Embracing Boundaries: A Story of Health, Hope, and Honoring Self-Care

As the New Year unfurls its wings, I, Shaniqua, reflect upon a moment that shook my world – my granddaughter's health crisis. It's a story woven with fear and hope, a narrative that underlines the episode of 'Free Concepts Unmask' where we celebrate not just new beginnings, but also the unspoken heroes in white coats who work miracles every day. Join me in a conversation that goes beyond mere resolutions, delving into the essence of self-care through the power of setting boundaries. It's about transitioning from a perennial people-pleaser to a self-compassionate individual who understands that sometimes, saying 'no' is the healthiest choice you can make for yourself.

In the spirit of gratitude, I extend heartfelt New Year wishes to each listener, sharing the collective breath we held and released as my granddaughter embarked on her road to recovery. This episode is an offering of thanks for the support that poured in, a testament to the incredible community we've built together. I invite you to share in the appreciation for every second of health and happiness, and to carry that warmth and encouragement through 2024. Let's navigate the uncharted territories of this year, arm-in-arm, with the unshakeable belief that together, we can face whatever lies ahead.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Free Concepts Unmask, where we
motivate, educate and elevate.
I am your host, shaniqua.
Happy, happy New Year toeveryone.
2024.
Woo, thank you for a new year.
Every time I have a new year, Ifeel like I can start all over

(00:21):
again.
Whatever stuff I went throughthe last year, I try to make it
better the next year.
I feel like it's a newbeginning for me.
I don't know if anyone elsefeels like that, but I feel like
it's a new beginning, a newstart, so I'm so grateful for
that.
Listen, guys, I had a scary,scary, scary thing happen

(00:43):
December the 28th.
My granddaughter had seizuresand had to be rushed to the
hospital and she was released onDecember 31st, which was such a
blessing.
But when I tell you, I was inthat hospital just praying,

(01:03):
praying, praying for healing andfor God to definitely work his
magic, whatever it was he neededto do work his miracles, okay.
But listen, she's doing muchbetter.
She had a virus and wasdehydrated and fever.

(01:24):
They think that's what it mayhave been.
The neurologist washed her 24hours and didn't see anything.
So that's definitely a blessing.
I want to thank you to all myprayer warriors.
I went on Facebook and I saidlisten, y'all, I need my prayer

(01:45):
warriors and what I love aboutmy prayer warriors I don't even
have to really go into what'sgoing on.
I just sometimes I just say,hey, I need my prayer warriors,
my granddaughter's, in thehospital, and then everybody
just starts praying and theylift up in prayer.
So I'm so grateful.
I'm so grateful also First andforemost of course y'all know

(02:05):
this to God.
But I want to thank Children'sHospital, scottish Rite, sandy
Springs, georgia, and that's howyou.
They did a phenomenal job andthey are so passionate and
caring about these children.
They were so awesome and Ireally I take my hat off to them

(02:26):
because they really showed.
You know, she was cranky andjust wasn't feeling well and you
know she would kind of hit atthem and she's one guys, so she
hit at them and things like that, but they knew how to handle it
and they understood.

(02:46):
So thank you to Children'sHospital.
I thank you to all the peopleout there that were praying.
I'm so grateful for my son andhis wife.
They did an awesome job.
She acted right away andcalling 911.
And I'm just so grateful and Iknow that was a scary experience

(03:08):
for them as parents, but we gotthrough it y'all.
So that's all that matters.
A lot of people, you know theyalways ask me about God, and you
know my relationship with God,and these are.
This is one of the things thathas happened in my life that I
know that there's a God.
When you start praying, thingschange, Okay.

(03:31):
So, speaking of prayer, we'regoing to go ahead and go into
prayer before we jump into ourtopic.
Father God, in the name ofJesus, god, I thank you so much,
god, for everything, everythingthat you're doing in my life,
everything that you're about todo.
Thank you for the healing of mygranddaughter.
God, I ask that you continue tojust bless us, keep us,

(03:52):
strengthen us, protect us.
God, have my listeners to havean open mind, open heart, to be
able to receive whatever wordthat you have for them.
God, I thank you for thisplatform to be able to share my
experiences, to encourage peoplethrough their journey.
So, god, I thank you.
In Jesus' name, we pray Amen,amen, amen.

