May 14, 2024 • 41 mins
When ordained minister Jerry Snavely opened up about his arduous journey through adoption, it was a reminder of the sheer tenacity of the human spirit. He and his wife transformed their trials into a celebration of family and faith, a story that's both moving and inspirational.
Our conversation with Jerry brings to light the intimate dance between prayer and action, showing that divine communication is much more than a monologue—it's a heart-to-heart with the universe that guides us through the stormiest of times. From the gripping narrative of a youth pastor's fostering journey to the complexities of kinship care faced by adoptive parents, we unravel tales of resilience, sacrifice, and unexpected turns that challenge and enrich one's faith.
Be sure to follow us for ongoing support and insights into living a life anchored in faith, no matter where that journey may lead. Jerry's story, and those like it, stand as a testament to the power of unwavering hope and the profound impact of opening our hearts to the children of our communities.
Note: Music in this episode includes "I'm Saying Yes" by Beza and "Our Time" by Bex. Both songs are licensed for Faith Beyond use through PremiumBeat.com.
Host Tim Maceyko is an author, coach, and motivational speaker. His publications include "When the Cardinal Calls," "Child Loss 101," and "Seth's Snuggle Time Game," all available for purchase on Amazon. For book signings, speaking events, or media interviews, he can be reached at TimMaceyko@gmail.com.
Disclaimer: The Faith Beyond with Tim Maceyko Podcast is intended purely for informational, educational, inspirational, or entertainment purposes. The views expressed by guests are their own and may not reflect those of Faith Beyond. Listeners should independently verify any presented information and draw their own conclusions. Episodes discussing fitness and health are intended to examine various ideas that might offer health advantages. Faith Beyond with Tim Maceyko neither endorses any specific viewpoint nor advocates for any particular fitness or health regimen. It is recommended that individuals seek advice from their healthcare providers before initiating any new fitness or health plan. Comments made by host Tim Maceyko are presented to the listeners from a coaching standpoint, as he is not a licensed counselor or physician. The host's remarks are intended for inspirational and motivational purposes only.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Intro (00:03):
Beyond the pain, beyond the adversity, beyond this life.
It's Faith Beyond, author,coach and Faith Beyond founder.
Tim Maseko explores grief, loss, overcoming adversity and so
much more.
The Faith Beyond podcast startsnow.
Tim Maceyko (00:24):
Hey, Tim Maceyko here.
Welcome to another edition ofFaith Beyond.
Boy, I am ready to go.
Today, I've got Jerry Snavelywith me, and Jerry is an awesome
guy.
We are going to be talkingabout his amazing story, some of
the difficulties with it, andhow an adoption went from a
difficult moment to a place ofjoy and wonder.
(00:45):
So, Jerry's going to share hisstory with us, but before we do,
as always, I like to kind ofkick things off with something a
little positive.
So today I'm bringing you fivethings that you can do to keep
the faith after you face sometrauma, turmoil, or difficulty
in your life.
, Jerry, welcome to the show.
Jerry Snavely (01:05):
It's great to be with you and a neat office that
you have here, that you have setup to do this podcast.
I'm just very impressed.
So glad to be here and thanksfor having me.
Tim Maceyko (01:16):
I'm glad you made it.
Yeah, you actually came intothe studio.
Not a lot of people are able tocome to the studio just because
a lot of them are remote andout of state in different places
.
But I'm glad you're local andwe set this up and got you in
here.
Yeah, it turned out pretty wellafter some time and money and
effort, but it's a nice littlehome studio.
So, Jerry, you are an ordainedminister.
(01:36):
First of all, let's talk aboutthat before we really get too
far into things.
Jerry Snavely (01:41):
Yeah, basically I grew up in church.
church.
Uh, maybe some of you will beable to relate to that.
Uh, some of you that'll beforeign and that's fine, but
yeah, I just grew up in church.
L earning to fall in love withthe L ord and maybe, like a lot
of people, spent a little bit oftime in those teenage years
doing what we would all consider, uh, the foolish years a little
bit.
(02:01):
Maybe I didn't walk the faith,looking back, like I would have
loved to have done.
Um, but eventually kind of gotthat ship straightened out a
little bit, spent time at biblecollege studying then ordained.
I was basically doing youthministry.
Uh, my whole life, I neverreally had a preaching ministry.
(02:22):
I just always focused on theyoung people and that.
But yeah, that's been my mainvocation for the past several
years.
Here of late, I still do thaton a part-time basis, but I have
a full-time painting vocationnow as well.
Tim Maceyko (02:38):
You do a great job on the painting.
I said I was going to get aquote from you before you leave
here today for my hallway.
Jerry Snavely (02:45):
There you go.
Tim Maceyko (02:47):
So, you're a minister.
I was going to ask thatquestion to you too.
But before you get too far intothis, at what stage of the of
the game so someone out therelistening and they're maybe
feeling that kind of a callinglike how did you know?
Like that's where I was meantto be.
Jerry Snavely (03:01):
Yeah, and what age did you realize that?
I mean, that's, that's a goodquestion.
Um, I would really tell you toothat there isn't an answer.
That's pat.
You know, someone can feelcalled to that at a very young
age.
Um, someone may get called tothat in their 30s, you just
never.
I mean, the lord's timing isthe lord's and his call on your
(03:25):
life is his personal call onyour life.
He doesn't live in a box and hedoesn't put you in a box, and
so for me, I would just simplytell you, or anyone that's going
to be listening is just listento him and see.
And ministry also takes on allkinds of different shapes and
forms and sizes.
(03:45):
Yeah, there's ordainedministers who are preaching in
pulpits and working in churches.
We need those, but we also needministers who are janitors, who
are teachers, who are justamongst the people, and so don't
always just get simply caughtup in the fact that I have to be
an ordained minister tominister.
(04:06):
We're all called to beministers, we're all called to
share the gospel.
We're all shared, called toshare the love of jesus christ,
and so with that, I would justsay, man, when you just feel the
lord's leading and he's openingup a door for you to walk
through.
Whatever that may look through.
I would just encourage you towalk through it.
That may look through.
Tim Maceyko (04:23):
I would just encourage you to walk through it
, fair enough, fair enough.
So people that listen to thisshow I think mostly are probably
Christian oriented.
I feel pretty confident insaying that, although I think we
probably have some other peoplewho are struggling with that
because of the circumstance theywent through, and maybe they
say, yeah, I don't buy into itor whatever, and that's fine.
That's fine If you're.
I don't buy into it or whatever, and that's fine, that's fine
(04:45):
if you're listening.
Don't run away from this episode, right?
We want to still have thoseconversations and I think it's
valuable to always look at awide variety of the way things
may or may not be Like.
None of us have all the answers, but we try to educate
ourselves and embrace what wefeel strongly about.
So today, jerry, let's kickthings off just by talking about
(05:11):
these five things to help keepthe faith, and this can mean
keeping the faith in the senseof God and Jesus and all the
Christianity type things, butalso this may mean keep the
faith as in don't lose hope fromwherever you're at in your life
, because maybe you'restruggling right now.
So I think these five thingsare really valuable, so let's go
over them.
Number one is to well, it comesto number five actually.
But is love?
Love one another, love yourself, love.
Jerry Snavely (05:31):
Yeah, I mean foundational, um, cornerstone
type stuff.
Uh, with love, um, you know,without love, I mean you do you
feel lonely, you feel you feelisolated, you feel desolate, you
feel empty.
And love is really just thecornerstone of not just your
(05:51):
faith religiously, but just alsojust in life.
And once again, god, you knowif you want to go to scripture,
you know he was asked, you knowwhat's the greatest commandment?
He said love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, your mind
, soul and strength.
And then he says but thesecond's like it love your
neighbor as yourself.
And so god gives us love, godwants us to love him.
But he also realizes what theworld really does need is love,
(06:14):
just to show someone that youcare and that you're invested in
them.
Tim Maceyko (06:19):
And that can just make a total, radical difference
in someone's life is just thatthey feel loved I was talking to
a father the other day who Igot in touch with from someone
listening to the podcast,reached out to me and said hey,
my brother, brother-in-law, oneor the other, forget exactly,
but this relation lost his child.
(06:40):
It was on a four-wheeler,basically, and it flipped,
wrecked and the childunfortunately passed.
And a lot of guilt and a lot ofstruggle and I think for men,
you know, we don't like to go totherapy, we don't like to go to
groups and talk in these groups, right, and and so it was very,
(07:00):
I was very blessed that he waswilling to call me and and have
a conversation one-on-one,because he was struggling and
I'm not a minister, I'm not adoctor, I'm just a guy who went
through something similar, andso we were able to connect and
he said something about thislove thing right here.
He said you know, if it wasn'tfor my wife and the rest of the
(07:21):
family, I don't think I wouldmake it, I don't think I'd be
here, and so I think the pointI'm making here is this If
you're out there right now andyou're struggling and we're
talking about the things thathelp you, keep the faith, love
to me is number one.
I mean the bottom line, becauseif you have that love and you
understand that you still havemore to life, it's going to get
better, there's going to bebetter days.
