October 25, 2025 • 32 mins
In this compelling episode of the Falling for Learning Podcast, our insightful host T.D. Flenaugh engages in a transformative conversation with Latoya Nichole Stewart, a conscious parent coach and author of Putting Down the Belt. Together, they delve into the profound shift from corporal punishment to thoughtful parenting centered on love and consequences.
Latoya Nichole shares her journey of moving away from the discipline methods she experienced as a child and transitioning into a more conscious, loving approach. She introduces her book, Putting Down the Belt, and the BELT formula: Breaking biases, Evaluating the situation, Loving through the process, and Thoughtful parenting. This formula offers parents practical strategies for understanding and guiding their children without resorting to physical punishment.
During the interview, Latoya Nichole emphasizes the importance of recognizing age-appropriate behaviors and the need for parents to be more mindful and reflective. She discusses how parents can evaluate situations, understand the underlying issues affecting their children, and implement thoughtful, loving solutions. She also highlights the critical role of positive reinforcement and emotional intelligence in fostering healthier relationships and promoting self-sufficiency in children.
Listeners will gain valuable insights into the challenges and rewards of conscious parenting and learn actionable steps to create a nurturing, supportive environment for their children. This episode is a must-listen for parents, educators, and caregivers seeking to break generational cycles of punitive discipline and build a legacy of love and understanding.
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Conscious Parenting, Thoughtful Parenting, Corporal Punishment Alternatives, Parenting Strategies, Positive Reinforcement, Emotional Intelligence, Generational Health, Child Development,
#ConsciousParenting #ThoughtfulParenting #ParentingTips #PositiveReinforcement #EmotionalIntelligence #ChildDevelopment #BreakingCycles #ParentingAdvice #FallingForLearning #EndCorporalPunishment #ParentingWisdom #NoMoreBelt
Tune in to discover how you can transition from corporal punishment to thoughtful parenting and build a healthier, more loving relationship with your children. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and share this episode with other parents and caregivers looking for positive change.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
TD Flenaugh (00:09):
If you're beating your kids, giving whoopings,
some type of corporalpunishment, you could be ruining
them. Our guest today, LatoyaNicole, is the author of a book
called putting down the belt,the conscious parenting guide.
She is a mother andentrepreneur, and she's going to
(00:31):
tell you about her experience inputting down the belt, changing
how she was taught as a childand how she started her
parenting journey. And so staytuned so that you can get the
information that you need tomake sure your kids are on track
for learning and stay on trackfor success and keep that
(00:54):
relationship in place too. Allright. Hit like, subscribe.
Let's get into it. Hi. Thank youso much for joining the
following for learning podcast.
We have this podcast to helpparents and caregivers with
having the resources, strategiesand tools needed to make sure
that their children are on trackfor learning and to stay on
track for success. We are soglad that you've joined us
(01:16):
today. We have, you know, kindof leveled up our production
quality. We're using our Ecamm,and we are really excited to
have you our last episode thatwas a solo Episode Two in season
two had some technical issues,so we're back to looking grainy,
but we've been getting ittogether. So thank you for
(01:37):
joining us here. We're all aboutelevation, getting better every
time. And our guest, LatoyaNicole, is going to really get
into some ways that we couldchange some of that generational
kind of practices, bad habitsthat we've had before. Thank
you, Latoya Nicole, thanks somuch for joining us. How are you
(01:59):
doing today?
Latoya Nichole (02:02):
I'm good. I'm good.
TD Flenaugh (02:03):
Hello, hello. Okay, so can you tell us about and we
always ask our guests this, whathooked you into learning, what
made you love learning as a kid?
Latoya Nichole (02:17):
Um, the fact that I could have information at
my fingertips. Um, honestly,anytime I was bored or needed
something to do, it was like, golook something up in the
dictionary, go read a book,things like that. So I was
always learning. I think I justloved learning. Okay,
TD Flenaugh (02:41):
all right. So that didn't annoy you when they were
asking you to do that kind ofstuff.
Latoya Nichole (02:47):
Maybe you want to know more?
TD Flenaugh (02:49):
Excellent. Yes, it's all about and how parents
do it, right, good. All right.
And can you tell us aboutyourself as you know, a learner
over the years. Like youreducational journey, your
career, we know that you're anentrepreneur,
Latoya Nichole (03:07):
and yes, so educational journey. I grew up,
actually as a military brat. Iwas raised by immigrants. Okay,
my mom was born in K and mygrandparents, they are actually
from Jamaica, and both of themhave the reading level. Came to
this country with the readinglevel of third grader, but here
(03:31):
we are. I am a product ofgenerational wealth. However,
that looks for for for someimmigrants, let's see military.
Brad, I graduated from highschool in New Jersey and joined
the military shortly afterwards,because I wanted to keep my
benefit. And from there, I tookcollege courses and things like
(03:55):
that. But I've never stoppedlearning. I've never stopped
taking in information,especially when it comes to
kids, because I'm always aroundkids. I've always worked with
kids, and of course, I have kidsof my own. Yeah,
TD Flenaugh (04:09):
so you're a product of generational wealth. I want
to go back to that. Tell us alittle bit about that.
Latoya Nichole (04:17):
So, um, I say this because when my grandfather
first came to this country, hewas picking oranges. When he
died, he was a homeowner andthings like that. So he he left
the legacy my grandmother stilllives in this in that house to
(04:39):
this day. Um, there. They hadtwo children, my mother and her
sister. My mom's sister passed,but she left the daughter
behind. Yeah, that daughter iscurrently working on her PhD at
John Hopkins,
TD Flenaugh (04:54):
wonderful. Okay, so this is what our show is about,
legacy building. So. Yeah, weknow that. You know, you came
from a history where your familyis, you know, has more giving
you more than they were given.
And I'm sure you're passing thaton to your children, which
brings us to, you know, puttingdown the belt. How is that
(05:15):
related to legacy building, or,you know, generational health
and wealth, right?
Latoya Nichole (05:24):
So, yes, because we do want to pass down
generational health as well, asyou know, because of the color
of our skin, we are affected byslavery. And I think it doesn't
matter what color your skin is,I think we're all affected by
it, period, especially you beatyour kids. It's it was known a
practice of using belts orwhippings to get people in line
(05:50):
to get the desired behavior. Butit never worked then, and it
still doesn't work now.
TD Flenaugh (05:56):
Okay, alright, so when you were growing up, and
you even told me that youstarted with doing this with
your kids, right?
Latoya Nichole (06:04):
Yeah, I used to.
