July 1, 2025 • 47 mins
Where is God when life hurts? Myshel Wilkins knows that pain personally—she and her husband walked through years of infertility and eight heartbreaking miscarriages. On the next Equipped, she opens up about wrestling with disappointment and how she rediscovered God's strength and goodness in the middle of deep sorrow. If you're feeling discouraged or need hope for your own journey, don't miss this powerful conversation on Equipped!
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Arise, Shine, and Conquer: 40 Days of Courage for Women
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
S1 (00:19):
Well. Hey there friends, welcome to another exciting edition of
equip with Chris Brooks! I'm so thrilled that you've joined
us today. Do me a favor strap on your seat
belt as we navigate through the contours of culture, as
always with the lens of the biblical worldview on. But
before we do that, let me remind you, this is
the day that the Lord has made. He is giving
(00:40):
it as a gift so that you and I can
rejoice and be glad in it. So let's do just that.
Let's follow the words of the Apostle Paul. Let's rejoice
in the Lord always. And again I say, rejoice. Today
I want you to help me welcome my good friend
Roy Patterson to the host seat. Roy is a man
of God who has ministered through radio and the pastorate
(01:00):
for decades. He's the host and originator of the Urban
Praise streaming channel, and also host Celebration of Praise and
Music for Sunday here on Moody Radio. Roy, thank you
for leading this edition of equip.
S2 (01:17):
I'm so excited to be with you today. Chris Brooks
is one of my favorite people on the planet. We
certainly are praying for him and his beautiful wife, Jody,
and just their whole family. Just good people. They love
Jesus and they love you. And Chris often speaks of
you guys and he misses being here. But make it
a point to keep him in your prayers and know
(01:38):
that he will return as soon as possible. Well, I'm
enjoying this day that the Lord has made, and we've
had a lot of heat in our country. And you
know what? We've got to persevere. We wanted it warm
when it was cold and we wanted cold when it's hot.
And yet God is faithful, isn't he? So we're praying
(01:58):
for those of you who are facing, uh, adverse heat.
Super heat. Uh, please find a way to stay cool
and look out for your neighbors. Will you do that?
All right, well, today we've got a special show. We've
got my show. Wilkins with us. She's originally from Frankfort, Kentucky,
and she traveled with her missionary dad and Ghanaian mom
(02:18):
to various countries, speaking and leading worship from an early age.
After graduating, she moved to Nashville, Tennessee and became a
Christian musician. Michelle and her husband Michael now live in Dallas,
Texas and currently attend Upper Room Ministries. Was thrilled to
have my share with us today. Sister, how are you?
S3 (02:41):
I'm wonderful. Thank you for allowing me to be here
with you all today.
S2 (02:44):
Oh, it's really a thrill. I always enjoy having folks
who sing, I love creatives, I love what God is
doing in the lives of his people. You know, my show,
we serve a creative God, don't we?
S3 (02:57):
Oh, yes we do. Absolutely.
S2 (02:59):
And he is able to do what we can not
even imagine. All right, so I noted that you are
an author. Uh, and you're a musician. How did you
get involved in singing?
S3 (03:11):
Well, you know, I've been doing it for a while
since I was little. With my dad. We would go
to different countries and he would have me lead worship,
and so that's where I got the nerves out of
me so that I could stand on a stage and,
and and sing to the glory of God in a room, uh,
and watch the Lord just love on his people. And
so that was the beginning of it. And then God
was so kind that, you know, I've always wanted to
(03:33):
be a singer. And it's cute when you say that
when you're 7 or 8. But, boy, when you're like
in your 20s and you're still saying you want to
be a singer, people are like, oh, she doesn't know
what she wants to be like. That's you need to
be a doctor or whatever.
S2 (03:42):
Whatever. Right, right.
S3 (03:43):
God's so good. He opened the door. Mandisa. The late Mandisa. Yeah.
We became friends and she went on American Idol and
she asked if I wanted to sing background with her.
When she got her record deal in Nashville, I said yep.
And then I started touring the country with her. And
then other artist opportunities opened up as well.
S2 (04:00):
It's amazing what God does through music.
S3 (04:03):
So I'm telling.
S2 (04:04):
You. So as a as a kid, I mean, did
you start singing when you were 7 or 8 years old?
S3 (04:08):
I did my first talent show was at five years
old in front of my entire school. Yeah.
S2 (04:14):
Wow.
S3 (04:14):
So I fell in love with it. Then I was like,
I love this, I love singing, I love, I love
having the room. It was just it was just wonderful.
S2 (04:22):
When it when it comes to music, I can tell
for you it's not just notes, it's not just song leading.
It really is entering into the presence of God. Uh,
do you remember the age where it really hit you?
This is more than just something that's fun. It's more
than a talent show. This is something I can do
to the glory and honor of God.
S3 (04:40):
Yes, I was in South America, and I remember singing
a song that in English, however, I saw the power
of God transcend culture, language barriers. I saw the Holy
Spirit rest upon the people so powerfully. And that's when
I realized that this is nothing to be played with.
This is. This is God's hand, uh, on a on
(05:01):
a gift. And and he wants to use it for
his glory. And so, yes, that's when I realized this
is this is something that's powerful. And I want to
make sure that I, I use it for his glory.
S2 (05:11):
Now, I know that you've sung with Mandisa. I understand, uh,
Cece Winans has been a part of your life too.
Is that right?
S3 (05:17):
That's right, that's right. She's been a mentor of mine. Yeah.
S2 (05:21):
And so, uh, talk about that relationship.
S3 (05:24):
Oh, gosh. So I, we had been going to church
in Nashville, the same church for many years, but then
her and her family broke off and started their new church.
And I after a while, I started attending that church.
And next thing you know, they asked if I wanted
to be on staff. And so I said no at
first because honestly, I didn't want to know what was
(05:45):
behind the curtain. You know, I had just come from
a church and there was some, some, um, moral failures there,
and it was very painful. And so I was like,
you know what? I just want to just I just
want to stay right where I am. And then the
Lord made it very clear that's what I needed to do.
And so I said yes to the position and became
one of the leaders in the church and just helping
gather the young people and just training them and and
(06:08):
discipling them. And she discipled me in the process. And
she said, baby girl. She said, the way up is down.
Stay humble, stay humble, stay humble. And I just watched
her walk out. Jesus for real. Behind closed doors in
front of people. She's the real deal. And I just
grew from from her mentorship, her and her husband. And
it was such a gift to us.
S2 (06:30):
So when it comes to music for you, is there
a process either in songwriting or preparing to go in
front of people to lead worship? Do you sort of
go through a ritual? What what do you do to
get ready?
S3 (06:44):
Oh, I lay before the Lord. Lord, I have nothing
to give these people. I have a gift. But that's
not enough, I need you, I need you to breathe
on this time. And I want you to love the
people through me. Um. And so I sit with the
Lord for a while. I'll worship just he and I together. Um.
And then, um, I just ask for the Holy Spirit.
I lean on him, and then I go in the
(07:05):
room and. And just the atmosphere of heaven breaks out
in the room for his glory. And that's what you want.
That's what you want.
S2 (07:12):
I love the fact that you're a worshiper that loves
to worship. Um, I think it's difficult when people stand
in front of God's people and it becomes a performance,
or it becomes a form of a demand that says, hey,
you need to reverence my gift. And if I say jump,
you should just say how high? If I say stand,
(07:34):
you should say how long? You know.
S3 (07:36):
Well, I've been there, I've been there, I've been there.
Talk about it. Um, okay. So really quickly. Um, when
I was on the road, uh, you know, with TobyMac,
you know, you've got thousands of people who are applauding you,
and you've got the lights, the cameras, all the things.
And it got to me. It got to me. Uh,
there was a time where, you know, you want to
(07:57):
make sure that you're relevant, stay relevant amongst your peers
and what's coming up next. And you want to be
the star and you want to be. And it began.
It began to cultivate a very self-centered idea of what
a Christian worshipper or artist is, and I got caught
up in that. I'll be honest with you. Yeah, yeah.
And one day, while while praying, a very noble sounding prayer. Lord,
(08:18):
send me to the nations, the Lord made it very
clear to me, you know, Imma send me out. But
what I was really saying is make me a Christian
superstar in your name.
S2 (08:26):
Mhm.
S3 (08:27):
That's what I was saying. And he made it very
clear to me. He said you want the people to
love you, but you have no intentions on loving them back.
And I, I don't need another superstar. I need you
to love the people that put you in front of.
And that was groundbreaking for me. It shook me to
my core, and I. I submitted to the Lord and
I said, Lord, take a wrecking ball and break this
(08:47):
wall that I have erected around myself and and how
I've elevated myself in my own eyes and my desires
are not aligned with yours. Lord, forgive me for my heart, posture,
and I. And that's when the door opened for me
to start working at the church, because God wanted me
to get in the trenches with people, you know and
love people for real. And that's what that's that whole
(09:08):
season of of working with pastor Cece and her family.
That's what that whole time was about, was cultivating a
love for his people so that the next time I
write a song, it's not. It's not to be the
number one hit. It's so that God would pierce hearts.
S2 (09:22):
You know, it has been a concern of mine over
the last couple of weeks that we've gone from seeking
God to seeking trophies, seeking awards. And my prayer is
for those who stand in front of God's people, whether
it's it's music or preaching or whatever it might be.
I'm a preacher. I lead worship as well. And you're
(09:42):
absolutely right. It is a subtle, crazy temptation. And and
I'm I'm determined like you to be what the Lord
would have me to be where he would want me to,
to be at all. Right. So the other other side
of the pendulum. Okay. On one side, it's me, me, me, me, me.
On the other side. It's. I'm down. I'm. I'm disgusting. I'm.
(10:06):
I'm wretched. It's like you've got these these two pendulums.
That's right. And so you got a song called Royal Roar.
What's that song about?
S3 (10:16):
Listen, I don't do that pitiful stuff, uh, because that
gives glory to the enemy. That's not how God created me.
That's not who I am. I am built to overcome.
S2 (10:27):
Amen.
