November 8, 2025 • 26 mins
Is your child the next big thing? Parents and educators can use these simple strategies to help children reach their full potential! TD Flenaugh and guest Albert Bramante discuss strategies for nurturing children's talents and overcoming self-doubt. Albert, a talent agent and performance coach, emphasizes the importance of fostering curiosity and involvement in various activities. He shares his journey from aspiring clinical psychologist to talent agent, highlighting the impact of 9/11 on his career path. Albert's book, "Rise Above the Script," addresses self-esteem, self-efficacy, and self-sabotage, offering practical tips like deep breathing and reframing fear as excitement. He advises parents to support their children's growth through encouragement and practical experiences, emphasizing the long-term nature of a career in acting.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
TD Flenaugh (00:03):
A star is born.
Many of us, parents andeducators recognize that the
kids that are in our care may besomeone who's a future star.
They may be great at performing.
They might have exceptionaltalent. How do we develop that
talent to make sure that kidsare pursuing their dreams and
they're rising to their fullpotential. Hi. Thank you so much
(00:26):
for joining the falling forlearning podcast. We have this
podcast to help parents andcaregivers with having the
resources, strategies and toolsneeded to make sure that their
children are on track forlearning and to stay on track
for success. Our next guest,Albert Bramante is a talent
agent and performance coach whoare going to give us some
(00:48):
strategies and insights abouthow to help our kids on their
journey to greatness.
Albert Bramante (00:54):
Thank you for having
TD Flenaugh (00:56):
me on here. So Albert, we always have our
guests talk about the thing thatmade them fall in love with
learning. What was that thingfor you? For
Albert Bramante (01:04):
me, it was just a natural proclivity toward
reading and discovering newthings. As a child, I was an
avid reader. I still am, but Ialways I love to read. And for
me, that was my comfort, mysolace, my sanctuary was a
library, and so I just reallyenjoyed learning about new
things. I was always a curiouskid, asked a lot of questions,
(01:27):
was sometimes even chastised forbeing nosy. But I get just I'm
just curious. I bring that tocuriosity, and I think that's
what really helped me getthrough things. You know,
anybody my own life, is justlearning, you know, especially
loving to read. I love books.
Yeah, and being an authormyself, I just, I've always
loved books and still do. So forme, it's, I've always I fell in
(01:51):
love with learning, and I feellike, you know, Michael in life
is just people learning, and I'ma lifelong learner. And you
know, even being out of schoolfor so many years, I feel like
I'm always learning. And I thinkthat's a mindset that all of us
should be
TD Flenaugh (02:07):
having absolutely so could you tell us about what
kind of activities you weren'tin as a child? What's your
education background that ledyou to your career?
Albert Bramante (02:18):
Sure. Well, I was always involved. I mean,
when I was in, you know,elementary middle school, I was
a type of child, because I was,I'm the youngest of five, and my
half siblings are much olderthan I am, and so I kind of
essentially was the only child.
So I didn't really have thatmany peers to grow up with. And
so I was more the adult, adult.
(02:41):
I was hanging out with theadults table and the, you know,
sitting at the adults table, Ididn't have a hard time really
adjusting to other children, butI spent, I would say, a good
part of my junior high in highschool being very involved. You
know, different clubs, differentorganizations, including the
school newspaper, the dramaclub, the, you know, all these
(03:03):
different service organizations.
And even in college, you know,my undergraduate studies, I was
very much involved, you know, somany different organizations.
And for me, that was just soimportant, you know, I think
it's just to to be a part ofdifferent groups and communities
and so that's what really fueledme. I mean, with community, I
(03:24):
would say the biggest aspect ofmy education so
TD Flenaugh (03:30):
amazing. Okay, so tell us about, you know, the
education that you had or theexperience that led you to your
career as a talent agent andperformance coach,
Albert Bramante (03:42):
sure? Well, I worked several different hats,
and I when I was like 1516, Imade this declaration that I was
going to be a psychology major.
Okay? Because I was readingbooks in high school such as How
to Win Friends and InfluencePeople by Dale Carnegie, Seven
Habits of Highly EffectivePeople. So I really became just
curious about self improvementand self help, so I just really
(04:03):
wanted to study psychology formy undergraduate and bachelor's
degree. I took some classes intheater at that time. I was not
really intending to be anythingin the in the arts. I was really
intended to be a clinicalpsychologist and college
professor, you know, my mom wasa first grade teacher for 31
years. My dad, you know, was afootball coach. My oldest
(04:25):
brother was a football coach. SoI think that between the
coaching and teaching educationwas in my blood falling and full
throat. Then I did my master'sdegree in psychology with a
focus on consecration, marriageand family therapy and again,
still looking to be a psych,clinical psychologist. I didn't
(04:45):
get into a PhD program run away,so I had to work. And I had to,
kind of work, you know, go intosocial services. Now right
around this is right after Ireceived my master's degree.
Unfortunately. It was the sameyear of 911 and so, you know,
being that I'm New Jersey in NewJersey was very close to, you
know, New York City, and so,okay, some my contacts who were
(05:09):
part of the 911 were needed,needed help to volunteers, like
recruited a number of us, my,you know, myself, included a
bunch of actors and filmmakersand directors, and it kind of
brought my interest back frombeing in a drama club and being
being, you know, an actingclass. How much I enjoyed it. So
I was like, Okay, Link, tried athing as an actor. Now for me,
(05:30):
it wasn't so much being anactor, but I think what it
boiled down to was the theatercommunity and ethnic community.
