Brandon Kaitschuck: Insights on Self-Mastery and Sobriety

Episode Transcript
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Jon (00:06):
Welcome to the Feel Free podcast, the only podcast
that'll tell you to chase yourdreams and call you out on all
your bullshit, Myself included.
I got my really good friendBrandon K Chuck here Coming up
on 11 months sober 11th on the11th, actually 11th on the 11th.

Brandon (00:23):
Congratulations.
Thank you, sir.
Again Appreciate you.

Jon (00:27):
Big accomplishment there has completely I'd say
completely turned your lifearound in those 11 months.
Just finished his first Ironman a couple weeks ago too.
He's kicking ass in all areasof his life and now he's here to
visit me this weekend and Isaid we gotta do a fucking
podcast episode when you're intown.
So originally the topic todaywas gonna be him roasting the

(00:49):
fuck out of me and calling meout on my bullshit Cause, as you
know, the Feel Free podcasttook a little bit of a break for
some emotional difficultiesthat your boy had gone through,
which is no excuse.
So I would like to also face myshortcomings.
We also want to talk about allthe accomplishments that you've
done in the last 11 months, soit's just gonna be a nice mesh

(01:10):
of a conversation, pretty much.

Brandon (01:12):
Okay, man.

Jon (01:13):
So where would you like to start, would you?

Brandon (01:14):
like me to.
I mean, I'd first like to sayso, like we discussed this as
breakfast.
Some people aren't perfect likeJohn, and then some people are
perfect like me.
Exactly, I'm just kidding,that's so funny.
You're like, yeah, so we'rejust gonna talk shit about me
and then talk about everythinggreat he's done which?

Jon (01:29):
I was gonna say that.
I was gonna say that I wasgonna say that I was like it was
so funny, dude, let's not dothat.

Brandon (01:37):
We're all in the same fight, man.

Jon (01:38):
We're all just struggling humans pumping into each other,
trying to figure it out.

Brandon (01:42):
We're all in different areas in our life and we're
already, at different times, man, to make changes right, and
those are different changes.
It doesn't like yeah, the last11 months have been some of the
most.
I've learned some of the like.
I've leveraged and used thetools that I've learned the last
11 months and I've achieved ahigher level of fulfillment in

(02:05):
my physical, mental, spiritualand financial well-being.
But, having said that, there wasa lot of things like little
stones, right Pebbles thatkicked over the last few years
that paved the way to make a lotof this tremendous progress,
right, and it was like somethinglike a book or like a
psychedelic experience orsomething that somebody said to
me or someone that I walked into, like just bumped into and

(02:28):
spoke with.
And there's all these littlemoments and they all have an
impact, right, they all playsignificant role and they're all
a catalyst to getting sober,which ultimately allows for just
so much more growth in thoseother areas.
But there's, you know there's alot of ups and downs and that

(02:49):
we go through and you're comingup.
So you've got four years is itfour years or five years of
sobriety on your belt.

Jon (02:54):
It'll be five years in May Five in May yeah so I'm like
close to four and a half yearsnow.

Brandon (02:59):
Sure, you know and it doesn't you know once you
approach that.
It's just different challenges,right.

Jon (03:05):
It is.

Brandon (03:07):
It's just it's shifting and you feel these ebbs and
flows and there's going to be,for my understanding and early
sobriety.
There's like a honeymoon phase,right where you're filled with
so much energy.

Jon (03:16):
For sure, I will say that you have, you're hungry for this
change that you have in yourlife and you start seeing
positive results.
Like, don't get me wrong, likethe first couple months you
might not even see any resultsat all you're like I'm just
trying to be sober and get somegood habits in line.
Right, because in the day andage we live in, of the age of

(03:40):
information and what do you callit delayed gratification we
want everything right now, yeah,right.
So once you start seeing thoseresults coming in through the
honeymoon phase, you're filledwith all this energy and this
change and stuff and I loveseeing that in you right now and
it's great, it revitalizes mealmost and I see that, yeah, I
would.

(04:00):
I want to get back to a state ofthat correct.
I'm always very proud of mysobriety, you know, even as
everyone's known, I've had avery difficult year the last 12
months, but I've stayed soberthrough it all for sure and I'm
very grateful for that and Idon't.
It just reinforces in me that Ican go through some really

(04:21):
fucked up shit and and staysober for sure which is huge,
because the honeymoon phase, orlike the first couple years of
my sobriety like I'm not gonnasay it was, it wasn't easy,
right, but it was like I didn'thave something like really
fucked up happen in those threeyears, right, and then I lose
two cats in a span of one year,which kind of messes me up, have

(04:44):
some other things go wrong atwork and stuff and then in my
personal life and my health andstuff, so when it rains it pours
right absolutely in the wholewoe me, woe is me thing is still
part of the lower self that youtalk about so commonly.
Right, because that lower selfwas the addict in me.
Right for sure, and for thosethree and a half years that I

(05:05):
did all that work now.
The lower self reared its headin my last year.
It was like whispering.
The woe is me.
Crap in my ear and I'm like,yeah, woe is me.

Brandon (05:14):
I'm gonna fall off a little bit you know, stay sober,
yeah, but I'm not gonna live upto those expectations yeah, for
sure why I'd like to callmyself out on some of that, yeah
bullshit and that's and that'shealthy and that's um higher
self, taking accountability forthose decisions but not
wallowing in it instead, likewhat do we do different?

(05:34):
this time around this timearound, not like because it's
like there's is a dangerous,it's a dangerous spot to be into
feel self pity, self loading,like really like hate yourself,
right, like that's.
That's oftentimes a catalyst ina first step that's necessary
for change, right, recognizingthat.
But then taking that, beinglike I don't have to hate myself

(05:57):
.
That's the beauty in that.
I don't have to.
I, I deserve better, right, andI have the tools to treat
myself better and I, I can tapinto that right and that that's
a really beautiful place.
It's like, holy shit, I don'thave to be angry, I don't have
to be goreding myself, gorgingwith food, binging on whatever

(06:19):
it is.
We're unhealthy, addictive likethis is instant gratification.
The subtraction is pleasure.
You talked about delaying thatpleasure, right, and you feel so
much better over long periodsof time when you delay that like
still give yourself, enjoy shit, enjoy life and experience.
But delaying that gratificationand really enjoying the process
, the process based onprinciples and mission, right is

(06:42):
where you're going to havethose longer periods.
You're not.
It's not going to be a bunch ofups and downs where addicts
we're like we're sometimes likewe enjoy the misery to like we
enjoy the roller coaster rollercoaster is like, oh, if I'm
really low today and I have abetter day tomorrow, like I'm
gonna fucking feel like thatjump is going to be huge right
and so hi like it's a way right,so you get used to a little bit

(07:04):
of adrenaline, yeah absolutelydude.
So like getting complacent inthat misery.
But when you have a tightprocess and you no longer make
negotiations with lower self andcompromise like you had, you
have you live, that fulfillingand more thought.
The roller coaster isn't somuch a roller coaster it's not
it's just ups and downs.
Stability.

(07:24):
It's stability, right,stability and inner peace and
progress, and that's realspiritual fulfillment.
And, like you said, thathoneymoon phase right, that's
going to exist and you're goingto have that.
But where the real magichappens is when you master a
process.
You master, you master yourself, right, that's like self
mastery is the end results, theend goal.
My mentor, mohammed, talksabout it, his mentor talks about

(07:47):
it.
It's self mastery, that's thefucking goal and everything
stems from that self mastery,right, so that's the goal.
And then, in order to keep andretain that self mastery, it's
then teaching it.
So you find people, right, yougive that back and then you
mentor and coach others to align, because we need that
accountability on this.

Jon (08:08):
We need the accountability in society for sure this needs
to be something almost like thegame of telephone mm-hmm right.
That's what it is like, thatself mastery.
We change our lives for thebetter, and then we watch
everybody else also do it, andhelp them through it, and then
we have a whole planet of peoplewho all learn to love each
other in the show.

Brandon (08:29):
That's, that's, that's a goal for sure, right?
The goal is that you want evenyour enemies to do better,
because if they do better,they've got better mental health
, physical health and they'remore connected.
It's, it's going to be betterfor society, which should be
better for everybody.

Jon (08:42):
I say watching ourselves and our enemies learn to get
better.
What if we all just get betterat the point where we don't
really have like like a lot ofenemies here?

Brandon (08:51):
no for sure, man like and that's like and that goes
with like, letting go of anger,resentments and really genuinely
wanting the best for everyone.
And you can, you'll watch theworld.
You'll watch the world getbetter, but in that, you're
going to have blind spots.
Where you go through these lowsand these periods of like, you
will, you have it and this iswhy having a mentor is so

(09:12):
important to point out thoseblind spots.
And right, that's what Ilearned from Moe.
You know I mentioned that a lotit's, and he's working on a
piece right now.
I'll give him a shout out.
He's working on a piece andhe's creating his own things to
help bring that to light.
We need to have somebody that'sgoing to be like hey, you're
not, you're not looking here,you're missing something right,
and I want you to be aware ofthis because you're falling into

(09:33):
patterns of self-sabotage it'svery important to have that
perspective, for sure, man, it'swe miss it.
We can't catch everything.
We can't.
This is not a one.
The self mastery is, it's, it's, it is, it's a lot about self,
but you need to have the rightteam and support around you and
you need to be able to recognizewho are the people that are
good for that.
Who are the people in my lifethat, like I'm going to keep

(09:55):
around right, that we are goingto grow together, those
relationships and we're thepeople that are fucking toxic,
that I know that I don't need tospend my time with.
You know they're out there andit's.
It might sound like heartless,but, dude, you, you got to,
fucking got to get out of here.
I got to get out of my own way.
My, my number one thing isn'tother people, it's a self
mastery.

