The Past Doesn’t Define You. This Does

Are you still carrying the shame of who you used to be?

In this episode of Father Like the Father, DJ opens up about the mental battle of trying to lead your family while still feeling like the old you is in control. If you’ve ever wrestled with the fear that your past disqualifies you—this one’s for you.

📖 2 Corinthians 5:17 – “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation…”
But walking that out isn’t always easy.

DJ shares how learning to lead from wholeness instead of performance changed everything—especially as a dad.

This week, write down one lie you keep believing about yourself.
Then write God’s truth next to it.
And share it—in your journal, with your wife, or inside Rooted in Brotherhood.

You don’t have to pretend anymore. You just have to keep walking.

If this message hit home, you're not alone.
Join a community of faith-filled dads who are growing together, breaking cycles, and walking in the freedom God gives.

👇 Click the link below to join:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/282732511309028

🔨 Weekly Challenge:🙌 Join Rooted in Brotherhood (CTA):

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
What if the weight you're carrying isn't from today, but
from who you used to be? What up guys, DJ here.
Since it's Men's Mental Health Month, I want to speak directly
to the dads carrying more than they're letting on.
Some of us aren't just tired, we're worn down from trying to
be a better dad while still beating the old version of

(00:23):
ourselves. But I remind you of something
today. You don't have to stay.
Turn your Bibles. The Second Corinthians 5 verse
17 got my handy dandy Bible right here.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has
come, old has gone, the new is here.

(00:47):
That's not just theology, it's mental freedom.
If you're trying to father your kids while wrestling with shame,
burnout, addiction, or emotionalbaggage, I want you to hear
this. You're allowed to grow.
You're allowed to change. You're allowed to ask for help.
You're allowed to say I'm not OK, but I'm not staying here.

(01:11):
So I spent years trying to outperform my past, but what I
really needed was to confront it.
One day I looked in the mirror and asked, am I panting from who
I am or from whom? I'm afraid I still AM.

(01:31):
And that broke something open. The healing started not when I
performed better, but when I gothonest.
Here's a challenge for this weekguys.
Write down one thing you're still caring from your past
that's weighing on your mental health.
Then pray this out loud. God, I give you parts of me that
keep me stuck. Take me new.

(01:56):
Take one step this week to talk about it.
The friend counselor, your wife or with us in the Brotherhood.
Don't walk through this month alone.
Rooney and Brotherhood is our free Facebook group where faith
filled dads open up, grow together and build a better
legacy. We don't have all the answers,

(02:17):
but we're showing up. Click the link below to join us
because healing happens in community.