Second Opinion on Couples Therapy

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
So, Dale, I don't know how much you
know about therapy, but usually starts by you
telling me a little something by yourself.
Another couches and clean show. Look at be
sun.
It's not your fault.
Wanna talk about some those feelings. I love
you.
Obviously,
you don't know me. It's as supposed to
work. Use it. Is it. You we talk.

(00:26):
Hi. I'm Doctor Sam, and I'm Doctor Fran.
Welcome to
Script, the podcast where we put your favorite
Tv shows and movies on the hypothetical couch
and take a deeper dive in way ecology
for trade. We analyze the wait therapy looks
in entertainment, discuss the waste cycle Diagnoses are
portrayed and break down other psychological themes seen
on our screens. As a reminder, Freudian Scripts

(00:47):
is for much informational and entertainment purposes only.
Please consult your mental professional with any questions
and cc care if needed. The content clips
in today's episode will contain exclusive language and
mature and adult themes
Welcome back. We are really excited to be
bringing another second opinion mini session to the
couch this week. You've already gotten 1 the

(01:07):
season with our welcome back mini session. And
so we're excited to bring another 1 back
today with a slightly different focus.
And so as a reminder, the second opinion
sessions,
we use to kind of play off of
the term for when someone seeks advice from
an expert in 1 field. To make sure
that the advice lines up with the information
and the advice they got from a first
expert of getting a second opinion on the

(01:30):
clip. So the idea is that we bring
a clip that we don't think the other
person has seen at least recently or maybe
ever and get their real time reactions to
our clips.
Yes. And so for today,
doctor Fran and I will be surprising each
other with clips. Sometimes we like to
receive clips from the listeners out there, and
then they're are surprise to both of us,

(01:50):
which is always really fun, and we're hoping
to do 1 of those later this season.
But for today, we'll be surprising each other,
and we have each chosen clips that involve
portrayal of couples therapy sessions,
which I think are always scenes from Tv
shows and movies, which are like, rife for
drama and just other, you know,
hilarious potential situations. So I'm curious to see

(02:13):
what doctor Fran has brought for me and
I'm nervous and excited to see her reactions
for the 1 that I brought her today.
For additional clips or sessions related to couples
therapy,
We have done a deeper dive on couples
therapy in our previous episode on couples retreat,
which is a really funny movie and a
great. Podcast sessions. So be sure to listen

(02:34):
to that if you're interested in learning a
bit more and a little bit more formally
about couples therapy. And then we've also done
some other mini sessions like a our recent
Welcome back mini session from this season as
well as past many sessions where we've featured
clips like the 1 from central intelligence. Our
where the rock plays Kevin Hertz, hypothetical couples
therapist. So that was really funny 1 as
well. And I think that's actually where the

(02:55):
sound 1 sound bite from our intro come.
This is not a safe Yes. It is
from radcliffe. This is not a safe place.
It is from that clip because his wife
is, like, really keen and eager to get
what she thinks is
advice from an expert. However,
you know, Kevin Hart character knows that the
rock is really not a therapist, and so
he doesn't wanna talk about, you know, couples

(03:16):
therapy type subjects in front of him.
So really a funny 1 to check. And
it's actually not our intro. It's not our
intro. It's our ph don't, which makes more
sense of it not being a not being
the safe space. Yes. But a clip that
we hear often. I feel like, and listeners
her as well.
And so for today, we'll be putting new
clips on the couch to review related to

(03:37):
couples therapy.
Yeah. And I think you have me up
first. I don't... I think just somehow we
use the same template, and so you always
show me a clip. First. Should.
You're right.
I think That think that.
You just don't wanna go first, so that's
why you've noticed
first
Okay. I always go first and so I
feel like I noticed. Yeah. That's true. We'll

(03:59):
mix it up for next time. But for
today, doctor Fran,
I would like to get your second opinion
on a couple therapy session from Tb
miracle workers. Have you seen or heard of
this show?
No. I know nothing about the show.
It is a really funny show on Tb.

