November 20, 2025 • 13 mins
Feeling anxious about what people will say about your plate this holiday season, especially if you have some new health and nutrition goals? Nutritionist and host Chris Newport breaks down why holiday food comments and food pressure are so common—and why they’re usually not actually about you.
You’ll learn:
- The real reasons people comment on what you are (or aren’t) eating
- How family traditions, insecurity, and “food as love” show up at the table
- Simple, kind, and clear scripts to respond to:
- “That’s all you’re eating?”
- “Come on, it’s the holidays!”
- “You’re no fun tonight.”
- “Look at you being all healthy.”
- How to set boundaries without creating drama
- A mindset reset you can use before you walk into any holiday meal
You deserve holidays filled with connection—not commentary on your plate.
💬 If this episode resonates, send it to a friend who needs a little extra support this season.
🎧 For more support with fueling, performance, and feeling good in your body, visit The Endurance Edge at TheEnduranceEdge.com.
Check out the full blog post here: https://www.theenduranceedge.com/how-to-handle-holiday-food-comments/
🥗💪🏃♀️ The 28-Day Nutrition Gut Reset is designed for active people and athletes who want better digestion, steadier energy, and stronger recovery heading into the new year. You’ll get expert guidance, simple structure, and live support three times per week. We start January 1st. Enrollment is limited and closes January 5th. Learn more at theenduranceedge.com/reset.
🎧 Thanks for tuning in to the Find Your Edge Podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend, subscribe, and leave us a review — it helps more athletes like you find the show. 💪✨
📚 Download our free resources:
- 🥗 Guide to High Performance Healthy Eating
- 🏊♀️ 6 Steps to Triathlon Success: Free Guide
- 💧 Hydration Guide for Athletes
- 🏃♂️ Runner's Fueling & Hydration Cheat Sheet
🌐 Find us here: TheEnduranceEdge.com
🏆 Race with us: Humans of Steel Olympic & Sprint Triathlon at Harris Lake, NC
💊 Purchase Safe Supplements here (you'll be prompted to create an account)
⭐ Explore our Favorites Things & Partners
📲 Follow us on Instagram or Facebook
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (01:00):
Hey friends, and welcome back to the Find Your
Edge podcast.
I am your host, Coach ChrisNewport, and today, as promised,
we are diving into somethingthat every single one of us
deals with during the holidays.
Food comments, food pressure,and people having all the
opinions about what you are orare not eating.
(01:21):
And listen, none of this hasanything to do with your
character, your discipline, oryour worth.
But these comments can throw usoff, especially when we're
trying to feel good or stay ontrack with a particular health
goal or simply enjoy the seasonwithout any guilt.
So today we're going a littlebit deeper.
(01:41):
Talking about why people makecomments, how to understand the
reasons behind them, and how torespond with ease, confidence,
kindness, and boundaries.
Oof, let's get to it.
All right, so why people makefood comments, even when it's
really none of their business.
(02:02):
So understand this first.
Most food comments are notactually about you, they're
about them.
They're about their ownfeelings, their own
insecurities, their ownconditioning, their own specific
expectations.
Here are the biggest reasons whypeople react to your food
choices.
It may highlight their owninsecurity.
(02:26):
Your intentional choice, whetheryou're eating salad or you're
eating stuffing, can make themthink, ugh, should I be doing
that?
So their comment, wow, you'rebeing so good today, may really
mean I kind of wish I felt incontrol today.
So think about that.
And hopefully approaching thatwith and considering that
(02:48):
comment with a little bit morecompassion.
So another thing to consider isthat they crave belonging.
Holiday meals are all aboutbringing people together and
bonding and tradition.
So when you choose a littledifferently than some people
expect you to choose, certainlyif things have changed or if you
(03:09):
have new goals and are choosingdifferently than you may have in
years past, some peopleinterpret this as you're
breaking the ritual.
They may also interpret yourchoice as some level of
judgment.
