Joey And Tiffany's Journey from Friendship to Faith-Filled Marriage

Episode Transcript
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Tiffany (00:02):
You're tuned in to Friends and Family, a God's Way
Radio exclusive where weintroduce you to some amazing
people.
In John, chapter 15, verse 15,jesus says I have called you
friends for all things that Iheard from my Father I have made
known to you.
That's our aim that God wouldbe made known to you.
Stay with us until the end ofour conversation for more

(00:22):
information on this program andother unique offerings from
God's Way Radio.

Joey (00:27):
Joey here, I have the joy of producing this podcast, and
what you're going to hear now isthe story of me and my wife
Tiffany, how we were friends fora long time, began a
relationship together, gotengaged and then married.
And just to give you a littlebit of context, these recordings
were actually two Friday liveradio programs that we've

(00:48):
stitched together to make onepodcast so that you guys can
listen all the way through.
With that, let's get started.
We were friends for a whilebefore, you know, that
relationship part came about.
We met, I guess we met inchurch, first at Bible study.
I started coming to Calvary andChristmas 2008, I think was my

(01:14):
first service and you've beenhere since long before that.

Tiffany (01:19):
Yeah, I've been coming since 19,.
I think 10 years before that,actually 1998 or 97.
And yeah, we were friends.
I guess that means we werefriends for quite a few years
because we didn't.
Our relationship didn't reallystart until 2015.
And we didn't at least from myperspective, we didn't like each

(01:41):
other.
We didn't have feelings rightoff the bat for each other.
So I always really appreciatethat part of our stories that we
really did have a greatopportunity to kind of build a
foundation as just friends first, without all of those.
It's so tricky when you likesomeone and you're trying to be
friends with them, because thosefeelings just are so they get
in the way and it's so hard tolike, question your motives for,
okay, why did I choose?

(02:02):
to go on this trip and why did Ichoose to say this or that, and
the advice I usually give topeople is don't tell them you
like them.
You know, hold off, hold offand I remember having that rule
for myself as well when, when wefinally, when I finally did
start having feelings for you sowe were going to bible study
for a while, and then I startedworking at the church in late

(02:25):
2010, December 2010.

Joey (02:28):
And so then we saw each other every day pretty much
except Thursdays, except, I'msure, probably most, not most,
but a lot of Thursdays.

Tiffany (02:37):
We ended up seeing each other as well.

Joey (02:40):
So we would work at the office Monday, tuesday,
wednesday, friday, see eachother at church on Wednesday
night.
So we would work at the officeMonday, tuesday, wednesday,
friday, see each other at churchon Wednesday night Also.
We used to have a Bible studySaturday nights and then Sundays
at church.
So we saw each other almostevery day.
And then I know for my part, atleast as a young man, you know
there was that eagerness to getmarried, eagerness to be in a

(03:00):
relationship and, by God's grace, he really guarded me, he
really guarded my friends, oursisters in the church.
But there was still that, youknow, I think a lot of young
guys go through it, but maybenot.
But that I think I like thisperson, I think I like that

(03:22):
person, I like this person, Ilike you know both of these
people, lord.
Which one is it?
You know?
Is that my wife?
Is that my wife?
You know?
Uh, and I think you knowwhether they want to admit or
not, I think a lot of young guys, maybe young ladies, maybe
you've spoken with other ladiesand that could be sometimes the
lens you could look through.
Um, when you, you know, youreyes aren't totally focused on

(03:45):
the lord, I don't know if you oror friends that you had in that
time and age group experiencethe same thing, or maybe it's
just guys or yeah, and you knowit's not to say that it's wrong
to like somebody, or or even youknow, find yourself, um, you
know, oh wait, this person, okay, maybe, no, maybe not like kind
of that.

Tiffany (04:02):
It's not necessarily anything wrong with that, um, as
long as you you just kind ofgive all of that to the lord and
not not follow your heart asthe world is always telling us
to do and I think I I want totry to mention that at least
once tomorrow as well um, tokind of counteract that message,
but making sure that the wayyou view those people first and
foremost is, you know, that'sthat's god's daughter, that's

(04:25):
god's son and that might beactually somebody else's wife or
husband.
So I better really be careful,even though I might have
feelings for them, that I amtreating them, you know, with
respect, keeping in mind thatyears later, you know they I
might, you know I might run intothem again, right run into them
and meet their husband, meettheir wife and knowing that I

(04:45):
was able to treat that personwith respect.

Joey (04:49):
That's so important, man, you touch on some really
important stuff.
If you just tuned in, it's 3.51or thereabouts.
And I'm here with Tiffany, mylovely wife, and she does so
much behind the scenes of theradio and so many other
ministries, and not even behindthe scenes in all of them.
She, she serves in children'sministry at church.
So she's there and in the frontof the scenes.

(05:10):
Front of the scenes, that's nota phrase.
She's there.
Uh as uh, you know I'm gonna goway off the tangent here, tiff,
as you started serving again inin babies.
Um, it's so cool how the lordhas kind of like brought things
together.
Like one of the stories is whenyou saw a mom that you had just
taken care of her kid in baby'sministry, at the park or

(05:31):
something.

Tiffany (05:31):
Yeah, recently, recently, I just started serving
and taking care of the babiesin children's ministry and I saw
I recognized we were at a park,me and my, our youngest, and I
recognized the baby but not themom and I was like, oh, is that?
And I said you know the baby'sname so and so, and she's like
yes, how do you know she?

Joey (05:50):
has a phone dialing.

Tiffany (05:52):
No, I'm like.
Oh, I took care of him onSunday and that was just really
sweet to be able to connect withher.
She was new in town.

Joey (05:58):
Super cool so.
So, sometimes in the frontlines behind the scenes that was
the point of that tangent, butum.
So whenever I can, I try to gether here in the studio with me
and trying to see if we can makethis a regular thing.
We're praying, we're watching,we're seeing what doors the lord
had opened so she was able tocome today, and we're talking
about a couple things.
We're going to continue to justplug and preview tomorrow

(06:18):
morning.
Threads of grace for saturdayof the month.
She'll be here, uh, fortomorrow's live episode, along
with alicia and isa yeah um, andthen we're also kind of talking
about just our story, you know,just growing in the lord and
and um, and just uh, you know,when you, when you do like that
person, and how do you approachit and how, what did god do with

(06:39):
us?
Uh, you know, I think one thingwe would say tiff is man.
There's no one way to do itright, I mean there's so many.
Every story is unique yeah, Iwas sharing.

Tiffany (06:49):
That was the reason I was kind of like, oh, we should
do this topic, because I so loveasking people.
When I meet, you know, when wemake friends with other married
couples the first time, I alwayslove asking how did you guys
meet?
Because every story is sodifferent and unique, there are
no two alike, which is nice in away that there's no formula
that we have to try and follow,because it forces us to kind of
take it through prayer and relyon the lord and um, so I, and

(07:12):
which you know.
So, if anybody's listening,again, we want to hear, we
actually want to hear your storyas well, if you have a good one
I mean, everybody has a goodone, hopefully, but we want to
hear your story.
Or if your parents have a, youknow, an exceptionally sweet one
, or your grandparents or orsomething we would love for you
to call in and let us know.

Joey (07:28):
Um, that number is 786-313-3115, so call us or text
us if you want to text.
So wow, the echo was reallyloud because the door is open um
.
Where do we leave off?

Tiffany (07:44):
So we were seeing each other almost every day because
we worked together, and I was inthat season where oh, I think I
like this person, I think Ilike that person Wanting to get
married.

Joey (07:52):
Wanting to get married Not as focused on the Lord as I
could have been, you know.
It's so cool, though, how God'sgrace just covers it.
You know, I think that, andagain, all the credit goes to
the Lord, all the credit goes tothe Lord, but I was so busy
about God's business I mean, Iwas serving at church, working
at church, going to Biblestudies.

Tiffany (08:15):
At some point I even rented a house with a bunch of
other guys from the church.
You were working like threejobs at one point.

Joey (08:16):
Yeah, in my senior year of college so my fourth year of
college I had four jobs inaddition to a full semester load
.
So four classes and four jobs.
That's when I started drinkingcoffee, and the rest is history.

Tiffany (08:29):
But it kept you out of trouble.

