How Striving to Be Better Than Others Makes Us Worse / Miroslav Volf

What if our relentless drive to be better than others is quietly breaking us?

Miroslav Volf unpacks the core themes of his 2025 book, The Cost of Ambition: How Striving to Be Better Than Others Makes Us Worse. In this book, Volf offers a penetrating critique of comparison culture, diagnosing the hidden moral and spiritual wounds caused by competition and superiority.

Drawing on Scripture, theology, philosophy, literature, and our culture’s obsession with competition and superiority, Volf challenges our assumptions about ambition and identity—and presents a deeply humanizing vision of life rooted not in being “the best,” but in receiving ourselves as creatures made and loved by God.

From Milton’s depiction of Satan to Jesus’ descent in Philippians 2, from the architectural rivalry of ancient Byzantium to modern Olympic anxieties, Volf invites us to imagine a new foundation for personal and social flourishing: a life free from striving, rooted in love and grace.

Highlights

1. “The key here is for us to come to appreciate, affirm, and—importantly—love ourselves. Love ourselves unconditionally.”
2. “Striving for superiority devalues everything we have, if it doesn’t contribute to us being better than someone else.”
3. “The inverse of striving for superiority is internal plague by inferiority.”
4. “In Jesus, we see that God’s glory is not to dominate but to lift up what is low.”
5. “We constantly compare to feel good about ourselves, and end up unsure of who we are.”
6. “We have been given to ourselves by God—our very existence is a gift, not a merit.”

Helpful Links and Resources

• Visit faith.yale.edu/ambition to get a 40-page PDF Discussion Guide and Full Access to 7 videos
• The Cost of Ambition by Miroslav Volf (Baker Academic, May 2025)
• Philippians 2:5–11 (NIV) – Christ’s Humility and Exaltation – BibleGateway
• Romans 12:10 – “Outdo one another in showing honor” – BibleHub
• Paradise Lost by John Milton – Project Gutenberg
• Paradise Regained by John Milton – Project Gutenberg

Show Notes

Opening Reflections on Competition

• The conversation begins with Volf recalling a talk he gave at the Global Congress on Christianity & Sports.
• He uses athletic competition—highlighting Lionel Messi—as a lens for questioning the moral value of striving to be better than others.
• “Sure, competition pulls people up—but it also familiarizes us with inferiority.”
• “We compare ourselves to feel good… but end up feeling worse.”
• Introduces the story of Justinian and Hagia Sophia: “Oh Solomon, I have outdone you.”

Rivalry, Power, and Insecurity

• Shares the backstory of Juliana’s competing church and the gold-ceiling arms race with Justinian.
• “Religious architecture became a battlefield of status.”
• Draws insight from these historic rivalries as examples of how ambition pervades religious life—not just secular.

Modern Parallels: Yale Students’s & the Rat Race

• Volf notes how even Yale undergrads—once top of their class—feel insecure in comparison to peers.
• “They arrive and suddenly their worth plummets. That’s insane.”
• The performance-driven culture makes stable identity nearly impossible.

Biblical Illustration: Kierkegaard’s Lily

• Volf recounts Kierkegaard’s retelling of Jesus’s lily parable.
• A bird whispers to the little lily that it’s not beautiful enough, prompting the lily to uproot itself—and wither.
• “The lesson: we are destined to lose ourselves when our value depends on comparison.”

Intrinsic Value and the Image of God

• “We need to discover the intrinsic value of who we are as creatures made in the image of God.”
• Kierkegaard and Jesus both show us the beauty of ‘mere humanity.’
• “You are more glorious in your humanity than Solomon in his robes.”

Theological Anthropology and Grace

• “We have been given to ourselves by God—our lives are a gift.”
• “We owe so much to luck, to others, to God. So how can we boast?”
• Paul’s challenge in 1 Corinthians: “What do you have that you have not received?”

Milton and Satan’s Ambition

• Shifts to Paradise Lost: Satan rebels because he can’t bear not being top.
• “Even what is beautiful becomes devalued if it doesn’t prove superiority.”
• In Para