I really felt seen as a person,and I really felt like I
belonged here, you know, in thiscommunity. So, you know, right
around this time, I also gothot, started filling one part of
my dream was I got hired toteach as an adjunct at the time
(05:53):
in the community college inpsychology. So I started doing
that, and I really loved it. Andbut then, you know the thing
about, well, what do I do as faras acting wise? I said, Well,
I'm not interested so much ofbeing an actor myself, but I
enjoy working with actors. Iwant to support actors as much
as possible. So then I thought,Well, why don't I represent
(06:15):
them? And so 2004 I started myfirst company, you know, from
home and managing actors. Andthen this is right around the
same time I decided I'm going togo back to my PhD. And in the
middle of my PhD studies, youknow, it's kind of launching the
talent business, as well asstill teaching part time. But
(06:36):
the one thing that kept comingup with self sabotage and, you
know, blocks, fear, success,imposter syndrome. And so I
decided I was gonna do mydoctoral dissertation on self
defeating, behavior performingartists, right? And so that was
like turning point where I wasable to bring both of my worlds
together, my love that thing,but also the psychology and the
(06:58):
mindset work that come withthat. So that's how I that
started. And then, you know,many years later, I decided to,
you know, write my, you know,publishing book, writing of the
script, which deals with selfdoubt and self sabotage, okay?
And working with the 1000s ofactors as well as students. That
was the one thing that came up alot was self sabotage and fear
(07:21):
of success and other blocks,like really getting your own
way, and how we can be,sometimes be our own worst
enemy.
TD Flenaugh (07:31):
Yeah. Can you give us like, one example of self
sabotage?
Albert Bramante (07:35):
Well, in my context, it would be like the
the actor, for example, who youknow, does shows up late to
appointments, the actor whodoesn't prepare fully, of the
actor who decides even to blowoff an appointment or an
audition, you know, just reallythings that are like, kind of
taking themselves out of therace, or the out of the
opportunity too fast withoutbecause it's a tough industry
(07:58):
already to break into,regardless, right? It's like,
now you're kind of like beingyour own worst enemy,
TD Flenaugh (08:03):
right? So you don't even have an opportunity.
They're not going to consideryou because you didn't show up,
you came really late, somethinglike that. Okay? And then what
happened? Like, what are somethings that happen in self
doubt? Or, how does that happen?
You explain more about that,sure?
Albert Bramante (08:21):
Well, what, what can happen there? What's
what out it's you start to getthat inner critic that pops in
there, that the I don't know ifI can do this. I know if I'm
good enough, I'm trained enough.
Oh my, I'm just little, all me.
And then it just starts to say,You know what, I'm not gonna
really do this. I'm not gonnapursue this, even though I
(08:41):
really want to deep down inside,I'm just not going to do it. And
therefore it just like we startshrinking inside, and then
therefore we just, we don'treally let, let our, let our
light shine through, in a sense,
TD Flenaugh (08:55):
okay, and so when we, you know, with our audience,
really supporting kids aseducators and caregivers. What
are some things that we could dofor kids as they're, you know,
sometimes they might be actingright? They may have, you know,
big roles that they're up for,but they may also have, like,
smaller roles, speeches,different things like that. What
(09:16):
are some things that we could doto help support them when some
of the self doubt or even selfsabotage is happening.
Albert Bramante (09:22):
Well, really to one thing you want to do is
build like, initiative, autonomyand really competence, and
that's what you're doing withchildren, and it's really
encouragement. Is very powerfulencouragement, and not being so
concerned as a parent with theoutcome, you know, more more of
like, enjoy praising theprocess. So, for example,
(09:45):
instead of, instead of, like,you know, even if the child
messes up or or exposes theirpractice, to keep reinforcing
the idea that they're workinghard for it, so you're you're
crazy, rather than the outcome.
So therefore you're teachingperseverance and the importance
of grit and hard work, andrather than, again, the outcome
(10:07):
like, it's not about winning,it's not about losing, it's not
about whether you're going toget the role or not. It's about
working hard. It's aboutputting, you know, giving it
your all and being okay withwhatever the outcome is not
being attached to the outcome,and this is even for adult
actors too, is to just do yourbest and not be so concerned
(10:30):
with the outcome.