S3 (10:28):
Right? Yeah, I'm built to overcome. I love the stance
that David had when he looked at the giant in
front of him and said, the audacity of you. Do
you know who my God is? Who is this uncircumcised?
You see what I'm saying? He knew who his God was.
He knew who he was. And that's how God wants
us to be. So Royal roar says, lift up your voice.
Know who you are, your true identity, this pitiful stuff
(10:49):
that doesn't work, it has no power in it, and
there's no glory in it for God. Therefore rise up
into your true identity. Walk in your God given authority
and release who God, what God has told you to
release in the earth.
S2 (11:02):
I love that I want to hear a little bit
of that song right now. It's called Royal Roar. I'm
Roy Patterson, sitting in for Chris Brooks. This is equipped.
S4 (11:11):
Can we be honest? Do we really believe that this is.
Just look around us. Can you see what's happening? So
suit up. Put your armor on. We're not fighting flesh
and blood. The time has come. Bring the sound of
(11:35):
a royal roar. Not gonna back down no more I can't,
I really wanna go up. Raise your arm, roar your roar.
Raise the sound of a royal roar. Not gonna back
down no more I can't I really want the war.
Raise your up. Royal roar. If we could only See
(12:00):
things like it does with seeing us all standing next
to us. Step up. There's a place for you. You
were born for this king to move. The time has come.
Bring the sound of a royal rock. Not gonna back
(12:23):
down no more. I don't really want the war. Raise
your rock, Royal rock. Raise the sound of a royal rock.
Not gonna back down no more. I don't really want
the war. Raise your rock. Royal rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
(13:04):
Turn up the heat. We won't retreat. We've had enough.
We're rising up. This is our blood. But victory! Ignite
the fire! Release your power deep in our souls. Until
we know this is our real identity. Turn up the heat.
(13:28):
We won't retreat. We've had enough. Rising up. This is
our blood, our victory. This is the victory! Ignite the fire!
Release your fire deep in our souls. Until we know
this is our real identity. This is our real identity.
(13:50):
This is your true identity. This is your true identity.
This is your Beautiful destiny brings the sound of a
royal road. Like the back down no more. I guess
I really want the war. Raise your arms, Royal rock.
(14:12):
Raise the sound of a royal rock. Not gonna back
down no more. I really want the war. Raise your rock,
Royal rock. I come back down no more. Raise your
(14:32):
arms up. Yeah. I'm gonna back down no more. Yeah.
S2 (14:44):
Well, that's my show. Wilkins. Our guest for today. And man,
what a great, great song. My show. Thank you so
much for being with us. I want you to stick around.
We're going to open up the phone lines and people
can call in at (877)Â 548-3675. That's (877)Â 548-3675. I'm Roy Patterson.
(15:06):
I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks. What a wonderful person
he is. And we're talking to a sister who not
only leads worship, but she knows what what it is
to worship while she's been wounded, going through trials, going
through tribulations. And the Lord brought her out. The Lord
has kept her. The Lord has delivered her. You have
(15:28):
to stick around to hear this story. It's absolutely amazing. Again,
I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks. Thanks
for joining me here on equipped.
S1 (15:47):
Do you have questions about your sexuality that no one
seems to address? Whether it's sexual sin, gender confusion or
issues in your marriage. Surrender Sexuality by Doctor Julie Slattery
has insights you need. She'll help you to see that
God wants to be invited into your questions and struggles.
And when you do, everything changes. Request your copy with
(16:11):
your gift of any amount. To equip, simply call (888)Â 644-4144
or visit Equip Radio Org.
S2 (16:27):
Welcome back to equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson,
thanks so much for being with me. Our guest today
is Michelle Wilkins, gifted singer songwriter, loves Jesus, loves family.
And isn't it interesting that just because you're a follower
of Christ, it does not mean that life will not
(16:47):
hold pain, sorrow, difficulty and my show. You've had your share.
Take us on a journey. You've just like anybody. You
want to have a family. You want there to be
a home that's bursting with kids, running around, etc. but, uh, yeah,
you've had some difficulties along the way. Talk about it.
S3 (17:11):
That's right. So my husband and I were ready to
start a family, and we were really excited about it.
And we got pregnant and we were telling our our
friends and family members, our pastors, of course, Pastor Cissy
and her Aunt Alvin at the time. And we went
to hear the heartbeat. It was a surreal moment. I
couldn't believe a human was growing in this body of mine.
God is amazing. We went back several several weeks later
(17:34):
and the nurse's face drops when she's checking me and
she says, I'm so sorry, sweetheart. We no longer can
find a heartbeat. And I could not understand the words
that came out of her mouth. So I said, I'm sorry,
I don't. I'm not. I'm not following you. She said,
I'm sorry, sweetheart. You've lost your baby. Oh, my. And
my husband collapses on my chest. He starts to weep.
He begs the lady to check one more time, and
(17:56):
we get to the car and I look at the
radio and it's turned all the way down. But I
see the name of the song is called Count It
All Joy. And can I just tell you? I stared
at those words and I fluctuated with frustration and anger.
And who wrote that? Who? What do you mean? Count
it all joy when you go through trials and tribulations. Like,
(18:17):
how can you even say this? And in that moment,
I felt the Lord say, do you want to find out?
And I it was a crossroads moment for me. I
could go into this pit that was saying, God is
not good. Look what he did to you. How could
he allow this? Doesn't the scripture say he he he
doesn't withhold any good thing? And all the things that
were brewing in that pit. And I didn't want to
(18:39):
fall in that pit because I didn't know who I
would become and how long I'd be there.
S2 (18:42):
Right.
S3 (18:43):
Right. And so I so the only option both options
were hard now, but the only option was to turn
to God and say, okay, I'm going to cling to you.
And the only thing I need to do as a
worshipper was to start singing. I began to worship, and
that was the beginning of God showing me how the
enemy works in the midst. He kind of hitchhikes on
the back of our grief if we if we allow
(19:04):
him to. And he that's the door by which he
enters and tries to put a wedge between you and
the Lord. Now here's the thing. You'll still keep going
to church. You'll still keep preaching. You'll still keep going
to those women and men's conferences. But in your heart,
you've taken several steps back and retreated to a place
of of of self-protection and comfort zone, just in case
God disappoints or disappoints again. And so now you're no
(19:26):
longer using your faith full throttle anymore for anything. And
the problem with that is you can't be who God's
called you to be. If you if you reserve your faith,
you can't do what God's called you to do without
taking that risk and stepping out and partnering with him
and the impossible. And so that's what the enemy was after.
He was after my faith that I would not become
who God called me to be. And he would use
(19:46):
this circumstance to make sure that was the case.
S2 (19:49):
We're talking with Michelle Wilkins today. Love for you to
give us a call. The number is 87754836758775483675. And she
certainly can bring a word of comfort and encouragement. Love
for you to call in. (877)Â 548-3675. Michelle I know you
(20:11):
know this song. We bring the sacrifice of praise. How
do you how do you align that song up when
you're going through pain.
S3 (20:20):
Because you don't feel like it? It is a sacrifice.
It's hard. Right? It's hard. Yeah. And. But yet, in
the midst of it all, you make the decision. The
enemy is not going to torment me, but I'm going
to torment him by sitting in this hard moment when
I don't understand and I don't like it. And I'm
going to lift my voice and worship my king in
the midst of this dark moment.
S2 (20:41):
Mm. All right, so this happened not just one time, though, right?
S3 (20:47):
Eight times.
S2 (20:49):
I had a baby. Eight times.
S3 (20:51):
Yes. Eight miscarriages? Yes. And each time the Lord held
my hand and escorted me through each time. And it
was something to behold to see that he is indeed
the treasure and dark places, y'all. I love the Lord
more now than I did before I began to walk
this very difficult, challenging season.
S2 (21:07):
Interesting. Wow. Okay, so so I really need you to
paint a picture because there are people listening right now
who have been in that place that you're talking about.
At first, people are super excited for you and buying clothes, diapers, etc.
by the time you get to the third miscarriage or
(21:29):
the fourth, let alone the eighth. Um, what's what's the temperature? What?
How are people feeling around you? How are you feeling?
S3 (21:36):
I had a moment with the Lord that sustained me.
He didn't have to do this. But let me tell
you what happened, okay? My very first time that I
had a miscarriage. And I started to worship On the
way home, I stayed in my room upstairs. All I
knew to do was just keep singing. I knew that
if I stopped singing, the accusations of God's God not
being good was going to overwhelm me. I was going
(21:57):
to break. So I just kept singing. Six hours later. Wow.
The presence of the Lord filled my house so strongly
that my husband, who was downstairs, comes running to the
banister and says, baby, keep singing. The atmosphere had shifted
so deeply in my house, and I knew His Holiness
had stepped in because I wanted to become one with
the carpet fibers. I couldn't get low enough. His presence
(22:19):
was overwhelming, and I it took my breath away. Yeah.
And in that moment, I realized you are with me.
You see me. You love me. And I thank you
that you came to see about me in this moment.
And every time the doctor would say. No longer a heartbeat,
no longer a heartbeat, I remembered that moment where I
felt the liquid love of God overtake me. And from
(22:41):
that moment I began. The very next day I went
to the grocery. I went to the. I'm sorry, the
the store. And I bought two onesies and I put
them in my closet and I began to I felt
like God said, it's okay for me to contend for
my promise. And I began to say, I can't wait
to hold you. Oh, I can't wait to kiss your
sweet faces. I would pass by the hospital and point
at that hospital and say, I will have my children
(23:03):
in that hospital. And the day that I had my child,
my son, in that hospital, looking at that same road,
I would pass by and point to it. The worship
that came out of me was overwhelming. God is faithful.
S2 (23:14):
God is faithful. God is. God is so faithful. I
know there's someone listening right now. They they're they're in
that place. Whether it's the loss of a child, it's
some other, uh, difficult, difficult circumstance. And they are wondering,
like job, what's up? What's what's what's going on? I'm
(23:37):
living right. I'm going to church. I'm faithful. You know,
they're going down the list.
