September 18, 2024 • 19 mins
[Episode 24] Throughout my career as an entrepreneur, I've been bankrupt once, lost everything twice, and been broke more times than I'd like to admit, and one of the biggest lessons I've learned from these failures is our language creates our reality. The words we speak and thoughts we think create the life we live. In this new episode, I will share 12 language patterns we can use to take control of our lives and shape our reality. If you want more success, control, and abundance in your life, this is a must-watch episode.
🕒 Timestamps:
- 00:00 - Introduction: Why Words Matter
- 02:48 - Breaking the Victim Mentality Through Language
- 03:58 - Insights from "The Four Agreements" on the Power of Words
- 05:01 - Practical Reframes to Empower Your Daily Language
- 08:04 - Choosing Growth: Language Patterns for Personal Development
- 09:11 - Transforming Language to Shift Reality
- 10:33 - Empowering Financial Language Shifts
- 11:53 - Changing Daily Narratives to Enhance Personal Power
- 13:01 - Reframing Time Management and Priorities
- 14:49 - Turning Challenges into Opportunities for Growth
- 17:06 - The Ultimate Influence of Language on Life
Key Takeaways:
- Learn how to reframe your language to seize control over your circumstances and mindset.
- Discover language patterns that can turn everyday challenges into growth opportunities.
- Understand the importance of intentional speech for personal and professional success.
📌 #PersonalDevelopment #MindsetShift #Empowerment #LanguagePatterns #TheFourAgreements
If you're ready to transform how you speak about your life and your challenges, this episode is a must-listen! Remember to like, share, and subscribe for more content that empowers you to take control of your narrative. Drop a comment below to let us know how you're reshaping your world with the power of words!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
if you can bring more intention, more awareness
around the words that you'resaying, you're going to create
way more abundance, experienceand value for yourself in life.
You know, and here's the thing,when you first start to do this
, it's not going to come natural.
It's something that you have towork at.
Like anything, this is a muscleyou have to build, and I've
(00:24):
built this muscle by beingintentional and practicing.
So, anything this is a muscleyou have to build, and I've
built this muscle by beingintentional and practicing.
So again, you wake up and youhave a bad day and you think,
fuck, today's going to suck.
And then you say, no, today'sgoing to be a great day and I'm
going to give everything I haveto it right.
In real time.
You auto-correct yourself, justlike when you're typing on a
computer, and it auto-correctsthe word.
When you're talking out loud orthinking in your head, you have
(00:45):
to auto-correct the thoughtsthat you have.
(01:08):
Welcome to Entitled to Nothingwhere we believe our life is our
fault.
My name is Mink and I startedthis podcast because I want to
share everything I've learned onmy journey to help inspire you
on yours.
Today, I want to talk to youguys about the words that we use
.
One of the things I've come tobelieve is that the language and
(01:31):
the words that we use shapesour reality, and it's something
that's so simple but also soprofound.
I think the way that we speakis a frame, or it creates our
perception, and that perceptionstarts to skew the way that we
see things and the way that webelieve in what we think, and,
ultimately, the words and thethoughts that we have are going
to end up creating the realitythat we experience, and so what
(01:52):
I want to do is read a shortpassage from the book the four
agreements.
It's all about the words thatwe use and how powerful they are
, and then I want to share withyou some reframes on language,
because oftentimes we fall intothe trap of using words that
they assume or presuppose thatwe're a victim, like.
(02:12):
I'll give you one example Doyou get to do it or do you have
to do it?
Because if you have to do it,then you're a victim of that
situation.
If you get to do it, well, nowthat reframe is giving you the
power to say no, I get to dothis, and it might be something
that you get to do that youdon't want to do that you don't
(02:32):
like to do, but simply bytelling yourself I get to do
this, it's going to change yourperspective on what it means,
how it feels and ultimately,it's going to start conditioning
you to be the creator ofcircumstance, to take the power
back instead of giving it away.
You see, I think one of thebiggest problems that we have
and I I experienced thisfirsthand for a long time is we
(02:55):
fall, we, we, we fall into thetrap of being, uh, the victim in
certain situations, and to somedegree we will be, regardless
of how we approach this.
But if we bring awareness to it, if we bring intention to it
and specifically, intention tothe words that we use, I believe
(03:15):
we can start to change the waythat we perceive things and
ultimately, that's going to giveus more control, more power,
and that creates moreopportunity for us to create
life on our terms.