So even when you're literallyminding your own business and
eating the food on your ownplate, they may think that
(03:31):
you're judging their choices.
So they might get defensive.
So just understand that.
And let me give you an example,thinking, I know what I should
be doing, but I'm not doing it.
And now you're doing it, and nowI feel uncomfortable.
(03:54):
So they comment to relieve theirdiscomfort.
Another one could be some levelof envy or jealousy disguised as
sarcasm.
Oh, look at you being allhealthy.
Have I heard that before?
Translation, I wish I had yourdiscipline.
They may also feel out ofcontrol.
Food is an emotional regulationfor a lot of people.
(04:17):
And that doesn't mean that thosepeople may be wrong or broken.
Not at all.
We are all beautifully andwonderfully made human beings.
And we're here to experiencelife in its fullest form and go
through all the ups and downsand be able to deal with the
challenges in front of us.
So your calm approach may stirup some level of shame or fear
(04:41):
or helplessness within somebodyelse.
So people may also lackawareness.
So some people literally don'trealize that their comments are
rude or intrusive.
I'm thinking of some familymembers in my family, but that's
okay.
They shall remain unnamed.
(05:03):
So, you know, maybe a littlechuckle under your breath, as I
was just doing, just thinkingabout those comments of like, oh
wow, that was a reallyinappropriate comment, but I'm
not going to say it out loud,just kind of smile.
And then there may be some levelof cultural or familial
conditioning.
So some families narrate everyplate, this is what we do.
(05:24):
And if you're not doing that,then you're breaking the script.
Food for some folks and for alot of folks means love.
And in the sense that,especially with what is called a
nutrition gatekeeper.
So that might be if you're goingto your mom's house for
(05:45):
Thanksgiving dinner, she mightbe the one that is the one
preparing a lot of the meal.
And she is the nutritiongatekeeper.
So you kind of have to know howto strategize around that.
And if she is making the meal,that may be her intention of
sending love to her family,albeit maybe in a little bit of
(06:07):
a way that is not supportive ofeverybody around them.
But declining a dish may feellike you're rejecting them or
declining their love.
And this can be especially truearound the holidays.
So now that we know why peoplemake comments and how to have a
(06:28):
little bit more empathy andcompassion for the potential
psychology behind it, let's talkabout what some of the comments
might be and some of yourpotential responses that can be
confident, that can be kind, andcan be clear and still
maintaining boundaries and stillaligning with your goals and
(06:48):
your values.
So let's say you are someone whois used to taking larger
portions and you don't fill yourplate very much.
You're taking smaller portionsbecause that aligns with you
right now.
You might hear, that's allyou're eating.
A potential response from youmight be, this is where I'm
going to start.
(07:09):
Thank you for noticing.
I'm just listening to what mybody needs today.
Yeah, I would like cannot waitto try everything.
Or everything looks amazing.
I'm just starting small todaycan be a good response to that.
Especially for uh, you needmaybe the extra compliment or
the extra love for that personwho might feel like you're going
(07:34):
outside of their particularboundaries, or that you're
declining their offering oftheir food, which to them means
you're declining their love.
Here's another scenario.
You tend to maybe, let's say youhave just typically raved about
(07:56):
the pecan pie every year and youalways go back for seconds.
And this year you don't.
Someone might say, Oh, come on,it's the holidays.
You can have those same calm,confident responses that I had
mentioned earlier.
Like, wow, that was sodelicious.
I'm so grateful for that pie.
(08:17):
I'm just choosing to slow down alittle bit right now.
Or I've got some goals that I'mworking towards.
If you want to go there, becauseyou might get some follow-up
questions.
If you're not comfortable withfollow-up questions, then that
may not be the appropriateresponse for you.
Or you can say, man, I have justbeen so overwhelmed with how
(08:37):
delicious this meal has beenthat I'm gonna make sure I'm
gonna slow down right now andjust digest for a moment.
Thank you for noticing.
Or don't thank them fornoticing.
Either way, whatever feels rightto you.
