September 17, 2025 • 30 mins
Have you ever stopped to question why you keep consuming things that don't truly make you happy? That third cup of coffee, the closet full of unworn clothes, the endless scrolling on social media—what if these behaviors are part of a larger matrix programming designed to keep us addicted, distracted, and disconnected from our authentic purpose?
In this deeply personal episode, I share a powerful revelation that came to me during an early morning dog walk. As darkness gave way to dawn, I witnessed how my aging husky was startled by something he couldn't see until it was right in front of him—a perfect metaphor for humanity's current awakening. We're collectively experiencing the uncomfortable jolt of seeing what's been hidden in plain sight: our unhealthy relationship with consumption.
America has become a nation of consumers rather than contributors. We eat, shop, scroll, and accumulate possessions at unprecedented rates, yet statistics show we're more unhealthy, indebted, and disconnected than ever before. I candidly share my own battles with emotional eating, coffee addiction, and the false belief that material upgrades would fix my unhappiness. The turning point came when I left my home with just six boxes of possessions and discovered a surprising sense of freedom and joy in having less.
This isn't about rejecting all material comforts—it's about mindful consumption versus mindless addiction. Are your consumption habits sustainable? Are they bringing genuine fulfillment? Are they allowing you to contribute meaningfully to your family and community? When we redefine our relationship with "stuff," we can redirect our natural tendencies toward positive contribution rather than endless consumption.
Ready to break free from the matrix of consumption? Join me on this transformative journey and discover how walking away from what doesn't serve you creates space for authentic living. What small step will you take today to shift from consumption to contribution? Your health, relationships, and true purpose are waiting.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
These boots are made for walking and that's just what
they'll do.
I hope your boots will walkaway on this Walk Away Wednesday
too.
Yeah, welcome.
Welcome back to Free to Just Be, the podcast empowering
humanity to courageously stepout of old patterns and matrix
(00:25):
programming and give a big oldhug to new ways of being.
And I hope this finds you inthe greatest of health, with
vibrant energy today, becauseyou have chosen to accept full
responsibility for your body,mind and soul.
Responsibility for your body,mind and soul here on Free to
Just Be, your host that'll be me.
(00:48):
Teresa Marie.
The ambassador of Chi willinspire you to truly be who you
came here to be Authentic, freeand align with your highest
potential.
So won't you join me on thistransformative journey to
rewrite our narratives and livelives of purpose and passion?
(01:10):
And right out the gates, I wantto say that if this podcast is
beginning to resonate with youor maybe even agitate you, can
you smash the like button andcan you share it with somebody
so that we can get the algorithmgoing a little bit better, so
(01:31):
that more people can be helpedto get out of the matrix
programs.
Okay, all right.
Well, before I get into thetopic that I want to talk about
today, what I have been feelingfor a long time now that I need
to walk away from personally,and it's much, much broader than
(01:51):
just little old Teresa Marie.
It's really something that theworld, but most especially the
Western world of America, needsto walk away, and we're going to
hit that here in a moment.
But you know, this is a verydaunting time to be alive, is it
(02:11):
not?
And I got a really really goodphysical picture this morning at
about 10 minutes to five thismorning, as I got up finally,
after not sleeping very wellsince about two in the morning,
and I got up at three and cameinto my office and began my
(02:37):
Siddhana and my devotions, andby about 10 minutes to five I
was ready to get out and walkthe dogs.
But autumn's coming and it waspretty dark out, and so I took
my two snow dogs I, of course,if you don't know, I have a
(02:57):
Husky and a Malamute, so they'remy snow dogs and I hooked
Sniper and Liberty up and webegan walking down the road.
Now I want to give a littlebackstory.
Our dogs are going into theirgeriatric years.
(03:18):
We don't know.
They're both rescues, so wedon't really know their actual
ages and we're assuming thatthey're about, say, somewhere
between nine and 13 years.
Okay, and Liberty, my Malamute.
We've already recognized that.
(03:39):
She's pretty well deaf andshe's kind of quirky as well.
But what I noticed today aboutSniper was that I think that his
eyesight is what's going, andthe reason I'm bringing this all
up is because I got this reallyvivid, you know, in real time
(04:01):
picture of what I believe we'regoing through on this ascension
journey.
It truly is a spiritual battleto become more Christ-like.
That's the last thing darknesswants is for us to go back to
God.
And I'm walking down the streetand I'm loving it.
(04:24):
You know it's quiet, stars arestill out, you know the air had
that morning dew in it and youknow Liv is just.
She's trucking down the roadbecause she can't hear a dang
thing.
Right and out of the corner ofmy eye, I see my neighbor Cory's
two dogs.
Now he has two dogs that are inteenage years, one is a German
(04:48):
Shepherd and one is a Rottweiler.
And so these are, these aregoing to be, you know,
formidable beast as they getolder.
They're both a very large breedand they can be very
intimidating.
Looking right.
And I remember, when I firstreturned back home, I didn't
(05:10):
realize that Cory had gottenthese two new dogs and man, my
husband and I were walking byhis house and these dogs came
running out and it kind of itstartled me.
