September 9, 2024 • 31 mins
Can emotional intelligence be the key to unlocking your business potential? Join me and Micaela Passeri, an award-winning emotional intelligence and business performance coach, to explore her incredible journey from founding the Love You Revolution clothing line to becoming a transformative coach. Micaela shares how her clients' struggles with feelings of inauthenticity while wearing her affirmation-filled clothing led her to develop powerful coaching techniques focused on self-acceptance and emotional intelligence. We delve into the profound impact of emotional intelligence in the workplace, examining how it enhances productivity, confidence, and communication, ultimately leading to greater financial success and business growth.
Discover the secrets to achieving personal and professional breakthroughs as Micaela provides valuable insights into the importance of self-belief, strategy, and emotional intelligence. Learn how a lack of clear strategy can hinder entrepreneurial progress and how past experiences and traumas shape one’s drive and success. This episode highlights the significance of unlearning conditioned behaviors and the essential role coaching plays in helping individuals overcome limitations. Whether you're an entrepreneur looking to unlock financial abundance or someone seeking personal growth, this episode is a treasure trove of wisdom on harnessing the power of emotional intelligence.
Show Notes:
Micaela Passeri
https://loveyourevolution.com
Facebook: @realmicaelapasseri
Email: hello@loveyourevolution.com
Your Amazing Itty Bitty Affirmations Book: 15 Ways to Make Empowering Messages Work for You: https://a.co/d/bXjDY4d
Music clip by The Beach Boys, "Good Vibrations"
Want to learn how to build your EQ? Let's meet to see if working together is good fit.
* Calendar: https://calendly.com/jami-carlacio/virtual-coffee
* Email: jami@jamicarlacio.com (mailto:%20jami@jamicarlacio.com)
* Find out more about my coaching services: https://jamicarlacio.com
* LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jami-carlacio/
* FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/jamicarlacioEQ
* Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jamicarlacio1/
* YouTube: https://tinyurl.com/jamicarlacio1
* TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jcarlacio
* Substack: https://substack.com/@eqmaven
* I'd appreciate your support the show by buying me a cup of coffee: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2167520/supporters/new
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You cannot go anywhere unless you apply
strategy, and I see a lot ofentrepreneurs just throw
spaghetti at the wall and say,okay, let's do six today, and
then, five years down the road,they're still throwing spaghetti
and seeing what sticks.
And the reason is they haven'tapplied strategy.
And so when these big people,we see, these mega millions, I
(00:21):
guarantee you they're applyingvery specific strategy.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Hello and welcome to the podcast Emotional
Intelligence your greatest assetand key to success.
I'm your host, dr JamieCarlaccio, coming to you from
the greater New Haven,connecticut area, as a positive
intelligence, or PQ, coach.
I'm committed to helping peopledevelop both emotional
intelligence and mental fitness.
That is, you'll come to regardproblems as situations that help
you learn and grow.
(00:58):
Pq is a way of being and doingin the world that enables you to
develop and sustain a positiverelationship with yourself and
others, at home, at work andeverywhere in between.
Please subscribe to thispodcast and tap the like button
so more people can enjoy thebenefits of PQ.
And now here's the show.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Hello everybody and welcome to the podcast Emotional
Intelligence, and I am so gladyou're here.
I have an awesome guest with metoday.
Her name is Michaela Passeriand, if you can't tell, by the
way, I pronounce that she isItalian and she has dual
citizenship, in the US and inEurope, and we're going to talk
(01:40):
a little bit about what happenswhen major shifts come in your
life and what happens when youdevelop something called the
love you revolution, and whathappens when you discover the
value of having emotionalintelligence in the workplace.
I know that for most people,they would dearly love to see
(02:02):
that everywhere they work, andif you've paid any attention to
any of the conversations in thenews or online, you know that
that's a big thing for peopleright now.
So I'm excited to talk to youabout that, michaela.
But first let me give you a fewinteresting tidbits about her.
So she is a USA andEuropean-based award-winning
(02:24):
emotional intelligence andbusiness performance coach.
She's a best-selling author,international speaker, community
leader and founder of theEmotional Money Mastery Business
Training Program and the Loveyour Evolution Retreat in Italy.
With over 20 years ofexperience building six seven
(02:44):
figure businesses, micaela putsher business degree, her
experience and her manycertifications to use, helping
entrepreneurs fully unlock theirfinancial abundance with
strategic monetization and salesstructure implementation.
That's a mouthful, but I'm sureit's awesome.
She uses her proprietarytechnique of marrying business
(03:07):
ROI planning with emotionalsubconscious release.
This is a big one.
We should definitely touch onthat some more Emotional
subconscious release.
We're giving them thefundamental tools of emotional
intelligence so that theyperform efficiently, increase
their confidence, stand in theirclarity and have better
communication and increaseproductivity and product
(03:30):
profitability.
And I noticed I was sitting upstraight just reading that
because it sounds so importantand I felt like, oh yeah, that's
exactly what we need.
We need to stand in our power.
So she firmly believes thatbusiness success is directly
tied to an individual's abilityto free him or herself from the
emotional ties of the past, andanyone who's listened to any of
(03:54):
these podcasts knows I talk alot about trauma and how that
affects our decisions.
It affects how we show up inthe world every day, how we show
up to ourself and others, andso your emotional intelligence
level and your ability to manageall of these emotions in all
areas of life is a predictor ofyour income, your success and
(04:16):
your expansion.
And so Michaela is an expert onthat and she tells, she shows
people how to, how to sort ofget rid of all that baggage and
live into that success that youalready are and were meant to be
.
Her work has helped hundreds ofclients boost their
self-confidence, tap into theirwisdom, increase their
(04:37):
productivity, banish anxiety yayand the demotivation and the
crippled momentum.
And she helps people cure thatbusiness stagnation and monetize
their business to six figuresand beyond.
And she's also the Global WomanClub Director for LA and she
sits on the board of the OceanConservancy, dana Blue, so
(05:00):
welcome.
Thank you so much for beinghere with us today.
How are you doing?
