November 12, 2023 • 32 mins
Ever wondered how celebrity couples like Jada and Will Smith manage their relationships under the harsh glares of public scrutiny? We've got a captivating conversation for you, shining a light on the complexities of love and judgment in relationships and how they're magnified in the public eye. With compassion and understanding, we unpack the reality behind the perfect social media personas, reminding listeners that every long-term relationship has its share of highs and lows.
As we detangle this intricate web, we turn our focus to the importance of therapy and healing before diving into marriage. We'll share insights into why it's crucial to repair our broken pieces before embarking on a shared journey. Lastly, we will get into how the journey of self-love shapes our ability to love others, breathing life into the belief that we cannot pour from an empty cup. Join us on this enlightening adventure as we navigate life with love, compassion, and self-improvement.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Hello everyone.
Welcome to Free Concepts.
Thank you for joining us andlistening.
We have your host, of course,shaniqua.
We also have our co-host, today, d.
Hello everybody.
Yes, thank you guys.
We are climbing the charts,streaming on all podcast apps.
(00:28):
So we appreciate you and yoursupport.
So thank you once again.
And I know you said you weren'tfeeling that well, you know you
have slight headache, but I amgoing to start with the prayer
and then I'll discuss the topicand start off.
Okay, we're good, father, god,in the name of Jesus, god, we
(00:55):
thank you, god.
We thank you God for all things.
God, we thank you for thethings that are coming for us
right now.
God, the breakthroughs are here, god, bondage is broken,
generational curse is broken,shackles broken.
In the name of Jesus, god, god,we ask that you touch the
people that are listening.
Give us a word to say thatwe'll be able to change their
(01:15):
lives.
Lord, we thank you, god.
We ask for healing powers,father God, through D and myself
, and to just be able to discussyou and help people to
understand that you are love,just love, and God.
(01:37):
We just thank you for theopportunity.
We lift you up with the highestpraise, thanking you for your
grace, your mercy andforgiveness.
In Jesus' name we pray.
Amen, amen.
Okay, so I want to.
I guess the topic today will bejudgments or judging.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
And.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
I wanted to talk about how we are so easily
distracted by things or bypeople and their relationships,
and how we pass judgment onpeople's marriages, especially
celebrities, and I want to kindof speak a little bit on Jada
(02:24):
and Will, or the Jada and Willsof the world.
I want people to understandthat when people share their
lives with you, as she did withthe red table, it was for
educational purposes, to be ableto help you along your journey
by speaking her truths, samething that D and I do, and so
(02:49):
millions others that try tospeak their truth to help others
.
And it's really sad that we getto a place that if our
expectations or if those peoplearen't meeting our expectations
anymore, that we tear them downand we trash them, and I want us
(03:12):
to start giving the same graceas God gives us.
You know, nobody's perfect.
We're all on this journeytogether and my path may not
look like yours, but at the endof the day, it's not for me to
judge.
I just want to love you rightwhere you are, and I believe
that's how God does us.
(03:32):
He loves us right where we are.
He's designed us and created us, so it's already written.
He already knows what we'regoing to do and the test that we
overcome and so forth, you know.
So he's with us along on thejourney and I would like for us
to just start having morecompassion for people, because
(03:54):
you know like who's going tolaugh and joke about somebody's
divorce or separation,especially when they have
children as well, you know thatare involved.
What do you think about thewhole Jato wheel situation?
As much as you have heard orwatched streaming.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I just think that their business is their business
, and I know that they put itout there again, just what you
said everybody love language isdifferent.
Everybody's marriage isdifferent to everybody and I
believe that's the problem withsociety.
Everybody thinks it should beone way, this should be this way
, this should be that way, andif you don't do this this way,
(04:35):
in this way and that way, theneverybody has a pain on
everything, which is everybody'sright to have a pain.
But, as you said before, ifyou're rocking with somebody,
then rock with them.
Don't tear them down, becausetheir love language doesn't look
like what your love languagelooks like.
You know, and everybody haveproblems and when people married
and how they deal with it intheir ways, it's their business
(04:55):
and I thank God that will stoodup for her and came in her
defense and said you know, thisis us, unapologetically, you
know sloppy, unconditional loveand, like he said, that's what
we have unconditional love.
And whether they choose to staymarried or they choose to, you
know separate and stay marriedand live their separate lives.
Like you know, divorce isnobody's business and the fact
(05:17):
that, like you said, they'reputting it out there just
because they want to, because somany people have, as you said
before and talked about them andtalked about he's doing this
and she doing that and he she'sdisrespecting him.
And you know what I'm saying?
As humans, we all make mistakes, we all fall short and there's
no perfect marriage.
There's no perfect, I don'tcare how good it looks on social
(05:39):
media.
Social media where everybodyportrays oh, we're so happy, so
this is so great.
If you're married for a longpercent of a time, you're going
to grow and be evolving togetherand you're going to change and
you're going to have your ups,you're going to have your downs.
Like for instance, I watchedthe show I don't know.
I know you've watched it beforea couple episodes of Black Love
(06:01):
and they talk about theirmarriages and the ups and downs
and the things that you gothrough, and it's just the point
blank.
If you're going to do somethingwith somebody and you love them
and you want to share that,like she wanted to share, like
you said, the red table wassomething where she could help
people and give people an outletto speak about things they
would probably not have spokeabout.
You know what I'm saying and,just to be you know, her
(06:23):
daughter and her mom that sitthere and, you know, be a
comfort to people that's goingthrough things that want to put
stuff out there.
Either you know I'm sayingenjoy them, but don't tear them
down because they're doingsomething and you're not doing
something.
So don't tear them down forwhat they're saying and what
they're sharing with you.
Either I, you know, I believein the quote if you don't have
nothing good to say, don't saynothing at all.
I was just going to say that Areso judgmental nowadays that
(06:47):
they feel like they have a rightto judge people.
And we're not here to judge,like you said, we're here to
love.
God is love, so we should beloved.
If we're not loving oruplifting somebody, then we
shouldn't tear them down.
And that just goes back to whatwe talked about last week.
You know, you, you, you, thatthat anger, that because you're
(07:07):
unhappy in your situation, thenyou want to put that off on them
.
But if they're living their lifeand, like you know, everybody
was saying oh, she dog willallow blah, blah, blah.
But he said it himself, healready knew about it, so he
wouldn't have got on the reartable and he was doing stuff to
the fat and he spoke up in hisbook and said you know, I did my
dirt too, so stop tearing herdown.
(07:27):
It says everybody just want topick apart people, and that's
what I do not like in socialmedia that you, you know.