(10:16):
It's my lower self is the thingthat if I don't keep it in
check, it will fucking kill meyeah, it's myself, I will get my
way right.

Jon (10:25):
You're not going to get my way, no.

Brandon (10:27):
I'm gonna, I'll get my way before you get my fucking
for sure yeah.

Jon (10:31):
I think we've been our own worst enemies.
But that's like an addict,that's an addict thing.
You know, this isn't like.

Brandon (10:37):
I could be an addict is everyone thing.

Jon (10:38):
We all have lower self and higher self you know, for a long
time, or like in activeaddiction.
One of the things that fueledme was like not not only just
self-hatred, but hatred for likethe government, like religion
mass media for sure all of theseexternal factors correct, right
.
So I viewed them as enemies,you know, and that Hatred came

(11:01):
in many different forms and italso affected how I viewed
myself, for sure.
I viewed all of these thingsaround me as hating me.
Mm-hmm and then I ended uphating me, correct, right, so
that's the self-sabotage.
But then you start to realizeyou don't Truly have any enemies
outside of yourself, correct?
Once you start realizing whatlife is truly about correct.
And One thing I would like tomention and I'm calling myself

(11:25):
out on this bullshit is Beforemy cat passed away last August,
right, I'd like to say there waslike a there's probably a four
month span where I was, I was in, I was in whatever flow I Could
possibly be at that flow.
State your info state in termsof all of my routines okay,

(11:46):
health, wellness, podcastwriting, book, relationships
like great everything was likegetting to the point of being
very Efficient.
It was actually almost scaringme because it was getting too
efficient, okay, and tomonotonous and to Routine, like
we're getting bored.

(12:06):
I was getting bored right,because at this point too, I had
like I wasn't playing a lot ofvideo games, I wasn't watching
any anime, I didn't have anylike outside pleasure.
I'm like, oh, I'm just going toread books that are good for me
, right, work out, go to work.
Like doing all of these thingsthat are Super good and healthy
for me, sure, but anytime, likea thought would come by like,

(12:28):
hey, you can play this videogame or watch anime and be like,
no, that's not good for me, I'mgonna go do something that's
better for me, okay, all of thefree time I had didn't even go
for me to just take a step backand enjoy myself.
Okay, you know.
For sure so I got addicted tothe self mastery.
Yeah, to the point where, likeif I if I wanted to Enjoy
something, I would almost likepunish myself for it with more

(12:50):
work, yeah, and then I burnedmyself out, for sure also.
And then the cat thing happenedyeah, right, and then I fuck up
my knee and I can't playbasketball.
And then another cat thinghappened.
And then life started, yeah,tumbling a little bit like that,
right.
So this time around I need toget back to that routine that I
was in for those four months.

(13:11):
But when a time comes around onthe weekend, like, hey, john,
you take a break and just play avideo game, you should schedule
it.
It's scheduled to shut out rightyeah you'd be intentional with
rewarding right, yeah, yeah,that's what I know, I know, I
know now is what I need to do,yeah right, absolutely that's.

Brandon (13:26):
That seems like a good.
Yeah, good balance right becausein a lot of ways, what you're
so, what you're saying, andthat's this is an interesting
thing that you brought up right,because I'm I'm working with
somebody right now and he hadrecently mentioned that he felt
he felt some stress from arelationship that he had had
right and X partner of his, andthat got brought up and in order

(13:48):
to cope with that, he said hehad felt his higher self taking
over and started cleaning.
But arguably, now we have to.
We have to check ourselvesbecause now is this a
distraction.
So you might think likecleaning is good and that's like
cleaning your environment ishigher self.
But if we are doing thingsimpulsively, instead of coping
with negative emotion, whetherit's work, you can be addicted

(14:09):
to work and that will burn.
That's how burnout happens.
Oh, for sure, right is if wejust, instead of dealing, coping
with stuff and we just go, wejump right into work.
You're not actually feelingthrough lower self, you're not
taking time to mourn death,you're not taking time to feel
sad, mourn a relationship,you're just jumping right into
work.
And that's not good either.
So just because we seesomething from the outside is

(14:31):
inherently good does not meanthat that's a higher self
activity.
I think we use the example lasttime of like music right got a
buddy gets distracted instead ofworking doing his job during
the day, picks up an instrument,starts playing.
Great musicians should practicetheir instruments.
That's a good habit, but atwhat cost?

Jon (14:48):
so yeah, yeah it's.

Brandon (14:50):
It's that's where the intent really comes in, right
and so important to be awarethat.
And then, yeah, schedule thetime scheduled to fund dates,
and I've done a pretty good jobat that lately, but almost like
to the point to where, okay, wegot a review, you revisit the
mission statement.
Is everything I'm doing in linewith my core principles and
mission statement?
If not, there's either twothings that we do we reassess

(15:11):
the mission statement and what'simportant to us in our core
values we add on to that right,or we change the activities
we're doing to align with thatmission statement that we still
find reflects Ourself, ourhigher self, in the best way.

Jon (15:23):
So yeah, I got to do that.

Brandon (15:25):
I mean like I well.

Jon (15:26):
I have it's all written down.

Brandon (15:29):
Mm-hmm.

Jon (15:30):
You know it's just got to take action with that.
So in the in the last what I'm40 days off of nicotine now.
Congrats on that.
Thank you, appreciate that yeahlet's talk.

Brandon (15:39):
Let's talk a little bit about that, because I know this
is a common one.
I'm gonna use nicotine indifferent forms.
So your form of nicotine?
It sounds like, looks it's inthe form of Cigarillos, is that
okay?
Little maybe is this triggering?
You, there's Cigarillos like uhlike black and miles and shit
backwards, oh back, yeah, backwe just smoke, like most

(16:01):
motherfuckers like take those,they split them open and put
weed in them.
You're just smoking the back,yeah it's just smoking the back.
I'm gonna grease.

Jon (16:07):
Well, so here's you, so get always fuck.
I know what I am.
I'll always be white trash.

Brandon (16:20):
Bottles back to the party.
Yeah, that's like we all gotthat in ourselves, man.

Jon (16:25):
No, that's the Slim Shady LP.

Brandon (16:27):
Oh yeah the.

Jon (16:28):
If I had song Spit some bars.
If I had a million dollars a,buy a damn brewery and turn the
planet into alcoholics.
So there's this one line inthere that really resonated with
me and it's he goes.
I'm tired of taking pop bottlesback to the party store, like
in Michigan you can take bottlesback for money and shit here.
No, you can't do that.

Brandon (16:47):
Okay.

Jon (16:47):
No, so.
So yeah, I smoked theCigarillos.
I'm fucking white trash.

Brandon (16:51):
I've always been white trash.
No lower self has been whitetrash.

Jon (16:55):
I think, well, it's still a part of me, though it's part of
your higher self.

Brandon (16:59):
Well, it's just a part of you see self.
There's two cells.
This is well.
This is.
This is the approach that Itake, right?
I'm keeping that distance there, Right?

Jon (17:06):
right.

Brandon (17:06):
Trash hood.
Rhett John that takes popbottles back to the party store
and goes and gets backwards.

Jon (17:11):
Probably lower self, John right, right, right right, but
there's always it's.

Brandon (17:16):
It's kind of like the, it's like the yin and yang,
though, like in the dark side,you still have a light, okay,
like yeah, you want to leveragecorrect and and you and you want
to leverage Certain aspects ofthat Shet shadow person is what
you will, right right, you haveto.

Jon (17:33):
I think that was like Carl Jung talking about the shadow
person.
Charlie, yeah, um, in thatwhite trash self, or in that
just trashy individual that Iwas.
I.
Opportunistic is one goodcharacteristic out of that, yeah
, I'd also say, like the peopleI met, you know the things.
I learned about life because, ifyou know, I had always just

(17:53):
been spoiled upper middle classmy entire life.
I would have never learned howto truly love for sure myself.
The lower self, all the peoplewho struggle and stuff like,
yeah, me being a degenerate andsmoking backwards is, you know,
a lower self?

Brandon (18:09):
Yeah, that's why I did not do that, exactly, exactly.

Jon (18:12):
But like when I say I'll always be white trash like that,
that that person will always bea part of me for sure, and if I
go in just like you, if you, ifwe go and like speak public
speaker, we coach people and Isee somebody who's doing Shit
that I did.
That's still a part of me, forsure I want to know right, right

(18:33):
.
So I understand the dualitythat you're trying to like
separate.
I understand separation.