S3 (23:43):
Yes, I did it. Yeah, I did it, I did.
There was a sense of entitlement that came pouring out
of me that I didn't know was there until after
this moment.
S2 (23:51):
Interesting.
S3 (23:52):
I began to say, I don't deserve this like I
do mission work, I do this, I do that, I
don't deserve this type of trial. And I somehow I
had nurtured the thought that I was too good to
go through something like this. And the Lord was like, sweetheart,
it doesn't work that way. It just doesn't work that way.
And I had to release and submit my right to
(24:13):
be right, my right to be good in my own
eyes and just let the Lord do what he would,
you know, do a work in my heart through this situation.
S2 (24:22):
Um, I'm thinking about Mary and Martha, and you've you've
heard this story, you've sung this story, alabaster box, etc.. Um,
and you know Mary well, first Martha says, if you
had been here, my brother wouldn't have died.
S3 (24:37):
Mhm.
S2 (24:38):
And then when Mary arrives, she says the same thing,
but her posture is Sure is different. That's right. She
is definitely hurting. She's definitely wounded. It's pain. And yet
the tone seems to be different. Um. Talk about what
it's like to worship while you're while you're wounded and
not sort of drift into a la la land, but
(25:00):
to say, hey, this is where I'm at. And yet
I still praise him. Talk about that.
S3 (25:05):
So your heart is broken. Okay. So you're all the
color has left. You're just. You're at the bottom. Okay.
And then you realize all you have is the power
of God. And so what you want to do is
just offer your praise and adoration to him. And that
will strengthen you through it all.
S2 (25:21):
Mm. This is powerful. Hey, I'd love to hear from
you guys. Give me a call at 87754836758775483675. Michelle would
love to interact with you, pray for you, encourage you.
Whatever the season is that you're facing this season, That's difficult.
(25:43):
You're not alone. You are not alone. God is with you.
God still has a purpose and a plan. And even
when you can't trace his hand. The old song says
you can trust his heart. I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting
in for Chris Brooks, my show. Wilkins is our guest today.
You stick around. I'm Roy Patterson, sitting in for Chris
(26:03):
Brooks here on equipped. Welcome back to equipped with Chris
Brooks I'm Roy Patterson. Thanks so much for hanging out
with me. I want to stop and thank God for
(26:27):
you Equippers you are determined to see this ministry go forward.
You see the value in what Chris Brooks brings day
in and day out. And I'm with you. I think
it's so valuable. I think it's so important. So thank
you so much for your financial support and your prayers.
It means the world to us. Hey, do you have
(26:47):
questions about your sexuality that no one seems to address?
Whether it's sexual sin, gender confusion, or issues in your marriage?
Surrendered Sexuality by Doctor Julie Slattery has insights, and they're
the insights that you actually need. She will help you
see that God wants to just do something significant in
(27:09):
your life, and he wants to be invited into your
questions and struggles. And when you do that, I believe
he's going to do something great and mighty. Or maybe
you know someone that's struggling and going through and this
would be a great resource for them. Request your copy
with your gift of any amount to equipped. Call 888644 4144.
(27:31):
That's 888644 4144 or visit equipped radio.org. That's equipped radio.
I'm Roy Patterson. Thanks so much for hanging out with me.
We've got Michelle Wilkins on the line right now, and
we would love for you to give us a call.
Here's the number. (877)Â 548-3675. This is God of Israel.
S4 (27:58):
There is no God.
S5 (28:00):
Like the God of Israel. The. Eternal one, my ever
present help. Your praise goes on forever. Your praise goes
(28:29):
on forever. You are the one who blew off my date. Oh,
yes you do. With faithful love, you meet me face
(28:55):
to face.
S2 (29:00):
It is my show. Wilkins with God of Israel. My show.
I love that song. Did you write that one?
S3 (29:06):
I did not write that song, but I enjoyed singing it.
It was.
S2 (29:09):
Beautiful. Sing it well.
S3 (29:10):
I wish I wrote it.
S2 (29:11):
Yeah. That's okay. Hey, you know, I really believe that
God will give other folks what we need. Amen. He'll
give us what we need to to bless them with
as well. Hey, I love that. Um, so have you
been writing since you were seven, or. This happened when
you became an adult?
S3 (29:27):
Uh, when I became a a scary. Let me try
that again. When I became an adult, I began writing, and, uh. Yeah,
I sat with people who were better than me and
learned from them, and, uh, it was just a blessing.
I love songwriting.
S2 (29:43):
Yeah. God has given you a gift. He really has vocally.
And as far as you know, just writing the songs out.
Let's go back to Mary and Martha for a second. Uh,
I really believe that what happened with them aligns with
your your book. The book is called is it a rise,
shine and conquer? Is that right?
S3 (30:00):
Yes. That's right, that's right.
S2 (30:01):
Yeah. And so I really believe in their situation. They
were as low as they could go. They were down.
They were out. And yet there was something in both
of them that said, I still love Jesus. I still
will follow him. And I wanted him to come and
be my healer. But maybe, just maybe, he's doing something bigger, broader,
(30:24):
better in my life. Uh, take us a little deeper
in your circumstance, because I know you learned a lot
of lessons.
S3 (30:31):
I did. I saw how the enemy would love to
shut me down. And again, you know he steals. He
loves to do that for sure. And so he was
trying to steal, um, my relationship with the Lord, of course,
make me question him, but also cause me to pull
back and not use my faith. And so I realized that,
and I said no. And I began to fight. I
(30:52):
began to fight for what I know the Lord has said.
I'm he's called me to do, called me to be.
And so I arise, shine and conquer is literally what
I had to do. I had to get up and say, Lord,
I choose to believe the words that you have spoken
in your word. I'm not going to question them up
against what my feelings feel like or what things seem
(31:13):
to be. I only know things in part. So I'm
going to submit what I think I know. To what?
To the one who knows all things. And I'm just
going to cling to you, even in the dark, and
know that all things are going to work for my
good in this moment.
S2 (31:26):
Mm. It's interesting that we can fall into a transactional mindset. Yes, absolutely.
I mean, you just you just are living in a
world where, okay, I do this, then God will do that. Oh,
and God has to do this because I've been involved
in this, that and the other. And and it's just science,
you know, one plus one.
S3 (31:46):
That's right, that's right. And we cannot see the Lord
that way. And I had to tell the Lord, if
you never give me a baby, if you never give
me a child, I will not slow my pace in you.
I'm yours and you are mine. I'm not leaving you.
I'm not leaving you. Where can I go? The alternative is. Oh, gosh,
I don't even. Can you imagine? I don't want that.
(32:09):
So even in the middle of not understanding, I'm not
leaving you. Mm.
S2 (32:13):
Wow. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's that's really, really powerful. Um,
I know when my wife and I lost a child, uh, people. Yeah.
It was it was difficult. It was difficult for me,
but really, really difficult for her. And, um, I remember
people rallying around us and loving on us and encouraging us.
(32:34):
Then there are other people that just didn't know what
to say. And then sometimes they said something goofy. But
I never talked about this before. But Michelle, you know
you're my girl, so I can just tell you. You
know what I'm saying? Yes. Let's go. I never will forget.
I sat down with, um, with a lady who had
a management position at a ministry that I was serving at,
and she said, you know why you lost that child.
(32:57):
And I said, no, not really. I, you know, I
think my wife was trying to stay healthy and eat
healthy and all of that. She said, no, it had
nothing to do with that. The reason you lost a
child was because you guys had determined that you wanted
to live your lives, and this baby was a surprise,
and it seemed like you were complaining about it. And
that's why you lost the baby.
S3 (33:17):
I'm so sorry for that comment.
S2 (33:19):
I thought.
S3 (33:19):
I'm so sorry.
S2 (33:20):
Did that just happen? Did did she try to be
a prophet of doom, gloom and shame and guilt? And, uh,
I walk out shaking my head now. Now the average
person is not going to endure such craziness. And that's
craziness with a capital K right there. Um, I know
you've heard some things. Give us some wisdom. What are
(33:43):
some positive things we can say to folks? Some helpful
things that we can say or do. Okay.
S3 (33:48):
Listen, I'm so, so glad you brought this up because
this is part of the whole process. The Lord told
me that I had to be a well oiled machine
of forgiveness. Okay. Because people, you know, they don't know
what to say. So in their attempt to try to comfort,
they say some of the weirdest things. Okay. And some
of those things cut deep. And some of these people
(34:08):
are family members, people who are close to the heart. Yeah.
And you have to understand that some people are not
trying to hurt you, but they're trying to figure it out.
And that's always a dangerous to do when you're trying
to put two and two together. Because our math is off, okay.
It's going to be off. It really don't know. We
really don't know why God has allowed what he's allowed okay.
But nevertheless, when people say these things, you need to really,
(34:32):
really make sure that you keep your heart free and say, Lord,
you know, like Jesus said on the cross, they beat him.
And the Bible says he didn't even look human. He said,
forgive them. They don't even know what they're talking about.
They don't know what they're doing. They don't even understand
what they've done. Forgive them. Forgive them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's good. Set them free.
S2 (34:48):
That's that's really, really good. Um, I I'm encouraged through
what you're you're you're sharing right now. Um, I want to, um,
really just focus on the fact that there are times
where you are down and it's hard to arise. There's
also times where you're in the shadows. Um, you might
even feel like there will. There will be a lack
(35:11):
of light for the rest of my life. I will
always live in the shadows. I will always feel embarrassed.
I will always feel downtrodden. And yet, the book that
you wrote says that we ought to shine. How can
we come out of the shadows into that, to that
brighter place?
S3 (35:28):
You know I cannot be led by my emotions. I cannot.
And what feels so. So there's times where during this
season where, you know, again, lost another child or lost
another sweet one. And I would just my heart would
just be so weighty and heavy. And I would be
in my bed and I would be weeping and I
would say, in this moment, Lord, I need you to
(35:50):
grab Ahold of me. I need you to grab Ahold
of my mind and my thoughts, my emotions. I submit
them to you. I submit them to the truth. Because
if I keep you out there and I just sit
here and stew and stew and stew and my thoughts
and my reasoning and my what I feel, I can
go deeper and deeper into a pit that I don't.