I used to beat my kids. I'm notgonna lie. I used to beat them,
but I learned that there's adifferent way to get the desired
outcome, and that's throughconscious parenting. It's all
the knowledge has always beenthere for me too, because of all
the psychology courses anddevelopmental psychology courses
(06:27):
that I've taken. So it's like,oh, okay, they are doing age
appropriate activities. How doI, as the parents, still give
them discipline and boundariesthat go alongside of what the
desired behavior is or what thepunishment if there's punishment
(06:50):
that needs to be enacted. So,
TD Flenaugh (06:54):
so hold on. So you're saying, I noticed you
didn't say like if they'reacting up, you're saying they're
doing age appropriateactivities, right? So what might
some of those age appropriateactivities that maybe, if I'm
still, you know, I'm still doingwhat my parents did. I'm
(07:14):
whipping my kids, I'm gettingthat bailed out. What are some
of those age appropriateactivities we might label as
acting up, or, you know, cuttingup, or whatever we want to call
it.
Latoya Nichole (07:26):
So it's a lot of different things. Most of it is
like people always love to saythe kids not listening. You have
to say things more than onetime, but
TD Flenaugh (07:35):
right
Latoya Nichole (07:37):
after the first time of saying that there should
be a consequence after the firsttime, and it's because we're
drawing it out. We're saying thesame thing over and over and
over. The kids are like, Hey, Igot a couple of times before mom
gets up on our feet, Go. Keepgoing. Especially with the
younger ones, another one, ateam might look like they're
(07:59):
acting out, because you feel asthough they might be talking
back to you, when in actuality,they could just be emotional or
having an outburst because ofsomething that's going on in
their life, and because you'reso quick to rule it as them
being disobedient, You're notgetting to the root of the
(08:21):
problem.
TD Flenaugh (08:24):
This is interesting because, yes, we talk about the
hormones, the mix of hormonesand emotions that teenagers go
through, and it is a trying timefor the kids and of definitely
for the parents. So how are youdealing with that. I'm noticing
you say the first time there isa consequence. So what kind of
(08:46):
consequence would that looklike? Because we're talking
about putting down the belt. Sowhat are we doing instead?
Latoya Nichole (08:52):
So, um, this actually gives me a great
opportunity to kind of plug mybook. Let's plug it. Let's do
it. So I have a book calledputting down the belt. It is on
sale on Amazon. I
TD Flenaugh (09:06):
I got my copy. Go get yours.
Latoya Nichole (09:10):
In the book, there's a worksheet that you can
actually use in real time forany issues that you're having.
So in the book, I use anacronym, which is belt, which is
my formula to help you put downthe belt. The B stands for
breaking biases. E is forevaluating the situation. L is
(09:33):
for love, and T is forthoughtful parenting. And we use
this to actually say, okay, mychild is having an issue. How do
I break the biases surroundingthis issue? So say I have a
teenager who has emotionaloutbursts, right? I'm going to
(09:59):
look at it. Right? My bias mightbe, I got a disrespectful child,
right? I would never talk to myparents that way. My parents
would would knock me into nextweek if I talk to them like
that. That's the bias, right? Itis. So when we go down to E
(10:19):
evaluating the situation, wemight find out that our child
might be getting bullied atschool. We might find out that
maybe because who I'm dating, ormaybe because I recently am
going through a divorce orsomething, or we just broke up,
(10:42):
or me and the other parent arenot getting along, and it is
affecting my child. Okay,
TD Flenaugh (10:47):
so we're really thinking about evaluating and
maybe even not blaming my child,but looking to see what my role
might be in it.
Latoya Nichole (10:56):
Yes, because in conscious parenting, the problem
is never the child. The problemis the problem. And a lot of
people treat the problem as ifit's the child.
TD Flenaugh (11:04):
The problem is never the child, the problem is
the problem. Okay, get thisbook. Okay, I gotta start
looking at myself. I might bedoing something wrong,
Latoya Nichole (11:17):
or might even find out that, yeah, we might
even find out that our child isjust acting out because they
they miss having time with us.
Maybe you're spending more timewith the other kids and you're
not giving them enough time,right? That's evaluating the
situation. Once you're able toevaluate it, like, okay, I can
see what's going on. So when youget to the L portion, which is
(11:38):
love, you're like, how do I loveon my child through this
situation? How do I love on mychild through this situation?
Maybe I need to plan more one onone time with my child. Maybe I
need to get my child intocounseling. You know, maybe I
need to go up to the school, setan appointment with the guidance
(11:59):
counselor see what's going on atschool. You know, you never know
these kids. They have so muchgoing on. And sometimes we're so
caught up in our own life thatwe neglect to understand that
they have lives too. Mm, andthat's heavy the thoughtful
parenting. That's that consciousparenting. I think mindfulness.
(12:23):
How do you how do you approachthem in that way? So on the
worksheet, you actually have alittle section where you put in
your action plan. So you mightsay, Okay, now my action plan
is, I'm going to plan one on onedates with my child. Once a
week, I'm going to go up to theschool and make sure that
(12:43):
nothing's wrong with my childschool wise, you know, okay,
talk to my child and say, maybe,you know, give them a audit. I
love telling people to audit,audit, audit yourself. Audit
yourself. Towards your kids, askthem, What am I doing? I like to
go with the negative first.
Okay, do to be a better parentto you, because they, if you, if
(13:07):
you give them the space and theyfeel comfortable enough, they
will hurt your feelings. So letme,
TD Flenaugh (13:11):
let me just pause for a second, because you do
have to really be in a differentspace, right? Because if you're
in this space where I'm justbusy. I'm too busy to deal with
this, I'm too busy to deal withthat, then this isn't gonna
work. So I really have to bereflective about myself. So I
have to do some work. Like thisis my dress. You know, it's easy
(13:34):
to pick up that belt, right?
Isn't that easy?
Latoya Nichole (13:37):
Look? Um, you
TD Flenaugh (13:38):
want me to take on some blame and everything I
gotta take on somebody. Man,
Latoya Nichole (13:46):
yes, you do. You do. But the good thing is, is,
after you ask them that, askthem, because after you feeling
hurt, you gonna need to hearsome good. What am I doing?
Good? What do I need to keepdoing okay. What do you love
about me being being your mom?
Okay, that way you feel goodabout yourself. Okay. Look, it's
(14:06):
not all bad. Work over here. Butguess what? They still left me.
They still okay.
TD Flenaugh (14:12):
Can you take us back to like, what caused this
switch for you? Because, as youstated earlier, you already were
into it, right? You got weaponsat a child, your kids getting
weapons, and then somehow youdecided to change this. So what
changed you? What was the thing?