I can tell you guys this when Istarted being very, very
intentional about the words thatI used and how I languaged
things, that started to changethe way that I felt.
(03:35):
And ultimately, we don'texperience the life that we have
.
We experience the life that wefeel and what we focus on.
And so, with that said, I'mgoing to read to you guys from
the four agreements, because Iabsolutely love what the author,
don Miguel, says here about thepower of words, and it's super,
super relevant to what we'regoing through here today.
(03:58):
So he says the word is the powerthat you have to create.
Through the word, you expressyour creative power.
It's what manifests everything,regardless of what language you
speak.
Your intent through the wordcreates your dreams or destroys
it.
The word is the most powerfultool a human has.
(04:19):
It's a tool of magic, but likea sword with two edges, your
word can create the mostbeautiful dream or your word can
destroy everything around you.
If you use, if you misuse theword, it creates a living hell.
So this idea that our thoughtsbecome things, our words become
(04:41):
reality, right?
I?
I wholeheartedly believe thisand I believe that if together
we start to bring as muchintention to the way that we
speak about things we're goingto have, we're going to feel
better and we're going to createmore.
So today I'm going to give youguys 12 different language
patterns, and these are justthings to think about.
When stuff comes out of yourmouth, the best thing that we
(05:04):
can do is try to bring awarenessto it and reflect on it.
So I'll give you guys a simpleexample.
Number one never say you can'tdo something, say you haven't
done it yet, or maybe say youchoose not to do it, but never,
ever say you can't do something.
And here's the deal.
Like, yeah, we can't fuckingfly.
All right, we know that, right,uh, but you could get on a
(05:26):
plane and then you can't fly,right.
So there's exceptions to everyrule to some degree, but it's
all about how we frame thingsand I would say, the way that
you frame something.
So what, what does framing mean?
It's basically like, if youthink about a picture frame,
right, like you are setting theframe of what you can see in
(05:48):
that picture.
So if you've got a pictureframe that's too small, you
can't see the picture, or thewrong size, the picture doesn't
fit.
Every day we're framingeverything in our life and the
way that we frame something isultimately the perspective that
we're taking on that situation.
You know, a simple example I'veused and we've all felt is this
you wake up in, you're tired,you don't feel like doing it,
(06:12):
your body hurts, it's early andthere's nothing inside of you
that wants to get up and youthink to yourself today's going
to fucking suck.
Right, I've done that moretimes than I like to admit.
But then, after realizing thatthose words, or maybe those
thoughts, come out, we have theopportunity to correct them and
say you know what?
(06:32):
Today's going to be a tough day, but it's the tough days that
make me stronger.
Right, I'm going to give todayeverything I have, and that's
going to be enough.
And oftentimes, just the waythat we frame our days, our
moments, our relationships,those start to predict and
create the way that we're goingto experience them.
I'll give you another simpleexample.
(06:53):
Let's say you got a reallyshitty meeting that you have to
have, right.
Not that long ago, I had to gothrough the experience of
letting a few people at mycompany go, and that's one of
the worst things to do as aleader.
And rather than saying fuck,today's going to suck, I have to
let these people go.
I thought to myself today'sgoing to be tough, but it's
(07:15):
going to make me stronger as aleader.
I'm going to have theopportunity to learn in this
moment.
I'm going to have theopportunity to grow through this
moment.
So the way that we frame thingsultimately is going to start to
build the experience that wehave in the moment.
And this leads me to anotherframing way or another way to
think about things.
(07:36):
Right, you could say I'm goingto go through it or I'm going to
grow through it.
Right, if we're going throughit, it is ultimately just
something that we have to, youknow, figure out.
We have to go through.
But if we grow through it, well, now we're looking for
opportunities to learn lessonsalong the way.
We're looking for ways that,because of this experience, I'm
(07:59):
going to be a better version ofmyself.
You can go through it or youcan grow through it.
Right, very simple languagepattern shift.
But if you start growingthrough things now moment to
moment to moment, or difficultconversation to difficult
conversation you're now gettingstronger because you're growing
instead of just going through it.
(08:20):
We already talked about thisone, but one language pattern
you have to use is, instead ofsaying, I have to do it, you get
to do it right.
And what you'll notice here isa lot of these language patterns
that we have today's going tobe a bad day.