Even off somebody's comment,like you're judging people,
you're tearing them down.
If that's what they tell you,you don't like it, then get off
their page.
You don't have to leave acomment If you don't agree then
don't agree.
Just go to the next person, goto the next comment.
You know it's like, and I knowwe all have freedom of speech,
(07:51):
but I mean at what point?
Who, who, who made you the bossof the judge, of anybody?
You know what I'm saying Godgives us all free will.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
So exactly, exactly.
And you know we mess up all thetime.
We make mistakes, and that's.
You know how we learn.
You know we make mistakes inorder to be better, to do better
and not repeat the samemistakes.
And it this is the thing Womencheat, men cheat.
(08:21):
You know what I'm saying.
We always try to say, oh, allmen or all women, you know, or
we try to put people in a box.
It's the individual.
You have some men that arecheat.
You have some women that youknow, don't?
You know I mean cheat as well.
It just depends on the situationyou know, in their marriage.
And you know I respect peoplethat love each other enough to
(08:44):
want to heal, to want to growand change and find out what it
is that you want.
A lot of people get divorcedbecause they don't want to do
the work, they don't want tofind out well, what it is that
I'm doing wrong Cause then youhave to take accountability, or
what is it that I could be doingbetter?
And I think if we communicatedthat and we were more honest in
(09:08):
our relationships, cause you sowhat?
You might have a relationshipthat somebody's been together
from 25 to 40 years, but at theend of the day, are they happy
for those 24 years?
Even I think Michelle Obamasaid that she was.
She would yeah, for 10 years.
Did she Her question?
Speaker 2 (09:26):
I heard and that was amazing for her to say that.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
How many people look up to her.
But for her to encourage tospeak like marriage is hard,
like it's a couple that they dois called marriage be hard I
forgot the name of them.
It's a couple that do it andthey do interviews and interview
married couples, but it's noteasy.
It's not easy cause it's twodifferent people, but we're all
(09:53):
different, we're built different, we're ways different and then
you come in as one and you poseto be as one.
But that's a journey.
Like TeeDee Jake said, marriagetake, a wedding take 30 minutes
, but marriage takes 30 years.
You just gotta be willing to putinto work.
If you're not, like you said,you know, let go of the person.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
So that you can get separated.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
bro, If you love somebody enough, you let them go
.
You don't want to hold themhostage because you're insecure
that you may not be able to findsomebody else.
Or you feel like you don't wantthem with nobody if it's not
you and they can't, I don't wantthem to be with nobody else, so
I'm gonna just say I'm notgoing to you know, oh, you know,
it's all about love at the endof the day, Love, I mean, that's
what we're missing in thisworld love.
(10:39):
We just to reiterate that God islove.
God is a God of love.
He put us there to love andgrow and heal and rebuild and
elevate and motivate andactivate.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
You know, it's not each one Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
And if you want to be , negative, then be quiet.
That's just my Exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:58):
Yeah, if you don't have nothing nice to say, then
you'll need to say nothing atall period.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
That's how I was raised, you know.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
So, like you said, if you're reading or if you see a
post, then you just scroll pastthe post.
You don't have to tear themdown and beat them up.
You know what I'm saying?
It's just it's not necessary.
We have enough hate in thisworld.
We need to love and cometogether and, you know, show
their compassion and show that.
I like the fact that you knowthey not just them, but so many
(11:25):
people share their stories andthey're authentic and
transparent.
So, because there's so many,like you said, you see posts
that everybody acts like they'redoing so well and so great in
their life and their marriage isso perfect or their
relationship, and there'snothing you know such as a
perfect relationship or even aperfect person.
You know we're changing, likeyou said, and evolving, and you
(11:51):
know we're growing and I mightchange.
Say, if you got together whenyou were, say, 21, and you were
high school sweethearts andeverything that you got married,
you want different things asthe years go on.
You don't always want.
You're not gonna stay stuck andbe the same person that you
were when you 21,.
(12:12):
When you're now 30, you knowyou have different goals, you
have a different outlook on lifeand, like you said you know we
change and it's enough for youto change.
You know, you know just as anindividual, and then now you're
dealing with someone else, ifyou're married, you have to then
(12:35):
watch them change or kind oflike, you know, go along with
their change and your change.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
So Right with the journey and it's all about
growing and accepting and notand just in my heart, I believe
that if you're gonna be withsomebody, you should be willing
to wanna see them growing thebest in them as well as they
wanna see that best in youshould be reciprocated.
You know what I'm saying andyou're in this marriage to build
and grow, and that's why youknow, as we had our relationship
(13:04):
on what?
Speaker 1 (13:05):
two weeks to go?
Three weeks to go?
Speaker 2 (13:07):
communication about what you find in a mate.
You wanna have thesediscussions before you even get
together.
Like what is your?
Like your religion?
What is your?
What do you feel about buying ahouse?
Speaker 1 (13:20):
growing and building.
You wanna be on the same?
Speaker 2 (13:22):
yeah, how many kids you know you should be on some
type of a same page, or else youshouldn't even be getting
married.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
And but a lot of people vary for the long reasons
but go ahead, Absolutely,absolutely, I totally agree with
that.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
And but as you are married and you guys have, okay,
came together and had this andI believe, canceling before you
get married therapy canceling dothat together and separately,
and sometimes you need to do itseparately and together, but
definitely so you can be on thesame page and you have somebody
that's you know, you can talk to, that doesn't have anything to
(13:57):
lose or gain.
So there's a pastor, church,whatever, just therapy before
marriage, because I believe thatwill help a lot of marriages.
And I'm just speaking, this isjust my opinion that you know
what I'm saying?
Because in a marriage, if youdon't like change, then you
shouldn't get married.
Everybody's supposed to changeand gonna evolve, and even as
(14:18):
your mate grows in and everybodyhas a chance to change their
mind absolutely.
You can have yourself in arelationship.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
You know it's a lot of times we imagine what we want
in a relationship and we wantthis person to meet our
expectations of what we want orwhat we envision in our heads,
and then, when they don't wantto go along with it because they
have their own ideas of youknow, of what a relationship
(14:50):
looks like or a healthy marriagelooks like, then you guys are
bumping heads, you know, andyou're wanting the person to be
what you expect them to be foryou, but they also have to be
who they need to be for God, whoGod created them to be.
So I really believe that peopleneed to heal, become whole and
(15:12):
then, like you said, have thatdiscussion.
If they do get together andthen move forward in that
direction because two brokenpeople and that's damaged too
you're not gonna have a healthyrelationship.
And then, when you are marriedand say you're broken, then you
have to figure these things outtogether.
(15:32):
You know what I mean.