All right, so let's say you'rethe one who oftentimes is
getting a glass of wine orhaving beer or whatever and
you're declining it this year.
(08:58):
Maybe it's not aligning withyour goals and your values.
Someone might say, Oh, you're nofun tonight.
And if you are someone whoenjoys a light and friendly
response and that works for you,can say, Well, hey, I'm trying
something new today.
Wish me luck.
We'll see how it goes.
Or it's all part of the masterplan, at least that's what I'm
(09:21):
telling myself.
Or you can say, you know what, Ijust I don't feel quite up for
that little bit extra.
I'm just doing my thing today.
Or it's just what I felt liketoday.
Or I really appreciate younoticing, but I'm I'm feeling
good right now.
Another thing you can say is,let's just enjoy our time
(09:42):
together.
So here's another potentialresponse.
You choose something like thesalad or the vegetables or the
turkey, and you're maybe notusually choosing something that
may not be often consideredsomething healthy.
Everything can fit in your diet,however.
Generally speaking, everybody'sa little bit different though,
(10:02):
so which is why it's importantthat we're not judging.
However, someone might say, Ohgoodness, you're being so strict
right now.
So, again, a potential responseis, oh wow.
Again, I appreciate yourconcern, but I'm making food
choices that are working for meright now.
(10:24):
Or, oh, well, I appreciate younoticing.
Let's just enjoy our timetogether.
How was your day?
You know, so like change thesubject.
That can be another easy onethat you can do.
So here's a little mindset resetbefore you head into these
holiday situations.
So take a few seconds to remindyourself.
(10:45):
So whether you are in the car ortaking a walk prior to going to
wherever you're going or on theplane or whatever, remind
yourself and maybe even writethis down.
I would definitely encourage youto journal about this.
My choices are mine.
I don't owe anyone anexplanation.
I can be kind and still holdboundaries.
(11:08):
And I choose presence overpressure.
I love that one for certainlyfor me right now.
I choose presence over pressure.
So anchor yourself in yourvalues, anchor yourself in your
goals, and in how you want tofeel, not only for one holiday
meal, but for the entireholidays, and let everything
(11:31):
else fall away.
Holidays should be aboutconnection and not commentary.
You deserve to enjoy food,family, and traditions in
whatever form or fashion that isright for you without feeling
like you're interrogated.
You can be loving andself-honoring, you can hold
boundaries and be gracious andkind.
(11:54):
And you can enjoy the heck outof the season without abandoning
yourself.
So if this resonated, certainlysend it to someone who needs it.
And stay tuned for some moreholiday support episodes.
You got this, friend.
You are worthy, you are loved,and you are a beautiful and
(12:15):
wonderful soul, body, and mindinside and out.
Thanks for listening to the FindYour Edge podcast.
Hey friends, and welcome back to the Find Your
Edge podcast.
I am your host, Coach ChrisNewport, and today, as promised,
we are diving into somethingthat every single one of us
deals with during the holidays.
Food comments, food pressure,and people having all the
opinions about what you are orare not eating.
(01:21):
And listen, none of this hasanything to do with your
character, your discipline, oryour worth.
But these comments can throw usoff, especially when we're
trying to feel good or stay ontrack with a particular health
goal or simply enjoy the seasonwithout any guilt.
So today we're going a littlebit deeper.
(01:41):
Talking about why people makecomments, how to understand the
reasons behind them, and how torespond with ease, confidence,
kindness, and boundaries.
Oof, let's get to it.
All right, so why people makefood comments, even when it's
really none of their business.
(02:02):
So understand this first.
Most food comments are notactually about you, they're
about them.
They're about their ownfeelings, their own
insecurities, their ownconditioning, their own specific
expectations.
Here are the biggest reasons whypeople react to your food
choices.
It may highlight their owninsecurity.
(02:26):
Your intentional choice, whetheryou're eating salad or you're
eating stuffing, can make themthink, ugh, should I be doing
that?