(04:19):
It's actually the fourth. Season
just completed recently.
And it stars...
It's 1 of those ant pathology type shows
where each season. It's a different theme and
they're different characters and there's a different storyline,
but it's always the same actors in in
the show.
And so I chose a scene from the
most recent seasons, the season 4, episode 3

(04:42):
in which the 2 main characters,
So F, who's played by Geraldine Dean Vis
and Sid, who's played by Daniel Radcliffe.
They're a couple who kind of... They... To
were raised and grew up and what they
call kinda of like these, like, bad, like,
wild lands kind of almost like a mad
Max kind of vibe. And now they've moved
to the suburbs, of this kind of like

(05:03):
Mad max society in world,
and they feel that since they've moved to
the suburbs and gotten married that their relationship
is in a bit of a rut
So they go to Frey Ai robot best
friend, whose name is Ty, and he's played
by
Karen Sony.
For couples therapy
using a matrix like simulation. So that's kind
of the backdrop,

(05:24):
and let's see how the the session goes
with the Ai robot therapist.
F
said, thank you for agreeing to do this
important work for your relationship. It's a good
start. Yeah. I'm not sure I'm comfortable talking
about this kind of stuff, especially with your
famously best friend. Everything said here is completely
confidential. Unless of course, I think it's funny

(05:46):
or just plain nasty. Oh, sid. We have
to figure out a way to save our
sex life. K. It's important to me.
Yeah.
Okay. Yeah. Let's let's do it. That's the
spirit. Now I'm gonna need you to put
on your transmitter.
You feel that dean shoots little pinch as
the brain sting shoots into your spine. Sorry.

(06:07):
What?
Oh.
So it... It's like without a out of
context, it's a little hard to figure out
exactly what's happening with the, like, neural.
But in general... It's interesting. I think if
you admit not mentioned it was an Ai,
I don't think I would have known Yeah.
That the character because it's, you know, it's

(06:28):
very lifelike, if you know if you are
watching the clip, you can it's, you know,
just a regular actor and, you know, it's
just kinda done up with extra gadgets, I
guess see and can look more mechanical.
Well they start off kind of well with
the, you know, opening, and then they mentioned
mention everything's confidential but with this caveat of,
like, of us, I think it's funny, which
is definitely not appropriate maria.

(06:50):
It's also interesting that,
1 of the characters in the couple immediately
is like, we need to talk about sex
life it kind of jumps into that right
away. I don't think that's
necessarily out of completely out of the question
that something like that could happen where the
clients are coming in and they're like, we
need to jump into this topic, and then
I feel like as a therapist, you might
be like, okay. Well, before we get there,

(07:11):
maybe we should, you know,
start with something a little bit easier and
not jump to the most difficult topic that
you came in to talk about. Yeah. Very
true. And it's also probably because it is
Frey as best friend. So she's just like
ready to talk and kinda dish right? Whereas,
like, sid, he's much more uncomfortable. Like, this
is your friend, and now we're talking about
our sex life.

(07:32):
There's not much context for the neurotransmitters. Like,
that's just out of the blue first time
you see that. Like, he just brings it
up and definitely doesn't get informed consent about...
You know, what's about happen because we see
in the clip. They're shocked
literally figuratively.
Alright. Let's keep listening.
Where are we? A place to explore the

(07:53):
outer reaches of your sexual reality.
Welcome
to the matrix x. 6.
But what why why are you saying it
like that?
Oh, it's like the matrix, but with 3
x's at the end, you know? Like a
sex thing.
Oh
you gotta have to see it written out

(08:14):
for it to work. No no it works.
Is good. Yeah. It's funny.
Anyway,
the matrix 6 6 is a simulated reality.
Your bodies are back in the real world.
Being watched by scraps.
Scraps, do you read me? Y. You're coming
in loud and clear boss, I'm not exactly
sure what I'm looking at here Just a

(08:34):
bunch of numbers falling dennis. Screen, but I'm
just gonna keep on looking back and forth
these monitors and randomly pressing stat. That's their
job. By the way.
The only way to counteract the boner killing
effect Of married life is by introducing ever
more elaborate kinks into the bedroom. But first,
we're gonna need builders.
Lots of d dose. Escalated quickly.