I don't know where I'll end up. So I submit
(36:12):
what I feel and what's going on in my heart
in that moment to the Lord and say, you are
my anchor. And I began to verbally speak the truth,
even if I don't feel like it. I'll put on
some worship music. If I don't feel like singing, at
least let the atmosphere be. Be ripe with the presence
of God. Let me get into a place where I
can be covered in his presence. Uh, because that makes
(36:33):
all the difference in the mind. Uh, all the difference
in the world to your mind and to the way
you're going to, uh, be able to walk through what
you're dealing with in that moment.
S2 (36:42):
That's powerful. I appreciate you. I want you to stick around.
You guys give us a call. 87754836758775483675. We've got Michelle
Wilkins with us and walking us through the journey that
she's faced and journey that she's facing now. It's it's
(37:05):
a great testimony. It really, really is. Hey, let's hear
a little bit more of the song God of Israel,
stick around. We'll be back with Michelle in a little while.
Right here on equipped.
S4 (37:16):
O God of Israel, we lift you up. O God
of Israel. We lift.
S5 (37:26):
You up.
S4 (37:29):
Oh, God. I'm in.
S5 (37:31):
My.
S4 (37:31):
Yes you are. Oh, God of Israel, we lift you.
S5 (37:39):
Up.
S1 (37:49):
Each day on equip, we confront the cultural challenges of
our time, offering biblical truth with discernment and confidence in
God's plans and purposes. Your support as an equipper helps
us reach more people with God's truth, and you'll receive
exclusive monthly resources and updates to encourage your spiritual life.
Become an Equipper today and partner with us in this
(38:12):
vital ministry. Call 888644 4144 or go online to equip Radio.com.
S2 (38:29):
Welcome back to equipped with Chris Brooks I'm Roy Patterson
sitting in for Chris. Hey continue to keep Chris and
Jody in your prayers. Their lovely daughter. Um, God is
doing something. God is up to something amazing. So thank
you so much for being a part of the prayer journey. Hey,
we got Michelle Wilkins with us today. Gifted singer songwriter
(38:52):
and a woman who's gone through some valleys and yet
has come out on the other side. Hey, the the
last word in the title of your book is Conquer
My Show. What are some things that women in particular
need to conquer in this life?
S3 (39:07):
Shame. Shame is one of the main things that suffocate
women of God. Uh, not a good a good enough mother.
Or you didn't do this right. Or you're not like
the other mom, or you're, you know, all that comparison
and shame. Guilt, feeling that it's your fault for all
the things that are that are going wrong and and
so guilt and shame. We've got to conquer these giants
(39:29):
because they're liars. They're liars. And their again, their whole
desire is for you to stop believing God fully and
just be stewing in something and get stuck when you're
supposed to be. Rise up, sister girl. Get your sword out.
You're a warrior. Moving forward. You're building legacy. You're building
the the allowing the kingdom of God to be released
(39:51):
wherever your footsteps and making an impact in the world.
So the enemy, the darkness is pushed back and they
flee away from you. This is the power that you
have through Christ Jesus for his glory. And he wants
us fully alive and walking in that every single day
of our lives, through the ups and downs. And when
he needs to carry us, he'll carry us. Amen. When
we can put our feet down, he's going to bless us.
(40:12):
So yeah, that's it's time to conquer.
S2 (40:15):
I love it, I do. That shame thing is insidious,
isn't it?
S3 (40:19):
It is. It's over. It can be overwhelming. And it's
an epidemic in the church. It's a quiet, quiet thing
that people hold dear in their hearts.
S2 (40:28):
It's fascinating because there are certain things that we're willing
to live with. Other things we're like, oh, no, that's
that's horrible, that's sinful, that's wrong. That's I'll never, ever
succumb to that. And, you know, you go on and on.
But it's certain things we're like, well, I guess I
deserve that kind of pain, this kind of.
S3 (40:46):
Shame.
S2 (40:47):
This kind of guilt. It is. Yeah. It's something that
that's that's difficult. Now, I got to ask you the
follow up question in order to conquer shame. And I
know there are other things as well, but let's just
talk about shame for right now. What are some practical
steps that ladies and men can take?
S3 (41:04):
Okay, so there's a lie present, right? There's a lie
that is present. So we need to find the lie. Okay,
let's follow the rope to where this shame began. It
could be in childhood. Mom and dad, something happened. I
don't know, but find. Follow the rope to where that
shame was birthed. All right. Yes. And then ask the
Holy Spirit to unpack that moment. Begin to dissect it.
(41:26):
Begin to work through it with you so that we
can begin to extract the lies. You know, sometimes we
can't eat the whole cake. We've got to take pieces
and look at it and ask the Holy Spirit to
reveal the truth and expose the lie in this moment.
And if there's conversations that need to be had, he'll
lead you to it. If there needs to be forgiveness,
then he'll lead you to that. Whatever needs to happen
(41:47):
to rectify the situation and bring healing, even if that
means bringing in help. You know a counselor Christian counselor
to help you unpack that, ask the Holy Spirit what
is the strategy for my freedom in this time so
that shame is obliterated in my life?
S2 (42:01):
It's funny that some people hold on to the lie
that says, I can never forgive myself for what I
said or what I did, and they almost wear it
as a badge. That's right. This means true penance because
I won't forgive myself. Therefore, that means I'm really sorry
(42:22):
for what I did. Unfortunately, that becomes a part of
the identity. And you're not walking in grace. You're not
walking in the love of God, let alone the fear
of our awesome, gracious, faithful, faithful God. All right, so
shame is one thing that that that needs to be conquered.
Can you think of something else?
S3 (42:42):
Unforgiveness. Oh my goodness.
S2 (42:44):
Yeah yeah.
S3 (42:45):
Yeah. You know that one is a big one. And
you know, it prevents us from moving forward if we
refuse to forgive because our whole our whole belief system
in Christ, our whole receiving of salvation is based on forgiveness.
We were forgiven. Amen. So when we don't extend that
same grace to others, then the Lord is like, you know,
what are we doing right now? So it's a slap
(43:05):
in the face. So we want to conquer unforgiveness, and
we need to go to those spots again and ask
the Holy Spirit to help us be willing, first of all,
to obey God. It's not a it's not a suggestion,
it's a command. We must forgive.
S2 (43:19):
And I'm laughing because I've been there. I have, and.
S3 (43:23):
We all have.
S2 (43:24):
We've all been there. We have where we see the person. And,
you know, we were just praising God. Hallelujah! Thank you Jesus.
And singing songs and worshiping along with people. And then
we see that person. It's just like all that praise
and worship and joy just goes out the window.
S3 (43:41):
Oh, no. Where did God go? Where did the Lord go?
S2 (43:46):
Where did the Holy Spirit go? What happened to all
that hand raise? And that's hand clapping and stuff like that.
And it's funny how the Holy Spirit will be like, um,
I think you need to deal with this. That's right.
I really do. And so it's it's more than a notion.
And yet it sets you free, doesn't it?
S3 (44:04):
Absolutely it does. And that's that's what God wants for us.
He wants us to live, not visit, live in the freedom.
He died for a gruesome death.
S5 (44:15):
He.
S3 (44:15):
Died for it. He wants you to enjoy freedom now. It.
You have to do the work. All right. You have
to do the work. But freedom is our portion. Take it.
S2 (44:26):
Hmm? Hmm. I'm really inspired by your words today. And,
you know, people have called in, they haven't jumped on
the air, but they have called and said, I thank
God for the music. I thank God for the words
of encouragement concerning, um, the loss of, of children and
what that's meant to them, that someone else would talk
about that openly. But I also believe that there are
(44:48):
people right now who are like, well, wait a minute.
You mean I could come out of darkness? I could
come out of the shadows and walk in the light
of love, of grace and forgiveness? I don't have to
carry the burden of guilt, shame and unforgiveness. Are you serious?
And for that person that's listening right now, my show. Um.
Just talk to them for a second, will you, please?
S3 (45:10):
It is possible to walk through the fires of life
and not come out smelling like smoke. It is possible.
And the Lord made it, made it to where it
is possible. And so life comes at us fast. It
knocks the wind out of us. It is tough. It
can be unfair, all the things. But the Lord said, listen,
take heart. I've overcome the world, the entire world. And
(45:32):
if you hang with me, I'll make sure. I'll make
sure that you too can do the same. And that's
why we cling to him. That's why he's our closest friend.
That's why he's our greatest love. Because as we're connected
to him, I don't care what comes our way. We
can overcome. We're built for it.
S2 (45:48):
Wow. That's great. Absolutely great. I agree with you wholeheartedly. Hey,
if people want to reach out to you, how can
they do it?
S3 (45:55):
Oh, I'd love to meet people. So my show music,
my music, um, on Instagram, my show music, and then
my show. wilkins.com. I would love to see you at
my website as well. I just look forward to meeting
all of your sweet, sweet, sweet hearts.
S2 (46:11):
Name of the book one more time.
S3 (46:13):
Arise, shine and conquer.
S2 (46:18):
You got to see it just like that.
S3 (46:19):
Come on. That's right.
S2 (46:22):
All right, Michelle, we have enjoyed having you with us today.
Thank you so much for sharing your heart, sharing your journey. And, uh,
you love Jesus. You're Mary, wonderful husband. And is it
two kids? How many children now?
S3 (46:35):
Two. Two sons that tear up my house in super loud,
but I love.
S2 (46:38):
I heard them in the background.
S3 (46:40):
Yes.
S2 (46:41):
Thank God for him. It's a joyful noise. Amen.
S3 (46:44):
That's right, that's right.
S2 (46:45):
Thank you for being with us, sister. Bless you.
S3 (46:47):
My pleasure. God bless you as well.
S2 (46:49):
God bless you. Hey, I'm Roy Patterson, sitting in for
Chris Brooks. What a joy it is to hang out
with you. I hope you're enjoying this day. It is
the day the Lord has made. And you and I
have a right to rejoice and be glad in it.