Latoya Nichole (14:31):
It is, the realization of turning into my
mother, as real as that sounds,
TD Flenaugh (14:40):
tell us more about that.
Latoya Nichole (14:42):
I don't want to be my mother. I don't want to be
running around the house withthe belt in one hand fussing and
cussing at everybody. You knowhow stressful that is. Your
blood pressure high? Mm, youstressed out. You got a
headache. Hair falling out, allthat stuff. All because you want
everybody to get in line. Andyou just the Wicked Witch of the
(15:05):
West with the belt. Everybodycan get it. But no, that's
that's happening there. When wethink about it, it's crazy. You
see them women that be in thestore busting and cussing at
their kids, threatening some ofthem even, even put their hands
on their kids in the store. Theydon't care. But when you're
(15:26):
around somebody like that thatis stressful to you. You're
like, oh my god, like you coulddo this in so many other ways.
There's a big line. There's abig line between the behavior
and get in the belt, you have awhole list of other things that
you can do before you get to thebell, and that's why I'm here.
(15:51):
It's like, okay, there's thingsthat you can do that you can
better understand your child.
You can correct the behavior andensure that they don't do it
again, and even if they do,guess what? How many times did
it take your hard headed behindto figure something out? You
know, we all, we look we allhard headed
TD Flenaugh (16:12):
fast. Yes, hold that thought, because we're
gonna be on a break and thenwe're gonna get back to it okay
for the United States, 75% ofchildren don't know how to
write. Well, add that to thefact that so many people out
there are trying to silence thevoices of those who have been
oppressed and trying to preventthem from telling their story.
(16:35):
Who's going to tell your storyif your child doesn't know how
to write? Well, I have two booksto address this issue, the
rewrite method and the rewritemethod workbook grid tend to
make sure that parents know whatto do, that educators know what
to do to get their children towrite better and just not write
better, but love to write. Makesure that your next generation
(16:58):
could tell their story and theywon't be silenced. Go to
fallingforlearning.com today topurchase your set. Okay, so we
are with Toya Nicole. We'regoing to continue to talk about
how she made the switch fromwhooping her kids, just like
she's been taught as a kid. Youknow, she got whoopings As a
(17:20):
child, many of us did, and shedid the same thing with her
kids, but she made this switch.
How is this different than isconscious parenting and like the
gentle parenting the same? Or isthere a different?
Latoya Nichole (17:33):
Oh, it is not the same. Actually, I get
offended by just a parentingbecause when you think of gentle
parenting, you think of Charlie,stop
TD Flenaugh (17:44):
that, stop that Johnny. Oh my gosh. Stop,
Johnny. Stop everybody.
Latoya Nichole (17:50):
Everybody thinks of this when they hear gentle
parenting, is that, that lazyparenting, that permissive
parenting, you going to say thesame thing, there's no
discipline, there's noboundaries, you know, but
conscious parenting is not thatit's about having the
boundaries. It's about havingemotional intelligence. It knows
(18:13):
that kids are going to test theboundaries. Here's how you put a
safety device in place, justlike when you go bowling. You
know, they put the bumpers up.
I'm just passing it, the bumper,okay, it's the bumpers for the
kids. It's like, Yo, I knowyou're going to be a kid and
you're going to do things thatkids do, but I'm your safety
net. I'm your safety net.
TD Flenaugh (18:35):
So that, I mean, that's so is it a good analogy?
Like to to understand? Can youtell us about, like, maybe some
missteps that happened along theway, or some real takeaways that
you had as you were doing this,as you've been making the
change?
Latoya Nichole (18:53):
So yes, I will always say that I am not a
perfect parent, and this is ajourney, but I've been in this
journey long enough to guideyou, and because I used to beat
my kids first, I'm better athelping you, because most
(19:14):
conscious parenting coaches havenot gone through this before,
and It's really just being ableto, in the moment, just stop and
not fuss and cuss and be like,Okay, what is going on in this
situation? How do I be smarterthan my kid? Because my kid
(19:34):
thinks they're smarter than me,not like, seriously, I'm not
kidding you. Nine times out of10 these kids think they're
smarter than us. Tell us more.
You have to be the one smarter.
And a lot of times it's justlike, Yo, I gotta understand
what my kid is thinking.
TD Flenaugh (19:50):
Wait a minute, what do you mean by they? They think
we're smarter. Tell us more.
Like, break that down. So
Latoya Nichole (19:55):
you ever, you ever, oh, what's going. It. You
know how you tell your kids, goclean go clean your room, right?
Clean your room. And, you know,if you will, you you walk away.
You tell them, Go clean theirroom. You walk away, right? You
go, do your own thing. Guesswhat they're doing, not cleaning
that room, right, right? Yeah,they're not cleaning that room.
(20:19):
And the first thing out yourmouth is like, Yo, you want to
be like, Did I tell you to cleanyour room? But guess what?
That's not going to get the roomclean right. And what stresses
you out? It stresses your kidout, right? Instead, you can
(20:40):
actually set timers. You cangive them a goal list, like,
hey, what do you want to dofirst? You want to clean this up
first. You want to not cleanthis up. Or do you want to clean
that up first? And guess what?
They're still going to even ifyou give them tasks before they
even get into it. Because my sonis so guilty of this. Okay,
Mike, look, go clean your room.
(21:09):
He gives this whole theatricalperformance he's going to get
out of cleaning his room. Itnever works unless I'm in the
mood where I'm like, You knowwhat? I don't care, and I let it
go, because sometimes it's notthat serious, and sometimes it's
like, Look, son, if you don'tclean your room, CPS going to
(21:29):
come get you, you're going to beliving in foster care, and
you're not even going to haveyour own room. You want to share
a bed with like 10 other people.
Look, you exaggerate it as muchas you want to. You can even
pull up Foster, foster parentingstories on the Internet. We're
they're there. Look, I'm notsaying scare your kids, but
sometimes you gotta let themknow, like you gotta, but still,
(21:51):
you can break it down intosmaller tasks, because it
honestly as soon as you walkaway, they're not going to do
anything because they'reoverwhelmed. But that goes back
to conscious parenting and beingmindful and evaluating the
situation. You know who yourkids are. You know how they act.
(22:11):
You know how they're going toreact certain things. How do you
stage it in a way that you don'tget a reaction out of them. Oh,
I know my kid likes to playvideo games, so guess what? This
is, what's going to be the goalat the at the end, like, look at
how clean your room is. Now youget to play video games to the
(22:32):
rest of night, and I don't haveto bother you because your room
is clean. Okay, that makessense. Yeah. So they really do
need it broken down into littletests for them.