(09:01):
The simulation can manifest your wildest fantasy simply
by thinking of them. If things ever get
too intense, the safe word.
This bogey board.
Yeah. I don't know. I think this this
might be just a little much to me,
Maybe we stop but just lighting some candles
or put on some mood music smooth ass
can be very kinky.
I'm curious, Doctor Fran. So we're about to

(09:23):
get into there, I guess... Like fantasies and
like things they wanna talk about, But what
do you think about the therapist or, you
know, like, ties
introduction to just like, okay, we're gonna start
talking about kinks. It's the only way to
fix your marriage. Yeah. I mean super abrupt
and I think the context you gave during
the last break about. This is her friend.
Right? And so

(09:45):
she kind of already... She hasn't... Like, the
the therapist has an agenda, like, knowing
what the client, what the female client probably
wants or is, like, looking for or, like,
not feeling fulfilled in the relationship, so maybe
that's why. It's kind of heading in that
direction because that seems to be maybe something
more that she wants than he wants.
But it is very... Yeah. Very abrupt up
to vary, like, escalate very quickly in terms

(10:06):
of... And there's not, like you said earlier,
not a lot of informed consent. It's not
like... How is the feeling or, like, how
would you all feel about this? I think
this could be helpful. What's your opinion on
that? It's just like, this is what we're
doing and be very true.
And then even Daniel Radcliffe characters like, well,
why don't we, you know, tone it down
a little, and I would he's kind of
telling you Does feel comfortable with the pace

(10:27):
that it's moving and he wants to do
something
that feels more comfortable and isn't ready to
kinda jump into that.
And so I think that's
he may not be voicing that directly, but
that's a clear signs of the therapist that,
hopefully they would pick up on Yeah. To
check in then maybe readjust the approach. I
agree a hundred percent. The therapist
is not really, like, asking any questions getting

(10:49):
to know what they want being very directive.
And, yeah, Daniel Radcliffe character said he's like,
wait. Whoa. And I feel like they're not
him. And also his wife, They're not really
listening to him at least in this, like
context. So... Let's see how the Yeah. The
fantasies play out relax. This will just be
silly and fun. Here. I'll go first.

(11:14):
This is silly and fun.
In monster.
I'll never give the coordinates to oasis. No
matter what you do to my hot little
body. God. Frey, I would never dream of
hurting you. I love you. Now. Sid, we're
role playing. I'm the helpless president and you're
the evil mechanic. Now, I want you to
take control of me. Right

(11:35):
okay.
Yeah. I... I'm a mean scary
guy.
I guess we're gonna have to do this
help. Away.
I am so sorry. I did not realize
I was gonna do that.
That was amazing.
Doing it again. What you like that? That
that looks so painful. Said, I'm not some
delicate flour. Okay. I can handle it. I

(11:58):
want you to zap me like a baked
potato.
Okay.
Here I go.

(12:22):
I think this one's really... I guess I
have a few thoughts. I think 1, I
appreciate that they're trying to maybe
normalize or d ties, like, different.
Sexual fantasy user or different interest and showing
that it can maybe sometimes be different within
the couple relationship. And that's probably 1 thing
that they're struggling with. They may have for
interests and different desires and different things that

(12:43):
they find pleasurable. Oh, just your way that
might be causing some conflict. Yeah.
For
And another important piece of, like, engaging in
and we, you know, oh, that was another
1 we didn't mention that we've talked about
couples therapy somewhat in is, like, in sex
education. Right. So Mh talking about, like, sex
therapy in itself is its own

(13:04):
whole, area,
like, specialty in psychology, which I think this
couple could really benefit from of how do
you find ways that feel safe and comfortable
for both people to explore their interest in
a way that feels good for everyone. And
still, like, it's your needs met, but also
respects the other person's boundaries and what they
feel comfortable with. True. Because you're right, like,

(13:25):
Dan Radcliffe because characters just kind of thrown
into it, and we see in that last
thing that we were listening to, she is
basically asking him to, like, shock her. And
she's enjoying it, but he doesn't enjoy physically
harming her as we hear him and say,
like, no. I you. I don't wanna do
that. And she's, like, expressing, oh, it feels
good, but he's like, oh, yeah. I like
it too. Wherein in it's very obvious, like,
he's trying to maybe do it to please
her, but he's not enjoying himself.