Equipped with Chris Brooks is a production of the Moody
Radio Network under the umbrella of the Moody Bible Institute.
I'll see you soon. God bless.
Well. Hey there friends, welcome to another exciting edition of
equip with Chris Brooks! I'm so thrilled that you've joined
us today. Do me a favor strap on your seat
belt as we navigate through the contours of culture, as
always with the lens of the biblical worldview on. But
before we do that, let me remind you, this is
the day that the Lord has made. He is giving
(00:40):
it as a gift so that you and I can
rejoice and be glad in it. So let's do just that.
Let's follow the words of the Apostle Paul. Let's rejoice
in the Lord always. And again I say, rejoice. Today
I want you to help me welcome my good friend
Roy Patterson to the host seat. Roy is a man
of God who has ministered through radio and the pastorate
(01:00):
for decades. He's the host and originator of the Urban
Praise streaming channel, and also host Celebration of Praise and
Music for Sunday here on Moody Radio. Roy, thank you
for leading this edition of equip.
S2 (01:17):
I'm so excited to be with you today. Chris Brooks
is one of my favorite people on the planet. We
certainly are praying for him and his beautiful wife, Jody,
and just their whole family. Just good people. They love
Jesus and they love you. And Chris often speaks of
you guys and he misses being here. But make it
a point to keep him in your prayers and know
(01:38):
that he will return as soon as possible. Well, I'm
enjoying this day that the Lord has made, and we've
had a lot of heat in our country. And you
know what? We've got to persevere. We wanted it warm
when it was cold and we wanted cold when it's hot.
And yet God is faithful, isn't he? So we're praying
(01:58):
for those of you who are facing, uh, adverse heat.
Super heat. Uh, please find a way to stay cool
and look out for your neighbors. Will you do that?
All right, well, today we've got a special show. We've
got my show. Wilkins with us. She's originally from Frankfort, Kentucky,
and she traveled with her missionary dad and Ghanaian mom
(02:18):
to various countries, speaking and leading worship from an early age.
After graduating, she moved to Nashville, Tennessee and became a
Christian musician. Michelle and her husband Michael now live in Dallas,
Texas and currently attend Upper Room Ministries. Was thrilled to
have my share with us today. Sister, how are you?
S3 (02:41):
I'm wonderful. Thank you for allowing me to be here
with you all today.
S2 (02:44):
Oh, it's really a thrill. I always enjoy having folks
who sing, I love creatives, I love what God is
doing in the lives of his people. You know, my show,
we serve a creative God, don't we?
S3 (02:57):
Oh, yes we do. Absolutely.
S2 (02:59):
And he is able to do what we can not
even imagine. All right, so I noted that you are
an author. Uh, and you're a musician. How did you
get involved in singing?
S3 (03:11):
Well, you know, I've been doing it for a while
since I was little. With my dad. We would go
to different countries and he would have me lead worship,
and so that's where I got the nerves out of
me so that I could stand on a stage and,
and and sing to the glory of God in a room, uh,
and watch the Lord just love on his people. And
so that was the beginning of it. And then God
was so kind that, you know, I've always wanted to
(03:33):
be a singer. And it's cute when you say that
when you're 7 or 8. But, boy, when you're like
in your 20s and you're still saying you want to
be a singer, people are like, oh, she doesn't know
what she wants to be like. That's you need to
be a doctor or whatever.
S2 (03:42):
Whatever. Right, right.
S3 (03:43):
God's so good. He opened the door. Mandisa. The late Mandisa. Yeah.
We became friends and she went on American Idol and
she asked if I wanted to sing background with her.
When she got her record deal in Nashville, I said yep.
And then I started touring the country with her. And
then other artist opportunities opened up as well.
S2 (04:00):
It's amazing what God does through music.
S3 (04:03):
So I'm telling.
S2 (04:04):
You. So as a as a kid, I mean, did
you start singing when you were 7 or 8 years old?
S3 (04:08):
I did my first talent show was at five years
old in front of my entire school. Yeah.
S2 (04:14):
Wow.
S3 (04:14):
So I fell in love with it. Then I was like,
I love this, I love singing, I love, I love
having the room. It was just it was just wonderful.
S2 (04:22):
When it when it comes to music, I can tell
for you it's not just notes, it's not just song leading.
It really is entering into the presence of God. Uh,
do you remember the age where it really hit you?
This is more than just something that's fun. It's more
than a talent show. This is something I can do
to the glory and honor of God.
S3 (04:40):
Yes, I was in South America, and I remember singing
a song that in English, however, I saw the power
of God transcend culture, language barriers. I saw the Holy
Spirit rest upon the people so powerfully. And that's when
I realized that this is nothing to be played with.
This is. This is God's hand, uh, on a on
(05:01):
a gift. And and he wants to use it for
his glory. And so, yes, that's when I realized this
is this is something that's powerful. And I want to
make sure that I, I use it for his glory.
S2 (05:11):
Now, I know that you've sung with Mandisa. I understand, uh,
Cece Winans has been a part of your life too.
Is that right?
S3 (05:17):
That's right, that's right. She's been a mentor of mine. Yeah.
S2 (05:21):
And so, uh, talk about that relationship.
S3 (05:24):
Oh, gosh. So I, we had been going to church
in Nashville, the same church for many years, but then
her and her family broke off and started their new church.
And I after a while, I started attending that church.
And next thing you know, they asked if I wanted
to be on staff. And so I said no at
first because honestly, I didn't want to know what was
(05:45):
behind the curtain. You know, I had just come from
a church and there was some, some, um, moral failures there,
and it was very painful. And so I was like,
you know what? I just want to just I just
want to stay right where I am. And then the
Lord made it very clear that's what I needed to do.
And so I said yes to the position and became
one of the leaders in the church and just helping
gather the young people and just training them and and
(06:08):
discipling them. And she discipled me in the process. And
she said, baby girl. She said, the way up is down.
Stay humble, stay humble, stay humble. And I just watched
her walk out. Jesus for real. Behind closed doors in
front of people. She's the real deal. And I just
grew from from her mentorship, her and her husband. And
it was such a gift to us.
S2 (06:30):
So when it comes to music for you, is there
a process either in songwriting or preparing to go in
front of people to lead worship? Do you sort of
go through a ritual? What what do you do to
get ready?
S3 (06:44):
Oh, I lay before the Lord. Lord, I have nothing
to give these people. I have a gift. But that's
not enough, I need you, I need you to breathe
on this time. And I want you to love the
people through me. Um. And so I sit with the
Lord for a while. I'll worship just he and I together. Um.
And then, um, I just ask for the Holy Spirit.
I lean on him, and then I go in the
(07:05):
room and. And just the atmosphere of heaven breaks out
in the room for his glory. And that's what you want.
That's what you want.
S2 (07:12):
I love the fact that you're a worshiper that loves
to worship. Um, I think it's difficult when people stand
in front of God's people and it becomes a performance,
or it becomes a form of a demand that says, hey,
you need to reverence my gift. And if I say jump,
you should just say how high? If I say stand,
(07:34):
you should say how long? You know.
S3 (07:36):
Well, I've been there, I've been there, I've been there.
Talk about it. Um, okay. So really quickly. Um, when
I was on the road, uh, you know, with TobyMac,
you know, you've got thousands of people who are applauding you,
and you've got the lights, the cameras, all the things.
And it got to me. It got to me. Uh,
there was a time where, you know, you want to
(07:57):
make sure that you're relevant, stay relevant amongst your peers
and what's coming up next. And you want to be
the star and you want to be. And it began.
It began to cultivate a very self-centered idea of what
a Christian worshipper or artist is, and I got caught
up in that. I'll be honest with you. Yeah, yeah.
And one day, while while praying, a very noble sounding prayer. Lord,
(08:18):
send me to the nations, the Lord made it very
clear to me, you know, Imma send me out. But
what I was really saying is make me a Christian
superstar in your name.
S2 (08:26):
Mhm.
S3 (08:27):
That's what I was saying. And he made it very
clear to me. He said you want the people to
love you, but you have no intentions on loving them back.
And I, I don't need another superstar. I need you
to love the people that put you in front of.
And that was groundbreaking for me. It shook me to
my core, and I. I submitted to the Lord and
I said, Lord, take a wrecking ball and break this
(08:47):
wall that I have erected around myself and and how
I've elevated myself in my own eyes and my desires
are not aligned with yours. Lord, forgive me for my heart, posture,
and I. And that's when the door opened for me
to start working at the church, because God wanted me
to get in the trenches with people, you know and
love people for real. And that's what that's that whole
(09:08):
season of of working with pastor Cece and her family.
That's what that whole time was about, was cultivating a
love for his people so that the next time I
write a song, it's not. It's not to be the
number one hit. It's so that God would pierce hearts.
S2 (09:22):
You know, it has been a concern of mine over
the last couple of weeks that we've gone from seeking
God to seeking trophies, seeking awards. And my prayer is
for those who stand in front of God's people, whether
it's it's music or preaching or whatever it might be.
I'm a preacher. I lead worship as well. And you're
(09:42):
absolutely right. It is a subtle, crazy temptation. And and
I'm I'm determined like you to be what the Lord
would have me to be where he would want me to,
to be at all. Right. So the other other side
of the pendulum. Okay. On one side, it's me, me, me, me, me.
On the other side. It's. I'm down. I'm. I'm disgusting. I'm.
(10:06):
I'm wretched. It's like you've got these these two pendulums.
That's right. And so you got a song called Royal Roar.
What's that song about?
S3 (10:16):
Listen, I don't do that pitiful stuff, uh, because that
gives glory to the enemy. That's not how God created me.
That's not who I am. I am built to overcome.
S2 (10:27):
Amen.
S3 (10:28):
Right? Yeah, I'm built to overcome. I love the stance
that David had when he looked at the giant in
front of him and said, the audacity of you. Do
you know who my God is? Who is this uncircumcised?
You see what I'm saying? He knew who his God was.
He knew who he was. And that's how God wants
us to be. So Royal roar says, lift up your voice.
