The Christmas Chronicles 2018 (Escape from North Pole w/ Santa Plissken)

Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
and welcome everybody to another holiday themed episode of Fried Rice Podcast. I am your host,

(00:25):
Andy Rice, let's get fried. With me, as always, it's Brennan. Shippley, up to Boston.
Hello everybody. That was him coughing. How did you not go Christmas themed? This is a regular Fried Rice episode.

(00:46):
But it's still a Christmas episode. We're just Fried Rice reviewing a Christmas movie. If you want our Christmas themed magic,
you listen to our 8 to 12 crazy nights at Christmas coming up in about a week or so. However many we did.
And that was, as always, Brennan, he starts us off with the bong rip so you can hear the coughing. It's real.

(01:09):
It's real authentic coughing. With us as always, it is Michael Walt Disney's final words on this planet were
Michael Larson is the future of entertainment, Larson. Everybody. And that comes from a story Brennan was telling us about Walt Disney.
Kurt Russell. Of the movie we watched, Kurt Russell. Yeah. What was the story? He said Kurt Russell is the future of entertainment.

(01:34):
Kurt Russell is the future of Disney. That's a crazy thing to say. Was there a movie they just finished at the time?
No, I think he was still young. I think he did some sort of show. There was something early on in his career that he did.
And Walt Disney was like, no, he's it. He's the one. He's the chosen one. And I mean, shit, look at him now. He wasn't wrong.

(01:56):
He wasn't wrong. So many great movies. So your final words are going to be Wyatt Russell is the future of entertainment?
Maybe. I mean, my child's name is Wyatt. Now, Wyatt Russell, as we all know, I think is most famously today known as Evil Captain America.

(02:16):
The U.S. soldier is what the name of that guy is called. But he stars in this really cool, really interesting comedy drama called The Lodge.
Oh, that is fantastic. I love that show. Did you watch that one, Brendan? It's only like one or two. It's like one or two seasons.

(02:39):
But I it blew my mind when I realized that was his Wyatt Russell, that it was a Kurt Russell son, because I didn't see it at first.
But they look a lot alike. Yeah. Well, I think as you a soldier, he looks a lot like his dad in the lodge.
He plays like a beach bum and he's got the long hair and the ball and beard does not look like his dad.
Like I thought he was just a just his own. He's honestly a good blend of both of them. Oh, is he Goldie Hawn as well?

(03:04):
I think he's Goldie Hawn's. I thought he was Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. Well, they've been together for 30 years.
So, I mean, like maybe they've been together 30 something years. 83, I think. Yeah. So why Russell?
Yeah, that's 40 something years. Yeah. But I will say the Lodge. Still not married. The Lodge. Still not married.
If you haven't seen that, it's it's great. Just beach bum.
He goes into like a Shriner's Lodge or like a Moose Lodge and he ends up like discovering some secret stuff.

(03:29):
And it's cool. It's like. But it's on Hulu. Yeah.
Just check that one out if you if you like why Russell also with his dad on.
What is the show that they're both on? Kurt and Wyatt Russell on Apple TV.
Oh, I don't know. No, it's great. It's the Godzilla show. I just can't remember the name of it.
You're talking about eight. It's the name of the monarch. That's what it is.

(03:54):
It's the name of the agency. I haven't seen that one either. It's a fantastic show. Yeah.
I'm so far behind on everything. But yet.
So before we get into because we're all anxious to dive into this movie because this was a new one for all three of us,
which does not happen very often on the show that not because typically one of us has recommended the movie.
Now, this recommendation came specifically from two girls that we are friends with.

(04:20):
We actually took one of our movies off and added this. Yeah.
This was going to be the Santa Claus movies.
I mean, I was going to force these dudes to watch all three, the Santa Claus is and the show and the show and then home improvement,
Christmas episodes and Last Man Standing Christmas episodes and his brand new one with Kat Dennings,

(04:41):
where he plays a boomer like Maga Dad, I think.
Grandpa, I'm not sure what the vibe is, but Kat Dennings moves in with him with her kids and he's a he's a living.
I think you're describing a poor news. No, no, no. It's a new thing. I saw a trailer for it.
It's Kat Dennings is having having not spoken to her father for many years down on her luck,

(05:06):
shows up with her semi grown teenage to child children and make and now they live with Grandpa, who's Tim Allen, who's a
what's just another variation of the same show. Basically stick with what works.
Yeah. Yeah. Basically, it'd be like if home improvement, if he had gotten divorced or she died and he's now living alone.

(05:30):
But one of the kids is that J.T.T. comes back having not spoken to him because they had political differences.
It's been 20 years and now he comes to move in with that's where he works at like a outdoor store.
No, that is Last Man Standing. So he has exactly the same show.
That's what Mike's making the point of home improvement, Last Man Standing and now whatever this one's called.

(05:52):
Going to be all the same. You mean Kat and they're all great.
I mean, I can't really. Yeah, they're all great. Yeah. Well, because Tim Allen, he's got he knows what he's doing when it comes to sitcom dad, sitcom grandpa.
He's like legit. Yeah. But yeah. OK. So the what are we smoking section we like to do here.
I work today. We're doing jelly breath. It's Mendo breath crossed with dositos. It's an indica.

(06:19):
I just got to say if I was doing a marketing for anything, I don't think anything breath is really great.
Yeah. The thing is, is I'm interested to see where the future takes us, where we're going to get more uniform stuff.
So like alcohol back in the day, I'm sure went out before we had you go to the store and there's your Budweiser, your cores and whatever the set brands that have taken over the monopoly of the beer companies.

(06:53):
You would probably go and it would just be like, yeah, these beers were crafted by somebody local.
Yeah, this is Bob's beer. This is, you know, Mike's beers, whatever, which is kind of funny that we've gone full circle with that and have come back to that.
Because now it's beers, small craft beers where it's at. It's better than those big brands.

(07:14):
Now, you say better flavor. You say better. I want to circle back to that in just a second, because I don't want to lose my train of thought on this one.
Support the little guy. But real quick, before we get into if it's a professional craft beer, I'd say it's better. Yeah.
If you go to one of those make your own beer places, which a girlfriend of mine at one point took me to where you go and you make your own beer, you mix all the ingredients together.

(07:35):
And then you come back X amount of weeks later. Yeah, you come back weeks later. OK, that's what I'm trying to figure out.
And you and they give you a bottle with like a custom label. They give you like a 12 pack or 24 pack. My wife, that's cool.
My wife one year for Christmas got me a kit, make your own home brew kit. Interesting. I never did it. It ended up expiring. All my yeast and everything expired.
I'm kind of bummed I didn't because I wanted to. Do you still have the kit? No, I threw it away.

(07:59):
Because there's probably parts of the kit you could have used if you just replaced the yeast or whatever. I could I could have used the whole bucket itself and all that stuff it came with.
But you had to get your own bottles and things like that to bottle it up and then store it, you know, in a cooler, dark environment for however long it needs to activate the yeast and alcohol.
That's why you there's this place did it professionally. It was like one of those date places like go on a date, get yourself a Bavarian pretzel, get some of their beers and then make your own beer.

(08:27):
It's like a fun to bring into that those automatic second date. Yeah, because you got to go back to pick up the beer. Yeah. Now, later. Yeah.
Weeks. Yeah, I think it was like maybe six weeks later or whatever. But the beer we got that we made awful. I don't know what we fucked up.
I don't know what we did, but it was gross beer. Not very good. We tried to make a heft, but it just wasn't. Yeah. See, I wanted to I wanted to make my beer and I wanted to add weed to it.

(08:56):
Use it. That was my plan. But yeah, of course, I was lazy. And then also we had a new baby. So why does it that is just what we did.
We did use beer. Yeah. Laganitas, one of the bigger craft brands now was talking about doing that at one point.
And, you know, because hops and weed are related. Right. So, like, naturally, those flavors go together well.

(09:22):
But I don't know if they ever really did. I don't know if they ever followed through with it. Maybe it's maybe they're still working on the legality of THC or something.
They should be able to do no problem with the CBD. Yeah. There's so many good ideas that are being demonstrated.
I thought of one called the Cannabis and it's a party bus where they lock off the inside. You get to smoke weed on your way to wherever you're going. I think they have those like tours.

(09:45):
They have tours in Denver. But I was thinking like L.A. to Vegas. Three hours. You smoke TVs. You're smoking the whole way.
And then you go to and then takes you back home the next day or whatever. And it's like a full drivers in a hermetically sealed hermetically sealed environment.
It can't get high. Yeah. Window at the front. Yeah. No. But my point I was making about the we're still in the we're still in the infancy, the wild west of weed. Right.

(10:10):
It's now being it's now legal in certain states right now. More and more places. Right.
But we don't have that universal thing like you said. Mendo breath crossed with dositos.
You know, like this one is donut shop and this is what is this? Holy moly. Cross with gelato. This one's your right.
OK. We're buying the same brand now. So it's like yeah. And then like white cherry cross with gelato is white cherry gelato. I mean, they're all 20 years.

(10:42):
Am I going to go to Wal-Mart? Well, they'll have a weed section because it's going to be next to the alcohol.
When I go to the weed section of Wal-Mart, that'll always be behind the counter like cigarettes. So yeah, sure.
OK. But when I go to purchase it, when I go to purchase my my five pack of weed, a pack of joints, pack of joints.

(11:04):
Right. When I'm surprised the big tobacco companies haven't started trying to know they are.
They're just waiting. They have to be. They have to be more borough. They want to be nationwide.
They're going to wait till it's legal everywhere. But they will. That's what the federal government drops it, which they say they're going to.
That's when they'll be like, all right, everywhere. Then, yeah, they'll make more borough and all those other companies.

(11:27):
They just start infusing their regular cigarettes. Yeah.
But when I go buy those, am I going to get like Obama skull fuck or am I going to get like like goat goat terrorist or something like there's some names that I've seen for weed that are absolutely.
These are just people making shit up, obviously, because they made a strain that's not quite like another strain. So like, I'm just going to call this, I don't know, Hillary Clinton's a bitch or whatever.

(11:55):
Right. Because that's like they'll do stuff like that. They'll make it so that you have to market to a certain genre.
Yeah, it would blow my mind if there's not already Trump weed somewhere.
There of course there's Trump weed. There's probably Biden weed. But like it's.
We don't get you so high. You'll forget everything. Yeah.
Biden. Biden. Yeah. You'll forget you're president. Make you real sleepy.