Speaker 1 (05:04):
I'm doing very well.
Thank you so much for beinghere with us today.
How are you doing?
I'm doing very well.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
Good, I'm glad.
So I am interested in learninga little bit about how you came
to the.
Love you revolution.
And then I want to find outmore about how you help
businesses and people in generalin the workplace develop the
kind of emotional intelligencethat kind of catapults them into
success beyond their wildestdreams.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Yeah, yes, and I know we have a limited amount of
time because we could be talkingabout this for like hours.
So well, first I'll start.
You know, love you Revolutionwas actually a clothing line
that I started.
When was it?
Probably 2006 time, 2005, 2006time, and it was really a.
(05:57):
It was birthed out of my ownjourney in search to love myself
, and what happened is, as I waswriting the messages that I
then would put on the clothes, Ifound that a lot of my clients
(06:17):
would buy my things and thenwouldn't be able to wear them.
One of my I'll tell you why in amoment yeah, a signature
messages was I love who I am,and so I sold I don't know how
many I love who I am t-shirts.
(06:38):
But I would get often womencalling me back and say you know
, I love your stuff, I love myshirt, but it's been sitting on
my bedside table for two weeksand I can't wear it.
And so I would then startasking the cable, why like what?
Why don't you?
Why can't you wear it?
(06:58):
What is this about?
And so we'd engage in this verydeep, profound conversation
about how they felt like a fraud.
The message, the t-shirt hadthem realize that they needed to
do some work and they wouldn'twear it because they felt they
(07:19):
were fraudulent, but they did so.
As I continued to do that workand, you know, put more and more
messages out there it justnaturally brought me to coaching
, because I found myselfcoaching my clients that would
buy my shirts and not wear theminto finding their own path and
(07:41):
their kind of journey back tothemselves, which is what I was
doing at that time.
I was on that journey at thatpoint, so really, the clothing
line love you revolution was acatalyst for my own growth, but
then it's what brought me tothen become a coach and, you
know, do the work that I do now.
(08:03):
Yeah, so I want to pick up on acouple of things you said you
know, do the work that I do now?
Speaker 3 (08:05):
Yeah, so I want to pick up on a couple of things
you said.
You know you started writingthese things on clothing and I
know you have a little book ofaffirmations, which I think is
(08:25):
feel affirmed, and that we allhave bad days, or we all have
days we don't like ourselves, orwe don't like something we've
done, or we get hurt feelings.
So I do think that affirmationsare great.
I'm wondering, when you say youwrote those on your clothes,
did you ever wonder, was thereever a time when you couldn't
have worn that clothing?
(08:46):
You know you're saying thatsome of the women would buy them
and then they wouldn't wear it.
Did you ever find like, oh, Icould never wear that, I love
myself, or whatever?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
no, I never felt that way.
I knew that I.
I knew that there was a part ofmyself that didn't, that I
wasn't fully loving myself, butI never felt that I couldn't
wear the message.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
So tell me more about that.
How do you go from sort of Idon't really love myself, but I
can wear this clothing?
Were you sort of living into it?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Yeah, I was doing the work.
You know I was doing the workand I didn't.
I didn't feel that wearing theshirt was so the way that I was.
You have to think about it.
I was creating the shirt, I waswriting a message, I was
producing, so my view on theline was way different than the
(09:45):
end consumer.
Yeah, I think that just thefact that I was using my
creativity to create it alreadyput me in a different
perspective.
Yeah, think about then wearingthe things that I was creating,
but someone who wasn't doingthat and was just receiving the
message and viewing it.
They have a whole differentperspective and view on the
(10:05):
message and on the piece ofclothing itself.
So I think I'm not really agood example for whether or not
you know what I'm saying,because it was part of my
process, it was part of mycatharsis, but I do want to say
that, yes, we affirm all thetime.
We're affirming 24 hours a day,seven days a week, you know,
(10:28):
for the length of our life, andso what we want to think about
is what are we affirming?
I'm not good enough.
I'm not lovable, you know.
Are we affirming, you know,feelings of inadequacy, um, are
we affirming, you know, negativeself-talk and beating ourselves
up?
What are we affirming?
And so the t-shirt was a way tohelp women navigate themselves
(10:56):
back to positive self-talk,because I know we are experts in
the self-beat up and thenegative self-talk, so it was a
tool to help women get thereRight and then eventually it it.
It was a tool for me as well,um, but we're constantly, you
know, constantly affirming andwe want to focus on, we want to
(11:19):
really think about what are wetalking to ourselves every day?
What are we saying to ourselvesevery day?
Because we are, you know, onaverage 60,000 to 80,000
thoughts a day, and the majorityof those thoughts are negative.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
And they're also repetitive.
So the 60,000 thoughts you didon Monday came back on Tuesday.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
So, um, so then, yeah .
So then, as I kind of delvedinto that, I, um, I noticed what
I had done for myself.
Uh, you know, I noticed that Ihad raised my emotional
intelligence throughout myjourney and my work, I had
raised my emotional vibration,and so I kind of focused in on a
(12:05):
couple of modalities that Ifelt were straight to the point,
that got me the results, thatgot me straight to the thing
that was in my unconscious, inmy subconscious, that I couldn't
see, I couldn't put a finger on, that, I couldn't really get to
on my own, and that's what Igot certified in.
And then that's what I use, andexecutives and people in office
, all with the idea that they'relooking to achieve something in
(12:58):
their professional or businessarena that they haven't been
able to achieve yet.
And so then you've got to lookat the leader of that business,
the leader of that party, theleader of that department, right
, and who is he or she right?
What is he or she saying tothemselves?
(13:22):
What's their inner conversation?
What is it that holds them back?
What is it that has them takecertain action and not other
action?
How are they disempowered?
Because when we look at that,then we can help that leader
right, that owner, thatentrepreneur step into the next,
better version of themselvesand step into their full
(13:44):
potential so that they canachieve the results that they
want, whether they're monetary,whether they're, you know, just
general goals, whether they'reachievements, whatever it is
right, whether they'rerelationship driven, health
driven, it all starts with me.