(13:48):
Alright. Luke... Yeah. You're you're hinting that it
escalate even further. So I'm... Curious to see.
Just... When you mentioned that they have different
things that they're interested in, you're about to
see the other end of the spectrum I
suppose for his character. So let's listen to
what happens last.
Why'd did you stop? I was just about
to explode? Yes. What do you have against
giving your wife pledge? No. That was a

(14:10):
pleasure I can... Still snow her hair burning.
Are you really telling me you've never had
a single secret sexual fantasy in your entire
life?
Don't Of course, everyone's got something. Really?
You never told me, What is it? No.
I can't. It's not appropriate you'll your think
I'm weird. Sid, I love you and I
wanna make you happy. But there's nothing you

(14:31):
could say that would turn me off. Please.
I. She handles that 1. I promise. I
promise.
I really wanna hear.
Okay.
Yeah I am sexually attracted to boulders.
I'm sorry. What was that?
When I was a young,
road wonder experiencing my first sexual stirring.

(14:55):
There weren't a lot of people around, but
there were
a lot of boulders,
and I think that I may have
accidentally
projected
some of my feelings onto
Ben.
So yeah. Like rocks. Rocks.
I'm horny for Boulders.

(15:15):
What
Haven't heard that 1 before.
That's great.
Really? Yeah.
Yeah. Boulders.
I mean, that's? That's what you try tie.
Oh, no. I know this is supposed to
be a judgment free zone, but your boys
are freak. Oh, no.
Exactly.
So that's evidence with therapist.

(15:37):
Okay. Good. I thought we were gonna get
another visual of them,
you know, having a sexual moment with folders.
So that does occur if you're interested check
out the full
episode, but we're not gonna continue to listen
today. I see. I see. You're gonna spare
me with them from that. Clip today.
I mean, I think all in all this

(15:58):
therapist is not a therapist clearly. Right? It
doesn't matter that they're an Ai that they're
Ai, the they're they're her... You know, they're
just not a therapist. They don't really do
much that's therapeutic to be honest. And that
Definitely not.
Kinda try to boss them in a way
that doesn't work and then keep making caveat.
Like, this is supposed to be judgment free,
but I'm judging you. But this is supposed
to be confidential, but I'm not gonna keep

(16:18):
it confidential. So definitely not a safe space
is kevin it's it I would say. This
is not a safe place.
Yeah. Exactly.
Yeah. I think we kinda highlighted a little
bit while we were watching, But I think
the
the woman in it. She does start try
to,
like, create the safe space actually for him
to open up and she's, like, excited of,
like, I wanna know what your sexual fantasies
is so that I can meet your needs

(16:39):
and she really wants and she, like, says
I'm not gonna judge you, and then you
can tell she is judging, but she's trying
so hard not too.
Yeah. It's very true.
Kinda like how he was. Like, I felt
like he wasn't maybe judging her, but was
uncomfortable in trying, and then she was kinda
like uncomfortable with his and also trying.
Spoiler.
I won't spoil it totally leaks. I think
people should watch the show or watch the

(17:00):
episode. But they do go on to resolve
their differences in a way where they, like,
meet in the middle on. It's actually really
nice endings.
He p her with rocks. No. They try
the rocks. Doesn't work just like the the
burning or the electric computing.
And then they both... They start to kind
of
like, ironically talk about, like, oh, well, if

(17:22):
we were a boring couple, we would get
dressed up, and then they, like, get dressed
and like, we would just go on a
date to this bar and it would be
like this and they're kinda of talking ironically,
but then they start to realize, like, oh,
actually, like, the food is pretty good And
the drinks are pretty good, and we're having
a good time and then they kinda reconnect
that way.
Nice. Yeah.
Good That's funny. Well, yeah, Was an interesting
clip therapy. I would give it a thumbs

(17:44):
down. 2 thumbs down. Ai thumbs down Down.
It's true. I like... We'll be taking our
jobs anytime soon. No. That's true. Job security.
But I do think you're summarizing
statement.
The therapist is not a therapist.
Unfortunately, holds true in a lot of couples
therapy. Like, a lot of the couples therapy.

