.
Would you mind standing infront of me and like kicking
people's ass or whatever?
Speaker 4 (25:06):
Yeah, yeah, I've learned to communicate a lot and
that's something that I have todo, and it was outside my
comfort zone for the longesttime, but it's the only way I
can let people like people arenot going to read your mind,
they don't, they're not feelingwhat you're feeling, and so you
have to be able to tell them andyou know, and just be kind
about it, just like hey, willyou mind standing here, just so
(25:28):
people are not coming my way andthat's it Like.
If you are with the right groupof people, they will be happy
to jump and do that for you.
Speaker 3 (25:35):
Yeah, we'll be right back.
Speaker 6 (25:49):
This is George, Fred and Jason, the co-leaders of
Speak, available every week onall of your favorite podcast
platforms.
Join us on the Speak podcast asour speakers step onto the
(26:33):
stage and into the spotlightwith impactful ideas and stories
.
We'll let you get back to theshow.
Speaker 3 (26:40):
You were listening to another great podcast from
Launchpad 516 Studios.
You're tuning in to embrace itwith Laini Anastella, brought to
you by Launchpad 516 Studios,speaking about being kind and
communication.
I know that's not always thecase in certain scenarios and I
(27:02):
know you talk about, you knowinteractions you have in public
with ableism and you're a young,beautiful woman, maybe using a
mobility scooter or a crutch,and people are, you know,
unfortunately, judging you orassuming that you're faking it
or you're too young andbeautiful to have a disability.
Can you tell us a little bitabout that, because I feel like
(27:24):
that's an important part ofadvocacy is shining a light on,
unfortunately, some of theableism that still exists for
people with disabilities andday-to-day things like going to
the store and just living ourlives.
Speaker 4 (27:39):
Yeah.
So I think the attitude and theway that you approach questions
, even if it's a short answer,it lifts a perception on the
people that ask you or saidanything.
I think the way I answer itmight not be a long answer to
educate someone, but my attitudewhen I answer, they're like oh,
(28:00):
that's not what I expected.
Like whenever I said, forexample, they're like what
happened to you and I'm like Ihave a disability.
They're like so thrown off atthat answer.
It's so simple, but it's sofunny how they did not expect
that.
And they're like oh, and why isshe saying it like that?
And there's the people that arelike I'm sorry.
And I'm like no, no, there'snothing to be sorry about.
(28:22):
And there's all kinds ofinteractions that I get Nice,
not so nice and I get them all.
The time I went to Vegas thisweekend for a bachelor party and
a lot of people in Vegas hadscooters, so I was just making
fun of them.
I was like wow, I did really dofit the demographic here.
It's like all these casinosfull with mobility scooters.
(28:43):
I was like this is great, I'mtrying it.
But of course, I had multipleinteractions and one of those
what's funny, because we'regetting on an Uber and my group
of friends that I'm with aresetting up my scooter and
putting it on the trunk, and thegroup of girls go to me and
they're like, wow, you reallyhave great friends.
And I was like thank you, theyare amazing.
(29:04):
But I honestly wouldn't expectless from my friends and I
wouldn't be with a group offriends that won't be willing to
do that for me.
Because, again, I feel likethis goes to the inspiration
porn of making your friends andyour people that you're dating
heroes just because they'redating you and you have a
disability, and that's just sowow.
And I don't see it as so wow.
I think I'm surrounded by kindpeople and if I had someone in
(29:25):
the same situation, I'll jumpout of my way to help them.
But I think people need to beeducated on that and I wasn't
rude to them.
I was just like thank you.
And I obviously absolutelyacknowledged my friends right
after them that I'm explainingthat I'm not diminishing what
they're doing for me, like Ireally appreciate it.
But I think people need to stopwith wow, they're really great
(29:45):
friends.
And I was like no, they arefriends, that's what friends do.
If they don't do that you'rewith the wrong group of people.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Yeah, and that's really your point.