Know who you are, your true identity, this pitiful stuff
(10:49):
that doesn't work, it has no power in it, and
there's no glory in it for God. Therefore rise up
into your true identity. Walk in your God given authority
and release who God, what God has told you to
release in the earth.
S2 (11:02):
I love that I want to hear a little bit
of that song right now. It's called Royal Roar. I'm
Roy Patterson, sitting in for Chris Brooks. This is equipped.
S4 (11:11):
Can we be honest? Do we really believe that this is.
Just look around us. Can you see what's happening? So
suit up. Put your armor on. We're not fighting flesh
and blood. The time has come. Bring the sound of
(11:35):
a royal roar. Not gonna back down no more I can't,
I really wanna go up. Raise your arm, roar your roar.
Raise the sound of a royal roar. Not gonna back
down no more I can't I really want the war.
Raise your up. Royal roar. If we could only See
(12:00):
things like it does with seeing us all standing next
to us. Step up. There's a place for you. You
were born for this king to move. The time has come.
Bring the sound of a royal rock. Not gonna back
(12:23):
down no more. I don't really want the war. Raise
your rock, Royal rock. Raise the sound of a royal rock.
Not gonna back down no more. I don't really want
the war. Raise your rock. Royal rock. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
(13:04):
Turn up the heat. We won't retreat. We've had enough.
We're rising up. This is our blood. But victory! Ignite
the fire! Release your power deep in our souls. Until
we know this is our real identity. Turn up the heat.
(13:28):
We won't retreat. We've had enough. Rising up. This is
our blood, our victory. This is the victory! Ignite the fire!
Release your fire deep in our souls. Until we know
this is our real identity. This is our real identity.
(13:50):
This is your true identity. This is your true identity.
This is your Beautiful destiny brings the sound of a
royal road. Like the back down no more. I guess
I really want the war. Raise your arms, Royal rock.
(14:12):
Raise the sound of a royal rock. Not gonna back
down no more. I really want the war. Raise your rock,
Royal rock. I come back down no more. Raise your
(14:32):
arms up. Yeah. I'm gonna back down no more. Yeah.
S2 (14:44):
Well, that's my show. Wilkins. Our guest for today. And man,
what a great, great song. My show. Thank you so
much for being with us. I want you to stick around.
We're going to open up the phone lines and people
can call in at (877)Â 548-3675. That's (877)Â 548-3675. I'm Roy Patterson.
(15:06):
I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks. What a wonderful person
he is. And we're talking to a sister who not
only leads worship, but she knows what what it is
to worship while she's been wounded, going through trials, going
through tribulations. And the Lord brought her out. The Lord
has kept her. The Lord has delivered her. You have
(15:28):
to stick around to hear this story. It's absolutely amazing. Again,
I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting in for Chris Brooks. Thanks
for joining me here on equipped.
S1 (15:47):
Do you have questions about your sexuality that no one
seems to address? Whether it's sexual sin, gender confusion or
issues in your marriage. Surrender Sexuality by Doctor Julie Slattery
has insights you need. She'll help you to see that
God wants to be invited into your questions and struggles.
And when you do, everything changes. Request your copy with
(16:11):
your gift of any amount. To equip, simply call (888)Â 644-4144
or visit Equip Radio Org.
S2 (16:27):
Welcome back to equip with Chris Brooks. I'm Roy Patterson,
thanks so much for being with me. Our guest today
is Michelle Wilkins, gifted singer songwriter, loves Jesus, loves family.
And isn't it interesting that just because you're a follower
of Christ, it does not mean that life will not
(16:47):
hold pain, sorrow, difficulty and my show. You've had your share.
Take us on a journey. You've just like anybody. You
want to have a family. You want there to be
a home that's bursting with kids, running around, etc. but, uh, yeah,
you've had some difficulties along the way. Talk about it.
S3 (17:11):
That's right. So my husband and I were ready to
start a family, and we were really excited about it.
And we got pregnant and we were telling our our
friends and family members, our pastors, of course, Pastor Cissy
and her Aunt Alvin at the time. And we went
to hear the heartbeat. It was a surreal moment. I
couldn't believe a human was growing in this body of mine.
God is amazing. We went back several several weeks later
(17:34):
and the nurse's face drops when she's checking me and
she says, I'm so sorry, sweetheart. We no longer can
find a heartbeat. And I could not understand the words
that came out of her mouth. So I said, I'm sorry,
I don't. I'm not. I'm not following you. She said,
I'm sorry, sweetheart. You've lost your baby. Oh, my. And
my husband collapses on my chest. He starts to weep.
He begs the lady to check one more time, and
(17:56):
we get to the car and I look at the
radio and it's turned all the way down. But I
see the name of the song is called Count It
All Joy. And can I just tell you? I stared
at those words and I fluctuated with frustration and anger.
And who wrote that? Who? What do you mean? Count
it all joy when you go through trials and tribulations. Like,
(18:17):
how can you even say this? And in that moment,
I felt the Lord say, do you want to find out?
And I it was a crossroads moment for me. I
could go into this pit that was saying, God is
not good. Look what he did to you. How could
he allow this? Doesn't the scripture say he he he
doesn't withhold any good thing? And all the things that
were brewing in that pit. And I didn't want to
(18:39):
fall in that pit because I didn't know who I
would become and how long I'd be there.
S2 (18:42):
Right.
S3 (18:43):
Right. And so I so the only option both options
were hard now, but the only option was to turn
to God and say, okay, I'm going to cling to you.
And the only thing I need to do as a
worshipper was to start singing. I began to worship, and
that was the beginning of God showing me how the
enemy works in the midst. He kind of hitchhikes on
the back of our grief if we if we allow
(19:04):
him to. And he that's the door by which he
enters and tries to put a wedge between you and
the Lord. Now here's the thing. You'll still keep going
to church. You'll still keep preaching. You'll still keep going
to those women and men's conferences. But in your heart,
you've taken several steps back and retreated to a place
of of of self-protection and comfort zone, just in case
God disappoints or disappoints again. And so now you're no
(19:26):
longer using your faith full throttle anymore for anything. And
the problem with that is you can't be who God's
called you to be. If you if you reserve your faith,
you can't do what God's called you to do without
taking that risk and stepping out and partnering with him
and the impossible. And so that's what the enemy was after.
He was after my faith that I would not become
who God called me to be. And he would use
(19:46):
this circumstance to make sure that was the case.
S2 (19:49):
We're talking with Michelle Wilkins today. Love for you to
give us a call. The number is 87754836758775483675. And she
certainly can bring a word of comfort and encouragement. Love
for you to call in. (877)Â 548-3675. Michelle I know you
(20:11):
know this song. We bring the sacrifice of praise. How
do you how do you align that song up when
you're going through pain.
S3 (20:20):
Because you don't feel like it? It is a sacrifice.
It's hard. Right? It's hard. Yeah. And. But yet, in
the midst of it all, you make the decision. The
enemy is not going to torment me, but I'm going
to torment him by sitting in this hard moment when
I don't understand and I don't like it. And I'm
going to lift my voice and worship my king in
the midst of this dark moment.
S2 (20:41):
Mm. All right, so this happened not just one time, though, right?
S3 (20:47):
Eight times.
S2 (20:49):
I had a baby. Eight times.
S3 (20:51):
Yes. Eight miscarriages? Yes. And each time the Lord held
my hand and escorted me through each time. And it
was something to behold to see that he is indeed
the treasure and dark places, y'all. I love the Lord
more now than I did before I began to walk
this very difficult, challenging season.
S2 (21:07):
Interesting. Wow. Okay, so so I really need you to
paint a picture because there are people listening right now
who have been in that place that you're talking about.
At first, people are super excited for you and buying clothes, diapers, etc.
by the time you get to the third miscarriage or
(21:29):
the fourth, let alone the eighth. Um, what's what's the temperature? What?
How are people feeling around you? How are you feeling?
S3 (21:36):
I had a moment with the Lord that sustained me.
He didn't have to do this. But let me tell
you what happened, okay? My very first time that I
had a miscarriage. And I started to worship On the
way home, I stayed in my room upstairs. All I
knew to do was just keep singing. I knew that
if I stopped singing, the accusations of God's God not
being good was going to overwhelm me. I was going
(21:57):
to break. So I just kept singing. Six hours later. Wow.
The presence of the Lord filled my house so strongly
that my husband, who was downstairs, comes running to the
banister and says, baby, keep singing. The atmosphere had shifted
so deeply in my house, and I knew His Holiness
had stepped in because I wanted to become one with
the carpet fibers. I couldn't get low enough. His presence
(22:19):
was overwhelming, and I it took my breath away. Yeah.
And in that moment, I realized you are with me.
You see me. You love me. And I thank you
that you came to see about me in this moment.
And every time the doctor would say. No longer a heartbeat,
no longer a heartbeat, I remembered that moment where I
felt the liquid love of God overtake me. And from
(22:41):
that moment I began. The very next day I went
to the grocery. I went to the. I'm sorry, the
the store. And I bought two onesies and I put
them in my closet and I began to I felt
like God said, it's okay for me to contend for
my promise. And I began to say, I can't wait
to hold you. Oh, I can't wait to kiss your
sweet faces. I would pass by the hospital and point
at that hospital and say, I will have my children
(23:03):
in that hospital. And the day that I had my child,
my son, in that hospital, looking at that same road,
I would pass by and point to it. The worship
that came out of me was overwhelming. God is faithful.
S2 (23:14):
God is faithful. God is. God is so faithful. I
know there's someone listening right now. They they're they're in
that place. Whether it's the loss of a child, it's
some other, uh, difficult, difficult circumstance. And they are wondering,
like job, what's up? What's what's what's going on? I'm
(23:37):
living right. I'm going to church. I'm faithful. You know,
they're going down the list.
S3 (23:43):
Yes, I did it. Yeah, I did it, I did.
There was a sense of entitlement that came pouring out
of me that I didn't know was there until after
this moment.
S2 (23:51):
Interesting.