(07:42):
Just hold on to that love andthat passion you have for those
around you.
Don't give up on that.
All right, number four it comesin.
Number four, it says just move,move, get out and do something
with yourself.
Yeah.
Jerry Snavely (07:55):
No, I would echo that and I would agree with it
and I enjoy doing thatpersonally.
As I mentioned, I paintvocationally.
Now is what I do for 40 hours aweek or so, so very active in
that, a lot of ups and downs inthe days of a life of a painter,
but anyway I get out and moveand above and beyond that, I
referee basketball in thewintertime months, and so I like
(08:17):
to get out and do that andenjoy that part of it and then,
just to be ready for that,through the off season I'll get
out and run some and then dosome exercising just at home
just to try to stay fit, and soI would encourage you too that
it really does do your mind wellto have your body doing well.
And once again, to me, if wedon't use that, we do tend to
(08:40):
lose it and it can maybe helpwith some aches and pains and
different things that you mightbe having If you just get out
and move and use that body thatGod gave you.
And because we are a prettysedentary lifestyle anymore,
with a lot of the jobs thatdifferent people have, and I
think as a result of that, wejust don't feel good because we
don't move.
So yeah, I echo that man getout and move, find something to
(09:03):
do, have fun with it.
Tim Maceyko (09:05):
Absolutely, I agree , and I think I'm going to do a
separate episode on.
Someone's going to come in andtalk about fitness and exercise
the whole enchilada.
So we'll talk about another one.
And then also I got anotherepisode coming up later about
connecting to nature and whatthey call grounding, where
you're barefoot and justconnecting yeah, so grounding
where you're barefoot and justconnecting.
Yeah, so some cool stuff thereand we'll talk about that.
(09:25):
Other shows, uh, but numberthree today is on the list.
Jerry Snavely (09:28):
Be kind, be kind to yourself and be kind to those
around you yeah um, I mean,that's just once again it can
really dovetail off of love,because love is, you know,
exhibiting kindness.
And to me, as we think aboutthis, once again, if we just
simply look at scripture and itjust talks about you know, how
do you want to treat people theway you want to be treated?
(09:49):
Yeah, and so if we can justsimply learn it, man, how would
the world look different if wecould adopt that, if I would
just simply treat someone theway I wanted to be treated.
I realize it's a lot easier tosay that than do it.
We have bad days, we havedifficult times and sometimes
we're just grumpy, but if we canlearn to just try to be more
(10:10):
kind, just what a difference itwould be and uh and just putting
a smile on someone's face andthen you end up having a smile
on your face just because we'rekind.
Tim Maceyko (10:20):
So yep, be kind to one another one thing I'd add on
that too, is I talked to a girlon a different episode, young
lady, and she was just reallyhard on herself and I asked her
I said well, you know, if yourfriend came in and they put on
100 pounds you haven't seen himfor two years and uh, would you,
would you tell them they're fat?
She said, well, no, I wouldnever do that.
(10:41):
I'm like well, would you tellyour friend who failed a test
they're stupid?
She's like I would never dothat.
I'm like well, would you tellyour friend who failed a test
that they're stupid?
She's like no, I would never dothat.
I'm like.
Then, why are you so hard onyourself, like it's so hard?
Sometimes we're harder onourselves and we need to be kind
to ourselves as well.
Jerry Snavely (10:55):
Yeah, I mean, and it's good to have expectations
of ourselves and to have goalsand to want to do well, but at
the same time, sometimes wedon't do everything well,
sometimes we have bad days andand it's okay.
Um, and, like I say, just be alittle forgiving and and move on
and a tomorrow can be a betterday, and just to try to handle
(11:15):
situations better, or whateverit might be.
I like it.
Tim Maceyko (11:18):
Uh, number two is be thankful.
Gratitude.
Jerry Snavely (11:22):
Yeah, man, just an attitude of gratitude.
Um, I know we have a a thingthat we have said with all of
our children.
It's basically this anytimeanybody does anything for you,
say thank you.
Anytime anybody does anythingfor you, be thankful.
And the reason we just simplywant to do that is it then
(11:44):
becomes not what you do, itbecomes who you are.
Yeah, and I become a thankfulperson.
Thank you for having me heretoday, thank you for doing this,
thank you for opening up thedoor for me, thank you for doing
that and thank you for supper,thank you for doing the dishes,
thank you for and, if it may,just all of a sudden, it's like
I'll become a thankful personand if we can just learn to
(12:05):
maybe look at things throughthat lens, then maybe we can be
a little more of a betterattitude and being happy with
what's going on and having alittle gratitude in our lives.
Tim Maceyko (12:14):
I agree.
I agree, and sometimes too,again, when you're suffering out
there and you're feeling downand it's hard to be thankful,
but remember what you should bethankful for, for things you do
have.
We focus on the things thatwe've lost, things we don't have
, and it's a natural reaction,but, in order to keep the faith,
think about the things you dohave and be thankful for them,
(12:35):
whether it's your health or yourloved ones or whatever's left
in your life.
Jerry Snavely (12:40):
Classic, good old story that go along with that
is the guy who complained abouthaving or needing new shoes to
the gentleman who had no feet.
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Maceyko (12:50):
Yeah.
Jerry Snavely (12:51):
Yeah, you know, and you're sitting and think, oh
, wow, and sometimes we do, andI don't know some people listen
to us.
I mean you've experienced greatgrief but at the same time, you
typically don't have to looktoo far down the road to find
someone who has gone throughmore, and so, yeah, you just be
grateful for where you're at,absolutely.
Tim Maceyko (13:09):
Number one is to keep the faith is pray.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Yeah.
Jerry Snavely (13:14):
Yeah, just um, just praying and just, uh,
talking to the Lord.
Um, he I mean, if I believescripture, he knows what's going
on anyway he knows.
He just simply desires to havea relationship with you.
He desires to have you conveyto him everything that's going
on with you.
One thing you have to realizeis he has very broad shoulders
(13:35):
and you're not going to offendhim If you're going through a
difficult time or through aseason that you simply don't
understand.
He can handle you saying, god,I am not happy with you right
now, and he would say I get it,you're going through a rough
time, I understand it.
Just give him everything.
Just give it to him, let himsort it out.
(13:57):
The biggest thing is just havingthat communication, talking to
him, but then being willing tolisten, being willing to have
patience, being willing tounderstand that he sees the big
picture.
You're only seeing a littleglimpse of it right now and
perhaps in time you'll look backat this season and you'll be
(14:20):
able to see the whys and thehows and the what bores.
That right now just isn'tmaking any sense to you.
Um, but just talk to him aboutit.
Talk to him about everything.
That's what he wants you to do.
Yeah, I love that.
Tim Maceyko (14:36):
I love that, and and you know, steve harvey, the
comedian, said he does this.
He said he you know he lives inthe morning, but he said very
first two things.
He does is he meditates, helistens and then he prays.
He talks, so he listens forthose messages and then he prays
on what he thinks he needs torespond with and ask for and
(14:58):
pray for the health of othersand those types of things.
So I think that's reallyprofound, the idea of listen and
talk to him both.
I think that's a great idea.
Okay, well, I'll tell you whatthat's a great list, a great way
to kick things off, a way tokeep the faith, five things you
can do.
So, if you're struggling, thinkabout it, and hopefully you'll
feel a little bit better.
(15:18):
We're going to take our breakwhen we come back, though.
I'm going to let Jerry talkabout his story and the story of
adoption and how it kind of wasa rollercoaster ride for you,
and you really questioned somethings, but it all turned out
wonderful, didn't it?
Amen, yes, sir, we'll do thatright after the song of the week
.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
This is Tim Maseko with Jerry Snavely and you're
listening to Faith Beyond outtoday.
Cause the good things coming myway Pay my dues.
I deserve a break.
Gonna, look up to heaven.
(15:58):
Yeah, I'm expecting blessingshere today.
I'm saying yes to better days.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, I'm saying yes To betterdays.
Yes, I'm on my way.
(16:19):
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, climbed a mountain justto see the top.
Looking down now see how farI've come.
Gonna, take a deep breath.
Enjoy while I can.
The best is yet to come Causethe good things coming my way
Pay my dues.
I deserve a break.
(16:39):
Gonna, look up to heaven.
Yeah, I'm expecting blessingshere today.
I'm saying yes to better days.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, I'm saying yes to betterdays.
Yes, I'm on my way.
(17:01):
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, all that's left is tohave a little fun.
Never be too serious and numb,cause life is too short to stay
up on the shore.
Gonna, dive into the sun, causethe good things come in my way.
(17:30):
Bye.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, I'm saying yes to betterdays.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Tim Maceyko (17:47):
Yeah, all right, we are back and again I got jerry
snavely with me.
He's an ordained minister andwhat's?
(18:08):
What's school did you go to forthat like?
cincinnati bible college, whichis no longer even in existence,
sadly, wow yeah, schools comeand go, though right yeah,
unfortunately it it does um, andalso you know we're talking
earlier, we're talking aboutmoving in our list of five
things.