TD Flenaugh (22:49):
So I like a lot about what you said, you know,
giving them a smaller task,making it digestible for them,
because kids do get overwhelmedby, you know, the room might be
very dirty, and so how do I getstarted? What do I do?
Latoya Nichole (23:07):
Like a tornado,
TD Flenaugh (23:10):
right? It's just easier to put it off. You know,
if you yell a little bit like Imight be used to you yelling, I
could just
Latoya Nichole (23:19):
ignore it, which is what they do, like,
seriously, yeah, for sure. Okay,so you said gentle parents, and
I told you, I was like, Oh, Idon't like that term, yeah,
there is no difference between,to me, there's no difference
between that gentle parent andthat parent that that's
constantly yelling at theirkids. Okay, before they get the
(23:41):
belt, you're both yelling,yelling, yelling, saying the
same thing over and over and notdoing anything about it. Mm, the
only difference is one parentgoes and gets the belt after
they get frustrated, the otherone doesn't do anything.
TD Flenaugh (23:55):
I see So what changes have you seen in your
kids since you did this becausewe did talk about that
generational health. So whatchanges have you seen in them?
So
Latoya Nichole (24:06):
I see them, they are happier. I don't get a lot
of pushback for a lot of things.
I see that my children are veryself sufficient. They will take
the initiative to do a lot ofthings on their own. I did have
make a video the other day, myson was cleaning out the toilet.
He was using my dish. It's inthe trash now. But how can I be
(24:29):
mad at a child that took theinitiative to clean whether they
did it right or wrong? I'm notgoing to be mad at him doing it
wrong. I'm just happy that hedid it, because that's positive
reinforcement. Kids literallyoperate off positive
(24:49):
reinforcement. If you want tosee positive behaviors,
reinforce it, praise them forit, even if it's like not
perfect. It. It don't gotta beperfect. Just let them know I
appreciate you. Thank you. Likebe oh yes, give them all the
praises like I I would havenever thought of that you are so
(25:14):
smart. Sometimes they think theylike I said, they think they
smarter than you. How to letthem think it sometimes,
sometimes you gotta let themthink it. We know the truth,
right? We have more lifeexperience, but sometimes they
want to have a say in how thingsgo in their own environment.
Their home is supposed to betheir safe space.
TD Flenaugh (25:37):
Yeah,
Latoya Nichole (25:38):
so if you're you're walking around like a
tyrant and treating everybody inthe household, um, like they're
your subjects. Then imagine howthat that works out for you.
TD Flenaugh (25:50):
Yeah. So tell me about your book, putting down
the belt. Like, how did it comeabout? You know, give me some
background on it.
Latoya Nichole (26:02):
So there is no book out there about how to put
down a belt. I realized thatlike that, which is crazy, but
the way that the book came aboutwas through the morning meetup.
Um, they says, you know, youneed a formula to be able to
help people something that youcan easily refer to. And it was
(26:24):
somebody else, nayetta from theactivity Playhouse. She's, yeah,
she's like, oh, you know when Ithink of you and I think of your
brand, I think about the belt.
Okay,
TD Flenaugh (26:36):
could you pause for a moment like, I don't know if
people know what the morningmeet up is, so just let them
know what it is.
Latoya Nichole (26:42):
So the morning Meetup is, oh, it's a group for
entrepreneurs who want to do butbigger and better things in
their business, right? Cometogether and meet every day,
Monday through Friday, to towhere we can gain insights and
have community when it comes toour business. I mean, that's how
we know each other. Yes,
TD Flenaugh (27:03):
we have Friday morning. Yes, alright, so you're
telling us, you know, one of thethings for your business is,
have that your consciousparenting brand, and you had, so
one of the members was talkingabout, you know, they think
about the belt and then take itfrom there, what would put
Latoya Nichole (27:25):
together for you somebody? And I was like, oh,
man, I can't, I can't think of,like, what would go with the
belt? Like, what would go withthe belt? So I had someone else
give me some words for theacronyms. And the longer I
looked at I was like, This isnot my brand. This is not my
brand at all. But I was able toreplace the words that you that
(27:49):
you now know, which is breakingbiases, evaluating the
situation, love and thoughtfulparenting, which represents my
brand, and this is somethingthat I could use to help people
put down the belt. Yes, so, and,of course, I applied a worksheet
in there, because sometimes it'snot enough to just have the
(28:10):
information. Sometimes you needto be able to write out your
problems, kind of likejournaling. Yes,
TD Flenaugh (28:18):
it's, it's wonderful. I mean, looking
through it, and really, youknow, I say people need to go
out and get it. It's soimportant. You know, part of
being an entrepreneur isleveling up yourself, and, you
know, it's also changingyourself and changing your
practices. And that doesn'thappen, you know, it happens
(28:40):
through reflection. It happensthrough all of that. And then
that's obviously what consciousparenting is thinking about. You
know what happened with us whenwe were kids, and how we could
improve upon that? Right? Wewant our children to do better
than what we had. We want themto be able to grow beyond what
we were able to grow, rightabout that legacy building, and
(29:04):
you don't have to pick oranges,you know, your grandparent did
that for you, and now you'regoing to give your child more
than what you had, you know. So,I mean, it's good. We need to
think about what we're doing.
Some of the things, like yousaid, we did, you know, rooted
in slavery. You know, we we'llbeat the kids and nobody else
will beat them, you know, kindof thing. Um, so
Latoya Nichole (29:29):
it's important eating kids never kept them out
of jail. Imma tell you that nowyou go to jail. Ask them who I
got a whooping. I guarantee you
TD Flenaugh (29:43):
very true, right?
We thought that, yeah, yeah. Soit's something we have to think
about. We just do things andjust to keep doing them, because
that's how it was when I had itis, we need to think beyond
that, right? And we're so gladthat you've joined us. And
you're spreading this messagewith people because, you know,
we don't know what we don'tknow, right? You just continue
(30:05):
to do the same practices. We'regoing to get the same results
right. We want to have we wantour kids to have more right. Our
program falling for learning isabout making sure that kids are
on track for learning and stayon track for success. And so
part of that, of course, isacademics, but also it has to be
about our relationships, abouttheir health and wellness as
(30:28):
well. So it's
Latoya Nichole (30:32):
the foundation of their life. Absolutely want
to build a strong foundation sothey can self sustain, because
eventually they're going toleave the nest.
TD Flenaugh (30:45):
Yes, yes. And what are some, you know, final
thoughts that you could give toour guests out there who are now
hearing your message and aregoing to consider what to do,
what? What are some finalthoughts.