(12:18):
Make you real sleepy. Very, very strong.
Indica. Yeah. But Kamala Harris, sleepy Joe. Yeah. Kamala Harris weed straight sativa. Straight sativa.
That shit will get you talking. It'll wake your ass up. You'll talk about everything.
Which is. It's got Adderall sprinkled over the top. A little Adderall sprinkled, which is great.
Which is kind of what I want in a president is I want that high energy, that cocaine energy that you get.

(12:42):
And then the Trump weed would just be like, I don't even know.
It'll make you see things. It'll make you feel great. Yeah.
Give you confidence. But it'll financially ruin you. Potentially. It's so expensive.
It's. And it'll be a five pack, but there will only be three in there.

(13:06):
For two hundred dollars. It'll promise you five. Yeah.
Well, we'll see what happens in the future. Maybe the five pack of Donald Trump weed will be better.
But but I hope like it's just going to be such a weird change.
Twenty years, ten years, however long it takes to be like, all right, I want to Marlboro when it's truly commercial.
Twenty pack. It's going to cost like, you know, however, however much.

(13:29):
And the thing, though, I'm afraid to bring the price down.
We'll bring the price down. Here's what I'm afraid of, though.
Right now, we have people who are trying to make the best quality stuff so that they stand out from the competition.
What happens when fucking Marlboro just is like, all right, here we go.
We have strong, light and medium. Start growing your own.
It'll well, no, they'll still be weed shops.

(13:51):
It will be it will be the equivalent of McDonald's or the chilies or whatever.
McDonald's versus a fancy restaurant.
It'll it'll just be you'll go to get what you want.
You might go to a weed store.
But when you're just out on the road going to do some, you might just grab a pack just to have Marlboro.
Or like you can go to you can go liquor store, get two bucks, chuck some wine or you can go to a winery and get one hundred eighty dollar bottle.

(14:16):
That's fire, fire quality. People took care of these grapes for a long time.
Well, that's if you believe in the. Yeah.
The sanctity of wine.
Don't get me wrong. I love to book. Chuck, that's it's good.
Yeah, I have I have wine.
I have I have bought some bottles of wine and I honestly said.
But I'm going to tell you, there is not a better wine than Mad Dog Strawberry Wine.

(14:43):
Mad Dog 2020 Strawberry is some good shit.
I don't know what anybody says.
I don't care what anyone says.
I don't even know that is that considered wine. It is, isn't it?
It's the boxed wine. Yeah, no, not boxed. It's the bottle.
Some boxed wine isn't bad.
I mean, I've had the thing is like most wine tastes the same to me.
Yeah, well, a lot of wine tastes the same.
But they you know what? They've debunked.

(15:05):
There's different ones like there's definitely drier wines.
Oh, no, there's different. Yeah.
Like whites and reds are definitely different.
Oh, I'm not saying every wine tastes the same.
I'm sorry. Like most red blends taste the same as most red blends.
Most Cabernet's taste the same.
Most Seminyon tastes the most or not.
I don't think so. Yeah. But the most.
What was going to say? The other one I've tried.
I mostly do reds. Yeah.

(15:27):
There's a huge difference between a Cabernet and a port.
Both reds. Sure. You know, ports going to be a lot more bitter,
a lot higher alcohol content. I just get a blend for the most part.
Yeah. Because Sherry cooking Sherry.
Yeah, that shit's strong. Strong.
It don't taste very good. But it's but like we were in Korea,
for example, in Korea when I was in Korea, we went to a strawberry farm

(15:49):
and they made their own strawberry wine. Oh, that's cool.
Oh, it was amazing. But you can't bring it over here. No.
I know my dad went to Greece.
He he brought back I think it's called Reiki is what he said it was called.
And it's basically like they take they take the grapes that they use
to squish to make the wine and they take those to their pulp

(16:12):
and they ferment that pulp into a hard liquor.
So it's like a vodka. I think I've heard of Reiki and it's close to
a man I hate when my brain does this. Don't get old people.
No, the Saki. It's like moon Saki.
Reiki and Saki are very similar. Yeah. It's like it was like moonshine.
It was strong, but it was delicious. Rice wine. Rice wine. Yeah.

(16:36):
We just make wine out of anything.
You're seeing strawberry wine. You think there's grape wine.
There's anything that ferments. Yeah.
After you make it technically, eventually like I think it's like high fruits
that you can ferment. Yeah.
A lot of sugar and wine. Yeah.
Like absolutely. Oh, probably one exists. Yeah.
Interesting. Does do apples for sangria wines.

(17:00):
Interesting. I've had sangria. Is that pomegranate wine?
I think sangria is sweet. Sangria is all a bunch of mixtures of fruit.
Yeah, it's sweet.
When I went to Running with the Bulls in Spain, Paplona,
they give you, well they don't give you, buy one, but sack these like
pouches you wear around your neck, full of sangria, and the people just,

(17:22):
you go to the party street and you just squirt it into each other's mouths
and get all fucked up. Wait, you get drunk at Nenro with the bulls?
Well, no, that's the party night. OK, it's a different day.
You wake up hungover the next day and then you stand in line with a bunch
of people way. Are you getting like a big run with the bulls hungover?
I did. I think that's even worse. It might be worse.
Well, no, the worst part was looking around and seeing that every person

(17:45):
there looked like they ran marathons for a living. They were all fucking
in the best shape of their life. I looked down at my gut and I was just like,
I'm going to die today because every one of them looks scared.
You're in flip flops. Yeah.
Luckily, I'm not a show my open my toes kind of guy. I had tennis shoes on.
That was yeah, that was scary. But that was our I guess.

(18:07):
What are we smoking? Yeah. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. I didn't say what I brought. You know, you mentioned the donut shop,
but I also brought some pre rolls from Claiborne Company.
These are called their banana OG liquid diamond infused and they're delicious.
Yeah. The buzzwords on the side here. Frosted diamond frosted terpene enhanced
premium indoor full nug flower infused with liquid diamonds.

(18:32):
I mean, this shit just sounds good. They know what they're doing.
When it comes to camels. Yeah. Yeah.
That's that's the equivalent of the little thing you break in the camel.
You know, the camel crush. Yeah. It could be like camel crush.
Well, I had that the other. Yeah. I'm thinking about we know I had those
the other week. I had joints that had the camel crush technology.

(18:53):
Those are good. Where you could change it from it was like cherry to cherry
vanilla or something. Yeah. Yeah.
Well, without further ado, let's jump into our Christmas movie
that we watched this week for no particular reason.
It's just a regular fried rice episode happened to cover Christmas.
That's going to release in December. And yeah.

(19:17):
So the Christmas Chronicles starring Kurt Russell, starring a couple of kids.
But Brendan just told me one of their Goldie Hawn son.
Fuck, I just forgot his name.
Something Russell. Why? No, not why?
Why didn't it? Oh, is he? I didn't notice him.

(19:38):
It was Goldie Hawn son Hudson. Last name Hudson. Yeah.
Oh, Oliver Hudson. Oliver Hudson. He was the dad. He's the dad.
Yeah, the dad. He's only in it for like two minutes at the beginning.
Yeah. My first note is this dad better not die. And then I put, damn it.
Did you find it odd how they never like would say the word died?

(20:00):
Yeah, but you could tell. I know. No, you can tell.
But it was interesting because they just avoided the word. Yeah.
Well, in the whole movie. In the whole movie, they kept saying they'd even go
up to the sentence to the point where you'd say died and they would stop.
Yeah. And dad. It was actually interesting. Yeah.
But that was a good choice. My first note was where dad go.
You go get cigarettes or milk?
Nope. He went into a burning fire, which leads. I mean,

(20:26):
I think that's what we led to believe. They don't really talk about.
Oh, did they talk about it at one point? I watched both movies.
So the second movie, they talk about it. Well, how he died. OK.
But yeah, yeah. I was like, the one thing I don't want spoilers for the second.
The first question you asked is like, yep, we're going to get some backstory on this.
Great. Because I'm only halfway through the second one.

(20:50):
Damn it. You already passed that point in the second one already.
Yeah, you should be. You are. Oh, that's beginning.
It's near the beginning. It's not the beginning, but it's in the first third of the movie.
Yeah, I got you. First act. I think I know what you're talking about.
So yeah, I put why are they OK, so we get the very cool.
I think it's a great way to open up a movie where it's all the different Christmases on video.

(21:13):
Kids growing up, great transitions. And then it's 2016 and they're still using the video camera.
And I was like, you know, I don't think they would.
I think at this point, someone to pull out a smartphone and start using that to record
because they'd be able to upload it to the cloud and share with their family.
Families are different. Families are different.
You know, sometimes it gets to that point where they want the sentimental videotapes.

(21:34):
Like, it's kind of it's cool to go back because like every now and again, I go to like we go to my parents' house
and we have a bunch of those tapes, you know, and so like we had to get the camera working to the TV
and like because the camera was breaking, so we had to fix it so we could watch the videos.
And it's kind of just a fun time rewatching old family videos.
And it comes from the dad who always wants to have everything videoed.

(21:56):
And then the daughter continues with that. It's like a family tradition. Yeah.
Yeah, no, I picked up on a lot of that.
But I think that at the same time, I know that you're talking about these wonderful memories where it's
like you're with your dad trying to figure out how to get the kids.
All of mine with my kids are on my phone. Exactly. Yeah.
And you can look at them at any time. Yes.
Although I need to get a computer to start transferring the files to delete. Yeah.

(22:18):
Yeah. I don't trust the cloud. No, yeah, I don't trust the cloud.
And especially like me, I have random pictures of like a delivery I'll make and they're not home.
When you leave it on the porch, I always take a picture, right?
And forget to delete it. And then I'll remember to delete it.
So like it's all like here's kids' pictures and then some porch with beats on it.
Kids, kids, kids, pizza.
You're really going into the Q conspiracy hard.

(22:42):
If in your phone is just pictures of children and pizza.
And pizza, yeah.
They're like, wait a minute. He ordered. Look at this.
It's a pepperoni will get you two white kids.
Yeah.
And then I do think that one of the sweetest moments is right up at the top where the brother is about to fuck up her entire world by saying Santa Claus doesn't exist.

