July 29, 2025 • 24 mins
Seven wild gremlin stories take center stage in this jam-packed solo episode as Emily returns after a brief illness-related hiatus. Armed with a vodka gimlet and tales of drunken shenanigans, she dives into the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy, and occasionally vindictive moments shared by her listeners.
From Leslie's hilarious mix-up when she accused her boyfriend of cheating because she spotted lipstick on his collar (spoiler alert: it was her own), to an anonymous listener's perfectly timed sidewalk vomiting session that narrowly spared an Uber driver's car interior, each story captures that universal moment when alcohol transforms us into our gremlin selves.
The collection takes a juicy turn with what Emily enthusiastically calls her favorite type of submission, witnessing someone else's gremlin moment. This particular gem features a bride's cousin (and ex of the groom) having a complete meltdown at a bridal shower. Emily's unabashed delight in this secondhand embarrassment perfectly encapsulates why we love sharing these stories, there's comfort in knowing we're not alone in our most mortifying moments.
The episode rounds out with tales of drunken injuries, alcohol-induced honesty, and even a sober but decidedly gremlin act of revenge. Throughout it all, Emily offers her characteristic blend of judgment-free commentary and occasional enablement, reminding listeners that while she might not officially "condone" certain behaviors, she absolutely understands the impulse.
Want to share your own gremlin stories or seek "gremlin guidance?" Email us at EMILYTOGREMILYPOD@GMAIL.COM and follow along on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube @emilytogremilypod.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
hey guys, emily, emily to gremily here back with
another solo episode.
I did take the week off becauseI was a little sicky and but
we're back and we got a vodkagimlet which I'm very excited to
drink because it's been aminute since I've had a drink,
and by a minute I mean severaldays.
(00:34):
But anyway, since I took a weekoff, I decided today should be
dedicated to only gremlinstories.
So I pulled.
Let's see one, two, three, four, five, six, seven stories.
I believe that's the moststories I've told in one episode
.
We have some signed, someunsigned, some anonymous, so
(00:58):
let's get straight into it.
This first one is from Leslie.
She says for reference, thiswas all told to me and, while I
do remember bits and pieces,many details needed to be filled
in.
After a fun night out with thegirls, my boyfriend was a
designated boyfriend who wasgoing to take all of us home and
(01:21):
make sure we were safe.
After dropping off two friends,we were headed back home and I
looked over at him from thepassenger seat.
I immediately become absolutelyenraged to see red lipstick
smeared on the collar of hiswhite t-shirt and glitter on his
cheek.
I go berserk, I start screamingabout how he's a cheater and I
(01:44):
start throwing napkins from ourTaco Bell drive-thru order at
him.
I am calling him every name inthe book and when we get home I
grab the food and stumblethrough the garage and into the
house, slamming the door behindme.
I wake up the next morning inmy bed with hot sauce on my
pillow and my Crunchwrap Supreme, half eaten, in my hand.
(02:06):
My boyfriend had slept on thecouch because he quote didn't
want to feel my wrath anymore.
He graciously pointed out thatthe makeup on him was put there
by me.
When I sloppily hugged andkissed him when he picked us up
from the bar and yes, the colorabsolutely matched my favorite
lipstick and silver eyeshadow Ihad been wearing the night
(02:29):
before.
That was now caked onto my sadface.
Luckily he wasn't too offendedby my rant and we are still
together.
Thank you for creating a spacewhere we can all go to feel a
little less embarrassed aboutour gremlin activities less
embarrassed about our gremlinactivities.
(02:49):
Leslie, oh yeah, I don't knowif I've ever done this, but it
would be pretty easy to tellwhat lipstick is would be on him
, because I wear a very distinctcolor, because I mix two colors
together.
So if it's anything other thanthat color, anything other than
that color cheetah.
But good thing that he was verygracious about not giving you
(03:09):
too much shit for your craziness.
But you know what can we do?
All right, the next one isunsigned.
Anonymous says.
This story happened a few weeksago, on my birthday.
I went out with three friendsbar hopping in our downtown area
Around midnight.
We decided to call it a nightand head back to my place, so we
(03:32):
ordered an Uber.
When he arrived, we all piledinto his car, with me taking the
window seat.
The ride was only going to be15 minutes, but halfway through
the ride I started to feelqueasy.
I rolled the window down to beable to breathe in the fresh air
, and luckily that helped a bit.
We finally arrived at thedestination, and I bolted out of
(03:56):
the car and onto the grass andbegan projectile vomiting all
over the grass and sidewalk.
My friends just stared at me inhorror.
Luckily, the Uber driver hadnapkins in his car and gave them
to me to wipe my mouth with.
He thanked me for not doingthat in his car, and my friends
helped me inside.
(04:16):
After the incident I did feelmuch better, though, and we
ordered some late night munchiesin our pajamas.
I was fortunate enough to notget any of my new clothes ruined
and, all in all, it was apretty successful night.
Anonymous, okay, this has neverhappened to me, but I did have a
friend and we went out todinner and then we went to go
(04:40):
see a movie, and the movietheater that I love going to
it's an AMC dine-in and theyserve food and drinks and we
took advantage of the drinks.
