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July 27, 2025 137 mins

One-Act Play Collections - Book 14, Part 1

Title: One-Act Play Collections - Volume 14

Overview: Here, in our 14th collection, are 10 One-Act Plays for your enjoyment. They range from the farm to the courtroom to the palace throne room; from the time of suffragettes to the (at the time) far distant future of 1999; and two of them have the word "sweet" in their titles. Short gems to make you laugh, cry, think, or all three. A one-act play is a play that has only one act and is distinct from plays that occur over several acts. One-act plays may consist of one or more scenes. The 20-40 minute play has emerged as a popular subgenre of the one-act play, especially in writing competitions. One-act plays make up the overwhelming majority of Fringe Festival shows including at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. The origin of the one-act play may be traced to the very beginning of recorded Western drama: in ancient Greece, Cyclops, a satyr play by Euripides, is an early example. The satyr play was a farcical short work that came after a trilogy of multi-act serious drama plays. A few notable examples of one-act plays emerged before the 19th century including various versions of the Everyman play and works by Moliere and Calderon. One act plays became more common in the 19th century and is now a standard part of repertory theatre and fringe festivals.

Published: Various

Series: One-Act Play Collections

List: One-Act Play Collections, Play #31

Author: Various

Genre: Plays, Theater, Drama

Episode: One-Act Play Collections - Book 14, Part 1

Book: 14

Volume: 14

Part: 1 of 3

Episodes Part: 4

Length Part: 2:17:38

Episodes Volume: 10

Length Volume: 5:39:27

Episodes Book: 10

Length Book: 5:39:27

Narrator: Collaborative

Language: English

Rated: Guidance Suggested

Edition: Unabridged Audiobook

Keywords: plays, theater, drama, comedy, hit, musical, opera, performance, show, entertainment, farce, theatrical, tragedy, one-act, stage show

Hashtags: #freeaudiobooks #audiobook #mustread #readingbooks #audiblebooks #favoritebooks #free #booklist #audible #freeaudiobook #plays #theater #drama #comedy #hit #musical #opera #performance #show #entertainment #farce #theatrical #tragedy #one-act #StageShow

Credits: All LibriVox Recordings are in the Public Domain. Wikipedia (c) Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License. WOMBO Dream. ToddHW.

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Episode Transcript

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(00:00):
The Lover by Gregorio Martinez Sierra, this is a LibriVox
recording all LibriVox. Recordings are in the public
domain for more information or to volunteer, please visit
librivox.org. The queen read by Jen Broda.

(00:20):
The lover read by Todd, the lady-in-waiting read by Sonia
stage, directions read by Larry Wilson, Solon in a Royal Palace
although of extreme richness theFurnishings preserve an
atmosphere as Simplicity. The stage is empty.

(00:42):
When the curtain Rises loud, shouts and cries are heard
outside as if an accident were taking place, then various
noises follow clamor and confusion after a moment.
The queen enters followed by thelady in waiting.
The queen is a beautiful woman gound.
In faultless taste. She is about 40 years of age.

(01:05):
Her hair is very dark except fora solitary white lock which
appears almost directly above the middle of her forehead.
But this she does not attempt toconceal by any artifice she
enters in full regalia. As if a tired for some Court
ceremony, from her shoulders. Hangs the Royal Metal, The

(01:26):
lady-in-waiting is about 60 years of age, rather nobly
plane. She also is in full court dress.
The queen as she leaves the lady-in-waiting who attempts to
support her? No, let me be.
I am not hurt. It is nothing.
Yes, your majesty suffered. No injury.

(01:47):
None, I assure you. Oh, but the shock the Fright, be
seated. Your majesty.
She assist her to remove the court battle.
Your majesty must rest. At least drink a glass of water.
The queen sitting herself in an armchair, you may bring the
water but I will have nothing init.

(02:08):
Let it be as pure as God made it.
The lady-in-waiting brings the water from a table which stands
nearby but your majesty it is cold.
Your majesty is overheated. Give me the glass.
She takes it from the lady in waiting.
You are trembling all over your majesty.

(02:31):
You have no idea how frightened,I was, how frightened we all
were, when the horses reared in the traces, your majesty can
imagine the overturn the code. Shattered into pieces, your
majesty thrown upon the ground, the queen smiling.
Fortunately, there was somebody waiting to receive me.

(02:53):
How fortunate that that man? Laughing, my knight errant was
so near lady-in-waiting displeased.
Certainly your majesty. The queen looking at her for a
moment then laughing, we shall have to award him.
Him the Grand Cross are, you frowning your majesty?

(03:19):
But what is the matter? What is on your mind?
Your majesty. That men was unmanned aerial and
impertinent, your majesty will not be displeased but his
deportment was horribly incorrect to catch your majesty
in his arms without permission. Yes.
If he had allowed me to break myneck, his conduct would have

(03:42):
been more Correct. In that case he would not have
committed a breach of etiquette.No, indeed it is not every day
that a woman even if she is a queen is in Peril of her life
and has the experience of being saved from Death in a Gallants
arms, your majesty amuses herself.

(04:04):
Perhaps I do but not unkindly orfellow, however, you may malign
him as much as you like, Like you Majesty.
I do not malign him when I suggest that it is incorrect and
impertinent for this person to follow your majesty.
Wherever you go, the queen laughing like my shadow like a

(04:29):
rude inbred fellow who is ignorant as decency and of the
requirements of a t. KET, your majesty never leaves
the palace but that he is standing on the pavement
opposite, you Go to church or tothe theater, or visit the parks
or attend any public ceremony. But that he is there in the

(04:51):
front row, yes, or nearer than the front row, as he was today.
Fortunately, for me, Your Majesty.
Loyal vessels were not wanting to fly to your Majesty's
assistance. The queen gently.
Yes. So I saw, when the horses,
reared half a dozen Dukes, Beganto run but what with etiquette

(05:15):
which kept them at a safe distance and rheumatism which
would not permit them to run. My Royal person was in grave
danger, all laughing indeed if it had not been for him skulking
in the Bramble Bush, like a lover in comic Opera love is no
respecter of hiding places. It is foolish to laugh at Hidden

(05:39):
lovers even in comic Opera besides What do you say was a
Bramble Bush appeared to me to be a laurel.
And men take us naturally to Laurels and nowadays as they
did, and the time of pet rock, some of the leaves.
Have even clung to my robe, picking off two or three.

(05:59):
Almost enough to weave a crown for my lover.
Your majesty, surely does not imply.
That, that man is in love. Why not?
Don't you think? So he is utterly deficient
lacking? How do we know perhaps?
He may be an anarchist, but how stupid in the 20 years?

(06:24):
He has followed me. He never yet has found an
opportunity, your majesty, the queen laughing.
How is showing disrespect does your majesty consider that this
extraordinary? Lucian shows, no disrespect but
what has become of him. Where is he?

(06:45):
He has been detained, where for,what reason for having
introduced himself without permission into the palace
Gardens, to save the life of hisQueen.
The end justifies, the means your majesty.
He could scarcely have been advised beforehand that your

(07:06):
Majesty's coach who has to be overturned.
And at that particular spot in the palace, Gardens the new do
not believe in presentiments your majesty.
I am too old for such things. The queen with a note of
melancholy in her voice. So am I for such things?

(07:28):
Your majesty. No, we both know how old I am
and so does the world to creating her age is not one of
the prerogatives of a queen. Taking up a hand glass.
She gazes into it attentively. Horrible.
Is it not your majesty is marvellously Young even?

(07:49):
So Marvel's do not last long. Whenever I look into the mirror,
I am aghast at the wrinkles which I shall find their very
soon. I know to where they will come.
Indicating her eyes and mouth. They show already when I laugh,
huh? When she is 20, how careless?
Lessly a woman laughs, putting down the mirror.

(08:12):
When I laugh, I cover my face with my fan.
When I am 40, I shall have all the palace mirrors broken.
She recites simply when forty Winters shall besiege thy brow.
You work all Shakespeare's sonnet when forty Winters shall
besiege thy brow and dig deep trenches in thy Beauty's field,

(08:35):
thy youths proud Livery. So gazed on Now will be a
tattered weed of small worth held.
Then being asked where all thy beauty lies, where all the
Treasure of thy Lusty days to say, within thy own deep sunken
eyes were an ill eating, shame and thriftless, praise.

(08:58):
How much more praise deserved thy, Beauty's use.
If thou couldst answer this Fair, child of mine, shall sum
my count and make my old excuse.He's proving his Beauty by
succession thine. This were to be made new when
thou art old and feel thy blood,warm, when thou feel'st it cold,

(09:20):
say I have never had a child. You Majesty affectionately but
disapprovingly your majesty has no right to consider such a
thing. No, of course, not.
Ah, smiling again, do you suppose he could be a poet?

(09:43):
Why a poet? Why not, in any case we shall
soon know we shell how I shall ask and learn his answer.
Surely, your majesty does not intend to receive him.
Precisely what your majesty. He's nobody in that case, we

(10:06):
shall become acquainted, Maury Sulli.
I shall offer him my thanks yourMajesty's.
Government will thank him officially, but he has saved me
personally and I shall thank him.
Personally, I will receive him. Now your majesty, if there is
nothing else that you wish to suggest unless your majesty has

(10:30):
changed her mind. No, do not be alarmed.
There is nothing to fear. Aah.
And I will receive him alone as your majesty commands.
She goes out the queen again. Takes the mirror and gazes into
it fixedly with a woman's Instinct as she rearranges her

(10:52):
hair, then laughs at herself andleast the mirror down again when
forty Winters shall besiege thy brow.
The lady in waiting and the lover appear in the doorway, he
is 40 years of age, neither wellner badly dressed, he wears
a black suit. His beard is pointed his hair,

(11:13):
somewhat long and slightly touched with gray.
He comes forward greatly agitated, the lady-in-waiting
retires, your majesty, no, come in the lover advancing.
A step did making a reference. Your majesty, come nearer, your

(11:35):
majesty. I have sent for you to offer.
My thanks. I do not deserve them.
Your majesty will come and it was a happy chance that brought
you into the garden? Yes.
Your majesty. Yes.
And I am deeply grateful to you.No, your majesty.

(11:55):
No. But I am indeed.
I am your majesty. He will decide.
But how is it that you were ableto gain admission to the
gardens? Very simply in spite of my
guards, your majesty. It was not the fault of your
guards. I climb the wall at the rear by

(12:16):
the plane trees. Out of sight of the guards in
broad daylight. No your majesty last night, your
majesty must not be alarmed. But the wall is very high there.
You might have injured yourself.No, your majesty.
I am used to it used to it? Yes.

(12:36):
Your majesty on Saturdays, the factory shots down over Sunday.
So I am not obliged to work. I have plenty of time.
I can sleep where I like, do youspend the night in the open air
in the garden? It is very pleasant in the
summertime. Do you mean that in Winter?
Just the same? Yes, your majesty.

(12:57):
She makes a gesture of astonishment.
Only when it freezes, I go into the house.
Where the orangutan? Your majesty keeps him now.
On the further side of the partay.
Don't be alarmed. Your Majesty.
We are great friends. He is very fond of Tarts and
roast chestnuts. So you see.
There is no danger. Great Heaven.

(13:18):
Is it possible? Are you in your right mind?
Yes, your majesty. But my good man.
What is the object of exposing yourself in midwinter in this
fashion in such Singular company.
Your Majesty of really, I don't know whether or not I should
tell you but you must your majesty every night before you

(13:43):
retire. And when you get up in the
morning your majesty comes out upon the terrorists before your
apartments in the evening. You look up at the stars in the
morning, you feed the white doves.
Yes, I do. Poor things, I like to toss them
a few Falls of corn. Pull over interrupting Indian

(14:04):
corn. How do you know the wind usually
carry some grains off the Terrace?
Do you pick them up? Yes, your majesty when I can
which is not often the paths areswept every morning.
So when Night Comes they are no longer there.
What do you keep them? Yes, your majesty.

(14:25):
I have a collection of souvenirs.
The grains of corn, a feather from your Majesty's hat, which
blew out one day. While you were driving a piece
of fur from one of your Majesty's, boas, would you wore
at the last Carnival? It caught in the railing as your
majesty left. The stand a coin.
Your majesty through from your coach to a little beggar boy in

(14:45):
the street. A tortoiseshell hairpin, which
fell into the garden one morning.
Along with the corn, a pair of gloves to of your Majesty's
flippers. I purchased them from a made of
one of the ladies of the Wardrobe and I don't know what
else you see it as a little Museum.
And Englishmen offered me a thousand Pounds Sterling for it.

(15:06):
The queen interested. What did you do?
Your majesty. The heart is not for sale.
You must be rich. No your majesty.
I was that is to say Rich enough.
I have made a good living but now I am poor.
Have you lost your money? Yeah.

(15:28):
Yes, your majesty. But we will not speak of that.
It is of no interest to your majesty, but it is.
It interests me very much. May I ask how I lost my money.
Yes, your majesty. It is not a secret.
Even if it were says, it is yourmajesty.
I spent it upon Railway tickets.Sea voyages, rooms at hotels.