Latoya Nichole (31:01):
So one of the biggest things I want to let
people know is that it's okay.
One, I don't judge people. Iunderstand, like, you know, I
tell people what I do. And somepeople are, like, taken aback by
it. But I do want you to know,like, if you beat your kids, and
(31:22):
I'm not going to judge you bywhat you have in your diaper
bag. These were the tools thatwere handed down to you. I am
here to help you put more toolsin your diaper bag. I'm giving
you more accessories that youcan use on your parenting
journey. Um, that's all I'm hereto do. I want to be the change
that I see in the world, and Istarted in my own home, in my
(31:44):
own mind. Thank you. Thank you.
TD Flenaugh (31:48):
Thanks again for supporting the falling for
learning podcast. New Episodesgo live every Saturday at 5pm
you can watch us on youtube.com,at falling for learning, or
listen on all major podcastplatforms such as Apple, Google,
(32:08):
Audible, Spotify and much morefor more resources, visit
falling in love withlearning.com. We really
appreciate you. Have a wonderfulweek.
If you're beating your kids, giving whoopings,
some type of corporalpunishment, you could be ruining
them. Our guest today, LatoyaNicole, is the author of a book
called putting down the belt,the conscious parenting guide.
She is a mother andentrepreneur, and she's going to
(00:31):
tell you about her experience inputting down the belt, changing
how she was taught as a childand how she started her
parenting journey. And so staytuned so that you can get the
information that you need tomake sure your kids are on track
for learning and stay on trackfor success and keep that
(00:54):
relationship in place too. Allright. Hit like, subscribe.
Let's get into it. Hi. Thank youso much for joining the
following for learning podcast.
We have this podcast to helpparents and caregivers with
having the resources, strategiesand tools needed to make sure
that their children are on trackfor learning and to stay on
track for success. We are soglad that you've joined us
(01:16):
today. We have, you know, kindof leveled up our production
quality. We're using our Ecamm,and we are really excited to
have you our last episode thatwas a solo Episode Two in season
two had some technical issues,so we're back to looking grainy,
but we've been getting ittogether. So thank you for
(01:37):
joining us here. We're all aboutelevation, getting better every
time. And our guest, LatoyaNicole, is going to really get
into some ways that we couldchange some of that generational
kind of practices, bad habitsthat we've had before. Thank
you, Latoya Nicole, thanks somuch for joining us. How are you
(01:59):
doing today?
Latoya Nichole (02:02):
I'm good. I'm good.
TD Flenaugh (02:03):
Hello, hello. Okay, so can you tell us about and we
always ask our guests this, whathooked you into learning, what
made you love learning as a kid?
Latoya Nichole (02:17):
Um, the fact that I could have information at
my fingertips. Um, honestly,anytime I was bored or needed
something to do, it was like, golook something up in the
dictionary, go read a book,things like that. So I was
always learning. I think I justloved learning. Okay,
TD Flenaugh (02:41):
all right. So that didn't annoy you when they were
asking you to do that kind ofstuff.
Latoya Nichole (02:47):
Maybe you want to know more?
TD Flenaugh (02:49):
Excellent. Yes, it's all about and how parents
do it, right, good. All right.
And can you tell us aboutyourself as you know, a learner
over the years. Like youreducational journey, your
career, we know that you're anentrepreneur,
Latoya Nichole (03:07):
and yes, so educational journey. I grew up,
actually as a military brat. Iwas raised by immigrants. Okay,
my mom was born in K and mygrandparents, they are actually
from Jamaica, and both of themhave the reading level. Came to
this country with the readinglevel of third grader, but here
(03:31):
we are. I am a product ofgenerational wealth. However,
that looks for for for someimmigrants, let's see military.
Brad, I graduated from highschool in New Jersey and joined
the military shortly afterwards,because I wanted to keep my
benefit. And from there, I tookcollege courses and things like
(03:55):
that. But I've never stoppedlearning. I've never stopped
taking in information,especially when it comes to
kids, because I'm always aroundkids. I've always worked with
kids, and of course, I have kidsof my own. Yeah,
TD Flenaugh (04:09):
so you're a product of generational wealth. I want
to go back to that. Tell us alittle bit about that.
Latoya Nichole (04:17):
So, um, I say this because when my grandfather
first came to this country, hewas picking oranges. When he
died, he was a homeowner andthings like that. So he he left
the legacy my grandmother stilllives in this in that house to
(04:39):
this day. Um, there. They hadtwo children, my mother and her
sister. My mom's sister passed,but she left the daughter
behind. Yeah, that daughter iscurrently working on her PhD at
John Hopkins,
TD Flenaugh (04:54):
wonderful. Okay, so this is what our show is about,
legacy building. So. Yeah, weknow that. You know, you came
from a history where your familyis, you know, has more giving
you more than they were given.
And I'm sure you're passing thaton to your children, which
brings us to, you know, puttingdown the belt. How is that
(05:15):
related to legacy building, or,you know, generational health
and wealth, right?
Latoya Nichole (05:24):
So, yes, because we do want to pass down
generational health as well, asyou know, because of the color
of our skin, we are affected byslavery. And I think it doesn't
matter what color your skin is,I think we're all affected by
it, period, especially you beatyour kids. It's it was known a
practice of using belts orwhippings to get people in line
(05:50):
to get the desired behavior. Butit never worked then, and it
still doesn't work now.
TD Flenaugh (05:56):
Okay, alright, so when you were growing up, and
you even told me that youstarted with doing this with
your kids, right?
Latoya Nichole (06:04):
Yeah, I used to.
I used to beat my kids. I'm notgonna lie. I used to beat them,
but I learned that there's adifferent way to get the desired
outcome, and that's throughconscious parenting. It's all
the knowledge has always beenthere for me too, because of all
the psychology courses anddevelopmental psychology courses
(06:27):
that I've taken. So it's like,oh, okay, they are doing age
appropriate activities. How doI, as the parents, still give
them discipline and boundariesthat go alongside of what the
desired behavior is or what thepunishment if there's punishment
(06:50):
that needs to be enacted. So,
TD Flenaugh (06:54):
so hold on. So you're saying, I noticed you
didn't say like if they'reacting up, you're saying they're
doing age appropriateactivities, right? So what might
some of those age appropriateactivities that maybe, if I'm
still, you know, I'm still doingwhat my parents did. I'm
(07:14):
whipping my kids, I'm gettingthat bailed out. What are some
of those age appropriateactivities we might label as
acting up, or, you know, cuttingup, or whatever we want to call
it.