I have to go through this, Ihave to do this.
These are all language patternsthat are taking your power away
(08:43):
.
You are powerless if you haveto do something, but you're in
power if you get to do something, and so much of life is setting
a frame that gives you control,so that you're in the best
position you can to createchange or to create momentum or
movement, right?
So if we want to create life onour terms, it truly starts with
(09:08):
the words that come out of ourmouth, right?
Another one number four is youcan say I failed Right, or I
learned right.
For every failure there's alesson and I was thinking about
this one as I was driving in andoftentimes the reason why you
would fail is because you doless than what you were wanting
(09:29):
to do, and less is thefoundation of less.
Less in right.
So, again, just some of thesereframes right, we hear the word
impossible, but it's also, I'mpossible, and I know these
things are like little clichethings, but these are the small
(09:50):
hinges that swing big doors ofopportunity and possibility.
If we can agree that thegreatest power we have is the
word right, the word to createor destroy power we have is the
word right, the word to createor destroy, then the way that we
use that word, the sword of ourword, it has two edges, like
the four agreement says, andit's up to us to use that sword
(10:12):
to create, and if we don't useit intentionally to create,
we're going to unintentionallyuse it to destroy, most likely.
And I think that the mostpowerful thing we can do as
leaders and as men who want totake control of our circumstance
is to first take control of ourlanguage.
(10:33):
Number five this is aninteresting one.
If you've ever found yourselfsaying I can't afford this,
right, that's a verydisempowering feeling.
We've all been there.
We've all felt at times like wecan't afford it or we can't do
what we want to do.
So how do you reframe this?
How do you make it from adisempowering language pattern
to an empowering one?
Well, maybe you say I don'thave this in my budget right now
(10:56):
, or I'm prioritizing otherthings at the moment.
This isn't a priority in mylife, right, I can't afford this
as a negative experience.
It makes you feel less than itmight be true.
But you could just as easilysay I'm not budgeting for this
right now, which is also true,right?
And you know one of the thingsthat's interesting, right, we
(11:17):
live in this world where peopleplay word games, and this is
never more prevalent than inpolitics and, quite honestly, it
drives me insane, becausethey're manipulating language
against us and they'reredefining things and creating
semantics.
But it's such a beautifullesson if you can observe it
(11:37):
right, because people aremanipulating, are using language
to change perception, and youcan do the same thing in your
own life for yourself, to giveyourself the power that you need
to move through the moment.
And so often in my life I feltbroke and like I couldn't afford
what I wanted to do and byfeeling that, by expressing that
(12:00):
, it made me feel less than ittook my power away.
And then it's very easy to getin this negative spiral.
So by just saying you know what?
I can't afford this right now,I'm not prioritizing this right
now, you start to at least sayI'm in charge of this and I'm
not focusing on this right now.
True or not?
Honestly, it doesn't fuckingmatter.
The stories that you tellyourself, they don't have to be
(12:21):
true, they just have to supportyou and move you in the right
direction, all right.
Another example of this issaying I should do this versus I
will do this right.
So often we get caught in thetrap of I should, I should, I
should, and then we end up justshooting all over ourselves.
Right, but if something isreally a priority, you will not
(12:42):
say I should do it.
You'll you say I will do it,and if it's not a priority, then
just let it go.
But don't should all overyourself say I must do this or I
will do this because shouldsultimately never fucking happen.
As you and I know, we got somany competing things in our
lives, we don't have time for it.
Another language pattern is Idon't have time, which a lot of
(13:04):
us.
Right, we are busy, we don'thave time to do some of the
things that we want.
But when we say we don't havetime, it makes us feel like we
are well, I think again it makesus feel like we're not able to
do the things that we want to do, and that, again, is simply a
feeling of being a victim or nothaving enough right.
(13:26):
So if we say I'm not makingthis a priority right now, again
you're changing the focus frombeing a victim of this moment of
having lack or scarcity to thisisn't a priority right now.
I'm not focusing on this, okay,giving you the opportunity to
take control of the situationagain, right or wrong.
Now you can move forward.
Another one is saying I'm notgood at this, too, I'm getting
(13:47):
better at this, because none ofus are good at anything.
Until we practice and learn howto get better.
Okay.
So by saying, oh, I'm not goodat this, I suck at this, I can't
do that, you're automaticallyputting yourself in a position
where you never will be able to.