It all starts with theindividual, with the person.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Absolutely.
I was thinking too as you weretalking.
We have a lot of unconsciousblocks, so oftentimes we don't
even know the extent to whichwe've been blocked or we've been
sabotaging ourselves orstepping in our own way.
(14:24):
I know that for me.
I've been doing a lot of work onthe shadow and if anyone knows
anything about Jungianpsychology, you know that that
we all have a shadow self andit's it's more more important to
embrace it than try to pretendit doesn't exist or to shove it
away.
But it's more like let's get toknow you.
Who are you?
What have you been?
What have you been telling meall my life?
(14:46):
Maybe we can start having adifferent conversation.
And what's interesting to me isthere are a lot of people, if
not everybody, who needs to dothis kind of work, who would
benefit from it, but some peoplehave been successful despite it
and some people have not beensuccessful because of it.
Do you hear that distinctionI'm making?
(15:07):
Yep, I know what you're talkingabout, so I'm interested in
that and I'm just kind of musingout loud.
I don't know if you have like agreat answer to that, but just
thinking about people who arewildly successful but are maybe
tormented on the inside andmaybe they don't sleep well at
night, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, it is a really hard question to
answer because we could answerit in so many different ways.
I do a lot of work aroundemotional frequency and
vibration and consciousnesslevel.
When I work with my clients, Iread their emotional vibration,
(15:47):
can tell them where they are ontheir evolutionary stage, on
their consciousness evolution,and so I get a similar question
a lot, which is well so how canthen you know, you know like the
big mega conglomerate peoplemake all that money?
Yeah, and so my answer to thatis number one we don't know them
(16:09):
personally.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Number two they clearly believe in themselves
and they clearly have positiveyou know beliefs around
themselves and theircapabilities.
So that is part of what goesinto our conditioning or
unconditioning right and it'spart of what drives us.
And because there's a lot ofdifferent things that go into
(16:33):
what we create and how we liveour life and how we experience
our life, there's just no rightor wrong answer that is.
The best answer that I havecome up with is that they have,
you know, come to believecertain things about themselves,
such that they've arrived wherethey arrived and they've
(16:55):
married that with strategy,because one of the things that I
tell my clients is that youcannot go anywhere unless you
apply strategy.
And I see a lot of entrepreneursjust throw spaghetti at the
wall and say, okay, let's do sixtoday, and then, five years
down the road, they're stillthrowing spaghetti and seeing
what sticks.
(17:15):
And the reason is they haven'tapplied strategy.
And so when these big people,we see, mega millions, I
guarantee you they're applyingvery specific strategy.
So it's a combination of a lotof different things, but
strategy and self and belief inself and belief in capabilities
(17:38):
is there.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
So you know, we have a trauma response.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
We can still have PTSD.
Speaker 3 (18:02):
So, yeah, you and we have a judge and nine saboteurs
that help that judge, and wehave the hyperachiever.
And so the hyperachiever issomeone who needs to succeed,
and sometimes people feel thattheir worth is measured in the
(18:22):
size of their bank account orthe number of their friends, or
the whatever the big house, orthe number of certificates on
the wall or whatever the numberof letters after their name, and
so that often will fuel peopleinto success without really
thinking about why.
Do you feel the need to do thatExactly?
(18:43):
And is there something you'retrying to prove to yourself, or
you know something that happenedin your life where you learned
subconsciously this is what Ihave to do to be okay.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Yeah, and I also.
I also believe that there's agreater plan.
You know, if we look at historyand we look at who have defined
our history, not only in ourculture but around the world
those people were destined forthat, and so I also believe that
there's part of that, it's partof your soul signature, it's
(19:16):
part of why you're on thisplanet and incarnate in that
individual is that you're onthat path to contribute to the
world in a huge way.
So there's some universal lawshappening as well, you know.
Yeah, I mean I would agree, it'snot a very clear answer.
Speaker 3 (19:41):
No, and there are lots of schools of thought.
Some people might not believein the in the sole contract kind
of thing.
I happen to because I feel likeI've had the experience of
knowing where.
I've been and I'm getting as Iget older.
I wouldn't say this was eventrue five years ago, but as I've
(20:01):
gotten older, I've noticed thateverything that has happened to
me is an accumulation of thingsthat needed to happen in order
for me to learn what I need tolearn and maybe do what I need
to do or be what I need to be.
And so some of the what I wouldconsider crappy experiences of
my earlier life helped me andshaped me and gave me the tools
(20:28):
I needed to develop in order todo the stuff I do now that I
wouldn't have had otherwise.
So it wasn't like, wow, great,yeah, I had this, you know
traumatic experience, but ohyeah, so I have that.
I'm not there anymore.
I don't live in the jungle.
The tiger is paper, it's notreal.
I'm an adult, I can defendmyself and I don't have to take
(20:52):
whatever's being dished out atme.
But if I hadn't had any of that,I wouldn't do the podcast, I
wouldn't be an emotionalintelligence coach.
You know, I wouldn't have been.
I wouldn't have met you onspeakers uh's Playhouse, where
we met and learned about yourwork, as you know, an emotional
(21:13):
intelligence coach in theworkplace.
And also I just love the ideaof the Love you Revolution and
the idea of writing those thingson shirts or wherever else you
write them, maybe hats?
Do you have any scarves?
Speaker 1 (21:34):
I actually don't.
It's been years.
I've retired that.
I gave it to my daughter.
She hasn't done anything withit yet she's in school, but I'm
hoping she will.
So I haven't really doneanything with the clothing line
in a long time and I I pivotedto coaching and supporting
people at a deeper level.
(21:57):
But you know, I I believe that,similar to you, that you know,
we, we have a.
We come with a purpose and wecome with ways to achieve that
purpose, and it's all a bigconglomerate of lessons and
challenges and pain and also joy.
(22:17):
But whether or not somebodybelieves that there's a soul or
not, the is that human beingsgrow based on the experiences
that they have, and so nobodycan really deny that right.