TD Flenaugh (10:41):
The rewrite method and the rewrite method workbook
are your go to resource forhelping kids to learn to fall in
love with writing. It has thetips, tools, resources,
strategies and skill buildingactivities to help kids fall out
(11:07):
of writing heat and into lovingto write. Get your book set
today youall right, I love that praising
the process and really focusingon the effort and detaching
(11:30):
yourselves from the outcome. Sothose are some great strategies,
some gems that will be veryhelpful for our audience
members. What are some things todo when the self doubt is coming
in? Because obviously you couldhelp coach them. But what are
(11:52):
some things that we could tellthem to say or do, to help them
when they're like on stage andthe self doubt is creeping up,
you know, in the in the moment,
Albert Bramante (12:04):
yeah, well, physiologically, take a deep
breath in. Deep breathing isvery powerful, calm, deep breath
in. And just even, like simplephrases, like, I got this, I got
this, you know, you say that toyourself, I got this. And you
move forward. And one of thethings that were were really
wired to pay attention to fear,and that's exactly a brain is
(12:25):
designed to help us survive. Soit's doing its job by sometimes
creating this tension in ourbody, because it's we're an
unfamiliar territory, we're anunfamiliar ground, an unknown
land. So again, it's gonna seekthat fear, but instead, like
saying, I got this, and you knowwhat, whether you're whether
(12:45):
you're giving a speech, whetheryou're giving a performance, the
idea here is to almost reframethat nerves that you're getting,
that maybe that uneasiness, thatqueasiness in your stomach is,
instead of saying, like, well,this means I'm nervous. No, it
means you're excited. Because ifyou look at the the emotion of
excitement and anxiety in thebody, physiologically, they're
(13:06):
very similar. State,interesting, okay, instead of
saying I'm fearful, I'm doing Imust be fearful. No, I'm doing
this because I'm excited. I
TD Flenaugh (13:16):
love that idea reframing that fear as
excitement and really thinkingabout, you know, things that you
could do, such as breathingright, which we hear a lot, but
helping students, kids practicethat in the moment, practice
that, and then actually, whenthey're in the moment, you know,
they could apply it and actuallyuse it. And it could be
(13:37):
something to help them moveforward. That's really great,
great ideas that we need tothink about and really implement
with our students and ourchildren as they are getting out
of their comfort zone. Becausethat is what performing is. Out
of the comfort zone. It isunknown territory, often when,
even if you've done somethingbefore, but within the the new
(14:00):
performance is a new audience,and it is a new new territory,
like you said, so reframingthose ideas and really able to
move forward, because we wantour kids to reach their full
potential, but for them to thinkabout fear in a more objective
way and then reframe their fearAs excitement. Really, really,
think those are very helpfulstrategies that you're sharing
(14:24):
with us, absolutely. So can youtell us about your book and how
it relates to your coaching? Andsure you're
Albert Bramante (14:33):
it's, I have a different backed up by research
and personal, you know, storiesand experience. So it's based,
it's follows, the foundation ofmy doctoral dissertation. The
outline, I talk about selfesteem. You know, my first part
of the book is self esteem, andI talk about the consequences,
the extremes of self esteem,when it's too low, how it's a
(14:54):
problem. Sometimes being toohigh can be what I call toxic
high self esteem, or, like, youknow, a little bit. Pomp, you
know, pompousness, grandiosityand all that, and how that can
lead to self sabotage too,because then we're not open to
criticism, and that we're notreally, you know, we're not
really open to change. And thenpart two, I talk about a concept
known as self efficacy, which Ifeel is so important for
(15:16):
children and education. And selfefficacy is really your your
belief or your competence in acertain task or domain. And if
you're performing in any type ofway, you really have to have a
high degree of self efficacy inyour in your acting ability,
performing ability, speakingability, your athletic ability,
whatever it is you're performingas so. And then there's another
(15:37):
part where I talk aboutpersonality, particularly a five
factor model, which is, youknow, openness,
conscientiousness, extroversion,agreeableness and eroticism, and
how all those play into them,how this relates to self
sabotage is usually those thatare high in eroticism, which is
really referred to how prone youare to anxiety and and and how
(15:57):
easily your face, like peoplethat are high in neuroticism
tend to be very easily upset ortriggered or angered, whatever
it is, and an emotional extreme.
And you couple that with low andconscientiousness, which is
discipline and focus. And that'sa perfect recipe for self
sabotage, I see. And then thelast part of the book, but the
final part is on fear successand a couple of different things
(16:20):
that talk about relationships.
You know, sometimes when you'resuccessful, relationships may
change, because your life isgoing to change. And then
there's another chapter I talkabout money, your relationship
with money, okay, and how thataffects you. And it says that
every part of the chapter,there's some helpful strategies
(16:42):
in there. So while the book isreally geared towards actors,
you know, for performingartists, there's a lot of stuff
that's in there that really,anybody can get, can gain
something from, you know, whodeals with self doubt and self
you know, and sometimes thatimposter syndrome and you know,
and that's everybody, prettymuch, you know, I'm really
(17:02):
fundamentally,
TD Flenaugh (17:03):
wow. Okay, so tell us the title of your book one
more time.
Albert Bramante (17:06):
Sure, it's rise above the script, confronting
self doubt and mastering selfsabotage for performing art,
TD Flenaugh (17:13):
wonderful. Okay, and we're and we are going to
have a link to that in the shownotes, right? Okay, all right.
And if people want to reach outto you where they're going to
go,
Albert Bramante (17:24):
Sure, you can go to my you can go to my agency
website, vermonte artists.comand feel free to reach out to me
there, especially if anyquestions about acting, or, you
know, if you have questionsabout performance, I'd be happy
to reach out to you there. Youcan also find me on socialism,
on LinkedIn and Instagram, andyou know, you can feel free to
send me a direct message, andI'd be happy to chat with
TD Flenaugh (17:47):
you, great. So getting back to your work, what
are some things that you noticethat people really get wrong?
They do things that are reallyset them up for it doesn't set
them up for fail. I mean, itkind of sets them up for
failure. Besides, like, selfsabotage, what are other things
that they do?
Albert Bramante (18:06):
A big one is perfectionism, expecting every
or expecting everything to beperfect. And one of the
statements is related to that,is, is I really feel like being
not ready is a lie. Like, whenyou tell yourself you're not
ready, it's really you'redeceiving yourself. So I often
say not ready is a lie. And thereason why that happens is
because there's no such thing asa perfect human being. We're
(18:28):
gonna make mistakes all thetime. And I think when we're
waiting to do something becausewe want it to be perfect. That
you know, not ready to do thisyet. I need more training. I
need not ready to implement thatbecause I need more experience.
And I think that if you keep inthat pattern, it's like a never
ending loop, you'll never beready, right? And so the
(18:48):
important thing is to do it, tojust do it, take action, and
even if, if it doesn't go thedirection you plan, or it
doesn't land the way you wantit, to consider that a learning
opportunity. So there's no suchthing as failure, only feedback.
