September 10, 2025 • 54 mins
From star signs to slut signs, this week Pete and Bisq-it are charting the cosmos to see who’s destined to be the biggest partiers, the most chaotic lovers, and the most feral friends. Joined by Astrologer and Tyromancer Jen Billock, who was recently profiled on People.com, our co-hosts go through wild takes on which zodiac signs thrive in the darkroom, which ones you should never share a beach house with, and how the upcoming transits and retrogrades through the end of 2025 could fuel your nightlife destiny.
After Pete and Bisq-it dive headfirst into each sign’s feral astrology, this chaotic episode on the cosmos then veers gloriously off-course into the mystical world of tyromancy — fortune-telling with cheese (yes, cheese). So whether your fate is written in the stars or in the parmesan grinder at Olive Garden, this episode proves the universe enjoys a gouda laugh while giving you one as well. Don’t worry, we brought lactaid.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
I got something now to get the people on the floor.
All right. Welcome back to all our new and
returning feral friends to fair relationship.
I'm Pete. And I'm Biscuit.
Biscuit, how the fuck are you doing?
(00:21):
You know girl, I'm doing OK. I've been reading my horoscope
lately and she's been, she's been all right, she's been all
right. We're now out of my season, so
that does hurt, but we're getting, we're inching closer to
yours. Do you have any fun birthday
plans coming up? We sure are.
Yes, we will be getting something on the books for a
nice little trip. Oh, that's right.
(00:43):
So. Trust and believe.
Once that's finally, you know, Igot a few other things I got to
cross off the list first, but that is the next thing, so I'm
excited. She is a lady with priorities,
honey. She sure is.
My God, that just never stops. I know the work is never over.
It really never is. But you know what?
This is why we live for the weekends.
We do, which I feel like we bothhave some amazing things to talk
(01:06):
about as we put our gal on the on the stove top.
Oh yes, Miss Farrell Fawcett, our trusty little tea kettle.
Well, I can certainly go fill that bitch up.
But yes, honey, the stories thatwe have to share about and after
his experience that we both had,yes, but individually, but
actually from like about a monthago when we were at Market Days
(01:26):
in Chicago, lots of ridiculousness to share.
So I can't wait. I'll go put this bitch on and
we'll get that to you, but. Let's do it.
OK Biscuit, I feel like I, I feel like we should start when
we were together, right. One of the nights that we were
out and about market days weekend, we shared an afters
(01:48):
experience. We did and we've been to this
place a few times. Well, OK, so honestly a handful
of times at this point. We've got our punch card.
You know, usually they have their shit together, right?
But I just remembered you and I gravy bacon was there.
We just had the whole buffet. Yes.
And girl, I get that things comeup, but the funniest shit was
(02:10):
that the fire alarm kept going off.
Girl, I could not because I mean, this was and we're talking
like the commercial, like building fire alarms that the
like flashing lights. Flashing lights, yes.
Girl and we were all shook because at this place too, I
think part of The Afters like license or permit they had.
(02:30):
I think they have to serve food because of the time of day.
So we were like, is shit? Is something on fire in the
kitchen? No, look, like I feel like all
of us and we got there early just because it worked out with
our schedules and stuff. It just would have been a pain
in the ass to like go home then come back.
It just didn't make sense. So we got there with like a
decent group of people kind of right when it was beginning.
And I feel like we all collectively because it happened
(02:53):
like the IT would go off and then it would stop and we think
that everything be good, but it happened like four or five.
Times. It was ridiculous.
So I'll be honest, I feel like you and I exchanged some eyes,
at least my eyes. What was going on in my head was
do we leave? Yeah.
I yeah, I mean it was like I'm not having fun anymore.
When I will say though, that like commercial sounding like
(03:14):
alarm, it almost sounded like the circuit music whistle that
like yes. And I was like, Oh my God, OK.
Well, and then Fast forward likehours.
So we decided to stay obviously and Fast forward hours later.
Every once in a while I would think I heard it looped into the
music and I'm like, no, that's just my brain being fucked up
and like not knowing what's going on.
But at this afters, I'll go 1st and then I'll pass it off to
(03:37):
you, Biscuit. But you know my good pal Bacon,
right? At one point, you know,
everyone's starting to fade. You and Gravy have left.
It's just Bacon, myself and a couple other folks.
And Bacon had told me he's, you know, going to go disappear into
the darkroom for a little bit. Pop off sis love.
It get it girl. Absolutely.
So I'm like out on the dance floor with a couple of the other
(03:58):
friends and everyone kind of starts fading away.
And so there's one other friend left and he's just like, hey,
you know, I want to make sure, you know, we're is so before I
leave. And I'm like, oh, yeah,
absolutely. And I had texted Bacon a few
times over the last like, I don't know, hour, 2 hours,
something like that, and hadn't gotten a response.
So I do a lap in the front area where the DJ's at, nothing.
I do a lap in the back in the dark room area, nothing.
(04:20):
I'm like, oh OK, little concerned and I'm.
You know she's gone rogue. It's like 7 in the morning at
this point, right? Like it has the, the time has
come where like I, my, my cognitive reasoning is not
there. It's just I'm trying to problem
solve. Yes.
So I have Bacon's location. Everything's fine.
He's there. But I'm like, but I haven't
(04:40):
heard from him. And Bacon's always really good.
If he leaves or is going to leave with somebody, always will
come and find me, let me know what's going on.
And then does it? Yeah, none of that happened.
And so I'm like, fuck, what is going?
On yeah, that's a little terrifying.
Like, yes, bitch, did she die inthe dark room?
Like, what's that smell? It's bacon.
(05:01):
She's she's overcooked. And I haven't I haven't said
this part out loud, but this is the perfect medium to do so.
I was like, Oh my gosh, maybe hedid leave and like, but lost his
phone because this a big weekend.
People take phones. Pickpocketing is happening.
Yes. So I'm like, OK, just because
his phone is here doesn't mean like everything's fine.
That's true. So I'm like, fuck, I haven't
heard from him. No one's texting back like, OK,
(05:23):
someone's taking his phone and Idon't know where he's at.
So all of those things are just happening in my head in a matter
of like 10 minutes, right? And so I decide, hey, going to
do one more lap. I do that lap.
I finally go into the darkroom and I'm like in every nook and
cranny of that darkroom. I'm like, I'm going to make sure
that he is not here before I file an Amber Alert and alert
everybody's. Phone.
Oh my God, an Amber Alert. It's going to sound like a fire
(05:46):
alarm going off in there. Exactly, exactly.
And sure enough, I get into the furthest corner of the darkroom.
There's a chair, couch, whatever, and their bacon is
just having the time of his life.
And I, you know, I didn't interrupt it, but things were,
you know, there was a moment andI looked and I go.
Well, you look at your fucking phone.
Everything was fine. When bacon is ankles to Jesus,
(06:07):
ankles to Jesus. Like, yeah, well, that's.
Good. I'm glad it's fine.
Glad. I'm glad it worked out well.
Fortunately, my my story about the experience I had for an
afters that weekend, a little less dire, but pretty fucking
interesting. Yeah, in a few different ways.
So the very last night, Sunday night, went to one of the
(06:29):
circuit mom circuit parties. I got invited on party full and
we love our party full invites sure do to go to an afters that
began at 4:00 AM Love. Now the circuit party went until
6:00 AM and in the afternoon we received one of those text
blasts that said, hey, we're going to kick things off at 5:00
AM. So we're like, OK, that makes
(06:51):
sense. Just so it like ramps up before
the party fully ends. So we decide Gravy and I to
leave at 5:00 just to because wehad to take an Uber to get
there, but it gave you instructions with the apartment
number. Check in at the front desk.
They'll let you up. Just say who you're here to see.
OK, cool. Love it.
So we get there. It's now probably like 5:15,
(07:14):
5/20. And before I even get to the
check into the front desk, the door person says, oh, are you
here for apartments 402? And I was like, oh, why yes, I
am. And they're like, oh, OK, we'll
go on up. Oh, wait, just give me your
first name. And I was like, oh, OK, it's
(07:34):
Biscuit. And they let me on up one word,
no questions asked. I was like, I thought there
would be a little bit more of like a trial or something.
Like a screening. Yes, something yes.
So I get up there hallway reminds me of a psychiatric
ward. First of all, when we get off
there just dark quiet, the light, light buzzing of like the
(07:56):
like electric and I was just like, oh, this is a little
creepy, but the hallway is quietas fuck.
So I'm like what's going on? Well, the door was the last one
at the very end of the hallway. Walk up, turn the door handle,
doors unlocked. I'm like great.
Party started. Well, bitch, we walked in,
nobody was home. Absolutely nobody was home.
(08:17):
Like we did a whole lap and it was quiet.
All the lights were on. I was like, did the apocalypse
happen? Was there like the the Christian
reaping? They were all just holy prayers
or something. I don't know God, but it was
abandoned. And we were like, this is I
think a sign from the universe. It's it's time we end the
(08:38):
festivities and just call. It it's time to go, it's time.
To go. And I thought that was already,
you know, a decent hilarious experience until Gravy had just
recently joined an improv class and he had his first class just
after the market Days weekend. And he had had participated in a
(09:01):
couple of different scenes, likewith the various people in the
class. And a guy comes up to me and
goes, hey, I'm sorry, but I justgot to say you look really
familiar. And he goes, did you happen to
show up at like 5:00 in the morning at this building?
And he was like, I was the door person.
And I was like, are you fucking kidding me?
(09:25):
Stop just dead dad. He was the actually the door
person that day. He's like.
That is, he was like, yeah, there's.
A big gaggle that just like showed up all in one big wave
and he's like, it's like 6 in the morning.
Don't these people have jobs? Not on market days, weekend,
baby. Yeah.
No, honey, I mean, you got to keep in mind it was Monday
morning now, so I remember I waslike waiting for the Uber on the
(09:49):
way home after this love, after meeting this lovely improv class
attendee, I'm standing outside waiting for the Uber and I swear
to God I had two runners run past me and I was like, fuck my
life. But you know what, honey?
I just got just as many steps inas those bitches did.
Dance in my little tush off all night.
Honey, it was worth it was worthit.
(10:10):
But. So.
Funny. Here Did I see you at 6:00 AM on
a Monday looking for an orgy? I think so.
Well, look at that. And there she is, and there is
Miss Farrell. I'll just go ahead and grab her
up. I'm excited to talk to Jen and
talk all about astrology and something may be a little
cheesy, I don't know. Oh Jesus, here we go.
Here we go. Let's get it.
(10:35):
Well, Pete, today I'm super excited to welcome to the show
an astrologer and a tyromancer. And I know many of our listeners
probably have no freaking clue what that is.
So we are very excited to hear from Jen and Jen to shed some
light on the cosmos and all thatit does to bring out the most
feral sides of us. Welcome to fair relationship.
(10:58):
Thank you. Yay.
Happy to help me. Yes, there's that Leo energy.
As we record, I believe your birthday is tomorrow actually
correct. My birthday is tomorrow.
I'm going to get a very decadentcake and then eat cheese that
some cakes. Yes.
Maybe I'll have champagne, yeah.I mean cheesecake is my
(11:21):
favorite, so to me honestly those the combination of the two
works. I mean, it's pretty good.
Well, tell you what, Jen, just to kind of kick us off, if you
wouldn't mind, just introducing yourself a little bit to tell us
about your history with astrology and tyromancy, and
then we'll kind of dive right into the chaos of the episode.
Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.
So I am Jen, as we've learned. So I have been doing astrology
(11:46):
in some form or another sense since I was a teenager a long
time ago. Yeah.
It started with me just reading a lot of books about Leos
because clearly we are the superior sign.
No offense. Well, as a fellow Leo, I can
attest this is true. This is.
