Glee on the Rocks: 5x13 - "New Directions" All Over Again

The end of an era—or at least it should have been. In Glee 5×13, “New Directions,” the Glee Club is officially over, Sue has won, and McKinley’s choir room gets packed up for good this time. But instead of a graceful farewell to the kids we know and love, we get an episode written like a series finale… even though the show still had another season and a half to go. Oh, Glee.

Join us (and we mean all of us) as we unpack the chaos: Holly Holiday roller-skating the Animal Husbandry Club into a bubble party, Tina incurring yet another head injury, Quinn and Puck getting back together for the thrill of it all, and Brittany gifting Santana “the lesbian of flowers." Meanwhile, Rachel and Santana feud, make up, and feud again—all while the writers bend over backwards to absolve Rachel of five seasons’ worth of sins. Not in our house.

We talk “Don’t Stop Believin’” attempt number 47, the farewell montage that really should have ended the series, and Sue’s shockingly heartfelt declaration of love (respect? enemies to lovers endgame??) for Will Schuester. It’s messy, sentimental, and pure Glee.

Maybe the episode wasn’t a delight—but we were. But we're biased.

xoxo
GotR

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
The da da ISM of this episode ofGlee is just obscene.
You're listening to Glee on the Rocks.

(00:21):
Welcome back to Glee on the Rocks, a Phantom on the Rocks
podcast. I am Emily.
I am MAF. I'm Mandy.
I'm Bee. I'm Adriana and I'm Allison.
And this is absolutely everyone on the podcast all at once
together. Everyone that's ever been
associated with the podcast. Like the Brain Bunch?

(00:46):
Everyone, everywhere, all at once.
Well, because isn't this? Isn't this the Glee finale?
This is. This is the the Glee finale over
done. They filmed it, not us, didn't
they? And then they kept going for
reasons that we'll discuss. I guess at some point they
should have stopped. This will be so many, not even.

(01:11):
Well, actually, yes, I was like,well, yes, because I remember, I
remember being a wee little highschool child being like, Oh my
God, Glee is my everything. And then at the end of season 4,
they got a two season renewal. So they knew they were so
actually, that's the point against them.
They knew that they were going to keep going.

(01:31):
And then they still shot this. They still wrote and shot this
in the way that they did. Are you saying that they're bad
at plotting their show? I said no such thing.
I'll say if you deferred that. I'll say it, they're bad at
plotting their show. I'm not saying it's bad, I'm
saying it could have been better.

(01:55):
I'm saying it's bad. I'm saying they also knew they
still had at least another season and they decided to write
this in the way that they did. They did.
There's 20 episodes in season 5 and this is number 13.
This is the one. Where I don't remember anything
that happens after this, I didn't.

(02:16):
Remember. Anything that happened in this
except. One thing you remember after
this blame is turned on by birds.
I'll never forget that one. OK.
Before we get into it, this is season 5 episode 13 New
Directions because they finally had to title an episode New
Directions. The rundown is help sometimes

(02:39):
comes from the most unlikely of sources.
Sure, who wrote that? Hulu wrote that.
Thank you, Hulu. Somebody who?
Wrote that. Hulu should get like sub like
notification, not sub notifications.
That's the wrong word. Should.
Be subtweet Hulu because we can do that.
No, I was just going to say you should add them to like the
listing. So it's like, hi, I'm Emily, hi,

(03:01):
I'm Mev. We also like Hi also Hulu as
part of this podcast Angry. Wiki I'm.
Hulu. If Hulu wants to like fund this
podcast, they are more than welcome to.
We will. We can have a little Hulu icon
at the bottom if they would liketo be patrons of our little

(03:23):
shindig. That is fine by me.
We can subscribe to Corporate Overlords for.
Hulu is already doing excellent work in my current fandom, so I
am all on board with our Hulu overlords.
I'm just saying that the cinematic universe comes full
circle because Chimney Han is infact played by Terri Schuster's
obstetrician. Yeah.

(03:45):
I need to leave. So it's horrifying.
Everything comes back to Ryan Murphy, for better, for worse.
It really does. Yeah, it's bad, and so is this
episode. And so is this episode.
Frankly, I didn't think it was that bad.
I the end, the end got me misty eyed.

(04:06):
It did it. Got you.
It got me. It was supposed to get me.
It was attempting to reward me for having suffered 5 1/2
seasons of this and it it didn'tfeel rewarding, but I can
appreciate the effort. So like we said in the part that
we didn't record, this is a continuation of five 12100,

(04:30):
which is the 100th episode of Glee.
This is now the 100th and a halfepisode of Glee, and it's just a
straight continuation of the last episode where the Glee club
has been cancelled. Sue has won, Glee is over.
They are cleaning out the choir room.
And now we are dealing with the fallout of that in this episode

(04:53):
and, like, really wrapping it up.
We are wrapping up the Glee club.
We're wrapping up some storylines, honestly.
And it really feels like we're wrapping up the show, but we're
not. Yeah.
It would have been. Satisfying if that had been the
wrap up for some of the OG characters.
Yeah, it would. Have and if you stopped watching

(05:16):
at season 5, it was I didn't seeseason 6.
If you didn't, if you did not watch season 6, then this is the
last time we see puck. This is the last time we see
Quinn. This is realistically the last
time we see Becky. I think there's.

(05:38):
It's the last time we see Marley, isn't it?
This is. Actually this is.
Actually. Definitively the last time we
see Marley and the last time we see any of the newbies actually,
except Kitty and Unique. Oh, OK, so Jake and Jake and
Ryder are both out, Yeah. Oh, it says it's the last

(05:59):
episode of April Rhodes and Holly Holiday too.
Oh, that would make sense too. I was thinking of the adults
that come back later this season, but the two of them
don't come back at all. Which?
It's a lot. There's a lot of like, this is
the, this is what they're doing with the rest of their lives.
This is how they're continuing on at the end of the show.

(06:21):
Like there's a montage at the end of like the video that they
record for Will Shuster. And it's like this is what we're
doing 10 years from now as it's the end and yet it's not.
And they knew it wasn't. Yeah.
Like. We said, I think that's the
biggest point is that it's not like they were like, aha, we're

(06:41):
done, we've finished it. And then the studio came back
and went, JK, do another one. It's like, no, you planned that
question mark. You were renewed for an extra
season and a half. Like what?
What What are you doing? Look at your life.
Look at your choices. Yeah.
And I, I also think it's interesting because I, I don't

(07:06):
know if this is a theory or if this was like true, like we knew
this back then and I just forgotabout it 'cause it's been so
long where it just seems like they wrote this not really
knowing what season 6 was going to look like at all.
Because they knew that the back half of season 5 was going to
be, you know, a little bit of a time jump how everybody who is

(07:29):
in New York is doing in New York.
And then like Funny Girl opening, but I don't think they
knew what Season 6 was going to be.
And so that's why we get these farewells for all of these other
characters that they then bring back anyway.
Yeah, I think we didn't or they didn't know all New York, some

(07:50):
Ohio know like, yeah, they had no idea if they were going to
keep a split narrative or not. And.
I think they must have known thesplit narrative wasn't working
because I think the plan originally, well, I think
originally they were going to dothe split narrative because they
did that for most of season 4 and it didn't.

(08:12):
Work. Does anyone remember the
timeline like the the non show timeline, like the behind the
scenes timeline of when they stopped talking about a spin off
because there was always chatter.
And now my brain has completely lost the like upfront
conversations about if there wasgoing to be a New York spinoff

(08:34):
because that was always behind the scenes in in interviews and
in the upfronts, like the fox upfronts of OH.
Maybe it's going to be there's arenewal, but actually we're
going to keep Glee one point O in Ohio and there's going to be
an all New York spinoff. And then it's like they went and

(08:55):
mushed it together into back endof five and season 6, but I
don't remember the timing anymore.
I don't either, but I'm also nowreally curious to be a family on
the wall to kind of go, OK, makes sense why they would want
to have a New York spin off. They had a lot of those names
for very household names at thatpoint.

(09:18):
So it's like, OK, we don't want to let that go, but we can't
keep it going because the whole name of this show is about being
like in high school Glee club. OK, great, so then let's keep it
and then run them off. I don't remember the timeline,
but it makes sense. But I want to be the fly on the
wall. It's like when they were like
pitching it and it got turned down.