So you're failing forward, in asense. So I think that's
important, is to learn that noteverything, everything that that
(19:10):
doesn't work out, is a badbecause to be upset about or to
dwell on, it's a learningexperience. It gives you good
feedback. It's like now, now youknow what to do differently. So
that's very important,
TD Flenaugh (19:23):
that's really good.
So being not ready is a lie,that you really are ready, but
you're worried about it notbeing perfect and taking the
action is going to lead you,give you some experience, going
to give you some learning, goingto give you feedback. So failure
actually reframe it as feedback,right? Okay, yes, I really love
(19:45):
that. Okay, all right. And whatgets people what do you think as
an like, with actors, like, whathas been the thing that really
propels people forward whenthey're thinking about their
performance?
Albert Bramante (20:00):
Are growing.
What really propels them forwardis mindset and a growth mindset,
and that's all about, likelooking as opportunities for
growth. In a sense, that'swhat's important is, you know,
just learning to grow, moveforward. That's the one thing I
would say, also just again beingalso around a good support
(20:21):
system too. You know, you wantto be around a good network, and
network that elevate you, thatwill support you, rather than
tear you down. And that's why Ibelieve proximity is power, you
know, and I'll borrow that fromlike Tony Robbins and, you know,
yes, Jim Rohn, and thatproximity is power, and I think
that is so important. So youwant to have a good network
(20:44):
that's going to support you, andyou want to be around other
parents that are going to helpelevate you and support you, and
be around other children youknow your children, be around
other children that will inspirethem and to lift them up so and
there's always expression thatone of my mentors that said, you
want to be around people thatwill celebrate you and not
tolerate
TD Flenaugh (21:01):
you. Nice, celebrate you and not tolerate
you. So many gems. Thank you somuch. Albert Monte for just
bringing all of this togetherfor us and really thinking about
that. What are if someone wantsto be an actor or an actress as
an adult, what are some thingsthat they could do for their
kids now to help them move inthat direction?
Albert Bramante (21:24):
Well, I would say, first, get them in some
theater classes, whether it's intheir school or in their
community. Let them do somecommunity theater. Get the
experience of being on stage,working with the script, working
with practicing auditioning. Andthen just get them like, you
know, get them involved in someacting classes from different
acting schools. And that's thebiggest thing is, like learning
(21:46):
to network, and they can startmeeting other actors and other
theater professionals, and theycan start just building from
there. And then, you know, onceyou're establishing you would
need professional headshots,which are you would get that
from a photographer who doesacting headshots on portrait
shots or not glamor shots, butactual headshots. And so you
would need that. And with thattraining, you would then start,
(22:07):
you know, putting yourselfonline. There's different
websites for actors, like actorsaccess and casting networks,
which I can certainly get, youknow, if anything reaches out to
me, I can certainly guide them.
But that would be the nextsteps. Is to just put yourself
out there. But the main thing toreally know is that this is a
career. This is not a overnightsensation. So you we may have
hear some stories of peoplehaving a big break, but
(22:29):
sometimes what the reality is,it took them 15 years to get
that break right. So it's a lotof work. It's a great, rewarding
profession. Somebody who wantsto do this great but do
understand that this is acareer. This is a, not it. This
is a, you know, not a sprint, ajourney. So it's going to take
time and and a long time, andfor, especially for younger
(22:50):
actors, because I work, youknow, one live with adults, but
even those that are graduatingfrom college and, you know,
moving to New York or they'regoing to help Los Angeles or
even Atlanta. The importantthing to know is that you need
almost a 10 or 15 or 20 yearplan if you're if this is what
you want to do when. And I'massuming it is, but it's not
going to be an overnightsuccess. It's not going to be an
(23:12):
overnight sensation. It's goingto take time, but it's very
rewarding, because, again, mostof the actors I know that I work
with, don't do it for the thing.
Don't do it for the externalrewards. More about the
internal, like the intrinsic ofbeing able to tell a story and
be able to bring a character
TD Flenaugh (23:29):
to life, right?
Okay, well, that's interesting.
I you know, I haven't researchedit very much, but just to hear
that 10 to 20 year plan, it's acareer, I think is really good
advice. I think a lot of peopledo think, you know, you get just
discovered, and you're on thathit show or movie and it's like
you're doing it, yeah, where thereality is doesn't really match
(23:54):
that ideal. Okay, yeah, that'sgood. That's good to know. Okay,
well, are there any you knowfinal takeaways that you want to
give to our audience? Well,
Albert Bramante (24:03):
I'm glad that you know this podcast exists,
and thank you for putting ittogether, because I feel like
it's so important for thechildren. I mean, I know it's
cliche, but children of thefuture, and I think that we
really need to be setting thefoundation so that I don't have
to be coaching that much whenI'm when they're an adult,
because they already have thetools to be able to handle, you
(24:25):
know, challenges and diversityand be able to push through
them. So we need to start at anearly age, because technically,
if you really think about weshould have all the resources we
need to succeed by the timewe're adults. And sometimes, you
know, there may be, you know,benefit will have the best
childhood, or we're dealing withour own trauma. Sometimes those
resources can be or that wisdomcan be blocked or impeded. So
(24:48):
it's important to kind of workthrough that and to and that's
where a coach can come in tokind of tap, help you tap into
that your own inner greatness.
TD Flenaugh (24:56):
Okay, all right.
And so again. Look out forAlbert Bramante on his social
media and his website again onemore time,
Albert Bramante (25:07):
and that's Bramante artists.com Okay,
TD Flenaugh (25:10):
and we appreciate you so much for coming on to our
show dropping so many gems abouthow to bolster children through
their confidence and reallycoach them into the next level
of performance. Thank you somuch again. And for parents and
our educators out there, pleasedo something today that is going
(25:32):
to give the children you serve acompetitive advantage. Thanks
again. Thank you. Thanks againfor supporting the falling for
learning podcast, new episodesgo live every Saturday at 5pm
you can watch us on youtube.com,at falling for learning, or
listen on all major podcastplatforms such as Apple, Google,
(25:57):
Audible, Spotify and much morefor more resources, visit
falling in love withlearning.com we really
appreciate you. Have a wonderfulweek.