(12:07):
True. And then I got into doing birth
charts for people. When I asked my husband where he
was born and what time he was born, he was like, what are you
doing? Nothing, nothing, nothing.
It's fine. It's fine.
Just just. Go with it, babe.
And then I got tired of everybody talking about how much
Mercury retrograde is causing them to do stupid things.
(12:30):
And so I wrote a book about retrogrades, about how to deal
with the energy. OK.
And how timely given that we just got out of Mercury
retrograde and I know we've got several other retrograde
chromium process. Now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the tyromancy.
Tyromancy, if you don't know about it now, know about it
before you know about it now it is fortune telling with cheese.
(12:53):
I have been doing divination fortune telling since I was.
I've always been like this. And the cheese was a pandemic
project and now it's become a thriving workshop business.
A delicious one. Yes, two things I'll add to
that, Jen. Number one, I love that you very
much subscribe to the Born This Way anthem.
(13:15):
We very much here do too as well.
So Miss Gaga. But two, that's also how I came
to meet you. Through cheese that's.
Right, one of your entire romance experiences.
And it was, guys, when we get toit, I'll share some stories, but
it was crazy in the best of ways, so.
Good, I'm glad you weren't like that was total shit.
(13:36):
I know, Yeah. The holding of your breath,
you're like, wait, where's this going?
Where's this going? It was some stinky cheese.
We did have some stinky cheese but I ate it up anyway so loved
it. Excellent, Jen, Maybe the
retrogrades are a perfect place to start because this year has
been a year of crazy retrogrades.
I mean, I feel like every planethas been at some point this year
(13:59):
maybe, but it's been kind of a, you know, a colossal set of
chaotic planets. So would love your thoughts.
Just kick us off there, yeah? Yeah, it could stop.
That would be rad. Stop, please.
Yeah, If we could just go ahead and stop doing that, that'd.
Be great. I know.
Like even though we're out of Mercury retrograde, we're still
in the shadow period, which somepeople will say is even more
(14:20):
intense than the retrograde itself.
So good. You guys can't see me, but my
face is melting. Like literally melting.
And for the shadow period. So I've heard of these before,
but how long do they last on either side?
Like what? What does it look like?
It depends on the planet and where they are.
(14:41):
For Mercury, I can't remember exactly.
I think that's like a week or two weeks.
I don't know some. Someone will probably yell at
you in comments or something if I'm wrong.
So there. It's before and after.
Come at us, bro. Like, let's go.
Yeah, we got your back, Jen. Thank you, I love to be
corrected. Well, so just like let's dive
(15:04):
into straight into the fun then.So now that we've got Mercury
retrograde behind us, you know, we got just the the tail end of
summer, yeah, right and left ahead of us.
I know people are going to be excited to get out and enjoy the
chaotic fun that still remains before the the cold of winter.
So who should we look to? What signs are those that are
(15:27):
going to be the ones that stand out, that throw the wildest
parties that are going to be growing up in the I want it.
I want all the tea. All the tea, all the cheese, all
of it, you know. Yeah, well, obviously Leos will
throw the wildest parties. Yeah.
Everything is going to come backto Leos.
Like we just, we own it, you know?
Yes. Yeah, right.
(15:49):
Yeah. So, Jen, kind of, you know, in
true Leo's spirit, Leo's helpingLeo's here.
Oh my God I am tired of all of these Leo's I my Libra self.
I can't take not being in the spotlight, so I'm gonna need you
both to stop. But Jen, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I
want you to talk yourself up a little bit because you were also
recently featured in People's magazine, right?
(16:10):
Or People Magazine's website. Yeah, yeah.
I don't know if it's gonna be inprint, but yeah, People magazine
did a feature about me and my cheese.
It's fortune telling. And now my nephew thinks I'm
famous and I don't, I don't correct him.
Yes, you know, people, people recognize me in Chicago.
And I was telling my husband theother day that like, I love it,
but also it kind of sucks because now I have to drive
(16:32):
better. Cuz it's like if someone shows
up to one of my workshops and they're like, you cut me off,
you shouldn't. And I'm gonna be like, well
don't drive like an asshole you.Are and that is why you're on
the show, my friend, and we're thrilled to have you.
Yeah, have you noticed that everyone that has a sports team
custom license plate drives likea Dick?
No, but I'm going to look for itnow.
(16:52):
Do not get those custom plates. Yeah, it's very clear.
Support the athletics. You know, we, we have played gay
kickball here, so that, but I think that's more or less the
extent of our sportiness. I I like to consider myself an
athletic supporter. Yeah.
I was just going to say wow. Yeah, yes, yeah, yeah.
(17:12):
Sure. So Jen, for those that might be
relatively new or just exploring, you know, the side of
astrology. So let's start off with the
world of astrology real quick. And it talked to us like what
are the main alignments or positions or you know, like that
we hear about the sun, we hear about the moon.
I talked about positions. Did you love that?
(17:34):
My God, that tells you with my mind goes Pete calling me out.
So with that, just shed just a brief little light on that
before we dive into some of the the party fun behind the signs
that are. Yeah, absolutely.
So the sun, obviously your sun sign is your main Zodiac sign.
(17:55):
The moon is like your inner self, and it's kind of like the
the Catholic mother of your of your soul.
OK, haven't, haven't been raisedCatholic.
Our listeners know. Yep, Yep, very well.
She's recovering. Yeah, still we're making it
through. Yep.
Mm, hmm. Long road of recovery.
(18:17):
The rising is a lot of it is howyou present yourself to others,
but it also has a nice interplaywith your, with your sunshine.
So they, they all work together,you know, And then the Venus and
the Mars of you is your hotness,essentially, yes, Your, your
sexiness. And then how long you can carry
(18:39):
on that sexiness. You're fighting, you're fighting
energy here. So yeah.
OK, OK. Well, do you want me to liken
them to party persona? On what this means, please,
please, I'm begging you, OK? So your sun sign, and we can get
(18:59):
into the specific signs in a minute, but I'll just do the
sun, moon and rising in Venus and Mars.
So your sun sign is the confidence that you're feeling
on the dance floor. So this podcast gets like racy,
right? Oh yes.
Sure. OK, So I can say like, if you're
out there, like shaking your tits, like it's totally, yeah.
Please, I'd be offended you seenme on Saturday.
(19:21):
Fabulous. You should have seen me earlier
today. No for real though, like OK side
note, sorry I get distracted easily so.
No, you're in good company. So my office window looks right
out onto our little front stoop and my husband was walking up
after doing something in the cars and I knocked on the window
and I'm like what? It's just flashing in through
(19:44):
the window. It was fun.
So exactly. So the sun is your confidence on
the dance floor, how you feel putting yourself out there and
the energy that you're exuding. Your moon, like I said, it's
your Catholic mother. It's gonna be how guilty you
(20:05):
feel the next day for all this shit that you did.
Your rising sign is like the energy that you have when you
walk in the door. So the people that come flock to
you because of this vibe that you're giving off.
Like you've got the best outfit and you walk in and everybody's
like, Oh my God, yeah, the best.And then the Venus and Mars for
(20:25):
Venus and to say how many peopleyou like do The Dirty dancing
reactions with re enactions. Funny story.
So yes. And I were in Puerto Vallarta
earlier this year. We did this big beautiful boat
trip day and we were like on this boat with a bunch of
miscellaneous parties that we did not expect were going to be
(20:46):
on it. Yes, including like very
conservative Mormons. God bless them.
They definitely were exposed to a lot of homosexuals and speedos
and thongs that day. In a very short amount of time,
very short amount of. Time this was like an all
inclusive drinks involved and soby the end of the day we are
feeling pretty good and somebodyturned on The Dirty Dancing song
(21:11):
and I and the this woman like and I are out there dancing and
she runs at me and there is video footage of this that I
have to show you there is and somehow we were all terrified.
I was going to like, launch her off the boat, but somehow
miracles happen. I was recording it.
I was recording it happened. And literally as she goes to run
to Biscuit, I'm like, Oh my God,he he's gonna, they're both
(21:35):
going overboard because it was right at the front of the boat
where there's like all this rope, you know, type material
where you're just laying in sunbathing.
And that's where he decided to just put her up into the
position. And I go, oh, well, we're just
going to get a little top heavy and they're both going down.
They're both going down. We're yelling Timber Ke$ha's
going to come in like it's the this is the end.
Of the rope. But he did the lift.
(21:56):
No one fell ever in the lift. I surprised.
At the lift. The confidence alcohol gives.
You, that is hilarious. Oh, I was in LA and we were
walking down the street and there was some like shop like
storefront just having this random party.
I mean, it was probably planned.I don't know.
We randomly happened on it and everybody was like, oh, that
(22:17):
looks like fun. And I'm just like, yeah, let's
dance our way in. So we like danced our way into
this party and they let us in and then some guy started trying
to like swing dance with me. I am so uncoordinated, but he
twirled me around and the strap of my dress broke.
Oh my God. Oops.
Fell out and I was. Just like.
Enjoy everyone around. My neck.
(22:38):
You have like a full Janet Jackson.
Moment. Oh my gosh.
Yeah, it's. Amazing.
So, OK, so I think so we spoke about the Venus.
What was the Mars, Jen? Yes, the Mars.
So not only is it your stamina, but it's also like who you're
who you're reaching for. So like who are you buying the
drinks for? It's, you know, it's, yeah, it's
(23:01):
you reaching out and taking, taking what you want,
essentially with consent, with consent, with consent, yes.
So if we were to take those and then like try to apply them to
various signs, like how would you go about the various
archetypes if you. Yeah, I can go through the
Zodiac signs and I've got a party persona for each of them
(23:25):
and I've got the like, good things and the shit things that
they do. Party.
Sign I. Cannot wait.
I put a lot of research into this cuz.
It was very. Fun, yes.
So, OK, OK, so Aries, Aries is gonna be the dance starter, so
they're the one out on the dancefloor first.
OK, That is their persona. Now, however, they will suggest
(23:49):
a contest of some sort, a drinking contest, a dance
contest, a whatever contest. And then they may lose.
And then they're gonna whine about it for the rest of the
night. Sure, sure makes.
Sense that's the that's the Aries vibe.
Taurus. They really like familiar
things, so they're only gonna want to dance to songs that are
familiar to them. They're gonna be like, Bring Me
(24:11):
My Britney, and then they're gonna be out on the floor.
This makes so much sense for people I know already.
I'm like, this is crazy. Taurus will also offer to buy a
round for everyone, but then they're going to want to be in
charge of what drink everyone gets.
So everybody gets Akka soda that's.
(24:31):
It I'm getting the round, I'm getting the round, but I decide.
Yes. Gemini, my husband is a Gemini,
very clearly a Gemini husband. If you listen to this, I love
you very much, but you are such a Gemini.
The Gemini is the party spot fixture.
So every club, every dance, whatever, ever, the regular,
they're the regular. But here's the thing, they have
(24:53):
lots of these connections, but nothing too deep because they're
afraid to open up. Wow, OK.
Yeah, so they love like it's theduality of the Gemini, like they
love getting to that point. But then and I see a connection
that could be a big one, and they're like, oh God, Oh no,
I've I've shown to myself too much.
(25:14):
I gotta go, yeah. Exactly, exactly.
The cancer of the group is the bartending therapist.
Not. Necessarily the bartender, but
they're the ones that you would talk to.
So you think about when you go to a bar, you won't talk to the
bartender about all your problems.
So they are good for having sideconversations off to the side.
(25:36):
They're going to listen to you, they're going to be emotionally
invested, but then they're goingto be jealous when you give that
attention to someone else. This tracks.
This tracks. This tracks.
I know I'm I was thinking of my cancerian friends when I wrote
this. And we love you, girlies.