It's like I gotta fix my brokenself and you have to fix your
broken self, but we're trying tomerge together and it's not
gonna work, you know.
Unless you put in the time andeffort and, like you said, you
need to get therapy to helpguide you through that.
(15:55):
And you know, pray, our yes,definitely pray.
I always believe that a familythat prays together stays
together.
But at the same time, you doneed that extra therapy and I
know that we were taught, youknow, not to get therapy a lot
of us in that culture, in ourculture but, yeah, we need
(16:17):
therapy.
We need therapy and there'snothing wrong with it because
it's saying you love yourselfenough to be able to unpack
those things that you havecarried along with you
throughout the years and youwant to heal, which means you
want to do better.
You want to be the best versionthat God created you to be, and
(16:40):
I think that's a beautifulthing, you know.
But we definitely have to havegrace with people and stop
tearing people down as soon asyou get a chance.
You know that's just what kindof person you know a miserable
person that tears people downfor telling their truth, sharing
their truths and, like I saidbefore, they even shared
(17:02):
anything, or not just them, butany other celebrity or even just
people in general.
When they share things, it'sreally too.
Like I said, it's to educateyou, to help you through your
journey, so you don't feel likeyou're alone and you're.
You know a lot of people outhere unaliving themselves and
because they feel like they'redifferent, they're weird, they
(17:23):
don't belong and so forth, andyou never know when someone is
going through something and whatmay take them off the edge and
that blood is on your hands.
You know what I'm saying.
If you, you know, judgingsomeone and you talking about
them and you adding to thecomments to say somebody did
unalive themselves, that bloodis on your hands, you know.
(17:45):
And who wants that kind ofkarma?
And people need to mind abusiness and do the work on
themselves and if they did that,they wouldn't have room to
judge anybody else and whatthey're doing, you know.
I think we need to get to thatplace of doing the work and what
either?
(18:05):
Just being quiet about otherpeople's relationships you know
it's their relationship and somany people bashing her about
the book and things like thatand just it's just terrible.
It's not just them, it's.
I see this all the time.
If anybody's in a relationship,they rock with them at first,
(18:26):
as soon as they get in arelationship or as soon as they
do something that you don'tagree with, and that's another
thing.
We can agree to disagree.
We don't have to hate theperson or just talk about them
because they don't measure up towhat we thought or they don't
(18:46):
agree with us and so forth, likenow.
People are canceling people forjust speaking their truth and
just living their lives.
You know.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
All right, I just believe it all starts.
It all goes back to self.
If you love yourself and yourespect yourself, then you'll
respect others, yeah if you'remiserable on the inside and you
hate it on the inside and you'reinsecure, and then you take it
out on other people.
Then that's why this world isso corrupt and just angry.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Everybody's mad.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
everybody's angry but it's misguided, as our episode
before Mm-hmm we spoke about andit's not, and you're taking it
out on the wrong people, likelike you said I really believe
that people are just speakingout to help Not to harm, but to
help.
They're just and it's justtheir, their lives and what
they've been through, andthey're willing to open up and
share that, and that takescourage and especially, like you
(19:40):
said, with celebrities and justpeople in general and
somebody's willing to open upand share something.
Don't tear them up.
If you don't like what they say, then just turn it off, don't
listen or, again, social mediastroll past it.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Yeah, everything for everyone, everybody's different,
different folks, differentstrokes.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
So just let people be free, let people live, just
live, lack and love.
This world will just bebeautiful of Beautiful souls and
beautiful people, just justlove.
This is all about.
It all comes down to love andif you love yourself, bottom
line, you won't want to tearanybody else down and self care
is worth it.
(20:17):
Take the time to love you, loveyourself and that and again it
goes back to so you're gonna bein a relationship with somebody.
You got to love yourself andthis is me speaking, my
experience Trying to love otherpeople and and heal them when
I'm not even healed myself.
So I'm speaking for myself.
I'm not telling everybody elsewhat to do, but I'm just saying
(20:38):
you got to love yourself.
You got to be Encourageyourself and be happy with the
end, so you can spread love andnot tear it down.
And and you also got to loveyourself in order to be able to
receive love from someone else.
Show people how to love you.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
You got to teach people how to treat you if you
don't love you, if you don'tknow you, how do you love you?
You know?
you know a lot of people don'teven know who they are.
So and I and we're speakingfrom experience, definitely
speaking from experience thatI've tried it different ways.
You know, I tried Marriages andI try to be single and you know
(21:21):
what was best for me and soforth, but it's all what I've
learned is that it's how I heal,treat myself.
Go within, unpack those thingsso that I'm able to love someone
the way God intended us to lovesomeone.
You know, and it'sunconditional love.
(21:41):
Unconditional means that no,like how we love our children,
you know, or Probably love ourparents.
You know people that, of course, have healthy relationships
with their children and parents.
But when you that's anunconditional love, my children
get on my nerves and I'll talk,john, but at the end of the day
I'm a ride or die.
For you know I'm saying like,don't play with my kids.
(22:04):
You know People with a mama,they don't play with my mama.
You know I'm saying we have ourups and downs.
I can talk about it, but youcan't say nothing about our type
of thing.
You know what I mean.
So, but it's supposed to beunconditional love.
You're gonna love them throughit all and at the end of the day
it's worth it.
And if you can't, then it's okayto walk away and say you know
what?
We had a good ride and now youknow it's time to go.
(22:29):
You know you need to heal.
I need to heal, you know, andtake care of me.
Do some self-care, self-loveand and wish them well.
You know it shouldn't be anyanger and all of that.
Now I know we're human nowtimes, especially like when we
first get divorced or separatedusually you know it's a mixed
emotions and all of that.
But If you really love theperson, you'll come back to love
(22:54):
, whether it's a year down aline, two years or whatever.
How many years?
And especially if you havechildren together you have to be
a good person.
Together you have to be able tobe adults about things and
handle things in a morehealthier, appropriate way.
And Because you, because you're, teaching those kids.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
What they see, you do , and you know if you're talking
about the dad or the mom.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Are you?
Speaker 2 (23:18):
keeping them away from the dad or the mom, you're
hurting a child.
Think about the child, put themfirst, especially Marriage with
children.
People just food for thought.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
You know I'm saying yeah, cuz you said an example.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Let them be the judges.
They grow older, They'll seewhether that parent really loved
him or kid or not.
They'll see actress me yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
I used to Not because you all would.
I used to and I think I sharedthis with you, with my son's
father I would buy Christmasgifts if, even if they didn't
get a Christmas gift or if theydidn't send a birthday card or,
and you know, a birthday gift, Iwould go ahead and purchase it
(24:03):
myself and I will put from youknow their dad and the reason
why I did it.