(15:51):
Your majesty is such a great traveler.
Were you following me? He nods his head in.
In a sense but this is incredible.
No, your majesty. No traveling is very expensive,
as long as your majesty remainedin Europe.
It was not so bad, but when you made a voyage to India and

(16:12):
another, to the ferret Chicago and immediately after a
pilgrimage to the holy land, didyou follow me even as far as
India. Yes.
Your majesty. Your majesty will remember that
the voyage was undertaken on account of your head.
Your majesty may not know it butthe doctors agreed that it was a
question of life and death. It was necessary for you to have

(16:35):
a change of climate. Thanks, be to God your majesty
recovered, but you might have died on the journey.
Your majesty will understand that under the circumstances.
It was impossible for me to remain in Europe, impossible.
Absolutely. But I cannot consent to have.
You spend your fortune like this.

(16:56):
Your majesty do not give it another thought.
Thought it was not exactly a gold mine.
A few thousands that was all thefactory which I had the honor to
mention to your majesty. The unrivaled makers of butter
and cheese purveyors to your majesty.
Yes, indeed. It was mine.
Now it belongs to another that is all but you, I'm assistant

(17:19):
bookkeeper. Now I check up the accounts that
must pay you very little Zsa, nothing to speak of.
It is a humble position. Believe me Your Majesty.
I am capable of much more than that.
If not proprietor, I might stillhave been manager or Foreman.
At least only only only your majesty will not be displeased,

(17:44):
but I must keep my time free. The fact is, well, I have taken
this position because it gives me a living and looking down at
his clothes and enough to appearrespectable because it requires
only two. Two hours a day from 9:30 until
11:30, in the morning, preciselythe hours at which your majesty

(18:05):
confers with your ministers. Your majesty will understand the
queen laughing has certainly hadthat same hour.
We are both at the office. No, no your majesty, your
majesty misinterprets. My meaning.
I never presume to think the fact is well between those

(18:26):
hours. My mind is most free.
Able to work without distractionto apply myself.
I am sure that your majesty is not upon the streets.
How long do you expect to continue this life?
As long as I am, able your majesty and your majesty does
not prevent your majesty is not offended at what I have said
offended. No but you must be very unhappy,

(18:52):
no, your majesty, very happy, very happy that is not as happy
as I was. I was because now when your
majesty Leaves Court, I am not always able to travel rascally
coin. But fortunately, now your
majesty travels less, it will not do to ask too much of a
fortune your majesty after what happened.

(19:15):
This morning, I am repaid for everything which I have suffered
in the world. Your majesty could not imagine
how happy it makes me. That that is your majesty could
not imagine how glad I am that. This incident although I would
have given my life to have prevented it.
I mean your majesty understands what?

(19:37):
I mean? Yes.
Yes I do do not distress yourself.
I too am glad that it was you your majesty?
Because I have noticed your facefor so many years.
I have seen you for so long, a time your majesty has noticed me
naturally. Perhaps your majesty thought

(19:58):
that I was a photographer. Therefore one of the Illustrated
papers. I thought that you were a poet.
No, your majesty. No never have you.
Never written a versus the lover.
Disappointed does your majesty like versus?
Yes, I am very fond of them goodness gracious.

(20:18):
No, your majesty. No, never never a bright anemia,
but I know by heart. Almost all the verses which had
been published about your majesty birthday.
Versus versus celebrating your victories.
Your works of Charity and so on.And so on, there are so many of
them your majesty of course knows them too.

(20:39):
Not those verses smiling. God bless us but you must not be
troubled. One may be a poet and yet not
right. Versus does your majesty think?
So certainly we may write poetryor we may live, it deeply
affected and do. Of ocean and self-denial

(21:01):
illusion and dreaming. The sacrifice of one's life to
an ideal, an impossibility. These things are also true
poetry. Great.
Poetry are they not the lover not understanding?
No, tell your majesty. No doubt.
Of course since your majesty says so and you are a great poet

(21:24):
of Life. Your majesty says so.
And Because you are in memory ofthis day of this event which
also is an extraordinary one. In my life, I'm going to give
you a present to add to that collection, which you tell me
of. And I hardly know because of
your delicacy, your sacrifices really.

(21:46):
Will you accept this remembrancefrom me?
She offers him a jewel, which she wears upon her breast?
No, no, your majesty. No, by no means really not that
Jewel. No.
No. No.
But why not? Because a jewel is a jewel that
is it has value in itself and no, your majesty.

(22:10):
No, no, I do not wish to give offense.
No, your majesty. No, it is not that it is the way
I feel a Caprese if your majestywould deign to give me some
reminder, something personal perhaps of no value as you
Shush. If you would, let me have that

(22:31):
mirror. Your majesty after looking into
it once the queen looks into themirror and then hands it to the
lover. There, your majesty.
Thanks, your majesty will permitme to kiss your hand.
He kisses it thanks, thanks yourmajesty.
Believe me, Your Majesty deeply moved.

(22:52):
This is the happiest day of my life.
I too am. Greatly obliged to you, and I
wish Wish to ask you a favor. If at any time you desire
anything anything which is within my power to Grant, you
will do me a great kindness by coming.
To me, the lover hesitating wishing to ask something, your

(23:14):
majesty now. Tell me truly.
Is there? Nothing that you wish your
majesty? Since your majesty has been so
kind if your majesty would exertyour influence with the minister
of the interior. Carrier to have him.
Grant me a pass over the railways of the Kingdom.
You shall have it this very day is there nothing else.

(23:38):
What is your name? Matthew your majesty, Matthew
Brown, your Majesty's, humble servant the queen repeating the
word. So as to fix them in her memory,
Matthew Brown, you shall have itthis afternoon.
Now you may retire, she strikes a small, Silver Bell and many

(23:59):
Thanks yet again to the lady-in-waiting who enters let
this gentleman, be escorted to his home and a note be made of
his address, she boughs dismissing him, your majesty
bowing very low, he is about to disappear but as he reaches the
door he turns and says it did need not be.

(24:22):
First class goes out. The queen Disturbed pacing up
and down the room without knowing whether to laugh or to
cry. Matthew Brown, Matthew Brown to
the lady-in-waiting who re-enters has he gone?
Yes, your majesty. But your majesty is unwell.

(24:44):
Has this man given offense? He has been impertinent.
No, no. On the contrary poor fellow.
Was he a poet? A poet.
Know that is yes in his way. Imagine.
But how can you imagine my God? This poor man has given his life

(25:05):
for me for to him. His cheese factory was his life
for centuries ago, he would havefought under my banners.
He would have conquered a kingdom for my sake.
He would have discovered a new world and have laid it at my
feet. And now now, Now to see me feed
corn to the doves, he sleeps in a cage with the orangutan and

(25:30):
his name is Matthew Brown. Matthew Brown, the lover, the
poet was, right? We have been born too late into
a world which has grown too old curtain.
End of the Lover, by Gregorio Martinez Sierra.

(25:55):
England's, Easter by George Logan.
This is a LibriVox recording allLibriVox recordings are in the
public domain for more information or to volunteer.
Please. Visit librivox.org dramatis
personae. Jesus read by Larry Wilson,
Martha read by Vidya, Mary read,but Sonia, Britannia read by

(26:21):
Michelle, eaten narrated by David Purdy.
England's Easter by George Loganseen one Bethany anno domini 33
hot tub in here. My Lord my brother had not died
but he now asked of God. It shall not be denied.

(26:43):
Thy brother shall rise again? I know Lord he shall rise.
Is thou Dost say in the resurrections latter day.
I am the resurrection and can give unto the Dead new life that
they may live. Mary weeping.
If thou hadst been here, my brother had not died.

(27:05):
She wept and all the mourners with her cried, Jesus wept.
Take you away the Stone from offthe grave.
They rolled away the Stone from off the cave, then Jesus spake,
and Lazarus obeyed. The word come forth which Jesus

(27:26):
to him said, Seen to England anno, domini, 1894, those pull
submerged. I shudder at their fate.
If Christ were here, he'd saved them from that state.
She weeps and all her mourners with her weep or those submerged

(27:50):
sunk in the mire. So, deep Jesus weeps, I am the
resurrection and can give unto the Dead new life that they may
live roll. Ye away the stone.
The stone is rolled away and youcan see today, full many a
resurrection from the dead of many dossers whom from out

(28:15):
there. Submerged tomb, to them is spoke
come forth, which Jesus said TisEaster in our land around on
every hand, the buried flowers are rising from the earth.
The birds are singing to and sinners.
Not a few are proving. Now, the joys of second birth.

(28:39):
End of England's Easter by George Logan.
The Bloomer costume or the figure of Fun by Edward
Sterling. This is a LibriVox recording all
LibriVox recordings are in the public domain.
For more information or to volunteer, please visit

(29:01):
librivox.org the Bloomer costumeor the figure of fun.
An original farce in one act by Edmund Sterling, Remarks.
There is no weapon. So, formidable as satire ably
directed against any Innovation.Upon the accepted rules of

(29:22):
society, turn anything successfully into ridicule and
it ceases to exist. This universally acknowledged,
power of ridicule has accomplished more to laugh down
the Bloomer costume than any unwarrantable interference by
Rude and vulgar Minds with the right of all to dress as they
think proper provided, they dress with modesty T can ever

(29:45):
affect persecution invariably creates proselytes?
It is this view of the case which has induced the publisher
to add this first to the list ofhis minor drama.
The part of Martha Bailey affords, a good actress ample
scope for the display of comic Talent while cockles.
The showman, his boy nabhi and the false-hearted Taylor, Joseph

(30:09):
jumps are sketches capable of being well.
Filled up enabled hands, the whole point of the piece
consists in the unfortunate position in which the wearer of
the Bloomer costume is placed asone of the supposed Curiosities
in the collection of cockles. Mr. Sterling seems to have
adopted the title. Merely add kept tandem for a

(30:30):
very amusing farce FCW cast of characters.
Christopher cockles, a showman read by Andrew Gonzales.
Not being Nick is boy read by Adrian, Stevens.
Joseph jumps a tailor faults andfickle read by Mike mental.

(30:50):
Akos Martha Bailey. A victim of circumstance and the
bloomer. Costume read by, devorah Alan
Miss Eliza Todd. A Baker's daughter, read by
Kelly Taylor, stage directions, read by David Purdy costume,
modern dress of 1851. The costume of Martha Bailey.

(31:13):
When changed is the most grotesque style of bloomer
dress. Consequence of wearing the
breaches extract from the Kirk session.
Register of Perth showing the consequence in former times of
putting on the brakes April 16th1632 conformed, to citation

(31:34):
compared Jane Gibson. A servant class and is accused
of indecent wantonness in putting on men's clothes upon
her. She answered that she simply
Drew upon her, a pair of bricks and cast them off immediately.
And she promised never to do thelike here after she is committed
to Ward to remain the space of three hours the Bloomer costume

(31:59):
or a figure of fun. Seen interior of a caravan of
waxwork An opening with a curtain Center, leading two
steps a small door. The scene is enclosed and the
roof, low resembling a show. Figure stuffed and in profile

(32:19):
stand around the stage separatedfrom the interior.
By a rope, a packing case on thestage a placard in large letters
on the walls cockles. Royal original waxwork noise of
drums, trumpets pandiyan pipes, Etc, outside and Loud.
Shouts cackles discovered opening packing case Cackles

(32:43):
taking up a printed Bill and fixing it.
Notice to the fairer sex look out ladies, She's Come.
The Bloomer just arrived from New York in two ships.
That's a hitter. I know nothing of management.
This bill must do the trick oncework upon the feelings and the
British Public's little Sixpencehas are sure to drop in dancing,

(33:07):
dogs, panoramas and can't of sent tragedy weeping to the
tomb. Put comedy to bed, waxwork is
the best Dodge. Now, people like to see Heroes
and housebreakers reduced to wax.
It makes a lasting impression onthem calls, Nick, Nick, where
the devil are you Nick without yeah, kavner enters from Trap

(33:31):
left hand. Well, I've been under the care
of an amending a Knoll Where TheBoys peeps in and sees the
images for nothing. You must bustle about Fair
Rosamund wants Wants a bowl of poison, Mary, Queen of Scots,
her nose, mended and Bonaparte has lost his crown serves him,
right? He's such a Restless image gives

(33:52):
me more trouble than the lock put together.
The Emperor of Russia is heads alittle out of order.
It's always hard enough about the pow.
Now, for the great feature of the collection, the Wonder
excitement, Etc. See public press the new female
Bloomer dress for the ladies regardless of expense.
I've For today, real figure and dress direct from America.

(34:16):
A model of the coming fashion and Revolution among the
petticoats goodbye to Frills flounces and street sweeping
trains, there will be a certain hundred percent saved the
husband's in Haberdashery bills.The thing must end in opens
case, starting murder ruin holdsup a figure in the Bloomer

(34:37):
costume broken. Well guess and calculate, she's
gone too. We more smash.
Oh yes laughs unfeeling Rascal, what excuse can I make to the
anxious public? Sorry.
She's been smashed on the rail. People are used to it.
Nowadays cockles. Piecing stage.
What's to be done? I must show the dress.

(35:00):
You won't do for a bloomer. No, I'm only a blossom, besides
corduroys and Wellington's don'tsuit the new Dodge, my rival.
Monsieur gamma Nene will draw all the money.
His exhibition. If we don't hit the right nail,
you're not over ugly Master, suppose you try the Bloomer
who's to beat the gong. Well, I will and attend to the

(35:22):
money. Well give it an honest attention
Ollie's. Mm, I'll coax them in this way
this way, walk forward. Yeah yeah no I prefer keeping my
own account, it saves chalk and adding up noise of voices,
music, Etc. The fair's began runs to L shall
open the doors and tell him to walk in.