It's nothing against. You no love you just as much.
(25:58):
Yes, one of my nearest and dearest is an incredible cancer
and I love her so much. Actually, my college bestie is a
cancer. So true.
Okay, so Leos, the best sign. Interesting take.
We are take but go on. We are obviously the diva.
(26:19):
Clearly. We're the diva of the party.
We come in in the outfit, we command the attention, you know,
that kind of thing. We're the life of the party,
which is the good thing, but we also think we are the party, so.
This is also. Like this is me being a power
(26:39):
bottom of the orgy. Yes, yes, this tracks.
Yes. So I know I am the part of your
scenes, yeah. Yeah, yeah, you should best get,
you should feel seen. Yes, I cosign on.
All of that. I laughed really hard when I
wrote this one. I was like, this is so me.
All right, So Virgo, you are theorganizer, so you are planning
(27:03):
the orgy. However, you are leaving before
it becomes too complicated because you don't want to deal
with that that shit. And an orgy.
It could be quite literally. So you gotta be, yeah.
Yeah, you gotta, you know, stop.Please visit episode 7 of Season
2 Oopsie Poopsie for best tipsy tricks and how to manage that.
(27:25):
Absolutely, absolutely. Wait.
I love that though. The Virgo's like, hey, I'll do
the groundwork. I will.
I will. I'll start this.
But if it's getting too much like, hey, you know what?
This is not what I signed up for, so I'm gonna go.
Yeah, not here for the drama. OK.
And then Libra is the one that might be causing the drama.
(27:47):
Oh yes. So the Libra, their party
persona is really to make sure everyone is having a great time.
They want everyone to have fun. That's which is very true.
This is Pete. However, they will not only
bring their partner to the party, they will also bring
(28:08):
their frenemy to the party, everyone's frenemy to the party.
So. Causing a little bit of drama
here. Stir the pot.
Stirring the pot? Yeah.
Just just for funsies. Just for funsies, Yeah.
But hey, everybody's gonna have a good time.
Supposedly. We'll all walk away with
stories, at least. Yeah, I mean, if my ex-husband
(28:30):
showed up, we would have a greattime burning the place down.
So. But would it be memorable?
Best memory of my life so the Scorpio and.
I know lots of Scorpio Scorpio. Is me too this I'm ready.
The Scorpio is on a me journey. So they're there for themselves.
They are there to work some things out to get through the
(28:52):
how do I want to call it the insanity of the of the Scorpio.
So they they're on the me journey and then they like to
try all of the drinks. So everyone is having a drink.
They're going to try all of themand then they're going to go
pick a fight with their ex. Yep, that'll do it.
(29:13):
This I know somebody who is a Scorpio who always picks a fight
just as you suggested and the. The only unsolicited Dick pics
I've ever gotten have been from Scorpios.
Oh my God. Oh my God. 100% from Scorpios
(29:33):
every single time. I'm sorry, I was not ready for
that, but I love that. I mean, I don't love that, but
you know what I mean? I mean, I wasn't that upset.
Like it was a pretty good Dick. So, OK, yeah, it's a nice
support. Just in pictures because I'm
happily married. I had no interest but I was just
like, well that is a well formedpenis right there.
(29:55):
You know, but, but you gotta watch the live photos.
That's the tip. You gotta watch the live photos.
For the tip. That's a good point.
Yeah, right. OK, let's go to Sagittarius.
They are the party hopper, so they will go from party to party
to party. They're the friend that stays
out all night long. But then their problem is that
(30:16):
they don't know when to stop, soeveryone else is going home and
they're just like, no, let's keep partying, let's go, let's
go into someone's house. Yes.
Biscuit. Yeah, Biscuit.
Now I'm like, do I have some Sagittarius in me that I don't
know about because I don't know when to stop?
This is true. I've been there, I've been
there. Do you know what you're rising
is? Yeah, it's not that, but hey.
(30:37):
I think we can all embody parts of these.
Absolutely. I usually embody them by them
being in my body, you know what I mean?
Correct. Of course.
I mean, that's the right way to do it, you know, So, so
Capricorn is the one that parties the hardest.
They're the now that may be true, but they strategically
(30:59):
pick their partners at the partyand then leave them on red.
So they kind of disappear. And as somebody who has had
quite a bit of experience with aCapricorn in a relationship,
this is absolutely true. As a read.
Yeah, Capricorn, my ex-boyfriendwe've nicknamed the Home
(31:21):
Wrecker. So you know, Capricorns are
crazy is. Clutching her pearls.
All right, Aquarius. My dad is an Aquarius.
Bacon's an Aquarius. Definitely tracks for him.
So the Aquarius is the helper. They want to help do everything.
They're the joiner, they want to, they want to be there.
(31:43):
But they also they'll dance withyou but then tell you how you
were dancing wrong. They want to correct your moves.
Yes, yes, this is like a perfectread of my Aquarius friends.
I love you guys. Honey, that's amazing.
That is perfection actually. Can you actually, can you fix
(32:06):
this thing that you were just messing up, please?
Thank you. Yeah, right.
Oh gosh, my dad, the Aquarius, his favorite saying one of them
is why is there always never enough time to do it right the
first time, but always enough time to do it right the second
time? And I'm like, because you
haven't told anyone exactly how to do it the first time.
(32:27):
Oh my gosh, Papa Aquarius comingin with the tea.
Yeah. Yeah.
And then lastly is Pisces. They are the makeup artist.
They make everyone feel gorgeousbefore you go out.
They make partners feel magical and then they get bored and they
(32:51):
just wander away to find someoneelse to make feel beautiful.
Like leaving, leaving glitter everywhere.
Like just, oh, I'm gonna go overhere and do this and that's all
right. Well, I'm done and I'm gonna go
over here. Pisces is the glitter bomb.
The glitter, Yeah. Yes, yeah, I love.
That. Oh my God, this kind of just
(33:12):
gave us like a Zodiac menu, likea choose your own adventure of
like how you want to party, withwho, what's the mood, what's the
vibe? I fucking love it.
Biscuit I'm imagining now that we have this, you know, choosing
the vibe that we want when we'reout on a weekend.
Like is this thing on? I'm looking for a Pisces
tonight. Pisces.
(33:32):
Do we have any Pisces in the building?
Please find me in the corner. Dark room preferably.
Thank you so much. Yes.
Do you want me to type these up for you and send them?
Oh yes, we will post them take. A dart, Print it out.
Take a dart, throw it at the wall.
Yes, today we're going with a Libra and a Capricorn.
Yes, Oh my gosh. I also love like if you go on
(33:54):
like a group trip, you could almost like figure out like
triangulate some of the vibes that could work and whatnot.
So interesting. Biscuit.
That would actually be super funny.
If we like paired up who we've gone on a couple of trips with
recently and like what type of trip it was based on, that would
be funny. Oh my God, let's do it.
Let's absolutely do it. Oh my God, this.
Is like the start of a Nine Perfect Strangers episode.
(34:17):
Yes, and I'm a piece with that. So you know, as we look ahead to
the rest of the year and obviously we've got the various
signs, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, sagging and Cap Canada and the
year Cap being Capricorn, Sorry,I'm hip to the group guys.
But obviously the cosmos kind ofcontinue to move like the
(34:38):
positions of the stars and, and maybe even like their points of
intersection or how they engage with each other also evolve and
I believe these are called transits or aspects.
Exactly. Right.
Can you talk to us a little bit about what those are, what they
mean, how they change, what are the some common ones, just
general themes? Yeah.
So transit is a planet that is moving across your chart.
(35:02):
So it's just the way that your particular birth chart is
interacting with the orbit of different planets and that is
really reflecting your current emotions and how you are
reacting to things. Aspects are the angles between
planets and your birth chart. There are some that are hard,
some that are not so hard, and this is how your planets
(35:28):
interact to form your personality.
OK. So yes, and so that's how all of
the aspects in your chart kind of lean into, you know, who you
are as a human being. That's why we all have like the
sun, the moon, the rising, the descending, that kind of thing.
So. Yes.
So cuz I've I've heard of conjunctions, which I believe is
(35:48):
is that is that when they're like directly in the heart of
the other one and then I believethere are trines.
Yeah, sextiles, yeah. So trine sextiles conjunction.
Junction. Junction.
What's your function? That's immediately where I went,
so yeah. Yay.
So there are some major transitsfor the rest of the year, some
(36:09):
retrogrades coming up, so I can talk about that a little bit.
Yeah, there is a lunar eclipse on September 7th in Pisces.
This is going to be a very emotional lunar eclipse,
September 7th. September 7th.
So if you have never cried afterhaving sex, you probably will.
September. Let's see when Pluto is
(36:34):
currently retrograde and that isthrough October 13th.
Pluto is one of the big planets and it's it's intense.
So this is the return of old partners.
So if you feel like people from your past have been kind of
popping up lately, you have Pluto to thank for this.
Oh fuck you, Pluto. Right.
(36:57):
And then in September, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto are all
retrograde. So we already talked about
Pluto. These are the big planets.
So these are the ones that govern like the big things like
politics and like all of the like major wars and things like
that, right? So I will encourage you to
choose your outings wisely when Uranus, Neptune and Pluto are in
(37:22):
retrograde grain. Ohh.
God are retrograde isn't. You know it's not actually
correct to say in retrograde. It's just is retrograde how it
is. I had to edit myself when I was
writing my book 'cause I kept screwing it up.
Ohh. You're making me.
I'm, I'm nervous. I'm a little nervous, but you
know what? I mean, it'll be OK.
It'll be fine. We're just gonna live, laugh,
love ourselves, our our way through it.
(37:42):
Yeah, yeah, You know what? Here's the thing, right?
It doesn't matter what is going on astrologically as long as you
are living your truth and being who you are supposed to be and
getting consent and. Consent.
Yes. Snag Baby.
So as we're coming into Scorpio season, it's a very mischievous
(38:06):
season, you know, go ahead, sendsend your Dick pics to people.
But with. Consent with consent.
With consent, it's gonna be a fun time.
Scorpio season, things get wild.Yeah, cuz that's, I mean,
Halloween falls in Scorpio season, right?
Yep, Halloween is the very middle of Scorpio season.
(38:28):
Yes. Mischief.
That's why it is it is crazy. It is on fire.
You get, yeah, you get in some costume, Dick pics, all of it,
yes. This is like darkroom parties.
Yes, Turn all the lights off, see where things go, you know?
So everybody lean into Scorpio season.
It's gonna be a blast. We do have another Mercury
(38:51):
retrograde coming. Oh no.
I know this. This one was horrendous.
So Mercury retrograde is going to be November 9th.
Now remember the shadow period before that?
Sometimes a little bit worse. So yes, that's right.
You can expect drama. You can expect people not
responding to your text messages.
So all those hookups, all those hookups you had on Halloween.
(39:13):
On Halloween, they're gonna ghost you.
They're gonna ghost you. They're gone.
They might ghost you, but maybe not on purpose.
So you never know, because it's so many technological problems,
communication problems, you know, somebody's gonna call you
an Uber and they're gonna drop you off 8 miles from where you
live, something like that, you know?
Just a minor kidnapping, no big deal.
Ever couple more things. There's a Jupiter and Saturn
(39:37):
retrogrades in November. These are classified as social
planets, so there could be some arguments coming up in the
friend group, some disagreementsabout where to go, what to do,
and how to do it. So be prepared for that.
There's gonna be trouble at the Thanksgiving table, honey.
Friendsgiving on fire. That's right.
(39:57):
That's right. So besides.
The birthday kiddos, Are there any other signs that stand out
as being potential main character energies?
It's pretty much always fire signs.
We just, we just can't help it. We are the party, remember, and.
Which are sorry? Which are the fire signs?