S3 (23:52):
I began to say, I don't deserve this like I
do mission work, I do this, I do that, I
don't deserve this type of trial. And I somehow I
had nurtured the thought that I was too good to
go through something like this. And the Lord was like, sweetheart,
it doesn't work that way. It just doesn't work that way.
And I had to release and submit my right to
(24:13):
be right, my right to be good in my own
eyes and just let the Lord do what he would,
you know, do a work in my heart through this situation.
S2 (24:22):
Um, I'm thinking about Mary and Martha, and you've you've
heard this story, you've sung this story, alabaster box, etc.. Um,
and you know Mary well, first Martha says, if you
had been here, my brother wouldn't have died.
S3 (24:37):
Mhm.
S2 (24:38):
And then when Mary arrives, she says the same thing,
but her posture is Sure is different. That's right. She
is definitely hurting. She's definitely wounded. It's pain. And yet
the tone seems to be different. Um. Talk about what
it's like to worship while you're while you're wounded and
not sort of drift into a la la land, but
(25:00):
to say, hey, this is where I'm at. And yet
I still praise him. Talk about that.
S3 (25:05):
So your heart is broken. Okay. So you're all the
color has left. You're just. You're at the bottom. Okay.
And then you realize all you have is the power
of God. And so what you want to do is
just offer your praise and adoration to him. And that
will strengthen you through it all.
S2 (25:21):
Mm. This is powerful. Hey, I'd love to hear from
you guys. Give me a call at 87754836758775483675. Michelle would
love to interact with you, pray for you, encourage you.
Whatever the season is that you're facing this season, That's difficult.
(25:43):
You're not alone. You are not alone. God is with you.
God still has a purpose and a plan. And even
when you can't trace his hand. The old song says
you can trust his heart. I'm Roy Patterson. I'm sitting
in for Chris Brooks, my show. Wilkins is our guest today.
You stick around. I'm Roy Patterson, sitting in for Chris
(26:03):
Brooks here on equipped. Welcome back to equipped with Chris
Brooks I'm Roy Patterson. Thanks so much for hanging out
with me. I want to stop and thank God for
(26:27):
you Equippers you are determined to see this ministry go forward.
You see the value in what Chris Brooks brings day
in and day out. And I'm with you. I think
it's so valuable. I think it's so important. So thank
you so much for your financial support and your prayers.
It means the world to us. Hey, do you have
(26:47):
questions about your sexuality that no one seems to address?
Whether it's sexual sin, gender confusion, or issues in your marriage?
Surrendered Sexuality by Doctor Julie Slattery has insights, and they're
the insights that you actually need. She will help you
see that God wants to just do something significant in
(27:09):
your life, and he wants to be invited into your
questions and struggles. And when you do that, I believe
he's going to do something great and mighty. Or maybe
you know someone that's struggling and going through and this
would be a great resource for them. Request your copy
with your gift of any amount to equipped. Call 888644 4144.
(27:31):
That's 888644 4144 or visit equipped radio.org. That's equipped radio.
I'm Roy Patterson. Thanks so much for hanging out with me.
We've got Michelle Wilkins on the line right now, and
we would love for you to give us a call.
Here's the number. (877)Â 548-3675. This is God of Israel.
S4 (27:58):
There is no God.
S5 (28:00):
Like the God of Israel. The. Eternal one, my ever
present help. Your praise goes on forever. Your praise goes
(28:29):
on forever. You are the one who blew off my date. Oh,
yes you do. With faithful love, you meet me face
(28:55):
to face.
S2 (29:00):
It is my show. Wilkins with God of Israel. My show.
I love that song. Did you write that one?
S3 (29:06):
I did not write that song, but I enjoyed singing it.
It was.
S2 (29:09):
Beautiful. Sing it well.
S3 (29:10):
I wish I wrote it.
S2 (29:11):
Yeah. That's okay. Hey, you know, I really believe that
God will give other folks what we need. Amen. He'll
give us what we need to to bless them with
as well. Hey, I love that. Um, so have you
been writing since you were seven, or. This happened when
you became an adult?
S3 (29:27):
Uh, when I became a a scary. Let me try
that again. When I became an adult, I began writing, and, uh. Yeah,
I sat with people who were better than me and
learned from them, and, uh, it was just a blessing.
I love songwriting.
S2 (29:43):
Yeah. God has given you a gift. He really has vocally.
And as far as you know, just writing the songs out.
Let's go back to Mary and Martha for a second. Uh,
I really believe that what happened with them aligns with
your your book. The book is called is it a rise,
shine and conquer? Is that right?
S3 (30:00):
Yes. That's right, that's right.
S2 (30:01):
Yeah. And so I really believe in their situation. They
were as low as they could go. They were down.
They were out. And yet there was something in both
of them that said, I still love Jesus. I still
will follow him. And I wanted him to come and
be my healer. But maybe, just maybe, he's doing something bigger, broader,
(30:24):
better in my life. Uh, take us a little deeper
in your circumstance, because I know you learned a lot
of lessons.
S3 (30:31):
I did. I saw how the enemy would love to
shut me down. And again, you know he steals. He
loves to do that for sure. And so he was
trying to steal, um, my relationship with the Lord, of course,
make me question him, but also cause me to pull
back and not use my faith. And so I realized that,
and I said no. And I began to fight. I
(30:52):
began to fight for what I know the Lord has said.
I'm he's called me to do, called me to be.
And so I arise, shine and conquer is literally what
I had to do. I had to get up and say, Lord,
I choose to believe the words that you have spoken
in your word. I'm not going to question them up
against what my feelings feel like or what things seem
(31:13):
to be. I only know things in part. So I'm
going to submit what I think I know. To what?
To the one who knows all things. And I'm just
going to cling to you, even in the dark, and
know that all things are going to work for my
good in this moment.
S2 (31:26):
Mm. It's interesting that we can fall into a transactional mindset. Yes, absolutely.
I mean, you just you just are living in a
world where, okay, I do this, then God will do that. Oh,
and God has to do this because I've been involved
in this, that and the other. And and it's just science,
you know, one plus one.
S3 (31:46):
That's right, that's right. And we cannot see the Lord
that way. And I had to tell the Lord, if
you never give me a baby, if you never give
me a child, I will not slow my pace in you.
I'm yours and you are mine. I'm not leaving you.
I'm not leaving you. Where can I go? The alternative is. Oh, gosh,
I don't even. Can you imagine? I don't want that.
(32:09):
So even in the middle of not understanding, I'm not
leaving you. Mm.
S2 (32:13):
Wow. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's that's really, really powerful. Um,
I know when my wife and I lost a child, uh, people. Yeah.
It was it was difficult. It was difficult for me,
but really, really difficult for her. And, um, I remember
people rallying around us and loving on us and encouraging us.
(32:34):
Then there are other people that just didn't know what
to say. And then sometimes they said something goofy. But
I never talked about this before. But Michelle, you know
you're my girl, so I can just tell you. You
know what I'm saying? Yes. Let's go. I never will forget.
I sat down with, um, with a lady who had
a management position at a ministry that I was serving at,
and she said, you know why you lost that child.
(32:57):
And I said, no, not really. I, you know, I
think my wife was trying to stay healthy and eat
healthy and all of that. She said, no, it had
nothing to do with that. The reason you lost a
child was because you guys had determined that you wanted
to live your lives, and this baby was a surprise,
and it seemed like you were complaining about it. And
that's why you lost the baby.
S3 (33:17):
I'm so sorry for that comment.
S2 (33:19):
I thought.
S3 (33:19):
I'm so sorry.
S2 (33:20):
Did that just happen? Did did she try to be
a prophet of doom, gloom and shame and guilt? And, uh,
I walk out shaking my head now. Now the average
person is not going to endure such craziness. And that's
craziness with a capital K right there. Um, I know
you've heard some things. Give us some wisdom. What are
(33:43):
some positive things we can say to folks? Some helpful
things that we can say or do. Okay.
S3 (33:48):
Listen, I'm so, so glad you brought this up because
this is part of the whole process. The Lord told
me that I had to be a well oiled machine
of forgiveness. Okay. Because people, you know, they don't know
what to say. So in their attempt to try to comfort,
they say some of the weirdest things. Okay. And some
of those things cut deep. And some of these people
(34:08):
are family members, people who are close to the heart. Yeah.
And you have to understand that some people are not
trying to hurt you, but they're trying to figure it out.
And that's always a dangerous to do when you're trying
to put two and two together. Because our math is off, okay.
It's going to be off. It really don't know. We
really don't know why God has allowed what he's allowed okay.
But nevertheless, when people say these things, you need to really,
(34:32):
really make sure that you keep your heart free and say, Lord,
you know, like Jesus said on the cross, they beat him.
And the Bible says he didn't even look human. He said,
forgive them. They don't even know what they're talking about.
They don't know what they're doing. They don't even understand
what they've done. Forgive them. Forgive them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's good. Set them free.
S2 (34:48):
That's that's really, really good. Um, I I'm encouraged through
what you're you're you're sharing right now. Um, I want to, um,
really just focus on the fact that there are times
where you are down and it's hard to arise. There's
also times where you're in the shadows. Um, you might
even feel like there will. There will be a lack
(35:11):
of light for the rest of my life. I will
always live in the shadows. I will always feel embarrassed.
I will always feel downtrodden. And yet, the book that
you wrote says that we ought to shine. How can
we come out of the shadows into that, to that
brighter place?
S3 (35:28):
You know I cannot be led by my emotions. I cannot.
And what feels so. So there's times where during this
season where, you know, again, lost another child or lost
another sweet one. And I would just my heart would
just be so weighty and heavy. And I would be
in my bed and I would be weeping and I
would say, in this moment, Lord, I need you to
(35:50):
grab Ahold of me. I need you to grab Ahold
of my mind and my thoughts, my emotions. I submit
them to you. I submit them to the truth. Because
if I keep you out there and I just sit
here and stew and stew and stew and my thoughts
and my reasoning and my what I feel, I can
go deeper and deeper into a pit that I don't.