(35:45):
There's a rush on the steps of agal on a basket.
Let's take her in for nothing. No, no, no, we dared.
Not the Caravan would be Torn toPieces scattered to the winds,
read that points to bill, which he shows the Bloomer Beauty
Beauties, the principal feature sits disconsolately.

(36:07):
Hey generally is everywhere shouts and drums without Five,
all the money next door. Tell the public that Steamboat
burst and the wax ran away. It is useless Voice without the
only waxwork cockles rushing to the opening.
No, no. I'm the only real waxwork.

(36:28):
The Royal cockles. The genuine cockles Rush forward
be in time. Look at the prices only
Sixpence, Nick, blows the pandiyan pipes.
Nick left hand removing Packaging.
In case the guvnors recovered his spirits, it ought to be a
shilling but I'll make you a present of Sixpence has that

(36:50):
touch them up. Try the speaking trumpet and
coaxing offer. Mm, I need to do some moment,
they won't take it, Germany, knees, drawing them all
beauties, ruined us. It's ruined a rare lot.
Besides us Master, Tell Em number members of parliament and
in newspapers submitted free quarries.

(37:12):
Genius is without a feather to fly with or a copper to spend
take off price and destroy the Dignity of the art know.
I love my profession too much for that.
I'd rather shut up and take a National Theater exits.
Left hand Nick stands at centered or Patty appears on the

(37:34):
steps astonished. Oh my oh dear.
Well I never that's why Mom walk.
Cup. Walk up being time.
If you please sir, are you the Royal waxwork?
Hi, I'm my dear all alive. Oh, all her life.
Oh, am I too late sir? Not a bit.
We've kept the king of Russia and pro, she waiting for you,

(37:56):
and put the performance off accordingly, not obliged to you,
sir. How much is it to pay?
Six months says the poultry charge, but we generally leaves
it to the feelings of the Gentryto give what they likes the
Gentry. He takes me from mrs.
I've borrowed her best gown, he won't think you're showing too
much. Not if it were twice as much,

(38:17):
more lady takes it, this is the first show I was ever in.
When I came up the steps, I feltquite Timber system.
My heart jumped about, like, a mouse in a mustard pot or no
trouble laughs the Mind naturally sinks under the
stupendous event. It must be a strong mind that
can stand against Masters tongueand trumpet.

(38:37):
And I was determined to come, mrs.
Wanted me to go a teetotaling. No, mum says, I to the fair,
I'll go. If I die for it, 22 and see.
Nothing but play actors and dancing, dogs, and suchlike
flimflam's. You're a gal of spirit.
I say that's a mistake and nothing stronger than weak tea
passes. My lips, I like coals.

(38:58):
I am bumming eight, having accepted the pledge.
When will the show begin? Because I'm tied to time where
generally attard to it. Sometimes Beyond it.
I'll exhibit The Collection myself were known a six months.
Maybe, hold the finest, the largest, the best Royal waxwork
in the world. It costs more money than you can
count. It ain't in Earnest, is it sir

(39:20):
for real Earnest and twice as natural as life.
Do me, how wonderful do they speak with their eyes?
We've shut up their mouth and give their tongues and holiday
points with wand. Now, we'll begin hadn't.
We better wait for the king of Russia and Russia since he was
so polite to stay for me, not a minute.
He's gone home to Art do now. Huh, Nick goes to the opening

(39:43):
center now, Governor, let Molineenter cockles with a quantity of
visitors, male and female children.
Etc. Speaking.
As he enters this way, my prettydears.
You pays your money here and then, yes, he's the show.
They each give him money and he exits Center calling this way.
This sway just going to begin, look to the right, my little

(40:07):
dear. You will observe the Delight of
the nobility and gentry. The old ancient lady the
Countess of sin Fitters, she waschristened after the dancer and
died dancing, mad of the island,fling, 195 years of age.
The animal is the Royal African Russian Irina measuring 14 feet

(40:29):
from the tip of his nose, to theend of his style and the same
distance back again, making in all 28 square.
Cubic feet. He or is in the woods in the
night season like a human being NG in distress and then devours
all that comes to his assistantsa sad, instance of the depravity
of human nature, turn your eyes to the left - oh dear and

(40:53):
they're Behold a famous female poisoner, Queen Catherine de
médecine the physic was named. After our, she actually poisoned
her victims by giving I'm small doses of Quicksilver and pickled
salmon, but they were cured by always pills.
To the right? My little deer stands.

(41:14):
Julius Chooser are great Irish General as he led in the foot,
guards against bony at the Battle of Waterloo nearing.
On the left sits a lovely maid of honor to King Solomon.
She unfortunately fell in love with a curly French lap dog.
Caught the phobia, took to barking and died in the dog

(41:35):
dies. How certain are there any Maids
of Honor alive now sir? Very few, my dear Yeah.
There's no honor among the modesonly tricks now, don't touch the
images eyes on and off. I'd give anything for my young
men to see this site. He'd never shut his eyes.
Again, you've got a young man. Then bless you.

(41:55):
I'm never without one sometimes too.
But I only regularly keeps company with one at a time.
Joseph jumps a tailor as my fondadmirer.
Now, though, sometimes the butcher will whistle, can't you
come out tonight down the Eyrie?Which makes Joseph quite lunatic
and he threatens to Himself in ajacket.
Oh no miss. You shall see the murderers and
Cutthroats in our chamber of or has walk around takes her hand

(42:20):
Patty breaking from him. No, no, I'd rather not.
If you please, I've had quite enough for my money.
There's plenty of murders in thepapers and I get the horrors
that home mrs. Gives me them, were written
about cold meat and candles. I wish she was at Old cockles.
Without Nick, Nick Talk of the devil Crossing to, right.

(42:41):
Right? Cockles re-entering sound the
gong. We mustn't go to sleep, I turn
them all out and then they'll beready to come in again that this
deters all depart Center, the boys shouting, Nick beats the
drum and blows the penny in pipes, Nick, giving money or if
exhibited such a green onion. She's fallen in love with the

(43:03):
images. Aside Sixpence for myself this
way, walk forward, exit up the steps with speaking trumpet How
do you sighs? Oh, I can't bear to tear myself
away from these lovely dresses. What gold and silver.
While I'm obligated to put up with poultry cotton.
Why wasn't I made of wax? Instead of clay, my case would

(43:26):
have been different then and Bows would have waited on me
instead of my waiting on the confounded Bells, you admire the
figures a mile of Beyond expression.
I could live here forever, onboard wages.
How long can you stay? Stay out till the flying horse
comes around with a 9:00 beer and idea strikes me she's young

(43:47):
and pretty and would make a NabiBloomer.
I'll try should you really like to be dressed?
Finally wears one of our sex that wouldn't I could help you
if you'd consent don't tempt me.Sir ribbons and laces are my
weaknesses in a word. One of my best figures, the star
of the west by an unlucky accident has had her head

(44:11):
Knocked off and her legs amputated, this ruins my
prospects. Now, if you will put on the
dress of the last fashion, and stand amongst the figures for an
hour or two, I'll give you five Shillings.
Make a figure of me of loveliness in the most becoming

(44:32):
dress in the world. The beautiful Bloomer.
Can't I be found out not if you remain still and keep your mouth
shut. Hmm.
That's a difficult thing for a servant of all work.
Considering if I wasn't afraid, I should like the fun of the
thing. Who's afraid think of the honor?

(44:53):
You're the only person. I would allow to stand among
such high nobility. Why the queen herself would
willingly change her crown for your five Shillings?
Would she go? But then it Wicked to Sham and
make-believe nonsense. Shams considered a virtue all
the way. Older Making Believe nowadays.

(45:14):
Let me persuade you miss young man.
So particular and Evangelical it.
Conjured, a play-acting, is it? Play-acting nothing.
So unfashionable. It belonged to the Fine Arts
sculpture and chiseling. Do it and I'll give you an extra
Joey my lollipops. I think I will mind only for an

(45:36):
hour, not a minute over step in their points to door, right?
We'll find the dress on the figure.
I'll paint your face. No, you won't.
I'm not going to have it smudgedover with brick dust.
Anything. You, please be quick with the
dress. I can put it on the bill.
Now runs to door here. Here she's come at last just

(45:58):
arrived. The ladies Delight of the
original Bloomer, blow the trumpet, Nick exit, down steps,
shouts and music. What is seen of Wonder.
And agitation I can scarcely keep my In everything is running
round. A total change for a shilling,
kings and queens and princes mixture for a back kitchen.

(46:19):
How am I dreams of all come round last night that ever was?
I dreamt that I dwelt in marble halls.
A gypsy fortune teller. Once told me I should live to be
a somebody besides myself, keep company with nobility, what a
study for, the natural Gallery jumps.
Would be struck with admiration and wonder, and for the first
time, the impressed with the value of the prize, he is one in

(46:41):
the law. Lottery of sweethearts.
He's getting impatient and wantsme to name the happy day.
I'm in. No great.
Hurry fearing matrimony, something like wedding cake.
All the sugar at the top. I dreamt I dwelt at Madame
Tussauds with Cutthroats and Kings by my side and all the wax

(47:03):
figures in those, abodes at midnight world or if I'd I'd To
William, the fourth sat down to smoke with Collins, who aimed at
his eyes and I also dreamt King how, what?

(47:24):
A joke dance, the polka with mistress Fry Dance, the polka,
the polka with mistress, right dance, the polka, the polka with
me stress from Why she dances eight bars of a polka comic?

(47:45):
I dreamt that Napoleon Bonapartewas Waltzing with, Madame
Tessier that O'Connell to study the regicide.
Act had a gossip with faciai andpain, making eyes with queen bed

(48:06):
as I saw and pit taking rug withfor folks.
And I also dreamt the sun meltedAllah, the nose of Lord Brougham
and vaux. The nose of the nose of Lord
Brougham and vaux. The nose of the nose of Lord

(48:26):
rahl Manville looks dances at the end of which brigands arms
move blow on drum exit. Right rapidly Nick peeps in
Center through the curtain. She's dressing up years ago
alive. Waxwork a novelty in Natural
History. It beats the singing Mouse and
the circus. All, oh, what insinuating?

(48:48):
Why is Master heirs with him to persuade?
The ignorant young creature? To might such a fool of herself,
though? It certainly don't require much
sense to make the poor girls do.Their, their heads are soft,
like lumps of Patty, and can be we'd all done squeezed into any
shape. All right, Governor.
She'll do it Beauties. The thing to tickle their fancy

(49:10):
cockles enters. Laughing.
Rubbing his hands, she'll frighten her.
If things go. Well, we shall get up and
excitement and pocket the tin after all.
Spies she moves, say she's hung on wires.
She mock cough, all the better made to imitate nature.

(49:32):
That's the ticket if she runs away, let her run the heart.
Melted. The wax.
Never think of failures success is our only Eject my boy once
get the Discerning public inside, Gammon and Imagination
will do the rest Nature's the philosophy.
I study my boy, it's the Showman's alphabet boy, studies

(49:52):
mischief. And it comes naturally Patty
within I can't put on these queer things.
If you please the ladies Delightbothers her.
We mustn't hear her hush. We're deaf runs up stage.
What a genius master has lying. Comes a, you see?
And the truth to him such a faceto all brass.

(50:15):
Then I never heard so much done with a speaking trumpet before
and he's rolls on the drum drive, one into fits when I give
something to equal him, but it ain't in me is a top of the
ladder who while I'm obliged to Old eat up.
She quiet. Nick nerds Capital peeps,
right-hand door to dress BecomesHer.

(50:35):
A real Beauty. Looks the character to a tee, a
real odd. 57pu is have no character too.
Look Master Pon, my word. She's a nice article to mind the
doors. We shall be ready to begin
directly. Not a word.
Nick going. I'm dumb.
I'll tell all the boys in the fair.
Aside, crikey is a go exit. Really a Charming little girl,

(51:00):
her smile makes the very hey Pants, dance in my pocket.
I wonder if she's got any Trifles in the Savings Bank and
happens to be of a confiding trusting.
Disposition conceals himself behind Figures Patty re-enters.
Speaking dressed Allah Bloomer, walks round to the stage in
waxwork. If you please, I'm very
uncomfortable in these outlandish, things.

(51:22):
My feelings don't simulate with them.
You never mentioned them to me, cockles points to the trousers.
Oh no, we never mentioned them, you'll become the Envy of your
sex. The glass of fashion, a living
Wonder all the folks will stare at me and waxwork.
I hope so please. Yourself near the dying.
Brigant next that ugly man with the dagger.

(51:46):
I should faint sir stand by the hero of a hundred fights.
No, fighting for my money. It's gone.
Clean out of fashion. Thank goodness.
You're right. Peace and plenty.
Is the motto to live and die under.
This will suit arm and arm with mrs.
Fry. Sure.
Hi, I'm in a nice to already these tomfool.

(52:07):
Things, arrest me. If Mother a mrs.
Ever heard of this they'd turn me out of doing.
Worse. They never will places her among
the figures. It's nothing when you're used to
it. Oh don't if you please.
I can't bear it pray, let me go.I'm gives way Nick peeping
Center curtain. Such a jolly lot on the steps

(52:28):
Master. Hold up your head.
Remember the money and the honor?
What a figure fun, Woke Up This Way.
This Way beats, the drum, brigands arm moves, Patty
screams and falls on a figure cockles, pulls her up.
Damn it don't. I'm beginning to go Nick laughs.
Keep your eyes shut. I can't look at the Dig.