You mentioned the fact you'rean official and, yeah, you were
recognized this year in ohio aswhat the girls basketball
(18:28):
official of the year for thewhole state.
Is that right?
That?
Jerry Snavely (18:32):
is.
It was a very humbling, uh,very surprising and uh it was.
It was a very unique honor anduh and appreciate it, but also
very humbled by it, because Iknow there are a lot of great
officials in the state of ohio,so to be recognized that way was
.
I actually laughed when I firstsaw the letter.
It's like you gotta be kiddingme.
Tim Maceyko (18:53):
No, I think it's great, I mean you know,
obviously I coached, yeah, andso this is one of the ways I
know jerry is from.
Uh, you officiated many of myhigh school girls basketball
games when I was coaching and,and, uh, I always, always
objectively, thought it's notjust because you're sitting in
the studio, but I always saidthat you were one of the best,
like consistent, and you wouldexplain things and you, you know
(19:14):
, whether I agree with the callor not made no difference.
You're very on point with itand you just really embrace
people in a manner that makes iteasy to talk to, and I think
that goes a long way yeah, yep.
Jerry Snavely (19:25):
I mean, hey, we, we get most of them right, some
of them we don't.
And if I didn't felt like I gotit right, I'm going to tell you
that, and if you didn't feltlike I got it right, I'm just
going to simply say well, thisis what I saw yeah, well, and
from a coaching perspective, Ialways had the right answer, the
official, you know, sometimesthey.
Intro (19:43):
They got it wrong.
Tim Maceyko (19:44):
I always had it right yeah that's how it works
exactly exactly you need that.
W yeah, yeah, I always saidofficiating is the toughest job
because you make half the gymmad, no matter what your call is
Exactly.
Jerry Snavely (19:56):
Exactly Yep, for sure.
Tim Maceyko (19:59):
All right.
Well, let's get into your storynow.
I think this is an importantthing to share, and I noticed my
dogs are coming and going outof their rooms.
So if people hear a littleclacking here and there, I
apologize.
But you know the wife is goneand the dogs are active, so I
keep hearing them in myheadphones.
So I I apologize if you hearthat, but it is what it is.
Um, that's the joy ofpodcasting from your home studio
(20:20):
.
There you go, there you go, butlet's go ahead and talk about
it.
So you weren't looking to adoptyeah or anything like that,
right once this all came aboutyeah, not at all.
Jerry Snavely (20:28):
Um, just to give you some, where I'm at, I'm 56
years old now, so when thisstory started back in 2019, you
can do the math at the age I was.
And so just to try to get youto what's going on, we have
another family in the churchthat does foster care and they
would take in a lot of timesteenagers, and at that time I
(20:50):
was the youth pastor.
So they would bring in youngpeople into their home and as
youth pastor, I would meet themat church and just introduce
myself and invite them to youthgroup and things of that nature.
With this one particular Sundayin February of 19, they bring
in this young lady into theirhome and and I see her at church
and I go up and introducemyself to her and little did I
know.
(21:10):
She came in tow at that timewith a two-month-old little guy
and she was 15 at the time.
And so I just do like I didwith all the kids and just
struck up a conversation, got toknow her a little bit and
invited her to youth group, andshe says, well, what do I do
with him?
I says, was he yours?
She said, yeah, well, then youbring him.
(21:30):
And so she did.
She came that night and shebrought this little guy to youth
group with us and, and so wejust started this relationship
with her and and, just like wewould any other young person
that comes to church, you justtry to love on and meet them
where they're at and do whateveryou can.
So it's not very long into therelationship with her and having
them at youth group, we kind ofrealized she's in over her head
(21:51):
, as you could imagine, being a15-year-old single mom.
So we just build thisrelationship with her.
My wife gets a phone call acouple months later from the
foster mom and she says thisyoung lady is going to ask you
and Jerry to take her baby.
And Debra's like what?
(22:13):
And so this is what she's goingto do.
And so I'm at work and so Debracalls me and informs me of this
and I'm like, wait, what didyou say?
She's going to ask us to takeher baby.
She wants us to become thelegal guardians of this little
boy.
And obviously it's like youknow sometimes you say, hey, can
you handle the curveball?
(22:33):
We didn't even know we wereplaying the game.
That's how far out of leftfield this came.
So I hang up with my wife, andso I just start praying.
I just you know, man, lord,this is wow.
And so I just start praying andjust asking and and and, and.
There was a few different timesin this story where I would tell
you that I I heard the voice ofthe lord and never really been
(22:55):
an audible thing for me, it'sjust more of a impressed upon my
spirit.
But as I'm praying, he simplygives me three words, and the
three words were simply selfish,selfless, choose.
And so I start contemplatingthose words.
Lord, what do you mean?
(23:16):
We have three grown children,and the youngest at that time
was just getting ready tograduate college.
We were literally like monthsaway of being empty nesters and
we had saved money to do alittle traveling and whatever.
And to me it was just simplylike the lord was saying hey,
you had your plans, if you wantto do that, just go and do it.
But it's kind of being selfish,or you can simply be selfish.
(23:38):
So I just prayed about it and Isimply decided that, yeah, we
could go see stuff or we couldmake a difference in someone's
life, and so that's what wedecided to do.
And so she, uh, gave us thislittle guy and, uh, we had him
for 10 days in our home whenhe's four months old.
Well then, the day before we goto court to um, have this
(24:00):
become legal guardians?
She changes her mind and, uh,she says I want him back.
And so she comes and get himand, uh, and that was fine, I.
But I just simply asked her youknow what's changed?
You gave him to us because youknew you couldn't care for him.
What's changed in 10 days?
And she just simply said I justwant to be his mom.
(24:20):
Okay, that's fine.
So we gave him back and shewent, and so we just continued
to build this relationship andlove on him the best we could,
and we did that.
Unfortunately for the young lady, come November of 2019, she'd
made some poor choices inbetween there as well, but then
the biggest poor decision shemade came in November of 2019.
(24:44):
And she actually left with Kaiof the foster home and went away
on a Saturday, and then so thefoster parents came to church on
Sunday morning and theyinformed us.
She ran away, she took him andthey're gone.
And so, obviously, you're just,you're you just?
You're just running the gammaof fear, hope, um man, just pray
(25:10):
and they're okay.
So we go over to the home, uh,after church and we just spend
the afternoon there.
I have to run and do someerrands to get things ready for
youth group that night and asI'm coming back from kroger, I'm
pulling into the road that theylive on and I see this young
lady and the baby and she'swalking down the road to get
(25:31):
back home, and so I I just driveup and I get him and put him in
the car, and it's November andthe little guy, he doesn't even
have a coat on, and I justremember that they just got in
the front seat with me.
But it was so incredible, hiseyes and my eyes met and it was
(25:53):
literally like I could look intohis soul and and we just
connected.
So we, we take him back home orback to the foster home, and
and we realize at that pointthat you know she's going to
lose him, you know they're goingto, they're going to take him.
So I just told my wife, hey,get out in front of this, we
don't want him going into fostercare, we'll take him in a
kinship relationship, and and sothat's what we do, we take him
(26:15):
into our home, and then shedecides to let us adopt him and
really I know we don't have awhole lot of time here, but
we're willing to do anything tohelp her.
We have been willing to adopther and we start that process
because we want them to staytogether, we want them to be a
family.
(26:38):
But as we start that process ofadopting her just to keep it
short, basically just we justweren't going to offer to her
the lifestyle she wanted to live, and it's like she wanted it
for kai, but she didn't want itfor herself and she just wasn't
willing to do that.
So she went the direction shewanted to go and and chose to go
, and so we ended up with Kaiand she wanted us to adopt him
(26:59):
all along.
So we proceeded with that andwe were once again two weeks
away to go to court for anuncontested adoption.
And she changes her mind andshe comes back in and says no, I
want to, I want to, so we haveto.
And you might say at this pointwell, that's why would you not
(27:22):
want her to have her son?
And it wasn't that we didn't,and we were willing to work with
her once again.
I mean, if you can, if you canchange and you can do things and
and, but she just it was justtoxic.
And I guess sometimes, aslistening to this story, you
just have to believe that weknow things about her that you
(27:42):
don't know as listeners rightnow, and you just have to trust
us that we felt we were fightingfor his, literally fighting for
his life, to keep him safe yeah, let me interject here, jerry,
just because I I know that, um,you know that did uh, I don't
want to say this.
Tim Maceyko (28:01):
I worked at children's services for a little
while, for about a year, and itwas a temporary layover between
that and my next position inlife, but I worked with a lot of
foster kids and foster youthand that was kind of one of my
roles and so I definitely, youknow, saw what you're talking
about and so if you're listening, it's easy, when you don't see
(28:23):
those things, to think, well,yeah, you want to back with the
parent and in theory you do,because that's a hard thing for
a child to not be with theparent.
But when you see a parent who'sstruggling, who maybe has an
addiction or whatever the casemay be, sometimes it's just you
have to do what you got to do,and it's never a good thing,
(28:48):
it's never an easy thing, butyou have to think about what's
best for the child at that point.