Which we talk about a lot in ourworkshops is when people say oh
, I'm so sorry, you're like.
In my TED Talk I said as anexample of ableism, but you're
too pretty to be used in crushes, or you're too pretty to be
using a scooter, and I love, Ifeel like it's more impactful
(30:16):
from someone, a young, beautifulwoman like yourself, to say
it's not a tragedy, thank you,but you know, and because you're
educating in a kind way andthose girls are going to think
differently.
But next time they say tosomeone, oh it's so great that
you're married to this woman,like, oh, you poor thing that
(30:37):
you have to take care of her andyou're offering cups to your
friends as a word to your spousenot you personally but it
diminishes that person.
It says, oh, you're a charitycase, but that they're a
contribution to the world andyou having that voice to be able
to speak that and you and yoursmall world with this group of
(30:59):
friends who you then, in Vegas,went back to, they heard the
whole thing and then youeducated them.
So they're going to go outthere as able-bodied people in
the world and they have atotally different mindset, just
from you doing that one.
Speaker 4 (31:13):
Thing.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
It's awesome.
Speaker 4 (31:15):
Yeah, as soon as I got in the car, they were like
wow, that was an amazing answer,like they were like I'm so
proud of you and I was like,thank you.
I just cannot skip anopportunity to acknowledge and
correct that without being rudeor anything.
And there's still so manyinteractions.
This weekend on Vegas I hadsomeone walk by me and they were
(31:37):
like wow, how do I qualify todo that like to be on a scooter
and I looked at them and I said,do you just have to buy it?
I was like what, do you justhave to buy a scooter if you
want to be on one?
But like, what are you talkingabout?
Speaker 2 (31:51):
So I don't mean to interrupt, but I'm thinking
about like it's all about yourtone and the energy right, like
I do not have a problem beingassertive, which means that
sometimes it comes off bad.
Like it doesn't come off in asweet way, it comes off as, like
it reinforces a stereotypeabout people with disabilities
as being crazy and bitchy orwhatever.
(32:13):
Like I'm thinking about thissummer.
I'm thinking about peopleoccupying like is I'm getting
into a pool right and peopledon't know I have a disability,
but yet I need that handrail towalk down those stairs and
people are all shouting and likelike you see it at many pools,
in many pools.
Yeah, all the time On the staffsreading books, like like I do.
You know, okay, If someonewalking in or trying to get in,
(32:37):
I always move.
People don't know that right.
So me, my education of themdoesn't come off in a nice way.
And like I love, like I'mlearning, like I think that's
great, Like how you do, it isawesome.
It's the tone, you know, itchanges everything for those
people, everyone else that theyencounter.
(32:58):
From that point on, it'sawesome.
You're very wise.
I'm gonna stop with your guy.
Why is your?
Speaker 4 (33:04):
woman.
I always just I try, I'm alwayskind, like I never want to like
come off rude, but I also wantto come off strong, like I want
to come up from a point that Ihave a voice and you probably
did not expect an answer, but ifyou are speaking to me, I'm
gonna answer and I'm gonna saysomething.
So like, if you don't want toget this interaction and that
(33:25):
makes you uncomfortable, thenstop saying the things you're
saying.
You know, stop asking whathappened to you, or like maybe
next time you ask you're gonnabe like oh, you know, maybe I
don't need to be asking this orI can approach it in a different
way, in a more kind way.
And yeah, I had so manyinteractions in Vegas because,
of course, it's full of peopleand everyone's just saying and a
(33:46):
lot of people are under theinfluence of alcohol.
Oh yeah, I was gonna say peopleare drinking.
Yeah, so I also had a guy.
He was going up on the on one ofthe stairs and I'm going on my
scooter and he yelled like fullboys.
He goes like wow, I really thinkthe wheelchair is hot, and I
(34:07):
like started laughing and Ilooked at him and I said amen,
and just like interactions likethat throughout all weekend.
But yeah, I get that every dayin my life.