Well, because it was so darkthis morning, you know, and I
have Sniper on my right, whichis the side of my neighbors, and
I have Lib on the other side,and I could see the shadows of
(05:35):
the dog coming down from theirfront porch down toward the road
, but Sniper didn't see it.
He didn't see it until that dogwas probably six feet from him
and began to bark ferociously oh, their barks are like really
scary and I watched Sniperliterally jump and as I told the
(05:59):
dogs, you know, good morning,you know, go lay down.
You know it's all right andthey headed back up to their
house and we continued down thepath.
It just hit me like a rhema.
You know, rhema is like thisvery rapid illumination of your
spirit and, you know, if you'reaware and awake you can catch
(06:21):
these rhemas.
And there are a lot of lifelessons in Ramas.
And so, as I walked up the hill,I was thinking, wow, this is
what we're doing here on planetEarth, because planet Earth for
a long, long time, for manycenturies, has been covered over
with darkness and the light hasbeen, you know, trying to rise
(06:42):
up and trying to rise up, andnow we're in what I believe is
literally the Armageddon of ourtime, and the light is just
flooding the planet and that hasgot the darkness.
Just like those dogs, they areferocious right now and they are
(07:04):
throwing everything they can atthe light to shut it down.
They have to shut it downbecause, if enough light shows
up on the planet, guess what?
All of their dark hemiestetes,all of them are going to be
exposed.
And that's what we as apopulation of humans are
(07:27):
witnessing right now, to thepoint where we literally
witnessed, in cold blood, thekilling of somebody.
Because pretty much, theyprofess to love God, and loving
God means that maybe you don'tagree with some of these things
(07:49):
that are kind of dark, andthat's why he got killed.
So we literally, like it or not, like the person or not, like
the message or not, we all, ashuman beings, witness the
darkness at its worst.
And what's even worse than that, we watched people replay it
(08:12):
over and over and over again,and it is going to prove my
point today of what the matrixhas done to us and what we can
do to help ourselves walkfurther away from the matrix
programming.
And Jacob Held said it very well.
(08:35):
He said one can best describe aculture of Thank you, jacob.
And we can really make a caseabout this in America.
(09:07):
We are the biggest consumers ofthe world, we are the richest
country in the world and we arethe unhealthiest.
We are covered up with theaddiction of consuming, consume,
consume, consume.
And the reason that this is soclose to me is that just
(09:32):
recently, in the last month, Ihave really been acutely aware
and very, very, very consciousof what I have been continually
putting in my mouth, my mouth.
(09:55):
Now, I don't know if I didn'thave physical needs met or
whatever, but I am in the hugegroup in America called the
emotional eaters.
And what has this matrix taughtus to do?
Oh, if you have any kind ofemotional issue, we're going to
take care of it.
We're going to eat, we're goingto drink, we're going to
medicate, we're going to zoneout, we're going to sit in front
(10:20):
of Netflix, we are going toconsume.
And actually it's been longerthan months, it's been a couple
of years.
I remember when Tom McDonaldcame out with oh, I can't
remember the title of the song,but the chorus was I'm a
believer, I believe, right, andah, a fighter, that was the name
(10:44):
of the song a fighter, andthat's what we are.
We're in a huge fight right nowand I know I'm rabbit trailing,
but this will all come fullcircle here in a moment.
And when I heard that song, Iplayed it over and over again
I'm a believer, I believe.
And then one day, and yesterday, I confessed to my coffee
(11:05):
addiction.
And I have been an addict mywhole life.
And an addict doesn'tnecessarily mean crack or heroin
.
You can be addicted to anything.
And here in the Western worldthe addictions are off the chain
, okay, they are everywhere.
(11:27):
And one day I was on my third orfourth cup of coffee and I
literally was feeling horrible.
And as I'm pouring the coffee,I said to myself wow, I feel
horrible.
Why am I drinking this again?
And I just said because ittastes good.
(11:48):
Because it tastes good.
And immediately, as that thoughtleft my head, I suddenly heard,
to the tune of Tom McDonald'sI'm a Believer song I'm a
consumer, I consume.
I'm a consumer, I consume.
Oh, it was like a dagger goinginto my heart Now, as I shared
(12:10):
with you in a couple of episodesthis week.
It's a dance Progress isprogress, but sometimes it
literally is inch by inch andthen everything becomes a cinch.
But sometimes we don't get itright away, because you know
it's been a year or more sincethen way, because you know it's
(12:34):
been a year or more since then,and I have to tell you that when
I left my marital home 22months ago, I entered into one
of my biggest food and drinkaddiction periods, since I
weighed 240 pounds.
Oh yes, I am still right nowtoday sitting on 20 extra pounds
(12:55):
, and the medical world wouldconsider me obese.
Now look around you, especiallypeople who live in America.
There are people that aremorbidly obese, and people who
are in shape and have thecorrect amount of body fat on
(13:29):
their body are now the minorityin America.
I can show you pictures.
I was 238 pounds and I waspushing a size 28.
And then I woke up some 18years ago and I finally I lost
with the help of oh, I can'tremember the name of it now the
(13:54):
weightlifting one.