Joey (08:30):
But the classes and the work kept me out of trouble, for
sure, for sure.
And living with four or fiveother Christian guys also kept
me out of trouble.
So I think that, even though myfocus wasn't totally perfectly
where it needed to be and I didget distracted with but I want
to get married so badlysometimes, man, that's why you

(08:51):
got to.
I guess the way I would say isyou got to have margins.
You know, I'm going to aimreally really high and I'm going
to be really busy about theLord's business, so when I do
get distracted I don't get toofar off course.
Anything from your kind of like20s that comes to mind.
That's kind of like similar howyou were focused on the Lord
and it kept you from going offcourse.
Yeah.

Tiffany (09:11):
I tried to.
Really, I saw, you know, I didhave to kind of keep myself
focused because obviously, youknow, growing up I maybe not
obviously, but I had a lot oflike romanticized ideals and I
did want to.
You know, maybe not obviously,but I had a lot of like
romanticized ideals and I didwant to.
You know, I had the dream ofwanting to get married and and I
thought and I remember my ownmom's story was that she was
married at 21.
So I was like, oh, maybethat'll happen to me too, but I

(09:31):
was here, I was like, you know,I think we got, I got married
when I was 28.
Um but I was trying so hard notto despair and not to like, make
that my main focus and not to.
You know, I'm like.
I know that what I need to dois be content in the Lord, Cause
if I'm, if I'm not content withjust the Lord right now, then
I'm not going to be content, nomatter who I marry, um, no

(09:52):
matter how perfect he is and uh,and he's not, he's not going to
be perfect.
So, I really need to be contentwith the Lord and um.
So I remember trying to keep myfocus on that Um, me see, I
lost my train of thought.
I, yeah, I was just, um, I alsostayed busy.
I oh, that's what I was gonnasay.
I really, now, looking back, Ireally cherish those years, um,
of just serving as a single, andhow much more available I was

(10:15):
to just kind of like you know,yeah, sure, I can, I can be
there and I can do that and Ican go on these trips and I can
just like it was just a hat Ihad.
I was an adult and I had thisfreedom to.
You know no other kind of likeobligations really, um, that I
needed to do other than my own.
You know work, that jobs that Iwas doing, um, to be able to to
serve the Lord wholeheartedly,like Paul says in that verse.

(10:37):
You know, like if I, if I wouldprefer, if everybody was single
, because you know you do havethat freedom, and so I really do
cherish those years that I wasable to do.
That I don't regret at all.
You know, the lord, the way,the story that the lord wrote
for us, where I you know, waiteduntil a little bit longer super
, super cool.

Joey (10:54):
So if anybody's listening, if you're single, uh be busy
about the lord's business, serveuh.
And I think for guys especially,I don't know if you would have
any any comment on this fromyour end, for for ladies or for
yourself.
You know, we got to be careful.
It's not like I speak for allmen or you speak for all ladies.
Uh, I know that that sometimescan can irk people, uh, when you

(11:16):
make generalizations, and thenrightly so we shouldn't make
generalizations, but I do thinkthat a lot of men would benefit
from and, I think, work likelike physical work and and I
didn't do a lot of physical workbut but but being productive,
you know.
So I had those four jobs in myin my last semester of school
and it was, I mean, most of mydays were 6 am to 11 pm.

(11:38):
I mean I would work, go toschool, go to another job, get
to the library to study, youknow, finish my papers, go to
sleep, do it all over again, um,church in between or whatever
it was.
And man, I remember some someawesome times and and uh, just
the lord, and just carrying methrough and pulling all-nighters

(12:00):
and and uh, just just yeah, I,you know there.
So one of my jobs was a tutorat FIU, specifically for
athletes, the Student AthleticAcademic Center, s-a-a-c, I
think something like that and Iwould tutor athletes and my

(12:20):
major was religious studies, soI would literally be tutoring
some kids in religion classes.
I'm like you handed me this on asilver platter, Like talk to
them about Jesus, Anyway.
So yeah, so that's chapter one.
But so what's your thoughtsabout Jesus?
You know, tell me more.
It's like there's no way I canget in trouble for that.

Tiffany (12:40):
We were studying for a religious class.

Joey (12:42):
So, man, just amazing opportunity there and working at
a christian high school and acouple hours, uh, uh, maybe not
even an hour in the morning aday, and, um, man, just just
really, really cool season, likeyou were saying I wouldn't
trade it for the world.
Um, so then you liked me first.
No'm just kidding.

(13:04):
At some point we liked eachother, but we didn't just right
away say something, or go for it.

Tiffany (13:11):
Yeah, no, it definitely took a while.
I remember for me I did not.
You know, there were timeswhere I would look around me.
I'm like man, you know, I'mhere past 25 years.
Lord, who do you have for me?
Did you feel pressure, likefrom others, to get like your?
I'm here, I'm 20, past 25 years.

Joey (13:25):
Lord, who do you have for me?
And I never really Did you feelpressure like from others to
get like your.

Tiffany (13:29):
Let me think Did I, um, I don't remember there was
pressure, but I don't know if Idon't remember specific people
who were like on top of me,except for maybe, um, uh, I
don't know if I should name her.
She's pretty.
We stayed at her house a fewtimes and she was always trying
to match people up.

Joey (13:47):
You guys probably some of you out there are listeners if
you've met her you know who I'mtalking about.

Tiffany (13:51):
She's the og she was the only one I felt the most
pressure from, but that was justalways, you know she pressured
everybody yeah, that didn't feellike that, like, like it wasn't
a bad thing it was always funanyway.
Um, yeah, there was one pointwhere I was just it was.
It just happened while I wasserving, and this was one of
like those very rare occasionswhen you hear the voice of the

(14:11):
Lord.
I didn't, I didn't hear anaudible voice, but there was a
voice in my heart that I knew.
I'm like wait, I'm having aconversation with this voice,
and I know that that's not methinking this.
I remember we were serving at a, a retreat.
We were either breaking down orsetting up or something, and
you were.
You were breaking downsomething, um, and I heard the

(14:33):
lord say have you considered myservant, joey?
And I was like what?

Joey (14:38):
and on that we're gonna.
No, I'm just kidding, we dohave a call.
Uh, good afternoon.
Where are are you calling usfrom?
You're live on God's Way Radio.

Caller (14:45):
Yes, vero Beach Florida.

Joey (14:47):
Oh.

Tiffany (14:47):
Uh-oh.

Joey (14:48):
Uh-oh, don't embarrass me.

Tiffany (14:51):
Oh no.
No, this is a good thing, no.

Joey (14:54):
I just mean, I shouldn't have said that, dad.
I just mean, I know you love us, that's all I meant.
But go ahead.

Caller (15:00):
All right.
Anyways, I hope everybody'shaving a good Friday.
Yes, sir, thank you.
I didn't hear the topic, so I'mjust calling in.
You know, roth, and the Lordjust put it in my heart to pray
for the children of this worldthat are in these conflicts
going on right now, that are inthese conflicts going on right

(15:23):
now.
The Holy Spirit just put it inmy heart to please pray
diligently for these innocentchildren, these innocent lambs
that God has made and given lifeto, and that we have the free
will that God has given us man,to do right or wrong in this

(15:44):
world.
And all I got to say is thatwe're very, very, very blessed
to live still in a free country,but we also have the freedom to
choose what we do.
So it's very, very importantspiritually of what we choose to
do with that free will that Godhas given us.

Joey (16:05):
Amen, do you want to lead us in a quick prayer?

Caller (16:07):
Yeah, dear Lord.
Father, I ask you, lord, toplease put your arms and your
anointing and your Holy Spiritaround the hedge of protection
of these children, father, thatare in these places right now as
we speak.
It's just very overwhelming tome, father, when I look around

(16:28):
and I just see what man has donewith their free will.
So I ask you for yourforgiveness and your repentance,
father, and whoever's listeningis going through something on
the radio waves today that youjust have to look a little
further and each of our ownplights are own and personal in

(16:48):
our own way, and we respect that, lord, but please look at the
blessings that we still have incomparison to others in this
world.

Joey (16:57):
Amen amen, love you dad.
Thank you, I think this is anappropriate time for that corny
joke.
You don't have to be related tous to call, you can call.
I love when my dad, my mom,calls.
I think my aunt called theother day or maybe she texted, I
don't remember but it's alwaysa joy when I know that family's

(17:21):
listening and calling and it'ssuper cool to share that with
them.
But our family at God's WayRadio we consider you friends
and family and as you listen,you know some of you have been
listening since day one.
This year, believe it or not,we'll be celebrating nine years
of radio ministry in December,so it's amazing how time flies.

(17:44):
Ministry um in december so it'samazing how time flies.
So I encourage you call or text786-313-315-786-313-315.
We were talking about um, ourstory right, kind of how tiffany
and I met, how we startedcourting and got married and
what god's done in our lives.