Every day when I go to the gymit's like in a hospital inside a
hospital, so like I interact,like I there's a lot of people
(34:27):
crossing, so every day I getasked what happened or an
interaction of the gym or solike, and I do that every day.
So obviously, every day I'mgetting interactions from
strangers and I just learned toanswer and how to answer and in
what tone I want to answer andwhat per section I want to give
them.
With someone with a disability,I want to answer in the most
(34:50):
normal, like how I will answerany other question and how an
answer that will make them think, oh, this just sounded like any
other human answer, because weare human and we're just like
everyone else.
But people do not expect that.
Speaker 3 (35:03):
Yeah, and without you know, without the self pity,
because obviously that's notsomething that you carry but
also talking about you know,friendships and relationships.
I know one of the things thatyou were worried about when you
became disabled dating, and Iknow this is a big topic for us
and I think it's a it's verymuch similar to the friendship
(35:26):
dynamic of communication.
But can you, can you share alittle bit about you know?
I know you're in a long termrelationship now and I think
this is one of the big thingsthat people with disabilities
struggle with is that you knowthat they feel worthy enough to
have a relationship, that they,that they are not a burden on
(35:46):
the person that they're with,and a lot of times they're
afraid to put themselves outthere authentically on dating
apps or disclose.
What was your personalexperience like with that,
re-answering the dating worldafter having a disability?
Speaker 4 (36:01):
So I was definitely on dating apps back in the day
before I met my partner with mypartner and I would be together
for five years now and it was sointeresting.
But I will always disclose itand I had some pictures with my
game.
Some people will think thatthey were temporary, like like
that's just something, a photowhen she had a game but I will
(36:23):
always disclose it before thefirst date, like I always say
hey, just so you know, I have aphysical disability and I want
to gain.
This is what happened and,thankfully, a lot of people that
I went out with they were notbad people to go out with, so I
didn't have any terribleexperiences but I was always
disclosing it just because Ididn't want to then end up on a
(36:46):
date with someone that did notwant to go out with me because
of that and that was definitelya no-nigger wishable for me.
But now, being in arelationship, I got to say it's
a learning curve and you're notgoing to have it all figure out
Like you're.
Like, obviously, if I were todate someone now like a
different person, like I willhave it figure out because I've
been in a relationship for fiveyears, but like at the beginning
(37:08):
, when I first started dating, Ilearned a lot of things with my
partners and with my partnerand it's just been, it's
obviously communication and it'salso being able to have
uncomfortable conversations andthings putting things out there,
being kind of up front withyour needs and how those things
are being met and how you canhelp each other and how you can.
(37:28):
But yeah, I will not lie.
Like when I first started datingback in the day I was 17, I was
probably thinking, wait, how isanyone going to want to date me
?
Like they probably are going tocare.
And I was always thinking,because I guess it goes with
accepting who you are andyourself and the value that you
(37:49):
bring and who you are as aperson and that confidence that
you build.
But when I was in the processof building that confidence I
have now, of course, I'll havemy doubts and I'll be like what
if they don't want to be with me?
And now it's almost like itdoesn't even cross my mind
because like, well, it'sliterally their loss, like what?
Like that doesn't even cross mymind, like I'm not ever
questioning what if they don'twant to be with me with a
(38:10):
disability?
Because, like, that's not aquestion in my mind If you don't
want to be with me, then Idon't want to be with you either
, like that's just not a concernat all.
But it obviously was back in theday.
It just transformed.
The more confident I became andthe more I knew that my value
doesn't have anything to do withmy disability and I was like,
(38:31):
is this just a quality that Ihave, just like any other
quality any other person canhave, and of course it makes me
different.
But everyone's different.
Everyone has different needs.
People have allergies, peopleneed glasses, you know, like
those are more common, of course, but just like that, it's just
understanding that it's a humanand it's going to be different
than who you are, like what yourexperience is, and it's being
(38:54):
able to adapt to each other,like disabled or not disabled, I
think.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
So you're a partner of those like past five years
five years, right, yeah.