It wasn't for the dads and cuzpeople thought I was crazy.
It was like girl I'm when, youknow.
But I did it for my childrenbecause I never wanted them to
feel like they weren't loved bytheir fathers or, you know, they
didn't think enough of them toto get them something for
(24:25):
Christmas or birthdays.
You know what I mean and Do.
Did I always, you know, like weyou know my exes we had some
issues, but when it came to ourchildren, we always were cordial
and Try to.
You know you put on the face,sometimes you put on the mask,
(24:50):
but, um, I just thought it wasimportant.
I never wanted my kids to feellike they weren't loved by their
parent.
So it's sometimes we just dothings for our children to make
it easy and better for them andas they got older, you know,
they need to talk about theirdad's, like they were gold honey
, like they were the best thingpopping and I knew different.
(25:14):
But I was gonna let them justsee.
You know, I'm saying when theygot older, you know, and they
saw for themselves, I didn'teven have to go into a whole
spill of what you know.
The daddy ain't this, ain't thatDa-da-da-da-da-da-da-da, they
figured it out.
Did it irk my nerves sometimes?
Would they put them on a highpedestal?
Yes, but I didn't want to takethat away from them.
(25:37):
They're joy, you know, and Ithink that a lot of people
should, like you said, justthink about your children and
especially when children areinvolved, we need to just not
beat up people and talk aboutbecause you're talking about
somebody's parents, like they'retalking about William and Jada,
but at the same time that'sstill Jada and parents
(26:01):
Appearance Willow's parentsexactly when they see those
comments.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
They see it and tearing their mother down under
the father like man I just love.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
And they just sharing their story to be able to help
people the same way we are.
That's why a long time I didn'twant to write my book or finish
it or even get on here to talkto people about my truth,
because I felt like I would bejudged.
But at the end of the day, Idon't care anymore what people
think.
(26:29):
This was my journey, this iswhat I went through, and if we
could help one person and thisis why you're on here as well we
could help one person to changetheir lives for the better and
let them know they're not alone,and any encouragement that we
give that if it changessomeone's life, then that's fine
.
But at the end of the day, weneed to get better with our
(26:53):
words, because the power of thetongue is life or death that we
speak and we have to be carefuland mindful of what we say at
our mouths.
You know.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Absolutely, absolutely.
Like I said, everybody's justgot to let each one live.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Everybody's love language is different.
Everybody deserves a chance tolove and be who they are without
being tore down and at the endof the day, like you said, I'm
just saying we don't care whatnobody thinks about me as long
as I'm doing what God put in myheart to do.
If God is for me, who could beagainst me?
Here be a point blank.
(27:36):
If people are going to judgeyou, no matter what you do,
whether you do everything forthem.
You could give them a milliondollars, and then they'll still
talk.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
They'll say a million five Exactly you know what I'm
saying?
Speaker 2 (27:47):
It's never enough.
So you know, and even, like yousaid, with celebrities, they
cook, they cook them up, theycook, they brush them up, yep.
And then they tear them down assoon as what they don't like.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
And these people paved the way for us.
You know, like theopportunities that we didn't
have now we do have in acting,production, sports, all kinds of
you know, and you're cancelingthem.
Like we need to respect people.
I think that's the biggestthing is having respect for
(28:23):
someone else.
And because a lot of peoplewere saying I don't respect her
and this, and that I respectanyone that's going to be honest
and authentic and genuine andspeak their truths to, because
that's not easy.
It's not easy telling yourstories.
It's not easy telling the bad,you know it's easy to tell the
(28:44):
good, you know.
Oh, look at us, we're doinggreat, you know, and behind
closed doors you're miserable.
You're fighting, you fuss andcussing, acting crazy, and in
front of the children too.
And so I respect her to haveenough courage to not only about
the whole slap, you know, afterthat instance, then now you
(29:07):
know she's coming out with herbook and sharing more, like it's
not stopping her, she's likeyou know, this is my story.
You know I didn't go throughthis, you know, in vain.
So I have a story to tell andI'm going to tell it, and I
think more people need to sharetheir stories and their
testimonies of what God hasbrought them through, to give
other people hope as well to getthrough this journey, because
(29:29):
this is tough.
You know Life is.
It's not easy, but it'sdefinitely worth it if you
continue to fight and youcontinue to go through.
You know, whatever God bringyou to, he's gonna bring you
through amen.
Anything else you want to saybefore we Sign off?
(29:50):
Just Everybody.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Just again back to the point.
Just love.
God is love, be love, give loveand Love yourself, love
yourself, take time for yourself, get to know you, because you
can't love nobody else.
If you don't love you, youshouldn't be judging anybody
else.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
I mean it's not our job to judge.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
It's our job to live, motivate and educate period.
We got to be careful.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
Judging people and saying never.
Remember we said that beforeabout when you say never God
will put you in a very positionor a situation that you said oh,
I would never be a stripper, Iwould never date women, or I
would never date, you know, Iwould never do that with my kids
, and so forth.
You just never know whatposition you're in until you're
in it and and that's why I'llnever say never, no more,
(30:39):
because God has always put me ina position oh, you think you're
better than them.
You know I'm saying, oh, youthink that you're better than
that.
That couldn't happen to you.
And then you find yourself init.
You're like oh, wow, and yousee things differently when
you're in those shoes, you knowso, um, yeah, just give people
(31:00):
grace, guys.
We love you guys so much and wejust thank you.
I know the journey is difficultand I know things change every
day, but my advice is to not goagainst the grain, to just flow,
you know, with the water, likethe river, just flow with it,
don't, you know, becauseotherwise it's gonna take you a
(31:23):
lifetime to get it right if youstart just kind of going with
the flow Of what God is tryingto show you and I know it's
uncomfortable because changenobody likes change, but at the
end of the day is definitelygonna be worth it.
Just, you know love.
And another thing stop gettingmarried for for other purposes
(31:45):
other than love.
You know, not for money, notbecause she got a fat booty, or
because you know he's got this,he's got that, he's got a house,
you know, and all of that, thematerial stuff, you know,
because that's not what it's allabout in the first place.
Really, marriage is supposed tobe about being in love, loving
(32:09):
someone enough to Go throughanything with them.
You know so Absolutely live,love, laugh.
Yeah, thank you everybody forlistening.
Speaker 2 (32:23):
And say bless, be blessed.
Bread, love and not hate.
Speaker 1 (32:27):
Yes, thank you for that, everyone, have a blessed
one.
We will see you next Monday andContinue to share and download.
If you have any questions or ifyou have anything we want to.