And so when we take a look atthat and we take a look at okay,
(22:38):
so what did I make up aboutthis experience and how is this
experience leading, how did itlead into my future, which I'm
experiencing now, and thenconnecting the dots and helping
them create distance and adisconnection from whatever they
made up and that experience andcreate a new, more empowering
(22:59):
conversation.
Yeah, that's what helps peoplemove forward and create miracles
in their life.
And and I, I know I'm I'mliving proof and my clients are
living proof.
So I I know what can happenwhen we do this really, really
deep, deep work.
And some people are not readyfor it, and that's okay, cause
everybody's on their journey.
Um, people are afraid of it,and so it takes them a little
(23:21):
bit of time.
Some people are ready.
I was ready Like.
I was like, whatever, I'll doeverything.
I went all the way for it.
So, um, but yeah, it's, youknow, uh, raising your own
emotional intelligence istotally possible.
It is a skill that you have towork on because you have to undo
(23:42):
your conditioning, so you haveto condition yourself, and
usually you can't do it on yourown.
You need someone who can gothrough the process, who can
help you see what you can't see.
Like, think about yourself as afishbowl, and you've been
sitting in the water of thatfishbowl for 20, 30, 40, 50
years.
You don't, you can't see thatthat water is murky, that that
(24:06):
water is stale.
You need a new bowl of water,and so then you need someone to
pluck you out and put you into anew, into a new bowl.
And that's what you knowcoaches do, that's what mentors
do, that's what you know.
This space is in.
This work is for you know.
Speaker 3 (24:24):
Yeah, and I was thinking as you were talking.
It reminds me that that theonly for me, the only way I
could do this work is if I hadwalked through it and learned
what I learned and develop theskills that I needed and gained
the insights that I gained.
And I was definitely not readyto do any of this in my 20s.
(24:48):
I was still excuse my languagebatshit crazy, and I admitted I
will own that one, and anyonewho knows me and has known me
that long will agree and that'sokay.
I finally came to the place ofyeah, you're right, you were
there and then you learned thisthing, and now you're here.
You were there and then youlearned this thing, and now
you're here.
And what I find to be true forme is when I bump up against a
(25:15):
situation again that I thoughtthat I was done with, I'm like,
okay, afgo, another freakinggrowth opportunity.
So maybe I have a little bitmore to learn, but as long as I
can keep it in, that it's anAFGO and not woe is me, and this
is terrible.
Sorry, I have a sciatica, so Ijust had a twitch there Then
(25:38):
it's okay, right.
It's like, yeah, this is it.
Life is road bumps.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
And the key is to use yourawareness so that, when you're
aware that you're going down thedownward spiral, you can catch
yourself and then take a breathand shift.
Yeah right, um, because it'seasy to just get tagged and then
it's easy to go down that, ohyes, that spiral of you know
(26:04):
self beat up or negativethinking, or or even, you know,
destructive behavior you knowwhether it's a type of behavior
or whether it's abusive likeverbally, mentally or physically
Right?
So I was just on a on a summit afew weeks ago around
narcissistic parental abuse.
(26:25):
So it it, you know it, it willspan the gamut, right.
So we need to make, we need toreally use our awareness
awareness is key number one toshift ourselves and support
ourselves in getting out of thatpotential even worse situation
(26:51):
potential even worse situation.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Yeah, yeah, you know, we talked a lot about or at
least the term has, I think,gained a lot of currency
neuroplasticity.
So our brains are malleable inso far as when you were saying,
going down the rabbit hole,which is what I think of it, as
we have that neural pathwaywhere the judge and his buddies
live, or her buddies, orwhatever, and then if we can
learn, oh whoops, that's myhyperachiever talking, or that's
(27:14):
my people pleaser talking, orthere's my victim at it again,
you know, trying to give me,absolve me of any responsibility
, but if we can head that off atthe pass, which we do with
practice, yeah, and then webuild that new pathway yeah, and
it's very important tounderstand, uh, that the new
(27:36):
pathways have to be built inorder for the old conversations
to be dissolved, because if wethink about our mind as a field,
and then you see that the field, there's some paths that have
been traveled and there's nomore grass in the field because
we've been traveling down thatpath for a while.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Those are the limiting beliefs, disempowering
conversations, the conditioning,all of that, and so, in order
for us to really let go anddisconnect and dissolve those,
we have to take that breath andshift and go down a new path,
and that's where we create newneuropathways, and that's
neuroplasticity that you weretalking about is creating new
(28:20):
neuropathways in the brain, sothat then the brain can go.
Oh okay, wait a minute, thisside makes me feel better than
this side, so I'm going to godown this side, right, and so it
takes practice, it does takepractice, it does Committed to
your own growth and evolution.
Speaker 3 (28:37):
And commitment and willingness.
You have to say, you know, yeah, I'm done, I'm done, just done.
And it takes a leap of faith.
It does.
It takes stepping over yourfear or through it or wherever
you want to do around it,whatever you got to do, but
there's always fear.
Fear is underneath so manythings that stop us from being
(29:01):
who we truly can be and maybeare meant to be.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:06):
Fear is so corrosive.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
Fear is the number one emotion that trips us up in
life and in business.
It makes things up in our headthat are not real.
Unless you're in a life ordeath situation, you should have
no business being afraid.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
Right, right.
I mean there's natural fear.
I think of it as a real tigerand a paper tiger and our brains
evolved to say real tiger, yeah, get the heck out of dodge
stand still hide under a bush.
But when it's a paper tiger andour brain thinks it's real,
then we're stuck in that kind ofstasis.
And so what your coaching doesand what I do with my clients is
(29:46):
say let's get you out of thatstasis and recognizing when
you're in that place andrecognize it for what it is.
You know, it is not real.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
Yeah, yeah, false evidence appearing real, that's
fair, exactly yeah.
Yeah, yeah, and there's anotherone F everything and run yeah
and there's another one Feverything and run, run, run,
run that one.
Speaker 3 (30:11):
Yeah, yeah, try to be careful not to swear, because
people who know me know that Iusually don't hold back.