(23:10):
But instead he goes, oh, you still he's just like, oh, my God, I can't believe that you don't.
And then he thinks about it for a second. He goes like, no, that you're never going to hang out with me or something like that.
Like he's still a jerk. He says something.
Good job, though, of that of that brother sister relationship, how they're fighting, but yet they still you can let each other care about each other.

(23:31):
Yeah, they care about each other. But holy shit, he's a bad kid.
He's really on that naughty list, bro.
Stealing a car.
She's the worst little spy because she's literally running around with a giant cam camcorder in 2016.
So she'd be the most obvious person in the fucking world.

(23:53):
But her target still didn't notice her. So that's OK.
Yeah, he's even more oblivious. Yeah, she did good.
It's a sad, hard family to watch, like in the beginning when they're all interacting with each other and the house isn't decorated and dad is dead and everything's just bad and they hate each other.
And it's just not good. And I hope something changes this to make it better.

(24:15):
And I put main girl is sympathetic. I don't want anything bad to happen to her because there's a moment where she like something.
I think the mom or the daughter, the daughter, I was something like the daughter.
I think the brother says something to her and I was like, hurt her.
Like she's a sweet kid. She just wants her dad just died. She just wants the family to get together.
She just wants Christmas. The mom I could tell was like exasperated or like exhausted and stuff.

(24:38):
So it's just like, what are you going to do? And I put, this brother needs to die. That's harsh as fuck.
I put that I put I know that's harsh. I know. But fuck that guy. What did he say?
I don't remember. Who knows? What did he say? It was mean as fuck though.
They set him up in the beginning. Yeah, it was like super mean. It's like, I don't care about you.

(24:59):
Yeah, I'm like, dad doesn't look at this. That's gone. Pretty much. It's not coming back.
That's gone. And I don't want to be your friend. You little stupid.
It was the nickname thing. Like, don't call me. Oh, yeah. I told you not to call me.
You're not my little kitty cat anymore. We're older. Grow up. Yeah.
I'm a kitty cat. There we go. Well, the part that really got me was when she stuck her hand on the picture of dad and swear like that.

(25:25):
I don't know why, but just like, damn, like other dead dad. Yeah, I was like, damn, that's all right.
Yeah. Oh, I think it's because he's told. Well, he's he's basically they're making the deal for, you know,
help me capture Santa on film because that's after the she notices Santa's arm or whatever it was.
And, you know, it's really bothering me that you two did watch the second movie now because so much of it's tied in.

(25:51):
Yeah, I can tell you it's very in the beginning.
Like, as soon as Santa's there and they get into the sleigh, I'm like, OK, Santa, this is set up.
Like he was planning it like I picked that part immediately. And you get it at the end of one. Oh, that Santa played all.
Yeah, he planned it all. He took the letter that the kid wrote to do anything he wants.
What you find out through this movie. Now, my here's the crazy thing is that why does Santa care so much about these two kids is kind of weird.

(26:19):
It's like I think it's just because not just these two kids.
Once again, the second movie every kid has their own experience.
Just a side note about our podcast history of it is normally Mike fucking hates every single time we've ever said to watch more than one movie in a week.
If it's like a movie and it's sequel, we fuck.

(26:41):
But you've trained us to watch to you've trained us now. And Andy, you didn't do it.
So this week we just had one movie to watch.
He watches to fucking hates us for not watching it.
The irony. I don't know what I can do to this.
Mike, you always find a way to do something.
Christmas Diaries and watch that to the Christmas Diaries.

(27:04):
Yeah, Jesus.
So I do like that she found Santa on her video camera, saw the arm.
That was cool. She makes a deal with the brother because he gets stuck having to watch her.
And that's probably what he says. Something mean or whatever.
She's like, let's find Santa will do it. It'll be fun.
We'll sleep over. We'll stay up all night.
And they're eating junk food and they fall asleep.

(27:26):
Of course. Yeah. Classic cliche.
So Kurt Russell that are Santa Claus, he purposely jingles the bells to wake him up.
He purpose. So that kind of any purposely steps in the dust.
So it's like he's amazing. I'm sorry. Kurt Russell in this is amazing.
He's really good. He plays Santa Claus.
He's like he just stepped out of a biker bar after three whiskey.

(27:47):
He's like, yeah, he's great. He's like a jubilant like he's jolly.
Yeah, he's jolly. Yeah. He's a little bit drunk.
He's super happy to be there. He's just having a good time.
I like everyone's everyone's name and deepest, darkest secrets.
Yeah, I like that kind of what fat man.
A little bit of that vibe. Yeah.

(28:09):
What I love when they're getting ready, setting everything up,
like a little blindfold over the elf on the shelf.
Yeah, that was one of the that's just a little.
It's that. Oh, she runs up.
She puts a little blindfold over the elf on the shelf as they're saying.
Don't watch. That's great. Which is super great.
And I was like, dude, drilling holes out of the fucking wall to catch Santa.

(28:33):
Dude, this brother went all out to help out his little sister.
That's like a step above that.
He's going to get serious trouble from the mob.
He's rebellious right now anyway. So it's like, let's go.
Let's just send it. I stole a car earlier today.
But why not? Why the fuck not?
He's got adrenaline.
You know where that car is in the bottom of the lake.
It's somewhere. I don't know.

(28:54):
Now, keep in mind, the girl and the brother have not left.
When they're setting up for their sleepover, she says, Mom said no junk food.
He's walking in with two tubs of ice cream and there's a shitload of chips.
This family be junk fooded all the time.
It felt like Mom's doing extra stuff like that because of Dad being gone.

(29:19):
It's kind of how it felt. Getting more sweets.
Yeah. It's like I'm going to give you this extra stuff I would normally do.
Or that's Mom's junk food because she's sad.
But two things of ice cream, the same ice cream.
They were the same kind? I think they were the same ice cream.
No, that's just realistic. Don't you always have two of the same?
Because every time I go to the store, if it's on, it's two for five or whatever.

(29:40):
Well, I get two of the same brand, but I get different like a variety.
Yeah. Yeah.
Plus, my wife likes different flavors than I do.
If I get an ice cream, it's usually a bed of Jerry's.
Yeah, or that one person size.
But they're two for five. Those are usually like a sale.
The other one will stay in the freezer, you know?
Yeah. It's ice cream.
Guys, I'm not an idiot. I only play one on this podcast.

(30:04):
So.
Then why did you say you only buy one?
Sometimes I don't see the deal, apparently.
At Walmart, it's not two for five.
No, Walmart doesn't do sales.
Walmart doesn't do that kind of stuff.
So you almost always shop at Walmart.
I usually almost never go to Walmart for groceries because it's cheaper.
Yeah, Smith's are a safe way.

(30:26):
Actually, I'm going to start going to Sam's, though.
Is it cheaper there?
Sam's just cheaper.
Cheaper as long as you're willing to buy a thousand or something.
Yeah, buy a bulk plan meals ahead of time, things like that.
You know what? No, actually, I go to Walmart, I kind of buy in bulk.
So I might as well just go to Sam's and buy in bulk.
Yeah.
Because there's really only like five things I need.
Food. I need napkins.

(30:47):
I need like paper towels, toilet paper, water, and then some basic food stocks.
Well, like we bought a case of macaroni and cheese yesterday.
Yeah.
Just a big ass case.
Big ass case. Grandkids are eating.
That's what they're eating.
Oh, yeah.
I try to like get a little bit zombie apocalypse prepared.
Like hold myself over for a week, you know, in case a disaster hits.

(31:11):
Only a week?
That's all.
Not more, man. Jesus.
That's all you're going to last?
Yeah.
You don't think you're going to last longer than a week after the apocalypse?
If I haven't found a group of survivors that enjoy a good story.
You can come to my house.
I've got I've got months for you, I'm sure.
Sure.
Whenever I got a lie and tell you whatever religion or politics or political affiliation,

(31:37):
that your group is 100 percent mad.
Well, no, no, no, but I'm just saying if, for instance, for instance, if I make it out in the world
and I see a roaming group of like Baptist, Satanists or not, that would be kind of Baptist, Baptist independents.
I'd be like, all right, let's do this. I want guns in every hand.
And you remember your can opener yesterday. That's where we should all go.

(32:00):
It was my daughter's house.
Oh, sure. Because he's got he looks like. Oh, yeah.
Well, that's zombie apocalypse. I'm talking like, let's say, uh, hurricane.
We don't get hurricanes here. Earthquake.
Well, we don't really get earthquakes.
Earthquakes get that bad.
What is our natural flood?
Yeah, monsoon. Yeah, if the dam goes down.

(32:22):
If the dam. Yeah. So if we got flooded, would you be an earthquake to?
Yeah. Yeah. We that's that would destroy our city.
If that happened, well, then I guess I would leave.
I wouldn't even need to have stuff stockpiled.
The next city down will be fine. Yeah. So we're good.
Or up. We have to go to Kingman. Yeah. Yeah. No words.
So Blair Witch Santa Project at one point where she picks up her phone and starts

(32:48):
the camera and starts following the tracks or whatever.
And then she jumps on the sleigh. They see the sleigh outside.
She jumps up there. He jumps and hangs off the side.
And then this eight year old girl grabs him one arm lifts her 16 year old brother up into the car.
Most unbelievable. There had to be Christmas magic involved. Yeah.

(33:11):
In that little that little thing. You have a note? What was yours?
I didn't have anything for that part. We were talking about Christmas magic and this stuff.
It's so funny because you almost forgive everything that is weird about this movie.
Usually we're like like I was trying to do notes as I was going. Yeah.
And I couldn't do it. Yeah. Because everything in this movie that is weird is explainable with Christmas.

(33:32):
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It really is like the whole. Yeah.
The whole jail. I literally watched this movie.
They take one note. Usually I got a whole page and a half or two pages.
I took all that. That's a mess. That's a mess. Nope. Not in there.
There's not everything that they do that's odd. It's just explainable by oh Santa did that.
And you know they just they do it over and over again.
I like it. What were you saying with the jail scene?

(33:56):
Like the whole jail scene like when all of a sudden. Yeah.
They all have you know instruments and dresses and. Yeah. Yeah. Out of his shirt. Yeah.
It's great. And I of course at the end we find out that like everything he did was planned. Yes. Right.
And he never needed the bag. He didn't need the hat. He didn't need the hat.
And it does when you I guess on a rewatch if you were to rewatch this which I will probably next year.