You want us to even read, ifyou want to Write in to free
concepts podcast at gmailcom.
(32:47):
Everyone, have a wonderful week.
Talk to you soon.
Hello everyone.
Welcome to Free Concepts.
Thank you for joining us andlistening.
We have your host, of course,shaniqua.
We also have our co-host, today, d.
Hello everybody.
Yes, thank you guys.
We are climbing the charts,streaming on all podcast apps.
(00:28):
So we appreciate you and yoursupport.
So thank you once again.
And I know you said you weren'tfeeling that well, you know you
have slight headache, but I amgoing to start with the prayer
and then I'll discuss the topicand start off.
Okay, we're good, father, god,in the name of Jesus, god, we
(00:55):
thank you, god.
We thank you God for all things.
God, we thank you for thethings that are coming for us
right now.
God, the breakthroughs are here, god, bondage is broken,
generational curse is broken,shackles broken.
In the name of Jesus, god, god,we ask that you touch the
people that are listening.
Give us a word to say thatwe'll be able to change their
(01:15):
lives.
Lord, we thank you, god.
We ask for healing powers,father God, through D and myself
, and to just be able to discussyou and help people to
understand that you are love,just love, and God.
(01:37):
We just thank you for theopportunity.
We lift you up with the highestpraise, thanking you for your
grace, your mercy andforgiveness.
In Jesus' name we pray.
Amen, amen.
Okay, so I want to.
I guess the topic today will bejudgments or judging.
Speaker 2 (02:00):
And.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
I wanted to talk about how we are so easily
distracted by things or bypeople and their relationships,
and how we pass judgment onpeople's marriages, especially
celebrities, and I want to kindof speak a little bit on Jada
(02:24):
and Will, or the Jada and Willsof the world.
I want people to understandthat when people share their
lives with you, as she did withthe red table, it was for
educational purposes, to be ableto help you along your journey
by speaking her truths, samething that D and I do, and so
(02:49):
millions others that try tospeak their truth to help others
.
And it's really sad that we getto a place that if our
expectations or if those peoplearen't meeting our expectations
anymore, that we tear them downand we trash them, and I want us
(03:12):
to start giving the same graceas God gives us.
You know, nobody's perfect.
We're all on this journeytogether and my path may not
look like yours, but at the endof the day, it's not for me to
judge.
I just want to love you rightwhere you are, and I believe
that's how God does us.
(03:32):
He loves us right where we are.
He's designed us and created us, so it's already written.
He already knows what we'regoing to do and the test that we
overcome and so forth, you know.
So he's with us along on thejourney and I would like for us
to just start having morecompassion for people, because
(03:54):
you know like who's going tolaugh and joke about somebody's
divorce or separation,especially when they have
children as well, you know thatare involved.
What do you think about thewhole Jato wheel situation?
As much as you have heard orwatched streaming.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
I just think that their business is their business
, and I know that they put itout there again, just what you
said everybody love language isdifferent.
Everybody's marriage isdifferent to everybody and I
believe that's the problem withsociety.
Everybody thinks it should beone way, this should be this way
, this should be that way, andif you don't do this this way,
(04:35):
in this way and that way, theneverybody has a pain on
everything, which is everybody'sright to have a pain.
But, as you said before, ifyou're rocking with somebody,
then rock with them.
Don't tear them down, becausetheir love language doesn't look
like what your love languagelooks like.
You know, and everybody haveproblems and when people married
and how they deal with it intheir ways, it's their business
(04:55):
and I thank God that will stoodup for her and came in her
defense and said you know, thisis us, unapologetically, you
know sloppy, unconditional loveand, like he said, that's what
we have unconditional love.
And whether they choose to staymarried or they choose to, you
know separate and stay marriedand live their separate lives.
Like you know, divorce isnobody's business and the fact
(05:17):
that, like you said, they'reputting it out there just
because they want to, because somany people have, as you said
before and talked about them andtalked about he's doing this
and she doing that and he she'sdisrespecting him.
And you know what I'm saying?
As humans, we all make mistakes, we all fall short and there's
no perfect marriage.
There's no perfect, I don'tcare how good it looks on social
(05:39):
media.
Social media where everybodyportrays oh, we're so happy, so
this is so great.
If you're married for a longpercent of a time, you're going
to grow and be evolving togetherand you're going to change and
you're going to have your ups,you're going to have your downs.
Like for instance, I watchedthe show I don't know.
I know you've watched it beforea couple episodes of Black Love
(06:01):
and they talk about theirmarriages and the ups and downs
and the things that you gothrough, and it's just the point
blank.
If you're going to do somethingwith somebody and you love them
and you want to share that,like she wanted to share, like
you said, the red table wassomething where she could help
people and give people an outletto speak about things they
would probably not have spokeabout.
You know what I'm saying and,just to be you know, her
(06:23):
daughter and her mom that sitthere and, you know, be a
comfort to people that's goingthrough things that want to put
stuff out there.
Either you know I'm sayingenjoy them, but don't tear them
down because they're doingsomething and you're not doing
something.
So don't tear them down forwhat they're saying and what
they're sharing with you.
Either I, you know, I believein the quote if you don't have
nothing good to say, don't saynothing at all.
I was just going to say that Areso judgmental nowadays that
(06:47):
they feel like they have a rightto judge people.
And we're not here to judge,like you said, we're here to
love.
God is love, so we should beloved.
If we're not loving oruplifting somebody, then we
shouldn't tear them down.
And that just goes back to whatwe talked about last week.
You know, you, you, you, thatthat anger, that because you're
(07:07):
unhappy in your situation, thenyou want to put that off on them
.
But if they're living their lifeand, like you know, everybody
was saying oh, she dog willallow blah, blah, blah.
But he said it himself, healready knew about it, so he
wouldn't have got on the reartable and he was doing stuff to
the fat and he spoke up in hisbook and said you know, I did my
dirt too, so stop tearing herdown.
(07:27):
It says everybody just want topick apart people, and that's
what I do not like in socialmedia that you, you know.
Even off somebody's comment,like you're judging people,
you're tearing them down.
If that's what they tell you,you don't like it, then get off
their page.
You don't have to leave acomment If you don't agree then
don't agree.
Just go to the next person, goto the next comment.
You know it's like, and I knowwe all have freedom of speech,
(07:51):
but I mean at what point?
Who, who, who made you the bossof the judge, of anybody?
You know what I'm saying Godgives us all free will.
Speaker 1 (08:00):
So exactly, exactly.
And you know we mess up all thetime.
We make mistakes, and that's.
You know how we learn.