Latoya Nichole (07:26):
So it's a lot of different things. Most of it is
like people always love to saythe kids not listening. You have
to say things more than onetime, but
TD Flenaugh (07:35):
right
Latoya Nichole (07:37):
after the first time of saying that there should
be a consequence after the firsttime, and it's because we're
drawing it out. We're saying thesame thing over and over and
over. The kids are like, Hey, Igot a couple of times before mom
gets up on our feet, Go. Keepgoing. Especially with the
younger ones, another one, ateam might look like they're
(07:59):
acting out, because you feel asthough they might be talking
back to you, when in actuality,they could just be emotional or
having an outburst because ofsomething that's going on in
their life, and because you'reso quick to rule it as them
being disobedient, You're notgetting to the root of the
(08:21):
problem.
TD Flenaugh (08:24):
This is interesting because, yes, we talk about the
hormones, the mix of hormonesand emotions that teenagers go
through, and it is a trying timefor the kids and of definitely
for the parents. So how are youdealing with that. I'm noticing
you say the first time there isa consequence. So what kind of
(08:46):
consequence would that looklike? Because we're talking
about putting down the belt. Sowhat are we doing instead?
Latoya Nichole (08:52):
So, um, this actually gives me a great
opportunity to kind of plug mybook. Let's plug it. Let's do
it. So I have a book calledputting down the belt. It is on
sale on Amazon. I
TD Flenaugh (09:06):
I got my copy. Go get yours.
Latoya Nichole (09:10):
In the book, there's a worksheet that you can
actually use in real time forany issues that you're having.
So in the book, I use anacronym, which is belt, which is
my formula to help you put downthe belt. The B stands for
breaking biases. E is forevaluating the situation. L is
(09:33):
for love, and T is forthoughtful parenting. And we use
this to actually say, okay, mychild is having an issue. How do
I break the biases surroundingthis issue? So say I have a
teenager who has emotionaloutbursts, right? I'm going to
(09:59):
look at it. Right? My bias mightbe, I got a disrespectful child,
right? I would never talk to myparents that way. My parents
would would knock me into nextweek if I talk to them like
that. That's the bias, right? Itis. So when we go down to E
(10:19):
evaluating the situation, wemight find out that our child
might be getting bullied atschool. We might find out that
maybe because who I'm dating, ormaybe because I recently am
going through a divorce orsomething, or we just broke up,
(10:42):
or me and the other parent arenot getting along, and it is
affecting my child. Okay,
TD Flenaugh (10:47):
so we're really thinking about evaluating and
maybe even not blaming my child,but looking to see what my role
might be in it.
Latoya Nichole (10:56):
Yes, because in conscious parenting, the problem
is never the child. The problemis the problem. And a lot of
people treat the problem as ifit's the child.
TD Flenaugh (11:04):
The problem is never the child, the problem is
the problem. Okay, get thisbook. Okay, I gotta start
looking at myself. I might bedoing something wrong,
Latoya Nichole (11:17):
or might even find out that, yeah, we might
even find out that our child isjust acting out because they
they miss having time with us.
Maybe you're spending more timewith the other kids and you're
not giving them enough time,right? That's evaluating the
situation. Once you're able toevaluate it, like, okay, I can
see what's going on. So when youget to the L portion, which is
(11:38):
love, you're like, how do I loveon my child through this
situation? How do I love on mychild through this situation?
Maybe I need to plan more one onone time with my child. Maybe I
need to get my child intocounseling. You know, maybe I
need to go up to the school, setan appointment with the guidance
(11:59):
counselor see what's going on atschool. You know, you never know
these kids. They have so muchgoing on. And sometimes we're so
caught up in our own life thatwe neglect to understand that
they have lives too. Mm, andthat's heavy the thoughtful
parenting. That's that consciousparenting. I think mindfulness.
(12:23):
How do you how do you approachthem in that way? So on the
worksheet, you actually have alittle section where you put in
your action plan. So you mightsay, Okay, now my action plan
is, I'm going to plan one on onedates with my child. Once a
week, I'm going to go up to theschool and make sure that
(12:43):
nothing's wrong with my childschool wise, you know, okay,
talk to my child and say, maybe,you know, give them a audit. I
love telling people to audit,audit, audit yourself. Audit
yourself. Towards your kids, askthem, What am I doing? I like to
go with the negative first.
Okay, do to be a better parentto you, because they, if you, if
(13:07):
you give them the space and theyfeel comfortable enough, they
will hurt your feelings. So letme,
TD Flenaugh (13:11):
let me just pause for a second, because you do
have to really be in a differentspace, right? Because if you're
in this space where I'm justbusy. I'm too busy to deal with
this, I'm too busy to deal withthat, then this isn't gonna
work. So I really have to bereflective about myself. So I
have to do some work. Like thisis my dress. You know, it's easy
(13:34):
to pick up that belt, right?
Isn't that easy?
Latoya Nichole (13:37):
Look? Um, you
TD Flenaugh (13:38):
want me to take on some blame and everything I
gotta take on somebody. Man,
Latoya Nichole (13:46):
yes, you do. You do. But the good thing is, is,
after you ask them that, askthem, because after you feeling
hurt, you gonna need to hearsome good. What am I doing?
Good? What do I need to keepdoing okay. What do you love
about me being being your mom?
Okay, that way you feel goodabout yourself. Okay. Look, it's
(14:06):
not all bad. Work over here. Butguess what? They still left me.
They still okay.
TD Flenaugh (14:12):
Can you take us back to like, what caused this
switch for you? Because, as youstated earlier, you already were
into it, right? You got weaponsat a child, your kids getting
weapons, and then somehow youdecided to change this. So what
changed you? What was the thing?
Latoya Nichole (14:31):
It is, the realization of turning into my
mother, as real as that sounds,
TD Flenaugh (14:40):
tell us more about that.
Latoya Nichole (14:42):
I don't want to be my mother. I don't want to be
running around the house withthe belt in one hand fussing and
cussing at everybody. You knowhow stressful that is. Your
blood pressure high? Mm, youstressed out. You got a
headache. Hair falling out, allthat stuff. All because you want
everybody to get in line. Andyou just the Wicked Witch of the
(15:05):
West with the belt. Everybodycan get it. But no, that's
that's happening there. When wethink about it, it's crazy. You
see them women that be in thestore busting and cussing at
their kids, threatening some ofthem even, even put their hands
on their kids in the store. Theydon't care. But when you're
(15:26):
around somebody like that thatis stressful to you. You're
like, oh my god, like you coulddo this in so many other ways.
There's a big line. There's abig line between the behavior
and get in the belt, you have awhole list of other things that
you can do before you get to thebell, and that's why I'm here.