(34:19):
It's going to be interesting knowing if you watch it from the perspective everything Santa's doing is intentional.
Yeah. Right. So the way he's acting it's almost like he's faking surprise.
It's like he's faking the like and all the people he touches along the way.
So for instance the one cop the one that does see the reindeer fly away.

(34:40):
Yeah. It starts telling people that he saw the reindeer fly away.
Turn around. Turn around. Turn around. Turn around. Turn around.
Wait what? Son of a bitch.
And he at the jail though after the other cop sees that Santa is real for some reason the dude goes I quit.
And he leaves. Yeah. Why quit being a police officer over there?

(35:02):
Because nobody believes me. I'm out. I'm done.
I hope that was a playful I quit and left. Yeah. Not like I quit. I'm going home.
Legit when they started flying off and they're hiding in the back and he picks up speed and she flings off the sled.
That was legit kind of frightening because it's like holy shit she fell fast.
It wasn't like a normal movie fall. It was like she had sucked into the fucking.

(35:27):
No actually one of my notes was about how good the special effects in that song is there.
Listen this has better special effects than a lot of the high budget action movies.
Yeah that's true. Really does.
The only thing that I will say special effects wise doesn't even hold up now.
Won't hold up in the future. The sequel doesn't quite hold up too well are the elves.

(35:52):
Oh I disagree 100%.
Just hear me out. They kind of like the Smurfs. Yeah.
They're we're just not where we need to be graphically yet.
What I want so like they look they don't look like they're part of the same world as Santa.
They still look like their computer animated little dudes right running around and I don't know how to fix that yet.

(36:18):
I didn't really feel that. No no no. Trust me.
Because I think it's because you always talk about this that you're able to do it and I'm usually not.
But this movie because of the Christmas magic aspect of it. Yeah.
Let me suspend disbelief. Most movies don't. This movie did. Those elves just look like they belong there.

(36:40):
And I guess it's I will say that probably a lot of the set was also CGI.
So it's easy to blend CGI characters into CGI environments especially the sequel.
We go to the village. Oh the village.
And you see absolutely all of that. They look like they live in their environment.
But there's almost there's like we haven't got to the point where it does a little tiny uncanny valley kind of feeling to it.

(37:04):
I get what you're saying. But you're going to have that in any.
I don't think you'll ever get CGI to that point because I disagree.
Just because let's look at life frame. Roger Rabbit. Look at life of pie.
They didn't actually have a tiger tiger on the boat with him.
But but didn't they have real like shots of that tiger on the boat and then they just they just kind of went over the time.

(37:29):
Yeah. They also CGI some stuff too.
But like the thing is that they blended those things together.
There's no reason that they couldn't do that with like elves or whatever.
Like they could have. But I think it's just hard to make a something that you're making not look human like human.
Like you're making something that doesn't look real.
It's kind of harder to do that versus something that's not in reality, you know, to make it look real.

(37:54):
Exists. You're going to always get a little bit of that feeling because elves don't exist.
Yeah. Yeah. They look like well, they look like Zootopia characters.
They look like they look like gerbils dressed up.
They kind of look like you know, like anthropomorphized turtles.
Right. Or not turtles. Turtles.
I just I didn't expect them to be as small as they were.

(38:17):
Yeah, that's it. Like they were talking about. I didn't expect tiny little guy.
Yeah. In fact, she goes into the sack.
Yeah. And that was cool. That was cool.
I didn't expect them to be, you know, six inches tall. I expected them to be three feet tall or whatever.
And I like that they speak kind of German.
I'm not sure what that was. Well, it's like Scandinavian almost.
It is. Maybe Turkish. Yeah.
It's like a blend of Scandinavian, German and like a few other languages probably.

(38:41):
Yeah. It's cool, though. I like it. I like that she picks it up.
And how she starts speaking it. Yeah.
The quantum. So I put down quantum teleportation, which is kind of the vibe that I've been saying the last few weeks of how Santa would work is by folding time and space in on itself.
It does work as far as getting the city to city. Yeah.
Yeah. He folds time and space to get city to city.
But I also think he's folding time and space to get into chimneys and stuff. Right.

(39:05):
They literally showed it. Well, they show him. They show magical pixie dust going in and out of each one.
Yeah. Yeah. He turns himself into dust.
Yeah. But I will say that, of course, we know that if he went at the pace that we watched this movie go at, it wouldn't.
And what was this like? In what world would you need to jump?

(39:28):
Why do you even need that the ability to jump from country to country other than when you need to cross the ocean?
Because what would happen is like you start in you start on the east coast of a country and then you would work your way up and down.
You would do this all the way up, up and down, up and down, up and down all the way across the country.
Yeah. But they but no, the way they did it was like he did their neighborhood.

(39:52):
Then they dipped over to he was going to dip over to Egypt and do some shit.
He was going to dip over to France and drop some presents off when they actually did it.
They didn't. If you watch the little thing that was on his dash, it literally went New York.
Yeah, it was East Coast to West Coast. It went across in the order of the time zone.
Yeah. That would make more sense. It made sense. Yeah.

(40:13):
Maybe he was just doing it more sporadically earlier in the night because he was like, fuck it, I'm having fun.
Yeah, because he's not in a hurry originally. Yeah, it was part of his three wisdoms deep biker bar Santa.
Yeah. Planning, I'm fucking with the kids. So he's just having fun. Yeah, he's having fun.
OK. Let's show them what this can do. Yeah.
So this is a gnarly sleigh crash. But why in every movie when there's a crash, does it always happen where the people get knocked out with zero injuries?

(40:38):
They lay on the floor completely unconscious for about two seconds and then they wake up and they're like confused as to where they are.
Christmas magic. Christmas magic. CTE. Yeah, CTE. Yeah. Christmas. Yeah.
This is fucking Christmas Christmas. This is dramatic. Yeah. I just feel like in this movie, like going back to what I was saying, a lot of the oddball stuff like that, you're like it just leans into.

(41:03):
What I said, it knows not to take itself too seriously. Yeah. It's like it knows it's a ridiculous premise and it just leans into it. It just has fun. Yeah, it does.
I like when he the bar scene. Oh, yeah. When he's talking to the hostess and everyone like all these different people. Just go away. Stop talking to me.

(41:24):
And I speak English, asshole. Like, yeah, that was the jail scene. Like going back to the jail scene. Jesus.
Stephen Vans and ask you. Yeah, it was the whole whole band. Yeah, it was great. Oh, is that who that was?
It was the East Street band. It's like Bruce Springsteen's band. I was surprised Bruce Springsteen wasn't in it. Yeah. Well, because now it's like every member of the band was that's pretty.

(41:45):
I didn't know that. Now it's now it's the backup singer. Stephen Vans and band now. Well, they still know he still plays with they still play with Bruce. Really?
I didn't know that. He has his own band as well. Yeah.
That talk about somebody who Stephen Vans and he's been a lot. Yeah, he's been a lot. That's a busy guy. And soprano is a busy guy. The one that I never finished was the show that he did.

(42:09):
It was a Netflix original. Yeah, it's great. Oh, yeah. What's it called? It's the city. He goes to somewhere in Scandinavia, I think. Right. Yeah.
It's like Sweden. Yeah. He moves over like he's like a he's a mob guy. He's a mob guy who leaves the country and goes to Scandinavia to start over.
Witness protection program. It's actually really good. It was like the first Netflix original. What was it called? Oh, wait. It was like Wonder Lel or something.

(42:31):
It's something like that. I know exactly because it was one of the Netflix original. I don't I can't I can't pull that one out.
Came out right around the same time as Marco Polo. My art, my autism isn't that strong. It'll get there. Yeah.
The stealing the car logic is pretty great that the car was already stolen. So they're stealing the car. They're just going to turn it after. Yeah, that was great.

(42:56):
The dude that they piss off, the bartender guy, he was going to kill that valet. Yeah.
Well, that when he when the when the valet says, don't worry, I reported it stolen. He's like, you did what? And he holds up like a crowbar or something. He's about to kill that guy.
Yeah. We cut away from violence. That guy beat that dude with a crowbar. I bet that was a violent bloody scene where they're like, I don't know, some dude came in.

(43:19):
He knew all of our names. He spoke a bunch of different languages. He stole this dude's car, but it was already stolen. He killed our valet.
Oh, it's a tragic Christmas Eve. I never want to see or think about Santa ever again. That poor girl, that poor hostess. I was going to give him money. He was so persuasive.
Yeah. She has to go to therapy for that. She's about to give them all her tips. I'm a hostess. I don't make much money.

(43:46):
Here you go. It helps. No. So when Santa's going through the glove box and why do they still call it a glove box, by the way, we don't keep our gloves in there anymore.
There's no way that he's not accidentally tossing some cocaine in the backseat to that little girl.
Well, there's got to be. Yeah. Yeah. He's going through a criminal's glove box. It's got to be tossing shit in the backseat.

(44:10):
She just picked up a little bag of cocaine at some point. That's what honestly when he when he had the foil wrapped around the thing, I was like, like when he first started opening it, he was going to smoke crack.
Santa about the free base right now. What the fuck? Don't worry, kids. I know how to get us home. It's a dark turn.

(44:34):
But yeah, why do we call it a glove box? I mean, it's because of the gloves in there. But yeah, we shouldn't anymore. Should we call the like the utility box? Is there a reason why we don't put our gloves?
It's because we live in the desert. Other people still put their gloves in the glove box. Do you have gloves? No.
I don't even own any gloves. Hold on. But actually, I don't even think it's for those kind of gloves. I don't think it's cold weather gloves. I think it's driving gloves. Yeah, we don't need. No one has driving gloves anymore.

(44:57):
No, we don't need. No one wears driving gloves. You're saying I'm telling you people on the East Coast where it's cold still have gloves. They keep in the car for when the steering wheel.
I agree that there's cold weather gloves in cold weather places in their glove compartments. I'm not even under glove boxes. I'm not even arguing that. It's probably more because like back in the day, like weren't steering wheels like metal and you didn't have air conditioners.