(18:05):
Just sharing testimonies of thework of God, the goodness of
God, and also taking the time topreview and plug tomorrow
morning, encouraging you guys totune in.
So, tiffany, tell us againwhomever's listening about
tomorrow morning.

Tiffany (18:21):
Tomorrow morning at 10 am, threads of Grace will be
live with our next episode onpurity and honor, and so we're
kind of taking that up, sinceI'm going to be maybe part of
that topic and be sharing alittle bit of our story.
We decided today to kind oflike give a joey tiffany
perspective on it, butdefinitely tune in tomorrow
because there's going to be alot of stuff, um, that we're not

(18:42):
going to be talking about today.

Joey (18:43):
Tiffany's saving it.
She's saving it for tomorrow,10 am to 11 am, and that's the
first saturday of every month,the live premiere of threads of
grace.
So we didn't say we liked eachother right away.
Uh, we were working together.
Um, you had had heard from thelord at the retreat yes, yes.

Tiffany (19:00):
So then the lord told me, you know, have you
considered joey?
And and I was like no, no way,lord.
Like that was my first response.
I was like no way, this iscrazy.
Like to me you were like um,because you were younger than me
, I'm like he's just like alittle brother to me and you
know, he's like a goofy littlebrother I'm not.
I would never see him that way.
And and then, but then I kind oflike he didn't say anything
else and I just kind of thoughtabout it for a minute and I was

(19:23):
like, oh my goodness, um, wait,this, maybe this, maybe, maybe I
do have some feelings for himafter all.
And that's kind of like when Ireally acknowledged that I did
have feelings for you.
And then, you know, obviouslyright, I didn't, like, you know,
go run and tell you right away,like we were saying, I, we.
I think from that point it wasabout either it was about two
years before anything actuallyreally happened, it was just all

(19:45):
up to you know, just prayingthrough it.
And, um, it was reallydifficult to not try to make
things happen or kind of like,you know, manipulate a situation
where drop hints yeah drophints.
I'm like, no, if I really felt aconviction that I cannot be the
one to initiate anything, youknow, just because the lord told
me to consider him, you know,that doesn't mean that I have to

(20:07):
go run over there and, you know, start anything.
So I'm going to just, I'm justgoing to wait and see what the
Lord does and not initiateanything.
And that was really hard to do,um, but I just tried so hard to
like question every.
You know my motives and quitelike, why am I saying this and
what's going on?
And you know we were.

Joey (20:22):
It was a little bit tricky sometimes to navigate through
that because we were alwaystogether you know, always in a
group setting, but always, youknow, working together and stuff
yeah and uh, I'm not asking tobe sarcastic, I I I really want
to hear your thoughts on it.
Um, you know, you have thislike model.

(20:43):
That's not the word I'm lookingfor.
You see it nowadays where, ohyou know, ladies, you could do
it too and give them your numberand you ask him out, don't wait
for him to ask you out.
And I don't know, I don't knowhow prevalent that is in the
church at large, I don't know ifit is at all, but it sounds
like you're pretty convincedthat, across the board, ladies
should, should, be therecipients and and wait for the

(21:05):
guy to make the move.

Tiffany (21:07):
I mean, that is probably the advice I would give
to my own daughter.
Now, you know, if somebodywants to call in and they might
have a story, like I said,they're all different and they
might have like a really greatgodly marriage where it just so
happens.

Joey (21:18):
I told him ask me out already yeah.

Tiffany (21:20):
I told him first.

Joey (21:21):
I'm sure there are stories like that.

Tiffany (21:23):
I would love to hear one of those.

Joey (21:24):
Well, we have somebody else on the line.
Hey, good afternoon.
Thank you for calling.
Where are you calling fromtoday?

Caller (21:29):
City of Doral and Sweetwater.

Joey (21:32):
All right represented, so what do you want to share?

Caller (21:36):
Man, have you ever prayed for a prayer that God
gave you all in one?

Joey (21:43):
Well, she's sitting right in front of me.
Okay, I had to be cute there.
But what are you referring tomy brother?
I want to hear what God's doing.

Caller (21:54):
I've been praying for a couple of prayers and this
Wednesday night God put it allin one.
First of all, you heard aboutit a couple of couple days ago.
I spoke about the empty chairpraying and everything yes now
pray for somebody that was awayfrom the Lord and wants to come
back, you know, and that got usaround one tonight, that prayer

(22:15):
reason why he answered theprayer, because we and me and my
nephew were getting ready to goto service and he came from
work.
He was tired and he said, no,I'm not going because I'm tired
and I don't have time.
And I was in the same boat, hewas, so I go.
You know what?
We're not gonna let the enemyattack.
We're gonna go and yeah, and wewent.
He said yeah, I agree with you,I agree with you.

(22:36):
And he goes.
Thank you, because it's notalways me helping you out, it's
you encouraging me too, alsosometimes when I'm falling down,
you know.
So we went.

Joey (22:45):
I love that and wednesday was so special man yes, and then
the message was right for himit was for me too yes, and
especially the breaking of thebread and the wine.

Caller (22:59):
And we were walking out after the service and he met a
brother that was with him atrehab.

Tiffany (23:07):
Wow.

Caller (23:08):
And he was hugging him and said man, good to see you.
I said, jesse, and I go, yeah,remember me.
Yes, we were in rehab together.
And I go, wow, man, they huggedeach other, they got their
numbers and I asked him thequestion I go, man, they hugged
each other, they got theirnumbers and, and I asked the
question, I go.
But what happened, bro?
Oh, I was far away from theLord, but now I decided to come
back.
This was my church, was mychurch, but now it's going to be

(23:31):
my church now and I go praisethe Lord.
Man, you know, I got into atrap and, man, I've been praying
for somebody like that, not two, not three, even one person
will be okay.
And look, it happened.
It was a person that was faraway from the Lord.
He got caught into a sin, orwhatever it was, and he came
back to Jesus' feet.

(23:52):
And that's a blessing.
Now they get together, they'regoing to see themselves on
Sundays and now he's going toencourage my nephew Jesse and
get going to encourage him.

Joey (24:07):
So it's a blessing and I just show you, guys, that every
day, there's something differentgoing on from the Lord, god's
answering prayer.
Man, yeah, I love it.
You know, you actually made methink of something even related
to just how the Lord broughtTiffany and I together and just
how the Lord likes uh, you knowhow he does things in a godly
way, so I'm going to kind ofconnect it back to it.
But, man, we continue to prayfor you, for Jesse, even for
Mikey yes, mikey, and nowJesse's friend, man, awesome and

(24:31):
who knows.
Hey, jesse, if you're listeningright now.
Man, love you, bro, good to seeyou Wednesday and love seeing
all you guys.
Okay, hope to see you even soonagain.

Caller (24:41):
Okay, god bless you and have a great blessing day, and
if you want to go to the beach,it's a good day to go to the
beach tomorrow.

Joey (24:46):
Hey, there you go, I like it, thank you, kind of like
weather weekend update.
Thank you.

Caller (24:51):
A little barbecue ain't nothing wrong with that.

Joey (24:53):
Bro, you know what I just did?
That Monday of this week theoffice was closed and we did a
little beach barbecue with thefamily, so it was good.
I kind of burnt myself a littlebit.
I used too much charcoal, Ithink.
Oh yeah, yeah, bro, awesome,I'll do that, thank you, thank
you, god bless you.
God bless you.
Yeah, that was a lot of fun onMonday Tiff with the kids and

(25:18):
some friends and family, and manman.

Tiffany (25:19):
Now I'm hungry again though I'm thinking about this
hamburger.
You gotta stay focused, joey,okay where were we?

Joey (25:24):
so we just got.
We got a couple texts.
Uh, somebody texting hey,remember threads of grace
tomorrow.
Yes, we're going to continue to, to, to look at and and and
just remind everyone 10 am to 11am tomorrow, threads of grace.
We got another text.
They said I've never heard youtwo share together at the same
time.
I think think it's only thesecond time we do this, so I'm
praying that it could becomemore regular.
We're praying about a schedule,a format, so you can pray with

(25:47):
us.
If you want to see it happen,well, we'll ask the Lord
together about it.
But today we're talking aboutkind of like our story.
You know how the Lord broughtus together and just to be a
blessing, you know, to look atdifferent aspects of friendship
and marriage and God's timing,how he answers prayers, how he
guides you, how he confirmsthings, and then also

(26:09):
encouraging and inviting you tocall or text to share your story
.
You know, I know somebody thattexted us.
They just celebrated their oneyear anniversary and they have
an amazing story and someoneelse that texted us there.
They have an amazing story and,uh, someone else that texted us
there.
They have an amazing story, notonly how they met their husband
and and and everything, but nowthey're serving with their
husband, they're working withtheir husband.