I also do believe we had awater bottle filled with vodka
because Gremlin activities.
So we Ubered, obviously becauseno one was okay enough to drive
(05:04):
.
We Ubered obviously because noone was okay enough to drive and
I was sitting in the front seatand I had two people in the
back seat and she had.
That's why I think we had thewater bottle.
She had a water bottle in herlap and the Uber driver starts
nudging me and he's likepointing at her and I turn
(05:24):
around and she's trying to throwup in the narrowest water
bottle opening and she made italmost all in, except for it was
all over her pants and Uberdriver was pissed.
None of it got on his car,thank God.
Like she was in her.
She was a little mindful to notget it all over his car.
(05:45):
I ended up getting a terriblereview on my Uber.
I paid the guy cash, just eventhough nothing got on his seats,
and, yeah, I ended up having towash those pants for her
because she was like dead fordays.
Good times, though that wasyears ago.
I think that was likepre-pandemic time, so it's been
(06:07):
a while, all right.
Next one let's see.
I don't know if it's signed,let me see.
Let me see Unsigned Anonymous.
She says oh, this is actually areally good one.
When I read this one I was soexcited.
She says this is not my gremlinstory, but I witnessed it
firsthand and I think it needsto be shared.
(06:29):
I was at a friend's bridalshower a couple of years ago.
I hadn't seen the bride in acouple of years, but we kept in
touch through Instagram and amutual friend of ours was one of
her bridesmaids.
When I arrived, she introducedme to her bridal party and I
started catching up with thefriend.
I knew I had noticed a womankind of sulking and acting weird
(06:50):
, so I asked who that was.
My friend said it was thebride's cousin, who had actually
dated the groom two years priorto him starting to date the
bride.
I found it odd for her to bethere, but kind of shrugged it
off.
I found it odd for her to bethere, but kind of shrugged it
off.
As the afternoon went on, we allmingled, played the traditional
(07:10):
games and had some drinks.
Well, the mopey girl had manymore drinks than everyone else.
People started noticing and Isaw a couple girls ushering her
away.
She then bursts out into a rageand starts shouting that bitch
thinks she can marry my ex.
She's a backstabbing whore.
(07:31):
And now everyone is watchingand the bride is standing there
paralyzed.
As they finally get the girlalmost out the door, she screams
his dick is small, have funwith that tiny dick.
The entire mood of the partyshifted, of course, and ended
pretty quickly after that.
(07:52):
The wedding was a couple monthslater and I did not see said
cousin in attendance.
It has to be one of thecraziest things I've witnessed
in person.
Anonymous, when I read that youhave no idea, like look, I feel
like you guys should know atthis point.
I am a nosy Nelly.
I want to know everyone'sbusiness all the time, even if I
(08:15):
don't know them.
Just because I'm that nosy,this fed my soul.
I was so excited to read this.
I, oh my God, I was like in.
I was sitting in bed on mycomputer and I was clicking my
feet together and I was giggling.
I was like I fucking love thisshit.
So, even if it's not yourgremlin story, feel free to
(08:37):
share about other people havinggremlin stories, because that
that's half of the reason why Istarted this podcast.
I love to gossip and this wasso juicy and so thick and oh, I
love that.
And for her to scream that andthe bride just stands there I
mean, poor bride Feels so badfor her, but like I would.
(08:58):
I want to witness somethinglike this in person because it
just it does something to me.
I don't know, there's probablysomething wrong with me, but I
wouldn't want it to happen tosomeone who, like I, care about,
but I would want to see ithappen.
Oof, um, I just got all giddyagain.
Yeah, I love this shit.
So if you have more of thesekinds of stories, even if
(09:20):
they're not your own, um, sendthat shit in.
I fucking love it.
Oof, I feel good again.
All right, actually, that mightbe that sip of alcohol too.
I'm going to have another one.
Okay, yay, excited.
All right.
Next one she is also anonymous,she says.
One night after a fight with mytoxic ex-boyfriend.
One night after a fight with mytoxic ex-boyfriend, I angrily
(09:42):
left his house and went outdrinking by myself.
I had been to the bar before afew times and knew there was a
cute bartender there that Icould stare at.
I texted a couple friends, butnone of them were able to meet
me, so I stayed there by myself.
At the end of the bar.
The cute bartender let's callhim John poured me several
(10:04):
tequila sodas throughout thenight and when the bar was
closing up and I was ready tobid him farewell, he told me I
could stay while he closed up.
I checked my phone and saw thehundreds of missed calls and
texts from my terrible boyfriendand decided to take the
bartender up on his offer.
Maybe not my best decision, butI definitely don't regret it.
I ended up sleeping with himand spending the next day and a
(10:25):
half with him telling him all myproblems, and he ended up being
a pretty good therapist.
I ended up breaking up with thetoxic man and, even though I
did not start dating John, I canconfidently say that my gremlin
night helped me move on and getout of a horrible situation.
He was also fantastic in bed.
So 10 out of 10 recommendAnonymous.
Look, I don't condone cheating,but sometimes all you need is a
(10:54):
good lay with a cute bartenderto kind of make you forget about
all your problems.