(45:23):
I think they might have been wood. Were they wood? Oh, that might be it too. Yeah, because they weren't making it out of rubber and plastic. Yeah, they're not the same as they are now. Like now they're yeah, they don't get as hot or I mean they do, but they'll cool off quick because you're AC.
Do you imagine being one of those sad sacks that's like my favorite time period was the 1940s and the 50s. I think I grew up in the wrong decade. No, fuck you. You didn't. Do you want to use a wooden steering wheel and have to wear gloves and then go throw your shit off the fucking?

(45:54):
I don't even know if we had toilets back then. We probably did. When did we stop throwing your shit off the side of our roofs into the alleyways? Yeah, yeah, no, I know. What else were they going to do? They didn't know.
They used to do stuff like you'll see an old movie. You'll see the bathtub that they go pay 10 cents to bathe in. Yeah, it's gross. And then they don't change the water for the next person. It's like once a week they change the water. I bet if you paid an extra nickel, they change the water. I don't know.

(46:25):
I would be that guy that would spend a whole extra days worth of work to not use someone else's water. Public bathhouses in Rome, could you imagine? Is that still a thing in certain countries? It still exists.
Like in Japan. I think it exists in San Francisco, but it's a whole different thing. Isn't a big thing in Japan as public bathhouses? Yeah, that's what I thought. Now, if it was co-ed. I don't know if they have co-ed ones, but I think they're all segregated by gender.

(46:58):
Yeah, by gender. I don't like segregation. Unless it's by gender. Kurt Russell is amazing in this. I put that. That was my note. I put Kurt Russell's great. I don't know what he was doing exactly.
I watched an interview with him. He based his Santa on Elvis Presley and his own father, Bing Russell, which explains why he looks like he could headline a rock concert and picture a car transmission.

(47:29):
Yeah. Yeah, that's good. He said that? He said that last bar with the church. Oh, yeah, that's good. That's good. I'm not crying, I put, for the church scene where the brother and sister are outside the church and they're finally talking about dad.
Dad's favorite song. Dad's favorite song, Christmas Tree. And then, uh. Haven't been in since. And then they stop. And then she's like, I saw your letter to dad, what were you trying to, I saw your letter to Santa, what were you going to say?

(48:03):
Right? Didn't she say that at that point or whatever? And then he's like, why would you blah, blah, blah, blah. He gets mad. No, no, no, no, she wasn't there yet, was she? She what? No. Did she already go to the, no.
No, I don't think she already. That was towards the end. Because right after I put it, when she goes into the bag. Yeah. So this was right before she goes back. She hasn't seen the letter yet. Okay. So this is like she's, but maybe he. They're just sad about dad. Yeah.

(48:31):
Because that was after they flew on the reindeer and landed close to the bag and were looking for the bag. But did he mentioned earlier when they were talking, did he say like, I just want to tell dad, never mind. And then left? Yes. Was that part of it? Yes, that was part of it. So she was aware at least.
And then when she picks up the letter, she starts to be like, I always wanted to tell dad. And then like it gets interrupted. Well, it's not that it gets interrupted. That's more of the point where they try not to talk about him being dead. It's like they're there between even between each other avoiding talking about.

(49:02):
Yeah, it's kind of what they're trying to show. They're still kind of in the denial phase of denial about dad being not coming back. They're showing that like it was fairly recent that that died. Like it was within the year. Like this is their first Christmas without that. Yeah.
My dad would have had this decorated. So there's little things throughout the movie that are like statements of missing dad without saying. Yeah, it's my dad's birthday today. Yeah. And I called him and I was like, you made it to your seventies. You know, congrats.

(49:33):
Every year's a victory. He's like, what? Yeah, I know. I'm thinking about that. It's like I'm close to, you know, thanks for reminding me. I'm on my last. Like, yeah. And I was just like, well, no, it's just, you know, it's it's good that you.
And he's just like, thanks for cheering me up, son. That was our conversation. Love you, dad. That's why I come here every week. Yeah. And he cheers you up.

(50:00):
Oh, man. Oh, so here's something interesting. When she goes into the bag, she sees a Porsche. Yeah. Full bicycle and then also a wooden toy car. A cheap robot toy. Yeah. Every kids do whatever they ask for. Yeah.
So, who gets what? Who determines what? No, OK. It's what you ask. I understand what you ask. Who gets a Porsche? Who gets a Porsche? Yeah, who gets the full Porsche? Jason's wife who's a true believer. Got it.

(50:32):
How does she account for the porch like a Porsche? Like, OK, a wooden toy. Brendan forgot he bought it for his kids. Yeah, it's underneath. It says from Santa. Yeah, they're true believers. So they truly believe in Santa. Santa is real in this world. You have to go back to the once again suspending disbelief part of it. Yeah. You're looking at it from the perspective of a parent in it or whatever. No, not in this. You wholeheartedly believe Santa is real. Yeah. There is no moms doing it and putting Santa on it. When they get to the house at the end.

(51:02):
Those presents came from Santa, not from mom. Yeah. OK, so in this world, if you wake up and you have a gift from Santa, you believe wholeheartedly in Santa. There'd be a lot more true believers. You don't just believe it. It is. But there'd be a lot more true believer parents. If you're a true believer. If you're not a true believer, it's not. But if Brendan went downstairs. If I wasn't a true believer, I wouldn't have that. He wouldn't have that. But his kids are true believers is what I'm saying. If his. I'm just saying. If I taught my kids. But if I never believed what I was saying,

(51:32):
how would I teach my kids to be true believers? Because they're children. They always believe that stuff.
Yeah, they do and they don't. They're still like, it doesn't make sense.
They don't really believe. Yeah, they're like, kids are cynical. Yeah.
That's even even your youngest doesn't believe in Santa.
Well, we have they're not sure is what. Yeah. Like we talk about it and we like.
So what we do is like our Santa gift is going to be is one stocking and one gift from Santa.

(51:56):
The rest is from us. You know, Santa tells us what you want.
Like this is like the first year they're actually going to see Santa
because we're going to Flagstaff to Santa's village, taking the train ride and all that stuff.
We're excited about it. That's fun.
My youngest is excited about it.
My middle child is like, I want to stay home.
It's like, no, we're going, dude. Like we're all going.
Like he's fun. He doesn't believe.

(52:17):
Well, he just he he gets anxiety about scared.
He gets anxiety about the unknown.
You're scared of him. Yeah.
He gets anxiety. Like when we went to Universal Studios, he was like,
I don't want to wait in this line. Like, I don't want to do the ride.
It's like it's going to be fun. Like you're going to have fun.
He's like, no, I don't want to.
Like, so he gets anxiety just waiting for things because
yeah, it's like he's already you know what it is.

(52:39):
If there was no light at all, you can maybe convince him.
Probably like, hey, let's just get on this cool ride.
Yeah. But it's the waiting and the pressure building up.
Yeah. And he gets anxious.
He's like, no, don't want to do it.
My granddaughter would never sit on Santa's lap ever. Yeah.
I think like once we go and do it, he'll kind of get into it.
Like because it like medieval times, my parents took him.

(53:00):
He had a little freak out beforehand.
But once they got in there and started doing it, he was like he loved it.
You know. Yeah.
I mean, but Santa's village, that's like that's epic.
Yeah. Candy and hot chocolate.
It's going to be their first time seeing snow.
Like it's going to be it's going to be a lot of cool shit.
Like I remember going to the Santa's village somewhere in California.

(53:21):
I forgot the big bear. Yeah.
Uh, really fun, really fun Santa's village.
Yeah. When I watched this, I really thought that somebody could build this.
Yeah. His village and make a fortune.
Oh, the second one. Yeah.
There's a he's he's now he's now across.
He's he doesn't know what's happening.
Yeah. He doesn't know which which one he's in right now.

(53:44):
Elves. I put the elves are cute.
I'm not against the elves in these movies. I like them.
They're better than minions.
They have more autonomy. They talk to each other.
They actually you're in the second one.
You know, they have a lot of autonomy.
That's what I say. Yeah.
If you look at the second one, they have a whole community.
It's like really cool. But but yeah, I would say the the elf.

(54:05):
The elves are cool.
I like them. They don't annoy me.
But there's a disconnect.
It's the same I get from watching Roger Rabbit.
Like whoever mentioned that early, because he read my brain
when I was thinking about it.
But it's not just Roger Rabbit.
It's pretty much any of those any of those movies.
Like the combined the chipmunks movies, whatever.
Yeah. Yeah. We haven't perfected that yet.

(54:27):
There's sure we can is what I'm saying, because they're anamorphic.
I don't animal.
No, I think the way you do it
is something like the remake of The Jungle Book, where were the real things.
You make the animals and shit look real as fuck.
And then you didn't believe David Hasselhoff
was really hanging out with SpongeBob in the first SpongeBob movie.

(54:49):
That was pretty legit.
I forgot all about that.
But it was the best.
I don't think it's going to get any better than that, man.
I think that if you make it, the creatures look more real.
You can suspend disbelief a little more maybe.
But when they look like these, like little hamster guys or whatever,

(55:11):
obviously you're going to know they're fake.
Automatically, your subconscious is going to know there's no way it's in the sea.
That's impossible.
So the Lion King remake and now Mufasa is coming out.
Right. The Mufasa.
Those look great.
Yeah, because they all self-contained like the whole movies CGI.
I don't think they also are a meerkat or they are a lion.

(55:34):
Yeah, they are. It's a real.
Yes. It's not a real animal.
So your subconscious is never going to let you think that SpongeBob is real.
Yeah. Speaking of Mufasa,
do you think we're going to get the origin of Tomo and Puma?
I don't know.
Well, I'm going to a different movie.
It's Disney. They got to find a way to make more money.
It's probably a different movie.
Yeah, maybe. But like they'll do it.

(55:54):
They'll do a remake of the Lion King one and a half.
Wow. Well, yeah, they could remake two. Yeah.
And one and a half. Fuck.
They could do all of those movies with this technology.
Yeah, right. They have all the assets for it.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
It'll be way easier to make the second. Are they still doing Snow White?
I think so. Yes, there's a lot of action.

(56:16):
They're still doing Snow White.
What? But they went this they went with CGI dwarves.
There's a lot of. Officially at the very end.
It was they had they had little people as the dwarves.
And then they went with then they changed it to
seven different people altogether
of varying sizes, which pissed people off.