(18:05):
Per portrayal that we see in moving Tv
shows. They always try to make it super
funny. So it's always like, a friend playing
the therapist. Like, someone who's not a therapist
playing the therapist. Right? Like, this happens a
lot just like in this scenario. It's, like,
therapy is so easy for couples let's just
bring our best friend in and fix it
for us. Right? That kind of right. Mentality.
So a good summary. That's the 1 we
had brought now. It's coming back to me.

(18:26):
The central intelligence clip we talked about earlier.
We did a second opinion on fake or
we did a real rounds on fake therapy
therapy. And so we did central intelligence and
we did how to lose guy out, which
is the same concept.
Where they... Have a friend, pretend to be
the therapist and only 1 per 1 person
is on it and the other not. So
yeah. Yeah, very common
book this like, Yeah. Not real therapist posing

(18:48):
as a therapist in a couples therapy session.
Very true. I have a whole list of,
like, clips from different shows and movies that
do this. I'm always ready when we do
couples therapy.
Well, I will say,
I do actually have a real therapist in
my clip, So let's
transition.

(19:13):
Alright. Doctor Sam. So I would like to
get your second opinion on a clip from
the movie bad moms. Have you seen that
movie? I have seen it, but it has
been a while. And there's more than 1.
Right? Yes. I believe this clip is from
the first 1. First 1. Yeah. There's multiple
bat, and then there's, like, bad moms Christmas.
Like, at the say that seventh. Yeah. Expanded.
Yeah.
So,

(19:34):
for those who haven't seen the movie, or
haven't seen in a while,
it stars Mila K is Amy, and her
and her husband Mike, like by David Walton.
Are dealing with some marital and parenting struggles,
and they seek a session from a therapist
who's played by Wanda Sykes. So lead that's
kinda setting the scene that's kind of all
you get is that they're dealing with some
samaritan call marital conflict.

(19:55):
So I'm curious to hear your impressions of
the session. I don't remember this scene, so
I'll be curious to see. I like to
start by saying
that every marriage is receivable.
Just need 2 people who are willing to
work at it. Okay?
Mike, Amy, I want you to look at
each other and say 3 things.

(20:16):
That you like about each.
Mine? Can I go second?
Okay. Yeah. Sure.
Amy,
Okay. Mike, I
like that you gave me my children.
I like that you pick them up from
school sometimes. It's...
Actually really helpful.

(20:36):
And
I I like that you came to therapy
today.
Okay. Mike your turn. K.
I like
your spaghetti,
and you make pretty good cal.
Was that 3? That that was, like,
1, and then 1 a.

(20:58):
You know what?
Let's try some role playing. Okay? So, of
course, we're gonna get into a role playing.
Love role plays and come therapy on Tv.
Yeah.
I do like how
the therapist wanda to sykes character. She tries
to come at it from a strengths approach.

(21:18):
Like, she's trying to start off on a
positive note. Like, okay, Let's like, you know,
before we get into maybe, like, what concerns
and issues and those kind of things which
can be heavy in the therapy session, especially
for couples therapy. She's kinda like, let's start
off on a positive note, name through things
that you like about your partner, can you
can tell that both of them are trying
to stretch for positives because even, like, Mila

(21:38):
k characters like, mostly about the children.
Mh. But also, she's appreciative that he's up
therapy, which I think is a nice thing
Like, right? He's there doing the work, like
therapist mentioned. Ready to work on it. But
then his are very, like, surface level and
Yeah. Not even full statements.
So
I know. And I think it's a missed
sadly a missed opportunity to try to pull

(21:59):
for that? I think it's therapist. I'd probably
be, like, you know, what about what... Were
things that I think a common 1 is
like, thinking about, like, what first drew you
to this person or, like, what are some
qualities that you really admire them. Right? Like,
sometimes that question might feel too open ended
and people might. Struggle with it, but maybe
there's a way to reframe or give some
leading questions that could get him closer
to something. Yeah. Just giving some guidance, some