A star is born.
Many of us, parents andeducators recognize that the
kids that are in our care may besomeone who's a future star.
They may be great at performing.
They might have exceptionaltalent. How do we develop that
talent to make sure that kidsare pursuing their dreams and
they're rising to their fullpotential. Hi. Thank you so much
(00:26):
for joining the falling forlearning podcast. We have this
podcast to help parents andcaregivers with having the
resources, strategies and toolsneeded to make sure that their
children are on track forlearning and to stay on track
for success. Our next guest,Albert Bramante is a talent
agent and performance coach whoare going to give us some
(00:48):
strategies and insights abouthow to help our kids on their
journey to greatness.
Albert Bramante (00:54):
Thank you for having
TD Flenaugh (00:56):
me on here. So Albert, we always have our
guests talk about the thing thatmade them fall in love with
learning. What was that thingfor you? For
Albert Bramante (01:04):
me, it was just a natural proclivity toward
reading and discovering newthings. As a child, I was an
avid reader. I still am, but Ialways I love to read. And for
me, that was my comfort, mysolace, my sanctuary was a
library, and so I just reallyenjoyed learning about new
things. I was always a curiouskid, asked a lot of questions,
(01:27):
was sometimes even chastised forbeing nosy. But I get just I'm
just curious. I bring that tocuriosity, and I think that's
what really helped me getthrough things. You know,
anybody my own life, is justlearning, you know, especially
loving to read. I love books.
Yeah, and being an authormyself, I just, I've always
loved books and still do. So forme, it's, I've always I fell in
(01:51):
love with learning, and I feellike, you know, Michael in life
is just people learning, and I'ma lifelong learner. And you
know, even being out of schoolfor so many years, I feel like
I'm always learning. And I thinkthat's a mindset that all of us
should be
TD Flenaugh (02:07):
having absolutely so could you tell us about what
kind of activities you weren'tin as a child? What's your
education background that ledyou to your career?
Albert Bramante (02:18):
Sure. Well, I was always involved. I mean,
when I was in, you know,elementary middle school, I was
a type of child, because I was,I'm the youngest of five, and my
half siblings are much olderthan I am, and so I kind of
essentially was the only child.
So I didn't really have thatmany peers to grow up with. And
so I was more the adult, adult.
(02:41):
I was hanging out with theadults table and the, you know,
sitting at the adults table, Ididn't have a hard time really
adjusting to other children, butI spent, I would say, a good
part of my junior high in highschool being very involved. You
know, different clubs, differentorganizations, including the
school newspaper, the dramaclub, the, you know, all these
(03:03):
different service organizations.
And even in college, you know,my undergraduate studies, I was
very much involved, you know, somany different organizations.
And for me, that was just soimportant, you know, I think
it's just to to be a part ofdifferent groups and communities
and so that's what really fueledme. I mean, with community, I
(03:24):
would say the biggest aspect ofmy education so
TD Flenaugh (03:30):
amazing. Okay, so tell us about, you know, the
education that you had or theexperience that led you to your
career as a talent agent andperformance coach,
Albert Bramante (03:42):
sure? Well, I worked several different hats,
and I when I was like 1516, Imade this declaration that I was
going to be a psychology major.
Okay? Because I was readingbooks in high school such as How
to Win Friends and InfluencePeople by Dale Carnegie, Seven
Habits of Highly EffectivePeople. So I really became just
curious about self improvementand self help, so I just really
(04:03):
wanted to study psychology formy undergraduate and bachelor's
degree. I took some classes intheater at that time. I was not
really intending to be anythingin the in the arts. I was really
intended to be a clinicalpsychologist and college
professor, you know, my mom wasa first grade teacher for 31
years. My dad, you know, was afootball coach. My oldest
(04:25):
brother was a football coach. SoI think that between the
coaching and teaching educationwas in my blood falling and full
throat. Then I did my master'sdegree in psychology with a
focus on consecration, marriageand family therapy and again,
still looking to be a psych,clinical psychologist. I didn't
(04:45):
get into a PhD program run away,so I had to work. And I had to,
kind of work, you know, go intosocial services. Now right
around this is right after Ireceived my master's degree.
Unfortunately. It was the sameyear of 911 and so, you know,
being that I'm New Jersey in NewJersey was very close to, you
know, New York City, and so,okay, some my contacts who were
(05:09):
part of the 911 were needed,needed help to volunteers, like
recruited a number of us, my,you know, myself, included a
bunch of actors and filmmakersand directors, and it kind of
brought my interest back frombeing in a drama club and being
being, you know, an actingclass. How much I enjoyed it. So
I was like, Okay, Link, tried athing as an actor. Now for me,
(05:30):
it wasn't so much being anactor, but I think what it
boiled down to was the theatercommunity and ethnic community.