(09:41):
That's why they. Switched everything together.
Don't forget Kurt. Was going to Russia at one
point. Right.
Kurt was going to Russia. Russia.
My gut says it was like end of season 4 when it was like most
likely to going to happen and then it feels right.
I looked this up because I was like, is what y'all are saying

(10:02):
what I think you're saying? So they got renewed for 5:00 and
6:00 at the same time. So I wonder if that was like, we
can't give you 2 shows, but we'll give you 2 more seasons
like that's that's it. So I wonder if it was like that
transition point between like season 4, season 5 where it's
like maybe in season 4 they weretalking more about like, OK,
maybe we'll have a spin off. And then when they got the two

(10:23):
season renewal, they were like no spin off for sure.
Especially because one it's season 6 is half a season barely
and and season 5 was short anyway and then the ratings were
not great. Yeah, from what I remember,
season 5 was short because they did take a little bit of a
filming break due to Corey's passing where they were like

(10:48):
already scheduled to like they were already like the locations
and everything were already doneand like set and scheduled for
the 1st 2 episodes, The Beatles tributes.
But then they took a little break in filming, but like to
film the quarterback and then and so because they had more

(11:10):
time, that's why the episode count was shorter.
But I don't know that they had like a set count for what season
6 was going to be. And then I think probably when
the when the ratings dipped evenlower than they had previously,
they're like, yeah, you're getting 13 episodes and and like

(11:32):
a bag of pennies is your budget.Because like not to relitigate a
10 year old argument, but if youdo think about it, if you split
the show into to Glee OG and then New York, you build sets in
New York. Like you take Glee New York to
New York and you don't try to have shit sets on the back lot

(11:54):
in Fox because the New York section on the Fox back lot, it
just looks like you can tell you're filming in LA.
And if you take the whole show to New York to film, you at
least get a real New York vibe because you can always tell when

(12:14):
they took like Leah and Chris toNew York for like a week to
fight outside and do that. Because they actually did
outdoor shots. And you'll see this more in the
next episode, New New York. Because.
We because we have like fan pictures of them shooting on

(12:36):
location. But I think The thing is too,
that if you were then to have two shows and one of them is in
New York, even if they're, I also got into into this when I
was watching Suits and they did A and then they did one episode
where they very clearly shot in Chicago.
And I was like, yeah, because this conversation could be
happening in an elevator. And instead you're doing this on

(12:56):
the Riverwalk to show me that you're ancient.
Like, OK, but they're I. But we paid.
Those fees, we're kind of fucking.
Using they're like here's the fucking and they never anyway.
And so and you can tell, but youcan also tell what they decided
to prioritize within the the NewYork part of the show because

(13:20):
they stopped using like the two Niata sets that they had after
the half point of season 4. Yeah, like we're not really in
the dance classroom and we're not really in like the the OK.
Well, she stopped going to school.
So she, well, she stops going toschool, but Kurt doesn't.
Like, we have one or two scenes in the dance classroom still to

(13:47):
come. And they also minimize the
amount of Lima sets that we had after that certain point as
well. Like we barely ever saw
breadsticks anymore. We don't really see anybody's
like houses anymore, even thoughwe used to have a lot of house
scenes. RIP Blades Bedroom.

(14:11):
RIP Like the the Hummel Hudson house.
Oh yeah, like that interior Hertz, like entire basement
bedroom scenario. Boudoir.
The boudoir. Those are sets are expensive.
They had what'd you say? They had a bag of pennies.
They had a bag of pennies and a dream.
I had a bag of pennies and a dream.

(14:33):
Let's talk about the plot of this episode.
I'm sorry, is there plot of thisepisode?
Because it opens with our two just drunken.
Drunken ants. Drunken ants they are just, they
fuck Mary, they're playing fuck Mary Kale in the fucking like,

(14:54):
loud loud. Will Schuster, Mr. Figgins, Brad
the Piano Player. That's easy.
I bang Will Schuster marry Figgins and push Brad the piano
player off a Cliff? I just, I love them so much but
I don't understand why they're still here.
Why did they both want to kill Brad?

(15:14):
That was that was the worst part.
Like of the choices, why are they both killing Brad?
You marry Brad. Yeah, he has.
Consistent he's. Consistent.
Talented. He's snarky, he's always
prepared. Knows every song on the planet.
All of the gossip, I think. It's for me, it's the difference

(15:37):
between Holly wanting to fuck Will Shuster once and April
Rhodes wanting to fuck him well into her 60s.
And I just like ladies, the ladies.
I think there are better optionsout there for you.
I do. I believe that there are better
options out there for you. Stay strong.
Like, even if you drive up a little bit of North Alima, you

(15:57):
can find like another city in Ohio, I promise.
But you know what? For all the shit talking that
we're about to do about Will Schuster, we forget that a
parent. Should be extensive.
I'm so sorry to interrupt. You.
No, you're. Correct.
Need to emphasize that that should be extensive.
Yes, thank you. Please continue.

(16:18):
We somehow we've missed that there is now a third drunk Ant
in this little threesome. Sylvester, Light of my.
Life Sylvester just decides thatshe is bestie friends 5 ever
with Holly Holiday. I did like that part the the
little one. So I forgot I was watching this

(16:38):
back and I like, I forgot that they actually do get along in
like the when Holly Holiday first comes on in season 2 and
now they're apparently auditioning for The Amazing Race
together. Naturally.
And yeah, I, I, I sure. I have no words.

(17:00):
Sure. Like sure.
OK, OK. I kind of assume it's because
Gwyneth Paltrow was with the oneof the creators that it's like
she's not gonna get shit talked to by Sue the entire time.
Well, that and like she's friendly with them and she OK
Sue Eva. OK, so the previous episode

(17:23):
ended with our drunken ants being like we're drinking.
But these people like shoe needsour help.
We need to try to get the Glee club back for him.
So that's why we start the episode with them wanting to
help. And so they're in the staff
lounge basically honeypotting their way so that they can like

(17:44):
talk sweet talk soup into getting the Glee club back.
And she's like, and don't forget, Miss April Rhodes is
pouring what I'm pretty sure is a is a cancer giving amount of
Splenda onto a melon for I honestly, it's just, it's just
business. Just something to do with her
hands. When it should be salt, you

(18:06):
should put salt on a melon, not sugar.
I don't know. I there were packets, there were
packets of powder that she was pouring on a melon.
Just the the the the da da ISM of this episode of Glee is just
obscene. Yeah.
I don't understand, I don't understand.

(18:28):
Because they're going to, they're, they're going to
shoehorn music into the other clubs to try to like, I guess
music, keep music alive in the school for a week to get this
episode in. Like really so that the rest of
the kids can like still have an outlet even though they have no

(18:49):
other interests or talent, even though they all already do.
Like if like like Jake is a dancer, put him in the Cheerios
writers already a football player unique.
It has her like fashion stuff that she's into.
There's there's a. Drama Club.

(19:10):
There's a drama club at the school and she'd probably serve
better there than at any other club or even in the Glee club.
And then Marley is like a songwriter.
Put her in a creative writing club.
If they have, if they have an animal husbandry club, they

(19:31):
definitely have a creative writing club.
I said what I said. They have an animal husbandry
club that all of the Glee club is part of.
I I did have a logistics question about all of this.
Like just to the show in general, that graduating class
was so small. How do they have enough students
to have? All of them.
There were like 15 of. Them tiny graduating class they

(19:54):
did. This at the last graduation
team. I will OK.
This is also a thing with like how big is the school versus how
many kids graduate? I'm saying there's a, there's a,
there's a thing we talk about inhigher Ed about the retention
rate and the four year and the six year retention rate.
I'm saying it looks like the Glee kids are the only ones at

(20:17):
that school who are graduating. So and the band kids the Glee
club. If Glee club is single handedly
holding up McKinley High's four year graduation rate Glee club
and the Cheerios and Principal Sue has done wrong, she has done
wrong. Let's let's let's not just give
her all the blame though fans was probably not doing as good

(20:39):
as she was. Figgins was doing terribly.
But you know, if the only two clubs that were holding up your
four year graduation rate are like, you gave away the Cheerios
to Coach Ross and then you killed the Glee club like girly
pop. What are what what what are you
doing? I personally think that they
recommend shoehorning music intoevery single club so that Sue

(21:02):
Sylvester can confess her undying love for Will Schuster.
That's my TV. Which she continues to do all
episode long. Like just didn't find a way to
include him. Like that's my OT Sue.
She really does say that actually.
And I was like, wow, she does like the amount of love.
It's more one rare pair. It is your one rare pair.

(21:25):
This is true Sue throughout thiswhole episode is like, I know I
had to do this for reasons, but Will Shuster, I love you.
So here you go. It was, it was a very odd thing
to watch. It really was how?
Where does it go from here 'cause it goes from them being
like, OK, that's. Well, OK, we go to Tina.