I lost 98 pounds and I still amcarrying 20 pounds on my body.
So I am very familiar with theconsumption of food, with the
consumption of alcohol, with theconsumption of nicotine,
cannabis, speed, speed balls,cocaine.
(14:15):
I am very, very well versedabout addictions, and that might
not be your thing, butconsumerism in our country is
just as addictive.
The level of consumption thatwe identify with as success is
(14:36):
utterly unsustainable.
What does John Robinson say weare doing?
We are gobbling up the world.
And what does the Word of Godsay?
That we are of the world.
We live in the world, but we'renot of the world.
What does the Tao Te Ching sayabout it?
(14:56):
That we are to observe what theworld does and do the opposite.
And yet, what is your addiction?
Humanityville?
Is it your phone?
Oh guilty.
Is it scrolling throughFacebook?
Oh, some days, I'm guilty.
Is it watching marathons on TV?
(15:20):
I used to be guilty of thatyears and years ago.
Is it buying things that youdon't need?
How many of us have so manyclothes in our possession that
we literally don't ever wear allof them?
How many of us have so muchfurniture in our house that we
(15:42):
can barely walk?
How many of us have garages sojam-packed that we can't park
our car?
How many of us have multiplevehicles when there's only one
of us.
I mean, it's not to say thatyou can't have things, but I
(16:02):
want you to look at the designof the matrix towards
consumption.
We are a culture of consumerism,and what does unbridled
consumption bring to the matrix?
It brings inebriation.
It brings ego.
(16:24):
It brings addatisfied people.
It brings the need for more,more, more it.
It it's uh, it reminds me ofthe book that I I've read to all
of my kids and and many of mygrandkids um called give me
(16:46):
hands.
That is what the matrix wantedfor us.
Reach out, reach out, reach outand not, you know, reach out
with love.
No, reach out for more stuff.
Reach out for stuff that'sgoing to make you feel better,
even though it really doesn't.
It makes us sicker and itreally is a form of greed.
(17:09):
It really is a form of greed.
And what is greed?
It's the assumption that it isall for my consumption.
Think about the people thatrise in financial status and
they receive the status quo andthey have all the bells and
whistles that they can imagine.
They can travel anywhere, theycan get whatever kind of health
(17:33):
care they want that nobody elsecan afford.
They have every clothing andjewelry and makeup and
procedures done and they are themost miserable people on the
planet.
Very oftentimes, veryoftentimes, elise Boulder said,
(17:56):
the consumption society has madeus feel that happiness lies in
having things and has failed toteach us the happiness of not
having things.
I'll give you a real-timeexample in my own life.
I've never really been amaterial girl.
I've always had the conceptthat if I'm bringing something
in the house, then something hasto go to goodwill.
(18:18):
That's how I've always lived mylife.
Now, part of it is the scarcitymentality, and that's a whole
nother topic.
But I've not been a trendsetteror no, I shouldn't say that
I've never gone with the trends.
So I'm pretty much the oppositeof that.
(18:38):
I'm the one that wants to notwear makeup and not dye my hair,
and I would prefer to not weara bra and not do what the world
is doing and not do what theworld is doing.
But this whole consumptionprogram was a big well, not a
(18:59):
big part, but part of it.
Toward the end of my days,before I left my home and my
marriage for a season, I wasthinking about how, you know, my
husband just wants to stay inmediocrity.
He doesn't want to rise aboveand he wants to stay in this
house.
That needs repair and you knowwe need to do something about
(19:23):
the hair and the dogs, and onand on and on.
And, interestingly enough, whenI left, I left.
I've talked about this umnauseam, um in prior episodes,
about how I left in my hippieHonda with you know, when I left
(19:46):
this home, I had probably eightor nine boxes, and when I left
for Florida, I reduced that downto probably six that fit in my
little Honda Civic in thehatchback.
I only had a two-door car andthat was what my life was
reduced to.
And I have to tell you that myhappiness quotient really,
(20:06):
really increased.
In regards to physical life,life was so much easier.
I didn't have pets to deal with, I didn't have housework to
deal with, it was just me,myself and I and my six boxes of
possessions.
And when I moved in with mydear roommate Pam, my landlord
(20:27):
Pam, we were sharing herbeautiful home.
It was her home.
I didn't have to worry aboutthe vacuuming, the dusting of
anything but the rooms that Iwas using, and it was a
completely freeing andliberating experience for me
Because, you see, I left and Iwas doing all the dog chores,
(20:51):
all the cooking, all thecleaning, working outside, all
of that stuff that many womenare barking back at because
their self is saying you know, Idon't want to be the only one
doing this, right?
But now let me fast forward youto when I returned.
All of a sudden, none of thatphysical baloney mattered.
(21:15):
I was so happy to be back in ahome with my husband who, by the
way, we always loved each other.
We just I personally didn'tlike him for a long time.
He had a lot of narcissistictendency and I was tired of
being controlled.
And all of that and our timeapart absolutely radically
(21:40):
changed both of us and I camehome and everything was familiar
and it was my home.
It wasn't Pam's home.