(22:21):
ideas. I feel like it's always helpful to
normalize and give examples so that people kind
of, oh, okay, those kind of things are
to think about. Mh. He definitely seemed kinda
stuck and maybe kinda hungry.
So very focused on food.
Maybe she's a... Yeah. What do you think?
See he could say that. So wouldn't think.
Yeah. Yeah.
I'm curious if she opens it was saying,

(22:43):
like, basically, like, any marriage can be
salvage.
What do you think about that? Oh, yeah.
That's true.
I think that's maybe a controversial take on
couples therapy,
because I know a lot of times therapists
are, like, there's no...
They don't have a desired out. Outcome right,
the outcome will kinda be, like, what ends
up working best for the people involved. And

(23:03):
whether that is, like staying together and making
changes or you know, finding happiness in different
directions. Right? So I think that's also her
kinda coming out pretty
assertive positive, like, oh, every marriage can be
saved. Let's start off on the positive. So
I think that can possibly set up for,
like, unrealistic expectations and maybe some additional frustrations,
like, if they feel like, they're not un

(23:25):
unquote the right track with therapy. So... Mh.
Yeah. We're like, what does it feel about
them if they don't.
I feel like Failure, and I got... I'm
I'm bearing the lead a little bit. We'll
see what happens in the rest of the
session.
Yeah. But that's a complex thing around, like,
relationships that end and especially marriages and divorce.
There's often a lot of feelings of failure

(23:45):
and a lot of like, guilt or judgment
or potential stigma related to that I think
you're right, Doctor Fran in a comment like
that can kind of, you know, not purposely,
but probably
perpetuate, like, those kind of feelings and, like,
okay. So So even if maybe there is
a positive outcome for the 2 of us
where we're not together, Now we're really forcing
this outcome of staying together. Right? Mh.

(24:06):
Alright. Let's see how the role play goes.
Alright. Amy. I want you to pretend to
be Mike
and Mike.
I want you to pretend to be Amy.
K? And now I just want you to
just tell me about your day.
Hi. I'm Amy.
All I did today was my

(24:27):
revolution on my face
and
talk to talk to talk to Talk. Okay.
So interestingly here, I wanted to note really
quick. This is actually not uncommon and real
people do this, like when they're are all
of a sudden portraying someone else. They'll put,
like, a different voice.
And I think the voice they choose can
be very telling Right. He's using a voice

(24:48):
that is not very pleasant.
And just very judgmental and also validating, like,
all I did today is just put lotion
on my face and top Right? So coming
off really negatively
and, you know, obviously, I think just kind
of
poking at her and tag it amazing. Like,
this isn't something that I will imagine is

(25:09):
gonna go over well. And I don't know
if the doctor's is gonna redirect let's listen.
Amy, Would you like to Yes. I would.
And
Hey, I'm Mike.
My life is awesome because my wife takes
care of everything in the world for me?
This is the problem. Here's the bottom line?
She's a perfection. So what's the point of

(25:31):
even trying? How is that a problem? She
hasn't it given me a glow? Since my
lord 5 years ago. I just showed enough.
Hold on. 1 second. On blow. Maybe if
you clean the kitchen. I would made the
kids dinner. Cared for someone other than yourself,
I would give you so many blow your
fucking dick would explode. Dick would never. Focus.
It's ind.

(25:51):
I've gonna I can't deal with you. I
can't fucking look at you. I'm so in
this clip, the doctors just kinda like, head
down. Own,
shaking her head, but she's not really
interject at all or trying to guide the
conversation. She's really letting it escalate. Right now,
they're, like, in a full on argument.
There's a lot of accusations flying. Like, he's

(26:11):
accusing her of being a perfection she's accusing
him of being, like, pretty self centered and,
like, not helpful. There's a lot of disconnects
here,
but we're... There's no attempt to kind of
bring these... She's to the surface or to
conversation in more productive manner. Right. Yeah. I
think, a a common strategy someone might use
as a couple therapists in this is, like
slowing it down a bit. But hold on.