But if you say I'm gettingbetter at this, no one can argue
that.
And if you actually are puttingin some effort to try to do it,
(14:08):
you're going to get better.
So stop saying I'm not good atthis or I can't do this, or the
one that I hate the most Well,I'm just not that kind of person
.
Well, if you want to create theresult that you want, become
that type of person like buildthe motherfucker you want to be,
so you can go do the shit thatyou want to do, right.
But if you get caught in thisnegative language pattern of I'm
(14:28):
not good enough or I can't doit, then ultimately you never
will right your words, createyour reality, so flip that shit.
You're in control of it.
This is why I say your life isyour fault, because you're in
control of the words that comeout of your mouth and the words
lead to feeling, and feelingleads to action.
Okay, so you're getting betterat this.
(14:49):
Another one that you hear islike man, this is hard, I don't
know if I can do this.
And that's good, because growthand strength doesn't come from
easy.
So, rather than saying it's toohard, say I'm getting stronger,
I'm going to grow through this.
Right, I'm going to embracethis again and look for a way
that you can reframe things,change the words that you are
(15:12):
using so that they are nowempowering you instead of
disempowering you, right?
Another one is I have a problem.
I think you can change that to.
I have a really interestingopportunity, right?
Or you know what?
I have these obstacles that I'mgoing to overcome, right, you
don't have a problem.
You have an obstacle toovercome.
You have a worthy opponent thathas been presented to you that
(15:36):
you get to grow through andovercome, making you stronger.
Okay, just simply, by puttingsome of these together, you are
now playing mental jujitsu and,rather than being a bitch and a
whiner and a victim, you becomethe victor and someone that has
the opportunity to use whatevercomes your way for growth, but
(15:56):
it starts with the words thatyou use.
Another one is I have to wait todo this.
I can't do this right now.
Two, you could change that to.
Well, I'm practicing patience.
I'm being disciplined.
I'm working on a plan.
Right, I can't do it right now.
I don't have the time.
I'm building a plan.
(16:17):
I'm practicing patience.
I'm following a strategy that Iput out for myself.
Right, there's all these waysthat we can change the way that
we define something and make itmean something better for us.
And then the final one is simplyyou never have a bad day.
You just have a growth day,right?
We're all going to have toughdays.
(16:38):
Shit's going to go wrong,things are going to break.
This just happened to me acouple days ago.
I was on a flight.
I had multiple scheduledflights, I wasn't able to get
where I was going, I had tocancel a trip, it was a whole
lot of fuckery and at the end ofthe day, it wasn't a bad day.
It was a growth day, and if wecan see things as opportunities
(17:02):
for us to learn and grow, if wecan reframe our language, then
ultimately we are always goingto be in control of our
circumstances.
On this topic, one of myfavorite quotes is from Rudyard
Kipling I don't even know how tosay his name, rudyard, rudyard,
rudyard Kipling, okay and hesays words are the most common
used drug of humans.
We hypnotize ourselves withwords, we lie to ourselves with
(17:24):
words, we hold ourselves back,we discourage ourself with words
.
And, ultimately, I wanted toshare some of these language
patterns with you and talk aboutthe power of the word, because
each of us have it and I believeit's the most powerful thing
that we have.
Because each of us have it andI believe it's the most powerful
thing that we have and with itwe can create and build a life
(17:46):
of our dreams, or we can createand destroy a life that could be
really beautiful.
Again, you don't have the lifeyou want.
You have the life you focus on.
You don't live the life thatyou want.
You live the life that you talkabout.
And so, all of this to be said,if you can bring more intention,
more awareness around the wordsthat you're saying, you're
(18:09):
going to create way moreabundance, experience and value
for yourself in life.
And here's the thing when youfirst start to do this, it's not
going to come natural.
It's something that you have towork at.
Like anything, this is a muscleyou have to build, and I've
built this muscle by beingintentional and practicing.
(18:29):
So again, you wake up and youhave a bad day and you think,
fuck, today's going to suck.
And then you say, no, today'sgoing to be a great day and I'm
going to give everything I haveto it right.
In real time, you auto-correctyourself, just like when you're
typing on a computer and itauto-corrects the word.
When you're talking out loud orthinking in your head, you have
to auto-correct the thoughtsthat you have, and if you can
(18:49):
learn to auto-correct yourlanguage and your thoughts and
reframe them to something thatserves you and empowers you,
then you're going to be able tohave a lot more success and
you're going to experience amuch higher quality of life.