So their comment, wow, you'rebeing so good today, may really
mean I kind of wish I felt incontrol today.
So think about that.
And hopefully approaching thatwith and considering that
(02:48):
comment with a little bit morecompassion.
So another thing to consider isthat they crave belonging.
Holiday meals are all aboutbringing people together and
bonding and tradition.
So when you choose a littledifferently than some people
expect you to choose, certainlyif things have changed or if you
(03:09):
have new goals and are choosingdifferently than you may have in
years past, some peopleinterpret this as you're
breaking the ritual.
They may also interpret yourchoice as some level of
judgment.
So even when you're literallyminding your own business and
eating the food on your ownplate, they may think that
(03:31):
you're judging their choices.
So they might get defensive.
So just understand that.
And let me give you an example,thinking, I know what I should
be doing, but I'm not doing it.
And now you're doing it, and nowI feel uncomfortable.
(03:54):
So they comment to relieve theirdiscomfort.
Another one could be some levelof envy or jealousy disguised as
sarcasm.
Oh, look at you being allhealthy.
Have I heard that before?
Translation, I wish I had yourdiscipline.
They may also feel out ofcontrol.
Food is an emotional regulationfor a lot of people.
(04:17):
And that doesn't mean that thosepeople may be wrong or broken.
Not at all.
We are all beautifully andwonderfully made human beings.
And we're here to experiencelife in its fullest form and go
through all the ups and downsand be able to deal with the
challenges in front of us.
So your calm approach may stirup some level of shame or fear
(04:41):
or helplessness within somebodyelse.
So people may also lackawareness.
So some people literally don'trealize that their comments are
rude or intrusive.
I'm thinking of some familymembers in my family, but that's
okay.
They shall remain unnamed.
(05:03):
So, you know, maybe a littlechuckle under your breath, as I
was just doing, just thinkingabout those comments of like, oh
wow, that was a reallyinappropriate comment, but I'm
not going to say it out loud,just kind of smile.
And then there may be some levelof cultural or familial
conditioning.
So some families narrate everyplate, this is what we do.
(05:24):
And if you're not doing that,then you're breaking the script.
Food for some folks and for alot of folks means love.
And in the sense that,especially with what is called a
nutrition gatekeeper.
So that might be if you're goingto your mom's house for
(05:45):
Thanksgiving dinner, she mightbe the one that is the one
preparing a lot of the meal.
And she is the nutritiongatekeeper.
So you kind of have to know howto strategize around that.
And if she is making the meal,that may be her intention of
sending love to her family,albeit maybe in a little bit of
(06:07):
a way that is not supportive ofeverybody around them.
But declining a dish may feellike you're rejecting them or
declining their love.
And this can be especially truearound the holidays.
So now that we know why peoplemake comments and how to have a
(06:28):
little bit more empathy andcompassion for the potential
psychology behind it, let's talkabout what some of the comments
might be and some of yourpotential responses that can be
confident, that can be kind, andcan be clear and still
maintaining boundaries and stillaligning with your goals and
(06:48):
your values.
So let's say you are someone whois used to taking larger
portions and you don't fill yourplate very much.
You're taking smaller portionsbecause that aligns with you
right now.
You might hear, that's allyou're eating.
A potential response from youmight be, this is where I'm
going to start.
(07:09):
Thank you for noticing.
I'm just listening to what mybody needs today.
Yeah, I would like cannot waitto try everything.
Or everything looks amazing.
I'm just starting small todaycan be a good response to that.
Especially for uh, you needmaybe the extra compliment or
the extra love for that personwho might feel like you're going
(07:34):
outside of their particularboundaries, or that you're
declining their offering oftheir food, which to them means
you're declining their love.
Here's another scenario.
You tend to maybe, let's say youhave just typically raved about
(07:56):
the pecan pie every year and youalways go back for seconds.
And this year you don't.
Someone might say, Oh, come on,it's the holidays.
You can have those same calm,confident responses that I had
mentioned earlier.