You know we make mistakes inorder to be better, to do better
and not repeat the samemistakes.
And it this is the thing Womencheat, men cheat.
(08:21):
You know what I'm saying.
We always try to say, oh, allmen or all women, you know, or
we try to put people in a box.
It's the individual.
You have some men that arecheat.
You have some women that youknow, don't?
You know I mean cheat as well.
It just depends on the situationyou know, in their marriage.
And you know I respect peoplethat love each other enough to
(08:44):
want to heal, to want to growand change and find out what it
is that you want.
A lot of people get divorcedbecause they don't want to do
the work, they don't want tofind out well, what it is that
I'm doing wrong Cause then youhave to take accountability, or
what is it that I could be doingbetter?
And I think if we communicatedthat and we were more honest in
(09:08):
our relationships, cause you sowhat?
You might have a relationshipthat somebody's been together
from 25 to 40 years, but at theend of the day, are they happy
for those 24 years?
Even I think Michelle Obamasaid that she was.
She would yeah, for 10 years.
Did she Her question?
Speaker 2 (09:26):
I heard and that was amazing for her to say that.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
How many people look up to her.
But for her to encourage tospeak like marriage is hard,
like it's a couple that they dois called marriage be hard I
forgot the name of them.
It's a couple that do it andthey do interviews and interview
married couples, but it's noteasy.
It's not easy cause it's twodifferent people, but we're all
(09:53):
different, we're built different, we're ways different and then
you come in as one and you poseto be as one.
But that's a journey.
Like TeeDee Jake said, marriagetake, a wedding take 30 minutes
, but marriage takes 30 years.
You just gotta be willing to putinto work.
If you're not, like you said,you know, let go of the person.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
So that you can get separated.
Speaker 2 (10:17):
bro, If you love somebody enough, you let them go
.
You don't want to hold themhostage because you're insecure
that you may not be able to findsomebody else.
Or you feel like you don't wantthem with nobody if it's not
you and they can't, I don't wantthem to be with nobody else, so
I'm gonna just say I'm notgoing to you know, oh, you know,
it's all about love at the endof the day, Love, I mean, that's
what we're missing in thisworld love.
(10:39):
We just to reiterate that God islove.
God is a God of love.
He put us there to love andgrow and heal and rebuild and
elevate and motivate andactivate.
Speaker 1 (10:49):
You know, it's not each one Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
And if you want to be , negative, then be quiet.
That's just my Exactly.
Speaker 1 (10:58):
Yeah, if you don't have nothing nice to say, then
you'll need to say nothing atall period.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
That's how I was raised, you know.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
So, like you said, if you're reading or if you see a
post, then you just scroll pastthe post.
You don't have to tear themdown and beat them up.
You know what I'm saying?
It's just it's not necessary.
We have enough hate in thisworld.
We need to love and cometogether and, you know, show
their compassion and show that.
I like the fact that you knowthey not just them, but so many
(11:25):
people share their stories andthey're authentic and
transparent.
So, because there's so many,like you said, you see posts
that everybody acts like they'redoing so well and so great in
their life and their marriage isso perfect or their
relationship, and there'snothing you know such as a
perfect relationship or even aperfect person.
You know we're changing, likeyou said, and evolving, and you
(11:51):
know we're growing and I mightchange.
Say, if you got together whenyou were, say, 21, and you were
high school sweethearts andeverything that you got married,
you want different things asthe years go on.
You don't always want.
You're not gonna stay stuck andbe the same person that you
were when you 21,.
(12:12):
When you're now 30, you knowyou have different goals, you
have a different outlook on lifeand, like you said you know we
change and it's enough for youto change.
You know, you know just as anindividual, and then now you're
dealing with someone else, ifyou're married, you have to then
(12:35):
watch them change or kind oflike, you know, go along with
their change and your change.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
So Right with the journey and it's all about
growing and accepting and notand just in my heart, I believe
that if you're gonna be withsomebody, you should be willing
to wanna see them growing thebest in them as well as they
wanna see that best in youshould be reciprocated.
You know what I'm saying andyou're in this marriage to build
and grow, and that's why youknow, as we had our relationship
(13:04):
on what?
Speaker 1 (13:05):
two weeks to go?
Three weeks to go?
Speaker 2 (13:07):
communication about what you find in a mate.
You wanna have thesediscussions before you even get
together.
Like what is your?
Like your religion?
What is your?
What do you feel about buying ahouse?
Speaker 1 (13:20):
growing and building.
You wanna be on the same?
Speaker 2 (13:22):
yeah, how many kids you know you should be on some
type of a same page, or else youshouldn't even be getting
married.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
And but a lot of people vary for the long reasons
but go ahead, Absolutely,absolutely, I totally agree with
that.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
And but as you are married and you guys have, okay,
came together and had this andI believe, canceling before you
get married therapy canceling dothat together and separately,
and sometimes you need to do itseparately and together, but
definitely so you can be on thesame page and you have somebody
that's you know, you can talk to, that doesn't have anything to
(13:57):
lose or gain.
So there's a pastor, church,whatever, just therapy before
marriage, because I believe thatwill help a lot of marriages.
And I'm just speaking, this isjust my opinion that you know
what I'm saying?
Because in a marriage, if youdon't like change, then you
shouldn't get married.
Everybody's supposed to changeand gonna evolve, and even as
(14:18):
your mate grows in and everybodyhas a chance to change their
mind absolutely.
You can have yourself in arelationship.
Speaker 1 (14:26):
You know it's a lot of times we imagine what we want
in a relationship and we wantthis person to meet our
expectations of what we want orwhat we envision in our heads,
and then, when they don't wantto go along with it because they
have their own ideas of youknow, of what a relationship
(14:50):
looks like or a healthy marriagelooks like, then you guys are
bumping heads, you know, andyou're wanting the person to be
what you expect them to be foryou, but they also have to be
who they need to be for God, whoGod created them to be.
So I really believe that peopleneed to heal, become whole and
(15:12):
then, like you said, have thatdiscussion.
If they do get together andthen move forward in that
direction because two brokenpeople and that's damaged too
you're not gonna have a healthyrelationship.
And then, when you are marriedand say you're broken, then you
have to figure these things outtogether.
(15:32):
You know what I mean.
It's like I gotta fix my brokenself and you have to fix your
broken self, but we're trying tomerge together and it's not
gonna work, you know.
Unless you put in the time andeffort and, like you said, you
need to get therapy to helpguide you through that.
(15:55):
And you know, pray, our yes,definitely pray.
I always believe that a familythat prays together stays
together.
But at the same time, you doneed that extra therapy and I
know that we were taught, youknow, not to get therapy a lot
of us in that culture, in ourculture but, yeah, we need
(16:17):
therapy.