But I don't know, maybe this isa polite podcast.
At any rate, I absolutely lovetalking to you.
Thank you so much for sharingyourself with us.
Thank you for having me.
Yeah, it's been great, andMichaela's stuff will be in the
(30:33):
show notes if you want to reachout to her and find out a little
bit more about what it's liketo be a business leader or work
in a place where magic canreally happen.
You know, happiness, magic,miracles, yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Yeah, yeah, it's um, you know it's an amazing uh
place to be and it's an amazingjourney, even with.
You know the ups and downs andthe challenges.
So we'd love to, yeah, toconnect with anybody.
Uh, you can find me on Facebookthe links that Jamie has as
(31:10):
well.
Anybody is interested toknowing what their emotional
vibration is.
That's also, I think, one ofthe links that's going to be in
the show notes, so we'd love tospeak with anybody.
Yeah, awesome, I'll see younext time.
You cannot go anywhere unless you apply
strategy, and I see a lot ofentrepreneurs just throw
spaghetti at the wall and say,okay, let's do six today, and
then, five years down the road,they're still throwing spaghetti
and seeing what sticks.
And the reason is they haven'tapplied strategy.
And so when these big people,we see, these mega millions, I
(00:21):
guarantee you they're applyingvery specific strategy.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Hello and welcome to the podcast Emotional
Intelligence your greatest assetand key to success.
I'm your host, dr JamieCarlaccio, coming to you from
the greater New Haven,connecticut area, as a positive
intelligence, or PQ, coach.
I'm committed to helping peopledevelop both emotional
intelligence and mental fitness.
That is, you'll come to regardproblems as situations that help
you learn and grow.
(00:58):
Pq is a way of being and doingin the world that enables you to
develop and sustain a positiverelationship with yourself and
others, at home, at work andeverywhere in between.
Please subscribe to thispodcast and tap the like button
so more people can enjoy thebenefits of PQ.
And now here's the show.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Hello everybody and welcome to the podcast Emotional
Intelligence, and I am so gladyou're here.
I have an awesome guest with metoday.
Her name is Michaela Passeriand, if you can't tell, by the
way, I pronounce that she isItalian and she has dual
citizenship, in the US and inEurope, and we're going to talk
(01:40):
a little bit about what happenswhen major shifts come in your
life and what happens when youdevelop something called the
love you revolution, and whathappens when you discover the
value of having emotionalintelligence in the workplace.
I know that for most people,they would dearly love to see
(02:02):
that everywhere they work, andif you've paid any attention to
any of the conversations in thenews or online, you know that
that's a big thing for peopleright now.
So I'm excited to talk to youabout that, michaela.
But first let me give you a fewinteresting tidbits about her.
So she is a USA andEuropean-based award-winning
(02:24):
emotional intelligence andbusiness performance coach.
She's a best-selling author,international speaker, community
leader and founder of theEmotional Money Mastery Business
Training Program and the Loveyour Evolution Retreat in Italy.
With over 20 years ofexperience building six seven
(02:44):
figure businesses, micaela putsher business degree, her
experience and her manycertifications to use, helping
entrepreneurs fully unlock theirfinancial abundance with
strategic monetization and salesstructure implementation.
That's a mouthful, but I'm sureit's awesome.
She uses her proprietarytechnique of marrying business
(03:07):
ROI planning with emotionalsubconscious release.
This is a big one.
We should definitely touch onthat some more Emotional
subconscious release.
We're giving them thefundamental tools of emotional
intelligence so that theyperform efficiently, increase
their confidence, stand in theirclarity and have better
communication and increaseproductivity and product
(03:30):
profitability.
And I noticed I was sitting upstraight just reading that
because it sounds so importantand I felt like, oh yeah, that's
exactly what we need.
We need to stand in our power.
So she firmly believes thatbusiness success is directly
tied to an individual's abilityto free him or herself from the
emotional ties of the past, andanyone who's listened to any of
(03:54):
these podcasts knows I talk alot about trauma and how that
affects our decisions.
It affects how we show up inthe world every day, how we show
up to ourself and others, andso your emotional intelligence
level and your ability to manageall of these emotions in all
areas of life is a predictor ofyour income, your success and
(04:16):
your expansion.
And so Michaela is an expert onthat and she tells, she shows
people how to, how to sort ofget rid of all that baggage and
live into that success that youalready are and were meant to be
.
Her work has helped hundreds ofclients boost their
self-confidence, tap into theirwisdom, increase their
(04:37):
productivity, banish anxiety yayand the demotivation and the
crippled momentum.
And she helps people cure thatbusiness stagnation and monetize
their business to six figuresand beyond.
And she's also the Global WomanClub Director for LA and she
sits on the board of the OceanConservancy, dana Blue, so
(05:00):
welcome.
Thank you so much for beinghere with us today.
How are you doing?
Speaker 1 (05:04):
I'm doing very well.
Thank you so much for beinghere with us today.
How are you doing?
I'm doing very well.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
Good, I'm glad.
So I am interested in learninga little bit about how you came
to the.
Love you revolution.
And then I want to find outmore about how you help
businesses and people in generalin the workplace develop the
kind of emotional intelligencethat kind of catapults them into
success beyond their wildestdreams.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Yeah, yes, and I know we have a limited amount of
time because we could be talkingabout this for like hours.
So well, first I'll start.
You know, love you Revolutionwas actually a clothing line
that I started.
When was it?
Probably 2006 time, 2005, 2006time, and it was really a.
(05:57):
It was birthed out of my ownjourney in search to love myself
, and what happened is, as I waswriting the messages that I
then would put on the clothes, Ifound that a lot of my clients
(06:17):
would buy my things and thenwouldn't be able to wear them.
One of my I'll tell you why in amoment yeah, a signature
messages was I love who I am,and so I sold I don't know how
many I love who I am t-shirts.
(06:38):
But I would get often womencalling me back and say you know
, I love your stuff, I love myshirt, but it's been sitting on
my bedside table for two weeksand I can't wear it.