Like, wow, that was sodelicious.
I'm so grateful for that pie.
(08:17):
I'm just choosing to slow down alittle bit right now.
Or I've got some goals that I'mworking towards.
If you want to go there, becauseyou might get some follow-up
questions.
If you're not comfortable withfollow-up questions, then that
may not be the appropriateresponse for you.
Or you can say, man, I have justbeen so overwhelmed with how
(08:37):
delicious this meal has beenthat I'm gonna make sure I'm
gonna slow down right now andjust digest for a moment.
Thank you for noticing.
Or don't thank them fornoticing.
Either way, whatever feels rightto you.
All right, so let's say you'rethe one who oftentimes is
getting a glass of wine orhaving beer or whatever and
you're declining it this year.
(08:58):
Maybe it's not aligning withyour goals and your values.
Someone might say, Oh, you're nofun tonight.
And if you are someone whoenjoys a light and friendly
response and that works for you,can say, Well, hey, I'm trying
something new today.
Wish me luck.
We'll see how it goes.
Or it's all part of the masterplan, at least that's what I'm
(09:21):
telling myself.
Or you can say, you know what, Ijust I don't feel quite up for
that little bit extra.
I'm just doing my thing today.
Or it's just what I felt liketoday.
Or I really appreciate younoticing, but I'm I'm feeling
good right now.
Another thing you can say is,let's just enjoy our time
(09:42):
together.
So here's another potentialresponse.
You choose something like thesalad or the vegetables or the
turkey, and you're maybe notusually choosing something that
may not be often consideredsomething healthy.
Everything can fit in your diet,however.
Generally speaking, everybody'sa little bit different though,
(10:02):
so which is why it's importantthat we're not judging.
However, someone might say, Ohgoodness, you're being so strict
right now.
So, again, a potential responseis, oh wow.
Again, I appreciate yourconcern, but I'm making food
choices that are working for meright now.
(10:24):
Or, oh, well, I appreciate younoticing.
Let's just enjoy our timetogether.
How was your day?
You know, so like change thesubject.
That can be another easy onethat you can do.
So here's a little mindset resetbefore you head into these
holiday situations.
So take a few seconds to remindyourself.
(10:45):
So whether you are in the car ortaking a walk prior to going to
wherever you're going or on theplane or whatever, remind
yourself and maybe even writethis down.
I would definitely encourage youto journal about this.
My choices are mine.
I don't owe anyone anexplanation.
I can be kind and still holdboundaries.
(11:08):
And I choose presence overpressure.
I love that one for certainlyfor me right now.
I choose presence over pressure.
So anchor yourself in yourvalues, anchor yourself in your
goals, and in how you want tofeel, not only for one holiday
meal, but for the entireholidays, and let everything
(11:31):
else fall away.
Holidays should be aboutconnection and not commentary.
You deserve to enjoy food,family, and traditions in
whatever form or fashion that isright for you without feeling
like you're interrogated.
You can be loving andself-honoring, you can hold
boundaries and be gracious andkind.
(11:54):
And you can enjoy the heck outof the season without abandoning
yourself.
So if this resonated, certainlysend it to someone who needs it.
And stay tuned for some moreholiday support episodes.
You got this, friend.
You are worthy, you are loved,and you are a beautiful and
(12:15):
wonderful soul, body, and mindinside and out.
Thanks for listening to the FindYour Edge podcast.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.
Two Guys, Five Rings: Matt, Bowen & The Olympics
Two Guys (Bowen Yang and Matt Rogers). Five Rings (you know, from the Olympics logo). One essential podcast for the 2026 Milan-Cortina Winter Olympics. Bowen Yang (SNL, Wicked) and Matt Rogers (Palm Royale, No Good Deed) of Las Culturistas are back for a second season of Two Guys, Five Rings, a collaboration with NBC Sports and iHeartRadio. In this 15-episode event, Bowen and Matt discuss the top storylines, obsess over Italian culture, and find out what really goes on in the Olympic Village.