(26:30):
So they, they, um, they, they'reworking every day together as
well, kind of like how we wereso.
So, man, just the lord, how hegives everyone, just an
incredible testimony.
But we didn't tell each other.
You know, you saw me at theretreat and you know, when I
mentioned, as a young man,having that distraction to put a

(26:51):
word on it of wanting to getmarried, looking around, is that
my wife.
Oh, praying, praying, praying,praying, praying, get a wife,
get a wife.
You were one of those ladiesthat caught my eye.
You know, oh god, is it her, isnot her.
So there was that, you know,like likability, attraction,
crush, if you would there aswell.
So there was now like a mutual,you know, mutual feelings,

(27:12):
still being friends, kind ofnavigating all that, and I'll
let you tell it because you'reprobably more gracious about it.
But uh, uh, there was a roughyear there.
There was a rough year it felt.

Tiffany (27:22):
It did feel like a rough couple kind of years.
Yeah, it was definitely like uh, um, but it was good.
It helped to conform me moreinto the image of the lord, to
go through this um season whereI was just kind of um, lord,
what is going on, and I don'tknow and and but, but the lord
just telling me just sit, still,just sit, still, let me do

(27:42):
something.
I'm doing something like Idon't, I don't know what he's,
but he's not telling me whathe's doing.
Anyway, all that to say, therewas finally a kind of sense that
there was, the feeling wasmutual, but I wasn't gonna say
anything or imply anything and Iwas wondering man, is this guy
going to say something?
You know, because sometimes youknow the, the interactions or

(28:02):
the things he would say.
I'm like, well, now, after that, he's got to say something.
You know he's got to.
Why did he say that?
Why did he do that?
You know he's he's got to likeis there?
You know he's, he's going to.
He can't do that without youknow, kind of declaring
something.

(28:24):
Lesson to the guys guys, don'tplay with a woman's heart, it is
not godly.
So, um, after, but sometimes,even like man, I like I deserve
an apology, I deserve anexplanation.
No, no, no, lord.
You know, lord telling me justsit, still, sit, still.
So having to give that to thelord and waiting, and the lord,
you know, he took care of it.
Our I, I always like how I do,actually like that.
The very first conversation wehad about anything remotely, you

(28:45):
know, our feelings toward eachother began with an apology,
began with forgiveness, which ishow our story with the Lord
begins.
That relationship with the Lordbegins with forgiveness and
that's how our story began.
So we had one conversation at a.
You asked me to meet at thatone, wendy's over there by the
old began.

Joey (29:00):
So we had one conversation at our Wendy's.

Tiffany (29:01):
You asked me to meet at that one Wendy's over there by
the old church and we had someother friends with us there for
accountability and we all sattogether.

Joey (29:08):
Super awkward, but it had to be done.
You know, I wanted to start offon the right foot, I wanted to
clean the slate, in a sense.
So we said, hey, you know,we're going to sit at the table
with you guys.
So we said, hey, you know,we're going to sit at the table
with you guys that were sittingright there at the table with us
.
I apologize, you know, in frontof our friends and just wanted
them to bear witness and, likeyou said, accountability.

Tiffany (29:29):
And then you said it was funny because you apologize,
but you didn't really say whatfor?
I just said oh, I apologize forthe way I've been treating you,
because you, I don't really know, and I was like at that point,
I'm like all right, lord, I feltlike a green light.
I'm like this yeah, no, ma lordon, like I asked you because he

(29:49):
brought it up.
I'm like what are youapologizing for?
Because you're not sure aboutwhat.
What are you not sure about?
Let's get this elephant in theroom, that's been, I've been
living with for the last twoyears out in the open.

Joey (30:00):
I.
So I said I'm not sure andagain I was like whatever I get,
like I deserve it, you know.
So I said fair question.
I said I'm not sure if the Lordwants me or is telling me or
leading me to pursue you, to bein a relationship with you, to
move forward or anything likethat.

Tiffany (30:18):
And I've been kind of doing that and leading you on
and flirting and that's, youknow, not right and so I'm sorry
and so that's what I'm talkingabout and which is not what I
expected, because when you askedme for a meeting, I thought, oh
, maybe he could be finallytelling me like, hey, you know,
I, I like you, let's start arelationship together.
So that's what I thought it was.
But it wasn't that it was.
You know, you were apologizingfor that and telling me you

(30:39):
weren't sure so this is not atall why it's been like, oh, he's
not sure.
So then you know, I give, Igotta give credit to the holy
spirit for my response, whichwas that okay, well, if you're
not sure, then let's, let's justnot.
You know text anymore, let'snot talk anymore, you know,
let's just not.
Let's kind of put, almost putlike she put me on ice ice put

(31:01):
our friendship on pause untilyou figure it out down until you
figure that out, you know,unless so, that's until further
notice.

Joey (31:09):
There's not gonna be any more, you know and you know
again, I, I love how you evensaid it, giving credit to the
lord, because you, it wasn't amanipulation tactic, it wasn't,
it wasn't leverage.

Tiffany (31:22):
I didn't feel like any kind of like meanness toward you
.

Joey (31:24):
I'm just like well, I think this is what makes sense,
yeah but you look back at thewisdom of it and here's, here's,
here's why I gave that wholepreface, because it is ladies,
right, I'm thinking, here's whatI was, what I was going for
ladies, don't a guy.

(31:47):
So, okay, let me say, let mefinish the, the, that part of
the story and then come back andtry to make a principle out of
it.
So I left that meeting and Ithought, man, okay, you know,
yeah, god, yeah, I'm praying,okay, yeah, I, yeah, I deserve
that, whatever.
And then I realized, out ofthese, all these girls that I
think I might like, or I'mpraying about, quote unquote,

(32:08):
which you know, that's just codefor you know, young man, that
doesn't know what he wants, youknow, I leave that meeting and I
realize Tiffany's the one girlthat I can't.
You know, now, it sounds cornyor whatever, but I can't spend
the rest of my life not talkingto.
Oh, no, you know, she is theone.
I didn't realize it till justnow.

(32:28):
Oh god, help me fix this.
Um, and then that started kindof like the next chapter.
But there's a principle therethat if the girl is, you know,
always after the guy, even ifyou know she's in a gray area,
I'm not pursuing, I'm not, butbut always you know quick to
answer, always there you know if, if, if, if there needs to be a

(32:51):
separation not even a break,because it was like a breakup
but not a breakup but if thereneeds to be that, separate.

Tiffany (32:57):
But you see what I'm saying like, I think that's,
there's a general principlethere was a healthy distance
that needed to happen, and it'sthis is needs to be that
separation.
But you see what I'm saying.
I think there's a generalprinciple there.
There was a healthy distancethat needed to happen, and this
is not to be confused withplaying hard to get or leading
him on or anything like that,because then that implies
manipulation, like I'm trying toget him to do something which I
wasn't at that point.
What it was was discretion Ithink was needed at that point.

(33:17):
We need to be more discreet, weneed wisdom in this moment.
So that's what ladies need tohave discretion, not just like,
oh, let me play hard to get,because then you admit you're
playing a game.

Joey (33:30):
You just dropped a bomb right there.
That's wisdom.
Because you think about astereotype.
This is not all ladies, but astereotype.
I'm trying to be as respectfulas possible, but I'm also trying
to be a blessing Right andreally speak on real issues.
You think of a stereotype ofthe girl that's always on social
media or always taking picturesof herself, or always.

(33:51):
I think that's not necessarilydiscretion Right, maybe, maybe
discretion right, maybe, maybenow.
Now I need your help here.
I mean that that's a stereotypeof you're.
You know you're always.

Tiffany (34:06):
It's about you and online and this, and I mean if
she's sharing a whole lot aboutherself and her private life and
if the pictures are very likeyou know, revealing a lot about
you know her physically andpersonally, those those could be
things that maybe you couldsave for your future husband
probably and and then, when itcomes to so that's online, right
, which we have this weirddisassociative thing with like,

(34:27):
oh, it's online, it's differentfrom real life.