Brandon (18:37):
A part of you, there's two and there's two parts of you
right, still, john, though.
It's, I did it.
It's a part yet Correct, right,I'm gonna accountability for
that.

Jon (18:45):
Correct.
It's just not a person I wantto be.

Brandon (18:48):
It's not a person I want to be this lower self, but
I do you know.

Jon (18:54):
That lower self has helped me Relax mm-hmm but I get
addicted to relax you, let youleverage that.

Brandon (19:01):
So rose says you want to make that your bitch, you
want to work for you.

Jon (19:06):
Leverage it and I see it like.

Brandon (19:07):
I think even with like hip-hop right, you listen to
hip-hop songs like I listen alot of 50 cent.
It was this concert fuckingsick 50, you the fucking man
dude, I shit was the best dudeloved it.
And Get Richard I try an album.
These are a lot of like reallygangster-ass fucking songs about
Murdering and fucking, justlike getting you know, getting
the loot and just running up onmotherfuckers getting shot.

(19:29):
But and that Brings out a lotof ego, ego in the lower self.
But you leverage that likethere's nothing like listening
that shit to get pumped up for afucking sales meeting or to
just go crush the fucking day.
It's how you use it.
It's leverage it in 10, correct,it's your intent so you have to
learn to tap into that shit toservice you.
It's not like we're not fuckingmonks here right that.

Jon (19:51):
I Like how you said that, because I've been telling myself
that for four years.
We could be, but I can't.
I can't help the world in a waythat I'd like to listen.
I'd love to just throw it allaway and go fucking sit on a
mountain.
A lot of people, not a lot ofpeople do that.

Brandon (20:09):
I can't do that.
Yeah, Well you.
That's not in line with whatyou're.

Jon (20:12):
It's not your goals are it's not any, nor am I.

Brandon (20:14):
This shit month like, if I, you can't be a monk.
I don't know.
Do monks do fucking pot?
Is there a podcast with thefucking monk?
Someone, someone.

Jon (20:22):
I've seen monks that come on podcast before okay, fucking
Amish like I don't know.
No, they still have phones andshit.
They do.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure.

Brandon (20:32):
Okay, let's get a monk on this fucking podcast.
I guess Like we're going to themountains, this fucking but.
But it almost makes you wonder.
Okay, you get these individualsthat go to live in these
mountains and these Buddhistmonasteries and Whatever, to
live a life of minimalism,essentially sleeping on sheets
of rock, having minimal food,eating vegetarian diet and

(20:56):
Meditating all day, and doing myyoga and shit, and these people
do exist, but it almost makesyou wonder if Individuals that
do such a thing again.
But when I talked about thisbefore, like you meet people at
these retreats like what thefuck are you running from, man?
Like you know what I mean therecould be now, if that it
depends on the intent, if yourintent to go do something like
that is fear-based, or I Want toget away from society because

(21:17):
it causes me too much stress yougot a question there.

Jon (21:21):
I, I all depends on intent it does.
You see, here's the thing I can.
I can see that you can view itas like for for you or I.
If we did that, we would be.
I think we would be runningbecause We've been gifted with
an ability to articulate, tospeak, to meet people, to go out
speaking.
We have to be a part of society.

(21:42):
In order to do that correct, wewere just up and leave for
years stressed out and I'm likethis, fuck, this shit.

Brandon (21:47):
I'm upset.
A relationship didn't work outand I'm like yeah, yeah, exactly
, I know that's what that wouldlook right, but I don't think
that.

Jon (21:55):
I think, dude, I don't think society and technology is
for everyone right now.
For sure I don't.
I don't think all of this,really processed food, really
fast life, working a nine tofive corporate job yeah, I don't
think everything that ishappening right now is is
Forever human for sure, if youwant absolutely you want to just
go eat the freshest food,correct next to a river, and

(22:18):
meditate and sleep and have goodrelate 100%.

Brandon (22:21):
Who am?
I know a hundred percent Idon't.

Jon (22:24):
I don't view it as like, I don't view it as running.

Brandon (22:27):
No, no, I'm saying it depends on the intent.
Yeah, for sure it depends onwho we're talking about.

Jon (22:31):
Oh no, a hundred percent depends on the intent.
It's like you're absolutelyright for you or I.
We're running.
That's yeah, so more speakingfrom self a hundred percent.

Brandon (22:38):
I totally agree with that dude.
I think there's a lot of peaceand solace and there's there's
nothing wrong with a life likethat.
But once again, it goes back towhat's the what's the intention
behind why you're doing thesethings right and just, and you
say it by anything cleaning,working, fucking, meditating
like what you know, meditatingit like the intent is to clear
your mind and be more peaceful.
Right, but right if it's,that's escapism and sometimes we

(23:01):
need to reset and resetting isgreat.
So you take a trip for thatstuff and that's uh, that's
important, but, yeah, just very,it's just something to be, it's
something to be mindful of atall times.
But you know, zach, we got ourfriend Zach.
He did that shit.
So he did a silent retreat fora week when he was in Thailand
and he went to the Buddhist.
Like Me, dude, he's like Like,after that I've never been

(23:24):
happier in my fucking life.
Like he said, it was a silentretreat for like a week.
They give you minimal food, youmeditate all day, you listen to
a monk speak and, like youdon't talk, you sleep on a
fucking bedrock, a rock, likejust a sheet of rock, no pillow.
This sounds great.
And he's like, dude, he's likeI can't describe the feeling I
had of like inner peace afterthat.

(23:45):
So it's like it's very real,like it's a very real thing and
it's so enticing.

Jon (23:50):
It is no man.

Brandon (23:52):
It's so that'd be like and that's a cool, a cool
experience, and.
But you're right, when you aregiven, when you're given a
Platform and opportunities andyou're like this is in line with
, like what I need to do, you'regiving a voice right.
There's like a moral andpersonal responsibility to
pursue that and you know, I'vecertainly made the decision that

(24:14):
, like, I'm gonna be someone whois in who's in the limelight
and it's like we're gonnafucking run with that shit.

Jon (24:21):
So so you've always had this.
You thought you would beentertainment, right.

Brandon (24:27):
Yeah.

Jon (24:28):
Yeah, I also, ever since I started loving really honestly,
ever since you know, we wereclass clowns in oh yeah, growing
up and shit, yeah, I alwaysknew like it was either
entertainment or speaking, orwhatever you want to call it.

Brandon (24:41):
Mm-hmm.

Jon (24:42):
Did you, did you think that somehow in the back of your
head in the last couple years?
Do you?
Did you like I don't think anyof this is gonna work until I
get sober?
Yeah, was there that thoughtthere?
Yeah, the gears.

Brandon (24:56):
The gears were turning a couple years ago, especially
with it.
Yeah, it was the alcohol and Iwas like this is going to hinder
my ability to be the bestversion of myself, right, and I
knew that the writing was on thewall to Stop that like, and I
and it was peaceful because I'mlike we're getting there, like I
got a little bit more shit todo, but it was kind of funny and

(25:20):
you know, I've I've got a closefriend now who is Currently
sobering up and the gear startedturning for him about six
months ago.
We talk and he's like I'mfucking getting there, I said
listen, dude, and I I'm a firmbeliever that you can't really
tell someone like you need to,like you're gonna get there when
you get there, buddy, and it'sgonna take maybe some blackouts

(25:42):
for some people.
That takes DUIs, it takeslosing your fucking relationship
, it takes a or or you fuckingdie.
Unfortunately so, and if thatdoesn't and that never scared
me- it just takes loss yeah ittakes.
It takes some form of loss.
The death thing never scared meneither it was more of like
dying and then, wow, I didn't doanything.

(26:03):
It was like I died, like, okay,I'm dead, so like who gives a
shit?
But like, wow, I didn't do, Ididn't have that beautiful Life
and I didn't create things, Ididn't make an impact or do
anything significant.
And that's a fucking shame,because, cuz you knew you could
yeah yeah, because I, because Iknow I can right and that
bothered me a lot more.

(26:24):
Um, intrinsically then, then,like a fear of, like an overdose
, it's like well, like you know,like whatever dude, like
fucking.

Jon (26:33):
It was just it wasn't.
It was just not living up toyour own expectations
disappointing thing ever like.

Brandon (26:39):
I read this somewhere they said like the definition of
hell is like you die, and thenyou see, like the Version of
yourself, that you actuallycould have been a fuck up you
like Meet him and like, yeah,like this was, like could have,
like you fucking lost it andthat shit sucked because I
thought about that.
I'm like oh, man did I letmyself down?

Jon (26:59):
Yeah, that would be brutal.

Brandon (27:01):
Yeah, dude, it is so like that version of self, that
real higher version of self,that height frequency person
used to like.
This is the person I want tolook like, feel like, be like
the accomplishments, theachievements like this is what I
envision.
This is what high performers doI saw, I think about is like
that's.
I'm like quite literallyTransforming into that person

(27:25):
and doing this place haunted.
You guys see that shit, yes.