And, and boy, I've seen somereally heartbreaking cases and
it sounds like this is kind ofone of those where I think the
mom wanted him, but yet shewanted what was better for him,
but yet she didn't want to givehim up, you know, and she knew,
knew.
I'm sure she knew that she wasin a position that she couldn't
(29:08):
do it, yet it was just the ideaof making it a permanent move
every time probably just got toher yeah I think that's really
what it was.
Jerry Snavely (29:16):
I think that's a great way to to state it was.
Did she love him?
Yes, could she give him whatshe needed to give him?
She knew she couldn't right,but at the at, so that she was,
there was literally thiswrestling match going on inside
(29:36):
of her absolutely and uh, and wegot that and we understood it,
but we still, we just feared forhim absolutely and uh, and that
was where we were at, and sowhat ended up happening is then
we ended up having to go througha contested adoption.
And you might be saying, some ofyou are about to say, isn't
(29:56):
there a dad involved in this?
Well, of course there is.
And, once again, this is justthe sadness of the story.
If you remember the young lady,she was 15 when we met her, so
she was pregnant at 14.
And the guy who was with herwas 26 at the time when that
happened, and so he's actuallyin prison.
(30:17):
It was literally just anabsolute roller coaster ride of
emotion.
Ride of emotion because whenshe came back to to contest,
well then, as they should, theytried to give her every right to
earn him back, and so we justhad to prepare ourselves, you
(30:38):
know, for that.
But she, just she couldn't, she, she came back for the first
court hearing and never showedup again and just never came
back any time.
And so there was just thislitany of things that had to
happen, and we talked aboutpraying earlier and we prayed so
(31:01):
hard for this little guy, youknow, and it was, it was just
praying for his protection.
We did Jericho walks around thecourthouse, and you may or may
not be familiar with that, butit's just simply a story from
the Bible where, basically, godwins the battle just by the
Israelites walking around thecity of Jericho and he knocks
(31:23):
the walls down.
And so we just prayed, lord,this is your victory to win,
this is your battle to win, andand it's just to protect kai and
um, and he did it was.
There was just so manymiraculous things, even on the
jericho walk.
Um, we did it.
(31:44):
So we walked around the thecourthouse seven different
sundays uh, six of them.
We walked one time and then theseventh.
So we walked around thecourthouse seven different
Sundays, six of them.
We walked one time and then theseventh one.
We walked seven laps around,just like they did in the Bible
story.
And the seventh time around, orthe seventh Sunday, there was
about 100 people showed up fromour church to walk with us.
And as we're walking around theseventh lap, we're going to
(32:07):
sing a couple praise songs atthe end of this Jericho walk,
but right in front of thecourthouse, as we're getting
ready to go up to sing, I heardthe Lord speak to me again and
he said don't pray to me to winit.
Praise me because I've won it,and one of our elders was
(32:28):
literally just a few stepsbehind me and not at the same
time but at the same place, infront of the courthouse.
He said he got a word from theLord and it simply was I hear
you, I hear you, I hear yourprayers, you've won.
And it's just like like therewere still hurdles, there were
(32:52):
still bumps in the road.
By the time we were done, Iweigh 185 pounds today.
By the time we were done, Iweighed 169 pounds.
At the actual adoption, Iweighed 169 pounds.
At the actual adoption, Iweighed 169 pounds.
Just, you literally anguishedfor him.
(33:16):
We fought for him like we wereliterally saving his life.
Yeah, because we felt we were.
Yeah, and we did.
It was just overwhelming tofeel God's presence.
But I guess what I would like tosay to your listeners is this
(33:37):
it wasn't all mountaintops.
There were so many valleys andit was just the ups and downs
and just God's faithfulnessthrough it.
And that's the part I thinksometimes we lose is we think
well, maybe because I'm afollower of Christ, it's just
all mountaintops and it's allrose petals.
No, it's not, because what Itell people today and I believe
(34:02):
it with all my heart.
God knew I needed to fight forhim heart.
God knew I needed to fight forhim to learn to love him the way
I needed to love him.
Had I not had to fight for him,I don't know that I would have
loved him to the inch degreethat I do today Because of the
fight.
(34:22):
So many mornings I would wakeup and I would pray and I would
just cry, I'd just sob for him.
Lord, protect him.
I can honestly tell you todaythat Kai Wade Snavely is my son.
I love him as much as all mynatural-born girls.
(34:47):
Nothing will ever change that.
He's a little biracial guy.
He's my son In every insta-gree, even though everyone that
looks at us says there ain't noway.
Tim Maceyko (35:05):
I say Yahweh.
Jerry Snavely (35:06):
And if you know anything about scripture, our
Lord is known as Yahweh, yeah,yeah, I'll say Yahweh.
And if you know anything aboutscripture, our Lord is known as
Yahweh yeah, the provider.
So is he, my son, yahweh?
And God made a way and that'sexactly what he did, and he just
saw to protect him, and sothat's where we're at in our
story.
Tim Maceyko (35:24):
I've seen your Facebook posts and he just got
out of basketball season.
It looked like he was having ablast.
Yep, looks like he's healthyand happy and really thriving.
Yeah, so that's that's.
That's a tremendous testamentto having faith and and and
thanks for sharing that.
I think that's going tohopefully help some people by
(35:45):
hearing that story and realizingthat you know the highs and
lows.
They come and go and it flowslike that.
You know, we are actuallytechnically out of time, but I'm
going to take just one moreminute because I want to ask you
one question from a you know,from a Christian standpoint.
Yeah, people out therelistening may say you know, well
(36:08):
, I lost someone I loved or Igot this cancer diagnosis
terminal.
You know, whatever the case maybe and the easy thing to say,
the most common thing to say isI was a Christian.
I went to you know church everySunday and, my God, where are
you now, when I needed you themost?
You've abandoned me and nowhere, you've left me distraught
(36:33):
and tore apart, and I'm on thefloor.
What do you say to those peopleLike how, how, what, what do we
tell them?
Jerry Snavely (36:40):
Yeah, I mean, the biggest thing we have to
remember as humans is this bodyis a tent.
It is temporary.
As nice as this earth is and asbeautiful as it is, this is a
temporary home inside of eachand every one of us, somewhere.
I don't know how it works, Ican't explain it, I don't know
(37:00):
where it's at, but there is asoul that lives inside of every
person that God designed to livefor an eternity, not in this
place, but in a future home thatwill be a forever home.
Biggest thing we have tounderstand, guys none of us are
(37:20):
getting out of this world alive.
Unless the Lord chooses toreturn before we go, then there
will be a generation that theywon't taste.
That you know, because the Lordsays I'm coming back.
But what happens that we haveto understand is is this?
You were not created for thisworld?
We're, we're, we're aliens, andscripture tells us that we
(37:44):
should, we could be, we shouldbe like an alien in this world.
We are just simply passingthrough to our home.
So the biggest thing I can tellyou is prepare for that home,
be ready, and and that's thegoal of of us as a believer and
(38:04):
us as a church is to make youacutely aware that you are made
for an eternity and the only waythat scripture tells us that we
have an eternity forever inheaven is to put our faith in
jesus christ and and and accepthis grace through the, the blood
sacrifice on the cross and Iknow I'm getting pretty deep
(38:25):
here on you and and maybe, andit's like whoa, where's this guy
going with all this?
Reach out to tim.
I'll be happy to talk with youpersonally if you want to know
more.
Um, but how do we navigate thedifficult times?
Is just by simply realizingthis.
This is not my home.
Yeah, I was made.
(38:46):
I'm made for something bigger.
I'm made for something better,I'm made for something forever.
And, uh, doesn't make it easier, it's still.
It's still painful, I get it,but the comfort hopefully we can
have is just simply knowingthat jesus is there to help us
navigate that through hisleading of the holy spirit.
(39:07):
But I guess you know I gave youa long answer to simply this
this is not your home, brotheror sister, whoever is listening,
and just be ready for thefuture and just get there and
navigate this and navigate thehard times, but have your hope
in Jesus Christ, because that'sthe only way, at the end of the
(39:28):
day, that's going to be whereeverything's going to stand, is
in your faith in Jesus Christ.
Tim Maceyko (39:34):
Well said, jerry.
I appreciate the honest answerand everybody listen.
I hope you got a lot out oftoday's episode.
I know I've I've jot a fewthings out mentally that I'm
going to think about, and eventhe beginning of the show, the
five things we talked about tohelp you keep your faith, were
important, jerry.
Your journey with the adoptionwas amazing, and Jericho walks
(39:56):
and and and the the voice of Godspeaking to you in the way he
did, and so just veryinspirational, I think, for
hopefully a lot of people thatare listening, and so thanks for
being here, thanks for sharingpeople that are listening.
So thanks for being here,thanks for sharing.
Hey, thanks for having me.
And that'll do it for this week, and this is Tim Maseko, jerry
Snavely, and I will leave youwith this message you can
overcome any adversity in life.
(40:17):
Together, we can overcome, wecan achieve, we can go on and do
great things with the time wehave on this earth.