Joey (34:29):
Online is real life people yeah, it's real, has real
implications, real consequences.
Um, so, taking that to likeinterpersonal relationships too
right.
Like you don't need to sayeverything you don't need to.
Like you know, bare your heartto every.
Like you know what, just justyou know, keep your cards close
and and and let the lord do it.
You know, talking about peopleonline and stuff, there's one

(34:51):
person I think they do a reallygood job.
I don't care for social media.
You know that, obviously, kindof neither of us do, but there's
this one person that I thinkdoes a good job of it.
When they come back from familyvacation, it's almost like they
give you a recap, like theytake you on vacation with them
the way they put the picturesand they write the caption.

(35:11):
They actually texted us.
If they're still listening, Iwant them to know I give them
props.
They do.
I think they do that very welland it's like oh, I feel like I
went on the trip with them, youknow.
So it's really neat to seepeople do it well and the focus
is always the Lord and you see alot of their family and the joy
that they had there.
So it's cool when people areable to do it well.

(35:31):
So I apologize, I realize, man,I'm in love with this girl.
I need to win her back.
I need to get this right.
Until you lost it, I didn'tknow what I had until I lost it
that is absolutely true in mycase or almost lost it, or kind
of lost it.
Um, so you know and tiffanymentioned it you know she was in
her late 20s and and so thisisn't like high school boyfriend

(35:52):
, girlfriend stuff anymore.
This is, this is real life.
I mean, she was a, you know,she was a leading professor at a
university, master oflinguistics, english of majors,
yes, the major of all English.

Tiffany (36:09):
I was working as a professor at the time.

Joey (36:11):
So we were both adults and so I wanted to treat her as
such, and so I said OK, you know, when I go back to talk to her.
I got to be ready, I got to beserious.
I have to have my cards in arow, cards in a row ducks in a
row ducks in a row.

Tiffany (36:24):
Cards in order I don't know, I don't know ready ready,
so, um, it took till about marchish march ish, november to
march.

Joey (36:34):
Uh, I had a.
I had a specific.
You know this kind of goes backto I almost forgot.
I wanted to connect it back tothe phone call we got.
By the way, if you want to callor text, if you have a specific
question for tiffany and I or I, if you want to share something
from your story, a praisereport, a god moment, maybe you
say you know what, man, I agreewith what you said.
God did that with me.
I think that's the lord.
786-313-3157 8 6, 3, 1, 3, 3, 1, 1, 5.

(37:01):
I had a specific prayer list andI'm so grateful that I had that
experience because I had apunch list.
I said, lord, you know it'skind of like a fleece, almost.
You know I need these thingsanswered.
I need these prayers answeredbecause you know this means I'll
be ready.
You know I had credit card debt.
I was able to pay that off tozero.
I wanted to have the money fora ring.

(37:22):
I don't think I had bought thering yet, but I wanted to have
money set aside for a ring.
I bought you like a token, likea necklace, like almost like a
promise ring type of thing, butit was a necklace, so there was
some financial things.
I think I had already moved outat that time, I don't remember

(37:43):
but there was a punch list ofthings that I I needed in order
and the lord answered thatprayer list, and that's when I
knew it wasn't just feelings.
Right, it was.
Hey, I can back this up, I'mready to move forward, I'm ready
to provide.

Tiffany (37:48):
I worked on a budget, all that stuff, and then I
approached you for our secondmeeting and our friends sat at
the next table, the same wendy's, but now we sat at our own
table, at our, our own table,because we were grownups now.
No, oh, whatever the Lord justled us to do it that way.
I know people's stories are alldifferent, but we really craved

(38:08):
all of the wisdom from andthat's another thing that, when
I think back on our story, therewere so many of our friends and
godly father figures and motherfigures that helped us along
the entire way.

Joey (38:20):
I'm so thankful for that.
Older folks, older fatherfigures and mother figures that
helped us along the entire way.
I'm so.
Older folks, older men andwomen in the lord are man, it's.
It's invaluable.
Am I using that word correctly?
I mean it's it's tremendouslyvaluable it's, it's.
There's no replacement for it,guys, I mean, and it's not just
for relationships.
If you're listening right nowand and you're, no, yeah, you
know a cute story, but I, I'mticked off married kids.

(38:42):
I'm I'm working on.
You know my work and it, man,whether it's uh, um, home
ownership ministry, I meananything in life.
There's somebody that has gonethrough it, there's someone that
has learned things and they canteach you something.

Tiffany (38:58):
So back to you finally, that meeting was.
You told me that you were readyto.
You felt the lord leading youto to start a relationship with
me, but you still needed to waitfor my answer.
You had to because I stillhadn't said anything of like
yeah well, you know, let me know.
If you want to, then I'mwilling, like you just said.
Hey, you know, I'm ready tostart a relationship I know what
I want now and so you had, youhad you know, knew where the

(39:22):
lord was leading you.
So I said, okay, um, thank youfor letting me know, I'm gonna
pray and get back to you.
And so that still wasn't thebeginning.

Joey (39:28):
And then it took her face, man, she was still wasn't ready
to share my feelings.

Tiffany (39:34):
So then I I wanted to keep just double, double, double
check and pray and now, now,same thing.

Joey (39:39):
You weren't doing this to mess with me, to get back to me,
I just wanted to be reallycareful that I married the right
person.

Tiffany (39:46):
Like it's, that's just it's I want.
I wanted to take it, but it'ssuch a it's just an interesting
detail.

Joey (39:51):
It's an important detail, I think you know.

Tiffany (39:53):
It needs to be said is all and not even that we were
gonna like we weren't talkingabout getting married, we're
talking about being in arelationship.
But even that I wanted to treadvery carefully, like I want to
be really careful about.
You know, this is it's not mylife, it's the lord's.
I want to make sure I'm doingyou know what the lord wants me
to do.
So I wanted to really pray andI knew that if I did start a
relationship with you, it was topray about marriage.

(40:13):
It wasn't just to like date,you know, for fun or anything.
So I I remember talking to um,to pastor raz, and he said I
went over their house and Italked to all these people and
everybody was, you know, I wasexpecting like all of those like
slow down, yes, and pray, likethat I'd been hearing all my you
know church life.
But everybody was saying no,you know this, we see the lord

(40:34):
in this, go for it.
And I was like wow, like okay,you know, this is, these are the
.

Joey (40:38):
Who are you?
What wait?

Tiffany (40:39):
this is not what I expected?
Yeah, so then finally, onResurrection Sunday.

Joey (40:44):
Resurrection Sunday Of 2015.
I wake up to a text.

Tiffany (40:48):
Yes.

Joey (40:48):
Well, you got to say go ahead.

Tiffany (40:50):
No, I like we'll say from your perspective.
You wake up to a text from meat 6 am saying there's something
for you in the mailboxsomething in the mailbox and it
was a little glass vial yeah, itwas a jar.

Joey (41:02):
It wasn't a jar it was like the size of my finger.

Tiffany (41:05):
Yeah, it was like a little tiny bottle that I had
and it was this cute littlething I had made.
I was like, now that the lord'sfinally giving me permission to
tell him I want to do it inthis really cute way this out my
I like doing creative stuff.
So I took a you know paper and,um, I did the whole like it was
, like I tried to make it looklike parchment and I rolled it
up in there and when you openedit it said do you remember?

Joey (41:27):
it said greek it was.

Tiffany (41:29):
It was written in greek .
You can't no reference.
I don't even think you putvowel markers, oh, or like I
just copied whatever I saw inblue letter bible, because I'm
not the greek scholar here.
You're supposed to be the Greekscholar.

Joey (41:40):
So there's a phrase in Greek with no references, no
punctuation marks, and I'mexpected to translate this
before church.

Tiffany (41:47):
There was another note with it saying you know,
translate this and let me knowyou know after church today what
it says.
What it says.

Joey (41:54):
It was well, I don't remember the Greek for it, but
it was uh.

Tiffany (42:04):
Second corinthians 120 um for the promises of god in
him are yes and in him are amenunto the glory.
Yes of god, yes and amen.

Joey (42:08):
And I put yes and amen underlined so and I, and I
thought it was very cryptic yeah, and I told one guy and he's
like that's not what I'm like,but maybe it means something
besides yes and amen, amen.
It's like bro chill, so, uh, sothat was my end of the story,
but that note got there somehowyeah, I, I, I put it, I put it

(42:29):
in there the night before oh man, I just realized what time it
is yeah, we have one minute left, but we we reached the point
where it was resurrectionresurrection sunday.
We met after church.
She clarified that she meantyes yes and amen.
The lord said um I was able totalk to her dad the same day, so
I gave her the the preference.
I don't know what you call it.
I wanted to talk to her first,but then I said hey, I wanted to
talk to you first, but I stillwant to talk to your dad and do

(42:51):
it right.
Talk to her dad get the blessing.
Talk to her dad.
He did the dad interview on me.
Well, what does that mean?
How are you gonna?
What are you gonna?
What's your job?
All that?
And um, we might have to do apart two, because even you know,
from there to engagement andmarriage, I mean, that was
another very special kind oflike faith-filled, unique
journey two fridays in a row.