I appreciate you guys hangingout with me today.
Let me know if you found thisepisode helpful.
(19:09):
Okay, it's a little bit of a uh, it's.
It's a different type ofepisode, right?
We're talking about the wordsthat we use and we're trying to
auto-correct them in real time.
It's an interesting concept tothink about, but I really
believe that this idea of beingintentional about the words that
we use and then creating thismuscle of auto-correcting the
(19:31):
language that I use and thethoughts that I have.
That has played a massive rolein me building the companies and
doing the things that I've done, and I want you guys to have
the opportunity to do the samething.
So if you got value from thisepisode, drop us a comment below
, let us know.
Share it with someone thatneeds to hear it.
Until next time, I'll talk toyou guys soon.
if you can bring more intention, more awareness
around the words that you'resaying, you're going to create
way more abundance, experienceand value for yourself in life.
You know, and here's the thing,when you first start to do this
, it's not going to come natural.
It's something that you have towork at.
Like anything, this is a muscleyou have to build, and I've
(00:24):
built this muscle by beingintentional and practicing.
So, anything this is a muscleyou have to build, and I've
built this muscle by beingintentional and practicing.
So again, you wake up and youhave a bad day and you think,
fuck, today's going to suck.
And then you say, no, today'sgoing to be a great day and I'm
going to give everything I haveto it right.
In real time.
You auto-correct yourself, justlike when you're typing on a
computer, and it auto-correctsthe word.
When you're talking out loud orthinking in your head, you have
(00:45):
to auto-correct the thoughtsthat you have.
(01:08):
Welcome to Entitled to Nothingwhere we believe our life is our
fault.
My name is Mink and I startedthis podcast because I want to
share everything I've learned onmy journey to help inspire you
on yours.
Today, I want to talk to youguys about the words that we use
.
One of the things I've come tobelieve is that the language and
(01:31):
the words that we use shapesour reality, and it's something
that's so simple but also soprofound.
I think the way that we speakis a frame, or it creates our
perception, and that perceptionstarts to skew the way that we
see things and the way that webelieve in what we think, and,
ultimately, the words and thethoughts that we have are going
to end up creating the realitythat we experience, and so what
(01:52):
I want to do is read a shortpassage from the book the four
agreements.
It's all about the words thatwe use and how powerful they are
, and then I want to share withyou some reframes on language,
because oftentimes we fall intothe trap of using words that
they assume or presuppose thatwe're a victim, like.
(02:12):
I'll give you one example Doyou get to do it or do you have
to do it?
Because if you have to do it,then you're a victim of that
situation.
If you get to do it, well, nowthat reframe is giving you the
power to say no, I get to dothis, and it might be something
that you get to do that youdon't want to do that you don't
(02:32):
like to do, but simply bytelling yourself I get to do
this, it's going to change yourperspective on what it means,
how it feels and ultimately,it's going to start conditioning
you to be the creator ofcircumstance, to take the power
back instead of giving it away.
You see, I think one of thebiggest problems that we have
and I I experienced thisfirsthand for a long time is we
(02:55):
fall, we, we, we fall into thetrap of being, uh, the victim in
certain situations, and to somedegree we will be, regardless
of how we approach this.
But if we bring awareness to it, if we bring intention to it
and specifically, intention tothe words that we use, I believe
(03:15):
we can start to change the waythat we perceive things and
ultimately, that's going to giveus more control, more power,
and that creates moreopportunity for us to create
life on our terms.
I can tell you guys this when Istarted being very, very
intentional about the words thatI used and how I languaged
things, that started to changethe way that I felt.
(03:35):
And ultimately, we don'texperience the life that we have
.
We experience the life that wefeel and what we focus on.
And so, with that said, I'mgoing to read to you guys from
the four agreements, because Iabsolutely love what the author,
don Miguel, says here about thepower of words, and it's super,
super relevant to what we'regoing through here today.
(03:58):
So he says the word is the powerthat you have to create.
Through the word, you expressyour creative power.
It's what manifests everything,regardless of what language you
speak.
Your intent through the wordcreates your dreams or destroys
it.
The word is the most powerfultool a human has.
(04:19):
It's a tool of magic, but likea sword with two edges, your
word can create the mostbeautiful dream or your word can
destroy everything around you.