Jon (27:31):
Yeah, no, it's no wind in here, there's not.

Brandon (27:35):
That's cool.
It was like my future self it'sreally a sign like yeah dude,
you got it.

Jon (27:40):
I will say that it is not put up Very sturdily.
No, I kind of just shoved itbehind the foam over there.
So Hell yeah, thank you Ifucking hate this wall and
everything on it.
Yeah, yeah, should we, uh,should we talk about this wall?

Brandon (27:59):
Dude, please yeah, take it away, Okay so we revamped
the podcast room.

Jon (28:05):
We got two really comfy professional chairs here.
Now Um bang bang.
We also got coffee tables orend tables.
We also got my book book got aplug.
The book we got yeah, no, my,my, my audio dude told me to put
that.

Brandon (28:21):
There he goes and Lisa told me like you got heavy, you
gotta have your book there.
You're a published author, myfriend.

Jon (28:27):
Yeah, I also have a bowls when I have.
I have another table coming ininstead of this one.
It's gonna look a lot nicer,okay, and I'm gonna put the book
there, and then I'm also gonnaput Some CDs that I ordered CDs.

Brandon (28:39):
Well, I have I have.

Jon (28:41):
I have a CD from Muncie coming in.

Brandon (28:44):
Oh, I know he mailed it and then I also have.

Jon (28:47):
My buddy quash was the man.
Shoutout to quash.

Brandon (28:52):
I got his CDs that I'm gonna put up here as well.

Jon (28:55):
Cool.
Otherwise, I got this for my30th birthday.
My cousin Jordan and his wifeTaryn got me that.
Really good, feel free podcastlittle light up sign right there
.
That's badass.
Um, lisa got me this.
I choose you peak Pokemon thing.
This picture right here ofWrigley Field in this is must be
the 20s or 30s was actually atthe old tuxedo building.

Brandon (29:19):
Your grandfather owner, some shit.

Jon (29:20):
Yeah, that my grandparents owned over in Elmhurst so that
was one of the pictures there.
I was able to take it alongwith that skyman Michael Jordan
thing right there.

Brandon (29:30):
Nice.

Jon (29:30):
Yeah, this on-air thing I got for my aunt, techie got for
my 30th.

Brandon (29:34):
Okay, light up signs.
That's these are Nice gifts,man right, I'm gonna take care
of you.

Jon (29:38):
They love you very much and I think jet Jackie got me this
for a Grab bag for Christmas.

Brandon (29:46):
Okay, it's Santa.

Jon (29:47):
Oh, because everyone knows I love fucking hooping.

Brandon (29:50):
Yeah, she got me that shit.
I'm gonna go for John.
He's gonna join the semi-pro QLeague, was it called?

Jon (29:57):
G Lee.
Yeah, yeah, brandon isconvinced that I'm going to be a
G League basketball playerfamily full of athletes.

Brandon (30:03):
Man Yep Joe's going for the.

Jon (30:04):
Olympics and I'm gonna be in the NBA.

Brandon (30:07):
Fucking awesome, fucking like the best story ever
.
Have a Netflix show on thisfucking family.

Jon (30:12):
I swear I Maybe it'd be cool yeah, it would be cool
Actually.
And then the rest we got.
We got some, some albums, somevinyls.
I actually got.
This is my favorite Grizz album.
Mad Libbets, his first album.

Brandon (30:25):
Oh yeah.

Jon (30:26):
Yeah, so I got that for a grab bag for Christmas too.
He stopped playing right, Ithink he, yeah, he's taking a
little break.

Brandon (30:32):
A little break.
He's fucking made.
He's done so good.
He showed so much love at allthe shows man.

Jon (30:37):
I think he's just all base-necked or doubt or
something you know.

Brandon (30:41):
I'd be tired man.
That guy, the energy he's hedefinitely over delivered for
his black fan base.
Every single time I see thatguy play.

Jon (30:48):
Yeah, he kills it awesome.

Brandon (30:50):
So yeah, he can enjoy that that break right Um.

Jon (30:54):
Slim Shady LP.
Slim Shady LP.
My cousin Joey got me that formy 30th, so probably my
favorites.
Probably my favorite M&M albumoh yeah, I don't see either say
that or the M&M show.

Brandon (31:06):
Yeah, everyone loves darker one like I didn't realize
, like cuz, like I forget, Ijust listen to all the songs,
right.
But I like, after going onSpotify I'm looking at Slim
Shady LP like there's somereally good song.
It was darker, it was likedefinitely it was funnier.

Jon (31:19):
I thought it was funny.

Brandon (31:21):
It was about drugs and death and, like you know, like
very dark and funny.
That's really where he, youknow his alter ego.

Jon (31:28):
Everybody loves the Marshall Mathers LP.

Brandon (31:31):
Okay, right, that's one of the big songs in there.
Let's, let me pull it on theMarshall matters.

Jon (31:35):
Yeah, real Slim Shady Kim.

Brandon (31:37):
Okay, Kim was.
Kim was like that was a realcontroversial yeah.

Jon (31:42):
Marshall Mathers another song, I'm back.
Okay, I'm kill you.
Yep bitch, I'm a kill youcriminal criminals.

Brandon (31:49):
Another one criminal is a Fucking great song, dude.

Jon (31:54):
some of that shit's just really fucking angry, I know,
but like yeah, it pumps you, itpumps you up.
I get it, but that's why I doit often.

Brandon (32:01):
I don't I used to so, when I used to Sell drugs and do
cocaine all the time.
It's all I listen to, yeah.

Jon (32:07):
I'm a criminal.

Brandon (32:08):
I'm driving around my car with like it, like you know
stuff and just like you'll neverfucking catch me.
You never catch me alive.
I thought everyone wasfollowing me.
I'm a fucking criminal.
I'm just like powder all overmy face, just like a damn mass
man an actual criminal yeah, Ilike embrace that version of
lower self and there's somethingenticing about Just about that

(32:31):
lifestyle.
But yeah, I mean his music,like I guess the Gen Z said that
shit fucks so good.

Jon (32:38):
Yeah, dude, yeah so brain damage?

Brandon (32:40):
Okay, so I'm shady.
Lp guilty conscience oh, we'retalking about that one.
Yeah, so role model, role modelso good as the world turns as
the world see.
Okay, I'm shady, so my favoriteoff this album that I know
still don't give a fuck.

Jon (32:55):
Yep.

Brandon (32:56):
I'm shady, I'm gonna say brain damage, guilty
conscience, and my name is.
What about?

Jon (33:01):
role model I.

Brandon (33:03):
I didn't really.
I mean like it's not, it's notone of my top.

Jon (33:07):
Not one of my top.
I love that fucking song.

Brandon (33:09):
Let's see what got Marshall matters.
I'll be kill you.
Stand I fucking, that's a,that's a gas.
That's a big gas song, yeah,the way I am, you know, I was
like okay with that, the realslim shady.
That's a banger to amityville,you know man, just like under

(33:30):
the influence, and then you gotcriminal.
I I grew up on it was theEminem show.
That was one I bumped.

Jon (33:36):
All I actually didn't even start listening to Eminem until
I was 19.
Oh, interesting yeah I mean Ihad heard his bigger songs like
till I collapse.
Lose yourself, okay, stan.

Brandon (33:46):
Yeah, I'd listen.

Jon (33:46):
I'd heard those growing up, but I didn't like full-on
listen to his discography frontto back until I was 19.

Brandon (33:54):
Okay, I studied him, studied him.

Jon (33:56):
Yeah, so, but then I don't know, man, that's just like that
album's like the funniest to meyeah, it's just, he's just such
he's so goofy in that one, Iagree, the wrong schemes and
he's.
He's just goofy dude, yeah andhis cadence in that one in his
voice is really high-pitchedlast night I OD'd on rush,
mushrooms and dust.

Brandon (34:14):
I got rushed to the hospital to get my system flush.
Shucks.
I'm an alcoholic and that's allI can say.
I call in the work, cuz all Ido is follow can play swallow
grenades.
Take about a bottle a day aTalk about how violent, I'll be
yeah so like that's so great, sogreat.

Jon (34:28):
You can't.
It's probably my favorite.
That is my favorite album byhim, so Joey bought that for me.

Brandon (34:33):
Okay, that's a good Bye .

Jon (34:34):
Yeah, and then the other one is a Metalcore album or post
hardcore.

Brandon (34:39):
Okay is that the screamo shit?

Jon (34:41):
that it's called screamo shit.

Brandon (34:44):
Can you do that in one of these mics or that?
Fuck the whole thing up.
Yeah, I'm not gonna do that.
Give us a scream, no.

Jon (34:49):
I'm not gonna no.
I am lame.
Jackie actually told me that Ihave to rap on my podcast.
Okay, she told me that I haveto, and then I'm like Jackie, I
don't, you know it's, it's awellness podcast.
She goes yeah Well, how many?
How many people who have apodcast can also rap, john?