(56:38):
So there weren't just all little people.
There was also like full grown people.
But then what also pissed people off was that there was one trans dwarf.
I think no matter what, no matter what somebody's going to be mad.
No matter what you do. Exactly.
Yeah. No matter what they have, they harped on the most.
I mean, Willy Wonka just recently had a huge as person playing a dwarf.

(56:59):
Yeah. Was it Hugh Grant or it was it was Hugh?
Yeah, she was great. Yeah.
You great. He which I thought he did great.
I mean, just made people mad for some stupid reason. Yeah.
Come on. It's not the real world, people.
Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't matter.
And he was he was the only talking about what's the one that's out now, Wicked.
And it's because it's a black lady.

(57:20):
They're like, listen, it doesn't matter. These aren't real people.
Well, first off, first off, Wicked, I think the green chick
should be played by a black chick because I agree with you.
Because of the political tone, I don't think there are matters.
There's a political overtones like the political not even overtones.
No, they're like straight up in your face.
Yeah. Skin color is makes her different.

(57:40):
Right. Like why not have a black chick player?
I agree. I don't know why people are mad about that. Yeah.
Oh, because the original green witch was a white chick in the in the Broadway play.
Oh, and the Wizard of Oz. Wizard of Oz.
No, that's all it takes.
Yeah, the fact that for these people, that's what we're saying.
The fact that the that the Norway

(58:01):
Little Mermaid story was adapted by Disney and made her into a redheaded white chick.
The fact that they wanted to do it again and make her a chick of color,
a black chick that piss people off. Right.
Yeah. Because that made up Little Mermaid is, you know, a freaking mermaid.
Who cares? That's the point. It's a freaking fish lady. Yeah.
They're also pissed off that Snow White isn't a Caucasian chick.

(58:22):
She's one of my Latina.
One of my hair's closest friends, one of my best friends.
His daughter is like mixed race. Right. Looks darker.
She loved the Little Mermaid. Oh, I imagine. Yeah, she loved it.
That she was like, I think that's great. Yeah.
I don't care what color the Little Mermaid is.
It's a freaking little mermaid. Yeah. I don't care what color.

(58:43):
I'm not going to watch it regardless.
I'm a grown man and I don't watch Disney princess movies.
We don't go on Twitter and bitch about it. Yeah, exactly.
If I had if I had daughters. Yeah, I would.
But my son without forced to watch.
Like tonight, my kids like other stuff tonight.
The three movie choices because my buddy, Shawn's in town

(59:04):
is a red one.
Moana, too, or wicked.
And I'm OK with all three seeing it with some friends.
I wouldn't go see any either three on my own.
Those are interesting choices. Does he have children?
No, that's just out. He has a wife.

(59:25):
OK, that's just what's all.
You don't understand how lives work.
Am I wrong in this or is your wife also?
Watch she watches, you know, the Disney movies and stuff.
You also have kids. Yeah, we have kids. Exactly.
So like we would take kids to see Moana.
She wants she does want to see want to see it.
I also want to see it, too.
But I like I like Moana.
Me and my wife are going to watch the the Satan Santa movie tonight.

(59:48):
So that's on stream. Jack Black.
Yeah, I know. But I'm just saying if we're going to a movie,
we wouldn't go see any of those.
I was going to see Red One. Red One looks funny.
That's the rock one.
The red one. Red one. One.
No, that's what I'm saying. Transformers one. Yeah.
That's what I would go see. Yeah. We saw that.
I know. But I'm saying me and my wife would go.
We were just talking about women and their choices and they're not all the same.

(01:00:10):
Was all I was trying to do.
Oh, really, Mike? Not all women are the same.
Don't generalize.
You're blowing my mind right now.
Are you? Of course not.
I look. Here's the thing.
I think as millennials.
There's a certain Gen X is different.
Way different because here's the thing, like boomers,

(01:00:31):
when it comes to like their nostalgia,
their nostalgia is just remembering like the general vibe of the time, right?
They maybe they'll read a book from when they were younger or whatever.
Gen X, you're not sitting around eating cereal, watching He-Man reruns
because they were they were popular when you were younger.
You're not watching old G.I.
Joe's or whatever. What? I'm watching the new He-Man.

(01:00:54):
No, no, because but you're what I'm saying is you are.
Focus on new content. That's fine.
Millennials, a lot of us are stuck in that 90s.
Whatever we watch, old content all the time.
Right. And so what we're talking about, because I'm super stoked right now.
What was it? What's my argument?
These movie choices.

(01:01:14):
And you said it was because of his wife.
But I'm like, I don't know.
So Moana, too, is a sequel to something that's to Moana.
From long enough ago, of course, I watched it with the probably
I like Moana one. Right. Yeah.
Moana one. I know I said I'm not a Disney Princess fan or whatever,
but like Moana one is was fun.
And I had to watch it. It was on my TV.

(01:01:34):
But my grandchild, I have a friend that sings the rock song
when we go to karaoke.
The You're Welcome song. Yeah.
Yeah. And but I don't know if I I'd rather just wait for that streaming.
Yeah, Moana, too. Yeah, that's why I'll watch it.
I'll watch it when it streams on Disney.
So we're going to watch Red One.
But the other option, Wicked, because it's so popular,
and I have a friend who keeps blowing my phone up,

(01:01:56):
being like, you should go see Wicked.
It's so good.
Plus, Wicked, shout out to my friend Christopher Scott,
because Christopher Scott is the choreographer for Wicked.
Yeah, that was actually I knew why you were with Wicked would be one of your choices.
It was more the Moana that it wasn't true.
Yeah, because Wicked, I understand because I know about your friends.

(01:02:18):
But and Wicked, there's only one reason I'm not going to go see Wicked.
And that's because and this is just me.
I hate when they tell me the advance movie split in two.
And I'm going to have to wait two years to see the other part of it.
It's split into two.
So it's like it's only part one of Wicked.
Yes. Wow, that's kind of great.
Or are they going more?

(01:02:38):
I think it was like a three hour play.
So I understand it's going to be two, two hour movie.
I didn't realize it was a three hour play.
Yeah. But you can also just read the book.
You want the ending. That's true.
Because the books all know I want the whole story.
So yeah, but then I'll wait and I'll watch it on streaming.
And then I'll probably go see Wicked two in theaters if I like Wicked one.
But what I'm saying, Michael, is you could read the book now before seeing Wicked.

(01:03:01):
I've seen the stage. So am I.
But I'm saying you can read the book to get the full because even the stage play had to edit from the book.
So read the book, which is what the stage plays based on and what the movie is based on.
And then it's probably better than all of it.
I'm sure I haven't read it. I haven't read the book yet.
But I've heard good things about it.
What I'm saying is you read the book, you get the whole dump of the story,

(01:03:23):
then just go watch the movie in the theater because then you get the big screen experience knowing.
Yeah, you'll have to wait two years to get the second half of it.
But at least you you're not hanging on a cliff like everyone else is who refuses to read the book or watch the play.
There's ways around it where it's like you can fix the part.
I don't mean the hanging on the cliff part. It's just the whole enjoyment of it.
I can't tell you how happy I was to go right into the second one of these movies we just watched.

(01:03:46):
Sure. It was it was a much better experience than now.
Obviously, you never knew there was going to be a sequel when you watch this.
The first time I was fine because it didn't end on a cliff.
Yeah, closed out. Yeah, closed out.
But a lot of these movies, when you are set up in advance to be sequels,
they end in a spot that I do not enjoy.

(01:04:08):
I'm not going to touch Dune until they tell me they're done with Dune.
Right. Exactly.
Because there's two Dune movies, a Dune show and another Dune movie coming.
And now let me let you know you can start, but you have to start with the series because it's a prequel.
Did you already start the show?
I started the show.
How many episodes are out so far?

(01:04:29):
Three. Is it good?
Yeah, it's good.
OK.
Because I've read now I've read Dune, the first book.
So I know how Dune I know the story of Dune, but I haven't read the first book.
And then when it gets to like, which ones should you read after people get all fucking
because there's like ones that weren't written by the guy that take place immediately after.

(01:04:53):
There's ones that like it's so the Star Wars universe at that point.
It gets so convoluted the moment you're done with it.
Yeah. Yeah.
Then it's Children of Dune.
And then like there's so many Dunes that I just and I wasn't even that into the first one.
Then I just decided I'm not taking this rabbit.
I'm not doing it.
I there's so many rabbit holes.
I'll jump down.

(01:05:15):
I read all 12 or all seven or however many books in the Chronicles of Narnia.
I read all those, which.
I didn't realize there was that many books.
It gets nuts.
Thousands and thousands of years pass in the in Narnia and from from Lion, the Witch
of the Wardrobe to when they go back with the Voyage of the Dawn Treader, where they

(01:05:41):
go through the painting with their cousin, Eustace.
And they that one, I think Voyage of the Dawn Treader way better than Lion, the Witch of
the Wardrobe, because Lion, the Witch of the Wardrobe, we I guess maybe because it's been
so many so many iterations of it.
Yeah.
You can tell how much I love it, because if you I think tucked away over there is my or
maybe I put it in a DVD case, but I have the old BBC DVDs of the BBC production of Lion,

(01:06:08):
the Witch of the Wardrobe and the Silver Chair.
I also see Good Omens over there.
Another good show.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The book.
Yeah.
Well, I like Neil Gaiman.
He's great.
Old American Gods is a fucking intense book, intense show, too.

(01:06:28):
This isn't wreck wreck.
We're not there yet.
We're nearing the end of the movie.
So let's let's get through this thing and we'll get there.
We love it.
Obviously, you can tell we love this movie.
We're talking about everything else.
Yeah.
You know, it's a good movie when we everything else.
Brings other things up.
Yeah, it does.
Yeah.
Elves are adorable.
The elf was about to chainsaw that dude's brother's dick, which I thought was great.

(01:06:50):
I think one of the cutest moments was like actually really good moment was brother gets
taken by those gangsters, they have the bag.
He's like, no, you can't.
You can't.
And the dude throws in the first like my sisters are there.
And he like runs.
He hits the dude, puts his own life in jeopardy, pulls the bag out.

(01:07:10):
That was great.
And then the elves fuck shit up, which I was great.
And I think that's when he was about to chainsaw the dude's dick.
Yeah.
He's like, no, he's with me.
Yeah.
But I feel like the oh, the brother because they did.
Yeah.
I feel like Santa had to clue his elves into his plan and they had to be in on it.
Like, so they had to been messing with them with the chainsaw because they weren't that
violent with the other guys that they actually beat up.