(04:15):
Listen, I am all for resolutions.
I notice that when I'mscrolling on my social media,
I've seen a lot of DebbieDowners or people that are like
oh god, I don't want to hear nomore resolutions.
Let's not do that again.
But I'm all for you changing,evolving and wanting to even

(04:41):
make the effort to change thethings that you see that's an
issue or problem.
You know if you're smoking ordrinking or if you feel like you
need to lose weight, you knowit's okay.
Reinvent yourself as many timesas it takes for you to get it
right.
If you start and say, okay, I'mgonna exercise, and say you do
it for a week or two and thenyou fall off.

(05:03):
You know, go ahead and don'thave grace with yourself.
Don't be so hard on yourselfand go ahead and start that next
week.
Don't give up.
Keep trying.
There's nothing wrong withtrying to become who god needs
you to be.
You know that transformationhas to occur.
That's how we gained wisdom andknowledge in our lives.
That's how we we're tested andwe learn our lessons through

(05:28):
struggles and trials andtribulations.
And there's nothing wrong withwanting to change and to do
better and be better.
Okay, now.
Topic today is going to beboundaries.
Let me tell you something aboutthis y'all.
Can I give it?
Can I get real with you for aminute?
I've always been a peoplepleaser, always wanting to make

(05:49):
everybody else comfortable,always wanting to put a smile on
other people's faces, even ifI'm not comfortable, even if it
bothers me or if it makes me,you know, just feel bad or sad.
I just put other people beforeme.
I've learned to set boundaries.
I didn't even know what thatwas.

(06:09):
I've learned to say no, okay.
And that was really difficultfor me because I somehow felt
like I wasn't, um, a goodChristian or, uh, you know, I
love the Lord, so I'm.
You know, I want to do whateverhe wants me to do, but god does
not want you to put more on you.

(06:30):
You know that that you canhandle, especially when you feel
overwhelmed and you're stressedout and you feel triggered.
A lot of people will continue touse you, abuse you in any way
possible, because they know thatthey can.

(06:50):
And if they have problems whichyou said in boundaries is
because they know they can't useyou like they used to be able
to use you.
Now you're saying no, nowyou're not answering the phone
all the time like you used to.
You're actually taking time foryou, you're sorting out your
own life and there's nothingwrong with that for having peace

(07:12):
of mind.
Finally, you know, know is acomplete sentence.
It really is.
So if you say no to somebody,don't feel bad about it, don't
even feel like you have toexplain yourself, because at the
end of the day, you're going totry to explain and they still
are going to want their way, soit doesn't even matter if you
explain.

(07:32):
Communication is key and it'sgood to say you know, hey, I
don't like the way you talked tome the other day, or you know I
don't like when you said this.
It kind of triggered me.
Um, you know you can, you can,you can go there.
So that way they will know thatthis is what triggered you, you

(07:53):
know.
Or this is this makes you feelbad.
But if they don't care, evenafter you explain, sometimes you
have to think about removingyourself, because some people
like drama, some people believeit or not are toxic and they
will keep using you, they willkeep doing whatever it is that

(08:16):
ticks you off, makes you feeluncomfortable, makes you feel
less than they don't care,because they want what they want
and they feel entitled.
Well, guess what you'reentitled to, how you feel as
well about things.
Do not second guess yourself.
Do not put yourself in anuncompromised position just to

(08:36):
please someone else, to makethem happy all the time.
Now, if you're married, ofcourse you're compromised and
things like that.
On certain you know um things,but at the end of the day you
have to be happy, you have tofeel fulfilled, you have to be
okay and have peace of mind andsit with that and it's nothing

(08:58):
wrong with taking care of you.
First, self love, self care, isso important.
I didn't know that before I wastaking on all these different
things.
I got, you know, so much on myplate and now you want me to put
some of your stuff on my plateand I'm putting some of somebody
else's stuff on my plate andnow I'm stressed out.
And who should I be stressedout with myself because I'm

(09:19):
allowing it.
So when you continue to allowthese things to happen to you
and you don't make a stand, thenyou can't be mad at nobody.
But you, you have to learn howto say no and that's okay.
Listen, we're here to serve,you know, and love on one
another and it can't be kind.