(21:47):
It goes to Tina being rejected from Ohio State.
From Ohio State. OK.
Oh, so Ohio State as a backup school, kill yourself.
That's actually like a massive school with a lot of programs.
It's really hard to get into. Yeah.
Like maybe she should have been applying sooner?
Like it sounds like none of these kids were applying to
college on the correct timeline.No, absolutely not.

(22:09):
She's wait listed for Brown. We got some new lore drop was
that she is adopted, which is never mentioned in the entirety
of the show because it was a dropped storyline from earlier
in the series. It's in the the Wikipedia like
fax and whatever that the idea of Tina being adopted, hence the

(22:32):
Cohen Chang is dropped. It's it's meant to be in there
as like a through line that she's adopted, but it's just
not. I was today years old.
I just assumed that it was a thing that they had like talked
about and I just forgot. No, it's fandom known because

(22:52):
we've all been in the trenches for 90 years.
It's not in the show. It was.
It's not Canon if it's about show.
It's not Canon if it's in an interview, assholes.
It's not. You have to put it in the show.
But it's Glee. The wiki isn't Canon.
You have to. Wiki's not Canon, you have to
put it. In the but it's Glee.
But it's Glee, so the audience is well into Season 5 when

(23:16):
you're like, oh, she's adopted. Not that it matters other than
like, editing counts. If you edit it out of the show
and then drop it in 60 years in you're like oh oh fuck.
Which is why all of a sudden herapplying to like a Jewish
school. You're like, is this racist?
Oh, she's adopt like I hate. This show.

(23:38):
Well I mean also not to be a cynic, but like, that's not
really how adoption typically works.
Like they let you keep your birth last name hyphenated.
That's literally never happened before.
Yeah, in the history of adoption.
I'm sorry. That's just not how that shit
goes. Are.
You saying that Ryan Murphy doesn't like research the
things? Another thing that they never
even fucking bothered to Google before they wrote it into their
show. Oh, it gets it gets more absurd

(24:01):
because we move from got rejected from Ohio State, but
wait listed for Brown, Tina Cohen, Chang getting like hit
over the head with a trophy. Yes, cause 'cause.
Like giving this girl brain injuries.
The fun. The amount of like trauma,

(24:22):
dreams this girl has had. Allison, She's had more coma
dreams than 911. That's not that's not
comforting, actually. How many brain cells has Tina
Cohen, Shane? All of them lost.
Too many. Yeah, you know, so service of
what? Like it's always truly about

(24:43):
other. People's dreams and shit too if.
They if they had continued the friends homage through the rest
of the episode and like processed some like separation
trauma or whatever, then like cool, amazing, sounds great.
It's the puppet episode. It's the you know, it's the body
swap episode. Fantastic.
But it ends like 2 minutes laterand it's just to give Tina the

(25:06):
the Rachel haircut. It's just to give Lea Michele a
bad spray tan. And it's just to watch curtain
Blaine make out. It's nothing.
It's nothing naked. It's Blaine, it's puffy hair.
It's the lamp shade that Sam is always naked.
And that Blaine show is ableist the way that that the show is

(25:28):
ableist because but arty like rolls in and he's like 6 flights
of stairs is no joke at this place should have an elevator
and someone's like it does. And he's like now you tell me.
And then also lamp shading A white woman spray tanning
herself into a different race in2014.
Yeah. Ariana Grande, you will not be

(25:51):
spared. No.
Just this whole that was it. It was 2 seconds and it just
like I wanted it. Oh give me something like I love
the dadaism of it all, I love the absurdity of it all, but it
just. I was left unsatisfied, frankly.

(26:11):
Because it doesn't even tie intoher later concerns that that she
has no reason to move to New York.
She has no plan. She has no nothing.
The dream doesn't. It doesn't highlight that she
has no plan because she has a job in the dream.
She's working at what they call it spotlight in the dream.
But like, people move to New York without a plan all the

(26:32):
time. Like so fucking what?
Your problem should be that you have no money.
Will she wakes up? She wakes up from the dream and
she's like, oh, being in New York is going to be so great
because it's a fantasy. It's a fantasy.
I hurt. Elaine are dressed the same and
and Blaine has better hair. And I do love that, you know,

(26:53):
because Tina comes in before shegets hit to talk to everyone
about, you know, the trophies packing up.
And she's like, you know, Curtain blade have news.
And Sam's like, you're adopting Russian twin babies.
And it's like, where did that come from?
I don't understand. What do you think?
I don't think that was a little like thing to Kurt go Chris

(27:14):
going to Russia. I think that was like a comment
on the whole Chris going to Russia.
Maybe, And then apparently Blaine's got into Niata when we
didn't know he was applying or auditioning.
Remember in season 4 we had like1000 episodes of Kurt and Rachel
auditioning for Niata. I would have.
And this one we just got moving out.

(27:36):
What was his song? Are you telling me that you
didn't want to see Blaine Anderson sing like a heartfelt,
emotional ballad to Whoopi Goldberg?
Like it? It was Teenage Dream Niata
version. My heart hurts.
And we were. Robbed not to get his audition.
I'm literally pissed about it. We've been through so much.
You're absolutely right and it probably would have been Teenage

(27:59):
Dream. Just like Rachel doing Don't
stop believing for fun and girl.Take a moment to thank Benny
Blanco. And so we we would not have
Darren Chris if not for Benny Blanco.
Thank you Benny Blanco. I don't think we would have
passed to season 3 of Glee without Benny Blanco.
Trevor, do we 100%? Probably every best selling Glee

(28:24):
song is a fucking Benny Blanco song.
Probably. Probably that chart.
We need that like flow chart of Glee hits Benny Blanco.
Like we haven't actually talked about any of the music well.
Because we have to. We have to get to the first one.
We. Haven't actually gotten to the
first one. Which we do now, because for

(28:47):
reasons, they've decided that what the Glee club needs most
right now is a roast. Yes, I guess.
A gentle roast or curtain Mercedes get everyone in the the
auditorium to reminisce. But really, it's to like, gently

(29:08):
tell Rachel and Santana that they're being bitches to each
other, basically. Which we which they've known.
They know it's like a surprise to them.
Today, tomorrow, forever. So they're like, we're here's a
fake feud between me and like curtain Mercedes about TOTS and

(29:29):
this. Is that feud was not fake.
That feud the the the tots feud was real.
That was a deep cut about a deep.
Cut about Tots and like we mended our feud.
So so you should mend your feud and we're gonna heal our hearts
with a song which is I am changing from Dreamgirls which I
fast forwarded through. Oh yes.

(29:51):
The Kurt Stan I also did not payattention to it.
I mean I'm glad he got a song, like I can't be mad about that,
but they could not have picked amore boring song for them to do
together. Beautiful gowns.
I thought it was funny that like, this is OK.
I thought it was funny that thisis very clearly like a hey, you

(30:14):
2. This has gone on for far too
long. And then midway through, like
the second chorus, they literally shine a spotlight on
to both of them where they're sitting.
And and Rachel's like, oh, yes, thank you, a spotlight.
And Santana's literally like putting her hand in front of her
face like, this is stupid. Please don't like please.

(30:34):
I also thought for two seconds about the implications of the
fact that Kurt and Mercedes are having lunch in the high school
cafeteria. Which means these kids, these
like either like high school graduates or like high school
graduates who are like freshmen in college, are like eating

(30:59):
lunch at the high school cafeteria for a week.
Yeah, they share free reign, apparently.
Like. Have they been doing this every
time they visit? And also, why would you want
that? Why would you want that?
Yeah, nobody wants that to go back and eat their high school
cafeteria food. I feel very confident in that
statement. I think my whole, I actually,

(31:23):
frankly, I missed the entire Rachel Santana part of Curt
Mercedes because my little brainwas just like, yeah, you guys
are still fighting. Is this still a plot point?
OK, great. What I did not miss was Mercedes
soft launching, I guess Quinn and Puck talking about another
accidental pregnancy. And I was like, OK, ma'am, we

(31:47):
are not letting go of the fact that Quinn stayed with you when
she was pregnant and nobody evermentioned it ever again.
Yes ma'am. Also you saying I want my
friends to have an accidental pregnancy?
You. Her body's probably still not
properly healed from her first pregnancy.
Yeah, she jumped right back intothe world.