(52:52):
Grrrr. Oh, do be sensible.
There's a good girl. I ain't a good girl.
I'm a bad girl to do this. Let me go.
She'll spoil all listen to reason.
I won't give me my lawful things.
These ain't fit for a Christian servant girl was 6 pounds a year
and for Sunday's out tries to move woman unfortunate woman,

(53:14):
she starts move an inch or speakand Guy Fawkes shall blow you
up. Hey, the fifth of November Yet,
do you see that dagger? Don't I oh Lord, another word
and it is buried in your heart. What my mother?
It's coming. Thanks to on the steps.
Won't stay any longer. The towers are spending their

(53:36):
money in the cock shiz and luckybags.
Which allows them to make ice guv'nor peeping through a hole
in the curtain. You hear a woman no more
nonsense. I've hired bought a side but
will never pay for you. Don't Rouse my Anger don't beard
the lion in his den. Exit left a lion, I believe you

(53:58):
and I'm one of his pups exit Center laughing.
Merciful gracious in a wild beast in, they keep them
underneath. I suppose, what will become of
me? There's no getting out.
If I scream, they may let him lose to devour me.
Weeps, his poor mother knew how I've been diluted from the right
way. What could have induced me to

(54:19):
come to the horrid Fair? Why wasn't I contented at Jumps
with a body Fairing and I might have seen the butcher on the sly
Nick open Center Joseph jumps and Miss Eliza Todd sholay,
dressed enter Patty shuts, her eyes walk forward.
Now you'll be out that a lot of the nobility and gentry the best
and most magnificent is collection of the uninhabitable

(54:43):
world there, those stand great burned, Little Women, Giants
towards Patriots and Cutthroats all more natural than life
pointing to a stuffed figure. Of a sailor.
That's the original William thatmarried Susan enlisted in the
blows and settled among the fleet in the Downs that chap
there's first cousin to Macbeth and the oldest son of Rob, Roy,

(55:04):
he invented the bagpipes and blowed himself to death.
I'll take your money now if you please, this is the out that old
sit none for myself and I see likes to give nothing extra.
There's the waxwork we shall show.
Directly that points to Paddy the Bloomer Dodge from Kentucky
it. It's like wax on a quacks life.

(55:24):
Allah, being time, being time, exit Center, dear me.
It's very peculiar. Nothing super fine about it.
A sort of betwixt and between garment life, a pot of
half-and-half and neither one thing or t'other, well, a
delicious pair of ducks, the figures awkward and not half as
natural as the others that voiceopens, her eyes starts, Chumps

(55:50):
my own, Joseph know, The all eyes, open and shocked, they all
do when they pull the wires behind love his love.
I thought, I was his only flame.How do you like her nose
know-it-all? It's a pug Patty, forgetting,
its false. Everybody knows it's a Roman.

(56:10):
Oh, dear, shut her eyes. I forgot I'm a figure.
You lies are looks round. Thank you here.
Anyway. Was baked the noise.
No, it's only an echo of imagination.
Those dresses are prime cloth, aren't they?
I hope you relish this little treat little tree.
My mind is filled with Rapture music and monkeys are

(56:33):
delightful. I shall always think of the
monkeys when I look at you did Joseph, dude.
Joseph snake blessed Betsy Patty's starts and groans.
Oh, how I long to call. Mine forever to make you a jumps
Embraces and kisses her. Don't doubt, I beg, she means

(56:56):
doodoo, and begs for more, I Shall Scream out soon.
I flush begins to crawl. Rather lucky to escape the farad
eyes of that, Martha Bailey, butshe's always on the watch, I
can't move for her evil glances Sarah dies, have I sir very
good. She bores me to death morning,
noon and night. Well, says you're rather.

(57:18):
So fond of her Joseph. Find a poison, I hate her rich,
and he found out. I was the idol of his soul
confess. You paid her some attention.
Never I've paid attention to thecupboard.
So there is every night. Free Gratis who threatens sides
money for beer, I fear, you are deceiver again a try Fleur.

(57:44):
I know he is No.1. My honor.
Hear me register. And Haas, they were here us
outside. Let them hear and see you're
mine. I defy the world in arms kisses
her. Oh, how I long to stitch you to
my side. Yeah.
Paul will be angry if he finds us out and we'll stop my pocket

(58:06):
money. He shan't.
He shall. I'll tell him, I've bought the
ring. That's the bind.
Our loving hearts shows ring, fits the hair tries it on.
I lent him, The money for one tobind our two, loving hearts
together. Oh, how I Pine for this
opportunity to open my mind and pour out the truth at your feet

(58:27):
blessed? Betsy you are an angel.
Let us swear to be true to each other like Romeo and Juliet in
the play. They kneel I swear Patty in a
hollow voice. So do I.
You've got a cold in the head. Sweet, I never spoke Rising but
I did. Throws brigands head at them.

(58:48):
Monster a blow on the drum brigands arms.
Move, rapidly. Oh, the Places home.
Horrible stuff. They're only in plays who's
there? I'll call the inspector.
Who are you? And murdered maid makes wry

(59:09):
faces. Oh dear, I want my poor jumps.
Trembling who did it jumps? Joseph jumps.
Oh Joseph. What have you been done with it?
Nothing it's fault. I never did anything but cabbage
or weskit. Give me back.

(59:29):
My young infant to. Oh my young affections that you
stole away. You never had any.
To steal music from Don. Juan Patty advancing slowly with
brigands dagger. So straighter, it was only in
fun NADA. Oh oh a picture of horror is

(59:53):
here. Formed Patty in the center with
dagger Patty standing over him. Prepare I ain't prepared.
If you please sir, I know, sir, but a myth unfortunate Miss
Bailey now. Do you know me villain deluder
a? No no, no.
Do I wish Patty sticks him with dagger?

(01:00:14):
Let this stir your memory up andthis this stop stop.
I know you now, dear Martha, you've touched my heart.
Dear Martha, Poor Pitiful Hedgehog hate me a and you stuck
up Miss Lizzie Todd. How dare you inveigle him here?
Spending my money, a your money,a borrowed, a shilling of me

(01:00:36):
besides making me Crete him to the depths and dogs and Spice.
It's nuts. Somebody must die for this
indignity who so fit as you too Lizzy, jumps.
Hey, deceived us. Both promising to marry me and
fly to California. That's where he promised to fly
with me. Retch, beat him, tiger, throws

(01:00:59):
brigands. Head at him and beats him.
Round the stage with the powdered wig of one of the
figures knocking, down the stuffed figures murder help,
help Chuckles and Nick Rush. In followed by mob male and
female Nick laughing. He falls over the figures is a
wind up for the light is Delight.

(01:01:20):
Oh crikey here here only a pennyKeepers about what the devil is
all this uproar about bigamy. Marrying double, call the
police. No no, I'm single and mean the
keep so Eliza shaking him then pay my Schilling back sir and
give me my ring to to bind my Loving heart to somebody else.

(01:01:42):
Snatches it who's to pay me for my broken images holding up
ahead. Ask that in edge of Despair.
I'm out of work and can't. Somebody must do it.
Take it out of the ten shillings, you promised me.
She's a nice girl, the Rings. Ready, without expense?
I want a partner. How should you like to settle

(01:02:03):
among the Royal waxwork? My love waxwork.
My heart melts. I'm an abandoned one.
Cockles is amazingly ugly. Oh, mrs.
Asher to give warning without character after this point to
clothes. I might do worse.
Consent say the word. Let me call you cockles.
Would you be constant and attentive as a tax gatherer?

(01:02:27):
I think I'll Venture, oh, cackles leans on his shoulder.
Nick, strikes? The drum loud.
Here's the ring. Pray.
How do you feel now? Mr. Jumps, never better.
Let me give you a Take your withmy heart blessing aside and glad
to get rid of her. Nick beats drum, baby.
In Todd being time, just going to begin, only a penny.

(01:02:51):
Shut up the show. I invite you to our wedding.
Will have a rare day of it. One word, if you please, mr.
C. I believe I have a voice in the
concern. Now, there's a great point to
settle before were married, especially as either.
Entered to assume a new style ofdress.

(01:03:12):
Ladies in a whisper permit me towhisper in confidence.
Mind how you try these new Notions as our American sisters
term them? They might laugh.
I don't mind it. In fact, I rather like it being
used to it. And I'm always ready to make a
figure of fun of myself, or assume any shape or dress that

(01:03:33):
may prove acceptable to you and raise a cheerful smile.
Finis curtain, end of the Bloomer costume or the figure of
Fun by Edward Sterling. Short and sweet by Al dollfuss,

(01:03:53):
Charles Thompson. This is a LibriVox recording all
LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more
information or to volunteer. Please visit librivox.org
characters, Master Suite of the stock exchange, a friend of
shorts read by Todd mr. Short of the stock exchange, a

(01:04:14):
friend of sweets read by Mike Mana.
Leykis Stephen a footman read byBy David Purdy.
Mrs. Sweet. Red, by Kelly, Taylor mrs.
Short ride by an Amiga Maria. Mrs. Sweets, made read by Sonia,
stage directions, read by Larry Wilson, seen short and sweet

(01:04:38):
sludging. Sneer, the Crystal Palace, a
handsomely furnished, apartment door Center, backed by landing
and staircase. Doors left, first entrance and
second entrance fireplace. Still flat Looking Glass over
metal piece bases in ornaments on a metal piece.
Fender fire-irons Etc door. Right second entrance, a large

(01:05:02):
round Table, Right? Late for lunch, and for four
chairs, and easy chair left of table, sofa against right?
In flat side board, against leftin flat, a work table and chairs
left foot stool near sofa. Mrs. Sweet is seen, right?
Arranging the remains of a luncheon from which she and mrs.

(01:05:24):
Short are supposed to have just risen mrs.
Short sitting working at table left, that's tiresome husband of
mine. What has he done with himself?
Compose yourself. My dear man of business.
You know are not always their own masters.
My good man. You see has not found his way
back yet. Oh are you quite spoiled mr.

(01:05:46):
Short, you know we don't Agree upon that subject calls.
Come, come William, come take your lunch.
Sweet within right door in one minute.
My dear. I'm only just drying.
My hands vexatious. We shall get the things cleared

(01:06:07):
away all day. Enter mr.
Sweet. Sorry to keep you waiting.
Couldn't help it upon my honor, just as I was leaving the office
as the Dews would have it in cash.
The gentleman on business, largetransfer of stalk, etc, etc.
And so I lost my train, never mind, there's plenty of time.

(01:06:29):
So I'll just snap up a bit of something and be ready in the
crack of a whip, sit at table, right?
And eats voraciously. Why how you're eating?
William one would think you hadn't tasted anything before
today? No more.
I have to speak of. I was so late this morning that
I was obliged to run away without my breakfast.

(01:06:50):
Oh mr. Sweet, how can you say so why I
helped you to half a dozen kidneys?
At least there wasn't one left in the dish for mr.
Short, when he came down after you left, ha ha ha, no.
Did you though? My impression was, I only took a
cup of tea eats for righteously,but the fact is, I have so much

(01:07:11):
upon my stomach. I mean, upon my mind in the way
of business that really, these things, make very little
impression. However, hang business for today
at all events. We shall have a splendid
afternoon for our ride. You'll enjoy it.
I know mrs. Short immensely.
Oh yes. Gotta shall of all things.

(01:07:32):
I haven't been out for a ride one since my marriage and I used
to be such a horsewoman no shortdoesn't like it.
I know I would like to see mr. Short on Horseback amazingly ha
ha ha ha since gilpin's right? To Edmonton.
Ha ha checking herself. And yet though, Henry is rather

(01:07:57):
inclining to be Stout. You must admit that he carries
himself remarkably well sweet tomrs.
Sweet really my dear. You are too severe upon short, I
beg your pardon Louise. I'm sure I'm such a simpleton, I
must always laugh when I shouldn't.
However I think you had better make your Arrangements

(01:08:19):
independently of him for although I don't want to be a
wet blanket. I am convinced you won't go.
No, no. I'll undertake to persuade him
when he comes in. Steven is seen to cross center
from right to left. Isn't that?
Steven going downstairs here. Steven interests even left

(01:08:41):
sitter step over the way to the Livery stables and tell them to
send round the horses. I chose on my way to town this
morning. Then go on to mr.
Billington's, my compliments andwe shall be happy to join him.
This afternoon for a ride at theappointed time. 2:00.
Let's see, where did that note? Say, we were to meet him mrs.