And so I would then startasking the cable, why like what?
Why don't you?
Why can't you wear it?
(06:58):
What is this about?
And so we'd engage in this verydeep, profound conversation
about how they felt like a fraud.
The message, the t-shirt hadthem realize that they needed to
do some work and they wouldn'twear it because they felt they
(07:19):
were fraudulent, but they did so.
As I continued to do that workand, you know, put more and more
messages out there it justnaturally brought me to coaching
, because I found myselfcoaching my clients that would
buy my shirts and not wear theminto finding their own path and
(07:41):
their kind of journey back tothemselves, which is what I was
doing at that time.
I was on that journey at thatpoint, so really, the clothing
line love you revolution was acatalyst for my own growth, but
then it's what brought me tothen become a coach and, you
know, do the work that I do now.
(08:03):
Yeah, so I want to pick up on acouple of things you said you
know, do the work that I do now?
Speaker 3 (08:05):
Yeah, so I want to pick up on a couple of things
you said.
You know you started writingthese things on clothing and I
know you have a little book ofaffirmations, which I think is
(08:25):
feel affirmed, and that we allhave bad days, or we all have
days we don't like ourselves, orwe don't like something we've
done, or we get hurt feelings.
So I do think that affirmationsare great.
I'm wondering, when you say youwrote those on your clothes,
did you ever wonder, was thereever a time when you couldn't
have worn that clothing?
(08:46):
You know you're saying thatsome of the women would buy them
and then they wouldn't wear it.
Did you ever find like, oh, Icould never wear that, I love
myself, or whatever?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
no, I never felt that way.
I knew that I.
I knew that there was a part ofmyself that didn't, that I
wasn't fully loving myself, butI never felt that I couldn't
wear the message.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
So tell me more about that.
How do you go from sort of Idon't really love myself, but I
can wear this clothing?
Were you sort of living into it?
Speaker 1 (09:21):
Yeah, I was doing the work.
You know I was doing the workand I didn't.
I didn't feel that wearing theshirt was so the way that I was.
You have to think about it.
I was creating the shirt, I waswriting a message, I was
producing, so my view on theline was way different than the
(09:45):
end consumer.
Yeah, I think that just thefact that I was using my
creativity to create it alreadyput me in a different
perspective.
Yeah, think about then wearingthe things that I was creating,
but someone who wasn't doingthat and was just receiving the
message and viewing it.
They have a whole differentperspective and view on the
(10:05):
message and on the piece ofclothing itself.
So I think I'm not really agood example for whether or not
you know what I'm saying,because it was part of my
process, it was part of mycatharsis, but I do want to say
that, yes, we affirm all thetime.
We're affirming 24 hours a day,seven days a week, you know,
(10:28):
for the length of our life, andso what we want to think about
is what are we affirming?
I'm not good enough.
I'm not lovable, you know.
Are we affirming, you know,feelings of inadequacy, um, are
we affirming, you know, negativeself-talk and beating ourselves
up?
What are we affirming?
And so the t-shirt was a way tohelp women navigate themselves
(10:56):
back to positive self-talk,because I know we are experts in
the self-beat up and thenegative self-talk, so it was a
tool to help women get thereRight and then eventually it it.
It was a tool for me as well,um, but we're constantly, you
know, constantly affirming andwe want to focus on, we want to
(11:19):
really think about what are wetalking to ourselves every day?
What are we saying to ourselvesevery day?
Because we are, you know, onaverage 60,000 to 80,000
thoughts a day, and the majorityof those thoughts are negative.
Speaker 3 (11:34):
And they're also repetitive.
So the 60,000 thoughts you didon Monday came back on Tuesday.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
So, um, so then, yeah .
So then, as I kind of delvedinto that, I, um, I noticed what
I had done for myself.
Uh, you know, I noticed that Ihad raised my emotional
intelligence throughout myjourney and my work, I had
raised my emotional vibration,and so I kind of focused in on a
(12:05):
couple of modalities that Ifelt were straight to the point,
that got me the results, thatgot me straight to the thing
that was in my unconscious, inmy subconscious, that I couldn't
see, I couldn't put a finger on, that, I couldn't really get to
on my own, and that's what Igot certified in.
And then that's what I use, andexecutives and people in office
, all with the idea that they'relooking to achieve something in
(12:58):
their professional or businessarena that they haven't been
able to achieve yet.
And so then you've got to lookat the leader of that business,
the leader of that party, theleader of that department, right
, and who is he or she right?
What is he or she saying tothemselves?
(13:22):
What's their inner conversation?
What is it that holds them back?
What is it that has them takecertain action and not other
action?
How are they disempowered?
Because when we look at that,then we can help that leader
right, that owner, thatentrepreneur step into the next,
better version of themselvesand step into their full
(13:44):
potential so that they canachieve the results that they
want, whether they're monetary,whether they're, you know, just
general goals, whether they'reachievements, whatever it is
right, whether they'rerelationship driven, health
driven, it all starts with me.
It all starts with theindividual, with the person.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Absolutely.
I was thinking too as you weretalking.
We have a lot of unconsciousblocks, so oftentimes we don't
even know the extent to whichwe've been blocked or we've been
sabotaging ourselves orstepping in our own way.
(14:24):
I know that for me.
I've been doing a lot of work onthe shadow and if anyone knows
anything about Jungianpsychology, you know that that
we all have a shadow self andit's it's more more important to
embrace it than try to pretendit doesn't exist or to shove it
away.
But it's more like let's get toknow you.
Who are you?
What have you been?
What have you been telling meall my life?
(14:46):
Maybe we can start having adifferent conversation.
And what's interesting to me isthere are a lot of people, if
not everybody, who needs to dothis kind of work, who would
benefit from it, but some peoplehave been successful despite it
and some people have not beensuccessful because of it.
Do you hear that distinctionI'm making?
(15:07):
Yep, I know what you're talkingabout, so I'm interested in
that and I'm just kind of musingout loud.