I really felt seen as a person,and I really felt like I
belonged here, you know, in thiscommunity. So, you know, right
around this time, I also gothot, started filling one part of
my dream was I got hired toteach as an adjunct at the time
(05:53):
in the community college inpsychology. So I started doing
that, and I really loved it. Andbut then, you know the thing
about, well, what do I do as faras acting wise? I said, Well,
I'm not interested so much ofbeing an actor myself, but I
enjoy working with actors. Iwant to support actors as much
as possible. So then I thought,Well, why don't I represent
(06:15):
them? And so 2004 I started myfirst company, you know, from
home and managing actors. Andthen this is right around the
same time I decided I'm going togo back to my PhD. And in the
middle of my PhD studies, youknow, it's kind of launching the
talent business, as well asstill teaching part time. But
(06:36):
the one thing that kept comingup with self sabotage and, you
know, blocks, fear, success,imposter syndrome. And so I
decided I was gonna do mydoctoral dissertation on self
defeating, behavior performingartists, right? And so that was
like turning point where I wasable to bring both of my worlds
together, my love that thing,but also the psychology and the
(06:58):
mindset work that come withthat. So that's how I that
started. And then, you know,many years later, I decided to,
you know, write my, you know,publishing book, writing of the
script, which deals with selfdoubt and self sabotage, okay?
And working with the 1000s ofactors as well as students. That
was the one thing that came up alot was self sabotage and fear
(07:21):
of success and other blocks,like really getting your own
way, and how we can be,sometimes be our own worst
enemy.
TD Flenaugh (07:31):
Yeah. Can you give us like, one example of self
sabotage?
Albert Bramante (07:35):
Well, in my context, it would be like the
the actor, for example, who youknow, does shows up late to
appointments, the actor whodoesn't prepare fully, of the
actor who decides even to blowoff an appointment or an
audition, you know, just reallythings that are like, kind of
taking themselves out of therace, or the out of the
opportunity too fast withoutbecause it's a tough industry
(07:58):
already to break into,regardless, right? It's like,
now you're kind of like beingyour own worst enemy,
TD Flenaugh (08:03):
right? So you don't even have an opportunity.
They're not going to consideryou because you didn't show up,
you came really late, somethinglike that. Okay? And then what
happened? Like, what are somethings that happen in self
doubt? Or, how does that happen?
You explain more about that,sure?
Albert Bramante (08:21):
Well, what, what can happen there? What's
what out it's you start to getthat inner critic that pops in
there, that the I don't know ifI can do this. I know if I'm
good enough, I'm trained enough.
Oh my, I'm just little, all me.
And then it just starts to say,You know what, I'm not gonna
really do this. I'm not gonnapursue this, even though I
(08:41):
really want to deep down inside,I'm just not going to do it. And
therefore it just like we startshrinking inside, and then
therefore we just, we don'treally let, let our, let our
light shine through, in a sense,
TD Flenaugh (08:55):
okay, and so when we, you know, with our audience,
really supporting kids aseducators and caregivers. What
are some things that we could dofor kids as they're, you know,
sometimes they might be actingright? They may have, you know,
big roles that they're up for,but they may also have, like,
smaller roles, speeches,different things like that. What
(09:16):
are some things that we could doto help support them when some
of the self doubt or even selfsabotage is happening.
Albert Bramante (09:22):
Well, really to one thing you want to do is
build like, initiative, autonomyand really competence, and
that's what you're doing withchildren, and it's really
encouragement. Is very powerfulencouragement, and not being so
concerned as a parent with theoutcome, you know, more more of
like, enjoy praising theprocess. So, for example,
(09:45):
instead of, instead of, like,you know, even if the child
messes up or or exposes theirpractice, to keep reinforcing
the idea that they're workinghard for it, so you're you're
crazy, rather than the outcome.
So therefore you're teachingperseverance and the importance
of grit and hard work, andrather than, again, the outcome
(10:07):
like, it's not about winning,it's not about losing, it's not
about whether you're going toget the role or not. It's about
working hard. It's aboutputting, you know, giving it
your all and being okay withwhatever the outcome is not
being attached to the outcome,and this is even for adult
actors too, is to just do yourbest and not be so concerned
(10:30):
with the outcome.
TD Flenaugh (10:41):
The rewrite method and the rewrite method workbook
are your go to resource forhelping kids to learn to fall in
love with writing. It has thetips, tools, resources,
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(11:07):
of writing heat and into lovingto write. Get your book set
today youall right, I love that praising
the process and really focusingon the effort and detaching
(11:30):
yourselves from the outcome. Sothose are some great strategies,
some gems that will be veryhelpful for our audience
members. What are some things todo when the self doubt is coming
in? Because obviously you couldhelp coach them. But what are
(11:52):
some things that we could tellthem to say or do, to help them
when they're like on stage andthe self doubt is creeping up,
you know, in the in the moment,
Albert Bramante (12:04):
yeah, well, physiologically, take a deep
breath in. Deep breathing isvery powerful, calm, deep breath
in. And just even, like simplephrases, like, I got this, I got
this, you know, you say that toyourself, I got this. And you
move forward. And one of thethings that were were really
wired to pay attention to fear,and that's exactly a brain is
(12:25):
designed to help us survive. Soit's doing its job by sometimes
creating this tension in ourbody, because it's we're an
unfamiliar territory, we're anunfamiliar ground, an unknown
land. So again, it's gonna seekthat fear, but instead, like
saying, I got this, and you knowwhat, whether you're whether
(12:45):
you're giving a speech, whetheryou're giving a performance, the
idea here is to almost reframethat nerves that you're getting,
that maybe that uneasiness, thatqueasiness in your stomach is,
instead of saying, like, well,this means I'm nervous. No, it
means you're excited. Because ifyou look at the the emotion of
excitement and anxiety in thebody, physiologically, they're
(13:06):
very similar. State,interesting, okay, instead of
saying I'm fearful, I'm doing Imust be fearful. No, I'm doing
this because I'm excited. I
TD Flenaugh (13:16):