(01:09:02):
Short. Eagerly in front of the Crystal
Palace. Ah, exactly.
Don't forget. Steven two o'clock.
Precisely two o'clock sir. Yes, sir exit left Center Suite
rising and rubbing. His hands come.
That's nicely. Used, we shall have a Charming
ride over to dulwich, see the pictures and get back in plenty

(01:09:24):
of time to dress before. We start to dine with Billington
and then with the box at the Opera, which he has.
So politely presented us with, we shall have made out the day
in a very Superior. And I think I may almost venture
to say aristocratic manner. Come ladies, make haste, get
your habits on or the horses will be here before you are
ready. And, you know, I can't bear to

(01:09:46):
be kept waiting. I like that.
Vossler, what's the matter? You can't be kept waiting, but
you don't mind keeping other people waiting.
Then to I am to be ordered aboutat betting call, everything
arranged for me beforehand. I think, at least you might have

(01:10:09):
inquired, whether I felt disposed to join you.
Oh, I'm sure Fanny why my dear mrs.
Sweet. You heard.
Whole thing canvas this morning between me and mrs.
Short, and you never made the smallest objection.
Besides haven't, I only just made you a present of a
magnificent. Riding-habit cost me, 10 pounds,

(01:10:32):
and one of the most wicked little white awakes in the
world, with a bunch of cocks feathers, all drooping over the
crown come. Now, you know, you are dying to
put them on. You think so do you yes to be
sure. I do you know you're in.
An errant Coquette. Aye, sir a cupcake.
It ha ha ha. Didn't I surprised you trying

(01:10:56):
your hat on 50 Ways before the glass this very morning.
You are caught there. I think it's not true.
You did nothing of the sort. You're always saying something
of this kind. And since these are the
sentiments you entertain of me, I positively refused to stir a
foot with you. So you may go without me

(01:11:19):
Doggedly seating herself, mrs. Short eagerly.
Oh Fanny. No, really my dear.
You can't be in Earnest mrs. Sweet, pettishly.
No, no. I won't go.
Not an inch crosses in sits right?
Very well, mrs. Sweet very well.

(01:11:42):
The old story. You haven't contradicted me
before today. And so you think it is full time
to begin. Ginn was there ever such
Caprice. Cross is still left, mrs.
Short and justly persuading her my dear Fanny.
Now, do be reasonable. You are not going to take
offense Without a Cause I'm here.
Word and joke, mr. Sweet was only in fun were you

(01:12:05):
mr. Sweet after all mr.
Billington's politeness to surely you'll go it would seem
so personal to be sure insult a man like Billington one of the
first houses in the city, most respectable to life Whoa,
creature like Billington, why hekeeps two carriages a couple of
saddle horses and a buggy come now Fanny sale.

(01:12:27):
Go do, that's a ducky. Well, perhaps I've been too
hasty say you didn't mean it will yum.
Oh no. My love upon my honour.
I didn't mean it. Well then as mr.
Bellington We'll be expecting us.
I suppose, I must go now if my husband would but come, oh,

(01:12:51):
never mind him if he is not in time.
We'll go without him. Come, we haven't a minute to
spare. The horses will be here.
Directly exit mrs. Sweet door left.
S interests and mrs. Short door left first engines.
Sweet looking after them. We will go without him.
Exactly, that's the way she carries.

(01:13:14):
Is it? And if I had been the absentee
and it only been a quarter of a minute behind time, she would go
on without me as Leaders. Look at me, she treats me as if
I had been married 20 years, instead of half as many months
but all that applies to short just as well as to me and yet
how he Lords, it over his wife. She actually seems to dote upon

(01:13:37):
Him fondles him. Pat's him, gives way to him.
Where is mrs. Sweet.
Expresses her affection for me. Snapping and snapping and
constant contradiction. It's extraordinary.
I never perceived it before we took these joint lodgings down
here for the sake of being near the Crystal Palace.
Or if we did, sometimes quarrel,I always coax her into good

(01:13:58):
temper again. But since I have witnessed
shorts happiness, I confess my eyes are open to the different
stage of things existing in the two families, and I acknowledge
that it. Irritates me, annoys me for, I
begin to feel myself in a very full us and ridiculous position.
Oh, I must turn over a new Leaf.I really must.

(01:14:20):
I wonder how short does it for his nothing.
Like so good-looking. As I am on the contrary,
although he is my most particular friend, he's a
confounded. The ugly fellow interests even
left. First entrance.
The horses are at the door sir, very well.
Get my whip. Stephen takes one off sofa and
gives it to Sweet and exits leftcenter.

(01:14:43):
It's astonishing what Anna? Like when I worked myself into
Less in the air with his whip, Ihope my wife won't happen to
come in. Just now, I am hardly safe to be
trusted with his whip short outside, our the lunch things
taken away. I am almost famished.
There he is, happy man. Enter short door left-center,

(01:15:04):
short speaking as he comes in here.
Give me a chair. Give me a chair.
I'm tired to death fust and worried out of my life.
Why? How late you are?
We had almost given you up. You're a pretty fellow to
complain here. Have I been chasing about the
city all day on an empty stomach?
I can't neglect my business as you do, and then I'm to be told,

(01:15:26):
you had nearly given me up forsooth here, Steven bring me
up something or other to eat. Why you have hardly left the
scrap upon the table Stevens. Some cold meat sits in the easy
chair left of table. Right?
What are you going to make a heavy lunch in at this hour of
day? I am So that habit of yours
short, I really take anything between breakfast and dinner

(01:15:49):
Norm or do I when I get down first, who devoured the whole
dish of kidneys and left me, nothing for my breakfast, but
half a round of cold toast but what's all that about outside?
They're parading for horses up and down before the house one
great brute nearly ran over me as I was crossing the road
sweets. It's Right of table left.
That's exactly what you said. When you knocked it down that

(01:16:11):
Shetland pony in the borough andtrod upon it and Then came
fainting into a pastry cook shop.
Swearing you had been run over. What didn't I tell you?
Then that we are all going out for a ride.
What do you mean by all? I am not going.
I can tell you. Do you think at my time of life
I would trust myself to the backof a horse from a livery stable?

(01:16:32):
Why when I was 15 or 20 years younger?
In my wildest days I never permitted myself.
Anything beyond a donkey on the Sands at Ramsgate and then only
a quiet one. I never could bear a fiery
donkey. Now you are not going to spoil
sport. Your wife has said her heart
upon it rises. And goes to short, my wife,
sweet, never sets, her heart upon anything, but what Mind Set

(01:16:54):
On to. So, you may send back to of the
horses. I promise you do.
You mean to say, you are going to take this step without first
Consulting? Your wife, of course, I am, what
on your own private Authority. Refuse mrs.
Short refused. There will be no necessity for
that. I shall just say, I don't go and

(01:17:15):
she won't go either sweet imitating.
Oh you'll just say you don't go and she won't go either a aside
Bluebeard. Hello.
Now really short, you are jokingwith me, you'll soon.
See whether I'm in Earnest. What do you mean to pretend that

(01:17:35):
she'll give in without disputingthe point without a quarrel?
Not the slightest. My wife always does as I wish
her. Oh, so does Fine.
So does mine when we both wish alike come?
I bet you 5 pounds. You goes fun.
I tell you what it is. Sweet.
When a woman once Falls violently in.
Love with a man, there's no endsof the influence.

(01:17:57):
He has over her, sweet aside, conceited all hippopotamus
aloud, you'll lose your money, depend upon it.
She will not give way. Well, we shall see about that.
For, here she comes in to mrs. Short.
In Hatton riding habit. Rude or left first entrance.
Well, here you are my dear at last pet in his cheek.

(01:18:21):
You naughty heavy to be so late.Crosses Too Short.
Yes, Lou here. I am very tired.
I can tell you and ravenous for something to eat.
Oh, dear dear. What can I tell them to get you?
Never mind. There was something coming.
I've taken care of myself, but bless my heart.
Lou, how smart you are while youlook as if you were going to

(01:18:41):
ride a cock-horse to Banbury Cross.
Any and mr. Sweet have been proposing right
on Horseback. Yes, I know quite a cavalcade
Suite has been telling me but shouldn't you have waited for my
return before you gave your consent?
Sweet aside, what a terrible crime?
Well Henry, dear, I didn't thinkyou would, you know, Louisa I am

(01:19:04):
not fond of equestrian exercise.I never even go to Ashley's, but
since you have been at the trouble of dressing yourself,
why? I suppose, I mustn't disappoint.
Mrs. Sweet. And Her husband.
Thank you, Harry. That's kind sweet decide there's
five pounds in my pocket. Sure to Ill humouredly.
At the same time, of course, it will be very dull and

(01:19:26):
uncomfortable for me to be left all alone here while you are out
pleasuring just like you wives. You always think of yourselves
first with increasing it'll humor who the deuce was it, put
the idea into your head why I did I believe but to confess the
truth I should never have. Wrapped of the thing if it
hadn't been for mr. Mrs. Short alarmed and checking

(01:19:48):
sweet. No, no.
Never mind. Its of no consequence.
Don't let us talk any more aboutit.
She begins to pull off her gloves.
Why, mr. Short.
What are you doing, Rice's? I see, my husband doesn't wish
me to go and I feel now. It wouldn't be right to leave
him. So although he has given me full
permission to go. I shall not Avail myself of his

(01:20:10):
kindness short, looking at sweetAhem sweet aside.
How on Earth does he do it? What can be the nature of the
influence? He must do something to her.
Well, since I am not going, I may as well.
Take off my things too sweet. You'll explain matters to Fanny

(01:20:31):
this side. What a fright?
He gave me just as everything was arranged so nicely.
Havoc seiches exit through door left first, entrance short
balancing himself with his thumbs in his waistcoat.
Looking triumphantly. It's sweet.
I Told You So hand me over 5 pounds sweet taking out his

(01:20:51):
person paying the money. It isn't enough that I am to be
made sensible. That I'm not have such a happy
man, as you are, but I'm to pay for the conviction into the
bargain. You're a sorcerer.
Well, the girls devoted to me, that's all go along with.
You don't tell me, it won't bearthinking about sounds, I shall
become unhappy. If I do, I won't stand.

(01:21:14):
And it short. Hang me, if I go to do it,
either, hang me. If I do.
And yet that will be no punishment to Fanny for.
She didn't wish to go herself. Pray, don't let me prevent.
You're going it just even left center with cold meat to Stephen
left Center. Come what a time.
You've been he sits down and begins to eat, Stephen.

(01:21:36):
Yes sir. Tell the man to take back the
horses to the stable. We are not going into mrs.
Sweet. As he is speaking.
Dressed in writing hat and habitthrough door left second
entrance. What do you mean not going?
No, my dear. I have changed my mind.
Steven lingers for further orders, what?

(01:21:56):
For, we're already and here's mr.
Short come home, yes. But you see, he is busy .22
Short, who is eating voraciously.
He doesn't wish to go and his wife remained at home to keep
him company. Both water in the name of
goodness. Has all this to do with us.
I tell you short doesn't want togo and I desire, mrs.

(01:22:20):
Sweet that there may be no further discussion on the
subject. You understand, imitating short.
I don't go aside, that's it. I think as near as a toucher
allowed, the Stephen do what? I ordered you Steven is about to
go stop a moment. Stephen how mrs.

(01:22:42):
Sweet. You have ventured a Order.
No, but tell me how strange you are.
Just now when I didn't care about going, you won't violently
in favor of it. And now I have consented and
dressed myself to please you. You want to stay home?
My dear Wickham. What nonsense?

(01:23:03):
Of course we must go. Now, you have sent to say.
So, what can you be thinking about sweet?
Aside, There She is. Again, arguing the A point with
me, how different was short and yet that great hockey fellow
insensible, his own happiness sits there.
Stuffing ready to burst himself short looking up from his knife

(01:23:25):
and fork. Well have you settled the point?
My dear Steven is waiting for orders.
You know, I have already given way to you Willie.
It's now your turn sweet decide.I feel that I am yielding and I
can't help it. Wood.
Well, that's true. So, you did aside shorts

(01:23:49):
laughing at me, but I mustn't. Exact too much from her at once.
Come we shall be, keeping them waiting to be sure.
I didn't think of that, you know, that makes all the
difference short. We have friends waiting for us.
Steven, you can tell the man to take back only two of the
horses. Yes, sir exit left Center there.

(01:24:14):
That's like a manner. Since you may give me a kiss and
then you get your hat and let usfeel certainly Fanny.
That habit of yours is monstrously be coming to you
kisses. Her aside.
That's all very well in its way but I'm a great ass for my pains
notwithstanding now, then are you ready?

(01:24:36):
Sweet putting on his hat and taking his whip, goodbye short,
take care of yourself. We shall find you at home.
I suppose, when we come back, Ohyes!
No fear of that, a safe ride to you.
Goodbye exit. Sweet and mrs.
Sweep left Center. Ha ha ha.
There he goes! Poor tame snake!
A model of a husband. Reenter mrs.

(01:24:58):
Short door left first entrance without her habit as at First
mrs. Short aside looking after mr.
And mrs. Sweet.
There they go. How I should like to be with
them. I wish them Joy.
Haha. Sweet will make more More than
one wry face when he comes to sit down to dinner and seeing
his wife by Lou. I'm afraid you don't stay at

(01:25:20):
home with a good grace. Oh, don't say.
So, I am sure. I am always delighted to be with
you. Besides it is no less a duty
than a pleasure to me, short, eating heartily all the while he
is talking. Now, I asked you if we are not
ten times better off, comfortably at home here with a
good luncheon before us. Then if we were jolting about on

(01:25:41):
the backs of those brutes exposed, all the To the danger.
My, my dear, you are in a brown study, mrs.
Short recollected herself. Yes.
Certainly, what did you say? Who was it?
They're going with mrs. Short to getting an easy.
If you talk so much, you'll spoil your luncheon.