If you use, if you misuse theword, it creates a living hell.
So this idea that our thoughtsbecome things, our words become
(04:41):
reality, right?
I?
I wholeheartedly believe thisand I believe that if together
we start to bring as muchintention to the way that we
speak about things we're goingto have, we're going to feel
better and we're going to createmore.
So today I'm going to give youguys 12 different language
patterns, and these are justthings to think about.
When stuff comes out of yourmouth, the best thing that we
(05:04):
can do is try to bring awarenessto it and reflect on it.
So I'll give you guys a simpleexample.
Number one never say you can'tdo something, say you haven't
done it yet, or maybe say youchoose not to do it, but never,
ever say you can't do something.
And here's the deal.
Like, yeah, we can't fuckingfly.
All right, we know that, right,uh, but you could get on a
(05:26):
plane and then you can't fly,right.
So there's exceptions to everyrule to some degree, but it's
all about how we frame thingsand I would say, the way that
you frame something.
So what, what does framing mean?
It's basically like, if youthink about a picture frame,
right, like you are setting theframe of what you can see in
(05:48):
that picture.
So if you've got a pictureframe that's too small, you
can't see the picture, or thewrong size, the picture doesn't
fit.
Every day we're framingeverything in our life and the
way that we frame something isultimately the perspective that
we're taking on that situation.
You know, a simple example I'veused and we've all felt is this
you wake up in, you're tired,you don't feel like doing it,
(06:12):
your body hurts, it's early andthere's nothing inside of you
that wants to get up and youthink to yourself today's going
to fucking suck.
Right, I've done that moretimes than I like to admit.
But then, after realizing thatthose words, or maybe those
thoughts, come out, we have theopportunity to correct them and
say you know what?
(06:32):
Today's going to be a tough day, but it's the tough days that
make me stronger.
Right, I'm going to give todayeverything I have, and that's
going to be enough.
And oftentimes, just the waythat we frame our days, our
moments, our relationships,those start to predict and
create the way that we're goingto experience them.
I'll give you another simpleexample.
(06:53):
Let's say you got a reallyshitty meeting that you have to
have, right.
Not that long ago, I had to gothrough the experience of
letting a few people at mycompany go, and that's one of
the worst things to do as aleader.
And rather than saying fuck,today's going to suck, I have to
let these people go.
I thought to myself today'sgoing to be tough, but it's
(07:15):
going to make me stronger as aleader.
I'm going to have theopportunity to learn in this
moment.
I'm going to have theopportunity to grow through this
moment.
So the way that we frame thingsultimately is going to start to
build the experience that wehave in the moment.
And this leads me to anotherframing way or another way to
think about things.
(07:36):
Right, you could say I'm goingto go through it or I'm going to
grow through it.
Right, if we're going throughit, it is ultimately just
something that we have to, youknow, figure out.
We have to go through.
But if we grow through it, well, now we're looking for
opportunities to learn lessonsalong the way.
We're looking for ways that,because of this experience, I'm
(07:59):
going to be a better version ofmyself.
You can go through it or youcan grow through it.
Right, very simple languagepattern shift.
But if you start growingthrough things now moment to
moment to moment, or difficultconversation to difficult
conversation you're now gettingstronger because you're growing
instead of just going through it.
(08:20):
We already talked about thisone, but one language pattern
you have to use is, instead ofsaying, I have to do it, you get
to do it right.
And what you'll notice here isa lot of these language patterns
that we have today's going tobe a bad day.
I have to go through this, Ihave to do this.
These are all language patternsthat are taking your power away
(08:43):
.
You are powerless if you haveto do something, but you're in
power if you get to do something, and so much of life is setting
a frame that gives you control,so that you're in the best
position you can to createchange or to create momentum or
movement, right?
So if we want to create life onour terms, it truly starts with
(09:08):
the words that come out of ourmouth, right?
Another one number four is youcan say I failed Right, or I
learned right.
For every failure there's alesson and I was thinking about
this one as I was driving in andoftentimes the reason why you
would fail is because you doless than what you were wanting
(09:29):
to do, and less is thefoundation of less.
Less in right.
So, again, just some of thesereframes right, we hear the word
impossible, but it's also, I'mpossible, and I know these
things are like little clichethings, but these are the small
(09:50):
hinges that swing big doors ofopportunity and possibility.