(32:08):
I was. I was.
And for me, it just came out of absolutely nowhere.
Absolutely nowhere. I was very confused, but like,
OK, here we go. She is a freshman in college at
an Ivy. Yeah, well, didn't stop her the
first time. They wasted.
Absolutely no time in making Quinn's whole personality about

(32:28):
a man again. They literally again, it's been
this entire fucking show except for skank Quinn.
That was like the only time her whole personality and then I
mean, she had the Ryan Seacrest tattoo, so maybe it still was
about a man you. Know what just.
To be fair, that was the best part.
I we all we all should know by this by now.
If you do not I am a skank Quinngirl I.

(32:52):
Are there people that aren't? I mean, I'm an exclusively skank
Quin girl. If every character was just
played by Skank Quinn, I would be.
I understand. But Speaking of making Quinn's
whole story about a man, and I'mjumping way ahead here, very
sorry. And we'll talk about it again
when we get there, but Quinn andPuck do like a song in the choir

(33:16):
room. No, let's talk about it now,
because I don't want to talk about it again.
Why? It is so faberry coded the
entire performance they're focused on fucking Rachel Berry
like giving like heart eyes and Quinn for Bray.
And I'm like, you could have made it, you could have done,
you could have made the different choice.
Well, here's why they made that choice is because the show wants

(33:38):
you to believe that Finn and Rachel were soul mates and Puck
and Quinn were soul mates and both of these pairs of soul
mates found each other in high school and then Rachel doesn't
get to have hers anymore. So anybody who happens to be in
love and around her it. It's not about them as a couple.
This song where they are singingand like we are a couple and

(34:01):
we're going to start dating again.
It's not actually about them. It's about how Rachel feels
about it. It absolutely is how Rachel
feels about it because she's theprotagonist and main character
in every aspect of her life forever.
However, I will take your point and raise you a second one.
Soul mates are actually Finn andPuck and Quinn and Rachel.

(34:22):
That's why he's just a Little Mix up with the factory guys.
It's fine. I want, I wish.
We had gotten some sort of acknowledgement in front of Puck
that Santana and Quinn slept together.
Yes, my God, yes. Yeah, that would be.
That'd never get brought up. Yeah.
This episode too gay. Oh, we're getting to the gay

(34:46):
stuff and I have some opinions. All right.
I'm so excited to hear your thoughts and feelings about
everything that's about to happen.
Just like the lyrics of what does it give me just to read
like just give me just give me areason like beautiful song.
Love it. Not in the episode.
It's so like you're saying, coded to make them sound like

(35:07):
forever and always and souls andlike oh they've been back
together for like 6 hours and you're trying to tell me that
this has been meant to be since the beginning?
She had a different boyfriend yesterday.
Also why were they immediately like so much PDA like?
I oh, they were just. Not.
Necessary. They are straight in each

(35:29):
other's mouth singing this song.The whole time, the whole time I
was, I was like, I actually really like the song as a song,
yeah. And you're making it icky.
Imagine how awkward this is for Marley.
Yeah. I prefer not to think about it
for Marley, but that's OK. I really like Marley.
Puck was dating Kitty and Kitty's like in the room.

(35:53):
Yeah. Your ex-boyfriend is just
macking on his baby Mama right in front of you.
Like it's so weird. Who?
A lot of exes in that room. OK, Rachel, Mercedes, Quinn,
Santana. So if we if we rewinded back to
less than six months in Showtime, Kitty was like, I want

(36:14):
to be exactly like you to Quinn on the Thanksgiving episode.
I forgot about that, wow. And now she's like watching the
guy that she was like dating forthe Sadie Hawkins episode.
Are you trying to make sense of this show?
I'm not the one that brought this up.

(36:37):
My bad. OK, well, Speaking of, you know,
enemies to lovers, I guess we do.
We need to need to now move intothe bathroom I believe.
I mean, I'm good for like an hour, but after that?
Yeah, so. So Rachel goes to Santana with a
peace offering and she's like, I'm going to give you 10

(36:57):
guaranteed shows. After.
Three months, like, first of all, like it's a negotiation.
Secondly, that's not a bad offer.
No, it's not. It's really OK.
It's not. And also like we've seen with
Lea Michele, like she's going toget those shows anyway.
So like, just hold on well. I do believe Rachel Berry for

(37:18):
the first like 6 months of the show would do 8 shows a week.
Leah Michelle She. Leaves.
OK, OK. In.
Character that is out of character.
Let's be clear. That's that's, that's Glia we're
talking about, Rachel. But but character Rachel leaves.

(37:41):
No, I know, but the writers screwed her over.
That's very Would season 1 Rachel have left?
No. No.
Season 1 I don't even think season 3 Rachel would have.
No, very true. I I actually reject that whole
plot line because it makes no sense.
You're like, I don't understand what's happening.
You're just for. Anything.
Yeah. It's it's lame.
But like Rachel goes and she's like, I'll give you 10,

(38:02):
guaranteed. Like I'll give you 10 shows and
they can be any 10 shows you want, however configuration you
want. Like she's like they can be 10
shows in a row. They can be spread out however
you want. And then Santana throws it back
in her face and it's like, no, because I'm going to go.
I'll show girls on you and I'll win.

(38:24):
Girly pop. You're not the one that got
cast. Yeah.
And Rachel's not in a like, evenif the actor could negotiate
this for you, this is her first show.
She's not in a place to negotiate this for you.
She can't go up to the producer and say hi.

(38:46):
The understudy is actually goingto be the the lead.
Can you imagine how pissed off the audience would be?
Like, hey, every, there's gonna be like 10 surprise shows where
I've chosen to have the understudy go on.
Oh no, I'm not even talking about that.
I'm talking about Santana sayingactually I want Fanny Bryce.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, does that make sense?

(39:08):
The last show that I did, we didthe musical version of like the
Percy Jackson show and. I saw that in down, like, yeah.
Yeah, yeah. No, I did it at the Skokie
Theater, which is a building that is falling apart, so not
bad. It was cute, though.

(39:30):
Like, like we were not allowed to have water on stage at the
musical theater. At the musical theater
adaptation of the Percy Jackson Son of Poseidon show.
Are you joking? Less effective, but yeah.
Yeah. And the, and the, the three
leads had understudies, but the understudies were part of the

(39:52):
ensemble. So if you had an understudy go
on, then somebody else had to cover their track.
And the lead, the person who wasplaying Percy, went up to their
understudy and was like, I'm thinking or no, went up to our
director and was like, I'm thinking of giving so and so a
show. And the director?

(40:14):
Had to kindly pull aside this person who is 10 years older
than her and say that's not yourplace, No, you don't get to do
that. And that was a like storefront
non Equity show where the actorsgot paid $250.
You think that's going to happenfor a fucking Broadway revival?

(40:38):
I mean, this is how I feel aboutthem casting Rachel Berry in the
first place in the Broadway revival.
Like no, no, no one's going to pay ticket prices for that.
Like you would literally have tobe giving them away for free.
Yeah, anyway. Come see our show that
capitalized it, I don't know, $10 million and our ticket

(41:00):
prices are going to have to be $450 for orchestra with no name,
no name, nowhere, nobody, nothing, no.
Oh my God, that's going to go ongreat.
She does throw out a really great line that I love for
Santana, which is no more scrapsRachel I.
Love that though. And I was like, you know what?

(41:21):
Yes, I'll take that. Thank you.
I love that line. I also love her thing about she
has to express her, express her venom.
Because if I don't express my venom at least once a day, I get
constipated. Yeah, I do remember that
becoming like a fandom staple. I love that because that's how I
text Allison so I don't say shiton Tumblr.

(41:42):
I participated, unfortunately I feel the need to.
I have to now gift that so that I can just slap it, auto
reaction everything I do like. Sorry guys, this is my daily
venom. Smack it's.
Just I have to like so I don't say it publicly and you know,
then get anons, but that no scraps conversation and kind of

(42:04):
their whole bathroom conversation.
Number one is why I hate their second conversation.
I don't hate it. I just, I don't like it where
Santana admits that she has beensucking all the celebration out
of Rachel's role and that she's been a bitch her whole life and
that she always does this and that.
She's just a mean person. It's like, whoa, OK, no, you are

(42:28):
a strong person. You have a lot of opinions.
You don't take shit from people as much as possible like you are
also some I mean a lot of the episodes you're like 1516 years
old and you're learning how to process emotions and you're.
Not great at it all the time. And you lashed out at people
because you're bundles of nervesand anxiety and.
And you're hiding things about yourself for the majority of

(42:48):
this show. That doesn't equate to you being
a mean bad person. It equates to you reacting to
somebody who has been mean to you a lot of the time and who
has been an antagonist to you and has fought you for supremacy
inside of the the thunderdome ofthe choir room.