And yeah, 10 out of 10recommend Sorry, probably not a
very PC thing to say, but ohwell, what can we do?
It's my podcast, I can say whatI want.
All right.
Next one is Brittany.
(11:15):
Hey, I have a friend namedBrittany.
All right, she says.
After a particularly crazy nightat my sorority house about 15
years ago, I woke up still drunkbut with a terrible hangover.
Yeah, I was desperate for water, but unfortunately did not set
myself up with a water bottlethe night before.
I knew I would have to make thetreacherous journey downstairs
(11:40):
to quench my thirst.
After gathering as muchstrength as I could, I stumbled
towards the stairs with ablanket around my shoulder and
my eyes half open.
I thought I knew the layout ofthe entire house, since I had
lived there for three years, butalas I did not.
I misjudged when the step wouldbegin and my foot slipped and I
(12:02):
went tumbling down the entireflight of stairs.
It was so loud, everyone camerunning out to see me
frantically fighting with myblanket on the landing and blood
gushing from my mouth.
I had seriously busted my lipand my front tooth.
It was basically gone, knockedout, except a nub left behind.
(12:24):
Oh God, thankfully my girlswere so supportive and helped
clean me up and ice my faceuntil I could see the dentist
the following Tuesday.
Tuesday Thanks, delta Zeta.
Unfortunately, this would notbe the last drunken injury I
received, so please let me knowif you'd like other stories as
well.
Brittany, oh, okay, number one,all your drunken stories, send
(12:50):
them in.
I don't care if you send melike essays upon essays, I'll go
through them and just pick up,pick at them as I go.
Second you, okay, I can'tbelieve you had to wait until
Tuesday to see.
I'm assuming this happened on aSunday, like you had a crazy
night.
Or maybe you had a crazy nightFriday, but I'm assuming you had
a crazy night Saturday and itwas Sunday.
(13:11):
The fact you couldn't go untilTuesday, oh my God, I mean, I've
never knocked a tooth out oranything like that, and now that
I said that, I feel like I justjinxed myself.
Like as soon as I walk out ofthis studio.
I'm going to tumble down mystairs Um, let's, there's no
wood around for me to knock on.
All right, I'll just knock onmy head.
(13:31):
Um, so, I've never knocked outa tooth I've fallen drunk but,
oh, my God, I've had, like.
I remember I had a wisdom tooththat was really really like
impacted and it needed to comeout and I had been putting it
off forever.
So it's my fault, but it waslike terrible.
I had to wait until to go seean emergency dentist on a
(13:52):
Saturday actually, so it waseven more expensive.
But, yeah, that's terrible.
You had to wait and I'm sorryabout your two fees.
Your poor tooth, um, yeah,that's terrible.
I'm sorry, brittany, but let meknow about all your other
drunken injuries, because I lovethat shit too.
Um, we've all, I feel likewe've all fallen drunk.
(14:15):
I do remember actually, okay, Ididn't bust my tooth, I busted
my lip.
I was leaving this prettypopular bar here in Los Angeles
I won't mention the name becauseI'll just kind of save that
story for a different day and adifferent podcast episode but I
was leaving with my friend, wehad closed our tabs out, called
the Uber and we were headed outand it's like it's a pretty.
(14:39):
It's not a small place, it'sjust like maybe kind of like
narrow is what I would describeit and there were a ton of
people there.
So I'm trying to like wiggle myway through and, mind you,
we've been drinking for like Idon't know hours at this point
Pre-gamed at my house, then wentto the bar, had a shit ton of
drinks and it was just, you know, it was a great night, but I,
(15:03):
you know it was a great night.
But I'm trying to wiggle aroundthese people and I tripped over
I don't know if I tripped overmy own feet or tripped over
someone else or tripped over achair, I don't know.
I tripped and I hit the floorand on the way down I kind of
like hit like a corner of like atable almost, but not, it
wasn't like a corner, it wasjust like a side and
everything's like prettycushioned.
But I, either way, I like hitmyself and I got up and my lip
(15:26):
was like busted and I wasbleeding everywhere.
Like it seemed like it was morecatastrophic than it was
because of the blood.
Um, and my friend, she was likelooking at my teeth and my
teeth were fine.
I didn't ship them thank godagain, and we are trying to
leave and the security is liketelling us that they're gonna
(15:48):
call the cops on us as if, likeI was bleeding because I got
into like this like massivefight and was throwing punches
and something.
I just tripped over my own twofeet and they were acting like I
was like creating like a barbrawl.
It was wild and I was like wewere like we're going to our
uber and they're like we'regonna call the police and in my
(16:09):
head I'm like I'm drunk, oh mygod, I'm gonna get arrested.
I've never been arrested before.
So I was freaking out and wegot into the uber and everything
was fine, but haven't been backto that bar since, which.
It's a fun bar, but the factthat they made such a fucking
stink over me being drunk whenI'm there First of all, I was
(16:29):
there, bought a bunch of drinks,gave you a ton of money, and I
know the owners and they are bigdrunks themselves, so I'm sure
that they've fallen many a timein that place.
Again, I won't name the bar.
You guys can use yourimagination and those who know
me, you know who I'm talkingabout.