How does he respond to the pitycomments that you get or he
gets you know?
I would imagine he gets a lotof looks when he's with you like
, oh, you're such a good person.
How does he respond?
Speaker 4 (39:21):
Oh.
He's immediately like oh no,she's a good person.
Like it's like he immediatelyflipped it.
Like the answer is always likeoh no, I'm lucky to be with her,
like you know, and people arelike stroke, literally stroke by
that.
But he's also learned with me.
Like you know, everyone's islearning.
He was not exposed to anyonewith a disability before dating
me, so within this five yearshe's learned a lot.
(39:42):
He's learned to oh yes, we needto advocate, we need to do this
.
He's had people refer to him,talk to him when I'm not around
and be like oh yeah, you're withthat girl that has a cane.
And he's like no, her name isJanet.
Janet, that's who I am with.
You know.
Like what are you doing?
Like, why are you referring toher like that?
But, yeah, like he tries tolike always call people out on
(40:03):
that and and on those stands.
Like I made a blog a while agotalking about the inspiration
for him, like how there's noroom on that in our relationship
, because we're like no, we'reboth valuable and that doesn't
have anything to do with mydisability and I genuinely would
not expect anything less fromany partner.
(40:23):
And then again, it's never todiminish what they do for me and
how kind and helpful they aremy friends and my boyfriend.
But it's just to put it outthere that you should not settle
for less, because this is justand like an accommodation that
you need.
It's not a, it's not negotiable.
So if people are gonna love you, they're gonna love you with
that, not Just part of it, youknow.
(40:45):
So I think that just should besomething to keep in mind when
you're starting today and you,when you're making friends, and
when you see those signs thatthey're maybe making comments
that you know we're in so nice.
So then that might be a hintthat this is just not the group
of friends.
And I know it can be hardbecause making friends is hard,
but I promise that you will findthat group of people and it
(41:06):
maybe you will have thosefriends and with time they will
Learn and be more educated bybeing around you.
Speaker 3 (41:12):
That's a great perspective that we try and
share as well.
I know it's.
It's different when it's yourlife and it when it's you know,
when it's your Experience.
But it's just we hear this timeand time again that you know
people in healthy relationships.
It's about the communication,it's about acceptance.
You both have to feelcomfortable dealing with the
(41:34):
stigmas and society and nothaving fear around what people
think of you, because you knowyou can be a very confident
person with a disability.
But if you date someone who isuncomfortable and values the
judgment of strangers, thenthey're gonna have that.
They're gonna be uncomfortablein situations with you and
(41:55):
public.
So it's important to have thatconfidence on both sides and to
never settle for anyone whoPassage judgment on you or be
too few, less than or makeshimself out to be the hero.
I know we're coming to a closehere, but I would love to share
a little bit about the excitingwork that you've been doing on
the runway.
I know you partner with somesome big brands and you are
(42:18):
really advocating for disabilityinclusion Across many different
industries.
Can share a little bit aboutthat and what's on the horizon
for for the end of this year andnext?
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (42:29):
absolutely so.
I Partnered with Tommy in thepast on me, he'll figure I.
One of my biggest things that Ilove doing is working with
brands that are Adaptive,because it's so cool that
they're making clothes forpeople with disabilities and
also because they're putting usout there.
Obviously, we are the onesmodeling the clothes.
So it's incredible and I hadamazing opportunities within
(42:52):
just three years that I've beenin social media.
I've connected with people.
I definitely think I made animpact working with some of
those brands and I am trying toget like this year, next year
I'm trying to do more of likepublic speaking, because it's
like this new venture that Ireally enjoy and I Thankfully
(43:13):
got some of the poor, someopportunities this year and I
have one coming up.
It's in Spanish, which is superexciting because I think a lot
of this content also needs totranslate to Latin America, also
need to translate to Spanish.