(15:51):
It's like, okay, there's thingsthat you can do that you can
better understand your child.
You can correct the behavior andensure that they don't do it
again, and even if they do,guess what? How many times did
it take your hard headed behindto figure something out? You
know, we all, we look we allhard headed
TD Flenaugh (16:12):
fast. Yes, hold that thought, because we're
gonna be on a break and thenwe're gonna get back to it okay
for the United States, 75% ofchildren don't know how to
write. Well, add that to thefact that so many people out
there are trying to silence thevoices of those who have been
oppressed and trying to preventthem from telling their story.
(16:35):
Who's going to tell your storyif your child doesn't know how
to write? Well, I have two booksto address this issue, the
rewrite method and the rewritemethod workbook grid tend to
make sure that parents know whatto do, that educators know what
to do to get their children towrite better and just not write
better, but love to write. Makesure that your next generation
(16:58):
could tell their story and theywon't be silenced. Go to
fallingforlearning.com today topurchase your set. Okay, so we
are with Toya Nicole. We'regoing to continue to talk about
how she made the switch fromwhooping her kids, just like
she's been taught as a kid. Youknow, she got whoopings As a
(17:20):
child, many of us did, and shedid the same thing with her
kids, but she made this switch.
How is this different than isconscious parenting and like the
gentle parenting the same? Or isthere a different?
Latoya Nichole (17:33):
Oh, it is not the same. Actually, I get
offended by just a parentingbecause when you think of gentle
parenting, you think of Charlie,stop
TD Flenaugh (17:44):
that, stop that Johnny. Oh my gosh. Stop,
Johnny. Stop everybody.
Latoya Nichole (17:50):
Everybody thinks of this when they hear gentle
parenting, is that, that lazyparenting, that permissive
parenting, you going to say thesame thing, there's no
discipline, there's noboundaries, you know, but
conscious parenting is not thatit's about having the
boundaries. It's about havingemotional intelligence. It knows
(18:13):
that kids are going to test theboundaries. Here's how you put a
safety device in place, justlike when you go bowling. You
know, they put the bumpers up.
I'm just passing it, the bumper,okay, it's the bumpers for the
kids. It's like, Yo, I knowyou're going to be a kid and
you're going to do things thatkids do, but I'm your safety
net. I'm your safety net.
TD Flenaugh (18:35):
So that, I mean, that's so is it a good analogy?
Like to to understand? Can youtell us about, like, maybe some
missteps that happened along theway, or some real takeaways that
you had as you were doing this,as you've been making the
change?
Latoya Nichole (18:53):
So yes, I will always say that I am not a
perfect parent, and this is ajourney, but I've been in this
journey long enough to guideyou, and because I used to beat
my kids first, I'm better athelping you, because most
(19:14):
conscious parenting coaches havenot gone through this before,
and It's really just being ableto, in the moment, just stop and
not fuss and cuss and be like,Okay, what is going on in this
situation? How do I be smarterthan my kid? Because my kid
(19:34):
thinks they're smarter than me,not like, seriously, I'm not
kidding you. Nine times out of10 these kids think they're
smarter than us. Tell us more.
You have to be the one smarter.
And a lot of times it's justlike, Yo, I gotta understand
what my kid is thinking.
TD Flenaugh (19:50):
Wait a minute, what do you mean by they? They think
we're smarter. Tell us more.
Like, break that down. So
Latoya Nichole (19:55):
you ever, you ever, oh, what's going. It. You
know how you tell your kids, goclean go clean your room, right?
Clean your room. And, you know,if you will, you you walk away.
You tell them, Go clean theirroom. You walk away, right? You
go, do your own thing. Guesswhat they're doing, not cleaning
that room, right, right? Yeah,they're not cleaning that room.
(20:19):
And the first thing out yourmouth is like, Yo, you want to
be like, Did I tell you to cleanyour room? But guess what?
That's not going to get the roomclean right. And what stresses
you out? It stresses your kidout, right? Instead, you can
(20:40):
actually set timers. You cangive them a goal list, like,
hey, what do you want to dofirst? You want to clean this up
first. You want to not cleanthis up. Or do you want to clean
that up first? And guess what?
They're still going to even ifyou give them tasks before they
even get into it. Because my sonis so guilty of this. Okay,
Mike, look, go clean your room.
(21:09):
He gives this whole theatricalperformance he's going to get
out of cleaning his room. Itnever works unless I'm in the
mood where I'm like, You knowwhat? I don't care, and I let it
go, because sometimes it's notthat serious, and sometimes it's
like, Look, son, if you don'tclean your room, CPS going to
(21:29):
come get you, you're going to beliving in foster care, and
you're not even going to haveyour own room. You want to share
a bed with like 10 other people.
Look, you exaggerate it as muchas you want to. You can even
pull up Foster, foster parentingstories on the Internet. We're
they're there. Look, I'm notsaying scare your kids, but
sometimes you gotta let themknow, like you gotta, but still,
(21:51):
you can break it down intosmaller tasks, because it
honestly as soon as you walkaway, they're not going to do
anything because they'reoverwhelmed. But that goes back
to conscious parenting and beingmindful and evaluating the
situation. You know who yourkids are. You know how they act.
(22:11):
You know how they're going toreact certain things. How do you
stage it in a way that you don'tget a reaction out of them. Oh,
I know my kid likes to playvideo games, so guess what? This
is, what's going to be the goalat the at the end, like, look at
how clean your room is. Now youget to play video games to the
(22:32):
rest of night, and I don't haveto bother you because your room
is clean. Okay, that makessense. Yeah. So they really do
need it broken down into littletests for them.
TD Flenaugh (22:49):
So I like a lot about what you said, you know,
giving them a smaller task,making it digestible for them,
because kids do get overwhelmedby, you know, the room might be
very dirty, and so how do I getstarted? What do I do?
Latoya Nichole (23:07):
Like a tornado,
TD Flenaugh (23:10):
right? It's just easier to put it off. You know,
if you yell a little bit like Imight be used to you yelling, I
could just
Latoya Nichole (23:19):
ignore it, which is what they do, like,
seriously, yeah, for sure. Okay,so you said gentle parents, and
I told you, I was like, Oh, Idon't like that term, yeah,
there is no difference between,to me, there's no difference
between that gentle parent andthat parent that that's
constantly yelling at theirkids. Okay, before they get the
(23:41):
belt, you're both yelling,yelling, yelling, saying the
same thing over and over and notdoing anything about it. Mm, the
only difference is one parentgoes and gets the belt after
they get frustrated, the otherone doesn't do anything.