I don't know if you have like agreat answer to that, but just
thinking about people who arewildly successful but are maybe
tormented on the inside andmaybe they don't sleep well at
night, I don't know.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
Yeah, yeah, I mean, it is a really hard question to
answer because we could answerit in so many different ways.
I do a lot of work aroundemotional frequency and
vibration and consciousnesslevel.
When I work with my clients, Iread their emotional vibration,
(15:47):
can tell them where they are ontheir evolutionary stage, on
their consciousness evolution,and so I get a similar question
a lot, which is well so how canthen you know, you know like the
big mega conglomerate peoplemake all that money?
Yeah, and so my answer to thatis number one we don't know them
(16:09):
personally.
Speaker 3 (16:11):
Right.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Number two they clearly believe in themselves
and they clearly have positiveyou know beliefs around
themselves and theircapabilities.
So that is part of what goesinto our conditioning or
unconditioning right and it'spart of what drives us.
And because there's a lot ofdifferent things that go into
(16:33):
what we create and how we liveour life and how we experience
our life, there's just no rightor wrong answer that is.
The best answer that I havecome up with is that they have,
you know, come to believecertain things about themselves,
such that they've arrived wherethey arrived and they've
(16:55):
married that with strategy,because one of the things that I
tell my clients is that youcannot go anywhere unless you
apply strategy.
And I see a lot of entrepreneursjust throw spaghetti at the
wall and say, okay, let's do sixtoday, and then, five years
down the road, they're stillthrowing spaghetti and seeing
what sticks.
(17:15):
And the reason is they haven'tapplied strategy.
And so when these big people,we see, mega millions, I
guarantee you they're applyingvery specific strategy.
So it's a combination of a lotof different things, but
strategy and self and belief inself and belief in capabilities
(17:38):
is there.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
So you know, we have a trauma response.
Speaker 1 (17:42):
We can still have PTSD.
Speaker 3 (18:02):
So, yeah, you and we have a judge and nine saboteurs
that help that judge, and wehave the hyperachiever.
And so the hyperachiever issomeone who needs to succeed,
and sometimes people feel thattheir worth is measured in the
(18:22):
size of their bank account orthe number of their friends, or
the whatever the big house, orthe number of certificates on
the wall or whatever the numberof letters after their name, and
so that often will fuel peopleinto success without really
thinking about why.
Do you feel the need to do thatExactly?
(18:43):
And is there something you'retrying to prove to yourself, or
you know something that happenedin your life where you learned
subconsciously this is what Ihave to do to be okay.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Yeah, and I also.
I also believe that there's agreater plan.
You know, if we look at historyand we look at who have defined
our history, not only in ourculture but around the world
those people were destined forthat, and so I also believe that
there's part of that, it's partof your soul signature, it's
(19:16):
part of why you're on thisplanet and incarnate in that
individual is that you're onthat path to contribute to the
world in a huge way.
So there's some universal lawshappening as well, you know.
Yeah, I mean I would agree, it'snot a very clear answer.
Speaker 3 (19:41):
No, and there are lots of schools of thought.
Some people might not believein the in the sole contract kind
of thing.
I happen to because I feel likeI've had the experience of
knowing where.
I've been and I'm getting as Iget older.
I wouldn't say this was eventrue five years ago, but as I've
(20:01):
gotten older, I've noticed thateverything that has happened to
me is an accumulation of thingsthat needed to happen in order
for me to learn what I need tolearn and maybe do what I need
to do or be what I need to be.
And so some of the what I wouldconsider crappy experiences of
my earlier life helped me andshaped me and gave me the tools
(20:28):
I needed to develop in order todo the stuff I do now that I
wouldn't have had otherwise.
So it wasn't like, wow, great,yeah, I had this, you know
traumatic experience, but ohyeah, so I have that.
I'm not there anymore.
I don't live in the jungle.
The tiger is paper, it's notreal.
I'm an adult, I can defendmyself and I don't have to take
(20:52):
whatever's being dished out atme.
But if I hadn't had any of that,I wouldn't do the podcast, I
wouldn't be an emotionalintelligence coach.
You know, I wouldn't have been.
I wouldn't have met you onspeakers uh's Playhouse, where
we met and learned about yourwork, as you know, an emotional
(21:13):
intelligence coach in theworkplace.
And also I just love the ideaof the Love you Revolution and
the idea of writing those thingson shirts or wherever else you
write them, maybe hats?
Do you have any scarves?
Speaker 1 (21:34):
I actually don't.
It's been years.
I've retired that.
I gave it to my daughter.
She hasn't done anything withit yet she's in school, but I'm
hoping she will.
So I haven't really doneanything with the clothing line
in a long time and I I pivotedto coaching and supporting
people at a deeper level.
(21:57):
But you know, I I believe that,similar to you, that you know,
we, we have a.
We come with a purpose and wecome with ways to achieve that
purpose, and it's all a bigconglomerate of lessons and
challenges and pain and also joy.
(22:17):
But whether or not somebodybelieves that there's a soul or
not, the is that human beingsgrow based on the experiences
that they have, and so nobodycan really deny that right.
And so when we take a look atthat and we take a look at okay,
(22:38):
so what did I make up aboutthis experience and how is this
experience leading, how did itlead into my future, which I'm
experiencing now, and thenconnecting the dots and helping
them create distance and adisconnection from whatever they
made up and that experience andcreate a new, more empowering
(22:59):
conversation.
Yeah, that's what helps peoplemove forward and create miracles
in their life.
And and I, I know I'm I'mliving proof and my clients are
living proof.
So I I know what can happenwhen we do this really, really
deep, deep work.
And some people are not readyfor it, and that's okay, cause
everybody's on their journey.
Um, people are afraid of it,and so it takes them a little
(23:21):
bit of time.
Some people are ready.
I was ready Like.
I was like, whatever, I'll doeverything.
I went all the way for it.
So, um, but yeah, it's, youknow, uh, raising your own
emotional intelligence istotally possible.
It is a skill that you have towork on because you have to undo
(23:42):
your conditioning, so you haveto condition yourself, and
usually you can't do it on yourown.