(01:26:02):
Well, I don't know how it is butmy appetites beginning to fail.
This is short bustling about thetable.
To draw off his attention. Have a glass of Sherry here.
Let me pour some out for you. Poor.
Is that wine for him and goes round to the right of short?
Well I have rather a weakness for a glass of Sherry having
drink it. Another she pours out another

(01:26:24):
aside. Sweet could but see me now
allowed, what a nice little parlor.
Maid, you would make Lou why youare prettier than ever shook
sir, under the chin and takes her by the hand, to draw her
towards him, mrs. Short, with disinclination to
meet his Advance. Oh, how cold your hand is
Breaking away from him and running towards the Bell left.

(01:26:48):
Let me bring and tell them to light a fire for you.
No, no never mind. Come here.
I want to talk to you. Pour me out another glass of
wine, mrs. Short, observing him.
My dear, a third glass before dinner.
Why not? It warms me and does me good.
Come give me a bus drawing her towards him.

(01:27:08):
This is short breaking away fromhim.
Oh what on Earth's the matter? Only a sudden Stitch, keeping at
a distance. I tell you, I want to have a
chat with you. Come sit by me mrs.
Short, taking her work and sitting at table left very well.
What shall we chat about? Don't sit.
So far off. He is about to rise to go nearer

(01:27:32):
to her, but sinks back again into the chair.
There's my leg again. What a grinder I haven't got rid
of my Gout yet about to rise. This is short ready to him.
Footstool don't get up, don't get up, you'll hurt yourself
here, take this footstool shirt,rubbing his leg and putting it

(01:27:52):
on foots to and then sits left. Ah that's better.
That's more comfortable aside ifthat silly fellow sweet could
but see me allowed I am a snug. Now as a bug in a rug what would
poor sweet give to exchange places with me this spring
cushion instead of a hard saddleand his leg up at his ease talk

(01:28:14):
thinking of him reminds me, you haven't told me who's their
friends morning, she seems to hesitate, what don't, you know?
Yes, oh, yes, mr. Billington, I believe.
Oh, mr. Bellington is it a friend of the
sweets? Let's see, we dined there today.
Are remarkably nice young man, that mr.

(01:28:34):
Bellington, he is particularly civil to me lately, whenever he
meets me in the city, I am sure.Nothing could be more polite and
attentive than his behaviour to us that night at the sweets in.
Just before we came down here bythe by, how is it?
He never comes to our house. Mrs. Short confused.
Why I I never asked him, you know, you are so much away from

(01:28:57):
home. I am so often alone that I you
are quite right, my dear perfectly correct certainly
appearances, must be attended tovery proper conduct on your part
delicate and correct in the extreme aside eat, cod, sweet,
right. I am the happiest fellow Under
the Sun interests even left Center.

(01:29:19):
OH sir. Oh mum such a shocking thing.
Good gracious, Steven, what's the matter?
Oh the poor gentleman. Poor mr.
Sweet why what has happened to him?
Oh horrible sir, tremendous throwed from his arse dashed his

(01:29:39):
self to Pieces. Oh good Heavens.
Where is he? This comes Steady men of
business, taking deriding when they're turned of five and
forty. Poor fellow.
Poor fellow into sweet left-center, frightened out of
his wits leaning on his wife andStephen apparently, in great
pain, mrs. Short and short, run to meet

(01:30:01):
him. Oh, my dear friend, what is it?
Tell me thrown thrown from my horse mrs.
Sweet with the greatest solicitude and affection my
poor. Husband quick quick the sofa
Stephen Wheels. Sofa to Center.
Lay him on the sofa gently, their place your head upon my

(01:30:25):
arm. Where is it?
You're in pain. Do tell us.
Oh, here here, they're Seated. On sofa Center run Stephen as
fast as You're no, no, I won't see him.

(01:30:45):
He'll cut both my legs off. Mrs. Sweet to Steven get your
hat will send you word if you are to go.
Yes, ma'am aside. Is he goes out?
Looking at sweet, well he has gone and smashed his self, exit
left Center short examining and bending first, his legs.
And then his arms courage. Come.

(01:31:08):
Let me see where you're hurt. Oh, Have you broken a limb
examining know, your legs are all sound.
And so, are your arms. Come sit up, man.
You're more frightened than hurt.
Mercy, be praised. How thankful I am short too
sweet. What are you have?
Given me? Courtney had a glass of wine

(01:31:29):
Lou, mrs. Short, pours out a glass of
wine. And as she is, carrying it to
him. Mrs. Sweet.
Takes it out of her hand and gives it to Sweet, who drinks
it. Mrs. Sweet to mrs.
Short. As she takes the wine Zanko,
that was meant for me. Mrs. Sweet this week.
Not hearing short. How are you now?
My dear well I feel a little better but there's something

(01:31:54):
gone. I'm sure I felt it.
Go unbuttoning, his waistcoat and feeling.
Yes, it's one of your brace buttons, don't you see?
Mrs. Short to mrs. Sweet.
How pale you are Fanny mrs. Sweet recovering, from her
alarm. It is passing off now.
I had had a little pride that's all short, too, sweet.

(01:32:17):
You would go showing off your horsemanship and see what has
come of it. No, not at all.
I assure you. I was going along as quietly as
possible getting gradually more confident and comfortable when
all of a sudden, a cursed, little brute of a curve and out
of a yard close by and flew at the horses throat.
I thought something was going tohappen by the look of the

(01:32:39):
mayor's ears and just as I was about to let go of, A bride on
catch. Hold of the main upward her
heels into the air and I was shot like a bullet from a gun
slap over her head into the roadand poor little pug was kicked
to death, I suppose. No, I had my revenge.
How do you mean why I came down in a sitting posture plump on

(01:33:00):
his back, one squeak, and it wasall over mrs.
Sweet seen that, nothing is the matter with her husband,
William, I think you are nearly.All right, again now.
Yes, but here, thank you. I shall get around again in a
day or two. I dare say, you were far more
frightened than I was mrs. Sweet smiling.

(01:33:22):
Oh, Come William. I am not quite so sure about
that. Now that the dangers over we can
afford, you know, to laugh aboutit, you were not at all.
Alarmed, where you dear? And the droll manner in which

(01:33:43):
you fell. Exactly.
It certainly broke his fall and the dogs back at the same time,
much better than falling. The other way only picture to
yourselves my husband's attitude, after his descent
comfortably sitting, in the middle of the road without his

(01:34:06):
hat, with all the dirt, T. Little vagabonds in the parish
gathered around him. Haha.
Sweet to getting offended. I'm glad you're amused.
I really don't see the joke. Mrs. Short aside, to mrs.
Sweet. Don't Fanny, he don't like it.
Mrs. Sweet. A thrusting.

(01:34:27):
Her handkerchief in her mouth. To love perhaps, but I'm
positively called help it. You know.
It makes one Laugh In Spite of oneself.
Haha, sweet more offended. Really mrs.
Sweet. I consider this behavior of

(01:34:48):
yours. Very extraordinary, not to say
disgusting here. Have I been within a hair's
breadth of losing my life and you are turning the whole thing
into ridicule? Now don't be angry.
I can't help myself. Just imagine our friend here,

(01:35:10):
magnificently. Enthroned in the gutter on the
body of his prostrate enemy. Ha ha ha mr.
Short sir leave off. Well, it is not my fault.
It was your wife sent me off. Haha.
Sweet. Looking angrily at his wife.
Yes. I know it was and her
preposterous Merriment exposes her great want of feeling, the

(01:35:31):
Stony nature of her heart. Mrs. Sweet.
Trying in vain to repress her laughter, yay.
Now yes ma'am. I repeated, the Stony nature of
your heart. Now Willie, it's you natured of
you to say that. If I could for laughing, I

(01:35:52):
should be very angry with you. Myself, dammit Madam.
Will you leave off? I can't William TV.
Now, it's all over that. I can't really contain myself.

(01:36:17):
Ha ha ha. I should do myself any giri.
Ha ha ha. Oh, go out of the room since
it's a fizzy. You exit birthday with
irresistible laughter. Sweet.
Pacing the stage in a passion. Such scandalous want to feelings

(01:36:40):
is a bummer Herbal revolting. Mrs. Short tried to pacify him,
mr. Sweet pray.
Sweet interrupting her. And Crossing two left.
No mrs. Short, I appeal to you.
I appeal to you, Ma'am. Suppose.
This Misfortune. It happened too short.
Do you think for one moment thatyou have been capable of such
Behavior crosses to right? Ah sweet but there's no arguing

(01:37:04):
by comparisons. All women are not of the same
sensitive disposition as my Louisa.
I flatter myself that All feel things alike, but Fanny is the
most affectionate creature in the world, and I'm sure mr.
Sweet is very sincerely attachedto you.
It was evidently quite honest, erekle affection, wholly, Beyond
her power to control one of those irresistible fits of

(01:37:25):
laughter that we are all of us subject to at times.
Oh, I shared pass it off so easily.
I assure you. How does she know what may be
the end of it there? Maybe after symptoms?
Oh don't let us think of that. I trust that you are not
seriously hurt. Come.
Now, I'll go and fetch her. You must kiss and be friends.
You must indeed into Maria door left.

(01:37:48):
My mistress. Wishes to see you.
Mom. Very well, Maria.
I'll come directly exit. Maria.
De Suite there. You see she has sent for me to
make it up with you, mrs. Short.
Listen to me. No, no, I'll not hear another
word. You must be reconciled to your
wife. This very minute on pain of my
severe. Displeasure Suite is about to

(01:38:10):
object--. No, no I can't hear you.
Not half a syllable, I shall runand fetch her exit door, left,
second entrance. What a treasure you have in that
woman short, she's a perfect pattern, a model, an
incomparable model of conjugal devotedness.
It's a good thing for you. I didn't see her first sits on

(01:38:30):
sofas. Enter my dear friend, women are
neither more nor less than what we make them.
At least in marriage. Louisa was not always the docile
obedient wife. You now, see her.
And of course, till all the tomfoolery of the honeymoon was
over and I began to take the proper tone.
Sweet rice has. Nah, why didn't I take the
proper tone? Exactly Rice's, but it requires

(01:38:55):
a peculiar tacked. The method of proceeding I
believe is a secret not possessed by all take pity on me
short, tell it to me, show me how you do it and you'll bind me
to you for life, you want firmness, you give way.
And when once a merry man you know allows Two voices in his
house. It soon ends in there being only
one and you'll excuse me. Sweet, the result is he has led

(01:39:17):
by the nose by his own wife, as hiago says, in the play, as
tenderly as asses are. Yes, I am afraid, I have been a
very great ass but shall I suffer the state of things to go
on till I become the laughingstock of all my friends?
No, no never. I can't sleep at nights for
thinking of the difference between your wife and mine.

(01:39:40):
Sounds arm resolved. I won't put up with it.
Any longer. I'll be as much master in my own
house as you are, every jot is much, who the devil are you that
you should carry it over me in this sort of way.
Do you hear what I say? Short, I insist upon being as
much minded as you are sir, I insist upon it.

(01:40:00):
What can I do to show my authority?
I have it. I won't go to the Opera tonight.
I won't die knit, billington's. What do I care for?
His mock turtle? Damn is milk punch.
I know she has her heart upon it, but I won't go.
They'll be a precious kick up. She'll fly into a passion fala.
Crying perhaps have a fit and shall I give way?

(01:40:22):
No, I'll stand like a rock. Well, said Bravo, would you be
sure to give in again? Yeah.
Then you shall see if only. You keep your word you'll be
sure to succeed. No, I have been too much of a
nincompoop all this while too good-natured too.
Indulgent To still hear you. Here.

(01:40:42):
They come now. Mind sweet left.
Don't you trouble yourself? I'm just in a humour for her
into mrs. Sweet and mrs.
Short door left Maria following with an evening dress on her
arm. Steven enters left Center and
wheels back sofa to write in flat.
Never mind Fanny. Why, what a child you are.

(01:41:04):
Don't let the dress, but you outof temper.
I'm sure I can alter it for you to Maria.
Late carefully on the bed, except Maria door left first.
Entrance to mrs. Sweet.
You must come and dress in my room.
Was there ever anything? So, vexatious stupid creature.
So, it's left, Steven removes luncheon and exit left Center

(01:41:28):
Suite, aside to mrs. Short.
Well, mrs. Short.
Not at first understanding him. Oh, yes, aside, well, I spoke to
her about it, and Sure. She's very sorry for what took
place. So you mustn't think any more of
it. Sure decide to Sweet.
Be firm show. Determination mrs.

(01:41:49):
Short aside, too, sweet. You promised me, you know, to
make it up with her short side to assist short.
This is no place for us. Just now hadn't.
You better go and dress. Wait a minute.
I want just to speak my dear very well sweet.
Observing them astonishing one word and he is obeyed at once.

(01:42:09):
And so our decide to Sweet recollect.
Sweet aside Too Short, never fear short to his wife.
Now if you please exit, short, and mrs.
Short door left, first entrance,mrs.
George has, right? She seems vexed.
Perhaps she is really sorry. These things only happened to

(01:42:30):
me. Whose fault is that ma'am?
How was I, to know? I should be so misunderstood.
You should be. Particular in what you say.
Then think before you speak. Well, so, I thought I did, I am
quite grieved about it, rings Bell into Maria door left.