TD Flenaugh (23:55):
I see So what changes have you seen in your
kids since you did this becausewe did talk about that
generational health. So whatchanges have you seen in them?
So
Latoya Nichole (24:06):
I see them, they are happier. I don't get a lot
of pushback for a lot of things.
I see that my children are veryself sufficient. They will take
the initiative to do a lot ofthings on their own. I did have
make a video the other day, myson was cleaning out the toilet.
He was using my dish. It's inthe trash now. But how can I be
(24:29):
mad at a child that took theinitiative to clean whether they
did it right or wrong? I'm notgoing to be mad at him doing it
wrong. I'm just happy that hedid it, because that's positive
reinforcement. Kids literallyoperate off positive
(24:49):
reinforcement. If you want tosee positive behaviors,
reinforce it, praise them forit, even if it's like not
perfect. It. It don't gotta beperfect. Just let them know I
appreciate you. Thank you. Likebe oh yes, give them all the
praises like I I would havenever thought of that you are so
(25:14):
smart. Sometimes they think theylike I said, they think they
smarter than you. How to letthem think it sometimes,
sometimes you gotta let themthink it. We know the truth,
right? We have more lifeexperience, but sometimes they
want to have a say in how thingsgo in their own environment.
Their home is supposed to betheir safe space.
TD Flenaugh (25:37):
Yeah,
Latoya Nichole (25:38):
so if you're you're walking around like a
tyrant and treating everybody inthe household, um, like they're
your subjects. Then imagine howthat that works out for you.
TD Flenaugh (25:50):
Yeah. So tell me about your book, putting down
the belt. Like, how did it comeabout? You know, give me some
background on it.
Latoya Nichole (26:02):
So there is no book out there about how to put
down a belt. I realized thatlike that, which is crazy, but
the way that the book came aboutwas through the morning meetup.
Um, they says, you know, youneed a formula to be able to
help people something that youcan easily refer to. And it was
(26:24):
somebody else, nayetta from theactivity Playhouse. She's, yeah,
she's like, oh, you know when Ithink of you and I think of your
brand, I think about the belt.
Okay,
TD Flenaugh (26:36):
could you pause for a moment like, I don't know if
people know what the morningmeet up is, so just let them
know what it is.
Latoya Nichole (26:42):
So the morning Meetup is, oh, it's a group for
entrepreneurs who want to do butbigger and better things in
their business, right? Cometogether and meet every day,
Monday through Friday, to towhere we can gain insights and
have community when it comes toour business. I mean, that's how
we know each other. Yes,
TD Flenaugh (27:03):
we have Friday morning. Yes, alright, so you're
telling us, you know, one of thethings for your business is,
have that your consciousparenting brand, and you had, so
one of the members was talkingabout, you know, they think
about the belt and then take itfrom there, what would put
Latoya Nichole (27:25):
together for you somebody? And I was like, oh,
man, I can't, I can't think of,like, what would go with the
belt? Like, what would go withthe belt? So I had someone else
give me some words for theacronyms. And the longer I
looked at I was like, This isnot my brand. This is not my
brand at all. But I was able toreplace the words that you that
(27:49):
you now know, which is breakingbiases, evaluating the
situation, love and thoughtfulparenting, which represents my
brand, and this is somethingthat I could use to help people
put down the belt. Yes, so, and,of course, I applied a worksheet
in there, because sometimes it'snot enough to just have the
(28:10):
information. Sometimes you needto be able to write out your
problems, kind of likejournaling. Yes,
TD Flenaugh (28:18):
it's, it's wonderful. I mean, looking
through it, and really, youknow, I say people need to go
out and get it. It's soimportant. You know, part of
being an entrepreneur isleveling up yourself, and, you
know, it's also changingyourself and changing your
practices. And that doesn'thappen, you know, it happens
(28:40):
through reflection. It happensthrough all of that. And then
that's obviously what consciousparenting is thinking about. You
know what happened with us whenwe were kids, and how we could
improve upon that? Right? Wewant our children to do better
than what we had. We want themto be able to grow beyond what
we were able to grow, rightabout that legacy building, and
(29:04):
you don't have to pick oranges,you know, your grandparent did
that for you, and now you'regoing to give your child more
than what you had, you know. So,I mean, it's good. We need to
think about what we're doing.
Some of the things, like yousaid, we did, you know, rooted
in slavery. You know, we we'llbeat the kids and nobody else
will beat them, you know, kindof thing. Um, so
Latoya Nichole (29:29):
it's important eating kids never kept them out
of jail. Imma tell you that nowyou go to jail. Ask them who I
got a whooping. I guarantee you
TD Flenaugh (29:43):
very true, right?
We thought that, yeah, yeah. Soit's something we have to think
about. We just do things andjust to keep doing them, because
that's how it was when I had itis, we need to think beyond
that, right? And we're so gladthat you've joined us. And
you're spreading this messagewith people because, you know,
we don't know what we don'tknow, right? You just continue
(30:05):
to do the same practices. We'regoing to get the same results
right. We want to have we wantour kids to have more right. Our
program falling for learning isabout making sure that kids are
on track for learning and stayon track for success. And so
part of that, of course, isacademics, but also it has to be
about our relationships, abouttheir health and wellness as
(30:28):
well. So it's
Latoya Nichole (30:32):
the foundation of their life. Absolutely want
to build a strong foundation sothey can self sustain, because
eventually they're going toleave the nest.
TD Flenaugh (30:45):
Yes, yes. And what are some, you know, final
thoughts that you could give toour guests out there who are now
hearing your message and aregoing to consider what to do,
what? What are some finalthoughts.
Latoya Nichole (31:01):
So one of the biggest things I want to let
people know is that it's okay.
One, I don't judge people. Iunderstand, like, you know, I
tell people what I do. And somepeople are, like, taken aback by
it. But I do want you to know,like, if you beat your kids, and
(31:22):
I'm not going to judge you bywhat you have in your diaper
bag. These were the tools thatwere handed down to you. I am
here to help you put more toolsin your diaper bag. I'm giving
you more accessories that youcan use on your parenting
journey. Um, that's all I'm hereto do. I want to be the change
that I see in the world, and Istarted in my own home, in my
(31:44):
own mind. Thank you. Thank you.
TD Flenaugh (31:48):
Thanks again for supporting the falling for
learning podcast. New Episodesgo live every Saturday at 5pm
you can watch us on youtube.com,at falling for learning, or
listen on all major podcastplatforms such as Apple, Google,
(32:08):
Audible, Spotify and much morefor more resources, visit
falling in love withlearning.com. We really
appreciate you. Have a wonderfulweek.
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