(43:16):
I know it's hard and a big shoutout to our friends that are
helping us put this together.
Um, uh, you know the kids arecared for and we're able to come
to the studio.
Uh, but I just want to pick upright where we left off to use
the time effectively.
Um, I think we left off onresurrection sunday.
I finally talked to your dadand we were able to officially

(43:40):
start courting.
I don't hear that word used alot anymore, but that's kind of
what we grew up with.
That's kind of the, the wordthat we use.
That's kind of the mindset thatwe had.
Maybe you want to share alittle bit even on that.

Tiffany (43:52):
Yes, it is, and it sounds like it is kind of an
almost archaic term to use,because nowadays people just use
um dating and I think um justkind of.
And yeah, it was.
So it became part of theculture at our church where we
were at where and the.
The intention in switchingterms was to make it the focus

(44:14):
less like oh, I'm just gonnalike, you know, spend time with
people that I like and andone-on-one and I'm gonna try
this person and then no, I'mgonna try this person.
And the dating culture um inour modern day is is more about
um of the world the datingculture yeah of the world is
it's.

(44:35):
It's not really so much likemarriage intentioned as much as
it is um, oh, I'm just havingfun and like, and, and people
will even say, um, you know you,you just this is what you do
before you get married, beforeyou even think about getting
married, is you just like spendtime with a lot of different
people and you try out differentpeople and you know you date
and you have fun and then yousettle down later and but the

(44:56):
intention with courting is morelike I I am looking for the
person that I'm going to getmarried to, and this, you know,
it's not that I'm trying to seehow many people I can sort of be
with, but the reason I'm withthis person is to go in a
direction that's intended towardmarriage, and that's not to say
that people who call it datingaren't doing that as well.

(45:18):
Right, it's just the reason whywe were using that term.

Joey (45:20):
Yeah, I suppose you know it's funny.
You just kind of stumbled uponsomething interesting.
I think there's another trendin the world right now where
people want to get married later, they want to delay getting
married or having kids, and Ithink, for the most part right
we can't make generalizationstoo broad but I think, for the
most part, when somebody isreally seeking the Lord, they're

(45:43):
willing and ready, right, hey,lord, you know, I know that for
most people the plan is getmarried and have a family.
You know we have scriptures inGenesis and in the New Testament
about it, and so I know formost people that that's the plan
, that's God's purpose and willfor most people, and so they're

(46:03):
ready.
You know, you almost have theother problem, for lack of a
better term.
You have the other side of thecoin, when people are really
locked into the Lord and wetalked about it last week where
they want to get married, theywant to get married, they want
to get married.
They're so eager, they'relooking, they're looking, they

(46:27):
looking, they're looking,they're looking.
Uh, and sometimes that could bea distraction as well, but but
maybe someone's listening.
That is delaying gettingmarried is delaying.
Um, yeah, getting married,basically having kids, is a
whole other thing, but delayinggetting married, tiffany, what
would you say to that?
I mean, when we got married,you were in your late 20s and,
uh, it's not that you weredelaying it, no yeah, it wasn't
the intention, but but whatcomes to your mind when I
mention that?
you know that kind of trend wesee in the world.

Tiffany (46:43):
Yeah, I.
Just the problem I have with itis not so much the age but the
intention behind it and the viewthat they have of marriage and
having kids as like, okay, well,that's when the fun ends, or
that's when you know I getserious, but before I get
serious and settle down, I wantto have fun, and so if that's

(47:04):
the heart behind it, then thatcan really lead to a lot of
regrets, I think, because youknow again, as long as you're
surrendered to the Lord, itmight happen very quickly and I
think when, as soon as I, as inthe case of a certain couple in
the studio today.
Yes, well, or what I meant waslike early, like as soon as
you're like, you know, in yourtwenties, which I thought, oh,

(47:24):
I'll probably, like I could,totally I was ready for the Lord
to like marry me off at 21.
Like my mom was, cause that's Ilove their story so much, but,
um, but it didn't happen and Iwas okay with that.
You know, I was surrendered tothe lord, so he didn't have.
It's not that it has to happenright away or it has to happen
later, but it's the fact thatyou're surrendered to the lord
and not just like, oh, lord, I'mgonna like push you off and to

(47:47):
the side and I want to do mything and then later on maybe
I'll do like serious adult stuff.
And then I think now a lot ofthose people are realizing that
it's a little bit harder now tokind of get those years back and
they're having a hard timegetting finding a mate and
they're, you know, or they'regetting you know, having
children at an older age andthose kind of things.
And there's different reasonsperhaps that maybe now they're

(48:08):
kind of regretting thosedecisions.

Joey (48:10):
Yeah, you hit the nail on the head.
I think it's.
It's not the age right becausegod could do.
Look at abraham right, but it'sthe saying no to the lord, no
Lord, not yet Lord.

Tiffany (48:19):
My time.

Joey (48:20):
Yeah, my time, my plan, my way.
So really, really important, Ithink.
And again, tiffany even said it, right, she thought, or wanted
to be married at 21, and insteadit was 28.
And so, yeah, I think wecovered that pretty well.
So, getting back to the story,so we started this courtship,
this relationship.
If you guys remember, I had kindof been immature and I first

(48:45):
approached Tiffany and so Iwanted to really be serious.
I told her hey, you know, I'mpraying about marriage, I'm
serious about the possibility ofmarriage.
I might, honestly, I might,have said I want to marry you
one day.
I mean, I might have saidsomething crazy like that.
So I was serious, you know,serious, and so we spent time

(49:06):
together.
I think I remember asking herdad and I think I remember her
dad asking right, well, what isthis courting thing, you know?
And, uh, you know, um, I toldhim.
I said, well, you know, and Ihad been prepared for that.
I said, well, basically I, Iwant to be kind of like official
, you know, in a relationshipwith her that that would be
public, that would be known.
And basically I want to be kindof like official, you know, in
a relationship with her.
That would be public, thatwould be known and basically I
want to spend more time with her, spend more time with you guys,
with the family, get to knoweveryone better, invest in the

(49:28):
friendship, the relationship,just spend more time together
pretty much.
And he was approved.
So you know anything from yourside, tiff just starting a
courtship, what that meant,something that I had forgot to
mention.

Tiffany (49:42):
Last forgotten to mention last time that I wanted
to share were some of the versesthat I had been getting before
and after.
So before, when we both likedeach other and but nothing had
been said yet you hadn'tinitiated anything.
It was just kind of like I hadthese feelings for you.
I said I had a lot of versesfrom the Lord saying put it to
death, put it to death, put it,surrender it, put it to death.

(50:04):
And so there was just like allthese verses about that.
I'm like okay, I guess I justneed to let go of this with no
guarantee, no promise of like,oh, if you put it to death, then
I'm going to make it, you know,bring it back to life one day,
which, as now that you know.
As a more mature Christian, nowI see that the Lord does that
so often with so many things.
He asks us to put things on thealtar, to sacrifice things, and
he doesn't necessarily promisethat, like Isaac, he's going to

(50:28):
replace it and he's going tobring it back to life, but we
just we're not doing it for thatreason.
Like, okay, well, this is justa hoop I have to jump through to
get the thing I really want.
And maybe some people out thereare like okay, so for the way
for this to work is I just haveto tell the Lord that I'm okay
with not having it and thenHe'll give it to me, which I
think sometimes people try tolike okay, God, what's the plan?
What are the hoops I need tojump through?

(50:49):
But that's not the reason whywe do that.
The reason is from a sincere,heartfelt, like Lord, I really
do trust you and I really dosurrender this to you and I can
put it to death right now, thisdream, this hope, and if you
want to bring it back to life,that's up to you.
But if you don't, lord, I'mstill going to follow you, I'm
still going to trust you, and soI did that.

