All Episodes

November 12, 2024 50 mins

Keywords

masculinity, toxic masculinity, emotional expression, sexual shame, healing, therapy, male identity, self-love, shame, vulnerability, sexuality, attachment, pornography, parenting, communication, body image, affection, children, sex education, emotional health

Summary

In this conversation, Efrain and Sam Jolman explore the complexities of masculinity, the challenges men face in expressing emotions, and the impact of shame on male sexuality. Sam shares insights from his book, 'The Sex Talk You Never Got,' discussing the importance of understanding and reclaiming the essence of masculinity while addressing the issues of toxic masculinity and the subtle forms of sexual abuse that can shape a man's identity. The dialogue emphasizes the need for men to embrace their emotional vulnerabilities and to break the silence surrounding their sexual experiences. In this conversation, Sam Jolman discusses the profound impact of early experiences of touch and affection on emotional health and sexuality. He explores the complexities of pornography, emphasizing the need for curiosity and understanding in overcoming its effects. The dialogue shifts to the importance of addressing children's curiosity about sex, advocating for open and ongoing conversations to foster healthy attitudes. Finally, Jolman highlights the significance of parents addressing their own sexual shame to create a safe space for their children to ask questions and learn about sexuality in a healthy context.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to Sam Jolman

04:38 The Essence of Masculinity

06:35 Understanding Toxic Masculinity

10:37 Shame and Emotional Expression in Men

13:49 Healing Sexual Shame

17:49 The Impact of Subtle Sexual Abuse

21:44 Breaking the Silence on Sexual Experiences

26:46 The Impact of Touch and Affection

28:56 Understanding Pornography and Its Effects

33:37 Navigating Children's Curiosity About Sex

40:45 The Importance of Open Conversations About Sex

49:26 Outro.mp4

Sam Jolman

My guest today is Sam Jolman. Sam is a trauma therapist with over twenty years of experience specializing in men’s issues and sexual trauma recovery. Being a therapist has given him a front row seat to hear hundreds of men and women share their stories. His writing flows out of this unique opportunity to help people know and heal their stories, and find greater sexual wholeness and aliveness. He received his master’s in counseling from Reformed Theological Seminary and was further trained in Narrative Focused Trauma Care through the Allender Center at The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology. Sam lives in Colorado with his wife and three sons. Together, they enjoy exploring the best camping spots in Colorado in a pop-up camper. Sam goes to therapy, loves fly fishing and can often be found trying to catch his breath on the floor of his local CrossFit gym. During our conversation we discuss topics out of his latest book “The Sex Talk you Never Got” Reclaiming the Heart of Sexual Masculinity” I wish you great insights and healing from this episode of Fatherhood from the Heart

More on Sam:

https://www.samjolman.com/

https://samjolman.substack.com/

https://www.instagram.com/samjolman/

https://www.facebook.com/samjolman


My Information 

Thank you for taking the time to listen to my podcast. If you want to learn more about me and my coaching offers, vi

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