I don't know where I'll end up. So I submit
(36:12):
what I feel and what's going on in my heart
in that moment to the Lord and say, you are
my anchor. And I began to verbally speak the truth,
even if I don't feel like it. I'll put on
some worship music. If I don't feel like singing, at
least let the atmosphere be. Be ripe with the presence
of God. Let me get into a place where I
can be covered in his presence. Uh, because that makes
(36:33):
all the difference in the mind. Uh, all the difference
in the world to your mind and to the way
you're going to, uh, be able to walk through what
you're dealing with in that moment.
S2 (36:42):
That's powerful. I appreciate you. I want you to stick around.
You guys give us a call. 87754836758775483675. We've got Michelle
Wilkins with us and walking us through the journey that
she's faced and journey that she's facing now. It's it's
(37:05):
a great testimony. It really, really is. Hey, let's hear
a little bit more of the song God of Israel,
stick around. We'll be back with Michelle in a little while.
Right here on equipped.
S4 (37:16):
O God of Israel, we lift you up. O God
of Israel. We lift.
S5 (37:26):
You up.
S4 (37:29):
Oh, God. I'm in.
S5 (37:31):
My.
S4 (37:31):
Yes you are. Oh, God of Israel, we lift you.
S5 (37:39):
Up.
S1 (37:49):
Each day on equip, we confront the cultural challenges of
our time, offering biblical truth with discernment and confidence in
God's plans and purposes. Your support as an equipper helps
us reach more people with God's truth, and you'll receive
exclusive monthly resources and updates to encourage your spiritual life.
Become an Equipper today and partner with us in this
(38:12):
vital ministry. Call 888644 4144 or go online to equip Radio.com.
S2 (38:29):
Welcome back to equipped with Chris Brooks I'm Roy Patterson
sitting in for Chris. Hey continue to keep Chris and
Jody in your prayers. Their lovely daughter. Um, God is
doing something. God is up to something amazing. So thank
you so much for being a part of the prayer journey. Hey,
we got Michelle Wilkins with us today. Gifted singer songwriter
(38:52):
and a woman who's gone through some valleys and yet
has come out on the other side. Hey, the the
last word in the title of your book is Conquer
My Show. What are some things that women in particular
need to conquer in this life?
S3 (39:07):
Shame. Shame is one of the main things that suffocate
women of God. Uh, not a good a good enough mother.
Or you didn't do this right. Or you're not like
the other mom, or you're, you know, all that comparison
and shame. Guilt, feeling that it's your fault for all
the things that are that are going wrong and and
so guilt and shame. We've got to conquer these giants
(39:29):
because they're liars. They're liars. And their again, their whole
desire is for you to stop believing God fully and
just be stewing in something and get stuck when you're
supposed to be. Rise up, sister girl. Get your sword out.
You're a warrior. Moving forward. You're building legacy. You're building
the the allowing the kingdom of God to be released
(39:51):
wherever your footsteps and making an impact in the world.
So the enemy, the darkness is pushed back and they
flee away from you. This is the power that you
have through Christ Jesus for his glory. And he wants
us fully alive and walking in that every single day
of our lives, through the ups and downs. And when
he needs to carry us, he'll carry us. Amen. When
we can put our feet down, he's going to bless us.
(40:12):
So yeah, that's it's time to conquer.
S2 (40:15):
I love it, I do. That shame thing is insidious,
isn't it?
S3 (40:19):
It is. It's over. It can be overwhelming. And it's
an epidemic in the church. It's a quiet, quiet thing
that people hold dear in their hearts.
S2 (40:28):
It's fascinating because there are certain things that we're willing
to live with. Other things we're like, oh, no, that's
that's horrible, that's sinful, that's wrong. That's I'll never, ever
succumb to that. And, you know, you go on and on.
But it's certain things we're like, well, I guess I
deserve that kind of pain, this kind of.
S3 (40:46):
Shame.
S2 (40:47):
This kind of guilt. It is. Yeah. It's something that
that's that's difficult. Now, I got to ask you the
follow up question in order to conquer shame. And I
know there are other things as well, but let's just
talk about shame for right now. What are some practical
steps that ladies and men can take?
S3 (41:04):
Okay, so there's a lie present, right? There's a lie
that is present. So we need to find the lie. Okay,
let's follow the rope to where this shame began. It
could be in childhood. Mom and dad, something happened. I
don't know, but find. Follow the rope to where that
shame was birthed. All right. Yes. And then ask the
Holy Spirit to unpack that moment. Begin to dissect it.
(41:26):
Begin to work through it with you so that we
can begin to extract the lies. You know, sometimes we
can't eat the whole cake. We've got to take pieces
and look at it and ask the Holy Spirit to
reveal the truth and expose the lie in this moment.
And if there's conversations that need to be had, he'll
lead you to it. If there needs to be forgiveness,
then he'll lead you to that. Whatever needs to happen
(41:47):
to rectify the situation and bring healing, even if that
means bringing in help. You know a counselor Christian counselor
to help you unpack that, ask the Holy Spirit what
is the strategy for my freedom in this time so
that shame is obliterated in my life?
S2 (42:01):
It's funny that some people hold on to the lie
that says, I can never forgive myself for what I
said or what I did, and they almost wear it
as a badge. That's right. This means true penance because
I won't forgive myself. Therefore, that means I'm really sorry
(42:22):
for what I did. Unfortunately, that becomes a part of
the identity. And you're not walking in grace. You're not
walking in the love of God, let alone the fear
of our awesome, gracious, faithful, faithful God. All right, so
shame is one thing that that that needs to be conquered.
Can you think of something else?
S3 (42:42):
Unforgiveness. Oh my goodness.
S2 (42:44):
Yeah yeah.
S3 (42:45):
Yeah. You know that one is a big one. And
you know, it prevents us from moving forward if we
refuse to forgive because our whole our whole belief system
in Christ, our whole receiving of salvation is based on forgiveness.
We were forgiven. Amen. So when we don't extend that
same grace to others, then the Lord is like, you know,
what are we doing right now? So it's a slap
(43:05):
in the face. So we want to conquer unforgiveness, and
we need to go to those spots again and ask
the Holy Spirit to help us be willing, first of all,
to obey God. It's not a it's not a suggestion,
it's a command. We must forgive.
S2 (43:19):
And I'm laughing because I've been there. I have, and.
S3 (43:23):
We all have.
S2 (43:24):
We've all been there. We have where we see the person. And,
you know, we were just praising God. Hallelujah! Thank you Jesus.
And singing songs and worshiping along with people. And then
we see that person. It's just like all that praise
and worship and joy just goes out the window.
S3 (43:41):
Oh, no. Where did God go? Where did the Lord go?
S2 (43:46):
Where did the Holy Spirit go? What happened to all
that hand raise? And that's hand clapping and stuff like that.
And it's funny how the Holy Spirit will be like, um,
I think you need to deal with this. That's right.
I really do. And so it's it's more than a notion.
And yet it sets you free, doesn't it?
S3 (44:04):
Absolutely it does. And that's that's what God wants for us.
He wants us to live, not visit, live in the freedom.
He died for a gruesome death.
S5 (44:15):
He.
S3 (44:15):
Died for it. He wants you to enjoy freedom now. It.
You have to do the work. All right. You have
to do the work. But freedom is our portion. Take it.
S2 (44:26):
Hmm? Hmm. I'm really inspired by your words today. And,
you know, people have called in, they haven't jumped on
the air, but they have called and said, I thank
God for the music. I thank God for the words
of encouragement concerning, um, the loss of, of children and
what that's meant to them, that someone else would talk
about that openly. But I also believe that there are
(44:48):
people right now who are like, well, wait a minute.
You mean I could come out of darkness? I could
come out of the shadows and walk in the light
of love, of grace and forgiveness? I don't have to
carry the burden of guilt, shame and unforgiveness. Are you serious?
And for that person that's listening right now, my show. Um.
Just talk to them for a second, will you, please?
S3 (45:10):
It is possible to walk through the fires of life
and not come out smelling like smoke. It is possible.
And the Lord made it, made it to where it
is possible. And so life comes at us fast. It
knocks the wind out of us. It is tough. It
can be unfair, all the things. But the Lord said, listen,
take heart. I've overcome the world, the entire world. And
(45:32):
if you hang with me, I'll make sure. I'll make
sure that you too can do the same. And that's
why we cling to him. That's why he's our closest friend.
That's why he's our greatest love. Because as we're connected
to him, I don't care what comes our way. We
can overcome. We're built for it.
S2 (45:48):
Wow. That's great. Absolutely great. I agree with you wholeheartedly. Hey,
if people want to reach out to you, how can
they do it?
S3 (45:55):
Oh, I'd love to meet people. So my show music,
my music, um, on Instagram, my show music, and then
my show. wilkins.com. I would love to see you at
my website as well. I just look forward to meeting
all of your sweet, sweet, sweet hearts.
S2 (46:11):
Name of the book one more time.
S3 (46:13):
Arise, shine and conquer.
S2 (46:18):
You got to see it just like that.
S3 (46:19):
Come on. That's right.
S2 (46:22):
All right, Michelle, we have enjoyed having you with us today.
Thank you so much for sharing your heart, sharing your journey. And, uh,
you love Jesus. You're Mary, wonderful husband. And is it
two kids? How many children now?
S3 (46:35):
Two. Two sons that tear up my house in super loud,
but I love.
S2 (46:38):
I heard them in the background.
S3 (46:40):
Yes.
S2 (46:41):
Thank God for him. It's a joyful noise. Amen.
S3 (46:44):
That's right, that's right.
S2 (46:45):
Thank you for being with us, sister. Bless you.
S3 (46:47):
My pleasure. God bless you as well.
S2 (46:49):
God bless you. Hey, I'm Roy Patterson, sitting in for
Chris Brooks. What a joy it is to hang out
with you. I hope you're enjoying this day. It is
the day the Lord has made. And you and I
have a right to rejoice and be glad in it.
Equipped with Chris Brooks is a production of the Moody
Radio Network under the umbrella of the Moody Bible Institute.
I'll see you soon. God bless.
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