(01:07:31):
You're right.
Once you put the well, also, let's maybe that elves a little unhinged or that or that there's
a few unhinged elves.
It could be honestly, there's a few.
That's what kind of makes them funny is that like there's a couple of elves that get too
much into the blood loss, which I kind of like.
Are you into the second one?
Yeah.
I'm enough that I know that the elves can get crazy.

(01:07:53):
That's funny.
Okay.
I think you see the second one.
Yeah, second ones.
It actually that's what I'm saying.
It informs the first one in that you find out things like about the elves.
Okay.
You get more backstory on everything.
Yeah.
So it's like if you it's so if you watch this first one and you're thinking, that's great.
I don't need to know anything more about about Santa or his world or anything.

(01:08:15):
I like that it was a touch a little Goldie Hawn at the end and it ends on a perfect note.
That's wonderful.
But if you want a deep dive into the history of specifically Goldie Hawn, Kurt Russell
Christmas and all of the shenanigans with the elves and stuff, get into the second movie.
And what's great is it's a sequel that feels a little bit like a prequel.

(01:08:37):
Kind of.
Yeah.
Well, no, no way.
It doesn't really feel like a prequel.
It's in the way the way it informs things in the way that it like.
Yeah.
Because it's like you're getting more backstory than you did in the first movie.
But then like, but it's exciting.
Yeah.
OK.
It's exciting.
It's a completely different kind of movie.
And was it a year later that they made that one?

(01:08:57):
I think it's exactly.
Well, no, it was made two years, two years, two years to come out.
But it's set a year.
It's set a year.
Got you.
I just here's one.
No, it's set two years later as well.
Oh, one spoiler, because it's the part I'm on is there's definitely another song.
There's definitely another big old musical number.
That's where that's where I paused it.
So I don't know who the person is, is that the chick?

(01:09:18):
Yeah, the chick is.
Who is that?
That is.
Sorry, spoilers ahead for people who haven't watched it.
But we're going to give a spoiler for the song part.
I'm fine.
She's much of a spoiler, but it's just great voice.
Another Elvis song?
No, it's not another Elvis song, but it's as famous.
Patty Lippo.
OK.
OK.
I've heard the name.
She has a really great voice.

(01:09:42):
She did a great job.
She's one of the.
Yeah.
I've heard her singing to it.
Oh, it's actually her movie.
Yeah.
No, it's her singing.
Yeah.
And that's Kurt Russell singing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's cool.
That's great.
He has a pretty good voice.
Pretty good.
Why did the cop quit?
I already brought that up.
Now, when they're leaving the this is what I've almost never understood about animals

(01:10:06):
in general like horses, reindeers, if they're like dogs or whatever, if they're slaying
you.
If the animals ahead know that there's something they shouldn't run into, I would imagine that
it would take a lot of youth.
They would avoid it because they don't want to run into it.
So there's a lot of movies where horses are just run off cliffs.

(01:10:30):
I'll give them that because maybe at a certain angle, you don't know.
You're just running.
They can't see down and they just run off a cliff.
I'm sure that happens in nature all the time.
It sucks.
Why would the reindeer when they're leaving drive through a billboard like they see the
billboard.
They're not stupid.
They have the ability to maneuver around it.
But they literally crash through it.

(01:10:51):
Because the way they did it, they were pulling really hard and it was almost like when you
see a plane take off and they can't do it.
They do that thing.
Yeah.
You know what the most unbelievable version of.
They couldn't fly.
You realize the reindeer in this couldn't fly until they attached the belt.
Yeah.
It's all science.
It took some magic.
Oh, you said magic.
I said science.
Yeah, but it's magic in this case.

(01:11:12):
At the same time we said that.
But I would say I think it's more science.
I think he's an inventor.
Well, he is definitely an inventor.
Yeah.
OK.
Oh, shit.
What were you.
I just had a point.
And then you ruined it by putting the belt in my head.
Now I'm thinking about the science.
It doesn't matter.
So sweet ending the decorations in the house.

(01:11:34):
I'm not crying.
I put again when the mom comes in.
And the Christmas presents.
Perfect.
The ornament ending.
That's what that's what got me.
Yeah.
That's what got me.
So we finally had one wish.
Right.
And it was to tell his dad that he was proud of him.
And then his dad.
Now we're to have his dad tell us to see his dad again with his wish.
Yeah.
No, I don't even know.
The thing is, is his wish wasn't to have his dad tell him that he was that have the dad

(01:11:58):
say he's proud of him.
His wish was to tell his dad who's now dead that he's proud of him.
That's the thing.
It wasn't a magic.
It wasn't an ornament that repeats things back to you.
Which I thought at first I was like, oh, it's a magic.
He can say things and have his dad say back to him, which is kind of a weird thing.
No, I think it's he had a chance to tell his dad.

(01:12:19):
See, and I also I kind of saw it as a kind of more of a like he wanted to see his dad.
But you know, and he wanted his dad to say he was proud of him.
But then when he saw the ornament and the reflection of him turned into his dad, that
was him seeing like become your dad.
Like, I know that was it.
Yeah.

(01:12:39):
That's what I took out of it like two or three times in this movie specifically.
Yeah.
He says, I just want to tell dad and then dot dot dot.
It cuts off in the letter.
It's like, and I just want to tell dad and then she gets taken away from him.
The thing I kept thinking it was going to say that I love him or what?
Exactly.
I was like, I miss you.
I love you or whatever.
And it's better than that.

(01:13:00):
It's he's telling his brave firefighter father, I'm proud of you.
Yeah.
Like that.
And that was important for him to be able to say that.
But then having his dad say it back to him was also very important while he was saying,
yeah, yeah.
So I think it was I think, yeah, what a sweet end.
I'm almost tearing up thinking about it now.
Wait for the second one.

(01:13:20):
You're not there yet.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
So, yeah, you got to go home tonight and watch the second movie.
You don't have kids.
I know.
I know.
Yeah.
Well, then he called his dad and told him, you're going to die soon.
I'm the worst human being on the planet.
That's official.
What's your favorite scene in the whole movie?
Oh, I don't know.

(01:13:41):
I think it.
It might be.
Well, I just these those super sweet moments.
Oh, by the way, earlier this week, you guys were asking sort of what the vibe of the movie
was, and I couldn't quite come up.
But then I think Mike said so sort of like a Hallmark movie.
And I think I said like, but like I was like, yeah, the vibe of a Hallmark movie, but the

(01:14:05):
best version of it that you can think of.
And that is what this is.
Yeah.
Because it's the decorations are sweet and not over the top.
No.
In the first movie.
No, in the second movie.
Well, that's because that's the North Pole.
That's.
Yeah.
You spend a lot more time in the North Pole.
You get a lot more Christmas stuff.
They sort of underplayed a little bit in this where it's like you don't like you see it

(01:14:26):
around in the peripherals.
But I don't know some of it.
But then you look at think about even in this one, the spiral tree thing that sits up through
the.
When the present scene where she goes in the bag and then it goes down through the big
hole.
A tree.
Yeah, that was cool.
Yeah.
So cool.
Bare belt.
Santa's Hall there with the Hall of Letters.
Yeah.
This is the kind of if I was a director or writer or whatever, this is the kind of movie

(01:14:49):
I would make because it's just those little loving touches of details like, yeah, so when
she goes through the bag, I want it to look like the Christmas tree when she comes out
the other end.
What do you mean?
I don't know.
I just want the presents to come out resembling like a Christmas tree like formation as it
goes up into the whatever.
It's like cool.
Yeah.
Very cool.

(01:15:10):
So it looks great.
Well acted.
The kid actors were great.
They didn't aggravate me at all, which I do get very aggravated.
I get that a lot of times.
Yeah.
These felt like real kids.
Even in the second one, they introduced a character that might be problematic because
of his trait of being nervous.
But I like him a lot.
So this has done some good.
Yeah.

(01:15:31):
The other kid, a little brother figure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The little the other kid.
Yeah.
But also the other guy in the movie.
It doesn't matter.
We can't keep.
No, but they kind of reverse roles.
I would just say the point of that was that they kind of reverse roles.
Yeah.
She becomes the older.
She becomes the older brother.
And then the new characters kind of the younger.
So the older brother is not in the second one.
But not as much.
She's in the very beginning in the very.

(01:15:52):
OK.
At that point, he's like now.
My favorite scene in this has to be what I have named Orange is the New North Pole.
Oh, whether in the jail.
And they do the musical number and he's pulling out guitars and a piano.
And it's just the East Street band that I'm like, and then the cop at the very end, he's
like, yeah, all right, here, go ahead.

(01:16:14):
Go.
And then did you like I love that because I thought he was going to walk out.
Yeah, he didn't walk out.
He used the magic.
He went to let him out and he went.
Yeah, that's great.
And then he gives the kid the hat and I didn't need it at all.
I didn't never needed it.
So great.
So let's rate this thing.

(01:16:34):
I give it a B. So sorry, as far as our rating system goes for a few more weeks, for a few
more weeks is at least we go from B because we typically were doing B movies.
We don't anymore.
But that's where our top grade is, is B. He goes all the way down to W. We won't have
to think about that for now.
I don't think any of us are getting close to that.
So I was between a B plus and a B. And I think maybe after talking about it again, I'm going

(01:17:00):
to up it to a B plus.
So B plus for me.
I mean, yeah, that's we we picked really good Christmas movies this year.
It was kind of hard to great give anything a grade lower than a B. Like, this is definitely
a solid Christmas movie.
Probably going to watch it again with the kids and for years to come.
Give it a B. Yeah, this will be a yearly watch for us to have a B plus.

(01:17:21):
Yeah.
I mean, I can't think of it honestly, even the ones we watched.
Yeah.
A better feeling from beginning to end.
Some of the bad just as good of a feeling.
Yeah.
It was like we get the end of the movie, like playing strength.
Yeah.
Towards the end of the movie.
Yeah.
This movie drew out.
Yeah.

(01:17:42):
Just it feels like Christmas.
Was it directed by Chris Columbus?
No, he was a producer.
OK.
Yeah.
Got it.
Different director, different writer.
He was a producer on it.
Cool.
Well, he produced the hell out of it.
He was a producer very often.
Yeah.
You know, you could feel behind it.
Yeah.
Awesome.
Well, great.
And as always, we're going to do a quick little recommendation, recreational recommendation.