All right, the next one is fromMatilda.
(16:50):
Matilda says over this pastChristmas break I decided to go
back home.
For the first time in 10 yearsI've been living in the UK and
the plane fare is expensive,anyway.
So my second night back home Idecided to meet up with a
hometown friend at our local barand shoot the shit.
(17:11):
We are having a great timetalking about our crazy high
school days.
We were kind of delinquents fora minute and tossing back shots
of tequila.
After a while the bartendercomes up to me and says you look
really familiar.
Did you go to blank high school?
I say yes, I graduated in 2009.
And she happily says hey,that's the same year my sister
(17:35):
graduated.
I asked her who her sister wasand then she tells me her name
and what came over me next canonly be explained as word vomit
and tequila brain.
I say ugh, she was such afucking whore.
The girl gives me the nastiestlook and my friend just stared
(17:57):
at me wide-eyed in shock.
I immediately realized mymistake and start profusely
apologizing, but it's too late.
She walks away and I quicklyfinish my drink and we got the
hell out of there.
Look in my defense.
Her sister did make out with mythen boyfriend, but you'd think
my 34-year-old ass would beover it by now.
(18:19):
Anyway, sorry to that girl andher whore sister, matilda.
I love how you double down andstill call her a whore at the
end.
Oh, that's funny.
All right, I mean, look, Idon't think I've done this.
I mean, I'm sure I've, I'm sureI've offended a lot of people,
(18:41):
but who?
You?
You just slip up, your mouth isspeaking faster than your brain
can comprehend the words thatare coming out, and it just it
happens.
And luckily you live in the UKso you can just stay away from
hometown and local bar.
But yeah, sorry to that girland her sister.
(19:03):
I love that.
Oh my God.
All right, I feel like I gothrough these so quickly.
Do I read too fast?
Guys?
Let me know if I'm reading toofast and then I'll try to slow
it down.
But we're already at the laststory.
I went through all thesealready.
That's wild.
Yeah, maybe I read too fast.
Sorry, guys, I'll try to slowit down the next time I do this.
(19:25):
Okay, this is also anonymous.
She says so.
I know gremlin stories are whenyou are inebriated, but I was
dead sober for this one and Istill think it can qualify as
gremlin behavior.
Several years back, I found outthat my boyfriend of eight years
had been cheating on me for twoyears.
(19:46):
Ugh, what a dick.
Oh, and she says can youfucking believe that?
All caps.
I was absolutely distraught andcouldn't comprehend how this
person I thought I was going tospend my life with was capable
of that.
After I cried all my tears, Iwas enraged.
He was moving out of ourapartment and I decided to
(20:07):
untape all of his packed boxesand glitter bomb them.
It went all over his clothes,his toiletries.
I poured it into the crevicesof all of his devices.
I wanted to fuck his shit up.
After I was done with my crafts, I taped the boxes back up so
they looked good as new.
I got several calls and textsfrom him raging about how could
(20:31):
I ruin his stuff, and I washappy to hear how difficult I
had made his life.
After a couple years of therapy, working out my trust issues, I
am now in a happy relationship.
As for him, I'm sure he's stillfinding glitter and thinks of
me every time.
Haha, anonymous, all right, look, I don't condone another thing
I'm not condoning.
I don't condone ruiningsomeone's stuff, or your ex's
(20:54):
stuff or your ex friend's stuff.
I don't think that yet yet.
I say yet because don't test me.
But yeah, I don't think it's agood thing, but I do understand
(21:16):
it.
It's one of those things whereyou're like, yeah, you know, and
if she was my friend and calledme and said, hey, this is what
I think I'm gonna do, I wouldhave gassed her up because I'm
that kind of friend.
I would have been like do it,do it.
You want me to come over?
I'll totally helpassed her upbecause I'm that kind of friend.
I would have been like do it,do it.
You want me to come over, I'lltotally help you.
But you know I'm toxic and youknow you guys listen to me and
apparently you love the toxicity.
So you're in good company andI'm in good company and woohoo,
(21:38):
and that's the end of theepisode.
The Gremlin Story episodes arealways short.
I need to read slower.
Pick more, I don't know, maybepick ones I have more in common
with so I can tell you morestories with.
I don't know.
Let me know if you guys whatyour guys' thoughts are, because
I do like putting out longerepisodes.
But yeah, hopefully I alreadyhave some fun guests lined up,
(22:04):
some repeat guests, some newguests.
It's just all about you knowscheduling and you know getting
our lives to work and correspondwith each other.
So, yeah, if you have your owngremlin stories that you want to
submit, make sure to write themin emilytogremlinpod at
gmailcom.
(22:25):
Also, if you need any gremlinguidance which I'm kind of
liking my new title of that youcan also write that in Again.
Email me emilytogremilypod atgmailcom.
Make sure to also follow me andthe podcast emilytogremilypod
on Instagram and TikTok and youcan also watch this episode on
(22:48):
YouTube.
Again, consistency is key Emilyto Grammarly pod on YouTube.
And yeah, and that's the end ofthe episode, guys, the next time
you see me hear from me, I comeback on your feed.
I'm gonna be a year older.