(40:19):
Aries, Leo and Sagittarius. But I also feel like Capricorn
is gonna have themselves quite the time.
So yeah, I mean, look, look out for Capricorn.
They come out of the woodwork and they throw down all.
Right caps. That that could that could mean
a good time. Yeah.
So then if we think outside of the main characters, are there
(40:42):
any that we should just like stay the fuck away from or or
any any are there any connections perhaps between
various signs of like, maybe that's not a good combo because
we're also coming up to the coldseason, so it's going to be
nesting time soon. Sure, 100%.
Capricorn, you know, they're, they can be a little flighty.
(41:05):
So I mean, if you put a Cancer in a Capricorn together, they
might have a great time, like, you know, forgetting the other
person is there and still being happy.
But I would not put them with someone who is aiming for the
stability that we want from likethe cozy cuddle season.
So probably not going to want them with a Cancer.
(41:27):
And then, you know, a Cancer in Libra have to be careful too,
because Libra can be kind of dramatic.
No, it's not always as balanced as you think, but.
You don't say. Livery can be kind of dramatic.
Cancer will get irritated. Solid.
Let's see. Yeah.
(41:47):
I think just like generally firesigns and air signs do well
together, water signs and earth signs do well together.
But it's interesting because some water signs, like I really
vibe with them as a fire sign. So, you know, it can change.
You know, don't be with someone who's going to go against what
you want to do. Like not saying that you
(42:10):
shouldn't compromise or whatever, but like if you want
someone who's like always there,don't pick someone who's going
to go out every night and leave you alone by yourself.
Yes. And listen to your intuition
because your intuition is also very in tune astrologically
because it's all energy, right? And if your intuition is being
like that person is skeezy, likeget away from that person.
(42:31):
You do not need them. Listen to your heart.
So true. Well, and I just had a
connection of course, like I Libra is an air sign.
How am I supposed to breathe with no air?
Jordan sparks, You know what I mean?
Like it's just all making sense to me right now.
Like the energy, the air. Bitch, I'm getting on touch
tunes. We are going out.
I am locking down that karaoke list at the bar.
(42:53):
We are doing it honey. Do not skip.
Ahead, touch tunes. Ohh, my gosh, it is like a a
jukebox that you can like you have there's an app that you can
download and then you can request songs in the app.
Yeah, modern day jukebox. Yes, yeah, but you can like pay
extra to skip and so and you cango in the app and find where
they're at too. And I'm absolutely gone in and
(43:15):
you can just take over. Funny story about that,
actually. I was on a bachelor party trip.
We were down in Flora Bama. I've heard about it, yes.
It is familiar. Exactly like what you have heard
about, but we took a party bus one day and this party bus ended
up like breaking down and we ended up at this bar called The
(43:38):
Keg. You walk in, there's no windows,
There's thick wall of smoke because they could smoke inside.
And you know, I saw this background screen on their phone
was the Confederate flag. And I was like, I don't think
I'm welcome here. I don't you know, this is not,
this is not great. No.
But they had a touch tunes. And so, honey, it became a gay
bar real fast. Let me tell you, I was playing
(44:02):
Cher, I was playing Britney, I was playing Dua, I was playing
Whitney. I even played RuPaul's Kitty
Girl. It was amazing.
And I I favored it on my app so that I could always just
randomly drop in the gayest songfrom thousands of miles away.
It's amazing. Stop.
It warms my heart. That is my perfection.
(44:23):
I love fabulous my friend and I went to.
I would say that she is someone I have a fair relationship with.
We went to, we went, we went to karaoke at the sports bar in the
suburbs of Chicago and it was like a full of like the douche
Bros, you know, like the sports douche Bros.
(44:44):
And I love sports but I'm not a douche Bros so.
Athletic Supporter. Athletic.
Supporter. Yes, the bad athletic
supporters. So we took over the karaoke and
did only Disney songs, all Disney songs, all night.
It was amazing. And there were like little kids
(45:05):
coming up and singing with us every now and then.
And we'd be like, yeah, we wouldtry to pull in like the dude
Bros. I'm like no my thing.
Oh my God, love it. Love.
It and we're like, haven't you ever dreamed about being part of
our world? Yes, Oh my gosh.
Well, Pete, I, I think it could be a little fun, Jen, if you're
(45:27):
up for it, of course, to maybe like if we threw out some like
just miscellaneous party personas or archetype or or what
have you. I like this.
Let's do it. Yeah, I think the first one that
comes to my mind, Biscuit, we talk about this type of person a
lot. We see them out at the parties.
A demon twink for. Example.
Oh my God. So you know Jen, you know the
(45:50):
demon twink really is exactly what it sounds.
That's a Scorpio for sure. This this is this Rings crew.
Yep, Yep, Yep. I No, no, no.
No. OK I I want to know who's the
person that is most likely to take over the Spotify playlist?
(46:11):
Well, I think that's a Leo. Oh damn.
Oh he's so close. I thought for sure cuz Pete does
this all the time. He walks in.
He's like a little QR code. I'd like to join the jam.
I'd like to join the jam please.Yeah, but Pete, you've you've
got 2 Leos in your. In your chart I do Libra, Leo
Leo so it makes sense. I mean it's.
(46:33):
There. Yeah.
And I'm Leo, Leo Libra. So all of us would do it.
Yes and so karaoke actually thatmakes perfect sense and and my
wow, I really did just that's a self fulfilling prophecy.
I just did there, didn't it? Also very Leo me Sure it's about
me never. OK.
What about, you know, this kind of party adjacent, But I would
(46:54):
say like, like a sugar daddy, right?
So like, somebody's coming to the party, like wanting to do
all of the things and pay for everything.
Yeah. I'm going to say that this could
be an Aquarius. It could be.
Now I think some people might disagree with me, but but they
(47:18):
they love to be in people's business.
They do. I'm like, they sure do baby.
Yeah, and I mean like. Yeah, OK.
I love that. Who's most likely going to be
the one that's just Queen of theDarkroom?
How many times can I answer Leo?Oh my.
(47:39):
Gosh. No, this would be, I think I'm
going to say Aries for this one.Oh, OK, Yep.
They're a RAM for a reason. OK.
OK. So sorry, on the flip side of
that, who's like darkroom not going anywhere near it, not the
vibe. Absolutely.
Probably cancer. They're too emotional.
(48:01):
I get so emotional, baby. Oh yes.
Strings are definitely attached with the cancer.
Got it. This has been a ton of fun, and
I've certainly have learned a lot about astrology and all the
signs, and certainly now we'll be tapping specific friends for
different avenues of adventures,if you will.
Absolutely. We'll be creating a roster at
(48:22):
this point, Basket. Like we'll be like, you know
what? Yeah.
What type of night are we tryingto have?
We better. Oh, excuse me, cancer.
You're staying home. Yeah.
If you, if you ever like, put all the signs in a hat and then
pull them out to decide who you go out with, you have to let me
know. Oh, absolutely, yes, we'll
spill. I want to know how it goes.
Oh, my gosh. But I want to back briefly to
(48:45):
something we talked about at thestart of the episode.
That is another area of specialty that I think not many
of our listeners are probably very familiar with.
But again, that you were featured in people's website all
about tyromancy. So Jen, clue us in.
Yeah. What is tyromancy?
What's history of it? What the hell is cheese fortune
(49:07):
telling? So Tyra Mancy is the art of
telling fortunes with cheese. It dates back to the 2nd
century, was the first recorded mention of it.
It was really most popular in the agrarian societies with a
lot of cows and goats and sheep and, you know, just the animals
that you can milk. Makes sense.
Yeah, with a good cheese climate.
So, like, nothing super arid, although they do have their own
(49:29):
cheese. I just don't like it that much.
No offense but like camel cheeseis supposed to be disgusting.
Oh my God, I can imagine they'resupposed to like, use horrible
smelling as it is. I can imagine what's coming out
of them. Right.
So the way that you do cheese fortune telling is you look at
the surface of the cheese and the variations in it and then
you basically do divination fromit.
You tell a story based on what you see.
(49:51):
You can use literally any kind of cheese, even vegan cheese.
I've used Kraft singles. I have used blue cheese
dressing. What?
Yeah, I was in Wisconsin, I think I was in Madison, and
everybody got cheese at the table and they had me go around
and do everybody's cheese. And then the last guy was like,
I have a salad but my dressing is blue cheese.
(50:15):
So I read his salad and blue cheese dressing and it was
accurate. So yeah.
I love that. So can you give us examples
like, yeah, are there any thingsthat stand out from readings
where people were like, holy shit, that was unbelievable.
Like any anything. Yes.
So I did one reading where I waslooking at this piece of cheese
(50:37):
and I saw a plane, like an imageof a plane.
And then I swear to God, I saw the outline of the state of Iowa
and I was like, I don't know whythis is, but you're going to
Iowa soon. And this woman told me that she
had a trip planned to Iowa in two weeks.
Oh my gosh. And I was like oh that's crazy.
(50:58):
And then there was another time where I saw the shape of a dog,
but it had like a little film ofcheese over the dog shaped hole.
And then next to it, the cheese said the word Bunny.
And I said, OK, so I'm seeing a dog, which means that there's a
companion, but there's a a Sheenover it.
So that means that it's something that was recently
lost. And then for whatever reason,
(51:19):
I'm seeing the word Bunny. And this poor woman started to
cry. Oh my God, this poor woman
started to cry. And she told me that her dog,
named Bunny had just died. Oh my God.
Oh that is insane. Crazy.
Yeah, that's wild. It was crazy.
I have made so many people cry and so many people come give me
(51:41):
hugs. Like, yeah.
And I remember one time at WholeFoods, I was with a group of
four women. We were in, like, the Whole
Foods Cafe because the coffee shop was closed.
And so I'm going around and giving them each of their
readings. And one by one, they start
sobbing. And I'm like, I understand that
this is emotional for you, but like there are people in this
whole. We're in a Whole Foods.
I'm. Telling you your mother's dead.
(52:02):
Oh. My God ma'am, this is a Whole
Foods this. Is Wendy's ma'am?
This is. Jen, I will say so an experience
I had with you. So when we set this up, it was
for a date night. I brought my soon to be
boyfriend along. You read both of our cheeses and
(52:22):
I went second so and in the cheese itself and this was like
the one that was about like my present timing.
And you saw like a little heart and then you saw the letter G
for gravy and you said is there somebody special in your life
that you are getting serious with or something?
(52:45):
And we had not shared Gravy's name with you yet, so you had no
idea that biscuit and gravy we're going getting together.
No. So we we both were like shut the
fuck up, Shut the fuck up. Like this is crazy.
That's so. Cute.
So you know. So take it from Biscuit here.
If Biscuit and Gravy got along and came out the other side.
(53:05):
Honey, this is some good shit. So Jen Levitt, 5 stars.
Thank you. Thank you.
So my, my husband was originallyfrom Texas and I as a writer, I
had to do some content marketingwork for a Texas power company
and they were, they told me to make it extremely Texan in what
(53:26):
I was saying. So I just would like pepper in
these weird sayings. And one of them was, it's a,
it's a gravy train on biscuit wheels.
And I told my husband and he's like, I'm so mad at you right
now. Like, so every time, anytime I
want to piss him off, I'm like, you're just on a great train
with biscuit wheels. Oh.
(53:47):
My God. I love that.
Well, I, I don't know about you,Pete, but this has been so much
fun. Jen, this thank you so much for
joining us on today's episode. I I think our listeners are
absolutely going to walk away with a lot of hopefully like fun
questions, be a lot more curiousabout yes, their cosmos,
logical, cosmological, cosmetological, you know,
(54:09):
whatever for the cosmos gonna beinterested in the cosmos, damn
it. Biscuit just wants a
cosmopolitan. Girl and some cheese.