The stuff in the house was allfunctional and aesthetics really
don't matter to me anymore.
What's more important to me nowin this stage of life, in this
(22:03):
chapter of my life, is how can Icontribute to my family of
humanity, how can I contributeto my children and my
grandchildren?
And that's a whole nother topic.
And I realized, wow, I reallygot caught in that consumer trap
, didn't I?
And that is what the matrixdoes.
(22:25):
It teaches us that without allof this stuff that, by the way,
we have to work two jobs toobtain it and then we have to
maintain it.
So all of our time is spentmaintaining and earning and
spending and we don't ever havea chance to just be or to just
(22:49):
enjoy the toys that we bought,right?
Chris Lash said the model ofownership in a society organized
around mass consumption, whatis the model of ownership?
Addiction?
And that is what massconsumption has done to us.
We might not be addicted to allthe substance abuses that I
(23:10):
listed earlier.
It may be food.
It may be literally theconsumerism of buying things.
It may be a pantry that is sofull that you could go through
the apocalypse three times.
Maybe it's.
You cannot let go of anythingand you've become a hoarder
because you feel like you neverknow when you're going to need
(23:33):
it.
That's all consumerism.
And what does?
Mindless consumption alwaysturn into Excessive consumption
and thus the addict.
And you know, the focus ofrecent days has been about
getting rid of the violence insociety.
We need to get stop theviolence.
(23:54):
Stop the violence.
Let's look at the definition ofviolence for a minute, folks.
It's the intentional use ofphysical force or power to cause
harm, injury, death orpsychological harm To who To
oneself, another person or acommunity.
(24:16):
So let's back completely awayfrom the matrix programming
concept for a second and look atthe violence we are doing to
ourselves.
That's what I had to look at,man, oh man.
It really began in Floridabecause, you know, I was away
from everything that I thoughtwas my issue, and it was me and
(24:38):
God and nobody else.
And I was still doing violenceto myself with the way I was
eating, the choices I was makingwith my time, the choices I was
making with my lack thereof ofcontribution.
It was violent.
And I had to recognize oh mygosh, do I hate myself that much
(25:03):
that after all these years, I'mstill abusing myself with food?
I'm still abusing myself withexcess.
Everything is an excess with me.
Anything I do, it seems like Iwould do it excessively.
And then one day after I washome for about a month, I
(25:25):
thought, wow, okay, so if I aman eight on the Enneagram and my
downside is excessiveness,couldn't I turn that
excessiveness on to good things?
So that is exactly what I'mdoing.
I'm moving away from consumingso much and I'm being extremely
(25:49):
mindful, not mindless.
Everything that I pick up,certainly, everything I put near
my mouth everything I choose todo.
I am now being mindful about myconsumption and my excessive
tendencies.
So now I'm very proud of myselfthat I can tell you that it
(26:13):
literally now has been sevenwhole days coffee free.
Now I'm still drinking a verylow level of matcha or green tea
, but everything has shifted.
My body that has been so usedto junk and processed food and
(26:35):
massive sugar.
And I'm not going to lie, whenI was in Florida I lived largely
on takeout food, which ishorrible poison for your body.
So to back all that up and tosay if I want to walk this path
of darkness and see the lightcome down and illuminate
(26:58):
everything and enter us into thegolden age, and if I want to
leave the planet better for mygrandchildren than I left it for
my children because my childrenare struggling through this
matrix now too and what did I do?
But I contributed to the matrixfor much of their life so if I
(27:19):
want to be around to do thosethings, then the first thing
that I need to gain back is myhealth running like a well-oiled
machine, and I know how to dothat.
I mean, I lost 98 pounds andkept it off.
I know the things that I haveto do, oh, but the
self-discipline thereof.
And there comes that excessivepersonality of mine.
(27:44):
So turn your excessiveaddictions, your consuming of
things that you don't need, turnit around.
Turn it around.
What does Deb Midra say?
She says that life is not forconsumption but for contribution
(28:05):
.
You see, I don't want to juststay at home and eat my way back
to bad health.
No, I want to be a well-oiledmachine, contributing back to
society, contributing back tothe battle of getting humanity
off the matrix merry-ground.
(28:26):
So I just ask you today, whereare you at on a walkaway
Wednesday, with being a memberof the American Consumption
Society?
Are you doing violence to yourown self?
Are you doing violence toanother person in your family
because your time is consumedwith consumption?
(28:48):
It's consumed with earningenough so that you can buy the
next doodad.
Are you doing harm to yourcommunity by not entering into
any kind of community activities?
Oh, I'm pointing those fingersback to me here.
Humanity, I'm keeping it real.
Keeping it real.
I don't want greed to be theassumption for all of my
(29:12):
consumption.
Oh, I have to get this.
I have to get this.
You know, I'm not going to behappy unless X Y Z and I need to
earn this amount of money inorder for me to do X Y Z.
I don't, I don't want to bethere.
How about you Now?
That's not to say that we can'tbe comfortable and that we
can't consume things, no, butwhen things become out of hand
(29:35):
and it keeps us from gettingback to our true selves, it may
be time to walk away from it.