(09:40):
And and then you know, dothings and you know, and Be
Christian like you know, so tospeak.
But at the end of the day, ifit's overwhelming you and you're
feeling stressed out and you'refeeling used and you can't
function well, then it's nothealthy.

(10:01):
So this year, 2024, we are goingto learn how to have healthier
relationships.
We're going to learn how to setthese boundaries and stand on
these boundaries and not bendthem For people and guess what,
if they don't want to go alongwith it and they have a problem
with it and they keep talking toyou and triggering you and
treating you, mistreating youand you know, let it go.

(10:24):
Sometimes you may have todisconnect from these people
because, at the end of the day,you want to be surrounded by
people that support you, loveyou and care about your
well-being.
Okay, so I just wanted to throwthat out there.
Definitely, do not feel badabout it.
You know we have family members, we have friends, we have

(10:45):
co-workers.
We have so many differentpeople that we deal with day to
day that we really have to setour boundaries and Not feel
convicted.
You know, by saying no or feelbad, you know that you told
someone no, if you can't do it,you can't do it.
Okay.
So I wanted you guys to knowthat if you have any Questions

(11:12):
or if you want to write in andtalk about something that's
important to you, if you want toget some advice from me.
I am a very wise woman and Idon't mind at all.
I will keep you anonymous ifyou want me to.
I will read your letter and Iwill Give you my advice.
Okay, so definitely, email tofree concepts podcast at

(11:37):
gmailcom.
That's, free concepts With an spodcast at gmailcom, and I want
to leave you with a little bitof affirmations.
Okay, I want you first to knowthat I love you.
I'm so proud of you.
If no one has told you that,and Stop being so hard on

(12:00):
yourself.
Show yourself a little grace.
Okay, give yourself grace.
God gives us grace.
He gives you know, mercy,forgiveness.
You got to give yourself grace,forgive yourself for a lot of
things.
But the affirmations I want youto repeat after me I Love me, I
Accept me for who I am.

(12:22):
I Am beautiful, I Am handsomethat's from a man out there.
I Am a value, I am enough, I Amamazing, I am different, I Am
unique and I love who I am and Ialso love who I'm becoming.

(12:49):
So when I leave you with that,just know that no matter what
anybody thinks of you, it's onlywhat you think about yourself.
People gonna talk whether you dogood or bad, guess what.
Don't worry about what they say, cause either way you're not

(13:09):
gonna be able to win.
Okay, they gonna talk about you.
You know when you're doing good, they gonna talk about you when
you're doing bad, so you mightas well.
Just what do you?
So do you boo, boo, love andembrace who you are?
Know that God has so much morefor you that this is just the
beginning not the end, but thisis the beginning.

(13:30):
Anytime you feel like thatsomething has ended, just know
that something else is about tobegin.
There are different levels, andjust know that we have different
tests.
That takes us to those levels.
If you pray for patience, godgonna set you up and he gonna
test you with your patience.
If you pray for whatever it isthat you pray for, basically

(13:55):
you're gonna get those tests.
So you might as well put onyour armor and expect those
tests to come your way so thatyou can go ahead and pass those
tests, so you can go ahead andreach the next level.
There's gonna be differentseasons in your life and they're
not gonna always look as goodas the last one, but it's okay.
Just know that God is doingsomething in you and this season

(14:18):
and he's transforming you intowho you need to be so that he
can get the glory and so you canfulfill your purpose.
So God bless you all.
I hope you guys have a happy,happy new year.
Enjoy it.
This is just what almost weektwo, so enjoy it.

(14:38):
I hope you guys have awonderful week.
I will definitely be back nextMonday.
Sorry, I took a week offbecause I had to regroup and get
it together from the scare thatI had with my granddaughter,
but she's better now.
Thank God, and I thank God foryou guys for listening.
Thank you for your support.
From 2023, and guess what?

(15:00):
2024, I'm expecting more ofyour support, more of your love
and just grateful and honoredthat you even took the time to
listen to free concepts.
Have a wonderful week, godbless you.