And some cheese. Yeah.
Excellent. Absolutely.
Jen, thank you so much. I think all of our listeners are
gonna walk away with some laughsand questions, questioning
themselves, questioning their friends, their feral friends,
all of the things. Thank you.
From our fair relationship to yours.
(54:29):
I'm Pete. And I'm Biscuit.
And remember. Have fun, get fucked and get
feral like release.
I got something now to get the people on the floor.
All right. Welcome back to all our new and
returning feral friends to fair relationship.
I'm Pete. And I'm Biscuit.
Biscuit, how the fuck are you doing?
(00:21):
You know girl, I'm doing OK. I've been reading my horoscope
lately and she's been, she's been all right, she's been all
right. We're now out of my season, so
that does hurt, but we're getting, we're inching closer to
yours. Do you have any fun birthday
plans coming up? We sure are.
Yes, we will be getting something on the books for a
nice little trip. Oh, that's right.
(00:43):
So. Trust and believe.
Once that's finally, you know, Igot a few other things I got to
cross off the list first, but that is the next thing, so I'm
excited. She is a lady with priorities,
honey. She sure is.
My God, that just never stops. I know the work is never over.
It really never is. But you know what?
This is why we live for the weekends.
We do, which I feel like we bothhave some amazing things to talk
(01:06):
about as we put our gal on the on the stove top.
Oh yes, Miss Farrell Fawcett, our trusty little tea kettle.
Well, I can certainly go fill that bitch up.
But yes, honey, the stories thatwe have to share about and after
his experience that we both had,yes, but individually, but
actually from like about a monthago when we were at Market Days
(01:26):
in Chicago, lots of ridiculousness to share.
So I can't wait. I'll go put this bitch on and
we'll get that to you, but. Let's do it.
OK Biscuit, I feel like I, I feel like we should start when
we were together, right. One of the nights that we were
out and about market days weekend, we shared an afters
(01:48):
experience. We did and we've been to this
place a few times. Well, OK, so honestly a handful
of times at this point. We've got our punch card.
You know, usually they have their shit together, right?
But I just remembered you and I gravy bacon was there.
We just had the whole buffet. Yes.
And girl, I get that things comeup, but the funniest shit was
(02:10):
that the fire alarm kept going off.
Girl, I could not because I mean, this was and we're talking
like the commercial, like building fire alarms that the
like flashing lights. Flashing lights, yes.
Girl and we were all shook because at this place too, I
think part of The Afters like license or permit they had.
(02:30):
I think they have to serve food because of the time of day.
So we were like, is shit? Is something on fire in the
kitchen? No, look, like I feel like all
of us and we got there early just because it worked out with
our schedules and stuff. It just would have been a pain
in the ass to like go home then come back.
It just didn't make sense. So we got there with like a
decent group of people kind of right when it was beginning.
And I feel like we all collectively because it happened
(02:53):
like the IT would go off and then it would stop and we think
that everything be good, but it happened like four or five.
Times. It was ridiculous.
So I'll be honest, I feel like you and I exchanged some eyes,
at least my eyes. What was going on in my head was
do we leave? Yeah.
I yeah, I mean it was like I'm not having fun anymore.
When I will say though, that like commercial sounding like
(03:14):
alarm, it almost sounded like the circuit music whistle that
like yes. And I was like, Oh my God, OK.
Well, and then Fast forward likehours.
So we decided to stay obviously and Fast forward hours later.
Every once in a while I would think I heard it looped into the
music and I'm like, no, that's just my brain being fucked up
and like not knowing what's going on.
But at this afters, I'll go 1st and then I'll pass it off to
(03:37):
you, Biscuit. But you know my good pal Bacon,
right? At one point, you know,
everyone's starting to fade. You and Gravy have left.
It's just Bacon, myself and a couple other folks.
And Bacon had told me he's, you know, going to go disappear into
the darkroom for a little bit. Pop off sis love.
It get it girl. Absolutely.
So I'm like out on the dance floor with a couple of the other
(03:58):
friends and everyone kind of starts fading away.
And so there's one other friend left and he's just like, hey,
you know, I want to make sure, you know, we're is so before I
leave. And I'm like, oh, yeah,
absolutely. And I had texted Bacon a few
times over the last like, I don't know, hour, 2 hours,
something like that, and hadn't gotten a response.
So I do a lap in the front area where the DJ's at, nothing.
I do a lap in the back in the dark room area, nothing.
(04:20):
I'm like, oh OK, little concerned and I'm.
You know she's gone rogue. It's like 7 in the morning at
this point, right? Like it has the, the time has
come where like I, my, my cognitive reasoning is not
there. It's just I'm trying to problem
solve. Yes.
So I have Bacon's location. Everything's fine.
He's there. But I'm like, but I haven't
(04:40):
heard from him. And Bacon's always really good.
If he leaves or is going to leave with somebody, always will
come and find me, let me know what's going on.
And then does it? Yeah, none of that happened.
And so I'm like, fuck, what is going?
On yeah, that's a little terrifying.
Like, yes, bitch, did she die inthe dark room?
Like, what's that smell? It's bacon.
(05:01):
She's she's overcooked. And I haven't I haven't said
this part out loud, but this is the perfect medium to do so.
I was like, Oh my gosh, maybe hedid leave and like, but lost his
phone because this a big weekend.
People take phones. Pickpocketing is happening.
Yes. So I'm like, OK, just because
his phone is here doesn't mean like everything's fine.
That's true. So I'm like, fuck, I haven't
heard from him. No one's texting back like, OK,
(05:23):
someone's taking his phone and Idon't know where he's at.
So all of those things are just happening in my head in a matter
of like 10 minutes, right? And so I decide, hey, going to
do one more lap. I do that lap.
I finally go into the darkroom and I'm like in every nook and
cranny of that darkroom. I'm like, I'm going to make sure
that he is not here before I file an Amber Alert and alert
everybody's. Phone.
Oh my God, an Amber Alert. It's going to sound like a fire
(05:46):
alarm going off in there. Exactly, exactly.
And sure enough, I get into the furthest corner of the darkroom.
There's a chair, couch, whatever, and their bacon is
just having the time of his life.
And I, you know, I didn't interrupt it, but things were,
you know, there was a moment andI looked and I go.
Well, you look at your fucking phone.
Everything was fine. When bacon is ankles to Jesus,
(06:07):
ankles to Jesus. Like, yeah, well, that's.
Good. I'm glad it's fine.
Glad. I'm glad it worked out well.
Fortunately, my my story about the experience I had for an
afters that weekend, a little less dire, but pretty fucking
interesting. Yeah, in a few different ways.
So the very last night, Sunday night, went to one of the
(06:29):
circuit mom circuit parties. I got invited on party full and
we love our party full invites sure do to go to an afters that
began at 4:00 AM Love. Now the circuit party went until
6:00 AM and in the afternoon we received one of those text
blasts that said, hey, we're going to kick things off at 5:00
AM. So we're like, OK, that makes
(06:51):
sense. Just so it like ramps up before
the party fully ends. So we decide Gravy and I to
leave at 5:00 just to because wehad to take an Uber to get
there, but it gave you instructions with the apartment
number. Check in at the front desk.
They'll let you up. Just say who you're here to see.
OK, cool. Love it.
So we get there. It's now probably like 5:15,
(07:14):
5/20. And before I even get to the
check into the front desk, the door person says, oh, are you
here for apartments 402? And I was like, oh, why yes, I
am. And they're like, oh, OK, we'll
go on up. Oh, wait, just give me your
first name. And I was like, oh, OK, it's
(07:34):
Biscuit. And they let me on up one word,
no questions asked. I was like, I thought there
would be a little bit more of like a trial or something.
Like a screening. Yes, something yes.
So I get up there hallway reminds me of a psychiatric
ward. First of all, when we get off
there just dark quiet, the light, light buzzing of like the
(07:56):
like electric and I was just like, oh, this is a little
creepy, but the hallway is quietas fuck.
So I'm like what's going on? Well, the door was the last one
at the very end of the hallway. Walk up, turn the door handle,
doors unlocked. I'm like great.
Party started. Well, bitch, we walked in,
nobody was home. Absolutely nobody was home.
(08:17):
Like we did a whole lap and it was quiet.
All the lights were on. I was like, did the apocalypse
happen? Was there like the the Christian
reaping? They were all just holy prayers
or something. I don't know God, but it was
abandoned. And we were like, this is I
think a sign from the universe. It's it's time we end the
(08:38):
festivities and just call. It it's time to go, it's time.
To go. And I thought that was already,
you know, a decent hilarious experience until Gravy had just
recently joined an improv class and he had his first class just
after the market Days weekend. And he had had participated in a
(09:01):
couple of different scenes, likewith the various people in the
class. And a guy comes up to me and
goes, hey, I'm sorry, but I justgot to say you look really
familiar. And he goes, did you happen to
show up at like 5:00 in the morning at this building?
And he was like, I was the door person.
And I was like, are you fucking kidding me?
(09:25):
Stop just dead dad. He was the actually the door
person that day. He's like.
That is, he was like, yeah, there's.
A big gaggle that just like showed up all in one big wave
and he's like, it's like 6 in the morning.
Don't these people have jobs? Not on market days, weekend,
baby. Yeah.
No, honey, I mean, you got to keep in mind it was Monday
morning now, so I remember I waslike waiting for the Uber on the
(09:49):
way home after this love, after meeting this lovely improv class
attendee, I'm standing outside waiting for the Uber and I swear
to God I had two runners run past me and I was like, fuck my
life. But you know what, honey?
I just got just as many steps inas those bitches did.
Dance in my little tush off all night.
Honey, it was worth it was worthit.
(10:10):
But. So.
Funny. Here Did I see you at 6:00 AM on
a Monday looking for an orgy? I think so.
Well, look at that. And there she is, and there is
Miss Farrell. I'll just go ahead and grab her
up. I'm excited to talk to Jen and
talk all about astrology and something may be a little
cheesy, I don't know. Oh Jesus, here we go.
Here we go. Let's get it.
(10:35):
Well, Pete, today I'm super excited to welcome to the show
an astrologer and a tyromancer. And I know many of our listeners
probably have no freaking clue what that is.
So we are very excited to hear from Jen and Jen to shed some
light on the cosmos and all thatit does to bring out the most
feral sides of us. Welcome to fair relationship.
(10:58):
Thank you. Yay.
Happy to help me. Yes, there's that Leo energy.
As we record, I believe your birthday is tomorrow actually
correct. My birthday is tomorrow.
I'm going to get a very decadentcake and then eat cheese that
some cakes. Yes.
Maybe I'll have champagne, yeah.I mean cheesecake is my
(11:21):
favorite, so to me honestly those the combination of the two
works. I mean, it's pretty good.
Well, tell you what, Jen, just to kind of kick us off, if you
wouldn't mind, just introducing yourself a little bit to tell us
about your history with astrology and tyromancy, and
then we'll kind of dive right into the chaos of the episode.
Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.
So I am Jen, as we've learned. So I have been doing astrology
(11:46):
in some form or another sense since I was a teenager a long
time ago. Yeah.
It started with me just reading a lot of books about Leos
because clearly we are the superior sign.
No offense. Well, as a fellow Leo, I can
attest this is true. This is.
(12:07):
True. And then I got into doing birth
charts for people. When I asked my husband where he
was born and what time he was born, he was like, what are you
doing? Nothing, nothing, nothing.
It's fine. It's fine.
Just just. Go with it, babe.
And then I got tired of everybody talking about how much
Mercury retrograde is causing them to do stupid things.
(12:30):
And so I wrote a book about retrogrades, about how to deal
with the energy. OK.