So, on a walk away Wednesday, Ijust want to ask, with the John
Robbins quote is your level ofconsumption that you identify
with as success sustainable?
(29:57):
Are you into debt up to youreyeballs?
Is it wrecking your health?
Is it wrecking yourrelationships?
Do you have time for nothingbut work?
Are you gobbling up the worldor are you making an impact on
the world for the light?
I love you, humanity, and I askthat you use these words today
(30:23):
to illuminate your own life andask yourself the hard questions
Are there things in my life thatI need to walk away from and
then choose?
Are there things in my lifethat I need to walk away from
and then choose?
Choose today, even if it's justa small iota of a big elephant
(30:45):
that you have to walk away from,the way we walk away from
things often is not to sayanything about overeating, but
it's often one bite at a time.
I love you, humanity.
Have a wonder-filled Wednesday.
These boots are made for walking and that's just what
they'll do.
I hope your boots will walkaway on this Walk Away Wednesday
too.
Yeah, welcome.
Welcome back to Free to Just Be, the podcast empowering
humanity to courageously stepout of old patterns and matrix
(00:25):
programming and give a big oldhug to new ways of being.
And I hope this finds you inthe greatest of health, with
vibrant energy today, becauseyou have chosen to accept full
responsibility for your body,mind and soul.
Responsibility for your body,mind and soul here on Free to
Just Be, your host that'll be me.
(00:48):
Teresa Marie.
The ambassador of Chi willinspire you to truly be who you
came here to be Authentic, freeand align with your highest
potential.
So won't you join me on thistransformative journey to
rewrite our narratives and livelives of purpose and passion?
(01:10):
And right out the gates, I wantto say that if this podcast is
beginning to resonate with youor maybe even agitate you, can
you smash the like button andcan you share it with somebody
so that we can get the algorithmgoing a little bit better, so
(01:31):
that more people can be helpedto get out of the matrix
programs.
Okay, all right.
Well, before I get into thetopic that I want to talk about
today, what I have been feelingfor a long time now that I need
to walk away from personally,and it's much, much broader than
(01:51):
just little old Teresa Marie.
It's really something that theworld, but most especially the
Western world of America, needsto walk away, and we're going to
hit that here in a moment.
But you know, this is a verydaunting time to be alive, is it
(02:11):
not?
And I got a really really goodphysical picture this morning at
about 10 minutes to five thismorning, as I got up finally,
after not sleeping very wellsince about two in the morning,
and I got up at three and cameinto my office and began my
(02:37):
Siddhana and my devotions, andby about 10 minutes to five I
was ready to get out and walkthe dogs.
But autumn's coming and it waspretty dark out, and so I took
my two snow dogs I, of course,if you don't know, I have a
(02:57):
Husky and a Malamute, so they'remy snow dogs and I hooked
Sniper and Liberty up and webegan walking down the road.
Now I want to give a littlebackstory.
Our dogs are going into theirgeriatric years.
(03:18):
We don't know.
They're both rescues, so wedon't really know their actual
ages and we're assuming thatthey're about, say, somewhere
between nine and 13 years.
Okay, and Liberty, my Malamute.
We've already recognized that.
(03:39):
She's pretty well deaf andshe's kind of quirky as well.
But what I noticed today aboutSniper was that I think that his
eyesight is what's going, andthe reason I'm bringing this all
up is because I got this reallyvivid, you know, in real time
(04:01):
picture of what I believe we'regoing through on this ascension
journey.
It truly is a spiritual battleto become more Christ-like.
That's the last thing darknesswants is for us to go back to
God.
And I'm walking down the streetand I'm loving it.
(04:24):
You know it's quiet, stars arestill out, you know the air had
that morning dew in it and youknow Liv is just.
She's trucking down the roadbecause she can't hear a dang
thing.
Right and out of the corner ofmy eye, I see my neighbor Cory's
two dogs.
Now he has two dogs that are inteenage years, one is a German
(04:48):
Shepherd and one is a Rottweiler.
And so these are, these aregoing to be, you know,
formidable beast as they getolder.
They're both a very large breedand they can be very
intimidating.
Looking right.
And I remember, when I firstreturned back home, I didn't
(05:10):
realize that Cory had gottenthese two new dogs and man, my
husband and I were walking byhis house and these dogs came
running out and it kind of itstartled me.
Well, because it was so darkthis morning, you know, and I
have Sniper on my right, whichis the side of my neighbors, and
I have Lib on the other side,and I could see the shadows of
(05:35):
the dog coming down from theirfront porch down toward the road
, but Sniper didn't see it.
He didn't see it until that dogwas probably six feet from him
and began to bark ferociously oh, their barks are like really
scary and I watched Sniperliterally jump and as I told the
(05:59):
dogs, you know, good morning,you know, go lay down.
You know it's all right andthey headed back up to their
house and we continued down thepath.
It just hit me like a rhema.
You know, rhema is like thisvery rapid illumination of your
spirit and, you know, if you'reaware and awake you can catch
(06:21):
these rhemas.
And there are a lot of lifelessons in Ramas.