(01:18:02):
We miss you, Austin.
I have one more thing about this movie.
Oh.
It's not really even about this movie.
I told you earlier a little story about my my granddad.
You haven't seen the second movie.
But I'm going to show you the character that my wife, my granddaughter said, this character

(01:18:28):
came on screen and she went, is Andy in this movie?
Oh my God, I forgot about this.
Oh, what?
Andy clean shaven and with long hair.
Yeah.
And a little a little darker.
She thinks I look like.
Well, no, personality wise, I think it had more to do with personality.
Is that the same kid from Stranger Things?

(01:18:49):
That's Bell Snickles.
His name.
Bell Snickle.
Is he the pizza kid from Stranger Things?
Did the pizza kid from Stranger Things have a stoner kind of accent?
Did he have an accent like stoner accent?
He was like a stoner surfer, dude.
Oh, this kid's New Zealand.
He's from something else I've seen.
Oh, is he the one from?
Is it where the where the wild things are?

(01:19:11):
It's Walder people or something.
We were about half or maybe two thirds of the movie when she said it, she said, I don't
know if I'm offended or happy.
I know we're happy because I kind of like that dude.
Yeah, exactly.
Was it Wilder people?

(01:19:31):
I know what you're talking about.
I'm going to solve this for you.
His name is Julian Dennison and we know him from Deadpool.
The moment I saw a different picture of him.
He's the kid from Deadpool.
First one has the flame.
But I think he is in that whatever movie I'm trying to name.
I don't know.
I just it was funny.
It's the Wilder.
It's exactly hunt for the Wilder people.

(01:19:53):
OK.
How did you pull that out of your ass right at the right moment?
I was about to read it off to you.
You read it as my brain was reading it because it was coming back to me.
Is that a good movie?
I haven't watched it, but I wanted to.
It looked good.
It's like it's like kind of like a kid, an old man, a grumpy old man kind of friend story
thing, like kids running away.
Oh, it's played by Taika Waititi.

(01:20:15):
Yeah.
Oh, it's a I think it is Taika Waititi movie.
But it's Sam Neal Sam and him.
And Taika Waititi is the director.
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
I'm going to watch that.
Yeah, that looks good.
So is that your record?
Andy is Bill Snickle.
I guess it could be.
Andy is Bill Snickle.
I'm Bill Snickle from Christmas Chronicle two, everybody.

(01:20:37):
If I had long hair and shaved, it was New Zealand.
But I do now that I'm thinking about it, he is a little bit just grumpy and super smart
and handsome.
So I get it.
He's cool.
He's a good character.
I like him.
He's a good character.
And well, no, I don't want to say too much.
Now I'm going to watch that with that in mind.

(01:20:58):
This is Andy.
OK, that's how kids see Andy's children.
Great.
That's Bill Snickle, the famous villain of Christmas.
Well, I think it had come right after, you know, we watched this pretty much right after
Thanksgiving.
Oh, I just been at the house.
Y'all had just been messing with her at the house, kind of messing, you know, teasing.
Yeah.

(01:21:19):
It's like so.
I was teasing all of them, everybody.
Yeah, that's awesome.
There's three teen kids that were just being all teenagers.
Yeah.
One of them wants to be a paleontologist.
That's cool.
That's awesome.
That's that super smart little guy.
He's the one that could do it.
Yeah.

(01:21:40):
Oh, no, he can't.
That's funny.
It's going to be cool.
Yeah.
Oh, so all right.
Recreational recommendations.
Give me another one.
Beep boop.

(01:22:10):
Again we miss you, Austin.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
So does anyone have anything because I pretty much have just been busy.
Yeah.
It's been Thanksgiving week.
I haven't done much.
Well, last week I recommended an older game, a couple of years old.
They're high on life.
I beat it and then now I'm starting the DLC high on knife.

(01:22:31):
Which I have not played.
It's fun.
Like I'm a little bit into it right now.
It's funny because like one of the first levels you go to, there's like a giant monster that
you kind of like have to encounter with and he's like soaking in this toxic water and
he wants you to shoot these like leeches off of him.
And then you have to go down into like a cave where his ass is there and you have to shoot

(01:22:52):
some off his ass.
And it's a bar and it's like Cheers, but it's Cheeks.
And they have all these characters and then Frasier, actual Frasier is there.
Oh, that's funny.
Yeah.
And it's like a whole little like 15, 20 minute episode of Cheers and you're the bounty hunter
and you're a guest star.

(01:23:12):
That's amazing.
I'm going to go play this.
It's great.
It was like $15.
It's worth it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
High on knife.
Perfect.
Awesome.
Mike?
Two.
I actually, Tex-Mex Motors.
Weird show.
They go down to Mexico.

(01:23:32):
That's what you talked about last week, right?
Yeah, I talked about it last week.
I was just finishing it up this week.
And it's just good.
If you like car shows, it's a great show.
They go down to Mexico, bring back cars.
It's like, and stuff you wouldn't believe like that they can do.
I had no idea that these places that do restorations, first of all, they make money.

(01:23:56):
Oh yeah.
Because they literally go through and tell you how much money they make.
That's cool.
So they go through and they go, well, we went and bought, went down to Mexico and bought
this.
For one, they bought an Indian bike for example.
And they got it thrown in with another deal.
And so like the whole out of the deal was like $7,000 for this half of a pickup truck

(01:24:18):
and this Indian half of a bike.
They go back and they order all the parts and all that.
They tell you how much they had to pay for everything as they get it in and they have
a painter that didn't show you the whole process of restoring it.
And then they actually show you them selling.
So from beginning to end, it takes you through it.
And like in this case, they actually-
And they do an actual breakdown of actual costs.

(01:24:40):
Actual cost, actually what they sell it for.
That's pretty fucking cool.
It's very cool.
So it's almost like teaching you how to do this business if this is what you want to
do.
You could do it, yes.
If you knew how to make a fucking half pickup truck into a full truck.
Exactly.
Yeah, exactly.
You know how to do that?
That's what they're doing.
No.
It's literally-
But they're showing you.
Not a half pickup truck.

(01:25:00):
When I say half pickup truck, I'm telling you, you don't-
It's the back end.
It's just the bed.
No, it's just the cab.
Okay.
They put a wooden hood on it.
Oh shit.
No bed at all.
So they do a lot of fabrication as well?
It was old C10.
No, they order the parts.
All original parts.
Like they go on eBay and find a bed.
Oh shit.
They go find a left fender if they need a hood.
Whatever.
That's crazy.
And so like in this one, they only paid 7,000 for the two and they spent like 40 grand getting

(01:25:24):
this stuff.
But then they sold it for like a half million.
And they sold it, well not half, but like 200,000.
Okay.
So they made like $150,000 on this deal.
That's pretty awesome.
I think nine times out of 10, the wrong hood, the wrong door, the wrong whatever, it's just
a paint job away from being the right door.
The right hood.
Not if you're wanting a rich-

(01:25:46):
Oh, for us, yeah.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
For us.
If I see a car driving down and it's got a blue door on a red car, I'm like, well, just
paint your fucking door red, you idiot.
And then you'll look like your car, it's a regular car.
So yeah, not for these motherfuckers, not these rich guys.
And the other thing I watch, which I recommend to everyone, and I don't care who you are,

(01:26:06):
whether you like dirty comedy, clean comedy, I don't care.
Okay.
Okay.
Old statement.
Jim Gaffigan has a special on hood.
And it is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
Brand new.
It's called the Skin.
Okay.
I like Jim Gaffigan.
Yeah, he's funny.
It is hilarious.
That's his newest special.

(01:26:27):
Newest.
Off the watch with my wife.
Just last week.
All right.
So did you watch skinny?
We got, oh.
Also Dr. Phil live on Netflix.
Yeah, I'm having a little trouble because I've listed so much of his Dr. Phil now.
I think I might be done with Dr. Phil.
This one though, it's an hour.
The best thing about it is the first like 20, 30 minutes is Dr. Phil, actual Dr. Phil

(01:26:51):
comes on.
Oh, does he really?
Yeah.
Well, that might be good.
That's what made it worth it.
That I would like to see.
Yeah.
I've seen and heard because he's been doing the podcast.
Yeah.
And he's done it now like maybe 60 or 70 episodes in a row.
Yeah.
That's true.
It's getting a little overdone.
A little stale.

(01:27:12):
Yeah.
Well, I like his other character, the nerdy one that he had.
Oh yeah.
That's what's up.
That's what's up.
That character was great.
Well everybody, thank you for joining us for another exciting episode of Fried Rice Podcast.
Not really Christmas edition, but yeah, we are covering Christmas movies and this definitely

(01:27:32):
hope you could feel the Christmas magic throughout because we were certainly feeling it.
I mean, there definitely was Christmas magic because we actually kept this one somewhat
family friendly.
Yeah.
We almost did.
Yeah.
Should we talk about?
No, just kidding.
I'm not going to ruin it all now.
We'll leave this one untainted.
Yeah, this might be our first.
Yeah.
It might be our first PG.
I mean, episode now, we cuss and stuff.
We said fuck.
Yeah.

(01:27:53):
So many times.
It's going to get an R I guess.
But we didn't talk about, you know.
Well, let's not.
Let's not talk.
Look, now we're so close.
We're so close to the ending.
With us as always is Brennan.
He's got a big old fucking Bebo.

(01:28:13):
Shipley up to Boston.
I was going to say, I think it's because we talked an hour about Star Wars born before
starting the podcast.
I couldn't do it.
Oh wait, no, this is Mike.
Sorry.
But this is always it's Michael.
Oh God, I wish I could remember that that one line from that movie, Only God Forgives,

(01:28:36):
or it's like, yeah, your brother's people.
It's just the worst, just the worst, most gross endings.
Just doubling down.
Yeah, fuck.
I'm so sorry, everybody.
Oh, maybe I'll edit this out.
Merry Christmas everyone.
And I've been your host, Andy Rice.
This is Bell Snickle.

(01:28:57):
This has been, I'm Bell Snickle.
This has been Fried Rice Podcast.
We've been podcast.
We've been fried.
I took a PG 13 and took it into an R hard.
Have a good night.
And bye.

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