(43:11):
And to suddenly say something like I mean and you're right is
bullshit. Well, they even.
That. They even have in in that second
conversation you're talking about like I believe Rachel even
asked her like what did I ever do to you?
And Santana says nothing. And I'm like, bullshit.
This also goes back to the conversation that Mercedes and

(43:36):
Rachel had in the bathroom last episode where Mercedes confesses
that she thinks of Rachel as oneof her tormentors from high
school. And I don't it wasn't
intentional because white men wrote this show.
But I do think it's very interesting that her two like
people that she that Rachel feels she has to show everyone

(43:57):
she is better than are two womenof color who are equally as
talented as her and don't have the same like goals.
Like, Rachel has always wanted to be a Broadway star, and for
as long as we've known that Santana has aspirations outside
of like, being in the Cheerios and being successful there,

(44:19):
she's wanted to just be famous. And Mercedes has always wanted
to be a recording artist. Those are three very separate
tracks that can coincide if the person who is like, doing that
wants them to. But they don't have to, and
Rachel decided to make everything about herself,

(44:41):
thereby taking experiences away from other people that affected
those other people. And Rachel doesn't see that as
tormenting them because she can't see past.
Like her face doesn't know you know?
I think early on Kurt also wouldhave fit into that too.
Kurt sort of like turned into her sidekick as a way of just

(45:03):
like, cropping Rachel up insteadof continuing to fight her.
But early. On SO, yeah.
And I think they. Yeah, they gave Kurt like his
little fashion thing off to the side, I think, to take him away
from the the battle because it was then it was like 4 against
1. And I, I don't know, there was
enough time for them to do that.And it starts to look like a

(45:25):
hate crime. It is like two women of color
and then the other gay characterand it's like, OK, let's stop
this. And they they put him off to
fashion and then completely forgot about the storyline that
actually fit really, really wellwith him in New York with Sarah
Jessica Parker. His name?

(45:47):
Isabel Isabel Wright Beautiful storyline.
Keeps him in New York. Keeps him on a different track,
separate but equal. Keeps him in New York.
Keeps him doing something that is entertainment, that is
exciting. That and that is.

(46:07):
His that is his That is not Broadway.
He can do his band right on the side, perform, get his Glee
songs, get his royalty payments as well as the rest of the cast,
and do his own fucking thing. That makes it even more
frustrating that like they didn't know anything to do with
Rachel besides continually give her enemies.

(46:28):
Like imagine if Rachel had just like found something she was
passionate about or made a friend at Niata instead of you
know. A friend that she didn't fuck.
Exactly, I was just saying that she didn't sleep with or.
Rachel doesn't know how to make friends.
She doesn't. She doesn't friends, she just
makes enemies. And then this and then these two

(46:49):
episodes just serve as a way of everybody bending over and,
like, almost bending the knee toRachel's supremacy.
And like, you know, like, oh, you actually never did anything
wrong. And it's like that, you know,
which is the way of the show. It's the way it's always been
done. But it's just very disingenuous

(47:10):
to then go and say like, no, actually Santana's just a mean
person and she's just been, you know, cuz like, I don't think we
ever get an actual reason as to why Santana decided to audition
for the understudy role. But I do think it has something
to do with just wanting to spendtime with her friends and

(47:32):
wanting to like make friends with other people because
performing is where she felt happy.
We don't like if we look at, youknow, Santana, the track she was
on like at University of Kentucky, the the Cardinals
outfit. Then she leaves that to go move

(47:57):
in with her best frenemy to thengo work alongside her best
frenemy to audition and at the under city role of the show of
her best frenemy. Like there is nothing as as
grumpy as Santana is and can be about it.
Her actions are saying I want tolove you.

(48:18):
And also, she's she's the one that gets freaking insufferable.
And she's the one that gets Rachel and Kurt the jobs at the
diner, and she's the one that convinces Rachel to join the
band. And she is the one that kind of

(48:42):
saves their asses. Always, always.
She's the one that, like is actually savvy to do a lot of
other stuff. I just, I all wall.
Yeah. I just, I hate this.
I hate this for them. I, I, it is so rare.
We we woobify a lot in fandom. There are there are characters

(49:02):
who whenever they deserve it. Get the like soft puppy.
Oh you've never done anything wrong in your whole life
treatment. It is so upsetting to see it in
Canon. Yeah.
It's just like Rachel babies, you've, you've never done
anything wrong in your whole life.
It's like we have 5 1/2. We've 4 1/2 seasons of her being
a monster. Like stop it, cut it out.

(49:24):
Sent someone to a crack house. Literally like audition for
something. Things I completely forgot about
for 500 Alec. What's crazy is it's going to
happen at least like 3 more times too.
Like she's going to do somethingabsolutely off the wall.
Or at that. Level absolutely off the wall

(49:44):
and never face any consequences and everybody will just say, oh,
it's OK, you're fine. I know this was brought up and
talked about a lot in fandom, and I cannot remember if we
talked about a long time ago on the podcast.
I'm sure we did and I'm sure it has been here and in other
episodes. But God does it just hit really

(50:05):
hard that the whether or not they meant to.
Rachel Berry is written with a narcissistic disorder.
And there's no way you can look at it without seeing that she's
got like some serious, serious narcissistic tendencies where
it's just like has absolutely nofeelings or emotions for anybody

(50:28):
else except for what they can doto help her and has absolutely
no ability to, yeah, see what anybody does outside of how it
furthers, furthers her. Adriana.
And what you were saying basically made me go, oh, yeah.
She's just, she's just narcissistic personality
disorder. Like in Persona, like in

(50:49):
Personified. It's just like, yeah, it's who
she is. Well, Speaking of other things
that are only tangentially related but still have
absolutely no place in this freaking episode of Glee, we
must now move to Holly Holiday and the Animal Husbandry Club.
Must we? Oh, because there's music here.
God bless. Yeah, I guess.

(51:10):
Well. There is they, they, they.
She does a song and they. Yeah, Hot first.
First she. Does one of her classic I'm
going to dress up as a historical character lessons.
It was Temple Grandin. And that was for reasons I Yeah,
she. She did happen in Temple Grandin

(51:32):
to teach. And did she wear a thundercoat?
She should have worn A thundercoat.
No, it's to to teach. I actually hardly took a note
here because I was like, EW. But yeah, it's it's.

(51:53):
I would love to get whose idea this is and it came up with
really, and it really is just tobridge between like between the
scene and the song because like all it is is just to get her to
say, just because I did all these things doesn't mean I
didn't know how to party. So that she can then sing party
all the time. Which was great, sure.

(52:42):
I, I really sat there and I was like, oh, this is great.
This is a fun dance, like a, a dream sequence.
And then she ends the scene withoh, see, that was a great, great
field trip. And I was like so.
She took all those kids out of class to a roller brink.
I really appreciated like 2/3 ofthe way through the song You
like forget the focus on like 2 of the animal husbandry kids who

(53:04):
are just like looking at each other back and forth.
Like what? What I feel like that is how
most of the school feels most ofthe time.
It's just like. What the?
Fuck is happening in no wonder no one graduates like.
Oh yeah. She just bursts in dressed

(53:27):
inappropriately or offensively apparently, because they do get
a lot of letters afterwards. And then and then somehow
magically switches to a 1970s disco roller rink attire and
then they go to a bubble party at a roller rink.
Nobody has signed field trip permission slips, so.

(53:49):
But it's Glee. No wonder the parents are
pissed. I don't know who pays for this
because the Glee club not havingmoney is in fact part of the
problem. I can't imagine the animal
husbandry club has money for a bubble party and no one broke
any bones so I guess that's good.
Roller skating and bubbling. They looked hot in their outfits

(54:14):
I guess. Where's that she's?
There's Eddie Murphy for party all the time.
Lot of lot of sequins, lot of bubbles.
I don't hate when Holly Holiday sings, honestly.
She's not a terrible singer. There's something about her
voice that's very just like, allright, I'll bop to this.
It's not excessive. It's not trying very hard.

(54:36):
She's just like having a good time on a pop song so I doubt.
Just having fun. Just having a good time.
It's a forgettable song. I honestly forgot this happened
and then I was like, oh, a sequence outfit.
Great. I saw it and I was like, Oh
yeah, I remember those behind the scenes pictures.
I remember Darren's yellow suit and I was like.