And so, as I walked up the hill,I was thinking, wow, this is
what we're doing here on planetEarth, because planet Earth for
a long, long time, for manycenturies, has been covered over
with darkness and the light hasbeen, you know, trying to rise
(06:42):
up and trying to rise up, andnow we're in what I believe is
literally the Armageddon of ourtime, and the light is just
flooding the planet and that hasgot the darkness.
Just like those dogs, they areferocious right now and they are
(07:04):
throwing everything they can atthe light to shut it down.
They have to shut it downbecause, if enough light shows
up on the planet, guess what?
All of their dark hemiestetes,all of them are going to be
exposed.
And that's what we as apopulation of humans are
(07:27):
witnessing right now, to thepoint where we literally
witnessed, in cold blood, thekilling of somebody.
Because pretty much, theyprofess to love God, and loving
God means that maybe you don'tagree with some of these things
(07:49):
that are kind of dark, andthat's why he got killed.
So we literally, like it or not, like the person or not, like
the message or not, we all, ashuman beings, witness the
darkness at its worst.
And what's even worse than that, we watched people replay it
(08:12):
over and over and over again,and it is going to prove my
point today of what the matrixhas done to us and what we can
do to help ourselves walkfurther away from the matrix
programming.
And Jacob Held said it very well.
(08:35):
He said one can best describe aculture of Thank you, jacob.
And we can really make a caseabout this in America.
(09:07):
We are the biggest consumers ofthe world, we are the richest
country in the world and we arethe unhealthiest.
We are covered up with theaddiction of consuming, consume,
consume, consume.
And the reason that this is soclose to me is that just
(09:32):
recently, in the last month, Ihave really been acutely aware
and very, very, very consciousof what I have been continually
putting in my mouth, my mouth.
(09:55):
Now, I don't know if I didn'thave physical needs met or
whatever, but I am in the hugegroup in America called the
emotional eaters.
And what has this matrix taughtus to do?
Oh, if you have any kind ofemotional issue, we're going to
take care of it.
We're going to eat, we're goingto drink, we're going to
medicate, we're going to zoneout, we're going to sit in front
(10:20):
of Netflix, we are going toconsume.
And actually it's been longerthan months, it's been a couple
of years.
I remember when Tom McDonaldcame out with oh, I can't
remember the title of the song,but the chorus was I'm a
believer, I believe, right, andah, a fighter, that was the name
(10:44):
of the song a fighter, andthat's what we are.
We're in a huge fight right nowand I know I'm rabbit trailing,
but this will all come fullcircle here in a moment.
And when I heard that song, Iplayed it over and over again
I'm a believer, I believe.
And then one day, and yesterday, I confessed to my coffee
(11:05):
addiction.
And I have been an addict mywhole life.
And an addict doesn'tnecessarily mean crack or heroin
.
You can be addicted to anything.
And here in the Western worldthe addictions are off the chain
, okay, they are everywhere.
(11:27):
And one day I was on my third orfourth cup of coffee and I
literally was feeling horrible.
And as I'm pouring the coffee,I said to myself wow, I feel
horrible.
Why am I drinking this again?
And I just said because ittastes good.
(11:48):
Because it tastes good.
And immediately, as that thoughtleft my head, I suddenly heard,
to the tune of Tom McDonald'sI'm a Believer song I'm a
consumer, I consume.
I'm a consumer, I consume.
Oh, it was like a dagger goinginto my heart Now, as I shared
(12:10):
with you in a couple of episodesthis week.
It's a dance Progress isprogress, but sometimes it
literally is inch by inch andthen everything becomes a cinch.
But sometimes we don't get itright away, because you know
it's been a year or more sincethen way, because you know it's
(12:34):
been a year or more since then,and I have to tell you that when
I left my marital home 22months ago, I entered into one
of my biggest food and drinkaddiction periods, since I
weighed 240 pounds.
Oh yes, I am still right nowtoday sitting on 20 extra pounds
(12:55):
, and the medical world wouldconsider me obese.
Now look around you, especiallypeople who live in America.
There are people that aremorbidly obese, and people who
are in shape and have thecorrect amount of body fat on
(13:29):
their body are now the minorityin America.
I can show you pictures.
I was 238 pounds and I waspushing a size 28.
And then I woke up some 18years ago and I finally I lost
with the help of oh, I can'tremember the name of it now the
(13:54):
weightlifting one.
I lost 98 pounds and I still amcarrying 20 pounds on my body.
So I am very familiar with theconsumption of food, with the
consumption of alcohol, with theconsumption of nicotine,
cannabis, speed, speed balls,cocaine.
(14:15):
I am very, very well versedabout addictions, and that might
not be your thing, butconsumerism in our country is
just as addictive.
The level of consumption thatwe identify with as success is
(14:36):
utterly unsustainable.
What does John Robinson say weare doing?
We are gobbling up the world.
And what does the Word of Godsay?
That we are of the world.
We live in the world, but we'renot of the world.
What does the Tao Te Ching sayabout it?
(14:56):
That we are to observe what theworld does and do the opposite.
And yet, what is your addiction?
Humanityville?
Is it your phone?
Oh guilty.