Like I said, I was sick thisweek, so I'm filming this pretty
year older.
I'm, like I said, I was sickthis week, so I'm filming this
(23:08):
Pretty late into the week andexactly a week from today Is my
birthday and I'm gonna be a yearolder.
I don't know how I feel aboutthat, I don't know.
I'll work out my issues Withsome alcohol and possibly An
appointment for Botox.
We shall see.
But yes, hope you guys have areally great week and hope you
guys enjoyed the episode.
(23:29):
Please make sure to like,follow, share, subscribe, tell
all your friends about it, writein your gremlin stories, write
in your gremlin advice.
And yeah, let's cheers out withmy vodka gimlet, which I barely
drank.
So I'm going to chug this andcry about my rapid aging
Cheersies.
Bye.
hey guys, emily, emily to gremily here back with
another solo episode.
I did take the week off becauseI was a little sicky and but
we're back and we got a vodkagimlet which I'm very excited to
drink because it's been aminute since I've had a drink,
and by a minute I mean severaldays.
(00:34):
But anyway, since I took a weekoff, I decided today should be
dedicated to only gremlinstories.
So I pulled.
Let's see one, two, three, four, five, six, seven stories.
I believe that's the moststories I've told in one episode
.
We have some signed, someunsigned, some anonymous, so
(00:58):
let's get straight into it.
This first one is from Leslie.
She says for reference, thiswas all told to me and, while I
do remember bits and pieces,many details needed to be filled
in.
After a fun night out with thegirls, my boyfriend was a
designated boyfriend who wasgoing to take all of us home and
(01:21):
make sure we were safe.
After dropping off two friends,we were headed back home and I
looked over at him from thepassenger seat.
I immediately become absolutelyenraged to see red lipstick
smeared on the collar of hiswhite t-shirt and glitter on his
cheek.
I go berserk, I start screamingabout how he's a cheater and I
(01:44):
start throwing napkins from ourTaco Bell drive-thru order at
him.
I am calling him every name inthe book and when we get home I
grab the food and stumblethrough the garage and into the
house, slamming the door behindme.
I wake up the next morning inmy bed with hot sauce on my
pillow and my Crunchwrap Supreme, half eaten, in my hand.
(02:06):
My boyfriend had slept on thecouch because he quote didn't
want to feel my wrath anymore.
He graciously pointed out thatthe makeup on him was put there
by me.
When I sloppily hugged andkissed him when he picked us up
from the bar and yes, the colorabsolutely matched my favorite
lipstick and silver eyeshadow Ihad been wearing the night
(02:29):
before.
That was now caked onto my sadface.
Luckily he wasn't too offendedby my rant and we are still
together.
Thank you for creating a spacewhere we can all go to feel a
little less embarrassed aboutour gremlin activities less
embarrassed about our gremlinactivities.
(02:49):
Leslie, oh yeah, I don't knowif I've ever done this, but it
would be pretty easy to tellwhat lipstick is would be on him
, because I wear a very distinctcolor, because I mix two colors
together.
So if it's anything other thanthat color, anything other than
that color cheetah.
But good thing that he was verygracious about not giving you
(03:09):
too much shit for your craziness.
But you know what can we do?
All right, the next one isunsigned.
Anonymous says.
This story happened a few weeksago, on my birthday.
I went out with three friendsbar hopping in our downtown area
Around midnight.
We decided to call it a nightand head back to my place, so we
(03:32):
ordered an Uber.
When he arrived, we all piledinto his car, with me taking the
window seat.
The ride was only going to be15 minutes, but halfway through
the ride I started to feelqueasy.
I rolled the window down to beable to breathe in the fresh air
, and luckily that helped a bit.
We finally arrived at thedestination, and I bolted out of
(03:56):
the car and onto the grass andbegan projectile vomiting all
over the grass and sidewalk.
My friends just stared at me inhorror.
Luckily, the Uber driver hadnapkins in his car and gave them
to me to wipe my mouth with.
He thanked me for not doingthat in his car, and my friends
helped me inside.
(04:16):
After the incident I did feelmuch better, though, and we
ordered some late night munchiesin our pajamas.
I was fortunate enough to notget any of my new clothes ruined
and, all in all, it was apretty successful night.
Anonymous, okay, this has neverhappened to me, but I did have a
friend and we went out todinner and then we went to go
(04:40):
see a movie, and the movietheater that I love going to
it's an AMC dine-in and theyserve food and drinks and we
took advantage of the drinks.
I also do believe we had awater bottle filled with vodka
because Gremlin activities.
So we Ubered, obviously becauseno one was okay enough to drive
(05:04):
.
We Ubered obviously because noone was okay enough to drive and
I was sitting in the front seatand I had two people in the
back seat and she had.
That's why I think we had thewater bottle.
She had a water bottle in herlap and the Uber driver starts
nudging me and he's likepointing at her and I turn
(05:24):
around and she's trying to throwup in the narrowest water
bottle opening and she made italmost all in, except for it was
all over her pants and Uberdriver was pissed.
None of it got on his car,thank God.
Like she was in her.
She was a little mindful to notget it all over his car.
(05:45):
I ended up getting a terriblereview on my Uber.