We need therapy and there'snothing wrong with it because
it's saying you love yourselfenough to be able to unpack
those things that you havecarried along with you
throughout the years and youwant to heal, which means you
want to do better.
You want to be the best versionthat God created you to be, and
(16:40):
I think that's a beautifulthing, you know.
But we definitely have to havegrace with people and stop
tearing people down as soon asyou get a chance.
You know that's just what kindof person you know a miserable
person that tears people downfor telling their truth, sharing
their truths and, like I saidbefore, they even shared
(17:02):
anything, or not just them, butany other celebrity or even just
people in general.
When they share things, it'sreally too.
Like I said, it's to educateyou, to help you through your
journey, so you don't feel likeyou're alone and you're.
You know a lot of people outhere unaliving themselves and
because they feel like they'redifferent, they're weird, they
(17:23):
don't belong and so forth, andyou never know when someone is
going through something and whatmay take them off the edge and
that blood is on your hands.
You know what I'm saying.
If you, you know, judgingsomeone and you talking about
them and you adding to thecomments to say somebody did
unalive themselves, that bloodis on your hands, you know.
(17:45):
And who wants that kind ofkarma?
And people need to mind abusiness and do the work on
themselves and if they did that,they wouldn't have room to
judge anybody else and whatthey're doing, you know.
I think we need to get to thatplace of doing the work and what
either?
(18:05):
Just being quiet about otherpeople's relationships you know
it's their relationship and somany people bashing her about
the book and things like thatand just it's just terrible.
It's not just them, it's.
I see this all the time.
If anybody's in a relationship,they rock with them at first,
(18:26):
as soon as they get in arelationship or as soon as they
do something that you don'tagree with, and that's another
thing.
We can agree to disagree.
We don't have to hate theperson or just talk about them
because they don't measure up towhat we thought or they don't
(18:46):
agree with us and so forth, likenow.
People are canceling people forjust speaking their truth and
just living their lives.
You know.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
All right, I just believe it all starts.
It all goes back to self.
If you love yourself and yourespect yourself, then you'll
respect others, yeah if you'remiserable on the inside and you
hate it on the inside and you'reinsecure, and then you take it
out on other people.
Then that's why this world isso corrupt and just angry.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Everybody's mad.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
everybody's angry but it's misguided, as our episode
before Mm-hmm we spoke about andit's not, and you're taking it
out on the wrong people, likelike you said I really believe
that people are just speakingout to help Not to harm, but to
help.
They're just and it's justtheir, their lives and what
they've been through, andthey're willing to open up and
share that, and that takescourage and especially, like you
(19:40):
said, with celebrities and justpeople in general and
somebody's willing to open upand share something.
Don't tear them up.
If you don't like what they say, then just turn it off, don't
listen or, again, social mediastroll past it.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Yeah, everything for everyone, everybody's different,
different folks, differentstrokes.
Speaker 2 (19:57):
So just let people be free, let people live, just
live, lack and love.
This world will just bebeautiful of Beautiful souls and
beautiful people, just justlove.
This is all about.
It all comes down to love andif you love yourself, bottom
line, you won't want to tearanybody else down and self care
is worth it.
(20:17):
Take the time to love you, loveyourself and that and again it
goes back to so you're gonna bein a relationship with somebody.
You got to love yourself andthis is me speaking, my
experience Trying to love otherpeople and and heal them when
I'm not even healed myself.
So I'm speaking for myself.
I'm not telling everybody elsewhat to do, but I'm just saying
(20:38):
you got to love yourself.
You got to be Encourageyourself and be happy with the
end, so you can spread love andnot tear it down.
And and you also got to loveyourself in order to be able to
receive love from someone else.
Show people how to love you.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
You got to teach people how to treat you if you
don't love you, if you don'tknow you, how do you love you?
You know?
you know a lot of people don'teven know who they are.
So and I and we're speakingfrom experience, definitely
speaking from experience thatI've tried it different ways.
You know, I tried Marriages andI try to be single and you know
(21:21):
what was best for me and soforth, but it's all what I've
learned is that it's how I heal,treat myself.
Go within, unpack those thingsso that I'm able to love someone
the way God intended us to lovesomeone.
You know, and it'sunconditional love.
(21:41):
Unconditional means that no,like how we love our children,
you know, or Probably love ourparents.
You know people that, of course, have healthy relationships
with their children and parents.
But when you that's anunconditional love, my children
get on my nerves and I'll talk,john, but at the end of the day
I'm a ride or die.
For you know I'm saying like,don't play with my kids.
(22:04):
You know People with a mama,they don't play with my mama.
You know I'm saying we have ourups and downs.
I can talk about it, but youcan't say nothing about our type
of thing.
You know what I mean.
So, but it's supposed to beunconditional love.
You're gonna love them throughit all and at the end of the day
it's worth it.
And if you can't, then it's okayto walk away and say you know
what?
We had a good ride and now youknow it's time to go.
(22:29):
You know you need to heal.
I need to heal, you know, andtake care of me.
Do some self-care, self-loveand and wish them well.
You know it shouldn't be anyanger and all of that.
Now I know we're human nowtimes, especially like when we
first get divorced or separatedusually you know it's a mixed
emotions and all of that.
But If you really love theperson, you'll come back to love
(22:54):
, whether it's a year down aline, two years or whatever.
How many years?
And especially if you havechildren together you have to be
a good person.
Together you have to be able tobe adults about things and
handle things in a morehealthier, appropriate way.
And Because you, because you're, teaching those kids.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
What they see, you do , and you know if you're talking
about the dad or the mom.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
Are you?
Speaker 2 (23:18):
keeping them away from the dad or the mom, you're
hurting a child.
Think about the child, put themfirst, especially Marriage with
children.
People just food for thought.
Speaker 1 (23:29):
You know I'm saying yeah, cuz you said an example.
Speaker 2 (23:32):
Let them be the judges.
They grow older, They'll seewhether that parent really loved
him or kid or not.
They'll see actress me yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:41):
I used to Not because you all would.
I used to and I think I sharedthis with you, with my son's
father I would buy Christmasgifts if, even if they didn't
get a Christmas gift or if theydidn't send a birthday card or,
and you know, a birthday gift, Iwould go ahead and purchase it
(24:03):
myself and I will put from youknow their dad and the reason
why I did it.
It wasn't for the dads and cuzpeople thought I was crazy.
It was like girl I'm when, youknow.
But I did it for my childrenbecause I never wanted them to
feel like they weren't loved bytheir fathers or, you know, they
didn't think enough of them toto get them something for
(24:25):
Christmas or birthdays.