Is it scrolling throughFacebook?
Oh, some days, I'm guilty.
Is it watching marathons on TV?
(15:20):
I used to be guilty of thatyears and years ago.
Is it buying things that youdon't need?
How many of us have so manyclothes in our possession that
we literally don't ever wear allof them?
How many of us have so muchfurniture in our house that we
(15:42):
can barely walk?
How many of us have garages sojam-packed that we can't park
our car?
How many of us have multiplevehicles when there's only one
of us.
I mean, it's not to say thatyou can't have things, but I
(16:02):
want you to look at the designof the matrix towards
consumption.
We are a culture of consumerism,and what does unbridled
consumption bring to the matrix?
It brings inebriation.
It brings ego.
(16:24):
It brings addatisfied people.
It brings the need for more,more, more it.
It it's uh, it reminds me ofthe book that I I've read to all
of my kids and and many of mygrandkids um called give me
(16:46):
hands.
That is what the matrix wantedfor us.
Reach out, reach out, reach outand not, you know, reach out
with love.
No, reach out for more stuff.
Reach out for stuff that'sgoing to make you feel better,
even though it really doesn't.
It makes us sicker and itreally is a form of greed.
(17:09):
It really is a form of greed.
And what is greed?
It's the assumption that it isall for my consumption.
Think about the people thatrise in financial status and
they receive the status quo andthey have all the bells and
whistles that they can imagine.
They can travel anywhere, theycan get whatever kind of health
(17:33):
care they want that nobody elsecan afford.
They have every clothing andjewelry and makeup and
procedures done and they are themost miserable people on the
planet.
Very oftentimes, veryoftentimes, elise Boulder said,
(17:56):
the consumption society has madeus feel that happiness lies in
having things and has failed toteach us the happiness of not
having things.
I'll give you a real-timeexample in my own life.
I've never really been amaterial girl.
I've always had the conceptthat if I'm bringing something
in the house, then something hasto go to goodwill.
(18:18):
That's how I've always lived mylife.
Now, part of it is the scarcitymentality, and that's a whole
nother topic.
But I've not been a trendsetteror no, I shouldn't say that
I've never gone with the trends.
So I'm pretty much the oppositeof that.
(18:38):
I'm the one that wants to notwear makeup and not dye my hair,
and I would prefer to not weara bra and not do what the world
is doing and not do what theworld is doing.
But this whole consumptionprogram was a big well, not a
(18:59):
big part, but part of it.
Toward the end of my days,before I left my home and my
marriage for a season, I wasthinking about how, you know, my
husband just wants to stay inmediocrity.
He doesn't want to rise aboveand he wants to stay in this
house.
That needs repair and you knowwe need to do something about
(19:23):
the hair and the dogs, and onand on and on.
And, interestingly enough, whenI left, I left.
I've talked about this umnauseam, um in prior episodes,
about how I left in my hippieHonda with you know, when I left
(19:46):
this home, I had probably eightor nine boxes, and when I left
for Florida, I reduced that downto probably six that fit in my
little Honda Civic in thehatchback.
I only had a two-door car andthat was what my life was
reduced to.
And I have to tell you that myhappiness quotient really,
(20:06):
really increased.
In regards to physical life,life was so much easier.
I didn't have pets to deal with, I didn't have housework to
deal with, it was just me,myself and I and my six boxes of
possessions.
And when I moved in with mydear roommate Pam, my landlord
(20:27):
Pam, we were sharing herbeautiful home.
It was her home.
I didn't have to worry aboutthe vacuuming, the dusting of
anything but the rooms that Iwas using, and it was a
completely freeing andliberating experience for me
Because, you see, I left and Iwas doing all the dog chores,
(20:51):
all the cooking, all thecleaning, working outside, all
of that stuff that many womenare barking back at because
their self is saying you know, Idon't want to be the only one
doing this, right?
But now let me fast forward youto when I returned.
All of a sudden, none of thatphysical baloney mattered.
(21:15):
I was so happy to be back in ahome with my husband who, by the
way, we always loved each other.
We just I personally didn'tlike him for a long time.
He had a lot of narcissistictendency and I was tired of
being controlled.
And all of that and our timeapart absolutely radically
(21:40):
changed both of us and I camehome and everything was familiar
and it was my home.
It wasn't Pam's home.
The stuff in the house was allfunctional and aesthetics really
don't matter to me anymore.
What's more important to me nowin this stage of life, in this
(22:03):
chapter of my life, is how can Icontribute to my family of
humanity, how can I contributeto my children and my
grandchildren?
And that's a whole nother topic.
And I realized, wow, I reallygot caught in that consumer trap
, didn't I?
And that is what the matrixdoes.
(22:25):
It teaches us that without allof this stuff that, by the way,
we have to work two jobs toobtain it and then we have to
maintain it.
So all of our time is spentmaintaining and earning and
spending and we don't ever havea chance to just be or to just
(22:49):
enjoy the toys that we bought,right?
Chris Lash said the model ofownership in a society organized
around mass consumption, whatis the model of ownership?
Addiction?
And that is what massconsumption has done to us.