(54:57):
Yes, my, my notes. My notes now say that Brittany
and Santana are doing soft, romantic things.
B. Do you want to talk about not
your lesbian whatever, whatever nonsense is happening between
Brittany and Santana? OK, I will say I read, I I read
a Reddit thread and I feel slightly better about it, but

(55:18):
OK. So Santana walks into the choir
room and it's filled with lilies.
Like legitimately a flowers field.
How much money does Brittany have?
What? How did she get buckets and
buckets and buckets of lilies? I love.
That they stole them from a Funeral Home.
Absolutely. She had to have.
That sounds legit. I love that they stayed in for

(55:39):
like multiple scenes after that because they're really, what the
fuck do we do the flowers? But she Santana's like, what's
up with all the lilies? And she's like, they're the
lesbian of flowers. Now.
There are a lot of lesbian flowers, but lilies are not
really one of them. Violets and lavender, sure, but

(56:01):
Lily's not especially. But I read a Reddit thread and
get this. It was an R slash Gleece.
This is like legit somebody who watched this episode.
And then it was like R Lily's the lesbian of flowers.
Like, I need to know. And apparently it was a
reference to two things, GeorgiaO'Keeffe, paintings of Lily's
that look like vaginas. And the movie Imagine Me and You

(56:25):
apparently has Lily's as like a whole part of the plot line.
Yeah. Yes.
But do we think, OK, but is thata Glee writers are making that
reference or do we think that Brittany actually knows both of
those things? That's a good question.

(56:46):
I would believe that Brittany knows about the Georgia O'Keeffe
painting. She wouldn't know that it was
Georgia O'Keeffe, but she would know about the vagina flowers.
Yeah, if she had said like they kind of look like a vaginas, I
would have been like, OK, like. That would be the Britney logic
I would expect. Yeah, yeah, maybe that line was
there and it got cut and they were like, you can't say vagina.
We're pushing the. We already have gays making out

(57:07):
because they didn't even get to kiss in this scene also which I
also have opinions about. Yeah, I thought that was always
the, that was always the joke isthat the sensors always only
allowed like 1 gay couple to getto like have any sort of
physical presence together in one episode per time.
It's true. If it would, it would be funny
if it wasn't so sad. Like it's just like cuddling or

(57:30):
like nose nuzzling or like a long dramatic hug or whatever.
They're teenagers, OK? They're horny.
It's weird. But in this scene, they also
have a conversation and in it basically Santana's trying to
well, because Brittany presents Santana with tickets to one way

(57:53):
tickets to Lesbos Island outstanding which is.
I love that she knew that was a place like that.
Seems like something that like Britney wouldn't like know for
some reason. Unless she googled lesbian
places. Right.
And like, that was the first thing that that came up was
Lesbos. And she's like, Oh yeah,

(58:14):
totally. And they have this conversation
about how, you know, Brittany doesn't want to go back to MIT,
but Santana's got to go back to her life and how Santana said
she's going to be rich and famous and I'll get back on my
like, that's not how things work.
Soapbox for like 5 seconds. Only the top top, top of

(58:39):
Broadway stars are rich and famous, and it's when they go
and do things outside of Broadway that actually make them
money. Jeremy Jordan, who is currently
like I think he's currently workshopping something, but like
the big thing that he recently did was like The Great Gatsby
musical. He probably made more money from

(59:02):
like however many seasons of TheCW Supergirl that he was in then
Newsies, which is the thing thatmade him very well known.
And he's nowhere near as famous,well known, or recognizable then
I would say any given Bachelor contestant.

(59:23):
Yeah, for sure. Like I don't know why you.
Insert to a bachelor but me and Allison are going to have a
conniption. No, because I watch and I'm just
like, I think the general population would recognize like
Ben Higgins, bachelor #20 a lot more than this point.

(59:45):
Jeremy Jordan. Just trust.
Trust that she's correct. Adriana, are you in the pit?
I'm very upset that they didn't do more Bachelor references on
Glee, just by the way. I think that that would have
been perfect. It would have been great.
It's because it's not like a competing.
Network, yeah. Otherwise they probably would
have. Well.

(01:00:06):
Speaking of things that are competing for my attention and
losing every fucking time, we once again have to serenade Tina
Cohen Chang out of an emotional meltdown.
You too. Does the world need a stripped
down acoustic version of Loser? Like no.
And the world is worse. For it, I'm not mad about it,

(01:00:29):
OK, I will fight. I will stand and defend this
garbage version of this garbage song.
I will defend it. I think loser like me is a.
Fun song, like is it a good song?
No, but it is fun because it's upbeat and it's defiant and they
sang it like in front of an audience.
So like a stripped down acousticversion of three Glee club

(01:00:52):
members just doesn't feel right.I think they didn't want to pay
the royalties on another song. Literally.
And they didn't have to sing. Too many guest stars excuse to.
Put Darren at a piano. It also goes back to all the
pennies that they have. They had already used all the
pennies. I will also say, I guess the

(01:01:13):
only thing that it's it's not animprovement, I guess.
OK, so we haven't been doing thething of is it an improvement?
But this this one is not this song is not an improvement on
the previous version of the song.
But it does get points because this time we actually get Darren
singing on it. And the lead, like the lead
vocalist on this version of the song, are people who did not get

(01:01:36):
highlighted in the previous version of the song.
Sure. Play.
Is it better? No.
No, but I'm not. Like I said, I'm not mad.
It is one of the more transformed redos.
There are several that are like basically exactly the same.
So I do, I do appreciate that they went somewhere with it.
Yeah, yes. Even if I do skip it.

(01:02:00):
I listened to it because I didn't remember that it happened
and even though it's 2025, I still listen to Darren's songs.
As you should. Loser Like Me is still on my
favorite songs list. The OG I felt like you were.
OG. I felt like you were like
sitting in a group. Well, I guess you kind of are

(01:02:23):
and like announce. Emily and I still listen to
Darren Christmas. Exactly that's.
How it exactly sounded? Do you feel better?
No. Glee Anonymous.
That's the. Name of the podcast?
So then Santana and Rachel make up, they make up whatever

(01:02:50):
Santana text to the producer, which is a crazy thing to do and
says I'm breaking my contract. I'm not going to be like, she's
like, I'm no longer the, the US of of this production of FG.
She didn't have to do that. She could have still been the
understudy and not go on. I don't understand the whole
thing honestly. It's also just like you can't

(01:03:12):
like they in a real show, they would have just cast another
understudy or they would have like promoted one of the swings
or one of the ensemble members. You know, all it shows is that
it was like all about the competition and it was not.
And it was like about not wanting Rachel to win.
And it wasn't something that sheactually, I feel like if she did

(01:03:34):
want it, she wouldn't have like just given up like that.
I, it's like, you know, she's now basically saying like, our
friendship is more important to me than like winning this thing
that I don't actually want. So then they go and they sing in
the choir room and they sing Be OK.
And that song, I liked it enoughthat I downloaded the original

(01:03:57):
version, but they sound nice. I had no recollection of the
song and I liked it. Yeah, it was fine.
Serviceable, it's fine. Yeah.
Got the job, done it. Was like it was fine next.
It was fine. Holly comes up to Artie in the
hallway and Artie is ready to DTF art.

(01:04:18):
Artie is down. Artie is just ready to bed that
adult woman immediately. Your son, Artie.
And instead. He's a high school senior, yeah.
He just Holly's coming to him for his video making expertise.
That is not what he agrees to, but that's what the purpose was

(01:04:40):
for, for reasons. See.
I have a note in here that says Sue is actually a really good
principal and I can't remember why on earth I would have
written that down. Is it about helping?
We'll get a job interview. No, not I don't think so.
Yeah. I think it's all the angry
letters they get from members ofthe Animal Husbandry Club and

(01:05:02):
the National Autism Association.And she's like, hey, that's the
end of your extracurricular musical experiment because your
stunt was garbage. That's the but like the fact
that she gave them permission todo it.
She gave them permission to do it because she cares about them.
But one strike. This was not no, stop it.

(01:05:24):
I'm protecting these children. But also.
Two non faculty members of the school, a substitute and a
random adult. Yeah, April wasn't even a part
of it. That one she wasn't in.
She's like in the first scene and then the last one, actually.
What was Kristin Chenoweth up to?

(01:05:44):
Trouble with that short haircut?Yeah, I didn't like the haircut.
I did not. Didn't work for haircut.
I love a short haircut, but not that one.
It was a little John and Kate +8.
Yes, it was quite Karen I was going to.
Say that. Oh God.
It was too. It's a little.
It was a little that, but yeah. So Will gets a letter near the

(01:06:06):
end telling him to go to the auditorium, and we find out that
somewhere in all of this, they've had the time to film a
We Love Will Schuster video for him that plays to make him feel
better. Also for his well.
It's. Like for his.