So go do it.
It's your time, it's my time.
Speaker 4 (40:39):
It's our time.
We don't stop here.
We keep on dreaming.
Set the goals and we willachieve them.
It's our time, it's our time.
It will make it count.
Oh, watch us close, cause wewill grow and become unstoppable
(41:02):
, become unstoppable.
Oh, we take our dreams and makethem real, cause nothing is
impossible.
It's our time, it's our timeand we'll make it count.
It's our lives, it's our livesand we'll live it loud.
We don't stop and we keep ondreaming.
(41:27):
Set the goals and we willachieve them.
It's a time, it's a time, andwe'll make it count.
It's a time, it's a time, andwe'll make it count.
Intro (41:39):
You've been listening to the Faith Beyond Podcast.
To subscribe to future episodesor to follow Tim's blog, go to
faithbeyondorg.
And you can find Faith Beyondwith Tim Maseko on Facebook,
instagram and Twitter.
Beyond the pain, beyond the adversity, beyond this life.
It's Faith Beyond, author,coach and Faith Beyond founder.
Tim Maseko explores grief, loss, overcoming adversity and so
much more.
The Faith Beyond podcast startsnow.
Tim Maceyko (00:24):
Hey, Tim Maceyko here.
Welcome to another edition ofFaith Beyond.
Boy, I am ready to go.
Today, I've got Jerry Snavelywith me, and Jerry is an awesome
guy.
We are going to be talkingabout his amazing story, some of
the difficulties with it, andhow an adoption went from a
difficult moment to a place ofjoy and wonder.
(00:45):
So, Jerry's going to share hisstory with us, but before we do,
as always, I like to kind ofkick things off with something a
little positive.
So today I'm bringing you fivethings that you can do to keep
the faith after you face sometrauma, turmoil, or difficulty
in your life.
, Jerry, welcome to the show.
Jerry Snavely (01:05):
It's great to be with you and a neat office that
you have here, that you have setup to do this podcast.
I'm just very impressed.
So glad to be here and thanksfor having me.
Tim Maceyko (01:16):
I'm glad you made it.
Yeah, you actually came intothe studio.
Not a lot of people are able tocome to the studio just because
a lot of them are remote andout of state in different places
.
But I'm glad you're local andwe set this up and got you in
here.
Yeah, it turned out pretty wellafter some time and money and
effort, but it's a nice littlehome studio.
So, Jerry, you are an ordainedminister.
(01:36):
First of all, let's talk aboutthat before we really get too
far into things.
Jerry Snavely (01:41):
Yeah, basically I grew up in church.
church.
Uh, maybe some of you will beable to relate to that.
Uh, some of you that'll beforeign and that's fine, but
yeah, I just grew up in church.
L earning to fall in love withthe L ord and maybe, like a lot
of people, spent a little bit oftime in those teenage years
doing what we would all consider, uh, the foolish years a little
bit.
(02:01):
Maybe I didn't walk the faith,looking back, like I would have
loved to have done.
Um, but eventually kind of gotthat ship straightened out a
little bit, spent time at biblecollege studying then ordained.
I was basically doing youthministry.
Uh, my whole life, I neverreally had a preaching ministry.
(02:22):
I just always focused on theyoung people and that.
But yeah, that's been my mainvocation for the past several
years.
Here of late, I still do thaton a part-time basis, but I have
a full-time painting vocationnow as well.
Tim Maceyko (02:38):
You do a great job on the painting.
I said I was going to get aquote from you before you leave
here today for my hallway.
Jerry Snavely (02:45):
There you go.
Tim Maceyko (02:47):
So, you're a minister.
I was going to ask thatquestion to you too.
But before you get too far intothis, at what stage of the of
the game so someone out therelistening and they're maybe
feeling that kind of a callinglike how did you know?
Like that's where I was meantto be.
Jerry Snavely (03:01):
Yeah, and what age did you realize that?
I mean, that's, that's a goodquestion.
Um, I would really tell you toothat there isn't an answer.
That's pat.
You know, someone can feelcalled to that at a very young
age.
Um, someone may get called tothat in their 30s, you just
never.
I mean, the lord's timing isthe lord's and his call on your
(03:25):
life is his personal call onyour life.
He doesn't live in a box and hedoesn't put you in a box, and
so for me, I would just simplytell you, or anyone that's going
to be listening is just listento him and see.
And ministry also takes on allkinds of different shapes and
forms and sizes.
(03:45):
Yeah, there's ordainedministers who are preaching in
pulpits and working in churches.
We need those, but we also needministers who are janitors, who
are teachers, who are justamongst the people, and so don't
always just get simply caughtup in the fact that I have to be
an ordained minister tominister.
(04:06):
We're all called to beministers, we're all called to
share the gospel.
We're all shared, called toshare the love of jesus christ,
and so with that, I would justsay, man, when you just feel the
lord's leading and he's openingup a door for you to walk
through.
Whatever that may look through.
I would just encourage you towalk through it.
That may look through.
Tim Maceyko (04:23):
I would just encourage you to walk through it
, fair enough, fair enough.
So people that listen to thisshow I think mostly are probably
Christian oriented.
I feel pretty confident insaying that, although I think we
probably have some other peoplewho are struggling with that
because of the circumstance theywent through, and maybe they
say, yeah, I don't buy into itor whatever, and that's fine.
That's fine If you're.
I don't buy into it or whatever, and that's fine, that's fine
(04:45):
if you're listening.
Don't run away from this episode, right?
We want to still have thoseconversations and I think it's
valuable to always look at awide variety of the way things
may or may not be Like.
None of us have all the answers, but we try to educate
ourselves and embrace what wefeel strongly about.
So today, jerry, let's kickthings off just by talking about
(05:11):
these five things to help keepthe faith, and this can mean
keeping the faith in the senseof God and Jesus and all the
Christianity type things, butalso this may mean keep the
faith as in don't lose hope fromwherever you're at in your life
, because maybe you'restruggling right now.
So I think these five thingsare really valuable, so let's go
over them.
Number one is to well, it comesto number five actually.
But is love?
Love one another, love yourself, love.
Jerry Snavely (05:31):
Yeah, I mean foundational, um, cornerstone
type stuff.
Uh, with love, um, you know,without love, I mean you do you
feel lonely, you feel you feelisolated, you feel desolate, you
feel empty.
And love is really just thecornerstone of not just your
(05:51):
faith religiously, but just alsojust in life.
And once again, god, you knowif you want to go to scripture,
you know he was asked, you knowwhat's the greatest commandment?
He said love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, your mind
, soul and strength.
And then he says but thesecond's like it love your
neighbor as yourself.
And so god gives us love, godwants us to love him.
But he also realizes what theworld really does need is love,
(06:14):
just to show someone that youcare and that you're invested in
them.
Tim Maceyko (06:19):
And that can just make a total, radical difference
in someone's life is just thatthey feel loved I was talking to
a father the other day who Igot in touch with from someone
listening to the podcast,reached out to me and said hey,
my brother, brother-in-law, oneor the other, forget exactly,
but this relation lost his child.
(06:40):
It was on a four-wheeler,basically, and it flipped,
wrecked and the childunfortunately passed.
And a lot of guilt and a lot ofstruggle and I think for men,
you know, we don't like to go totherapy, we don't like to go to
groups and talk in these groups, right, and and so it was very,
(07:00):
I was very blessed that he waswilling to call me and and have
a conversation one-on-one,because he was struggling and
I'm not a minister, I'm not adoctor, I'm just a guy who went
through something similar, andso we were able to connect and
he said something about thislove thing right here.
He said you know, if it wasn'tfor my wife and the rest of the
(07:21):
family, I don't think I wouldmake it, I don't think I'd be
here, and so I think the pointI'm making here is this If
you're out there right now andyou're struggling and we're
talking about the things thathelp you, keep the faith, love
to me is number one.
I mean the bottom line, becauseif you have that love and you
understand that you still havemore to life, it's going to get
better, there's going to bebetter days.
(07:42):
Just hold on to that love andthat passion you have for those
around you.
Don't give up on that.
All right, number four it comesin.
Number four, it says just move,move, get out and do something
with yourself.
Yeah.
Jerry Snavely (07:55):
No, I would echo that and I would agree with it
and I enjoy doing thatpersonally.
As I mentioned, I paintvocationally.
Now is what I do for 40 hours aweek or so, so very active in
that, a lot of ups and downs inthe days of a life of a painter,
but anyway I get out and moveand above and beyond that, I
referee basketball in thewintertime months, and so I like
(08:17):
to get out and do that andenjoy that part of it and then,
just to be ready for that,through the off season I'll get
out and run some and then dosome exercising just at home
just to try to stay fit, and soI would encourage you too that
it really does do your mind wellto have your body doing well.
And once again, to me, if wedon't use that, we do tend to
(08:40):
lose it and it can maybe helpwith some aches and pains and
different things that you mightbe having If you just get out
and move and use that body thatGod gave you.