You know what I mean and Do.
Did I always, you know, like weyou know my exes we had some
issues, but when it came to ourchildren, we always were cordial
and Try to.
You know you put on the face,sometimes you put on the mask,
(24:50):
but, um, I just thought it wasimportant.
I never wanted my kids to feellike they weren't loved by their
parent.
So it's sometimes we just dothings for our children to make
it easy and better for them andas they got older, you know,
they need to talk about theirdad's, like they were gold honey
, like they were the best thingpopping and I knew different.
(25:14):
But I was gonna let them justsee.
You know, I'm saying when theygot older, you know, and they
saw for themselves, I didn'teven have to go into a whole
spill of what you know.
The daddy ain't this, ain't thatDa-da-da-da-da-da-da-da, they
figured it out.
Did it irk my nerves sometimes?
Would they put them on a highpedestal?
Yes, but I didn't want to takethat away from them.
(25:37):
They're joy, you know, and Ithink that a lot of people
should, like you said, justthink about your children and
especially when children areinvolved, we need to just not
beat up people and talk aboutbecause you're talking about
somebody's parents, like they'retalking about William and Jada,
but at the same time that'sstill Jada and parents
(26:01):
Appearance Willow's parentsexactly when they see those
comments.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
They see it and tearing their mother down under
the father like man I just love.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
And they just sharing their story to be able to help
people the same way we are.
That's why a long time I didn'twant to write my book or finish
it or even get on here to talkto people about my truth,
because I felt like I would bejudged.
But at the end of the day, Idon't care anymore what people
think.
(26:29):
This was my journey, this iswhat I went through, and if we
could help one person and thisis why you're on here as well we
could help one person to changetheir lives for the better and
let them know they're not alone,and any encouragement that we
give that if it changessomeone's life, then that's fine
.
But at the end of the day, weneed to get better with our
(26:53):
words, because the power of thetongue is life or death that we
speak and we have to be carefuland mindful of what we say at
our mouths.
You know.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Absolutely, absolutely.
Like I said, everybody's justgot to let each one live.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
Exactly.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
Everybody's love language is different.
Everybody deserves a chance tolove and be who they are without
being tore down and at the endof the day, like you said, I'm
just saying we don't care whatnobody thinks about me as long
as I'm doing what God put in myheart to do.
If God is for me, who could beagainst me?
Here be a point blank.
(27:36):
If people are going to judgeyou, no matter what you do,
whether you do everything forthem.
You could give them a milliondollars, and then they'll still
talk.
Speaker 1 (27:44):
They'll say a million five Exactly you know what I'm
saying?
Speaker 2 (27:47):
It's never enough.
So you know, and even, like yousaid, with celebrities, they
cook, they cook them up, theycook, they brush them up, yep.
And then they tear them down assoon as what they don't like.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
And these people paved the way for us.
You know, like theopportunities that we didn't
have now we do have in acting,production, sports, all kinds of
you know, and you're cancelingthem.
Like we need to respect people.
I think that's the biggestthing is having respect for
(28:23):
someone else.
And because a lot of peoplewere saying I don't respect her
and this, and that I respectanyone that's going to be honest
and authentic and genuine andspeak their truths to, because
that's not easy.
It's not easy telling yourstories.
It's not easy telling the bad,you know it's easy to tell the
(28:44):
good, you know.
Oh, look at us, we're doinggreat, you know, and behind
closed doors you're miserable.
You're fighting, you fuss andcussing, acting crazy, and in
front of the children too.
And so I respect her to haveenough courage to not only about
the whole slap, you know, afterthat instance, then now you
(29:07):
know she's coming out with herbook and sharing more, like it's
not stopping her, she's likeyou know, this is my story.
You know I didn't go throughthis, you know, in vain.
So I have a story to tell andI'm going to tell it, and I
think more people need to sharetheir stories and their
testimonies of what God hasbrought them through, to give
other people hope as well to getthrough this journey, because
(29:29):
this is tough.
You know Life is.
It's not easy, but it'sdefinitely worth it if you
continue to fight and youcontinue to go through.
You know, whatever God bringyou to, he's gonna bring you
through amen.
Anything else you want to saybefore we Sign off?
(29:50):
Just Everybody.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
Just again back to the point.
Just love.
God is love, be love, give loveand Love yourself, love
yourself, take time for yourself, get to know you, because you
can't love nobody else.
If you don't love you, youshouldn't be judging anybody
else.
Speaker 1 (30:08):
I mean it's not our job to judge.
Speaker 2 (30:10):
It's our job to live, motivate and educate period.
We got to be careful.
Speaker 1 (30:16):
Judging people and saying never.
Remember we said that beforeabout when you say never God
will put you in a very positionor a situation that you said oh,
I would never be a stripper, Iwould never date women, or I
would never date, you know, Iwould never do that with my kids
, and so forth.
You just never know whatposition you're in until you're
in it and and that's why I'llnever say never, no more,
(30:39):
because God has always put me ina position oh, you think you're
better than them.
You know I'm saying, oh, youthink that you're better than
that.
That couldn't happen to you.
And then you find yourself init.
You're like oh, wow, and yousee things differently when
you're in those shoes, you knowso, um, yeah, just give people
(31:00):
grace, guys.
We love you guys so much and wejust thank you.
I know the journey is difficultand I know things change every
day, but my advice is to not goagainst the grain, to just flow,
you know, with the water, likethe river, just flow with it,
don't, you know, becauseotherwise it's gonna take you a
(31:23):
lifetime to get it right if youstart just kind of going with
the flow Of what God is tryingto show you and I know it's
uncomfortable because changenobody likes change, but at the
end of the day is definitelygonna be worth it.
Just, you know love.
And another thing stop gettingmarried for for other purposes
(31:45):
other than love.
You know, not for money, notbecause she got a fat booty, or
because you know he's got this,he's got that, he's got a house,
you know, and all of that, thematerial stuff, you know,
because that's not what it's allabout in the first place.
Really, marriage is supposed tobe about being in love, loving
(32:09):
someone enough to Go throughanything with them.
You know so Absolutely live,love, laugh.
Yeah, thank you everybody forlistening.
Speaker 2 (32:23):
And say bless, be blessed.
Bread, love and not hate.
Speaker 1 (32:27):
Yes, thank you for that, everyone, have a blessed
one.
We will see you next Monday andContinue to share and download.
If you have any questions or ifyou have anything we want to.
You want us to even read, ifyou want to Write in to free
concepts podcast at gmailcom.
(32:47):
Everyone, have a wonderful week.
Talk to you soon.
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