If we can agree that thegreatest power we have is the
word right, the word to createor destroy power we have is the
word right, the word to createor destroy, then the way that we
use that word, the sword of ourword, it has two edges, like
the four agreement says, andit's up to us to use that sword
(10:12):
to create, and if we don't useit intentionally to create,
we're going to unintentionallyuse it to destroy, most likely.
And I think that the mostpowerful thing we can do as
leaders and as men who want totake control of our circumstance
is to first take control of ourlanguage.
(10:33):
Number five this is aninteresting one.
If you've ever found yourselfsaying I can't afford this,
right, that's a verydisempowering feeling.
We've all been there.
We've all felt at times like wecan't afford it or we can't do
what we want to do.
So how do you reframe this?
How do you make it from adisempowering language pattern
to an empowering one?
Well, maybe you say I don'thave this in my budget right now
(10:56):
, or I'm prioritizing otherthings at the moment.
This isn't a priority in mylife, right, I can't afford this
as a negative experience.
It makes you feel less than itmight be true.
But you could just as easilysay I'm not budgeting for this
right now, which is also true,right?
And you know one of the thingsthat's interesting, right, we
(11:17):
live in this world where peopleplay word games, and this is
never more prevalent than inpolitics and, quite honestly, it
drives me insane, becausethey're manipulating language
against us and they'reredefining things and creating
semantics.
But it's such a beautifullesson if you can observe it
(11:37):
right, because people aremanipulating, are using language
to change perception, and youcan do the same thing in your
own life for yourself, to giveyourself the power that you need
to move through the moment.
And so often in my life I feltbroke and like I couldn't afford
what I wanted to do and byfeeling that, by expressing that
(12:00):
, it made me feel less than ittook my power away.
And then it's very easy to getin this negative spiral.
So by just saying you know what?
I can't afford this right now,I'm not prioritizing this right
now, you start to at least sayI'm in charge of this and I'm
not focusing on this right now.
True or not?
Honestly, it doesn't fuckingmatter.
The stories that you tellyourself, they don't have to be
(12:21):
true, they just have to supportyou and move you in the right
direction, all right.
Another example of this issaying I should do this versus I
will do this right.
So often we get caught in thetrap of I should, I should, I
should, and then we end up justshooting all over ourselves.
Right, but if something isreally a priority, you will not
(12:42):
say I should do it.
You'll you say I will do it,and if it's not a priority, then
just let it go.
But don't should all overyourself say I must do this or I
will do this because shouldsultimately never fucking happen.
As you and I know, we got somany competing things in our
lives, we don't have time for it.
Another language pattern is Idon't have time, which a lot of
(13:04):
us.
Right, we are busy, we don'thave time to do some of the
things that we want.
But when we say we don't havetime, it makes us feel like we
are well, I think again it makesus feel like we're not able to
do the things that we want to do, and that, again, is simply a
feeling of being a victim or nothaving enough right.
(13:26):
So if we say I'm not makingthis a priority right now, again
you're changing the focus frombeing a victim of this moment of
having lack or scarcity to thisisn't a priority right now.
I'm not focusing on this, okay,giving you the opportunity to
take control of the situationagain, right or wrong.
Now you can move forward.
Another one is saying I'm notgood at this, too, I'm getting
(13:47):
better at this, because none ofus are good at anything.
Until we practice and learn howto get better.
Okay.
So by saying, oh, I'm not goodat this, I suck at this, I can't
do that, you're automaticallyputting yourself in a position
where you never will be able to.
But if you say I'm gettingbetter at this, no one can argue
that.
And if you actually are puttingin some effort to try to do it,
(14:08):
you're going to get better.
So stop saying I'm not good atthis or I can't do this, or the
one that I hate the most Well,I'm just not that kind of person
.
Well, if you want to create theresult that you want, become
that type of person like buildthe motherfucker you want to be,
so you can go do the shit thatyou want to do, right.
But if you get caught in thisnegative language pattern of I'm
(14:28):
not good enough or I can't doit, then ultimately you never
will right your words, createyour reality, so flip that shit.
You're in control of it.
This is why I say your life isyour fault, because you're in
control of the words that comeout of your mouth and the words
lead to feeling, and feelingleads to action.
Okay, so you're getting betterat this.
(14:49):
Another one that you hear islike man, this is hard, I don't
know if I can do this.