(51:09):
I was getting all those versesand then when you were kind of
declared we had that, you spokewith me and you said you wanted
to you that.
You spoke with me and you saidyou wanted to.
You knew what you wanted, youhad heard from the Lord, and
then I gave you the answer ofyou know, I didn't say yet like,
oh, I have feelings for you too.
All I said was okay, well, letme pray about it.
After that point, I startedgetting a bunch of verses about

(51:30):
things coming back to life andresurrection, and again this was
leading up to, like you know,easter Sunday, the idea of
resurrection and so things aboutfrom darkness to light and
coming back to life.
So it was really cool.
I'm like whoa, I'm getting allthese verses now totally
opposite from before.
So I you know that was um, alot of those verses that the
lord confirmed to me to then goback to you and say, yes, um, so

(51:52):
here we are, we're after easter, we started our courtship and
then, um, we didn't really planhow long it was going to be.
We were just kind of like, ok,we're now, we're courting, we're
praying about marriage together.
So, lord, what do you want?
And I'm thinking like, oh, youknow, like a typical courtship
is like what?

(52:13):
Like six months or something.
Some people might even saylonger, but the Lord had
different plans for that as well, and it turned out to be much
faster you know, I don't evenremember how I don't remember
how this all happened.

Joey (52:27):
I have bits and pieces, so I remember being at the beach
one day.
You probably remember this too.
Um, we're hanging out again.
This is what we talked about.
Hang out more.
So it was with her family.
I was at the beach with herfamily we're not engaged yet,
mind you and her dad sayssomething oh yeah, one of my

(52:47):
tenants is moving out, sothere's a place for you guys to
rent, or something like that.
Something super nonchalant,just like like we were talking
about a hamburger.
I mean, just like I go okay,that's how my dad does things.
Yeah, I was like oh, oh, okay,wilfred, cool, thanks, I did.

(53:08):
I was like speechless, I didn'tremember.
I think I remember you weren't,it was just me, and him sitting
on a bench oh, we, I waswalking, or you had went walking
or I think I was sitting, Idon't remember.

Tiffany (53:18):
We were not together, it was just you and him.

Joey (53:20):
I thought I was sitting and you guys, the, the ladies
had gone for a walk, so that wasinteresting.
And you know, it's just, it'sjust interesting, you know, for
for us, for our story, we knew,you know, we just knew we had
been friends for a long time.
If you heard last week, and andwe'll cut these together and
kind of kind of put it upsomewhere for for people that
would like to listen.

(53:40):
Um, you know, we we'd beenfriends for a long time and we
had kind of gone through thegone through the motions is
absolutely the wrong term I'mlooking for, but gone through
all of the ups and downsinternally already.
I think right I had settled itin my heart yeah and I think you
had settled in your heart.
I love this person.
I want to be with this person,you know, and just praying god

(54:03):
confirm it, god confirm it, godconfirm it, you know.
Um.
So so, before we continue, guys, this is refreshing and this is
actually not a pre-recorded uhconversation or interview,
believe it or not.
I'm here, live in the studiowith tiffany, april the 12th, uh
, friday afternoon, and if youwant to call or text, if you're
listening live on friday, aprilthe 12th, and you're thinking

(54:24):
what am I going to call or textabout?
You guys are talking about yourstory.
Um, you might have a questionhey, how did you do this?
How did you do that?
You might be in a relationship.
Maybe you have a son ordaughter and you're asking well,
you know, how'd you do this?
Or how can I advise my son ordaughter on this?
You might have questions thatthat maybe we didn't cover a
detail and we can say, actually,you know what?
Uh, yeah, let's, let's touch onthat.

(54:46):
Um, you might have a prayerrequest.
You might have a comment.
You might say man, I really, Ireally resonate with that.
I really see that.
I really want to expound onthat.
We actually have somebody onthe phone right now, so let me
just give you the phone numberfor the next person that's going
to call or text 786-313-315.
So please feel free to jump in.
This is meant to be aconversation, uh, if you want to

(55:08):
jump in.
So thank you for calling.
Where are you calling us fromtoday?
south miami heights great tohear from south miami heights.
You know, I learned.
I learned a lot of what to doright from this brother on the
phone.
I watched, I asked questionsand he was even there when I
made some big mistakes too, buthe stuck around.
But anyways, what did you wantto say or ask?

Caller (55:27):
No, I thought the question that came to mind was
just the helpful things that thepeople around your life whether
friends or any pastors orleaders or just anyone that was
around your life that youthought was helpful during the
time of staying pure, waiting onthe Lord, and then the time of
meeting this person and goingforward and getting to know and

(55:51):
eventually getting married.

Joey (55:53):
what was the helpful parts any any helpful parts that you
remember, whether it's advice oror or you know uh, things that
someone did they, yeah no, Idon't want to give suggestions,
but just anything in general no,awesome question for real,
thank you, we're gonna, we'regonna let the phone call go and
and you continue to listen, andwe're gonna address that
question.
Really good one, thank you,thank you.

Tiffany (56:15):
Thank you, tiff, go ahead uh, it's cool because we
were on last that last saturday,when we were doing the threads
of grace, we touched a littlebit on this question as well.
Of of you know, I was sayinghow much I was so grateful for,
for all those friends and youknow, kind of spiritual dads and
my own dad, parents and thepeople around us that were kind
of helping us along the way.
We were not in any way tryingto do this by ourselves, like oh

(56:39):
, let's figure it out you and me.
Every stage of the journey, wewere like guys, please just let
us know you know any advice, anywisdom, and you know all these
Godly leaders around us.
So some of the things werehelpful.
Things were to establishboundaries early on.
Yes, because you don't want towait in the moment when you're
like, you know, in a situationthat you're like, oh wait, maybe

(57:01):
this is not a good idea.
We should stop.
You know, like, um, you know,whatever it might be, if it's
like intimacy or something likethat, they're like you need to
establish boundaries early onabout like how much time you
spend together, whether you're,how much you're alone together,
phone conversations, how longthose last, at what time of the
day or night those happen.
Those kind of things like what,what to share, what kind of

(57:22):
things that, at different stagesof the relationship, is it wise
to share?
so much, so personal informationum and uh, and so that was
really helpful that they were,that they advised us, you know,
establish those boundaries early.
And so we did.
We had a conversation like okay, let's stay away from these
things, and even along the waywe had to kind of like backpedal

(57:43):
a little bit.
Yeah.
Like okay, no, this is.
We actually need to make theboundary a little bit more, like
kind of bring this back alittle bit, but we left
ourselves a very wide margin oferror.

Joey (57:52):
That's what I was going to mention.
Whatever boundaries you set upfor yourself, and this is even
in your own personal life.
right, as you set up guardrailsfor yourself.
But whatever boundaries orguardrails you set up in a
relationship, they're going toget bumped up against Right.
The analogy is a car, right.
If you're thinking aboutguardrails on a highway, you
shouldn't be bumping on thehighway guardrails in the car,

(58:13):
but in a relationship and inlife, they are going to get
pushed.
There's going to be pressureput on those standards, right,
that you set, and so you want toset them, like you said, with a
big margin of error, reallycloser than you need to, in a
sense.

Tiffany (58:24):
Where, if you accidentally kind of like, go
over it a bit.
You're not suddenly like oh man, now I'm doing something
unbiblical.

Joey (58:30):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure , Really really good.
And you're saying you got thatfrom people around you.

Tiffany (58:35):
Yes, I believe so.
And then the other one was justthose same people.
We, we intentionally askedcertain people.
Like you know, I had certainladies and you had certain guys
were like, hey, ask me the hardquestions and and I would, I
would have to share stuff withthem.
You know, accountability that'sthat's what that word means.
Having those accountabilitypartners, they would actually

(58:56):
come up and be like how are youdoing in this area and how are
you doing in this area?

Joey (58:58):
And they would ask me and I would have to be honest with
them- yeah, and for me, what Iremember, and I see this to this
day I like somebody texted.
They said bumpers in a bowlingalley could be a better analogy
Because those, you know you'regoing to hit them, they're,

(59:19):
they're meant to be hit.
I like that they keep you onthe lane.
So for me, I as a, as a, as aguy again, let me not generalize
I know, for me I had to beintentional, I had to make sure
I was going to seek people outright.
So I had accountability people,accountability partners, but
they weren't hounding me all thetime.
I needed to be responsible andmature enough to go to them and

(59:42):
say, hey, I want to give you anupdate.
Here's what's going on, here'swhat went well this week.
Here's what we didn't do wellthis week.
Here's what I need you to askme about tomorrow, whatever it
is.
And even before I started in arelationship with tiffany, there
was a brother that I, I, I Iapproached him with some uh
stuff, um, you know, hey, I wantto do this, I'm gonna do that,

(01:00:03):
I'm gonna go do this, whateverI'm obviously being very generic
on purpose.
This was like a previousrelationship kind of thing, and
they said hey, I don't think youshould do that and I don't
think you should do that.
Here's the reasons why I saidno, but, uh, but I don't know, I
don't know.
And I did it anyway.
And I actually did makeregrettable decisions on that
trip and I had to come back andtell them hey, you were right,

(01:00:25):
you know you were right.
And so in going through thatwith that person, I actually
kind of learned to value theirinput more, if that makes sense,
because they were proven rightyou know their counsel was
proven true and so that was abig, a big deal too.
So it's kind of the good and thebad.
I guess that's what I'm tryingto get at.
Having someone privy uh to thegood and the bad.