I paid the guy cash, just eventhough nothing got on his seats,
and, yeah, I ended up having towash those pants for her
because she was like dead fordays.
Good times, though that wasyears ago.
I think that was likepre-pandemic time, so it's been
(06:07):
a while, all right.
Next one let's see.
I don't know if it's signed,let me see.
Let me see Unsigned Anonymous.
She says oh, this is actually areally good one.
When I read this one I was soexcited.
She says this is not my gremlinstory, but I witnessed it
firsthand and I think it needsto be shared.
(06:29):
I was at a friend's bridalshower a couple of years ago.
I hadn't seen the bride in acouple of years, but we kept in
touch through Instagram and amutual friend of ours was one of
her bridesmaids.
When I arrived, she introducedme to her bridal party and I
started catching up with thefriend.
I knew I had noticed a womankind of sulking and acting weird
(06:50):
, so I asked who that was.
My friend said it was thebride's cousin, who had actually
dated the groom two years priorto him starting to date the
bride.
I found it odd for her to bethere, but kind of shrugged it
off.
I found it odd for her to bethere, but kind of shrugged it
off.
As the afternoon went on, we allmingled, played the traditional
(07:10):
games and had some drinks.
Well, the mopey girl had manymore drinks than everyone else.
People started noticing and Isaw a couple girls ushering her
away.
She then bursts out into a rageand starts shouting that bitch
thinks she can marry my ex.
She's a backstabbing whore.
(07:31):
And now everyone is watchingand the bride is standing there
paralyzed.
As they finally get the girlalmost out the door, she screams
his dick is small, have funwith that tiny dick.
The entire mood of the partyshifted, of course, and ended
pretty quickly after that.
(07:52):
The wedding was a couple monthslater and I did not see said
cousin in attendance.
It has to be one of thecraziest things I've witnessed
in person.
Anonymous, when I read that youhave no idea, like look, I feel
like you guys should know atthis point.
I am a nosy Nelly.
I want to know everyone'sbusiness all the time, even if I
(08:15):
don't know them.
Just because I'm that nosy,this fed my soul.
I was so excited to read this.
I, oh my God, I was like in.
I was sitting in bed on mycomputer and I was clicking my
feet together and I was giggling.
I was like I fucking love thisshit.
So, even if it's not yourgremlin story, feel free to
(08:37):
share about other people havinggremlin stories, because that
that's half of the reason why Istarted this podcast.
I love to gossip and this wasso juicy and so thick and oh, I
love that.
And for her to scream that andthe bride just stands there I
mean, poor bride Feels so badfor her, but like I would.
(08:58):
I want to witness somethinglike this in person because it
just it does something to me.
I don't know, there's probablysomething wrong with me, but I
wouldn't want it to happen tosomeone who, like I, care about,
but I would want to see ithappen.
Oof, um, I just got all giddyagain.
Yeah, I love this shit.
So if you have more of thesekinds of stories, even if
(09:20):
they're not your own, um, sendthat shit in.
I fucking love it.
Oof, I feel good again.
All right, actually, that mightbe that sip of alcohol too.
I'm going to have another one.
Okay, yay, excited.
All right.
Next one she is also anonymous,she says.
One night after a fight with mytoxic ex-boyfriend.
One night after a fight with mytoxic ex-boyfriend, I angrily
(09:42):
left his house and went outdrinking by myself.
I had been to the bar before afew times and knew there was a
cute bartender there that Icould stare at.
I texted a couple friends, butnone of them were able to meet
me, so I stayed there by myself.
At the end of the bar.
The cute bartender let's callhim John poured me several
(10:04):
tequila sodas throughout thenight and when the bar was
closing up and I was ready tobid him farewell, he told me I
could stay while he closed up.
I checked my phone and saw thehundreds of missed calls and
texts from my terrible boyfriendand decided to take the
bartender up on his offer.
Maybe not my best decision, butI definitely don't regret it.
I ended up sleeping with himand spending the next day and a
(10:25):
half with him telling him all myproblems, and he ended up being
a pretty good therapist.
I ended up breaking up with thetoxic man and, even though I
did not start dating John, I canconfidently say that my gremlin
night helped me move on and getout of a horrible situation.
He was also fantastic in bed.
So 10 out of 10 recommendAnonymous.
Look, I don't condone cheating,but sometimes all you need is a
(10:54):
good lay with a cute bartenderto kind of make you forget about
all your problems.
And yeah, 10 out of 10recommend Sorry, probably not a
very PC thing to say, but ohwell, what can we do?
It's my podcast, I can say whatI want.
All right.
Next one is Brittany.
(11:15):
Hey, I have a friend namedBrittany.
All right, she says.
After a particularly crazy nightat my sorority house about 15
years ago, I woke up still drunkbut with a terrible hangover.
Yeah, I was desperate for water, but unfortunately did not set
myself up with a water bottlethe night before.
I knew I would have to make thetreacherous journey downstairs
(11:40):
to quench my thirst.
After gathering as muchstrength as I could, I stumbled
towards the stairs with ablanket around my shoulder and
my eyes half open.
I thought I knew the layout ofthe entire house, since I had
lived there for three years, butalas I did not.
