"Fine" Dining

🦞 Joe’s Crab Shack (Part 2): Heavenly Shrimp, Sloppy Lob, & Dessert Scores 11 out of 10 🦞

After diving into the shady past of Joe’s Crab Shack, it was finally time to eat. In this episode, I head to the Disney-adjacent location with friend and podcast voiceover contributor Sandy Rose to see if the crab still holds up. From shockingly great coconut...

Joe’s Crab Shack has been serving seafood and sass since 1991 — but who is Joe? In this week’s episode, I dig deep into the murky origins of this kitschy crustacean-themed chain, uncovering mystery, missteps, and marketing that somehow works. From accidentally boozed-up babies to scandalous decorations and trans fat deception, Joe’s has made some serious waves. Plus, I’m joined by longtime friend and podcast voice Sandy Rose to que...

We finally ate at Panera Bread — and while the bakery items impressed, the rest of the experience was a chaotic medley of kiosk confusion, bathroom code injustice, and raw onion overload. I’m joined once again by Lyss Johnson (comedian, friend, and former Panera employee) as we break down every detail of our in-person visit to the iconic soup-slinging, salad-stacking chain.

Can the cinnamon crunch bagel save this spot from mediocri...

🚨 Panera Bread: Infinite Refills, Chicken Fights & Lemonade Lawsuits 🚨

From a humble Missouri bakery to one of the most recognizable fast-casual chains in the country, Panera Bread has been on a wild ride. This week, I dive deep into the breadbasket of chaos that is Panera’s history — including aggressive ad campaigns, billion-dollar innovations, and a beverage scandal that stirred national headlines. Plus, I’m joined by Lyss Joh...

🍦 We Drove 2 Hours for Dairy Queen – Was It Worth It? 🍦

We hit the road and drove nearly two hours to the nearest Dairy Queen Grill & Chill to finally see if there’s more to DQ than just frozen nostalgia. We tried three burgers (including a surprisingly delicious Flamethrower), fries, onion rings, chicken tenders, and two iconic desserts—the B...

Dairy Queen is more than just ice cream—it was one of the first fast-food chains to take over America. In this episode, we dive into how a self-proclaimed chemist helped perfect soft serve, why DQ dominated the 1950s, and the moment that changed everything: the invention of the Blizzard.

Joining me is writer & director Tyler...

After avoiding it for over a decade, I finally stepped back inside a Taco Bell—and I was not ready for what I found. The Baja Blast? Genuinely delicious. The Crunchwrap Supreme? A smart design, poorly executed. The

Taco Bell Is the Most Creative Fast Food Restaurant—But At What Cost?

Taco Bell is the fast-food chain that isn’t afraid to get weird. Over the years, they’ve served up bold (and sometimes questionable...

Subway’s reputation has been circling the drain for years—but is it really as bad as people say? We tried a bunch of footlongs and we've got thoughts.

This week, Terral Wells joins me to put the country’s most common fast-food chain to the test. From a pretzel drier than the Mojave Desert to an interior design aesthetic that actively made Terral upset, we break down every moment of our subpar...

Subway’s history is WAY messier than you think. Sure, it’s the biggest fast-food chain in America, but behind the Eat Fresh™ branding lies a disastrous past filled with lawsuits, bizarre marketing stunts, and yes… Jared Fogle.

In this episode, Terral Wells joins me to uncover Subway’s wildest moments, from its humble beginnings as a way to fund med school to the time they got sued because their footlongs weren’t actually a foot lon...

Hooters Casino Hotel—now rebranded as OYO Hotel & Casino—has been called the worst hotel on the Vegas Strip. But is it really that bad? We put it to the ultimate test by spending 19 hours trapped inside, eating Hooters for dinner AND breakfast (because yes, this is the only Hooters in the country that serves breakfast).

And if that wasn’t enough? We also hit up Aussie Heat (a male strip show), sang Dear Theodosia at karaoke (to eve...

Hooters Casino Hotel was meant to be a game-changer—bringing its busty brand of mediocrity to the Las Vegas Strip. Instead, it became one of the biggest disasters in Vegas history. A casino so bad, it made Circus Circus look classy. So... what went wrong?

For my third annual Hooter Bowl Spectacular, I had to go big. So I spent 19 hours trapped inside the Hooters Casino Hotel (now OYO), enduring its busted elevators, depressing ambi...

They thought I was sent from corporate!

• McDonald's Breakfast is arguably the most desirable form of McDonald's, and my Ronald McDonald-looking-ass got to chow down on it with the king of the clowns, Clown Boss Chad Damiani!
  
• The Good: I got treated like a king for coming in dressed as Ronald (and I don't think they knew I wasn't sent from the higher-up...

A magic belt that produced burgers?

• It's before 10:30am, which means it's time for McDonald's Breakfast! Learn the history of this iconic (and, in my opinion: better) half of McDonald's menu before diving into the clown lore of Ronald McDonald himself with the Clown Boss Chad Damiani
  

"I don't have a lot of respect for a meatball!"

• IKEA Swedish Bistro has a tough battle if it wants to be taken seriously on its culinary merits. Does it stake its claim as a contender in the pantheon of viable restaurants? Dropout's Chris Grace joins me to evaluate!
  
• The Good: The cafeteria set up (for Chris), the garlic bread, many of the desserts, the...

Food from a furniture store?

• I'm joined by Chris Grace from NBC's Superstore to tackle the largest furniture retailer in the world IKEA and their fabled Swedish Bistro which happens to be the 6th-largest food chain internationally!
  
• "Coffee and a biscuit" was where it all began in Sweden
• Despite ...

We come bearing gifts!

• Arctic Circle seemed like the best place to review with Santa Claus in tow, so we took a road trip out to southern Utah to try it!
  
• The Good: the mini corn dogs were genuinely great, and Santa brightened a few patrons' days by having gifts for the children!
• The Not Good: Someone complained to management about af...

Road trip to Utah!

• What a get! This week, I had the honor of taking Santa Claus himself to the restaurant that makes the absolute most sense to review with Kris Kringle: Arctic Circle. If you don't know it, think Dairy Queen Grill & Chill. They do the dipped cone thing but more importantly, they claim to have invented fry sauce
  
• Not only do we get the h...

I love CPK, but not for the pizza!

• California Pizza Kitchen is such a favorite of mine, I'm surprised it took 70 episodes to get to it! My guest, comedian Holly Brown is just as passionate about this chain as I am, so this was a great time
  
• The Good includes my favorite salad ever, Holly & my pasta dishes, & the vibes
• The Not Good: T...