And that's good, because growthand strength doesn't come from
easy.
So, rather than saying it's toohard, say I'm getting stronger,
I'm going to grow through this.
Right, I'm going to embracethis again and look for a way
that you can reframe things,change the words that you are
(15:12):
using so that they are nowempowering you instead of
disempowering you, right?
Another one is I have a problem.
I think you can change that to.
I have a really interestingopportunity, right?
Or you know what?
I have these obstacles that I'mgoing to overcome, right, you
don't have a problem.
You have an obstacle toovercome.
You have a worthy opponent thathas been presented to you that
(15:36):
you get to grow through andovercome, making you stronger.
Okay, just simply, by puttingsome of these together, you are
now playing mental jujitsu and,rather than being a bitch and a
whiner and a victim, you becomethe victor and someone that has
the opportunity to use whatevercomes your way for growth, but
(15:56):
it starts with the words thatyou use.
Another one is I have to wait todo this.
I can't do this right now.
Two, you could change that to.
Well, I'm practicing patience.
I'm being disciplined.
I'm working on a plan.
Right, I can't do it right now.
I don't have the time.
I'm building a plan.
(16:17):
I'm practicing patience.
I'm following a strategy that Iput out for myself.
Right, there's all these waysthat we can change the way that
we define something and make itmean something better for us.
And then the final one is simplyyou never have a bad day.
You just have a growth day,right?
We're all going to have toughdays.
(16:38):
Shit's going to go wrong,things are going to break.
This just happened to me acouple days ago.
I was on a flight.
I had multiple scheduledflights, I wasn't able to get
where I was going, I had tocancel a trip, it was a whole
lot of fuckery and at the end ofthe day, it wasn't a bad day.
It was a growth day, and if wecan see things as opportunities
(17:02):
for us to learn and grow, if wecan reframe our language, then
ultimately we are always goingto be in control of our
circumstances.
On this topic, one of myfavorite quotes is from Rudyard
Kipling I don't even know how tosay his name, rudyard, rudyard,
rudyard Kipling, okay and hesays words are the most common
used drug of humans.
We hypnotize ourselves withwords, we lie to ourselves with
(17:24):
words, we hold ourselves back,we discourage ourself with words
.
And, ultimately, I wanted toshare some of these language
patterns with you and talk aboutthe power of the word, because
each of us have it and I believeit's the most powerful thing
that we have.
Because each of us have it andI believe it's the most powerful
thing that we have and with itwe can create and build a life
(17:46):
of our dreams, or we can createand destroy a life that could be
really beautiful.
Again, you don't have the lifeyou want.
You have the life you focus on.
You don't live the life thatyou want.
You live the life that you talkabout.
And so, all of this to be said,if you can bring more intention,
more awareness around the wordsthat you're saying, you're
(18:09):
going to create way moreabundance, experience and value
for yourself in life.
And here's the thing when youfirst start to do this, it's not
going to come natural.
It's something that you have towork at.
Like anything, this is a muscleyou have to build, and I've
built this muscle by beingintentional and practicing.
(18:29):
So again, you wake up and youhave a bad day and you think,
fuck, today's going to suck.
And then you say, no, today'sgoing to be a great day and I'm
going to give everything I haveto it right.
In real time, you auto-correctyourself, just like when you're
typing on a computer and itauto-corrects the word.
When you're talking out loud orthinking in your head, you have
to auto-correct the thoughtsthat you have, and if you can
(18:49):
learn to auto-correct yourlanguage and your thoughts and
reframe them to something thatserves you and empowers you,
then you're going to be able tohave a lot more success and
you're going to experience amuch higher quality of life.
I appreciate you guys hangingout with me today.
Let me know if you found thisepisode helpful.
(19:09):
Okay, it's a little bit of a uh, it's.
It's a different type ofepisode, right?
We're talking about the wordsthat we use and we're trying to
auto-correct them in real time.
It's an interesting concept tothink about, but I really
believe that this idea of beingintentional about the words that
we use and then creating thismuscle of auto-correcting the
(19:31):
language that I use and thethoughts that I have.
That has played a massive rolein me building the companies and
doing the things that I've done, and I want you guys to have
the opportunity to do the samething.
So if you got value from thisepisode, drop us a comment below
, let us know.
Share it with someone thatneeds to hear it.
Until next time, I'll talk toyou guys soon.
Popular Podcasts
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.