I misjudged when the step wouldbegin and my foot slipped and I
(12:02):
went tumbling down the entireflight of stairs.
It was so loud, everyone camerunning out to see me
frantically fighting with myblanket on the landing and blood
gushing from my mouth.
I had seriously busted my lipand my front tooth.
It was basically gone, knockedout, except a nub left behind.
(12:24):
Oh God, thankfully my girlswere so supportive and helped
clean me up and ice my faceuntil I could see the dentist
the following Tuesday.
Tuesday Thanks, delta Zeta.
Unfortunately, this would notbe the last drunken injury I
received, so please let me knowif you'd like other stories as
well.
Brittany, oh, okay, number one,all your drunken stories, send
(12:50):
them in.
I don't care if you send melike essays upon essays, I'll go
through them and just pick up,pick at them as I go.
Second you, okay, I can'tbelieve you had to wait until
Tuesday to see.
I'm assuming this happened on aSunday, like you had a crazy
night.
Or maybe you had a crazy nightFriday, but I'm assuming you had
a crazy night Saturday and itwas Sunday.
(13:11):
The fact you couldn't go untilTuesday, oh my God, I mean, I've
never knocked a tooth out oranything like that, and now that
I said that, I feel like I justjinxed myself.
Like as soon as I walk out ofthis studio.
I'm going to tumble down mystairs Um, let's, there's no
wood around for me to knock on.
All right, I'll just knock onmy head.
(13:31):
Um, so, I've never knocked outa tooth I've fallen drunk but,
oh, my God, I've had, like.
I remember I had a wisdom tooththat was really really like
impacted and it needed to comeout and I had been putting it
off forever.
So it's my fault, but it waslike terrible.
I had to wait until to go seean emergency dentist on a
(13:52):
Saturday actually, so it waseven more expensive.
But, yeah, that's terrible.
You had to wait and I'm sorryabout your two fees.
Your poor tooth, um, yeah,that's terrible.
I'm sorry, brittany, but let meknow about all your other
drunken injuries, because I lovethat shit too.
Um, we've all, I feel likewe've all fallen drunk.
(14:15):
I do remember actually, okay, Ididn't bust my tooth, I busted
my lip.
I was leaving this prettypopular bar here in Los Angeles
I won't mention the name becauseI'll just kind of save that
story for a different day and adifferent podcast episode but I
was leaving with my friend, wehad closed our tabs out, called
the Uber and we were headed outand it's like it's a pretty.
(14:39):
It's not a small place, it'sjust like maybe kind of like
narrow is what I would describeit and there were a ton of
people there.
So I'm trying to like wiggle myway through and, mind you,
we've been drinking for like Idon't know hours at this point
Pre-gamed at my house, then wentto the bar, had a shit ton of
drinks and it was just, you know, it was a great night, but I,
(15:03):
you know it was a great night.
But I'm trying to wiggle aroundthese people and I tripped over
I don't know if I tripped overmy own feet or tripped over
someone else or tripped over achair, I don't know.
I tripped and I hit the floorand on the way down I kind of
like hit like a corner of like atable almost, but not, it
wasn't like a corner, it wasjust like a side and
everything's like prettycushioned.
But I, either way, I like hitmyself and I got up and my lip
(15:26):
was like busted and I wasbleeding everywhere.
Like it seemed like it was morecatastrophic than it was
because of the blood.
Um, and my friend, she was likelooking at my teeth and my
teeth were fine.
I didn't ship them thank godagain, and we are trying to
leave and the security is liketelling us that they're gonna
(15:48):
call the cops on us as if, likeI was bleeding because I got
into like this like massivefight and was throwing punches
and something.
I just tripped over my own twofeet and they were acting like I
was like creating like a barbrawl.
It was wild and I was like wewere like we're going to our
uber and they're like we'regonna call the police and in my
(16:09):
head I'm like I'm drunk, oh mygod, I'm gonna get arrested.
I've never been arrested before.
So I was freaking out and wegot into the uber and everything
was fine, but haven't been backto that bar since, which.
It's a fun bar, but the factthat they made such a fucking
stink over me being drunk whenI'm there First of all, I was
(16:29):
there, bought a bunch of drinks,gave you a ton of money, and I
know the owners and they are bigdrunks themselves, so I'm sure
that they've fallen many a timein that place.
Again, I won't name the bar.
You guys can use yourimagination and those who know
me, you know who I'm talkingabout.
All right, the next one is fromMatilda.
(16:50):
Matilda says over this pastChristmas break I decided to go
back home.
For the first time in 10 yearsI've been living in the UK and
the plane fare is expensive,anyway.
So my second night back home Idecided to meet up with a
hometown friend at our local barand shoot the shit.
(17:11):
We are having a great timetalking about our crazy high
school days.
We were kind of delinquents fora minute and tossing back shots
of tequila.
After a while the bartendercomes up to me and says you look
really familiar.
Did you go to blank high school?
I say yes, I graduated in 2009.
And she happily says hey,that's the same year my sister
(17:35):
graduated.
I asked her who her sister wasand then she tells me her name
and what came over me next canonly be explained as word vomit
and tequila brain.