And how timely given that we just got out of Mercury
retrograde and I know we've got several other retrograde
chromium process. Now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the tyromancy.
Tyromancy, if you don't know about it now, know about it
before you know about it now it is fortune telling with cheese.
(12:53):
I have been doing divination fortune telling since I was.
I've always been like this. And the cheese was a pandemic
project and now it's become a thriving workshop business.
A delicious one. Yes, two things I'll add to
that, Jen. Number one, I love that you very
much subscribe to the Born This Way anthem.
(13:15):
We very much here do too as well.
So Miss Gaga. But two, that's also how I came
to meet you. Through cheese that's.
Right, one of your entire romance experiences.
And it was, guys, when we get toit, I'll share some stories, but
it was crazy in the best of ways, so.
Good, I'm glad you weren't like that was total shit.
(13:36):
I know, Yeah. The holding of your breath,
you're like, wait, where's this going?
Where's this going? It was some stinky cheese.
We did have some stinky cheese but I ate it up anyway so loved
it. Excellent, Jen, Maybe the
retrogrades are a perfect place to start because this year has
been a year of crazy retrogrades.
I mean, I feel like every planethas been at some point this year
(13:59):
maybe, but it's been kind of a, you know, a colossal set of
chaotic planets. So would love your thoughts.
Just kick us off there, yeah? Yeah, it could stop.
That would be rad. Stop, please.
Yeah, If we could just go ahead and stop doing that, that'd.
Be great. I know.
Like even though we're out of Mercury retrograde, we're still
in the shadow period, which somepeople will say is even more
(14:20):
intense than the retrograde itself.
So good. You guys can't see me, but my
face is melting. Like literally melting.
And for the shadow period. So I've heard of these before,
but how long do they last on either side?
Like what? What does it look like?
It depends on the planet and where they are.
(14:41):
For Mercury, I can't remember exactly.
I think that's like a week or two weeks.
I don't know some. Someone will probably yell at
you in comments or something if I'm wrong.
So there. It's before and after.
Come at us, bro. Like, let's go.
Yeah, we got your back, Jen. Thank you, I love to be
corrected. Well, so just like let's dive
(15:04):
into straight into the fun then.So now that we've got Mercury
retrograde behind us, you know, we got just the the tail end of
summer, yeah, right and left ahead of us.
I know people are going to be excited to get out and enjoy the
chaotic fun that still remains before the the cold of winter.
So who should we look to? What signs are those that are
(15:27):
going to be the ones that stand out, that throw the wildest
parties that are going to be growing up in the I want it.
I want all the tea. All the tea, all the cheese, all
of it, you know. Yeah, well, obviously Leos will
throw the wildest parties. Yeah.
Everything is going to come backto Leos.
Like we just, we own it, you know?
Yes. Yeah, right.
(15:49):
Yeah. So, Jen, kind of, you know, in
true Leo's spirit, Leo's helpingLeo's here.
Oh my God I am tired of all of these Leo's I my Libra self.
I can't take not being in the spotlight, so I'm gonna need you
both to stop. But Jen, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I
want you to talk yourself up a little bit because you were also
recently featured in People's magazine, right?
(16:10):
Or People Magazine's website. Yeah, yeah.
I don't know if it's gonna be inprint, but yeah, People magazine
did a feature about me and my cheese.
It's fortune telling. And now my nephew thinks I'm
famous and I don't, I don't correct him.
Yes, you know, people, people recognize me in Chicago.
And I was telling my husband theother day that like, I love it,
but also it kind of sucks because now I have to drive
(16:32):
better. Cuz it's like if someone shows
up to one of my workshops and they're like, you cut me off,
you shouldn't. And I'm gonna be like, well
don't drive like an asshole you.Are and that is why you're on
the show, my friend, and we're thrilled to have you.
Yeah, have you noticed that everyone that has a sports team
custom license plate drives likea Dick?
No, but I'm going to look for itnow.
(16:52):
Do not get those custom plates. Yeah, it's very clear.
Support the athletics. You know, we, we have played gay
kickball here, so that, but I think that's more or less the
extent of our sportiness. I I like to consider myself an
athletic supporter. Yeah.
I was just going to say wow. Yeah, yes, yeah, yeah.
(17:12):
Sure. So Jen, for those that might be
relatively new or just exploring, you know, the side of
astrology. So let's start off with the
world of astrology real quick. And it talked to us like what
are the main alignments or positions or you know, like that
we hear about the sun, we hear about the moon.
I talked about positions. Did you love that?
(17:34):
My God, that tells you with my mind goes Pete calling me out.
So with that, just shed just a brief little light on that
before we dive into some of the the party fun behind the signs
that are. Yeah, absolutely.
So the sun, obviously your sun sign is your main Zodiac sign.
(17:55):
The moon is like your inner self, and it's kind of like the
the Catholic mother of your of your soul.
OK, haven't, haven't been raisedCatholic.
Our listeners know. Yep, Yep, very well.
She's recovering. Yeah, still we're making it
through. Yep.
Mm, hmm. Long road of recovery.
(18:17):
The rising is a lot of it is howyou present yourself to others,
but it also has a nice interplaywith your, with your sunshine.
So they, they all work together,you know, And then the Venus and
the Mars of you is your hotness,essentially, yes, Your, your
sexiness. And then how long you can carry
(18:39):
on that sexiness. You're fighting, you're fighting
energy here. So yeah.
OK, OK. Well, do you want me to liken
them to party persona? On what this means, please,
please, I'm begging you, OK? So your sun sign, and we can get
(18:59):
into the specific signs in a minute, but I'll just do the
sun, moon and rising in Venus and Mars.
So your sun sign is the confidence that you're feeling
on the dance floor. So this podcast gets like racy,
right? Oh yes.
Sure. OK, So I can say like, if you're
out there, like shaking your tits, like it's totally, yeah.
Please, I'd be offended you seenme on Saturday.
(19:21):
Fabulous. You should have seen me earlier
today. No for real though, like OK side
note, sorry I get distracted easily so.
No, you're in good company. So my office window looks right
out onto our little front stoop and my husband was walking up
after doing something in the cars and I knocked on the window
and I'm like what? It's just flashing in through
(19:44):
the window. It was fun.
So exactly. So the sun is your confidence on
the dance floor, how you feel putting yourself out there and
the energy that you're exuding. Your moon, like I said, it's
your Catholic mother. It's gonna be how guilty you
(20:05):
feel the next day for all this shit that you did.
Your rising sign is like the energy that you have when you
walk in the door. So the people that come flock to
you because of this vibe that you're giving off.
Like you've got the best outfit and you walk in and everybody's
like, Oh my God, yeah, the best.And then the Venus and Mars for
(20:25):
Venus and to say how many peopleyou like do The Dirty dancing
reactions with re enactions. Funny story.
So yes. And I were in Puerto Vallarta
earlier this year. We did this big beautiful boat
trip day and we were like on this boat with a bunch of
miscellaneous parties that we did not expect were going to be
(20:46):
on it. Yes, including like very
conservative Mormons. God bless them.
They definitely were exposed to a lot of homosexuals and speedos
and thongs that day. In a very short amount of time,
very short amount of. Time this was like an all
inclusive drinks involved and soby the end of the day we are
feeling pretty good and somebodyturned on The Dirty Dancing song
(21:11):
and I and the this woman like and I are out there dancing and
she runs at me and there is video footage of this that I
have to show you there is and somehow we were all terrified.
I was going to like, launch her off the boat, but somehow
miracles happen. I was recording it.
I was recording it happened. And literally as she goes to run
to Biscuit, I'm like, Oh my God,he he's gonna, they're both
(21:35):
going overboard because it was right at the front of the boat
where there's like all this rope, you know, type material
where you're just laying in sunbathing.
And that's where he decided to just put her up into the
position. And I go, oh, well, we're just
going to get a little top heavy and they're both going down.
They're both going down. We're yelling Timber Ke$ha's
going to come in like it's the this is the end.
Of the rope. But he did the lift.
(21:56):
No one fell ever in the lift. I surprised.
At the lift. The confidence alcohol gives.
You, that is hilarious. Oh, I was in LA and we were
walking down the street and there was some like shop like
storefront just having this random party.
I mean, it was probably planned.I don't know.
We randomly happened on it and everybody was like, oh, that
(22:17):
looks like fun. And I'm just like, yeah, let's
dance our way in. So we like danced our way into
this party and they let us in and then some guy started trying
to like swing dance with me. I am so uncoordinated, but he
twirled me around and the strap of my dress broke.
Oh my God. Oops.
Fell out and I was. Just like.
Enjoy everyone around. My neck.
(22:38):
You have like a full Janet Jackson.
Moment. Oh my gosh.
Yeah, it's. Amazing.
So, OK, so I think so we spoke about the Venus.
What was the Mars, Jen? Yes, the Mars.
So not only is it your stamina, but it's also like who you're
who you're reaching for. So like who are you buying the
drinks for? It's, you know, it's, yeah, it's
(23:01):
you reaching out and taking, taking what you want,
essentially with consent, with consent, with consent, yes.
So if we were to take those and then like try to apply them to
various signs, like how would you go about the various
archetypes if you. Yeah, I can go through the
Zodiac signs and I've got a party persona for each of them
(23:25):
and I've got the like, good things and the shit things that
they do. Party.
Sign I. Cannot wait.
I put a lot of research into this cuz.
It was very. Fun, yes.
So, OK, OK, so Aries, Aries is gonna be the dance starter, so
they're the one out on the dancefloor first.
OK, That is their persona. Now, however, they will suggest
(23:49):
a contest of some sort, a drinking contest, a dance
contest, a whatever contest. And then they may lose.
And then they're gonna whine about it for the rest of the
night. Sure, sure makes.
Sense that's the that's the Aries vibe.
Taurus. They really like familiar
things, so they're only gonna want to dance to songs that are
familiar to them. They're gonna be like, Bring Me
(24:11):
My Britney, and then they're gonna be out on the floor.
This makes so much sense for people I know already.
I'm like, this is crazy. Taurus will also offer to buy a
round for everyone, but then they're going to want to be in
charge of what drink everyone gets.
So everybody gets Akka soda that's.
(24:31):
It I'm getting the round, I'm getting the round, but I decide.
Yes. Gemini, my husband is a Gemini,
very clearly a Gemini husband. If you listen to this, I love
you very much, but you are such a Gemini.
The Gemini is the party spot fixture.
So every club, every dance, whatever, ever, the regular,
they're the regular. But here's the thing, they have
(24:53):
lots of these connections, but nothing too deep because they're
afraid to open up. Wow, OK.
Yeah, so they love like it's theduality of the Gemini, like they
love getting to that point. But then and I see a connection
that could be a big one, and they're like, oh God, Oh no,
I've I've shown to myself too much.
(25:14):
I gotta go, yeah. Exactly, exactly.
The cancer of the group is the bartending therapist.
Not. Necessarily the bartender, but
they're the ones that you would talk to.
So you think about when you go to a bar, you won't talk to the
bartender about all your problems.
So they are good for having sideconversations off to the side.
(25:36):
They're going to listen to you, they're going to be emotionally
invested, but then they're goingto be jealous when you give that
attention to someone else. This tracks.
This tracks. This tracks.
I know I'm I was thinking of my cancerian friends when I wrote
this. And we love you, girlies.
It's nothing against. You no love you just as much.
(25:58):
Yes, one of my nearest and dearest is an incredible cancer
and I love her so much. Actually, my college bestie is a
cancer. So true.
Okay, so Leos, the best sign. Interesting take.
We are take but go on. We are obviously the diva.
(26:19):
Clearly. We're the diva of the party.
We come in in the outfit, we command the attention, you know,
that kind of thing. We're the life of the party,
which is the good thing, but we also think we are the party, so.