(01:06:27):
Kid too. And.
His kid. So that he should be sad.
So that the kid knows that his dad or his or her dad or their
dad was awesome. Because it kind of sounds like
Will Schuster is dying. Like he'll never a little.
He's killing him off Goodbye. Sir, literally how it reads.
Never. Really, you'll know he's your

(01:06:49):
dad, but just know that he was awesome.
Like, I think he's gonna raise his kid.
I think the background plot thatwe have been missing this entire
time is that Will Schuster has been preserved and alive by The
Sound of Music. He is.
Like. He is a fairy, and I mean that
in the true sense of the word. Of like he needs applause.

(01:07:11):
To live, he needs songs to live and.
This is, and this is how he'll stay alive.
So this video, this video plays right and it's.
On a screen we've never seen. And for me, it's half completely

(01:07:32):
absurd and half screaming. Glee is not a documentary.
The way that Lea Michele has to say, like, I love him to her ex,
like over and over and over again.
I'm just like, oh, God, Glee is not a documentary.
Oh, God, Yeah. It's also how much of this, how
much of this is like the actor saying this to Ryan Murphy.
Yes, because Ryan Murphy gave them their careers.

(01:07:57):
I don't like that that made it. Worse.
Thank you for making it worse. You're.
Right, it was already bad. I do have.
I do have. I will kill on this hill.
OK, guys, you're going. To kill on this hill.
Yeah, I'm not going to die on it.
I'm going to kill on this hill. Oh my God, I'm.
Kind of stealing that. I'm not going to die on it.
I'm going to kill on it because in this video we get Kurt and

(01:08:18):
Blaine who say that, you know, whatever, whatever, whatever.
We just had a baby. We and Blaine pops in.
We used the surrogate and Quinn pops in.
I donated the egg. Yeah, yes.
Get Rachel out of here. Yeah.
Skank my skank, trio my skank T3.
I also like I love the the constant to fit in with what is

(01:08:41):
actual Canon and in the end it is Rachel carrying Quinn's baby.
I is that, I mean, is that how it worked?
Quinn's egg? Rachel's.
Yeah. Yeah, it's.
Simple called IVF. Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I it. Was like not again.

(01:09:02):
Yeah, just like, I do think it was quite sweet.
It's not a thing that would happen organically, no.
Or in reality, no, but also sure.
Like it's like they are. It was like a pretzel twist to

(01:09:27):
be like, we want a video of themsaying like where I'm going to
be in 10 years, but we're going to put it in the context of
Will's unborn baby. Like those aren't those two
things don't normally go together.
Like you would just be like, hey, baby, like this is what
happened now and in the past that we're preserving because
it's about to be over, Not hey, baby, that we will presumably
know once you're born. Here's where we think we're

(01:09:49):
going to be in 10 years. Like that just doesn't make
sense. Because it's the series finale.
They should have done like a time capsule thing or something,
but like, I don't know if they wanted to do this.
I think this is where I'll be in10 years.
Like it just didn't make sense. Speaking of it being a season or
series finale though, they then go into Don't Stop Believing

(01:10:10):
for. Version 47.
Yeah, for like the 47th time in this show.
And we start with the Core 5 andthen the OG Glee Club of like
the first season. And by the chorus, we have all
of the Glee Hub members joining in.

(01:10:31):
And I do have to give the show props because this is the first
time in the history of the 47 times they've done this song
that Mister Shu sings in this song.

(01:10:52):
Working hard to get my feel everybody wants a thrill.
Paying anything to roll the dicejust one more time.

(01:11:17):
That's nice. Is that better?
It's better that we haven't had to suffer through it before
because this one is like a farewell song for like the
entire concept of the Glee club,and it's like everybody giving
their goodbye to it. And he sings the entire second.
Verse because it's the series finale.
Yeah. I think.
They also just wanted a a way toreplace Finn without it being

(01:11:43):
overly. Yeah, I mean, they kind of did
though, 'cause. They had.
They had. They had.
Sings in his lower register. In his lower register.
It was nice. It was nice, very nice.
'Cause this full range was on display this episode.
Yeah, it was every note. But it's interesting to me that
they put the Don't Stop Believing redo here.

(01:12:05):
Not that it didn't make sense, of course it did.
But then like, do you do it again at the end of Season 6?
They know at this point there isa Season 6 and they're going to
have to have a final song. I don't know.
I feel like you would say don't stop believing for that instead
of this. But I guess they just hedge
their bets on like, we don't know what we're going to do
later. So might.

(01:12:26):
As well do it here. Let's go for it now, yeah?
This whole chronological bringing back of the Glee club
did get me it did get me. I got a little I got a little
washy. I got a little like caught up in
my chest. It did got, it did get me it.
It made me for just a brief moment, go.
Should I start at Season 1 again?

(01:12:46):
No. That's an interesting choice.
I didn't do. We did original choreography.
Yeah, yeah, The choreo was really good.
The choreo really made the song.It was really good.
Too bad it wasn't the original choreo to push it.
That's the reason to restart theseries right now.

(01:13:08):
That's true. There you go.
It is kind of nice because one of the little through lines in
the episode is that every time we go into the choir room, it's
more and more bare. And so we have this final scene
of like the Season 4 newbies, like doing the last cleaning up

(01:13:29):
of the choir room. And they have one last little
scene where Marley's like, you know, it's over, but like, we
were a part of something really,really special.
And then Tina has to interrupt and be like, you're going to
miss my big moment of graduating, I guess.
OK, these people knew you for less than a year.
Like please calm down Graduation.

(01:13:53):
All 15. All 15 of them.
At least I didn't have someone sing Glory Days on stage while
they graduated. Again, I hated that.
And having A and having the graduates like play the
instruments. Yeah, that was wild.
The little acapella pomp and circumstance.
That was cute. Cool.
We have we have Becky graduate, which is really nice and then

(01:14:18):
Santana calls in a favor with Sue to have Brittany graduate.
Very sweet. And she makes a comment about
how even everyone deserves a graduation even if it's a year
late. I'm like she got held back.
She didn't like leave to in like.
Early, right? But then she left early to go to
MIT. Graduated early.
During her super senior year. Yeah, I don't know.

(01:14:40):
The whole thing made no sense. So she really should have been
graduating anyways. I don't.
Know. Whatever teen that interrupts
her, it was cute. Yeah, Tina takes the time on
stage to have a conversation while other people are still
graduating. Bit rude because this is where
she tells them that she can't goto New York because she got a

(01:15:03):
call from Brown and that she's been accepted.
Like, but OK. But other people are still doing
their thing, so if you could save.
This if you just like not give your back to the audience too.
Yeah, she's got to like. Cheap.
Yourself out a little bit and that's that's it for the kids.
Say the kids, they're there are kids.
Well, you know, they're 18/17/18.

(01:15:25):
They're kids. They're they're the kids of the
show. Because then we go to the last
scene, which is Sue and Shu, which was I, I swear this entire
scene was written by and for Emily.
For me it's. Me and nobody else.

(01:15:45):
Because Sue comes in and shares the last of her like vintage
wine coolers with Will Schuster,and I'm honestly not sure if
there's a greater declaration oflove that that Sue Sylvester
could share. I mean like the hair of her
track suits. Like maybe she'd give him given

(01:16:08):
him a track jacket like like a high.
School from the back. Like, yeah.
She's. Yeah, she's like, I'm going to
miss this fight with you becauseit's like our version of making
out. And he wants to do more with the
kids. And she's like, I got you, bud,
because I got you. An interview with Carmel High
School for their Glee club director from Vocal Adrenaline.

(01:16:31):
Because I love you. Also like she is the real this.
Much. Because she she literally tells
him you were a terrible history teacher and an even worse
Spanish teacher. But if there's one place where
you thrived it and like one place where you actually changed
kids lives, it was in this room.And you should be like, you
should continue doing that and imagine what you could do with a

(01:16:54):
budget. Yeah, yeah.
I'm not going to give you that budget, but.
You can't like this school can'tgive you that budget, but that
school has a team that, you know, in the last few years
hasn't had the leadership to continue winning.
But it it will, you know, And they have, Yeah.

(01:17:21):
Close enough to keep their datesgoing.
This, this was the closest thingthat I think we've ever seen to
a Sue Sylvester. Just like open declaration of
love, love. And it, it was just it, it blew
my mind just a little bit that it took us 4 1/2 seasons, but

(01:17:45):
you finally got enemies to enemies to lovers.
It's also like an open declaration of respect, which is
a lot. Harder to do.
Yeah, it's better. It's harder to do.
Sue leaves and then they have these little voice overs, like
things that happened in the choir room or in the show after

(01:18:06):
as he's like packing up to go and they give the last voice
over to. I believe it's the season 3
Nationals episode where Finn says who Mr. Shu we?
Went around the room and everybody said what they wanted
to win this thing for and we allsaid the same thing.