Brandon (35:06):
I'm like I guess not a lot, that's true, right, she was
yeah, so you have to rap andI'm like alright, just just ease
up, ease up.
So, yeah, he does it all.
He's professional basketballplayer, ladies and gentlemen.
He's a rapper, a podcaster, ascreamo expert.
He's playing guitar, he's knowsmore about anime than anybody
I've ever met and Except one ohI got a tip for it.

(35:28):
All right, aiden's gonna listenthis podcast is he, he fucking
hates anime so every question.
I'll fight every question youhave for him, dude incorporate.
Yeah, so that's really.
It's a lot like this anime,like Do it because now he's
gonna know, because he's gonnalisten this.
But at least once in thepockets Don't tell him when and
try to ask him a question aroundanime.

(35:49):
And then, when he says, yeah, Idon't really watch anime, at
some other point the podcastalso bring up anime and ask him
another question about anime.
It'd be really funny to watchhim like get triggered by so,
aiden?

Jon (36:00):
Why do you hate anime?
Why are you a hater?

Brandon (36:04):
Don't hate, we made a joke.
So, like I you know we talkabout, we talk about the Tism a
lot.
See, this Tism seems to affecta lot of people.
I've got a lot of friends thathave the Tism and it's a
spectrum this Tism and you knowAiden has been very vocal about,
like some of his ass burgertype tendencies.
But I said, listen, dude, if youdon't like anime, that's

(36:25):
probably the most autistic thingsomebody can be interested in,
so I'm not sure you qualifyautistic because you hate anime
so much like you got it like ifyou don't like anime, dude, you
definitely have to beneurotypical, because it takes a
special kind of well now thatit's it's so widely Loved before
autism or anime anime Becausepeople used to get beat up for

(36:52):
watching anime or being nerds,like in the 90s.

Jon (36:54):
Yeah, yeah, people's asses, did you?
I?

Brandon (36:57):
fucked people up for watching really yeah, keep that
shit away from me, dude.

Jon (37:01):
You watch anime now wait, wait, hold on here's a funny
story too, because my buddy willhated fucking anime too.
Yeah, my sister hated anime,right, and I I watched anime,
like if you watched, listen tomy sister and I's other podcast
called just anime, the storiesthere about how the episodes you
have on that.
We just got one okay there's oneepisode but I grew up watching

(37:23):
anime and Will gave me shit,fucking all day about that shit.
And then finally, I think wewere like 20 or 19 and he texts
me one day and he goes Damn dude, I'm like halfway through full
metal.

Brandon (37:39):
Yeah, he goes, go.
The shit is gas, shit slaps.
He's never left, and he's justnever left.

Jon (37:46):
No same with no, yeah, same with my sister, though.
Yeah, like she really knows itwell like she, she wasn't about
it, and then and then shewatched one of them.

Brandon (38:00):
I think she was she watched death note.
Okay, classic, classic.
That's what started me a banger.

Jon (38:05):
I got my sister and another one called sword art online she
liked to, and then she justtook off from there.
Yeah, we're watching everythingthat we watch, you know, now
she's she's fluent in anime.

Brandon (38:16):
You're an anime family.
Yeah, you're an anime family.
I'm surprised.
It's honestly disappointing.
I know you speak Japanese atthis point.
I know I'm trying, man, it'sit's tough, languages tough,
it's tough.

Jon (38:27):
It's because I have a problem with auditory learning.

Brandon (38:32):
Okay, I'm a visual sounds.
Yeah, it sounds like an excuseso we can talk through this.
Yeah, I'm a visual.
I'm visual and problem-solvingright language is a very visual
thing, especially Japanese.
Yeah, I mean like visual.

Jon (38:43):
I mean, yeah, like that's one thing, but like if I hear
Sentences or words and stuff, itdoesn't really because you were
repeating a lot of Japaneseshit back from the anime last
night, right, but I don't knowwhat they mean all the time
Right yeah so I don't likeprocess it well.

Brandon (38:59):
And here's the thing I've been watching anime for 12
years.

Jon (39:02):
So of course, like, if I hear a word like that, I'll say
it yeah, you know.
But like like how you saidyou're good with like sentence
structure, another shit likethat grammar is so important in
language right, and that's whereI struggle at because, like we
were saying yesterday Englishand reading my worst subjects.
Even though you're like dude,you're a fucking author.
Yeah hated learning it formally.

Brandon (39:19):
I can, I can pump out pages.

Jon (39:21):
But that's where you, the editor, helps with the grammar
and yeah, it's not my strong, soI'll have you interesting.

Brandon (39:27):
Okay, right yeah.

Jon (39:28):
I get that they're not the same thing.
So, before we get back on task,I'd like to say yeah, aiden,
I'm gonna fight you about thisanime.
I can't wait, just just likeyou.

Brandon (39:36):
Really, I want to hear 30 minutes about you arguing
Positions like, just like to belike the most like combative
podcast.

Jon (39:43):
I hope he DMs me about it.
Fucking fight about this dudeup and eating liver and heart
for weeks now.
Fucking crush you.

Brandon (39:53):
You guys have some really good stuff to talk about,
man.

Jon (39:55):
Aiden and I yeah, I'm looking forward to that.
Yeah, I got hit him up.
I love that.

Brandon (39:59):
I love that the homies are homies.
I'm glad that you know friendgroups.
They intermingle and you guysare just.
You're such great, such greatsupport and homies to have
around brother, and I'm gladthat you have one offs and you
guys all have your ownfriendships and stuff now.

Jon (40:12):
I love that, that we're still friends yeah.

Brandon (40:20):
Right in the beginning I was fucking unforgivable.

Jon (40:22):
I was actually gonna drop you off at the train and say,
wow, this guy sucks, I gotta gethim out of here.

Brandon (40:28):
We're gonna take an Amtrak.
We're never coming back.

Jon (40:30):
We're never coming back.

Brandon (40:31):
Listen, I know another Chicago, john, and he's great.
He's a lot better than you, abetter than this one's perhaps
the greatest.

Jon (40:36):
whenever, whenever people talk about how awful this
Chicago John, as I tell him Igot some of my best men working
on it I am meeting with anotherChicago John, on Wednesday or no
Thursday, thursday it's a so Imet him, this gentleman, mutual
friends.

Brandon (40:53):
So basically we played a show, told play to show in New
York City.
We had another drummer fill in.
Our drummer couldn't make itand the drummer that filled in
awesome dude, extremely talented.
We're playing the show with himnext weekend.

Jon (41:06):
We're doing a show Thanks to me about this.

Brandon (41:08):
Yeah, his name is Zach and he filled in.
And then his buddy came to NewYork City and we were all
rehearsing before he went outand played the show.
He's like hey guys, this is myfriend Chicago John.
I said fuck you, I've alreadygot one of those.
This is unacceptable.
You're Chicago Johnny.
That never stuck.
He's now over.
The Chicago Johnny said whichone motherfucker.
They're like the one that youknow.

Jon (41:30):
So do you still identify as chops?
Um, it's an interestingquestion, because I don't like I
know, I don't, I don't like it.

Brandon (41:40):
I do not.
I do not identify as chops, youas you won't ever let's put
this way you will never seemyself Introduce myself, as I
will never introduce myself as ahowever and no anymore anymore.
There's no I will not introducemyself, but If somebody that I
know, that knows me from thatera, like I'm never gonna be,
like, oh you can?
It almost be weird if someonethat's called me that, since

(42:01):
I've known them, and they didn'tcall me, that I'd be like, call
me by how you know me.
Yeah, no, we're very much rightnow in Brandon.
Brandon, that might change.
You know a lot of spiritualchanges going on.
Maybe I'll change my name tosome Hindu shit.
I don't know, dude.
I don't know what I'm gonna see,but no, call me Brandon for

(42:25):
sure or I like, I like, b, Ilike, b, I like when women Be
right, be ran.

Jon (42:30):
No be, we're not this shit.
Be Roni.

Brandon (42:34):
I like when women call me B.

Jon (42:35):
I'll say I accepted B.
Okay, yeah.

Brandon (42:38):
No, b K, Don't fucking, don't fucking call me B K.

Jon (42:41):
B K.

Brandon (42:42):
Don't call me B K.

Jon (42:44):
Have not going into that, have it your way.

Brandon (42:47):
That's.
I get that, I get the humor,but we no.
B, k, b or Brandon.
Okay, okay, kate, chuck.
People in the way from highschool call me Kate Chuck.
What if I just call you Chuck?

Jon (42:57):
I'll I like that.
How about, charles don't?

Brandon (43:01):
call me Kate, either I don't Kate.
Don't call me Kate, maybe put,perhaps I'm thinking about buck.
You brought one up that nobodyknows, like nobody knows that
one buck, yeah, no, no, that'slike what my parents call me.
Are you fucking with me, cuzyou're at my house is.
I've never heard that.
Are you fucking with?

(43:22):
My mom and dad call me buck.

Jon (43:25):
I've never heard that before.
Yeah, I just put the end ofyour last name and the first is
already a first name.

Brandon (43:30):
They call me buck.
That's like a thing that myparents call me.
Wow, yeah, I'm like reallyemotional right now.
That's really funny.
You put, put that together,that's.
Yeah, that's one of mynicknames.
I was called Elvis for a while.

