Ep 24 My Journey to Recovery From Addiction's Impact

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Have you ever felt like the weight of a loved one's addiction was too much to bear? Join us as we sit down with series host Patrick Doyle, a family addiction coach who shares his remarkable journey through the emotional chaos of his child's addiction and his subsequent path to personal recovery. Patrick's heartfelt story takes us from guilt and helplessness to the transformative realization that genuine support means empowering his child rather than trying to fix them. Through his candid reflections, you'll learn the power of shifting from control to empowerment and how unconditional love became his guiding light.

In this engaging episode, Patrick opens up about the crucial moments that altered the course of his family's recovery and inspired him to guide others facing similar battles. His experiences led him to become a life coach, focusing on advanced training to help families build more robust, supportive relationships. Patrick emphasizes that recovery is not a one-size-fits-all journey but a personal path shaped by persistence and hope. By listening to his story, you'll discover the importance of community, resilience, and the remarkable strength within families when they embrace recovery together.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
I wasn't sure I'd survive my child's addiction.
It shattered my heart, testedmy strength and pushed me to the
edge.
But in that darkness I foundsomething unexpected my own
recovery.
Have you ever been so upsetabout another substance use that
it started to take over yourlife?
Hi, I'm Patrick Doyle, thefamily addiction coach, and this

(00:26):
is my recovery journey Not justmy child's recovery, but my own
path to healing.
My journey inspired me to helpother families find their way.
My core values are persistence.
There's no one-size-fits-allrecovery.
This is a hard road and love isunconditional.

(00:51):
When my child first startedshowing problems with substances
during high school, I wasshocked and didn't want to
believe it.
It felt unreal, like a baddream.
This couldn't happen to myfamily.
I felt guilty and helpless andafraid of what would happen.
I blamed myself.

(01:11):
I must have done somethingwrong.
During this bleak time, whathelped was to remind myself that
I would never stop loving them.
My love was unconditional.
Stop loving them.
My love was unconditional.
When my confidence was shaky,with few answers to many
questions, this grounded me.

(01:31):
With so much confusion,standing with my child was, at
times, the only thing I was sureof.
This helped me to let go ofnagging doubts and to find hope
for a solution.
There was a turning point whenI realized that my child's
recovery couldn't be forced, butit had to be their own choice.

(01:54):
This realization helped meshift from control to support,
focusing on empowering my childrather than fixing them,
focusing on empowering my childrather than fixing them.
I got my child a therapist whofocused on their confidentiality
, but I believe familyinvolvement is crucial for

(02:15):
lasting recovery.
Al-anon Family Groups hashelped millions and it's worth
checking out.
For me, al-anon helped butdidn't fully resonate.
I didn't accept the binary ofeither helping my child or
helping only myself.
There had to be a way to doboth and I was determined to

(02:35):
find it.
I was not interested indetaching with love, kicking
them out, letting them hit rockbottom or forcing them into
treatment.
I wasn't codependent.
I was a dad willing to doeverything possible to help my
child.
That's when I realized I had tofind my own recovery path.

(02:58):
I found a therapist who made mefeel understood and accepted,
without judgment.
I didn't need fixing as Iwasn't broken.
I needed empowerment andsupport.
It was painful when my childstruggled.
It's hard to see someone youlove make mistakes.

(03:20):
When I did all I could.
I needed to focus on myself andmy quality of life.
That was another turning pointin my recovery.
Knowing I could becomeoverwhelmed with negativity, I
had to shift my focus to mychild's positive behaviors.
My moods improved fromdiscouragement to becoming

(03:44):
inspired by theiraccomplishments.
Against all the odds, I praisedthem at every opportunity and
also praised myself.
In college, my child enteredcompetitions based on creativity
and won the highest award, notonce, but twice.
This allowed them to presenttheir work in a prestigious

(04:09):
industry event.
To succeed by pushing beyondtheir comfort zone was
inspirational to me.
Their comfort zone wasinspirational to me.
Many will tell you not topraise, as it will hurt them by
making them lazy.
That's ridiculous.
When their hope was shaky, theyneeded me to point out their

(04:30):
strengths.
Witnessing their strength andresilience helped me stay strong
.
I am persistent.
I will never give up.
I've been more open about myrecovery journey and my child's
struggles.
I've received positive supportand encouragement, and I feel
less isolated and more sociallyconnected.

(04:53):
It starts with finding someoneyou can trust to share your
story with.
Recovery can be challenging,but it's better not to travel
alone.
The key lessons I've learnedare the power of unconditional
love.
Recovery is notone-size-fits-all.

(05:13):
The need to give myself graceand never give up.
My experiences led me to becomea life coach, helping other
families navigate similarjourneys.
There's not enough support forfamilies with addiction.
I've pursued advanced trainingto help families learn skills to

(05:37):
support, influence and improvetheir relationships.
As a result, every family hasgotten better because they've
learned to support their lovedone while also taking care of
themselves.
I've become a very optimisticand hopeful person as a result

(05:59):
of my recovery.
I want you to know thatrecovery is possible for both
you and for your loved ones.
I encourage you to contact menow at familyaddictioncoachcom.
You are not alone in yourjourney.
Thousands of families have usedmy guidance to recover from

(06:20):
addiction.
In my coaching, they learncommunication and other skills
to solve problems and improvetheir quality of life.