(01:42:52):
First, entrance has mr. Billington's, alt sent the book
of the fashion. She promised the other day to
mrs. Short now, man, send Stephen for
it directly then and as soon as it comes, bring it to me.
Don't make any mistake. Now bring It to me you
understand very well ma'am, exitleft Center Suite aside, he's

(01:43:16):
off at a tangent now above her. Finery allowed, your grief
appears to be of short. Duration, ma'am.
I am sure I was quite in despairabout it, but Louisa has kindly
undertaken to put matters to write for me.
Mrs. Short, then has undertaken more than she has any Authority
for and may find the task more difficult than she.

(01:43:40):
Oh, I hope not but if she doesn't succeed, I shall go
another way to work a sharp knife.
Will soon settle the business, asharp knife.
You alarm me what for what for? Why to rip up the seam of my
dress? To be sure.
I won't the upper skirt open at the side trimmed with flowers.

(01:44:03):
There's nothing more becoming trimmed with flowers fool to
suppose it. I As in any way concerned in
your vexation, you of course not.
How should that concern? You, you have the face to ask me
the question after your scandalous Behavior, just now.
Oh, that's what you've been driving at all.

(01:44:23):
This file. I didn't understand you.
You don't mean to say that you are still in a bad temper about
my joking. You there.
I ask your pardon, shall I go down on my knees?
No. No by no means Laughs Again,
ma'am, if you like pray, don't restrain yourself but you will

(01:44:46):
find for the future that I shan't give way to all your
whims and fancies quite as easily as I have done.
It doesn't answer crosses to left come.
Now Willie I didn't mean to offend you the danger was all
past you know? No ma'am.
I am not in a laughing humor today and as I see nothing

(01:45:08):
amusing and what has happened tome Me and don't feel disposed to
go out. You will be pleased to stay at
home tonight. Ma'am.
Very well. Yes, but I mean it, this is
sweet. I am not.
Well, I am suffering from the effects of my accident wounded,
both in mind, and body crosses to write.
Well, why didn't you see the doctor?

(01:45:28):
Then when I wished you sound ma'am, a man may be wounded
without having all his bones broken.
Besides I am not obliged to givea reason.
I Choose to go, and I request you not to go either.
I order you not to go, oh, very well sir, as you please, of
course, but since you feel yourself.

(01:45:50):
So very, very ill. Why on Earth?
Don't you go to bed because I prefer to sit up sits right
then, you must allow me to say that you are not going.
Tonight is a mere Caprice. You would be just as well at the
Opera as sitting up in this room.
Possibly. But I don't mean to put it to

(01:46:10):
the proof. What Not For my sake, really?
Not. If I cooked you, I do so wish to
go. It's so seldom.
I have an opportunity of going to the Opera.
No its of no use. I tell you I won't go.
Really this behavior is most important able.
Why you are completely altered, man, I am surprised you.

(01:46:35):
Yes, ma'am, I am altered totallyaltered.
Crosses to left. I have given way for the last
time and you'll be much more surprised when you find that I
am firm determined fixed. Well, I have never seen you in
such a detestable temper before in all my life.
You provoked me ma'am. I am tired of being contradicted

(01:46:57):
tired of it. What can you mean William?
Why if anyone saw us, we should be set down for the most unhappy
couple in the world. So, we are missing.
We'd so we are although I wasn'taware of it to.
We came down here a month ago tothese lodgings with the shorts.
I was contented enough before then happiest, the days were

(01:47:19):
long sometimes, giving in to your way, sometimes getting my
own, but I was a fool then and didn't know any better.
Look at Short, my eyes are opened.
Now, see how much happier he is with his wife than I am with
you? I wish ma'am to be obeyed, like
short to be observed, like shortto be doted on like A short to

(01:47:39):
be caressed like short to be petted, like short to be petted
like short to be fast. Like short.
Why ain't I was much consequenceas he is.
Why is he always obeyed when I am not crosses to write?
Because he is less extravagant in his desires as a tile, ma'am,
or else perhaps, because he has a more amiable way of making his

(01:48:05):
wishes understood in a word because he Doesn't resemble you.
This is downright personality. I give you fair warning, I am
getting into a most enormous passion interests even left
Center, mr. Bellington is here, ma'am, we're
not at home, cross is still left, what does he want?

(01:48:26):
He says, sir, he waited this morning for nearly an hour in
front of the Crystal Palace. According to appointment and
finding that you didn't come, hehas called to inquire if There
is anything the matter. We can't see him.
We're not at home impossible. You can't mean it.
What? Now he is in the house.

(01:48:48):
Sweet de Steven, do you hear what I say?
Exit Stephen left Center. I never would have believed that
you could have behaved like this.
What will mr. Billington think of us.
What do I care? You must go tonight.
Now, if it'd only be to apologize to him, After keeping

(01:49:09):
him waiting to all the morning. It will be time enough tomorrow.
I shall see him in the city. I don't understand your conduct
William. It must be simply to Vex an
annoyed me that you refused to accompany me this evening.
No ma'am. I'm acting advisedly on

(01:49:29):
principle very well sir. I see your object you have
determined to make me unhappy and you have perfect.
Ali succeeded, I am not accustomed to these.
Insane transport of passion without the slightest motive,
you are cruel treatment as wounded me to that degree.

(01:49:51):
What if I don't do deserve it, sweet, softened why I can't help
feeling so happy as we have always lived together till we
came down here. Repent of this behavior before
long depend upon it. I see how it is.

(01:50:14):
You want to make me your slave. The be an echo of your own
lordly will very well sir. I submit henceforward, you shall
find me the most submissive wives, every wish shall be
acquiesced in every command obeyed.

(01:50:34):
But I I shall never never love you anymore.
Crossing left sweet follows her in treating and Crossing down
Center but mrs. Sweet Fanny, my dear, don't cry.

(01:50:56):
You shall go to the Opera, I'll go with you, we'll all go to the
Opera. oh, You have made me. I'll go go.
Just myself. William, perhaps you left

(01:51:18):
yourself. So sorry, exit.
Sobbing through door left. First entrance.
Sweet wiping his eyes. Sighs.
I have behaved like a barbarian to her into short door left.

(01:51:40):
First entrance. Well did it succeed?
No, it didn't. You astonish me.
I'm ten times more unhappy than I was before.
I made her cry and I can't bear it.
Well, it is rather painful at first, but it will come Easier
by. And by I'll tell you, then I
feel, I have been making a broodof myself all through your

(01:52:01):
confounded advice. How sweet?
What's that you say? Certainly haven't you been
boasting about your happiness and your influence over your
wife ever? Since you have been down here?
What the devil was that to me? What was it to me?
Whether she contradicted you or not, my wife was in the habit of
contradicting. Me and I was accustomed to it.

(01:52:22):
Come come I shan't I say you have destroyed all my domestic
peace Crossing to left. You misunderstand me.
Sweet. Is that the way to talk to a
friend, you are no friend of mine.
Fine, you're an interfering meddling old fellow that has
always been your rate fault. Interfering in what doesn't
concern? You sits left.

(01:52:44):
Come, I say that's a little too strong.
Weren't you everlastingly? Boring me with your complaints.
How I did this? And I did two other.
Why? I was always able to get my own
way when you couldn't get yours.Well, then, since you're so
ungrateful, since you put me to it, I'll tell you why, simply
because your wife doesn't care astraw for you.
So we do Rises, Short. No, not a button depend on it,

(01:53:08):
it's false, she does, give me your reason for saying.
So what better proof of it? Can you have than the fact of
you not being happy with her? You see how happy I am with
mine? Not happy with her.
Do you mean seriously to insinuate that?
I am not happy with her. Take care.
What you are doing, short, don'ttry to disenchant my life with

(01:53:29):
horrible suspicions, but even ifit were, so I shall never win
her back to me by violence. And quarreling sits lift.
Of course not I never think of quarreling with my wife and as
the violence I hate it on the contrary I sometimes show her
little delicate attentions whichwomen know, well, how to
appreciate, for instance, she isgoing to the Opera tonight.

(01:53:51):
Well, what do I do? Why I send up to Covent Garden
Market and buy her a bouquet Billington was going to buy some
for himself. And I entrust him with the
commission, sweet Rises and run Center, where you going to buy
something from my wife. Buy something, what?
I don't know. Anything half a dozen things.
Everything I can find. Stay Stay.

(01:54:13):
Don't hinder me. Let's see.
Have I any money? Yes.
All right. I'll tell them to send in their
whole stock for selection. The first shop, I come to short,
detaining him, sweet. Don't be a fool.
The first shop you come to his apork, butchers into Maria left
center with the book of the Fashions.
Well, what do you want? I beg your pardon sir.

(01:54:37):
I thought, my mistress was here.She is in mrs.
George room, what's that? The fashion book, sir.
Oh, Capital thought, give it to me.
The mistress told me, most particularly said not to give it
to anyone but her never mind. I'll take it to her myself.
Maria gives the book there that will do, I'll see to it.

(01:54:59):
Thank you, sir, exit door left, second entrance.
I am glad I've got a hold of this.
First, perhaps I shall be able to find something.
She might take a fancy to I knowher taste opens the book.
Sure to side you'll never get onwith his wife.
He has no tact not the slightest.
Observing. Sweet good gracious.

(01:55:21):
Sweet what's the matter? Don't you feel?
Well what's this? What is it?
Why you see what it is? The book of the Fashions, sweet
left. What can it mean, short, right?
Looking into the book. I know.
Note written in pencil without adress for Signature.
We're a my spectacles. Why am I afraid to read it?

(01:55:43):
Why do I trembled from head to foot?
I'm in a cold perspiration shortwritten in pencil.
I have seen that hand somewhere.Whose do you think it is?
It strikes me? All at once, it's billington's,
stop an instant. Let me go and find my glasses
sweets. Easy to hold of his arm.

(01:56:03):
Did you mark? What the girl said?
That you were to be sure and give the book to nobody about my
wife. Yes I heard her say that.
Let me read reads I waited for you all the morning so he did go
on sweet reads. I'm afraid to ask why you didn't
come. It is now, five days since I

(01:56:24):
have seen you, this is cruel, but I implore of you to give me
an interview tomorrow in the lane at the back of the house at
2:00, if it be, but for 10 minutes, we shall meet this
evening. No, but I shall have no
opportunity of being alone with you, you will not refuse.
If you return, the feelings thatare consuming me, they look at

(01:56:44):
each other. Then after a short, pause sweet.
Falls into shorts arms, take care.
You'll have me down Barrett. Like a man, they're take this
chair try and recover yourself. He supports him to a chair
right? Sweetie sinking into the chair.
Oh short. Never mind my dear fellow, I'll

(01:57:04):
Stand By You. I'm your friend.
Oh for some then to my feelings,something to chair, he snatches
shorts handkerchief from his pocket and tears it what the
devil you doing? That's one of my best half dozen
fresh cambric Gathering up the pieces and putting them into his
pocket. Sure.
Are you a good pistol shot? I'm good pistol shot.

(01:57:27):
No, I never fired a pistol in mylife.
You'll Revenge me. If I fall, I expected of you as
my friend. You said you'd Stand By Me You
Don't mean to say you're going to challenge him.
What? Not after he has seduced, my
wife's affections short aside, what a lucky thing, Louisa never
asked him to call fight him. Yes, crossed a handkerchief.

(01:57:48):
A my shirt sleeves with a pistolin one hand and a sword in the
other. You surely don't mean that you
would be likely to take any active steps to prevent that
meeting. Certainly not.
If you don't wish it what you wouldn't, for instance, you
think be likely to go before a magistrate, or anything of that
sort shortly in Hand upon his heart, you may rely upon my
friendship for not interfering, sweet decide, he can't be in

(01:58:12):
Earnest allowed. Why?
You are as bloodthirsty as I am?The traitorous.
That was why she was so anxious to see him.
When he called, that was why shewanted to go to the Opera
tonight. But let me seek for some further
proof against her something to utterly confound, her, he begins
to read the letter to himself short.

(01:58:32):
Also trying to read the letter over sweets shoulder.
I can't see a word without my glasses.
What can I have done with them? Wait, a moment, they must be
somewhere in the room. He goes to the back of the stage
to look for his classes and discovers to the audience that
they are hanging at his back. Sweet reading to himself in a
low tone. While short is searching for his
spectacles at the back. Ah, if you grant my request,

(01:58:58):
carry the bouquet of violets tonight, which I have taken
measures for your receiving froma safe hand which can awaken No
suspicion, the Viper short, giving up the search in coming
forward. What have you found anything?
Fresh? Sweet showing him the letter
look. Read judge for yourself.

(01:59:18):
Sure, trying in vain to read theletter.
No, it's no. Use confound it.
I can't make out a word signal. A signal short, think of that.
They are actually carrying on a secret correspondence.
By means of signals. What signals, why the devil
don't you read the Better. She shall go tonight.
She shall go. But I'll watch her like a lynx.