Jon (43:43):
Elvis, that way I burns in high school.

Brandon (43:46):
But you know, man, brandon, b or buck for my
parents is acceptable.
It depends on who's addressingme okay.
But I will.
If you misgender me, I swear.
I know that's very confusingwhat I am.
Don't fucking misgender me.

Jon (44:02):
Yeah, so what are you?

Brandon (44:06):
Thank you for asking.
Jonathan, yeah for John Johnnykicks Jonathan you know, just
call me guy Actually.
That's a one.
That's like people say like myguy, my dude pale bud, how about
?

Jon (44:21):
how about Sport champs?

Brandon (44:24):
or, oh my god, little man, little man, that's what.

Jon (44:28):
I call like younger, younger, younger humans.
It's up, little man give him anoogie.
Yeah, his hair a little bityeah how's it going?

Brandon (44:36):
champ Dude, that's so fucking emasculating.
I still got a champ.
Heard a lot about you.
Sport Are you?

Jon (44:42):
doing there?
Skippy, yeah, I am, I stillcall people that yeah, yeah.
It's funny.

Brandon (44:50):
I used to do, I have such a dick I used to do shit
like that lower self would dothings like that, like just to
get reactions out of you know,out of guys at parties and stuff
.
You're like it's funny orpurposely call them the wrong
name.

Jon (45:03):
Yeah, that's classic.

Brandon (45:04):
Yeah, this is my boyfriend Jeff.
I'd like Mike, so nice.
Like my name is Jeff.
Like whatever you say, jerry, Ihave a great night.

Jon (45:13):
Yeah, like alright guy, like I started, I started saying
ease up a lot.
Yeah, I say ease up to peopleyeah, ease up, just ease up, all
right, you know.

Brandon (45:26):
Triggers people more you like, tell them to fucking
chill out.
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,relax man.
Hey, well, dude, take like aright.
Holy shit, like dude, I do like, are you okay?
I?

Jon (45:36):
know, and you start doing that and then they like you,
almost gas like them intothinking there's something wrong
.

Brandon (45:41):
Yeah, whoa, just like, whoa, like, take steps back,
like they're gonna hit you.
Yeah, she pinches me, so it'sfine.

Jon (45:46):
Yeah, I get what I deserve abuse man.

Brandon (45:48):
I know I get what I deserve though, yeah, I hate
when she makes her pinch you.

Jon (45:54):
Yeah, I hate it too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So Wow, I said what are wetalking about?
So it was funny that youmentioned, before we went on,
one of the tangents.
We said something about asupport group and you're like
you're glad that the homies arehomies.
Yeah, right, so you're homies,that you're homies with up by
you like Muncie, such an awesomeindividual.

(46:16):
Uh-huh, aiden's fucking dopetoo.
Yeah, you know, I know you guysjust like like to hug each
other and just say the wordsBitcoin over and over and over
and over.
And over again together, becauseyou just love it so much we
love it.
That's a really good thing tocome together on it Just Bitcoin
.

Brandon (46:30):
It's the only thing we have in common.
The blockchain, yeah, yeah.

Jon (46:35):
Confused for other block and and, and then Aiden says I
gotta eat liver and then youstart saying I gotta eat liver.

Brandon (46:40):
And then you all Talking with Joe last night and
he's like just same, like, justall the same shit.
It's like we could all just I'mlike it's fucking crazy how
similar.

Jon (46:54):
Book idea.
You had the high performing.

Brandon (46:56):
Performing friends, yeah, high performing friends.
Yeah, yeah, that will, and thatwill get written.

Jon (47:01):
So we've talked a little bit about calling me on on some
of my slip-ups over the lastyear.

Brandon (47:06):
So don't even go there with me, right?
So let's talk about yourperfection a little bit.

Jon (47:11):
Let's talk about all the things Haven't fucked up on but
uh, no, it's so many mistakes,man.

Brandon (47:17):
I make so many fucking mistakes every day.

Jon (47:19):
Well, I was gonna say You're 11 months sober.
Now you have a few book ideasyou want to do.
You're also looking to get intothe public.

Brandon (47:29):
Okay, no, go ahead.
I You're also trying to getinto the public speaking, okay
what?

Jon (47:35):
what's coming first, what's coming next, or what are you
most excited about doing otherthan your self-mastery?

Brandon (47:42):
So Biggie Small said never let him know your next
move, appreciate it, appreciateit.
But, given that I'll give alittle sneak preview, where I
get the largest amount offulfillment is from a coaching
and mentorship perspective.
So that will be.

(48:04):
You know, we could talk aboutmoney, finances, career.
I've got a great idea on whatthat looks like for my future,
right, but in terms offulfillment, entrepreneurial
spirit and next steps in thatregard, right for my mental, you
know, fuck, even put thephysical on side, it's going to
be that coaching, coaching andmentorship and helping other

(48:27):
people that were in a positionsimilar to mine.
Everyone's got differentsituations, but helping people
with the weight loss right, I'mdown about 60 pounds.

Jon (48:35):
Congratulations on that.

Brandon (48:36):
Thanks, brother Six.
So, like March and I'll be,I'll be posting it before and
after picture once I hit 200.
I'm going down, I'm meetingAiden, my buddy Aiden, at 190.
And then I'm going to bulk backup to 200, 210.
But when I get down to 200,I'll post it before and after
picture 265 in March of lastyear I weighed in on Friday at
210.
So I was like 50, 55 pounds andhelping people get to that point

(49:02):
physically, mentally,emotionally, get off the drugs,
get off the alcohol, right, losethe weight, start respecting
and loving yourself, respectingand loving your time and
developing those strong skillsets, relationships and habits
right.
And I feel like you know I'm ata point where I've taken, I've

(49:22):
done enough to at the very leastbe have that influence and that
perspective to get people outof those dark places and get
them on the right track.
Right, I don't have all theanswers, no one has all the
answers, but I'm like wellequipped now and I'm confident
that I can, I can fucking helppeople.
There you go, I know what to do, nice, you know.

(49:43):
So that's that's going to be.
Those are the next steps.
Yes, there's a lot of big planson other horizons and other
aspects and I'm really excitedand opportunities with music and
writing and that's still goingto be a huge part.
Right Toad is we were.
It's just so much fun and I'mso blessed that there are all
these opportunities.
Man Like I quite literally likeit could go either way.

(50:04):
I could focus more time intoone and whatnot, but the true
fulfillment is going to comefrom a personal development,
coaching, life coaching,mentorship, public speaking and
kind of you know, dip in my toesinto that which, yeah, it'll be
cool, man, hell yeah.

Jon (50:25):
Also, you had completed your first Iron man Yup, full
Iron man a couple of weeks ago.
Let's talk a little bit aboutthat.

Brandon (50:32):
Well, I got a fucking hernia.

Jon (50:34):
I was going to say.
I was going to say went alittle hard there.
Yeah, dude for sure, but itwasn't the actual train.
I let my little bitch win.

Brandon (50:40):
I was being a bitch, were you being a bitch, being a
little bitch?
Get up, run more, stay hard.

Jon (50:46):
What's that from?

Brandon (50:47):
It's Goggins, right?
I don't know.

Jon (50:48):
It's not.
Goggins, goggins, stay hardthis guy gives me anxiety, does
he yeah?

Brandon (50:55):
Fuck that dude's like he's wild.
He's fucking wild.

Jon (50:58):
But so what are?
You saying I was going to sayso.
It wasn't the train or theactual Iron man that you got
hurt with.
It was saving some dude.
What happened?

Brandon (51:11):
It was during the race During the fucking race and this
is a theory, because I'm notsure when I got the hernia, but
after I realized it was a hernia, everyone was like, how the
fuck did you get a hernia froman iron?
You weren't lifting anything,because usually I guess you get
a hernia from like lifting it.
It's like a tear right.
So I'm like I don't know.

(51:32):
But when I ran the tape back inmy head after finishing the 112
mile bike ride, you jump rightinto the marathon.
Right, I got some water and goright in the marathon.
Around mile six I heardscreaming and shit.
It's like fucked up.
I'm like what's going on?
They're like we need help, weneed an ambulance and there's
skid marks on the trail thatwe're running and they're like

(51:55):
he fell over.
Somebody had driven like anelectronic, like an electric
vehicle that looks like a golfcart, like a huge golf cart, and
they went over this hill, overthe trail, and flipped over and
it landed on the guy's leg.
He was stuck underneath thevehicle.
So they're like we need runners, we need help.
So me, along with like shit, alot of people like ran over.
It was me, like 10, 15 otherguys, and we ran over.