This is also. Like this is me being a power
(26:39):
bottom of the orgy. Yes, yes, this tracks.
Yes. So I know I am the part of your
scenes, yeah. Yeah, yeah, you should best get,
you should feel seen. Yes, I cosign on.
All of that. I laughed really hard when I
wrote this one. I was like, this is so me.
All right, So Virgo, you are theorganizer, so you are planning
(27:03):
the orgy. However, you are leaving before
it becomes too complicated because you don't want to deal
with that that shit. And an orgy.
It could be quite literally. So you gotta be, yeah.
Yeah, you gotta, you know, stop.Please visit episode 7 of Season
2 Oopsie Poopsie for best tipsy tricks and how to manage that.
(27:25):
Absolutely, absolutely. Wait.
I love that though. The Virgo's like, hey, I'll do
the groundwork. I will.
I will. I'll start this.
But if it's getting too much like, hey, you know what?
This is not what I signed up for, so I'm gonna go.
Yeah, not here for the drama. OK.
And then Libra is the one that might be causing the drama.
(27:47):
Oh yes. So the Libra, their party
persona is really to make sure everyone is having a great time.
They want everyone to have fun. That's which is very true.
This is Pete. However, they will not only
bring their partner to the party, they will also bring
(28:08):
their frenemy to the party, everyone's frenemy to the party.
So. Causing a little bit of drama
here. Stir the pot.
Stirring the pot? Yeah.
Just just for funsies. Just for funsies, Yeah.
But hey, everybody's gonna have a good time.
Supposedly. We'll all walk away with
stories, at least. Yeah, I mean, if my ex-husband
(28:30):
showed up, we would have a greattime burning the place down.
So. But would it be memorable?
Best memory of my life so the Scorpio and.
I know lots of Scorpio Scorpio. Is me too this I'm ready.
The Scorpio is on a me journey. So they're there for themselves.
They are there to work some things out to get through the
(28:52):
how do I want to call it the insanity of the of the Scorpio.
So they they're on the me journey and then they like to
try all of the drinks. So everyone is having a drink.
They're going to try all of themand then they're going to go
pick a fight with their ex. Yep, that'll do it.
(29:13):
This I know somebody who is a Scorpio who always picks a fight
just as you suggested and the. The only unsolicited Dick pics
I've ever gotten have been from Scorpios.
Oh my God. Oh my God. 100% from Scorpios
(29:33):
every single time. I'm sorry, I was not ready for
that, but I love that. I mean, I don't love that, but
you know what I mean? I mean, I wasn't that upset.
Like it was a pretty good Dick. So, OK, yeah, it's a nice
support. Just in pictures because I'm
happily married. I had no interest but I was just
like, well that is a well formedpenis right there.
(29:55):
You know, but, but you gotta watch the live photos.
That's the tip. You gotta watch the live photos.
For the tip. That's a good point.
Yeah, right. OK, let's go to Sagittarius.
They are the party hopper, so they will go from party to party
to party. They're the friend that stays
out all night long. But then their problem is that
(30:16):
they don't know when to stop, soeveryone else is going home and
they're just like, no, let's keep partying, let's go, let's
go into someone's house. Yes.
Biscuit. Yeah, Biscuit.
Now I'm like, do I have some Sagittarius in me that I don't
know about because I don't know when to stop?
This is true. I've been there, I've been
there. Do you know what you're rising
is? Yeah, it's not that, but hey.
(30:37):
I think we can all embody parts of these.
Absolutely. I usually embody them by them
being in my body, you know what I mean?
Correct. Of course.
I mean, that's the right way to do it, you know, So, so
Capricorn is the one that parties the hardest.
They're the now that may be true, but they strategically
(30:59):
pick their partners at the partyand then leave them on red.
So they kind of disappear. And as somebody who has had
quite a bit of experience with aCapricorn in a relationship,
this is absolutely true. As a read.
Yeah, Capricorn, my ex-boyfriendwe've nicknamed the Home
(31:21):
Wrecker. So you know, Capricorns are
crazy is. Clutching her pearls.
All right, Aquarius. My dad is an Aquarius.
Bacon's an Aquarius. Definitely tracks for him.
So the Aquarius is the helper. They want to help do everything.
They're the joiner, they want to, they want to be there.
(31:43):
But they also they'll dance withyou but then tell you how you
were dancing wrong. They want to correct your moves.
Yes, yes, this is like a perfectread of my Aquarius friends.
I love you guys. Honey, that's amazing.
That is perfection actually. Can you actually, can you fix
(32:06):
this thing that you were just messing up, please?
Thank you. Yeah, right.
Oh gosh, my dad, the Aquarius, his favorite saying one of them
is why is there always never enough time to do it right the
first time, but always enough time to do it right the second
time? And I'm like, because you
haven't told anyone exactly how to do it the first time.
(32:27):
Oh my gosh, Papa Aquarius comingin with the tea.
Yeah. Yeah.
And then lastly is Pisces. They are the makeup artist.
They make everyone feel gorgeousbefore you go out.
They make partners feel magical and then they get bored and they
(32:51):
just wander away to find someoneelse to make feel beautiful.
Like leaving, leaving glitter everywhere.
Like just, oh, I'm gonna go overhere and do this and that's all
right. Well, I'm done and I'm gonna go
over here. Pisces is the glitter bomb.
The glitter, Yeah. Yes, yeah, I love.
That. Oh my God, this kind of just
(33:12):
gave us like a Zodiac menu, likea choose your own adventure of
like how you want to party, withwho, what's the mood, what's the
vibe? I fucking love it.
Biscuit I'm imagining now that we have this, you know, choosing
the vibe that we want when we'reout on a weekend.
Like is this thing on? I'm looking for a Pisces
tonight. Pisces.
(33:32):
Do we have any Pisces in the building?
Please find me in the corner. Dark room preferably.
Thank you so much. Yes.
Do you want me to type these up for you and send them?
Oh yes, we will post them take. A dart, Print it out.
Take a dart, throw it at the wall.
Yes, today we're going with a Libra and a Capricorn.
Yes, Oh my gosh. I also love like if you go on
(33:54):
like a group trip, you could almost like figure out like
triangulate some of the vibes that could work and whatnot.
So interesting. Biscuit.
That would actually be super funny.
If we like paired up who we've gone on a couple of trips with
recently and like what type of trip it was based on, that would
be funny. Oh my God, let's do it.
Let's absolutely do it. Oh my God, this.
Is like the start of a Nine Perfect Strangers episode.
(34:17):
Yes, and I'm a piece with that. So you know, as we look ahead to
the rest of the year and obviously we've got the various
signs, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, sagging and Cap Canada and the
year Cap being Capricorn, Sorry,I'm hip to the group guys.
But obviously the cosmos kind ofcontinue to move like the
(34:38):
positions of the stars and, and maybe even like their points of
intersection or how they engage with each other also evolve and
I believe these are called transits or aspects.
Exactly. Right.
Can you talk to us a little bit about what those are, what they
mean, how they change, what are the some common ones, just
general themes? Yeah.
So transit is a planet that is moving across your chart.
(35:02):
So it's just the way that your particular birth chart is
interacting with the orbit of different planets and that is
really reflecting your current emotions and how you are
reacting to things. Aspects are the angles between
planets and your birth chart. There are some that are hard,
some that are not so hard, and this is how your planets
(35:28):
interact to form your personality.
OK. So yes, and so that's how all of
the aspects in your chart kind of lean into, you know, who you
are as a human being. That's why we all have like the
sun, the moon, the rising, the descending, that kind of thing.
So. Yes.
So cuz I've I've heard of conjunctions, which I believe is
(35:48):
is that is that when they're like directly in the heart of
the other one and then I believethere are trines.
Yeah, sextiles, yeah. So trine sextiles conjunction.
Junction. Junction.
What's your function? That's immediately where I went,
so yeah. Yay.
So there are some major transitsfor the rest of the year, some
(36:09):
retrogrades coming up, so I can talk about that a little bit.
Yeah, there is a lunar eclipse on September 7th in Pisces.
This is going to be a very emotional lunar eclipse,
September 7th. September 7th.
So if you have never cried afterhaving sex, you probably will.
September. Let's see when Pluto is
(36:34):
currently retrograde and that isthrough October 13th.
Pluto is one of the big planets and it's it's intense.
So this is the return of old partners.
So if you feel like people from your past have been kind of
popping up lately, you have Pluto to thank for this.
Oh fuck you, Pluto. Right.
(36:57):
And then in September, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto are all
retrograde. So we already talked about
Pluto. These are the big planets.
So these are the ones that govern like the big things like
politics and like all of the like major wars and things like
that, right? So I will encourage you to
choose your outings wisely when Uranus, Neptune and Pluto are in
(37:22):
retrograde grain. Ohh.
God are retrograde isn't. You know it's not actually
correct to say in retrograde. It's just is retrograde how it
is. I had to edit myself when I was
writing my book 'cause I kept screwing it up.
Ohh. You're making me.
I'm, I'm nervous. I'm a little nervous, but you
know what? I mean, it'll be OK.
It'll be fine. We're just gonna live, laugh,
love ourselves, our our way through it.
(37:42):
Yeah, yeah, You know what? Here's the thing, right?
It doesn't matter what is going on astrologically as long as you
are living your truth and being who you are supposed to be and
getting consent and. Consent.
Yes. Snag Baby.
So as we're coming into Scorpio season, it's a very mischievous
(38:06):
season, you know, go ahead, sendsend your Dick pics to people.
But with. Consent with consent.
With consent, it's gonna be a fun time.
Scorpio season, things get wild.Yeah, cuz that's, I mean,
Halloween falls in Scorpio season, right?
Yep, Halloween is the very middle of Scorpio season.
(38:28):
Yes. Mischief.
That's why it is it is crazy. It is on fire.
You get, yeah, you get in some costume, Dick pics, all of it,
yes. This is like darkroom parties.
Yes, Turn all the lights off, see where things go, you know?
So everybody lean into Scorpio season.
It's gonna be a blast. We do have another Mercury
(38:51):
retrograde coming. Oh no.
I know this. This one was horrendous.
So Mercury retrograde is going to be November 9th.
Now remember the shadow period before that?
Sometimes a little bit worse. So yes, that's right.
You can expect drama. You can expect people not
responding to your text messages.
So all those hookups, all those hookups you had on Halloween.
(39:13):
On Halloween, they're gonna ghost you.
They're gonna ghost you. They're gone.
They might ghost you, but maybe not on purpose.
So you never know, because it's so many technological problems,
communication problems, you know, somebody's gonna call you
an Uber and they're gonna drop you off 8 miles from where you
live, something like that, you know?
Just a minor kidnapping, no big deal.
Ever couple more things. There's a Jupiter and Saturn
(39:37):
retrogrades in November. These are classified as social
planets, so there could be some arguments coming up in the
friend group, some disagreementsabout where to go, what to do,
and how to do it. So be prepared for that.
There's gonna be trouble at the Thanksgiving table, honey.
Friendsgiving on fire. That's right.
(39:57):
That's right. So besides.
The birthday kiddos, Are there any other signs that stand out
as being potential main character energies?
It's pretty much always fire signs.
We just, we just can't help it. We are the party, remember, and.
Which are sorry? Which are the fire signs?
(40:19):
Aries, Leo and Sagittarius. But I also feel like Capricorn
is gonna have themselves quite the time.
So yeah, I mean, look, look out for Capricorn.
They come out of the woodwork and they throw down all.
Right caps. That that could that could mean
a good time. Yeah.
So then if we think outside of the main characters, are there
(40:42):
any that we should just like stay the fuck away from or or
any any are there any connections perhaps between
various signs of like, maybe that's not a good combo because
we're also coming up to the coldseason, so it's going to be
nesting time soon. Sure, 100%.