There's definitely lesscreators making content in
Spanish, so like that's a bigthing that I want to start doing
more of and Kind of one peoplelike me to feel represented and
(43:36):
you know that I'm speaking theirown language and that I am from
Venezuela and I'm a Latina, soI am very excited about that
opportunity coming up and I alsothink it's less common those
topics are less common in LatinAmerica.
So like it's like a big thingthat I have in the front of my
mind that I want to do, but I'mdefinitely continuing to model
(43:56):
and looking forward moreopportunities as a content
creator as well.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
So and when are we gonna see you in sports
illustrated?
Speaker 4 (44:03):
Oh, that's still on the plan.
Seriously, I've auditioned.
I Got so close last year, soclose I almost made it into like
the 12 finalists.
But it was an internationaltrip and I'm still figuring out
my Immigration process so like Icouldn't leave, I couldn't go
to that like so obviously that'sthe reason why I didn't make it
into the 12.
(44:24):
But I'm still applying becausethere's a lot of opportunities
within the US with them and I'vemet the team.
I met and Jay, and I am stilllike applying every year.
So we'll see when that happens,but yeah.
Speaker 2 (44:37):
That we have an opportunity as your followers
and people.
We will be putting, of course,links to how to find you in our
show notes, but Count us in ifwe can all tag sports
illustrated and say In the nextissue, right?
Speaker 4 (44:57):
Yes, it's definitely, it will be definitely excited.
I think they've only had onecurb with a disability Part of
limp in and that's it.
That's these and there are.
They are very diverse Inclusivemagazine and that's what they
call themselves to be.
So I think and I've called themout on that for sure I think
they should be yeah, Idefinitely have more than one
(45:20):
disabled woman in their magazinein all of the years.
So we'll see.
Speaker 2 (45:25):
Awesome, now really, I just said it, but how can
people find you?
Speaker 4 (45:29):
all right, so they can find me on Instagram at
Jaren V.
So that's why a?
E are ELB ys.
That will be also on the shownotes, but that's the same for
my tiktok.
I'm also on YouTube.
I'm starting to put morecontent out there, so look
forward to more blogs and moreof the behind the scenes of my
(45:49):
life, which is what I love aboutYouTube and and yeah, those are
the places where you can findme.
For now.
Speaker 3 (45:55):
Well, thank you for spending some time with us and
sharing your wisdom and yourpowerful story.
I think it's going to resonatewith a lot of our followers and
we're sure that they will beconnecting with you after this
show and following your contentsas you Continue to do
incredible work.
But thank you so much.
Yeah, it's been an absolutepleasure and we wish you the
(46:16):
best, and then, hopefully, wewill be crossing paths in the
next few months and years as wealign with our missions on
disability advocacy and In ourcircle of influencers.
Speaker 2 (46:29):
So See you at a concert.
So thank you for that.
Great for people who arehesitant about getting out there
and doing things.
It's all about communicationand planning and you look and
you're, you're really embracingit as as, so thank you for being
with us, and by everyone,course.
Speaker 4 (46:49):
Thank you so much.
Bye everyone.
I appreciate it.
Speaker 3 (46:52):
Bye guys.
Hey embracers, thank you somuch for listening and
supporting the embrace itpodcast brought to you by
launchpad 516 studios executive,produced by George andriabalus
and hosted by Laini Ishpia andStella we go.
Our music and sound effects arelicensed through epidemic sound
embrace.
It is hosted with bus brown.
Speaker 2 (47:11):
Do you have a disability related topic you'd
love for us to feature, or couldsomeone you know be a fabulous
guest on our show?
We would love to hear yourcomments and feature them on our
next podcast.
So leave us a voicemail, or youcan even send us a text to 631
517 0066.
Speaker 3 (47:32):
Make sure to subscribe to this feed wherever
podcasts are available and leaveus a five star review on Apple
podcasts.
While you're at it, follow usat embrace it underscore podcast
on Instagram and make sure tofollow all the great podcast
produced by launchpad 516studios we hope you join us next
time and continue to embrace it.
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