I say ugh, she was such afucking whore.
The girl gives me the nastiestlook and my friend just stared
(17:57):
at me wide-eyed in shock.
I immediately realized mymistake and start profusely
apologizing, but it's too late.
She walks away and I quicklyfinish my drink and we got the
hell out of there.
Look in my defense.
Her sister did make out with mythen boyfriend, but you'd think
my 34-year-old ass would beover it by now.
(18:19):
Anyway, sorry to that girl andher whore sister, matilda.
I love how you double down andstill call her a whore at the
end.
Oh, that's funny.
All right, I mean, look, Idon't think I've done this.
I mean, I'm sure I've, I'm sureI've offended a lot of people,
(18:41):
but who?
You?
You just slip up, your mouth isspeaking faster than your brain
can comprehend the words thatare coming out, and it just it
happens.
And luckily you live in the UKso you can just stay away from
hometown and local bar.
But yeah, sorry to that girland her sister.
(19:03):
I love that.
Oh my God.
All right, I feel like I gothrough these so quickly.
Do I read too fast?
Guys?
Let me know if I'm reading toofast and then I'll try to slow
it down.
But we're already at the laststory.
I went through all thesealready.
That's wild.
Yeah, maybe I read too fast.
Sorry, guys, I'll try to slowit down the next time I do this.
(19:25):
Okay, this is also anonymous.
She says so.
I know gremlin stories are whenyou are inebriated, but I was
dead sober for this one and Istill think it can qualify as
gremlin behavior.
Several years back, I found outthat my boyfriend of eight years
had been cheating on me for twoyears.
(19:46):
Ugh, what a dick.
Oh, and she says can youfucking believe that?
All caps.
I was absolutely distraught andcouldn't comprehend how this
person I thought I was going tospend my life with was capable
of that.
After I cried all my tears, Iwas enraged.
He was moving out of ourapartment and I decided to
(20:07):
untape all of his packed boxesand glitter bomb them.
It went all over his clothes,his toiletries.
I poured it into the crevicesof all of his devices.
I wanted to fuck his shit up.
After I was done with my crafts, I taped the boxes back up so
they looked good as new.
I got several calls and textsfrom him raging about how could
(20:31):
I ruin his stuff, and I washappy to hear how difficult I
had made his life.
After a couple years of therapy, working out my trust issues, I
am now in a happy relationship.
As for him, I'm sure he's stillfinding glitter and thinks of
me every time.
Haha, anonymous, all right, look, I don't condone another thing
I'm not condoning.
I don't condone ruiningsomeone's stuff, or your ex's
(20:54):
stuff or your ex friend's stuff.
I don't think that yet yet.
I say yet because don't test me.
But yeah, I don't think it's agood thing, but I do understand
(21:16):
it.
It's one of those things whereyou're like, yeah, you know, and
if she was my friend and calledme and said, hey, this is what
I think I'm gonna do, I wouldhave gassed her up because I'm
that kind of friend.
I would have been like do it,do it.
You want me to come over?
I'll totally helpassed her upbecause I'm that kind of friend.
I would have been like do it,do it.
You want me to come over, I'lltotally help you.
But you know I'm toxic and youknow you guys listen to me and
apparently you love the toxicity.
So you're in good company andI'm in good company and woohoo,
(21:38):
and that's the end of theepisode.
The Gremlin Story episodes arealways short.
I need to read slower.
Pick more, I don't know, maybepick ones I have more in common
with so I can tell you morestories with.
I don't know.
Let me know if you guys whatyour guys' thoughts are, because
I do like putting out longerepisodes.
But yeah, hopefully I alreadyhave some fun guests lined up,
(22:04):
some repeat guests, some newguests.
It's just all about you knowscheduling and you know getting
our lives to work and correspondwith each other.
So, yeah, if you have your owngremlin stories that you want to
submit, make sure to write themin emilytogremlinpod at
gmailcom.
(22:25):
Also, if you need any gremlinguidance which I'm kind of
liking my new title of that youcan also write that in Again.
Email me emilytogremilypod atgmailcom.
Make sure to also follow me andthe podcast emilytogremilypod
on Instagram and TikTok and youcan also watch this episode on
(22:48):
YouTube.
Again, consistency is key Emilyto Grammarly pod on YouTube.
And yeah, and that's the end ofthe episode, guys, the next time
you see me hear from me, I comeback on your feed.
I'm gonna be a year older.
Like I said, I was sick thisweek, so I'm filming this pretty
year older.
I'm, like I said, I was sickthis week, so I'm filming this
(23:08):
Pretty late into the week andexactly a week from today Is my
birthday and I'm gonna be a yearolder.
I don't know how I feel aboutthat, I don't know.
I'll work out my issues Withsome alcohol and possibly An
appointment for Botox.
We shall see.
But yes, hope you guys have areally great week and hope you
guys enjoyed the episode.
(23:29):
Please make sure to like,follow, share, subscribe, tell
all your friends about it, writein your gremlin stories, write
in your gremlin advice.
And yeah, let's cheers out withmy vodka gimlet, which I barely
drank.
So I'm going to chug this andcry about my rapid aging
Cheersies.
Bye.
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