We might not be addicted to allthe substance abuses that I
(23:10):
listed earlier.
It may be food.
It may be literally theconsumerism of buying things.
It may be a pantry that is sofull that you could go through
the apocalypse three times.
Maybe it's.
You cannot let go of anythingand you've become a hoarder
because you feel like you neverknow when you're going to need
(23:33):
it.
That's all consumerism.
And what does?
Mindless consumption alwaysturn into Excessive consumption
and thus the addict.
And you know, the focus ofrecent days has been about
getting rid of the violence insociety.
We need to get stop theviolence.
(23:54):
Stop the violence.
Let's look at the definition ofviolence for a minute, folks.
It's the intentional use ofphysical force or power to cause
harm, injury, death orpsychological harm To who To
oneself, another person or acommunity.
(24:16):
So let's back completely awayfrom the matrix programming
concept for a second and look atthe violence we are doing to
ourselves.
That's what I had to look at,man, oh man.
It really began in Floridabecause, you know, I was away
from everything that I thoughtwas my issue, and it was me and
(24:38):
God and nobody else.
And I was still doing violenceto myself with the way I was
eating, the choices I was makingwith my time, the choices I was
making with my lack thereof ofcontribution.
It was violent.
And I had to recognize oh mygosh, do I hate myself that much
(25:03):
that after all these years, I'mstill abusing myself with food?
I'm still abusing myself withexcess.
Everything is an excess with me.
Anything I do, it seems like Iwould do it excessively.
And then one day after I washome for about a month, I
(25:25):
thought, wow, okay, so if I aman eight on the Enneagram and my
downside is excessiveness,couldn't I turn that
excessiveness on to good things?
So that is exactly what I'mdoing.
I'm moving away from consumingso much and I'm being extremely
(25:49):
mindful, not mindless.
Everything that I pick up,certainly, everything I put near
my mouth everything I choose todo.
I am now being mindful about myconsumption and my excessive
tendencies.
So now I'm very proud of myselfthat I can tell you that it
(26:13):
literally now has been sevenwhole days coffee free.
Now I'm still drinking a verylow level of matcha or green tea
, but everything has shifted.
My body that has been so usedto junk and processed food and
(26:35):
massive sugar.
And I'm not going to lie, whenI was in Florida I lived largely
on takeout food, which ishorrible poison for your body.
So to back all that up and tosay if I want to walk this path
of darkness and see the lightcome down and illuminate
(26:58):
everything and enter us into thegolden age, and if I want to
leave the planet better for mygrandchildren than I left it for
my children because my childrenare struggling through this
matrix now too and what did I do?
But I contributed to the matrixfor much of their life so if I
(27:19):
want to be around to do thosethings, then the first thing
that I need to gain back is myhealth running like a well-oiled
machine, and I know how to dothat.
I mean, I lost 98 pounds andkept it off.
I know the things that I haveto do, oh, but the
self-discipline thereof.
And there comes that excessivepersonality of mine.
(27:44):
So turn your excessiveaddictions, your consuming of
things that you don't need, turnit around.
Turn it around.
What does Deb Midra say?
She says that life is not forconsumption but for contribution
(28:05):
.
You see, I don't want to juststay at home and eat my way back
to bad health.
No, I want to be a well-oiledmachine, contributing back to
society, contributing back tothe battle of getting humanity
off the matrix merry-ground.
(28:26):
So I just ask you today, whereare you at on a walkaway
Wednesday, with being a memberof the American Consumption
Society?
Are you doing violence to yourown self?
Are you doing violence toanother person in your family
because your time is consumedwith consumption?
(28:48):
It's consumed with earningenough so that you can buy the
next doodad.
Are you doing harm to yourcommunity by not entering into
any kind of community activities?
Oh, I'm pointing those fingersback to me here.
Humanity, I'm keeping it real.
Keeping it real.
I don't want greed to be theassumption for all of my
(29:12):
consumption.
Oh, I have to get this.
I have to get this.
You know, I'm not going to behappy unless X Y Z and I need to
earn this amount of money inorder for me to do X Y Z.
I don't, I don't want to bethere.
How about you Now?
That's not to say that we can'tbe comfortable and that we
can't consume things, no, butwhen things become out of hand
(29:35):
and it keeps us from gettingback to our true selves, it may
be time to walk away from it.
So, on a walk away Wednesday, Ijust want to ask, with the John
Robbins quote is your level ofconsumption that you identify
with as success sustainable?
(29:57):
Are you into debt up to youreyeballs?
Is it wrecking your health?
Is it wrecking yourrelationships?
Do you have time for nothingbut work?
Are you gobbling up the worldor are you making an impact on
the world for the light?
I love you, humanity, and I askthat you use these words today
(30:23):
to illuminate your own life andask yourself the hard questions
Are there things in my life thatI need to walk away from and
then choose?
Are there things in my lifethat I need to walk away from
and then choose?
Choose today, even if it's justa small iota of a big elephant
(30:45):
that you have to walk away from,the way we walk away from
things often is not to sayanything about overeating, but
it's often one bite at a time.
I love you, humanity.
Have a wonder-filled Wednesday.
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