(01:18:29):
We want to win this for you. And I thought that it was really
like, because it's been, becausethe show has really been like
how everybody who's in that roomchanges each other's lives just
by virtue of being in it. Like the kids teach the teacher

(01:18:50):
as much as the teacher teaches the kids.
And and then it like zooms and like he like she leaves and he
he like shuts the lights and it zooms into like the like piano
seat. And then you hear like the the
the students laughs and the episode ends.
I was like, and this is where the show should have ended.

(01:19:13):
Like yes. Mm hmm.
This is where it should have ended.
This is this is like this is a this is a series finale closing
shot. It's it's perfect.
Fade to black, we're done. Put the title card up and walk
out. It's weird.
If anything, they could have just done the next episodes with

(01:19:34):
like a subtitle like Glee New York.
So you would know that it's like, it's a great ending, but
not for season, not for episode 13 of Yeah, 'cause I'm pretty
sure there also wasn't even a week in between 5:13 and 5:14.
Like it, there wasn't even like a no, no, no 'cause in, I

(01:19:54):
believe in the timeline of the show, it's like a six month
jump, but you're going, you're going from graduation and then
they have to get into school. And I, yeah, I believe the, the
the that starts in like the second semester of what would be
the sophomore and freshman year of these kids in college.
But I believe in airing time they didn't even have a weak

(01:20:18):
hiatus between episodes because this aired in March and by the
time I had spring break in Aprilwe were already on the St.
DS episode. So this aired March 25th and
then New New York airs March or April 1st.

(01:20:39):
Yeah, yeah, that's the next weekthere's.
It feels like there at least should have been a little like,
you know, mid season break between this.
No, just laying in. I guess that was the idea.
Yeah, well, OK, we need to pick like a favorite song or really
like we can't all pick a favorite song because we can't
make a single decision. But did we really cover like the

(01:21:04):
range of songs and if one was done like the the best, you know
what I. Mean if the redo was the best.
Redo was the best. From last episode and this one.
Yeah. Oh.
We could do that. There was only.
One song in this episode that was, well, two I guess.
Loser like me and Don't stop believing.

(01:21:25):
Did they do I am changing before?
I feel like I don't remember. No, I don't think I am.
I am changing and the Santana Rachel song.
We're both new. And party all the time.
Definitely new still. New.
Just give me a reason, definitely.
New Because of the Heart was cutfrom the episode.
Oh, that's crazy. Right.
But that would have been a redo,yeah.

(01:21:45):
I don't know guys, I am still standing very firmly in front of
loser like me Acoustic version. I respect your standing. 10 toes
down, 10 toes down. I'm not ten toes down for it,
but I'm not going to lie, anytime somebody says party all
the time, I start singing the song.

(01:22:06):
So I just I'm by saying I that is a better version.
I just fucking love that song. So I'm.
Not going to kill anyone for party all the time, but I think
I liked it. I I liked Be OK actually because
it it was like a a surprise for me because I'd absolutely
forgotten it existed. Yeah, I was.

(01:22:27):
Like, oh nice. So it's almost like a new song.
I think we can take Don't Stop believing off the running
because like. I feel like also every single
time that they redo it it loses the emotional like pay off.

(01:22:47):
It's not the visuals sometimes, right?
Like yeah, unless the song. And like the last time that they
did it was for Rachel's auditionfor Funny Girl.
Which was not that long ago. Which was not really that long
ago in Showtime, it would have been like 3 months.
In viewer time. It's been a year.
Still not that long. No because I feel like before

(01:23:09):
that the last time they did it was regional since season 1.
Songs We weren't going to pick one, but it's not don't stop
believing it's. Not we're not going to pick one,
but we're not picking that one. It's.
Not don't stop believing and it's not just give me a reason.
And the song should be give me just a reason frankly, because
the grammar is weird, correct? Yeah.

(01:23:34):
We're all writers and we all usejust way too often.
But we know it's give me just a reason, not just give me a
reason, right? No.
Well, I'm so used to. That's why I'm like, no, just
give me your because it's conversational.
It's like, just give me a reasonto not fucking leave you give
me. Just but in the song give.
Me. No.
It's just give me a reason. Just a little bit.

(01:23:55):
Enough. Yes.
Oh my God, am I wrong? No.
The downbeat starts on the drast.
I must give me a reason just a little bit.
Somewhat fast forwarded through that performance and names.
No, I absolutely Fast forward through it because I knew Kurt
and Lane were not going to be holding hands in the background.

(01:24:16):
So I. Was like we were just making goo
goo wines at each other for three minutes.
It was awful. It was.
He hated it. And I the only reason I really
know I can go like full till on the song is because that's my
tag for Kate Argent. Fair enough also.
Why? I don't care.
OK, let's be clear. The only two remakes in this
episode are Loser Like Me and Don't Stop Believing All and

(01:24:37):
Total Clips of The Heart, which wasn't in the episode.
So we're picking the best remake.
It's got to be Loser Like Me by process of elimination,
unfortunately I will. You don't.
Allison wins, and the rest of usall lose the universe.
We're all losers did. You have a favorite line.

(01:24:59):
Oh, the venom. Oh yeah.
The venom line. I have a different one.
I want to hear them. I have a it's kind of
sentimental. But so after they sing, just
give me a reason. Shoe has this weird ass line of
saying that that kind of goes full circle because that's the
last song that'll ever be sung in the Glee club.
And I was like, that's a weird way to say that.

(01:25:22):
But he says we all have more songs to sing.
We just Can't Sing them in here anymore.
And I thought that was like an actually really nice sentiment
because it's not saying like, your your life is not going to
have music anymore. Your life is not going to have
these people anymore. It's just not going to be in
this room. And if they had only kept that.

(01:25:45):
Right. What a note to end on could have
been. The show the the episode also
keeps going. But Oh yeah, no, I mean, but
like in the, in the sense of that being a sentiment from from
the from like a last episode sentiment.
Yeah, anybody else? The line that made me laugh just

(01:26:07):
because I didn't remember it wasthe 1,000,000 Moms thing.
There's really only 100,000, buteach and every one of them is an
uptight bitch. Yeah.
I still have to go with we used the surrogate.
I donated the egg. She just pops in so happy.
Like, yeah. Love that it's me.

(01:26:30):
Do we do we have to say one nicething?
What are that? That's the thing I like cuz
there's. You think we said nice?
We said, we said. A lot of nice things, yeah, OK.
We did say some nice things, so we're gonna skip it.
I'm cool. We've reached our limit.
No more nice things. No, we're good.
We're good. OK, well then thank you to
everyone for suffering through this episode with us and.

(01:26:54):
We're a delight, OK episode was not, but we are delight.
So it was not, but we are, but we.
Are we did manage to wrangle mavback into it so you're.
Welcome. Yeah.
Thanks for being here, Mav. Only been a couple years.
I've got, I got a mic in the interim, so there's that.
We dragged her back into the country by.

(01:27:15):
How does it feel, Mav? Like in general, I'm exhausted.
Well. That's also a.
Description of the podcast. Oh, the podcast.
An hour with us and she's like afucking.
Ex No, that's just from the state of the world.
No, it's fun. It's fun to be back.
I I will be straight on us. I didn't actually watch this

(01:27:38):
episode, so it was actually justa lot more fun to react to
everybody else's reactions. I was the meta on this.
Sorry guys. Adriana, I will let you decide
how much of this to cut out. No.
Most of it excellent, most of itso we can just we can just
create a caveat, yes, I thought.The PC part was pretty great,

(01:27:58):
not gonna lie, it was funny. I'll.
Cut in and out of it. OK, let me do a little wrap up
here so we can. I have to go to bed.
OK, so thank you to everyone forlistening.
You can find us on the Internet at Fandom on the Rocks and, you
know, join us next time for the next episode where we are
permanently in New York for the rest of the season, I believe.

(01:28:21):
For all six episodes of it. For all six episodes with half
of the cast. So, you know, take that as you
will. And I guess that's what you
missed on Holly Holidays. Fun bunch.
Incredible. Legend of.
The end of Glee. You've been listening to Glee on

(01:28:42):
the Rocks, a Fandom on the Rockspodcast.
A huge thank you to our sound editor, Adriana.
For more episodes, subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or
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(01:29:04):
On the Rock subscribers get ad free content, exclusive bonus
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