(52:18):
This thing was heavy.
It was stuck on him right atthe bottom and he's like ah, ah.
And I'm like, I'm like tryingnot I don't know if his leg was
all messed up.
We're like hey, man, just wetried to get it up and then we
rocked it.
He's like stop rocking it.
I'm like all right, what's up?
We got to get more people.
Then we lifted the thing up, wepushed it up, we had enough guys
to get it off on me.
He got out from underneath thething and they called, they got
a stretcher in to like take himaway and then I just fucking

(52:40):
rent, like I high fived somebodyand then I like ran up the
trail and I kept running and ithad to be it.
It was so heavy, dude, like Iremember, like, like I literally
used like all my force to liketry to push it Right and that
had to be when the tear happened.
So at the end of the race,after like finishing, I gave
Zach a big hug and we like broedout and like cried for like a
minute and I just like, dude,we've been training for this for

(53:01):
like essentially like fouryears.
Like I mean, this started as a10 K right?
Right, it's all like, hey, Iwant to run a 10 K for my
birthday, All right, dude, I'mlike, oh shit, I can't even run
a five K.
So he's like you got twofucking weeks, Dude.
I'm like, all right, and we didit, and so it's coming, you
know, from like just a real like.
It's been a fucking journey,man.
It's a beautiful thing to sharewith one of your best friends,

(53:23):
and Rachel was great and supportus, and so she's helping us out
.
We're getting all of our stuff.
She had like a shout out toRachel Snow man, you know future
Mrs Rachel Zachary Vandeguigebecause she was the real MVP in
helping us navigate that entirerace and she had all of our
stuff ready and bags.
It was like the last thing youwant to do after an Iron man is
like collect all your shit.

(53:43):
Let me go to the registry.
Like you just want to, like, Iwant to fucking go home.
I was like crying and shit.

Jon (53:50):
I'm like I want to go home, dude, I don't want to take a
shower and go home.

Brandon (53:55):
And like taking a shower was very difficult, like
I'm like, oh, like dude, it washard to move and so, right when
I sit down, I was like in a lotof physical pain, whole bodies
in pain, and I sit down like, ah, and she's like what I'm like?
I just looked at them.
I'm like I've never had one,but I think I have a hernia.
And they started.
We all started laughing and I'mlike, okay, that sounds funny.

(54:17):
And then you know, a few days goby, I took the next day to just
rest and it's still very hardfor me to move around.
I'm in the plane.
Sitting down on the plane wastough.
I'm like picking up my baggageand like it's hurting me.
I'm like what the fuck?
Something's not right.
I go into work on Tuesday andI'm like moving around still
really stiff and they're likedamn, dude, like you.
Good, I'm like it was a toughrace and I sit down.

(54:38):
I'm like man, like I got thislike kind of like a little
bubble down here and I wasexplaining it to my coworker,
matt Murphy, and he's like, yeah, dude, so I had a friend who
had the same thing and that'scalled a hernia.

Jon (54:50):
I'm like I'm like really.

Brandon (54:51):
And then I'm like, hey, Matt, I'm like I'm in a lot of
pain.
He's like dude, go to theurgent care.
So my boss is like go to theurgent care.
And I go there.
And she's like, yep, you havean inigual hernia.
I'm like, okay, so here's $100.
What do we do?
He's like, oh, all I can do istell you that that's what it is.
I paid like $100 or somethingto verify that that's what it is
.
And then I called my doctor.

(55:12):
She said, yeah, so I'm meetingwith the surgeon on Monday.
But so, like, my belief is that, you know, I fucking had a
hernia for at least the marathonrun.
And like, yeah, I mean, butgood news is, I can still do
some walking.
I've adjusted my macros with mymentor to reflect the body that
I still want to keep and yougot it, you got us.

Jon (55:32):
Yep Ghost, you seen it, ghost, you saw it.

Brandon (55:36):
You saw it here today folks, can I just like rip that
off the fucking wall at thispoint.

Jon (55:39):
You can just pull it out.
Yeah, yeah, look at that.
Watch out for that, it'll killyou, jesus.

Brandon (55:46):
What the fuck is this anyways?

Jon (55:47):
It's old.

Brandon (55:48):
We cut back on the macros.
We're doing the necessarythings we need to do to get the
results that I want, and it'sbeen challenging.
I do want to go back to lifting, but I'm taking it.
I will be.
You know, what do we havecontrol over?
I can still walk, I can stilleat right, Still track my macros
making the adjustments, and Ibought a hernia belt.
So if anyone ever gets a herniathat's listening to this

(56:10):
podcast.
Dude, it's the fucking bestthing.
I didn't know that they hadthese and I bought one off
Amazon it's.
I'm not in any pain Like rightnow or when I walk around.
I'm not in pain.

Jon (56:19):
That's good.

Brandon (56:19):
Yeah, I'm not in pain.
Like it was really bad for thefucking first week and a half I
didn't have this belt.

Jon (56:24):
Oh yeah, I'd imagine, yeah.

Brandon (56:28):
I didn't know but, um, yeah, having like pressure on it
and stuff.
But yeah, we make it, we makeit work, we make it happen.
I'm really glad that.
I'm glad that everythinghappened the way it did.
It all worked out and honestly,it's kind of like I'm proud of
the hernia.
I got, a fucking battle woundfrom this fucking expedition.

Jon (56:41):
You know what I mean.
You put in the work, yeah, youknow, so it's uh it's good man
and you.
You helped save that dude's leg.
Oh yeah, it's like he wouldhave been fine without me, but
like you know I mean well,somebody else would have came in
to do it, right, right.

Brandon (56:55):
And luckily the dude wasn't like um he, he was like
fully cognizant where, like Idon't even know if he broke his
leg, like he got so lucky bro,this whole thing like it was
like two inches away from hishead Like he would have fucking
been dead.

Jon (57:05):
He probably would have died If he would have flipped over.

Brandon (57:08):
I don't know what he was doing, but yeah, that was
pretty wild.
So, yeah, iron man was great.
But you know, after that wasjust like for me what's next?
Right?
It's not like yay, I'm going totalk about this until I die.
It's like great.
That was a achievement, amilestone that I worked for.
Now I know that I can literallydo cause four or five years ago
.
You're fucking crazy.
You'll never do that Right.

Jon (57:30):
Yeah, I'm not much of a competition dude when it comes
to like Running, biking and shitlike that my competition lies
in like basketball, there you go, or if I play baseball this
coming year like I like, likeactual sports right.

Brandon (57:45):
Yeah, actual real sports, not like the fake sports
, not fake sports Like fake news.

Jon (57:55):
Yeah it just doesn't sell folks.
It just doesn't sell.
I love that.
So my Goal was to like dunk,right yeah, and I hit that goal
back in in March.
Granted, like I've been able todunk occasionally in the last
three to four years, but I'lldunk and then I won't be able to
for months because because Idon't know, if I just jump too

(58:18):
hard, fuck yourself up orsomething.
It's either that or I wasn'tdoing the work, for I wasn't
doing leg day plyometrics andshit like that.
So I would just have like theseweird bursts of like, yeah, I'm
gonna dunk it and I dunk it,yeah, and then I wouldn't do the
work to to maintain that, right.
But in March and April I Wasdoing the work and I was fucking
throwing it down, right, like Itook a video that I posted on

(58:42):
Instagram where I just barelygot it over there, right.
But then, dude, the next week Igo into the gym and I threw it
down ten fucking times.
Okay, like actually likesnapping the wrist, like fucking
.
Okay yeah, I was killing itright.
And then I think a month laterI hurt my knee and, like we've
been talking about, theaccountability thing.
Like over the summer, I haven'tbeen doing what.

Brandon (59:03):
I haven't been getting consistent results right.
Want to see like I was before,like you were before.

Jon (59:08):
So my my result that I want to get, instead of dunking,
dunking.
I want to be able to dunk in agame.
So if I'm playing fives againstpeople, okay, I want to throw
it down Right.
And secondly, I want to be ableto try and dunk off of one foot
Okay, because the times I havedone dunked her with two feet

(59:28):
meaning like you, jump with twofeet.

Brandon (59:30):
Jump with two feet you can jump with one foot and dunk
like a running down.
Holy shit, yeah, I'm gonna tryand get to that.

Jon (59:36):
Okay, yeah, I'm gonna see if I can do it.

Brandon (59:39):
It's gonna be tough, but I know you can do it.

Jon (59:41):
I appreciate it.
Yeah, so that that is the nextaccomplishment, physical wise,
that I need to hit.
That's cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's greatman.
Um, so I didn't skip leg day, Idid it.

Brandon (59:51):
Yeah, I've been hearing about it.
You mentioned a few times atyour legs.

Jon (59:54):
Yeah, they hurt.

Brandon (59:56):
I squeezed them a little bit, I squeeze them
quadriceps.
I squeeze you right now, butI'm just, I want to finish this
podcast.
We're gonna, I'm gonna, I'mdefinitely gonna squeeze those
again.
Dude, I'm gonna get you, Iappreciate it.

Jon (01:00:07):
You're hurting me.
It's great you know I could usea foam roller but you know, if
you pinch me, that's fine.

Brandon (01:00:14):
What's hard now is easy later so right.

Jon (01:00:17):
Um, yeah, I just love the lactic acid thing just building
up in my muscles and making me.

Brandon (01:00:21):
So if you do that consistently, you will not feel
that sore, you know?
Right, yeah, I know that thisis your punishment for fucking.
It is, it is.