Capricorn, you know, they're, they can be a little flighty.
(41:05):
So I mean, if you put a Cancer in a Capricorn together, they
might have a great time, like, you know, forgetting the other
person is there and still being happy.
But I would not put them with someone who is aiming for the
stability that we want from likethe cozy cuddle season.
So probably not going to want them with a Cancer.
(41:27):
And then, you know, a Cancer in Libra have to be careful too,
because Libra can be kind of dramatic.
No, it's not always as balanced as you think, but.
You don't say. Livery can be kind of dramatic.
Cancer will get irritated. Solid.
Let's see. Yeah.
(41:47):
I think just like generally firesigns and air signs do well
together, water signs and earth signs do well together.
But it's interesting because some water signs, like I really
vibe with them as a fire sign. So, you know, it can change.
You know, don't be with someone who's going to go against what
you want to do. Like not saying that you
(42:10):
shouldn't compromise or whatever, but like if you want
someone who's like always there,don't pick someone who's going
to go out every night and leave you alone by yourself.
Yes. And listen to your intuition
because your intuition is also very in tune astrologically
because it's all energy, right? And if your intuition is being
like that person is skeezy, likeget away from that person.
(42:31):
You do not need them. Listen to your heart.
So true. Well, and I just had a
connection of course, like I Libra is an air sign.
How am I supposed to breathe with no air?
Jordan sparks, You know what I mean?
Like it's just all making sense to me right now.
Like the energy, the air. Bitch, I'm getting on touch
tunes. We are going out.
I am locking down that karaoke list at the bar.
(42:53):
We are doing it honey. Do not skip.
Ahead, touch tunes. Ohh, my gosh, it is like a a
jukebox that you can like you have there's an app that you can
download and then you can request songs in the app.
Yeah, modern day jukebox. Yes, yeah, but you can like pay
extra to skip and so and you cango in the app and find where
they're at too. And I'm absolutely gone in and
(43:15):
you can just take over. Funny story about that,
actually. I was on a bachelor party trip.
We were down in Flora Bama. I've heard about it, yes.
It is familiar. Exactly like what you have heard
about, but we took a party bus one day and this party bus ended
up like breaking down and we ended up at this bar called The
(43:38):
Keg. You walk in, there's no windows,
There's thick wall of smoke because they could smoke inside.
And you know, I saw this background screen on their phone
was the Confederate flag. And I was like, I don't think
I'm welcome here. I don't you know, this is not,
this is not great. No.
But they had a touch tunes. And so, honey, it became a gay
bar real fast. Let me tell you, I was playing
(44:02):
Cher, I was playing Britney, I was playing Dua, I was playing
Whitney. I even played RuPaul's Kitty
Girl. It was amazing.
And I I favored it on my app so that I could always just
randomly drop in the gayest songfrom thousands of miles away.
It's amazing. Stop.
It warms my heart. That is my perfection.
(44:23):
I love fabulous my friend and I went to.
I would say that she is someone I have a fair relationship with.
We went to, we went, we went to karaoke at the sports bar in the
suburbs of Chicago and it was like a full of like the douche
Bros, you know, like the sports douche Bros.
(44:44):
And I love sports but I'm not a douche Bros so.
Athletic Supporter. Athletic.
Supporter. Yes, the bad athletic
supporters. So we took over the karaoke and
did only Disney songs, all Disney songs, all night.
It was amazing. And there were like little kids
(45:05):
coming up and singing with us every now and then.
And we'd be like, yeah, we wouldtry to pull in like the dude
Bros. I'm like no my thing.
Oh my God, love it. Love.
It and we're like, haven't you ever dreamed about being part of
our world? Yes, Oh my gosh.
Well, Pete, I, I think it could be a little fun, Jen, if you're
(45:27):
up for it, of course, to maybe like if we threw out some like
just miscellaneous party personas or archetype or or what
have you. I like this.
Let's do it. Yeah, I think the first one that
comes to my mind, Biscuit, we talk about this type of person a
lot. We see them out at the parties.
A demon twink for. Example.
Oh my God. So you know Jen, you know the
(45:50):
demon twink really is exactly what it sounds.
That's a Scorpio for sure. This this is this Rings crew.
Yep, Yep, Yep. I No, no, no.
No. OK I I want to know who's the
person that is most likely to take over the Spotify playlist?
(46:11):
Well, I think that's a Leo. Oh damn.
Oh he's so close. I thought for sure cuz Pete does
this all the time. He walks in.
He's like a little QR code. I'd like to join the jam.
I'd like to join the jam please.Yeah, but Pete, you've you've
got 2 Leos in your. In your chart I do Libra, Leo
Leo so it makes sense. I mean it's.
(46:33):
There. Yeah.
And I'm Leo, Leo Libra. So all of us would do it.
Yes and so karaoke actually thatmakes perfect sense and and my
wow, I really did just that's a self fulfilling prophecy.
I just did there, didn't it? Also very Leo me Sure it's about
me never. OK.
What about, you know, this kind of party adjacent, But I would
(46:54):
say like, like a sugar daddy, right?
So like, somebody's coming to the party, like wanting to do
all of the things and pay for everything.
Yeah. I'm going to say that this could
be an Aquarius. It could be.
Now I think some people might disagree with me, but but they
(47:18):
they love to be in people's business.
They do. I'm like, they sure do baby.
Yeah, and I mean like. Yeah, OK.
I love that. Who's most likely going to be
the one that's just Queen of theDarkroom?
How many times can I answer Leo?Oh my.
(47:39):
Gosh. No, this would be, I think I'm
going to say Aries for this one.Oh, OK, Yep.
They're a RAM for a reason. OK.
OK. So sorry, on the flip side of
that, who's like darkroom not going anywhere near it, not the
vibe. Absolutely.
Probably cancer. They're too emotional.
(48:01):
I get so emotional, baby. Oh yes.
Strings are definitely attached with the cancer.
Got it. This has been a ton of fun, and
I've certainly have learned a lot about astrology and all the
signs, and certainly now we'll be tapping specific friends for
different avenues of adventures,if you will.
Absolutely. We'll be creating a roster at
(48:22):
this point, Basket. Like we'll be like, you know
what? Yeah.
What type of night are we tryingto have?
We better. Oh, excuse me, cancer.
You're staying home. Yeah.
If you, if you ever like, put all the signs in a hat and then
pull them out to decide who you go out with, you have to let me
know. Oh, absolutely, yes, we'll
spill. I want to know how it goes.
Oh, my gosh. But I want to back briefly to
(48:45):
something we talked about at thestart of the episode.
That is another area of specialty that I think not many
of our listeners are probably very familiar with.
But again, that you were featured in people's website all
about tyromancy. So Jen, clue us in.
Yeah. What is tyromancy?
What's history of it? What the hell is cheese fortune
(49:07):
telling? So Tyra Mancy is the art of
telling fortunes with cheese. It dates back to the 2nd
century, was the first recorded mention of it.
It was really most popular in the agrarian societies with a
lot of cows and goats and sheep and, you know, just the animals
that you can milk. Makes sense.
Yeah, with a good cheese climate.
So, like, nothing super arid, although they do have their own
(49:29):
cheese. I just don't like it that much.
No offense but like camel cheeseis supposed to be disgusting.
Oh my God, I can imagine they'resupposed to like, use horrible
smelling as it is. I can imagine what's coming out
of them. Right.
So the way that you do cheese fortune telling is you look at
the surface of the cheese and the variations in it and then
you basically do divination fromit.
You tell a story based on what you see.
(49:51):
You can use literally any kind of cheese, even vegan cheese.
I've used Kraft singles. I have used blue cheese
dressing. What?
Yeah, I was in Wisconsin, I think I was in Madison, and
everybody got cheese at the table and they had me go around
and do everybody's cheese. And then the last guy was like,
I have a salad but my dressing is blue cheese.
(50:15):
So I read his salad and blue cheese dressing and it was
accurate. So yeah.
I love that. So can you give us examples
like, yeah, are there any thingsthat stand out from readings
where people were like, holy shit, that was unbelievable.
Like any anything. Yes.
So I did one reading where I waslooking at this piece of cheese
(50:37):
and I saw a plane, like an imageof a plane.
And then I swear to God, I saw the outline of the state of Iowa
and I was like, I don't know whythis is, but you're going to
Iowa soon. And this woman told me that she
had a trip planned to Iowa in two weeks.
Oh my gosh. And I was like oh that's crazy.
(50:58):
And then there was another time where I saw the shape of a dog,
but it had like a little film ofcheese over the dog shaped hole.
And then next to it, the cheese said the word Bunny.
And I said, OK, so I'm seeing a dog, which means that there's a
companion, but there's a a Sheenover it.
So that means that it's something that was recently
lost. And then for whatever reason,
(51:19):
I'm seeing the word Bunny. And this poor woman started to
cry. Oh my God, this poor woman
started to cry. And she told me that her dog,
named Bunny had just died. Oh my God.
Oh that is insane. Crazy.
Yeah, that's wild. It was crazy.
I have made so many people cry and so many people come give me
(51:41):
hugs. Like, yeah.
And I remember one time at WholeFoods, I was with a group of
four women. We were in, like, the Whole
Foods Cafe because the coffee shop was closed.
And so I'm going around and giving them each of their
readings. And one by one, they start
sobbing. And I'm like, I understand that
this is emotional for you, but like there are people in this
whole. We're in a Whole Foods.
I'm. Telling you your mother's dead.
(52:02):
Oh. My God ma'am, this is a Whole
Foods this. Is Wendy's ma'am?
This is. Jen, I will say so an experience
I had with you. So when we set this up, it was
for a date night. I brought my soon to be
boyfriend along. You read both of our cheeses and
(52:22):
I went second so and in the cheese itself and this was like
the one that was about like my present timing.
And you saw like a little heart and then you saw the letter G
for gravy and you said is there somebody special in your life
that you are getting serious with or something?
(52:45):
And we had not shared Gravy's name with you yet, so you had no
idea that biscuit and gravy we're going getting together.
No. So we we both were like shut the
fuck up, Shut the fuck up. Like this is crazy.
That's so. Cute.
So you know. So take it from Biscuit here.
If Biscuit and Gravy got along and came out the other side.
(53:05):
Honey, this is some good shit. So Jen Levitt, 5 stars.
Thank you. Thank you.
So my, my husband was originallyfrom Texas and I as a writer, I
had to do some content marketingwork for a Texas power company
and they were, they told me to make it extremely Texan in what
(53:26):
I was saying. So I just would like pepper in
these weird sayings. And one of them was, it's a,
it's a gravy train on biscuit wheels.
And I told my husband and he's like, I'm so mad at you right
now. Like, so every time, anytime I
want to piss him off, I'm like, you're just on a great train
with biscuit wheels. Oh.
(53:47):
My God. I love that.
Well, I, I don't know about you,Pete, but this has been so much
fun. Jen, this thank you so much for
joining us on today's episode. I I think our listeners are
absolutely going to walk away with a lot of hopefully like fun
questions, be a lot more curiousabout yes, their cosmos,
logical, cosmological, cosmetological, you know,
(54:09):
whatever for the cosmos gonna beinterested in the cosmos, damn
it. Biscuit just wants a
cosmopolitan. Girl and some cheese.
And some cheese. Yeah.
Excellent. Absolutely.
Jen, thank you so much. I think all of our listeners are
gonna walk away with some laughsand questions, questioning
themselves, questioning their friends, their feral friends,
all of the things. Thank you.
From our fair relationship to yours.
(54:29):
I'm Pete. And I'm Biscuit.
And remember. Have fun, get fucked and get
feral like release.
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