(01:59:41):
Now be prudent. Let me entreat of you to do
nothing. Rashly.
Sweet vehemently, putting back the letter into the book.
I'll give it her with my own hand and see how she takes it,
short, restraining him. No, no, no, let me beg of you
and your present state of excitement, it would be Madness.
Let me give it to her. I shall be able to see more than

(02:00:02):
you will. I am cooler more collected.
Do you think so well perhaps youare right, gives short the book.
Leave me to deal with her alone.Sweet.
You are not fit to be trusted. Just to present go and dress, go
to your own room and Endeavour to calm yourself calm myself.
I have a good mind to jump out of a window, don't believe, me

(02:00:24):
long or I shall do myself a Mischief.
I'm in a state of desperation Caesar knife from the table
short takes it from him exit through door, right?
Poor fellow. He's In a pitiable condition,
but he has brought it all upon himself by over indulging, his
wife to that absurd extent, thathe has completely ruined his own
domestic happiness. It might have been just the same

(02:00:46):
with me. If I had been fool enough to
walk in his footsteps, I wish I could make out the contents of
this letter though. Stay in term is so sweet and
misses short as he is about to open the book in evening dress
both carrying bouquets mrs. Sweet, looking down at the
dress. She wears the dress looks as
well again. So, I'm delighted with the

(02:01:07):
alteration short aside, what tranquility and guilt?
She's a cool hand mrs. Sweet scene short, but not ready
yet, mr. Short.
Won't we be late. Where is my husband short with
an absurd of sumption of dignity.
He is dressing Madam. Mrs. Sweet surprised at his

(02:01:29):
manner. Well, that is a very singular
manner of telling me so I am nota We're Madam that there is
anything more singular in my manner, than in another's with
ridiculous significance. After a pause, allow me to give
you this book. Mrs. Sweet.
Taking it quickly. Oh, here it is at last.

(02:01:50):
Thank you. Short, aside, how she betrays
herself? I am afraid mr.
Short, something has put you out, possibly something has
Madame exit door, right, mrs. Sweet looking at To him.
What is the matter with your husband Louisa?
He appears to be in the high ropes about something.

(02:02:14):
Mrs. Short, anxiously, I haven'tthe smallest idea.
He seemed a very strange. He's an oddity.
I could scarcely keep my countenance, although I am by no
means in a merry Yuma. The gentlemen are Bewitched.
I think my good man is not in a very amiable frame of mine
either. Oh, well.

(02:02:35):
We must leave them alone and they'll come around at their
Leisure. I suppose.
What can be the reason I wonder where?
Now you're going to torment yourself about that?
Why don't you treat these thingsis, I do you always in a state
of Adoration of your husband whois face to.
It is really a very absurd of you and is quite spoiling him.

(02:03:00):
Besides it is not only bad policy, as far as you are
concerned, But it does me a positive injury.
Also here have I had a regular scene with William and have it.
Been indulge with some charming comparisons in your favor.
She carelessly opens the book and looks at the pictures.

(02:03:22):
Oh come you have succeeded? Most admirably with my dress.
See. Look here comparing the dress
she has on with the one in the book.
It is exactly. We, as you have done it, mr.
Short in an absolute manner scarcely looking at it.
Yes, I see. Mrs. Sweet.

(02:03:43):
Picking up, the note, which is followed out of the book?
Why? He has a note Louisa you are
dreaming. See, here's a note, a note?
Yes. Bouldin out of the book.
Is it for us? Do you think I seem to know the
hand to be sure. It is mr.
Billington's mrs. Short glancing, at the ready.

(02:04:05):
No, no, no. Put it back again.
Put it back again into the book.What for water?
Hurry. You're in mrs.
Short, trying to get hold of thenote.
Which mrs. Sweet holds from her?
No, my dear Fanny. We have no right to read it.
Consider, it may have been sent in mistake there.
Appears to be neither addressed nor signature.

(02:04:26):
Oh, it's some message about returning.
The book reads I waited for you all the morning, I am afraid to
ask why you didn't come. It is now Fair.
Five days since I saw you. This is cruel, but I implore of
you to give me an interview tomorrow in the lane, at the

(02:04:50):
back of the house at 2:00. If it be only 14 minutes, we
shall meet this evening but I shall have no opportunity of
being alone with you, you will not refuse.
If you return, the feelings thatare Consuming me, mrs.

(02:05:13):
Short interrupting her in great confusion Fanny.
How can you pray? Put it back again, mrs.
Sweet. Continuing to read if you grant
my request, carry the bouquet ofviolets tonight.
She stops and looks at mrs. Schwartz bouquet then goes on

(02:05:34):
which I have taken measures for you're receiving.
From a safe hand which can awaken no suspicion and
extraordinary epistle to mrs. Short who is in great confusion
and hangs down her head. That bouquet those conscious

(02:05:55):
blushes very pretty upon my honor.
Louise of what am I to think of all this mrs.
Short, with energy, looking up, think of it.
Why? I think that I have been
persecuted with the attentions of a coxcomb Whom I have never
encouraged by word or look persecuted.
Palmata. How could I for an instant?

(02:06:17):
Imagine that he would presume totake such a liberty come.
Now, you had better, make a clean breast of it.
This has been one of your quiet,flirtations.
Flirtations. If the man would persist in his
attentions, how could I help it?You know, I could not be
absolutely rude to him. Mrs. Sweet, been touring her and

(02:06:38):
holding up the letter. Or is this one of his attentions
know, the most extravagant height of consummate impudence?
And if I were not frightened outof my senses, I should go into
fits of laughter, come come mrs.Ado Beulah, I'll have no more of
this. I shall take the liberty of
destroying this, delectable Newttearing it to pieces and putting

(02:07:02):
them in her pocket. Don't scold me for if I have
been silly and a little Indiscreet which mind, I confess
I have been sufficiently punished for it for I haven't
had a minute's. Peace of Mind ever since we have
been down here and after all is there, no, excuse for me, see
how I am treated. He starts at the sight of a rat
runs away from the bark of a dogand couldn't be induced to mount

(02:07:25):
a horse. If his life depended on it, but
he is not afraid to coerce and bully a poor defenseless wife
wiping away a tear. I am sure if my husband would
only be a twentieth part as kindto me as dear mr.
Swede has to you. I wouldn't give him a moment's
vexation for the world known since Lou.
It isn't worth a tear and, you know, I have always told you it

(02:07:49):
is all your own fault, you don'tgo the right way to work with
him. I tell you what it is my dear.
You are two amiable by half bothat home and abroad, but don't
alarm yourself, there is no great.
I'm done. If we can only keep the

(02:08:11):
knowledge of all this ridiculousnonsense from our husbands Matt
judging from mr. Schwartz a delightful are just
now. I am not quite sure that that
will be altogether, so easy, butmind ma'am, no more
persecutions. No more flirting only help me

(02:08:35):
out of the scrape like a good dear creature.
And If Ever I Opposed myself to anything of the kind again, may,
I mrs. We decide making a sign to
signify that their husbands are coming.
Don't be seen with that bouquet in your hand.
Let us exchange take mine, they exchanged bouquets, how shall we
find an excuse for? Not going.

(02:08:57):
Never mind that. Now, don't be frightened, keep
close to me. And if I give you a hint, be
sure to take it enter sweet in short, through door, right in
evening dress. To side too sweet.
Be careful. Now what you say sweet seeing
the volcano in his wife's hands there it is under my very nose

(02:09:19):
shorter side what? Sweet aside the okay short look
into his eyeglass I can't make it out very well this distance
but there was nothing extraordinary in her having a
bouquet so as my wife mrs. Sweet affecting an air of
gaiety. Well you see we are dressed
first Oh, sweet struggling to keep down his feelings.

(02:09:42):
So I perceive so we perceive ma'am, mrs.
Sweet aside to mrs. Short.
My husband is in the secret thatit's quite clear allowed to
sweeten short. You are such bows.
You see that you have kept us waiting.
We must have been a very long time, dressing short or ask the

(02:10:03):
ladies must be very impatient toset out.
True sweet. Your remark is obviously
correct. Sweet look.
His wife minutes seem like hourswhen the mind is on the stretch
of expectation. Sure to cite de Suite.
Pulling him by the skirts of hiscoat.
That's all wrong. Take care.
We shall be in plenty of time. Ladies.

(02:10:24):
Sure to side. That's better.
Keep to the plural number. It sounds less particular.
We shall not be the last to arrive.
I daresay rings. The bell.
Interests, even left Center is the coach at the door, Steven?
Yes, sir. Sir.
I was just coming to tell you asyou rung.
Sweet decide I am suffocating mrs.

(02:10:46):
Sweet. Too sweet.
My dear. Do you still feel disinclined to
go? No, not at all to Steven.
Give me my hat. Stephen takes up his hat from
the sofa which he keeps in his hand.
Not at all aside. If Steven now would but let my
hat fall to give me an excuse for going into a passion.

(02:11:09):
Allowed to Steven. What are you doing with my hat,
sir? Me sir.
Nothing sir. Ah sir, do you dare to answer
me? You scoundrel.
Leave the room, sir, or I'll kick you downstairs.
Stephen aside, putting down the Hat Masters.
Mad I wasn't doing anything withthe yet exit, the center-left.

(02:11:33):
Well, why don't we go? We none of us seem very well
inclined to do that. At why not?
I never felt more disposed to goout in my life.
I am in ecstasies at the thoughtof it so is short very much.
So indeed sweet sweet looking athis wife short and I it is true

(02:11:55):
are no great hands at flirting with the ladies but we can look
on and see others doing so shortaside.
Pulling him by the sleeve. Sweet.
Sweet. Sweet, disregarding short and
looking hard at his wife. Yes.
Am I say we can look on and see others doing so short aside.
He'll spoil all it's impossible to restrain him.

(02:12:18):
Mrs. Sweet aside to her husband and covertly pointing to short.
Don't forget. Goodness sake, make matters.
Worse, make matters worse. Short, ma'am is in my
confidence. Mrs. Sweet, aside perplexed.
I am lost. I can't make it out mrs.
Short aside, what does he mean? Sweet to his wife.

(02:12:41):
It was on my account doubtless that you are so particular about
your dress to please me. Well, yes.
Don't you like it? And this poke that to was to,
please me, I suppose short asideto mrs.
Short after Crossing behind to left of her.
What did you give her? My bouquet for this bouquet that

(02:13:02):
you have been feasting your eyeson ever.
Since I have been in the room that you haven't had a minute
out of your hand, give it to me.Snatch it out of her hand.
See how I prize it to. He raises his arm and is about
to dash it violently to the ground short Crossing too sweet
and seizing. Hold of his arm stop-stop.
I say what are you about? Don't destroy my wife's bouquet

(02:13:26):
sweet after a pause of Amazement.
What's that your your wife spoke?
A do you mean to say that this this bouquet belongs to mrs.
Short to be sure. I do.
Didn't I bring it all the way? From the city on purpose to make
her a present of it. Sweet aside o Embraces, his wife

(02:13:46):
laugh. At me again, Fanny.
Scold me. Snub me.
Turn me into ridicule. I'll never contradict you again
as long as I live mrs. Sweet aside.
Jogging, her husband and covertly pointed to short Hush
Hush to herself a light breaks in upon me to mrs.
Short, you are safe. There's Mistake shorter side.

(02:14:11):
Looking towards sweet. What's the matter with the man?
Has he taken leave of his senses?
Sweet. Significantly to mrs.
Short. Let me restore the spoke, a to
the rightful owner. This is shorter side to mrs.
Sweet. Taking the bouquet and
confusion. What am I to say?
Mrs. Sweet decide to mrs. Short?

(02:14:31):
Nothing now mind allowed. Louisa?
Yeah, what is it? She'll faint.
Yeah, mr. Short come and help her here
smell the assault. They're, they're finding her
mrs. Short sinks fainting into a
chair left, mrs. Short while mrs.
Sweet is Fanning her. Oh, dear.

(02:14:54):
Oh, something has come over me. So suddenly, I am afraid.
I shan't be able to go tonight nonsense.
My dear it will soon. Pass off go.
Indeed impossible. She is more fit for better than
the Opera aside to myths. Short now?
No yielding. No, I feel it would be quite out

(02:15:14):
of the question. Sure, to authoritatively.
What is the meaning of all this?You were well enough.
Just now beside in the threatening tone, are you going
to take a leaf out of mrs. Sweets book, this is short
allowed in a totally changed manner.
My dear, as Louisa seemed so unwell, Willie And as mr.

(02:15:35):
Short, of course can't possibly leave.
His wife suppose we sin of excuse.
I know you don't care about going just as you please.
My dear, whatever you like, I amagreeable to anything come.
Now, I tell you what. I propose, looks significantly.

(02:15:57):
It misses short as the place doesn't seem to agree with mrs.
Short. And as, I think we have had
enough of the Crystal Palace, I'll Stand treat for a month at
the seaside. Change of air will do us.
All good. What do you say short
significantly too sweet. Yes.
The sooner we leave the better aside for you significantly to

(02:16:21):
mrs. Sweet.
What do you say? This is sweet mrs.
Sweet pretends to be confused, turns away, her head and smiles.
Aside I'm using sweet significantly to mrs.
Short, what do you say mrs. Short, mrs.
Short Forces a laugh turns away her head and frowns, aside

(02:16:43):
provoking short, aside looking contemptuously at Sweet.
The idea of his putting up with your front in this sort of way.
Poor sweet. Sweet aside to the audience
Capital joke, isn't it, poor short to him all the good in the
world when he finds it out, won't it?
Mrs. Sweet. Advancing in addressing the

(02:17:05):
audience with her finger to her lips but keep the Edit.
Don't laugh till the curtains down and if it should happen,
you won't be offended. That there is anything at all
like this. Going on at home depend upon it.
You might have done worse than coming to see short and sweet

(02:17:28):
curtain into short and sweet by Adolphus, Charles troughton.
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