(26:31):
Like, yeah. Mike, I'm hearing that you feel
that, you know, it's hard for you to
be, like, a good husband when you feel
like Amy's. You know, expecting something really to
you Or Mh. Yeah. Amy, it seems like
you feel frustrated that mike doesn't do more
around the house. Right? Then that kind of
helps, validate what they're experiencing
to kind of dee escalate as opposed to

(26:52):
like, let it just continue escalating lady. Though
I will say at the same time, depending,
like, what stage of couples therapy it is.
I think some level of letting this go
like, play out is use... Is information gathering.
Of, like, what does it look like? The
time people are kind of on there. Maybe
best behavior when they're in front of the
therapist, but here you're getting a picture into,
like, what does it actually look like when
they fight, you know, they're being pretty

(27:14):
pretty mean and, you know, throwing out
accusations and being harsh with each, so you're
getting good information on, like, what does conflict
look like for this couple?
Very true observing it in real time, and
I think you're right, then hopefully being able
to utilize that data and information to guide
future treatment. So, okay, you all were discussing
the way that you were feeling, but the

(27:35):
way you were doing it, it might make
your partner feel like you're accusing them, like
you were saying,
like, your a perfection is, and I can't
do anything right. Right? Then you could bring
in, like, eye statements and other, like, more
productive communication strategies like, well, I feel inadequate
or sad, when I'm unable to meet, like,
the expectations I feel, like you... You know,
like, those kind of ways instead of being
like, you make me feel this way because

(27:55):
you are this and doing that.
Yeah. For sure. And of, Has all started
with the role play of just, like, this
is the very un unstructured
Oh, yeah. Pretend to be your partner and
talk about your day. It's not, like, pretend
to be your partner and tell
yourself what you would like to hear or
something... That's. How would you like your partner
to talk to you after at after a

(28:16):
long day of work. Right? Or I think
that We're back in into the positive things.
Like, your partner sharing positive about you because
she kinda gave him free reign, and he
just went right in, like, being critical.
Yes.
Okay. Let's see how it wraps up here.
My
I don't love you anymore. I'm so...

(28:36):
Sorry, but I just don't... I'm so sick
and tired of pretending like I do.
That is exactly
how I feel.
Okay.
Remember when I said that All marriages
are sa,

(28:59):
will ain't gonna happen for you guys.
So what do you think we should do?
Well, as a therapist, I'm not allowed to
tell you what to do,
but
as a human being with 2 fucking eyes
in my head.
Yeah. I think you should get divorced as
soon as possible
This is catastrophic shit. Oh, wow. Okay. So

(29:21):
then she finally is being very directive.
Yes. That's it. Yeah. All a sudden, she's
has a lot to say.
Yeah. Now she's a allowed to say. I
thought it was interesting because she's at I'm
not allowed to tell you what to do
as a therapist. You know, typically,
many can approach therapies is, like, not wanting
to be too directive and telling people what
to do. It's more about how them, come

(29:43):
to
realizations and learn strategies and different ways to,
you know, approach their thoughts or feelings, whatever
the case may be. Letting
but I thought it was interesting that she
says, I'm not allowed to help you. And
then she's also being kinda judgmental. She's like,
well, as a human, it's just obvious that
you guys are catastrophic.
And should it to worse immediately. I definitely
think that's an inappropriate,

(30:04):
like, just blanket statement to make towards them.
I think maybe a potential approach she could
have tried is like, okay. Well, it seems
like you both are an agreement
that you no longer have these feelings for
each other. So what would you all think
would be the next best steps for you
all as individuals. Right? Like, what are you
too wanting to do next as opposed to
telling them what to do?

(30:25):
It's the first time we hear that they
agree about something and the agreement is kinda
like what I alluded to in the beginning
that they're... They don't really have the same
feelings that they have for each other and
possibly a better outcomes await them if they
do, you know, kinda move on separately. Mh.
Yeah. That's what Was kinda saying. We were
a little bit, like, foreshadowing the rest of
the clip, though. From the beginning, you kinda
tell it probably was not gonna end positively

(30:46):
and it sounds like a major piece of
the of the movie is, you know, Amy
kind of going off on her on and
stuff. I also... Yeah. The this couple also
has kids so thinking about, like, true. When
she says, like, you need to do divorce
and immediately of, like, that's... Not as easy
as it sounds. Right? So thinking about, like,
for this couple, what does that mean? What
would separation or divorce look like if that's