love that idea reframing that fear as
excitement and really thinkingabout, you know, things that you
could do, such as breathingright, which we hear a lot, but
helping students, kids practicethat in the moment, practice
that, and then actually, whenthey're in the moment, you know,
they could apply it and actuallyuse it. And it could be
(13:37):
something to help them moveforward. That's really great,
great ideas that we need tothink about and really implement
with our students and ourchildren as they are getting out
of their comfort zone. Becausethat is what performing is. Out
of the comfort zone. It isunknown territory, often when,
even if you've done somethingbefore, but within the the new
(14:00):
performance is a new audience,and it is a new new territory,
like you said, so reframingthose ideas and really able to
move forward, because we wantour kids to reach their full
potential, but for them to thinkabout fear in a more objective
way and then reframe their fearAs excitement. Really, really,
think those are very helpfulstrategies that you're sharing
(14:24):
with us, absolutely. So can youtell us about your book and how
it relates to your coaching? Andsure you're
Albert Bramante (14:33):
it's, I have a different backed up by research
and personal, you know, storiesand experience. So it's based,
it's follows, the foundation ofmy doctoral dissertation. The
outline, I talk about selfesteem. You know, my first part
of the book is self esteem, andI talk about the consequences,
the extremes of self esteem,when it's too low, how it's a
(14:54):
problem. Sometimes being toohigh can be what I call toxic
high self esteem, or, like, youknow, a little bit. Pomp, you
know, pompousness, grandiosityand all that, and how that can
lead to self sabotage too,because then we're not open to
criticism, and that we're notreally, you know, we're not
really open to change. And thenpart two, I talk about a concept
known as self efficacy, which Ifeel is so important for
(15:16):
children and education. And selfefficacy is really your your
belief or your competence in acertain task or domain. And if
you're performing in any type ofway, you really have to have a
high degree of self efficacy inyour in your acting ability,
performing ability, speakingability, your athletic ability,
whatever it is you're performingas so. And then there's another
(15:37):
part where I talk aboutpersonality, particularly a five
factor model, which is, youknow, openness,
conscientiousness, extroversion,agreeableness and eroticism, and
how all those play into them,how this relates to self
sabotage is usually those thatare high in eroticism, which is
really referred to how prone youare to anxiety and and and how
(15:57):
easily your face, like peoplethat are high in neuroticism
tend to be very easily upset ortriggered or angered, whatever
it is, and an emotional extreme.
And you couple that with low andconscientiousness, which is
discipline and focus. And that'sa perfect recipe for self
sabotage, I see. And then thelast part of the book, but the
final part is on fear successand a couple of different things
(16:20):
that talk about relationships.
You know, sometimes when you'resuccessful, relationships may
change, because your life isgoing to change. And then
there's another chapter I talkabout money, your relationship
with money, okay, and how thataffects you. And it says that
every part of the chapter,there's some helpful strategies
(16:42):
in there. So while the book isreally geared towards actors,
you know, for performingartists, there's a lot of stuff
that's in there that really,anybody can get, can gain
something from, you know, whodeals with self doubt and self
you know, and sometimes thatimposter syndrome and you know,
and that's everybody, prettymuch, you know, I'm really
(17:02):
fundamentally,
TD Flenaugh (17:03):
wow. Okay, so tell us the title of your book one
more time.
Albert Bramante (17:06):
Sure, it's rise above the script, confronting
self doubt and mastering selfsabotage for performing art,
TD Flenaugh (17:13):
wonderful. Okay, and we're and we are going to
have a link to that in the shownotes, right? Okay, all right.
And if people want to reach outto you where they're going to
go,
Albert Bramante (17:24):
Sure, you can go to my you can go to my agency
website, vermonte artists.comand feel free to reach out to me
there, especially if anyquestions about acting, or, you
know, if you have questionsabout performance, I'd be happy
to reach out to you there. Youcan also find me on socialism,
on LinkedIn and Instagram, andyou know, you can feel free to
send me a direct message, andI'd be happy to chat with
TD Flenaugh (17:47):
you, great. So getting back to your work, what
are some things that you noticethat people really get wrong?
They do things that are reallyset them up for it doesn't set
them up for fail. I mean, itkind of sets them up for
failure. Besides, like, selfsabotage, what are other things
that they do?
Albert Bramante (18:06):
A big one is perfectionism, expecting every
or expecting everything to beperfect. And one of the
statements is related to that,is, is I really feel like being
not ready is a lie. Like, whenyou tell yourself you're not
ready, it's really you'redeceiving yourself. So I often
say not ready is a lie. And thereason why that happens is
because there's no such thing asa perfect human being. We're
(18:28):
gonna make mistakes all thetime. And I think when we're
waiting to do something becausewe want it to be perfect. That
you know, not ready to do thisyet. I need more training. I
need not ready to implement thatbecause I need more experience.
And I think that if you keep inthat pattern, it's like a never
ending loop, you'll never beready, right? And so the
(18:48):
important thing is to do it, tojust do it, take action, and
even if, if it doesn't go thedirection you plan, or it
doesn't land the way you wantit, to consider that a learning
opportunity. So there's no suchthing as failure, only feedback.
So you're failing forward, in asense. So I think that's
important, is to learn that noteverything, everything that that
(19:10):
doesn't work out, is a badbecause to be upset about or to
dwell on, it's a learningexperience. It gives you good
feedback. It's like now, now youknow what to do differently. So
that's very important,
TD Flenaugh (19:23):
that's really good.
So being not ready is a lie,that you really are ready, but
you're worried about it notbeing perfect and taking the
action is going to lead you,give you some experience, going
to give you some learning, goingto give you feedback. So failure
actually reframe it as feedback,right? Okay, yes, I really love
(19:45):
that. Okay, all right. And whatgets people what do you think as
an like, with actors, like, whathas been the thing that really
propels people forward whenthey're thinking about their
performance?