Jon (01:00:28):
Another thing that I did two days ago was I was able to
go to the sauna which I was thefucking best love it.
The closest sauna at an LAfitness, which is the place I go
to, is an 18-minute drive fromhere.
Okay, the LA fitness I work at,or sorry, that I go to, is a
six-minute drive.
Okay, so I go and work out andhoop six minutes away.

Brandon (01:00:50):
God if.

Jon (01:00:50):
I wanted to go to the sauna .

Brandon (01:00:51):
I got a drive another 18, okay so is the cleanliness
of that LA fitness that both ofthem.
They're pretty good Okay.
Yeah, I had the same experienceat the LA fitness as I've been
now.
No, it actually looks like LA.
It's a fucking shithole.
Really yeah that the one inDetroit, not Detroit.
There's.
There's two.
Damn, I'm really calling thesemotherfuckers out.
There is there's one in LaVoniathat I I no longer go there,

(01:01:14):
and it was.
It was disgusting, like Iwouldn't use that fucking sauna.
It was like the whole fuckinglocker room was trashed.
Yeah, man, it's like, come on,expect, like it's not like LA
fitness, like supposed to be anice facility, but I'm glad that
you've had a good experiencethe LA fitness over here in
Elmhurst gets a little Not likedirty dirty, it gets packed
though.
Okay, so it's only a matter oftime.

(01:01:35):
There's that, like I get thestaffing shortage Like right,
it's hard to get on a little inthat job.

Jon (01:01:40):
Yeah, they don't have a sauna there though either.
Yeah, they just have.
They have a pool and stuff.
I'm gonna use the pool.
Yeah, the LA fitness over herein Oak Brook is nice Okay, yeah,
it's kept very clean.
It's huge, nice, nice court,pool and stuff, but Oak Brook
has is a very well-off area got.

Brandon (01:01:58):
You know that definitely plays a role in it,
but you're a son.
If you had a sauna that wascloser, would you incorporate
that more like?

Jon (01:02:03):
I'd go on it every day.
Okay, I would.
I would use a son every day ifI could.
You use it a lot.

Brandon (01:02:13):
Honestly, I could take more.
Went now Aiden when he'svisiting in times like, hey,
let's use a son.
I'm like shit.
Yeah, you're right, I have youknow, cuz I got that one in that
clubhouse.
It's super good for your, it'sgood.

Jon (01:02:24):
It's good for your heart too, though.

Brandon (01:02:25):
It's pretty good.
It's good for your heart.

Jon (01:02:26):
Yeah, yeah, Hube dooberman lab.

Brandon (01:02:29):
Yeah, Hube dooberman, as I was told that I kind of
look like that guy today, minusthe white beard.

Jon (01:02:33):
Yeah, I think you need 20 years of teaching at Stanford in
a white.
Yeah, you need the sleevesrolled down, but you need
tattoos underneath.

Brandon (01:02:47):
Okay, yeah, talk about something I don't know anything
about Real confident on.
But yeah, chemicals and shit,they fuck you up.

Jon (01:02:56):
Now he did.
He did mention the healthbenefits of using a sauna three
to four times a week and how itdecreases the the rate of heart
attacks and people.
I think great.

Brandon (01:03:07):
Don't quote me on that shit because I'm not like a
fact-checking dude but that isJohn's a doctor, and this is
medical advice also, didn't yousay you want to give financial
advice to everybody too?

Jon (01:03:16):
Yeah, don't spend your money.

Brandon (01:03:18):
Pretty good yeah that's good I actually know it's
actually bad advice, never mind.

Jon (01:03:22):
Here's good health advice.
It takes money to stop eatingfast food.
That's good health advice.
Good health advice, hi.

Brandon (01:03:27):
IQ.
Good financial advice.
Make more money, that's what Iwould say.
He's saying spend, I just saymake more.

Jon (01:03:33):
I would say spend less on shit you don't need Pretty good
yeah, you know well, also thenot eating a lot of fast food
and spending less money on thefast food kind of works out.

Brandon (01:03:44):
Spend less money on fast food or just don't eat it
right, yeah, okay.
That is a win.

Jon (01:03:50):
Yeah, so now we're telling people how to live there.
Welcome to the feel freepodcast where we push all of our
agendas on you.
9-11 wasn't in said job 7-11wasn't part-time.

Brandon (01:04:04):
Part-time time job.
Yeah, I actually like that.
It's a good one.
Yeah, classic mean.

Jon (01:04:10):
What else you got for the, for the listeners?
You got anything else, maybesome tips, tricks on how you got
to where you are right now andhow to kind of Push people to be
excited about changing theirlife.

Brandon (01:04:23):
Oh, how to push people to be excited, or to inspire
people, I should say, instead ofpush.
That's a really good question,john.
That's a really good questionand Thinking through it.
So how to inspire people tolive their best life man, we all

(01:04:48):
have.
We all have passions and thingsthat we love and we care about,
and If we take the time toreflect on what those are and
where we get fulfillment and westart caring about developing
and loving ourselves and wefocus on that, first the money.

(01:05:09):
The money will follow.
I there's a lot of elements tolike what makes somebody feel
like they're in a bad position,and a lot of times like that
could be financial, that couldbe we don't respect the way we
like look physical right, whichHonestly, like from from what
I've been learning anduncovering, that, first and
foremost, is like the mostimportant thing, I believe,

(01:05:31):
right, that's the foundation.
So, taking care of yourphysical health.
You mentioned eating like shit,not eating fast food.
If, if you truly want to changeand you don't like your current
situation, I'd say focus ongetting the body right,
something that you have a lot ofcontrol over.
Start the wins man, because whenyou're in a position like that,

(01:05:53):
it's easy to feel like youdon't have control over your
life.
You've outsourced control overyour life and aspects of your
life.
So Understand what you do havecontrol over and start stacking
those fucking wins.
Like it almost seems so Stupid,but this stems from, like
really having strong morningroutines, whatever that is.

(01:06:14):
Make your fucking bed, haveenough respect for yourself to
at the very least make yourfucking bed.
And it's like people like oh, Idon't want to listen to that, I
just looking for a quick hackto like because my life is in
shambles.
Like well, if you can't even dothat, you're fucked right, so do
something like listen to me,make your fucking bed.

(01:06:34):
This is what I told.
This is why I tell people makeyour bed.
Write three things you'regrateful for every morning and
Once you do that, do that for aweek, like that be the only
thing you do, like only changesmall.
Those are those little winsright there and then, once you
do that, well, I'll even say iscall me, give me a fucking call,

(01:06:55):
shoot me a message, shoot me amessage, we'll take it from
there.
You can do that, but only onlyreach out to me.
If you've made your bed for aweek straight and you've written
three things, you're gratefulfor more.
If you haven't done that, thiswould be the first fucking thing
I'm gonna ask you if you'vedone it.
If you said no, I made it, well, I made it three.
Then, motherfucker, hit me backin seven days.

Jon (01:07:17):
When you did it for seven days, you can't hire him unless
you've done it for a week.

Brandon (01:07:20):
Yeah, a hundred percent .
So do that shit for a week,shoot me a message and then we
will get you set up on a macroplan and eating plan to hit to
hit your weight goals.
And then we'll start looking atlower self, higher self,
identifying that, and then we'llcraft a mission statement
together.
So that's my, that's my plug,that's my offer right there to
the audience nice, some goodadvice right there.

Jon (01:07:41):
Hell yeah, I think we touched on a lot of good things
today.

Brandon (01:07:45):
Yeah, but we didn't get to talk about apartheid, we
didn't get to talk about thePalestinian Israeli conflict,
9-11 and a lot of other thingssold.
Next podcast we're gonna breakit down.
John loves talking aboutpolitics, politics and religion.
Yeah, so really break downexactly what's going on in the

(01:08:06):
Gaza Strip and it's just gonnabe a really good episode.
So, but we're not gonna touchthat now, so you'll have no idea
kind of what that looks likeright.

Jon (01:08:12):
So yeah, stay tuned for me to talk about a bunch of things
that I don't actually Interestme too much, in light of me
saying that it does not takeaway from the atrocities that
are happening right now.
I just the feel-free podcast isto help people feel free from
all their worst habits and vicesin order for them to chase

(01:08:34):
their dreams, and shit like that.
If you would like to listen toa political podcast, there's
probably some out there for you.

Brandon (01:08:42):
Not today.

Jon (01:08:42):
This is not the one you're looking for we're here to
inspire people to live theirbest lives.
I appreciate everybody comingout today.
I appreciate my good friendBrandon coming out to inspire
motherfuckers to live a goodfucking life.
Follow him on Instagram.
He posts some really goodcontent Analogous to making the
bed.
He does his daily meditations.

(01:09:03):
He's counting the macros.
He's posting some shit toreally Uplift your fucking
spirits.
Give him a follow.

Brandon (01:09:09):
Give him a shout out.

Jon (01:09:10):
Align your minds.
Align your minds.
I'm gonna drop that into thedescription to appreciate
everybody coming out today.
Hope you have a good rest ofyour week, start to your weekend
, or wherever the fuck you'relistening to this shit at.
So we're signing off.
Stay up and feel free.
Peace out, homies.

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