(31:07):
what they wanna do and and kinda talking
that through. But I think... Yeah. Like, from
the beginning going into it, like, every every
relationship is salvage we're meeting it sounds like
this couple didn't want to necessarily salvage the
relationship.
And so they're, you know, at least an
agreement and can kinda move forward with whatever
that means for them next.
True. I don't remember, like, what happens before

(31:28):
this. Clip, but it almost... You got the
sense that they're both here almost to click,
like, to check a box. To be like,
well, we even tried therapy. And it didn't
work because as we hear, like, maybe they
both have already clicked come to terms with
how they feel and, like, what they're actually
wanting out of it, and I do have,
like, a slight memory that he also, like,
is maybe seeing someone else. Right? And, yeah.
So I think, you know, he definitely already
knew that he was on his way out

(31:50):
of the relationship, and she's not feeling satisfied
in the relationship. And so
I think that you get that sense right
away from the therapies. They're both just, like,
kinda there going through the motions. Mh.
I think maybe a good approach for therapist
too would be like, okay.
After they decide that they don't have the
same feeling for each other anymore They're no
longer in love, asking them what they may

(32:10):
gonna do in terms of next steps. Also,
this is a couple of people, maybe no
longer a couple, but a couple of people
who, you know, don't really communicate very productively
very effectively. And so it might be worthwhile,
like, having some of those conversations, like, you
mentioned Doctor Fran, Like, what do we want
in terms of
parting ways, a potential timeline, How do we
wanna... Talk to the kids about it. Like,

(32:31):
just having a chance to talk about some
of these things, learn some ways to communicate
with each other especially because things are likely
going to get more stress well and not
less stressful as they do navigate a potential
divorce and, you know, separating their family and
all of that. Yeah. Definitely. So overall, how
do you feel like this... Portrayal of the
therapist was.
It's a little bit less clear than the

(32:51):
clip you showed me, I think. Yeah. Definitely
less clear. I need
there was more promise and that she was
a therapist, and I think the sign showed,
like, that I she's had her bar.
Our bar is are you a therapist.
Yes or no.
She wasn't an actor
pretending to be a therapist. She was actually

(33:11):
an actor playing a therapist. There's a difference.
So I do think, you know, she's, like
a doctor a therapist, so we do know
that. It's not a per pretend person.
And then...
I think she starts off with some promise.
Like, I don't like how she kinda guaranteed
the relationship would be saved, but she started
off with some promise trying to bring in
some positives. She jumped... To a role play

(33:33):
really quick. We never really elicit it a
lot of, like, opinions or concerns or whatever
from the couple, and then she was like,
very directive at the end, advising them to
get divorce and being pretty critical and judgmental.
So I would still say not a very
good,
and maybe not a super accurate depiction of
a couples therapy session. The couple part, I

(33:53):
think maybe that, is accurate. Like, I could
see and have seen couples, you know, struggling
and kind of getting mad at each other
and accusing. Right? Those are the kind of
things that might lead them to come a
couples therapy. So that per portrayal, I could
see happening.
Yeah. I think that's fair. Well, listeners, if
you all have examples of clicks that are
good. Couples therapy session real fast

(34:15):
and
well portrayed accurate and you want us to
kind of dissect them and tell you if
they're at actually realistic or not, Like, send
us those because I like those are the
ones we don't seem to find as often
and shoes,
not realistic portrayal.
We find the more like funny ones I
like, or those are the ones that are
more out there. So definitely send us if
you have other per portrayal. And in general,

(34:36):
we're always really excited to do second opinion
reactions. So send us clips that have other
psychological themes or other portrayal of therapists, not
just couples therapy, and maybe you'll find yours
on the podcast.
And as always, anything you're interested in having
us put on the couch and discuss, you
can send via email or any of our
social media features.

(34:56):
Time up.
See it session.
We'd like to thank Arp Brandon, Creative director
Eric
at web.
We would not like to thank our producer

(35:17):
brandon.
He's fired.