And because we are a prettysedentary lifestyle anymore,
with a lot of the jobs thatdifferent people have, and I
think as a result of that, wejust don't feel good because we
don't move.
So yeah, I echo that man getout and move, find something to
(09:03):
do, have fun with it.
Tim Maceyko (09:05):
Absolutely, I agree , and I think I'm going to do a
separate episode on.
Someone's going to come in andtalk about fitness and exercise
the whole enchilada.
So we'll talk about another one.
And then also I got anotherepisode coming up later about
connecting to nature and whatthey call grounding, where
you're barefoot and justconnecting yeah, so grounding
where you're barefoot and justconnecting.
Yeah, so some cool stuff thereand we'll talk about that.
(09:25):
Other shows, uh, but numberthree today is on the list.
Jerry Snavely (09:28):
Be kind, be kind to yourself and be kind to those
around you yeah um, I mean,that's just once again it can
really dovetail off of love,because love is, you know,
exhibiting kindness.
And to me, as we think aboutthis, once again, if we just
simply look at scripture and itjust talks about you know, how
do you want to treat people theway you want to be treated?
(09:49):
Yeah, and so if we can justsimply learn it, man, how would
the world look different if wecould adopt that, if I would
just simply treat someone theway I wanted to be treated.
I realize it's a lot easier tosay that than do it.
We have bad days, we havedifficult times and sometimes
we're just grumpy, but if we canlearn to just try to be more
(10:10):
kind, just what a difference itwould be and uh and just putting
a smile on someone's face andthen you end up having a smile
on your face just because we'rekind.
Tim Maceyko (10:20):
So yep, be kind to one another one thing I'd add on
that too, is I talked to a girlon a different episode, young
lady, and she was just reallyhard on herself and I asked her
I said well, you know, if yourfriend came in and they put on
100 pounds you haven't seen himfor two years and uh, would you,
would you tell them they're fat?
She said, well, no, I wouldnever do that.
(10:41):
I'm like well, would you tellyour friend who failed a test
they're stupid?
She's like I would never dothat.
I'm like well, would you tellyour friend who failed a test
that they're stupid?
She's like no, I would never dothat.
I'm like.
Then, why are you so hard onyourself, like it's so hard?
Sometimes we're harder onourselves and we need to be kind
to ourselves as well.
Jerry Snavely (10:55):
Yeah, I mean, and it's good to have expectations
of ourselves and to have goalsand to want to do well, but at
the same time, sometimes wedon't do everything well,
sometimes we have bad days andand it's okay.
Um, and, like I say, just be alittle forgiving and and move on
and a tomorrow can be a betterday, and just to try to handle
(11:15):
situations better, or whateverit might be.
I like it.
Tim Maceyko (11:18):
Uh, number two is be thankful.
Gratitude.
Jerry Snavely (11:22):
Yeah, man, just an attitude of gratitude.
Um, I know we have a a thingthat we have said with all of
our children.
It's basically this anytimeanybody does anything for you,
say thank you.
Anytime anybody does anythingfor you, be thankful.
And the reason we just simplywant to do that is it then
(11:44):
becomes not what you do, itbecomes who you are.
Yeah, and I become a thankfulperson.
Thank you for having me heretoday, thank you for doing this,
thank you for opening up thedoor for me, thank you for doing
that and thank you for supper,thank you for doing the dishes,
thank you for and, if it may,just all of a sudden, it's like
I'll become a thankful personand if we can just learn to
(12:05):
maybe look at things throughthat lens, then maybe we can be
a little more of a betterattitude and being happy with
what's going on and having alittle gratitude in our lives.
Tim Maceyko (12:14):
I agree.
I agree, and sometimes too,again, when you're suffering out
there and you're feeling downand it's hard to be thankful,
but remember what you should bethankful for, for things you do
have.
We focus on the things thatwe've lost, things we don't have
, and it's a natural reaction,but, in order to keep the faith,
think about the things you dohave and be thankful for them,
(12:35):
whether it's your health or yourloved ones or whatever's left
in your life.
Jerry Snavely (12:40):
Classic, good old story that go along with that
is the guy who complained abouthaving or needing new shoes to
the gentleman who had no feet.
Yeah, yeah.
Tim Maceyko (12:50):
Yeah.
Jerry Snavely (12:51):
Yeah, you know, and you're sitting and think, oh
, wow, and sometimes we do, andI don't know some people listen
to us.
I mean you've experienced greatgrief but at the same time, you
typically don't have to looktoo far down the road to find
someone who has gone throughmore, and so, yeah, you just be
grateful for where you're at,absolutely.
Tim Maceyko (13:09):
Number one is to keep the faith is pray.
Speaker 4 (13:13):
Yeah.
Jerry Snavely (13:14):
Yeah, just um, just praying and just, uh,
talking to the Lord.
Um, he I mean, if I believescripture, he knows what's going
on anyway he knows.
He just simply desires to havea relationship with you.
He desires to have you conveyto him everything that's going
on with you.
One thing you have to realizeis he has very broad shoulders
(13:35):
and you're not going to offendhim If you're going through a
difficult time or through aseason that you simply don't
understand.
He can handle you saying, god,I am not happy with you right
now, and he would say I get it,you're going through a rough
time, I understand it.
Just give him everything.
Just give it to him, let himsort it out.
(13:57):
The biggest thing is just havingthat communication, talking to
him, but then being willing tolisten, being willing to have
patience, being willing tounderstand that he sees the big
picture.
You're only seeing a littleglimpse of it right now and
perhaps in time you'll look backat this season and you'll be
(14:20):
able to see the whys and thehows and the what bores.
That right now just isn'tmaking any sense to you.
Um, but just talk to him aboutit.
Talk to him about everything.
That's what he wants you to do.
Yeah, I love that.
Tim Maceyko (14:36):
I love that, and and you know, steve harvey, the
comedian, said he does this.
He said he you know he lives inthe morning, but he said very
first two things.
He does is he meditates, helistens and then he prays.
He talks, so he listens forthose messages and then he prays
on what he thinks he needs torespond with and ask for and
(14:58):
pray for the health of othersand those types of things.
So I think that's reallyprofound, the idea of listen and
talk to him both.
I think that's a great idea.
Okay, well, I'll tell you whatthat's a great list, a great way
to kick things off, a way tokeep the faith, five things you
can do.
So, if you're struggling, thinkabout it, and hopefully you'll
feel a little bit better.
(15:18):
We're going to take our breakwhen we come back, though.
I'm going to let Jerry talkabout his story and the story of
adoption and how it kind of wasa rollercoaster ride for you,
and you really questioned somethings, but it all turned out
wonderful, didn't it?
Amen, yes, sir, we'll do thatright after the song of the week
.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
This is Tim Maseko with Jerry Snavely and you're
listening to Faith Beyond outtoday.
Cause the good things coming myway Pay my dues.
I deserve a break.
Gonna, look up to heaven.
(15:58):
Yeah, I'm expecting blessingshere today.
I'm saying yes to better days.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, I'm saying yes To betterdays.
Yes, I'm on my way.
(16:19):
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, climbed a mountain justto see the top.
Looking down now see how farI've come.
Gonna, take a deep breath.
Enjoy while I can.
The best is yet to come Causethe good things coming my way
Pay my dues.
I deserve a break.
(16:39):
Gonna, look up to heaven.
Yeah, I'm expecting blessingshere today.
I'm saying yes to better days.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, I'm saying yes to betterdays.
Yes, I'm on my way.
(17:01):
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, all that's left is tohave a little fun.
Never be too serious and numb,cause life is too short to stay
up on the shore.
Gonna, dive into the sun, causethe good things come in my way.
(17:30):
Bye.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Yeah, I'm saying yes to betterdays.
Yes, I'm on my way.
Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Tim Maceyko (17:47):
Yeah, all right, we are back and again I got jerry
snavely with me.
He's an ordained minister andwhat's?
(18:08):
What's school did you go to forthat like?
cincinnati bible college, whichis no longer even in existence,
sadly, wow yeah, schools comeand go, though right yeah,
unfortunately it it does um, andalso you know we're talking
earlier, we're talking aboutmoving in our list of five
things.
You mentioned the fact you'rean official and, yeah, you were
recognized this year in ohio aswhat the girls basketball
(18:28):
official of the year for thewhole state.
Is that right?
That?
Jerry Snavely (18:32):
is.
It was a very humbling, uh,very surprising and uh it was.
It was a very unique honor anduh and appreciate it, but also
very humbled by it, because Iknow there are a lot of great
officials in the state of ohio,so to be recognized that way was
.
I actually laughed when I firstsaw the letter.
It's like you gotta be kiddingme.
Tim Maceyko (18:53):
No, I think it's great, I mean you know,
obviously I coached, yeah, andso this is one of the ways I
know jerry is from.
Uh, you officiated many of myhigh school girls basketball
games when I was coaching and,and, uh, I always, always
objectively, thought it's notjust because you're sitting in
the studio, but I always saidthat you were one of the best,
like consistent, and you wouldexplain things and you, you know
(19:14):
, whether I agree with the callor not made no difference.