Albert Bramante (20:00):
Are growing.
What really propels them forwardis mindset and a growth mindset,
and that's all about, likelooking as opportunities for
growth. In a sense, that'swhat's important is, you know,
just learning to grow, moveforward. That's the one thing I
would say, also just again beingalso around a good support
(20:21):
system too. You know, you wantto be around a good network, and
network that elevate you, thatwill support you, rather than
tear you down. And that's why Ibelieve proximity is power, you
know, and I'll borrow that fromlike Tony Robbins and, you know,
yes, Jim Rohn, and thatproximity is power, and I think
that is so important. So youwant to have a good network
(20:44):
that's going to support you, andyou want to be around other
parents that are going to helpelevate you and support you, and
be around other children youknow your children, be around
other children that will inspirethem and to lift them up so and
there's always expression thatone of my mentors that said, you
want to be around people thatwill celebrate you and not
tolerate
TD Flenaugh (21:01):
you. Nice, celebrate you and not tolerate
you. So many gems. Thank you somuch. Albert Monte for just
bringing all of this togetherfor us and really thinking about
that. What are if someone wantsto be an actor or an actress as
an adult, what are some thingsthat they could do for their
kids now to help them move inthat direction?
Albert Bramante (21:24):
Well, I would say, first, get them in some
theater classes, whether it's intheir school or in their
community. Let them do somecommunity theater. Get the
experience of being on stage,working with the script, working
with practicing auditioning. Andthen just get them like, you
know, get them involved in someacting classes from different
acting schools. And that's thebiggest thing is, like learning
(21:46):
to network, and they can startmeeting other actors and other
theater professionals, and theycan start just building from
there. And then, you know, onceyou're establishing you would
need professional headshots,which are you would get that
from a photographer who doesacting headshots on portrait
shots or not glamor shots, butactual headshots. And so you
would need that. And with thattraining, you would then start,
(22:07):
you know, putting yourselfonline. There's different
websites for actors, like actorsaccess and casting networks,
which I can certainly get, youknow, if anything reaches out to
me, I can certainly guide them.
But that would be the nextsteps. Is to just put yourself
out there. But the main thing toreally know is that this is a
career. This is not a overnightsensation. So you we may have
hear some stories of peoplehaving a big break, but
(22:29):
sometimes what the reality is,it took them 15 years to get
that break right. So it's a lotof work. It's a great, rewarding
profession. Somebody who wantsto do this great but do
understand that this is acareer. This is a, not it. This
is a, you know, not a sprint, ajourney. So it's going to take
time and and a long time, andfor, especially for younger
(22:50):
actors, because I work, youknow, one live with adults, but
even those that are graduatingfrom college and, you know,
moving to New York or they'regoing to help Los Angeles or
even Atlanta. The importantthing to know is that you need
almost a 10 or 15 or 20 yearplan if you're if this is what
you want to do when. And I'massuming it is, but it's not
going to be an overnightsuccess. It's not going to be an
(23:12):
overnight sensation. It's goingto take time, but it's very
rewarding, because, again, mostof the actors I know that I work
with, don't do it for the thing.
Don't do it for the externalrewards. More about the
internal, like the intrinsic ofbeing able to tell a story and
be able to bring a character
TD Flenaugh (23:29):
to life, right?
Okay, well, that's interesting.
I you know, I haven't researchedit very much, but just to hear
that 10 to 20 year plan, it's acareer, I think is really good
advice. I think a lot of peopledo think, you know, you get just
discovered, and you're on thathit show or movie and it's like
you're doing it, yeah, where thereality is doesn't really match
(23:54):
that ideal. Okay, yeah, that'sgood. That's good to know. Okay,
well, are there any you knowfinal takeaways that you want to
give to our audience? Well,
Albert Bramante (24:03):
I'm glad that you know this podcast exists,
and thank you for putting ittogether, because I feel like
it's so important for thechildren. I mean, I know it's
cliche, but children of thefuture, and I think that we
really need to be setting thefoundation so that I don't have
to be coaching that much whenI'm when they're an adult,
because they already have thetools to be able to handle, you
(24:25):
know, challenges and diversityand be able to push through
them. So we need to start at anearly age, because technically,
if you really think about weshould have all the resources we
need to succeed by the timewe're adults. And sometimes, you
know, there may be, you know,benefit will have the best
childhood, or we're dealing withour own trauma. Sometimes those
resources can be or that wisdomcan be blocked or impeded. So
(24:48):
it's important to kind of workthrough that and to and that's
where a coach can come in tokind of tap, help you tap into
that your own inner greatness.
TD Flenaugh (24:56):
Okay, all right.
And so again. Look out forAlbert Bramante on his social
media and his website again onemore time,
Albert Bramante (25:07):
and that's Bramante artists.com Okay,
TD Flenaugh (25:10):
and we appreciate you so much for coming on to our
show dropping so many gems abouthow to bolster children through
their confidence and reallycoach them into the next level
of performance. Thank you somuch again. And for parents and
our educators out there, pleasedo something today that is going
(25:32):
to give the children you serve acompetitive advantage. Thanks
again. Thank you. Thanks againfor supporting the falling for
learning podcast, new episodesgo live every Saturday at 5pm
you can watch us on youtube.com,at falling for learning, or
listen on all major podcastplatforms such as Apple, Google,
(25:57):
Audible, Spotify and much morefor more resources, visit
falling in love withlearning.com we really
appreciate you. Have a wonderfulweek.
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