You need someone who can gothrough the process, who can
help you see what you can't see.
Like, think about yourself as afishbowl, and you've been
sitting in the water of thatfishbowl for 20, 30, 40, 50
years.
You don't, you can't see thatthat water is murky, that that
(24:06):
water is stale.
You need a new bowl of water,and so then you need someone to
pluck you out and put you into anew, into a new bowl.
And that's what you knowcoaches do, that's what mentors
do, that's what you know.
This space is in.
This work is for you know.
Speaker 3 (24:24):
Yeah, and I was thinking as you were talking.
It reminds me that that theonly for me, the only way I
could do this work is if I hadwalked through it and learned
what I learned and develop theskills that I needed and gained
the insights that I gained.
And I was definitely not readyto do any of this in my 20s.
(24:48):
I was still excuse my languagebatshit crazy, and I admitted I
will own that one, and anyonewho knows me and has known me
that long will agree and that'sokay.
I finally came to the place ofyeah, you're right, you were
there and then you learned thisthing, and now you're here.
You were there and then youlearned this thing, and now
you're here.
And what I find to be true forme is when I bump up against a
(25:15):
situation again that I thoughtthat I was done with, I'm like,
okay, afgo, another freakinggrowth opportunity.
So maybe I have a little bitmore to learn, but as long as I
can keep it in, that it's anAFGO and not woe is me, and this
is terrible.
Sorry, I have a sciatica, so Ijust had a twitch there Then
(25:38):
it's okay, right.
It's like, yeah, this is it.
Life is road bumps.
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
And the key is to use yourawareness so that, when you're
aware that you're going down thedownward spiral, you can catch
yourself and then take a breathand shift.
Yeah right, um, because it'seasy to just get tagged and then
it's easy to go down that, ohyes, that spiral of you know
(26:04):
self beat up or negativethinking, or or even, you know,
destructive behavior you knowwhether it's a type of behavior
or whether it's abusive likeverbally, mentally or physically
Right?
So I was just on a on a summit afew weeks ago around
narcissistic parental abuse.
(26:25):
So it it, you know it, it willspan the gamut, right.
So we need to make, we need toreally use our awareness
awareness is key number one toshift ourselves and support
ourselves in getting out of thatpotential even worse situation
(26:51):
potential even worse situation.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Yeah, yeah, you know, we talked a lot about or at
least the term has, I think,gained a lot of currency
neuroplasticity.
So our brains are malleable inso far as when you were saying,
going down the rabbit hole,which is what I think of it, as
we have that neural pathwaywhere the judge and his buddies
live, or her buddies, orwhatever, and then if we can
learn, oh whoops, that's myhyperachiever talking, or that's
(27:14):
my people pleaser talking, orthere's my victim at it again,
you know, trying to give me,absolve me of any responsibility
, but if we can head that off atthe pass, which we do with
practice, yeah, and then webuild that new pathway yeah, and
it's very important tounderstand, uh, that the new
(27:36):
pathways have to be built inorder for the old conversations
to be dissolved, because if wethink about our mind as a field,
and then you see that the field, there's some paths that have
been traveled and there's nomore grass in the field because
we've been traveling down thatpath for a while.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Those are the limiting beliefs, disempowering
conversations, the conditioning,all of that, and so, in order
for us to really let go anddisconnect and dissolve those,
we have to take that breath andshift and go down a new path,
and that's where we create newneuropathways, and that's
neuroplasticity that you weretalking about is creating new
(28:20):
neuropathways in the brain, sothat then the brain can go.
Oh okay, wait a minute, thisside makes me feel better than
this side, so I'm going to godown this side, right, and so it
takes practice, it does takepractice, it does Committed to
your own growth and evolution.
Speaker 3 (28:37):
And commitment and willingness.
You have to say, you know, yeah, I'm done, I'm done, just done.
And it takes a leap of faith.
It does.
It takes stepping over yourfear or through it or wherever
you want to do around it,whatever you got to do, but
there's always fear.
Fear is underneath so manythings that stop us from being
(29:01):
who we truly can be and maybeare meant to be.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (29:06):
Fear is so corrosive.
Speaker 1 (29:08):
Fear is the number one emotion that trips us up in
life and in business.
It makes things up in our headthat are not real.
Unless you're in a life ordeath situation, you should have
no business being afraid.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
Right, right.
I mean there's natural fear.
I think of it as a real tigerand a paper tiger and our brains
evolved to say real tiger, yeah, get the heck out of dodge
stand still hide under a bush.
But when it's a paper tiger andour brain thinks it's real,
then we're stuck in that kind ofstasis.
And so what your coaching doesand what I do with my clients is
(29:46):
say let's get you out of thatstasis and recognizing when
you're in that place andrecognize it for what it is.
You know, it is not real.
Speaker 1 (29:57):
Yeah, yeah, false evidence appearing real, that's
fair, exactly yeah.
Yeah, yeah, and there's anotherone F everything and run yeah
and there's another one Feverything and run, run, run,
run that one.
Speaker 3 (30:11):
Yeah, yeah, try to be careful not to swear, because
people who know me know that Iusually don't hold back.
But I don't know, maybe this isa polite podcast.
At any rate, I absolutely lovetalking to you.
Thank you so much for sharingyourself with us.
Thank you for having me.
Yeah, it's been great, andMichaela's stuff will be in the
(30:33):
show notes if you want to reachout to her and find out a little
bit more about what it's liketo be a business leader or work
in a place where magic canreally happen.
You know, happiness, magic,miracles, yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
Yeah, yeah, it's um, you know it's an amazing uh
place to be and it's an amazingjourney, even with.
You know the ups and downs andthe challenges.
So we'd love to, yeah, toconnect with anybody.
Uh, you can find me on Facebookthe links that Jamie has as
(31:10):
well.
Anybody is interested toknowing what their emotional
vibration is.
That's also, I think, one ofthe links that's going to be in
the show notes, so we'd love tospeak with anybody.
Yeah, awesome, I'll see younext time.
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