You're very on point with itand you just really embrace
people in a manner that makes iteasy to talk to, and I think
that goes a long way yeah, yep.
Jerry Snavely (19:25):
I mean, hey, we, we get most of them right, some
of them we don't.
And if I didn't felt like I gotit right, I'm going to tell you
that, and if you didn't feltlike I got it right, I'm just
going to simply say well, thisis what I saw yeah, well, and
from a coaching perspective, Ialways had the right answer, the
official, you know, sometimesthey.
Intro (19:43):
They got it wrong.
Tim Maceyko (19:44):
I always had it right yeah that's how it works
exactly exactly you need that.
W yeah, yeah, I always saidofficiating is the toughest job
because you make half the gymmad, no matter what your call is
Exactly.
Jerry Snavely (19:56):
Exactly Yep, for sure.
Tim Maceyko (19:59):
All right.
Well, let's get into your storynow.
I think this is an importantthing to share, and I noticed my
dogs are coming and going outof their rooms.
So if people hear a littleclacking here and there, I
apologize.
But you know the wife is goneand the dogs are active, so I
keep hearing them in myheadphones.
So I I apologize if you hearthat, but it is what it is.
Um, that's the joy ofpodcasting from your home studio
(20:20):
.
There you go, there you go, butlet's go ahead and talk about
it.
So you weren't looking to adoptyeah or anything like that,
right once this all came aboutyeah, not at all.
Jerry Snavely (20:28):
Um, just to give you some, where I'm at, I'm 56
years old now, so when thisstory started back in 2019, you
can do the math at the age I was.
And so just to try to get youto what's going on, we have
another family in the churchthat does foster care and they
would take in a lot of timesteenagers, and at that time I
(20:50):
was the youth pastor.
So they would bring in youngpeople into their home and as
youth pastor, I would meet themat church and just introduce
myself and invite them to youthgroup and things of that nature.
With this one particular Sundayin February of 19, they bring
in this young lady into theirhome and and I see her at church
and I go up and introducemyself to her and little did I
know.
(21:10):
She came in tow at that timewith a two-month-old little guy
and she was 15 at the time.
And so I just do like I didwith all the kids and just
struck up a conversation, got toknow her a little bit and
invited her to youth group, andshe says, well, what do I do
with him?
I says, was he yours?
She said, yeah, well, then youbring him.
(21:30):
And so she did.
She came that night and shebrought this little guy to youth
group with us and, and so wejust started this relationship
with her and and, just like wewould any other young person
that comes to church, you justtry to love on and meet them
where they're at and do whateveryou can.
So it's not very long into therelationship with her and having
them at youth group, we kind ofrealized she's in over her head
(21:51):
, as you could imagine, being a15-year-old single mom.
So we just build thisrelationship with her.
My wife gets a phone call acouple months later from the
foster mom and she says thisyoung lady is going to ask you
and Jerry to take her baby.
And Debra's like what?
(22:13):
And so this is what she's goingto do.
And so I'm at work and so Debracalls me and informs me of this
and I'm like, wait, what didyou say?
She's going to ask us to takeher baby.
She wants us to become thelegal guardians of this little
boy.
And obviously it's like youknow sometimes you say, hey, can
you handle the curveball?
(22:33):
We didn't even know we wereplaying the game.
That's how far out of leftfield this came.
So I hang up with my wife, andso I just start praying.
I just you know, man, lord,this is wow.
And so I just start praying andjust asking and and and, and.
There was a few different timesin this story where I would tell
you that I I heard the voice ofthe lord and never really been
(22:55):
an audible thing for me, it'sjust more of a impressed upon my
spirit.
But as I'm praying, he simplygives me three words, and the
three words were simply selfish,selfless, choose.
And so I start contemplatingthose words.
Lord, what do you mean?
(23:16):
We have three grown children,and the youngest at that time
was just getting ready tograduate college.
We were literally like monthsaway of being empty nesters and
we had saved money to do alittle traveling and whatever.
And to me it was just simplylike the lord was saying hey,
you had your plans, if you wantto do that, just go and do it.
But it's kind of being selfish,or you can simply be selfish.
(23:38):
So I just prayed about it and Isimply decided that, yeah, we
could go see stuff or we couldmake a difference in someone's
life, and so that's what wedecided to do.
And so she, uh, gave us thislittle guy and, uh, we had him
for 10 days in our home whenhe's four months old.
Well then, the day before we goto court to um, have this
(24:00):
become legal guardians?
She changes her mind and, uh,she says I want him back.
And so she comes and get himand, uh, and that was fine, I.
But I just simply asked her youknow what's changed?
You gave him to us because youknew you couldn't care for him.
What's changed in 10 days?
And she just simply said I justwant to be his mom.
(24:20):
Okay, that's fine.
So we gave him back and shewent, and so we just continued
to build this relationship andlove on him the best we could,
and we did that.
Unfortunately for the young lady, come November of 2019, she'd
made some poor choices inbetween there as well, but then
the biggest poor decision shemade came in November of 2019.
(24:44):
And she actually left with Kaiof the foster home and went away
on a Saturday, and then so thefoster parents came to church on
Sunday morning and theyinformed us.
She ran away, she took him andthey're gone.
And so, obviously, you're just,you're you just?
You're just running the gammaof fear, hope, um man, just pray
(25:10):
and they're okay.
So we go over to the home, uh,after church and we just spend
the afternoon there.
I have to run and do someerrands to get things ready for
youth group that night and asI'm coming back from kroger, I'm
pulling into the road that theylive on and I see this young
lady and the baby and she'swalking down the road to get
(25:31):
back home, and so I I just driveup and I get him and put him in
the car, and it's November andthe little guy, he doesn't even
have a coat on, and I justremember that they just got in
the front seat with me.
But it was so incredible, hiseyes and my eyes met and it was
(25:53):
literally like I could look intohis soul and and we just
connected.
So we, we take him back home orback to the foster home, and
and we realize at that pointthat you know she's going to
lose him, you know they're goingto, they're going to take him.
So I just told my wife, hey,get out in front of this, we
don't want him going into fostercare, we'll take him in a
kinship relationship, and and sothat's what we do, we take him
(26:15):
into our home, and then shedecides to let us adopt him and
really I know we don't have awhole lot of time here, but
we're willing to do anything tohelp her.
We have been willing to adopther and we start that process
because we want them to staytogether, we want them to be a
family.
(26:38):
But as we start that process ofadopting her just to keep it
short, basically just we justweren't going to offer to her
the lifestyle she wanted to live, and it's like she wanted it
for kai, but she didn't want itfor herself and she just wasn't
willing to do that.
So she went the direction shewanted to go and and chose to go
, and so we ended up with Kaiand she wanted us to adopt him
(26:59):
all along.
So we proceeded with that andwe were once again two weeks
away to go to court for anuncontested adoption.
And she changes her mind andshe comes back in and says no, I
want to, I want to, so we haveto.
And you might say at this pointwell, that's why would you not
(27:22):
want her to have her son?
And it wasn't that we didn't,and we were willing to work with
her once again.
I mean, if you can, if you canchange and you can do things and
and, but she just it was justtoxic.
And I guess sometimes, aslistening to this story, you
just have to believe that weknow things about her that you
(27:42):
don't know as listeners rightnow, and you just have to trust
us that we felt we were fightingfor his, literally fighting for
his life, to keep him safe yeah, let me interject here, jerry,
just because I I know that, um,you know that did uh, I don't
want to say this.
Tim Maceyko (28:01):
I worked at children's services for a little
while, for about a year, and itwas a temporary layover between
that and my next position inlife, but I worked with a lot of
foster kids and foster youthand that was kind of one of my
roles and so I definitely, youknow, saw what you're talking
about and so if you're listening, it's easy, when you don't see
(28:23):
those things, to think, well,yeah, you want to back with the
parent and in theory you do,because that's a hard thing for
a child to not be with theparent.
But when you see a parent who'sstruggling, who maybe has an
addiction or whatever the casemay be, sometimes it's just you
have to do what you got to do,and it's never a good thing,
(28:48):
it's never an easy thing, butyou have to think about what's
best for the child at that point.
And, and boy, I've seen somereally heartbreaking cases and
it sounds like this is kind ofone of those where I think the
mom wanted him, but yet shewanted what was better for him,
but yet she didn't want to givehim up, you know, and she knew,
knew.
I'm sure she knew that she wasin a position that she couldn't
(29:08):
do it, yet it was just the ideaof making it a permanent move
every time probably just got toher yeah I think that's really
what it was.
Jerry Snavely (29:16):
I think that's a great way to to state it was.
Did she love him?
Yes, could she give him whatshe needed to give him?
She knew she couldn't right,but at the at, so that she was,
there was literally thiswrestling match going on inside
(29:36):
of her absolutely and uh, and wegot that and we understood it,
but we still, we just feared forhim absolutely and uh, and that
was where we were at, and sowhat ended up happening is then
we ended up having to go througha contested adoption.
And you might be saying, some ofyou are about to say, isn't
(29:56):
there a dad involved in this?
Well, of course there is.
And, once again, this is justthe sadness of the story.
If you remember the young lady,she was 15 when we met her, so
she was pregnant at 14.
And the guy who was with herwas 26 at the time when that
happened, and so he's actuallyin prison.
(30:17):
It was literally just anabsolute roller coaster ride of
emotion.
Ride of emotion because whenshe came back to to contest,
well then, as they should, theytried to give her every right to
earn him back, and so we justhad to prepare ourselves, you
(30:38):
know, for that.
But she, just she couldn't, she, she came back for the first
court hearing and never showedup again and just never came
back any time.
And so there was just thislitany of things that had to
happen, and we talked aboutpraying earlier and we prayed so
(31:01):
hard for this little guy, youknow, and it was, it was just
praying for his protection.
We did Jericho walks around thecourthouse, and you may or may
not be familiar with that, butit's just simply a story from
the Bible where, basically, godwins the battle just by the
Israelites walking around thecity of Jericho and he knocks
(31:23):
the walls down.
And so we just prayed, lord,this is your victory to win,
this is your battle to win, andand it's just to protect kai and
um, and he did it was.
There was just so manymiraculous things, even on the
jericho walk.
Um, we did it.
(31:44):
So we walked around the thecourthouse seven different
sundays uh, six of them.
We walked one time and then theseventh.
So we walked around thecourthouse seven different
Sundays, six of them.
We walked one time and then theseventh one.
We walked seven laps around,just like they did in the Bible
story.
And the seventh time around, orthe seventh Sunday, there was
about 100 people showed up fromour church to walk with us.
And as we're walking around theseventh lap, we're going to
(32:07):
sing a couple praise songs atthe end of this Jericho walk,
but right in front of thecourthouse, as we're getting
ready to go up to sing, I heardthe Lord speak to me again and
he said don't pray to me to winit.
Praise me because I've won it,and one of our elders was
(32:28):
literally just a few stepsbehind me and not at the same
time but at the same place, infront of the courthouse.
He said he got a word from theLord and it simply was I hear
you, I hear you, I hear yourprayers, you've won.
And it's just like like therewere still hurdles, there were
(32:52):
still bumps in the road.
By the time we were done, Iweigh 185 pounds today.
By the time we were done, Iweighed 169 pounds.
At the actual adoption, Iweighed 169 pounds.
At the actual adoption, Iweighed 169 pounds.
Just, you literally anguishedfor him.
(33:16):
We fought for him like we wereliterally saving his life.
Yeah, because we felt we were.
Yeah, and we did.
It was just overwhelming tofeel God's presence.
But I guess what I would like tosay to your listeners is this
(33:37):
it wasn't all mountaintops.
There were so many valleys andit was just the ups and downs
and just God's faithfulnessthrough it.
And that's the part I thinksometimes we lose is we think
well, maybe because I'm afollower of Christ, it's just
all mountaintops and it's allrose petals.
No, it's not, because what Itell people today and I believe
(34:02):
it with all my heart.
God knew I needed to fight forhim heart.
God knew I needed to fight forhim to learn to love him the way
I needed to love him.
Had I not had to fight for him,I don't know that I would have
loved him to the inch degreethat I do today Because of the
fight.
(34:22):
So many mornings I would wakeup and I would pray and I would
just cry, I'd just sob for him.
Lord, protect him.
I can honestly tell you todaythat Kai Wade Snavely is my son.
I love him as much as all mynatural-born girls.
(34:47):
Nothing will ever change that.
He's a little biracial guy.
He's my son In every insta-gree, even though everyone that
looks at us says there ain't noway.
Tim Maceyko (35:05):
I say Yahweh.
Jerry Snavely (35:06):
And if you know anything about scripture, our
Lord is known as Yahweh, yeah,yeah, I'll say Yahweh.
And if you know anything aboutscripture, our Lord is known as
Yahweh yeah, the provider.
So is he, my son, yahweh?
And God made a way and that'sexactly what he did, and he just
saw to protect him, and sothat's where we're at in our
story.
Tim Maceyko (35:24):
I've seen your Facebook posts and he just got
out of basketball season.
It looked like he was having ablast.
Yep, looks like he's healthyand happy and really thriving.
Yeah, so that's that's.
That's a tremendous testamentto having faith and and and
thanks for sharing that.
I think that's going tohopefully help some people by
(35:45):
hearing that story and realizingthat you know the highs and
lows.
They come and go and it flowslike that.
You know, we are actuallytechnically out of time, but I'm
going to take just one moreminute because I want to ask you
one question from a you know,from a Christian standpoint.
Yeah, people out therelistening may say you know, well
(36:08):
, I lost someone I loved or Igot this cancer diagnosis
terminal.
You know, whatever the case maybe and the easy thing to say,
the most common thing to say isI was a Christian.
I went to you know church everySunday and, my God, where are
you now, when I needed you themost?
You've abandoned me and nowhere, you've left me distraught
(36:33):
and tore apart, and I'm on thefloor.
What do you say to those peopleLike how, how, what, what do we
tell them?
Jerry Snavely (36:40):
Yeah, I mean, the biggest thing we have to
remember as humans is this bodyis a tent.
It is temporary.
As nice as this earth is and asbeautiful as it is, this is a
temporary home inside of eachand every one of us, somewhere.
I don't know how it works, Ican't explain it, I don't know
(37:00):
where it's at, but there is asoul that lives inside of every
person that God designed to livefor an eternity, not in this
place, but in a future home thatwill be a forever home.
Biggest thing we have tounderstand, guys none of us are
(37:20):
getting out of this world alive.
Unless the Lord chooses toreturn before we go, then there
will be a generation that theywon't taste.
That you know, because the Lordsays I'm coming back.
But what happens that we haveto understand is is this?
You were not created for thisworld?
We're, we're, we're aliens, andscripture tells us that we
(37:44):
should, we could be, we shouldbe like an alien in this world.
We are just simply passingthrough to our home.
So the biggest thing I can tellyou is prepare for that home,
be ready, and and that's thegoal of of us as a believer and
(38:04):
us as a church is to make youacutely aware that you are made
for an eternity and the only waythat scripture tells us that we
have an eternity forever inheaven is to put our faith in
jesus christ and and and accepthis grace through the, the blood
sacrifice on the cross and Iknow I'm getting pretty deep
(38:25):
here on you and and maybe, andit's like whoa, where's this guy
going with all this?
Reach out to tim.
I'll be happy to talk with youpersonally if you want to know
more.
Um, but how do we navigate thedifficult times?
Is just by simply realizingthis.
This is not my home.
Yeah, I was made.
(38:46):
I'm made for something bigger.
I'm made for something better,I'm made for something forever.
And, uh, doesn't make it easier, it's still.
It's still painful, I get it,but the comfort hopefully we can
have is just simply knowingthat jesus is there to help us
navigate that through hisleading of the holy spirit.
(39:07):
But I guess you know I gave youa long answer to simply this
this is not your home, brotheror sister, whoever is listening,
and just be ready for thefuture and just get there and
navigate this and navigate thehard times, but have your hope
in Jesus Christ, because that'sthe only way, at the end of the
(39:28):
day, that's going to be whereeverything's going to stand, is
in your faith in Jesus Christ.
Tim Maceyko (39:34):
Well said, jerry.
I appreciate the honest answerand everybody listen.
I hope you got a lot out oftoday's episode.
I know I've I've jot a fewthings out mentally that I'm
going to think about, and eventhe beginning of the show, the
five things we talked about tohelp you keep your faith, were
important, jerry.
Your journey with the adoptionwas amazing, and Jericho walks
(39:56):
and and and the the voice of Godspeaking to you in the way he
did, and so just veryinspirational, I think, for
hopefully a lot of people thatare listening, and so thanks for
being here, thanks for sharingpeople that are listening.
So thanks for being here,thanks for sharing.
Hey, thanks for having me.
And that'll do it for this week, and this is Tim Maseko, jerry
Snavely, and I will leave youwith this message you can
overcome any adversity in life.
(40:17):
Together, we can overcome, wecan achieve, we can go on and do
great things with the time wehave on this earth.
So go do it.
It's your time, it's my time.
Speaker 4 (40:39):
It's our time.
We don't stop here.
We keep on dreaming.
Set the goals and we willachieve them.
It's our time, it's our time.
It will make it count.
Oh, watch us close, cause wewill grow and become unstoppable
(41:02):
, become unstoppable.
Oh, we take our dreams and makethem real, cause nothing is
impossible.
It's our time, it's our timeand we'll make it count.
It's our lives, it's our livesand we'll live it loud.
We don't stop and we keep ondreaming.
(41:27):
Set the goals and we willachieve them.
It's a time, it's a time, andwe'll make it count.
It's a time, it's a time, andwe'll make it count.
Intro (41:39):
You've been listening to the Faith Beyond Podcast.
To subscribe to future episodesor to follow Tim's blog, go to
faithbeyondorg.
And you can find Faith Beyondwith Tim Maseko on Facebook,
instagram and Twitter.
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