(01:00:49):
Having someone that you can betotally transparent with when
you're trying to establish arelationship, work towards
marriage and all that stuff.

Tiffany (01:00:58):
The thing about this that I'm sure so many people in
the world would say man, that'sso legalistic.
But that's when the focus is onothers and not on yourself.
What can I get out of this?
How much enjoyment and pleasurecan I get out of this person,
out of this relationship?
But when you shift the focus tothat other person or to you

(01:01:20):
know, when we were part of achurch at that time and you were
already like a pastor I, Ithink at the time, even you were
, yeah, you were a pastoralready, so we, we wanted to be
extra, extra careful about ourtestimony.
But even just for each other,if, for some reason, you know,
we weren't guaranteed, like,okay, getting married.
You know, the date wasn't setor anything.
Yeah, we were in during ourcourtship.

Joey (01:01:37):
Um, you have until the wedding day to turn around.

Tiffany (01:01:40):
Yeah, we could still totally end up marrying
different people and I wouldn'twant to now like, end up, you
know you marry somebody else andthen you know like, oh well, I,
oh yeah, you know, you don'twant to have a history with a
person that you go to churchwith that's married to somebody
else.
If that makes sense, like if weended up marrying different
people.

Joey (01:01:57):
If possible, yeah, if possible.

Tiffany (01:01:59):
You don't want to have like, oh, I, you know, yeah, I
made out with that person andall these people and you kind of
want to treat them like theymight be somebody else's spouse
until they are your spouse.
Because you don't know for sure, until it's for sure, so they
might be somebody else's spouse.

Joey (01:02:15):
You want to treat them that way, um, and that's the
loving thing to do yeah, and Iwould say at any age, because
again you could have said well,I'm 20 something, I'm an adult,
excuse me, I could havedifferent standards, this, that,
but not necessarily.

Tiffany (01:02:28):
You know, it's more responsibility really with the
more freedom yeah, and evenleading up to before I met you,
I, one of the things that Itried to keep in mind, to from
my own purity of, like you know,as a teenager, as a young adult
, is I want to love the man I'mgoing to marry even before I
meet him and so I'm not gonna,you know, just be very, uh, free

(01:02:51):
and liberal with you know who Ikiss and all these things,
because, like I want, I want tobe as much as as I can, I want
to love that man even before Imeet him.

Joey (01:03:00):
Yeah, thank you.
We actually got a question here.
They said the first one's not aquestion.
They said yay, with lots ofwise part two.
And then they had a specificquestion.
Great question After putting todeath the idea of marriage and
trusting it to the Lord, how didyour life look on a day to day?
How often did the urge formarriage resurface?
So for me it was a little bitdifferent, because I went

(01:03:22):
through that before I seriouslyapproached Tiffany.
Once I approached her, I was, Iwas pursuing her.
I knew that I wanted to marryher.
I was kind of giving her timeand space waiting on the Lord.
So so I think you mentioned howyou had to put it to death for
a certain season.
So if you can see the questionfrom there and try to answer.

Tiffany (01:03:41):
Yes, I'm trying to remember.
I think I do remember thatbefore I felt like I almost had
to this idea of like puttingsomething on the altar in the
Bible it was usually an animal,but like I had to wrestle with
it to kill it a little bit first.
I'm like wrestling with thisthing.
I just remember there was a lotof emotions, a lot of angst,

(01:04:01):
like lord and and I don't know,and um, a lot of tears and um.
It was very difficult, but Ithink once I finally put it to
death, there was a sort offreedom and I was really fully
better able to to worship theLord.

(01:04:21):
It's hard to describe, but Iremember there was a really
sweet season after I had finallyput it to death and, you know,
allowed the Lord to do that thatI was like now going to church
and worshiping and serving like,like I just was.
I was free from all thosedistracting thoughts and the
pullings that I was just.
I had a really sweet closenesswith the Lord during that time.
I there was one of the times inmy life where when I felt

(01:04:43):
closest to the Lord and that'snot to say that I probably had
to like put it back to death acouple more times, Like I would
have to.
Sometimes you have to likebring those things back to the
altar multiple times, but I do.

Joey (01:04:55):
I do remember a sense of freedom and and closeness with
the lord after I did I rememberthe same, uh, you know, before
approaching you and making thatcommitment, I I remember the
same, uh.
They asked the follow-upquestion um, does it vary for
male and female?
I think I think it does,because I think biblically and
we'll see here if I'm learningand understanding Tiffany and

(01:05:19):
paying attention but I think shewould agree that you know
ladies are the recipients, youknow men are the pursuers.
Right, you need to initiate.
So you're considering do Iinitiate with this person?
Do I initiate with that person?
But there's so many layers tothat and I think that question

(01:05:39):
should be way down the road fora man.
Oh, do I approach this girl?
Why are you doing that?
Is she your friend?
Yet there's a lot that needs tohappen before that.
And that happened with usFriends for a long time.
Serving the Lord, it wasn't.
Oh, I see a pretty girl atchurch.
Let me go talk to her because Imay want to marry.
Like, yeah, it's, it's, it'scomes naturally out of seeking

(01:06:02):
the lord and serving the lord.
So I think that's how it'sdifferent for a man, that
because you're the pursuer,there's a more of a drive or
more of a um option for lack ofa better word like yeah, you're,
you're the one to make thefirst move, so, so I think
that's how it's unique for for aguy.
What would you say for foryourself?

Tiffany (01:06:24):
as a lady, I do see the difference in there, in that I
just I just kind of waited, likeI didn't have to worry about,
like, okay, so when do I talk tohim, when do I?
I'm like, no, I'm just.
It was very clear for me fromthe lord to to just wait and not
say anything, not hint atanything, not try to make
something happen by, like youknow, doing x, y and z, and I'm
just like, you know, I'm justhere, we're, we're friends,

(01:06:46):
we're, you know, I'm gonna seewhat the lord does.
So it was, it's almost easier ina sense for us and kind of like
it is in marriage, like I justsubmit, you know, to my husband
and, um, while I do, you know,we do like make decisions
together, but in a sense like,once I submit to my husband,
then he, him and the lord,they'll figure it out, um, but

(01:07:06):
maybe that analogy doesn't gowith that.
I don't know why it reminded meof that, but yeah, I guess in.
In that sense I'm just kind oflike, but once you know, if a
guy approaches me and I'm therewaiting, right, at that point I
can say yes or no, or like youknow, or I can put the brakes on
, or I can be, like you know,whatever Be led by the Lord in
that sense.

Joey (01:07:24):
Well, I imagine, I imagine that it could be.
It could be the, the wishingfor right.
Oh, I wish that guy wouldapproach me.
I wish someone would approachme, you know, and giving that
desire to the lord lord, youknow, help me to to the desire
itself is is for marriage issomething that I think everybody

(01:07:45):
can surrender to the lord.

Tiffany (01:07:47):
I think I've been listening a lot lately to
elizabeth elliott and jimelliott and their story, and jim
went into it already thinkinglike I am never getting married,
I'm going to be a missionary.
I'm going to die as amissionary.
I'm going to die young, likeall this stuff.

Joey (01:07:59):
Which most of that he got.

Tiffany (01:08:00):
true, yeah, but then except for the marriage part.
The Lord did want him to getmarried and so down the road it
was like five years where theywere friends and like kind of
break through to jim, like no,jim, you aren't actually gonna
marry elizabeth.
And then he had they met butnot until she learned spanish
right.
Oh, that's a whole other story.

(01:08:20):
You guys gotta listen to that.
One's a great one uh.

Joey (01:08:22):
So, getting back to, uh, our, our topic here, our story.
Hey, let me just recap somestuff for you.
If you just tuned in, my nameis joey.
I'm here with my wife, tiffany.
Uh, every once in a while she'sable to come to the studio and
we thought, you know what?
Let's take a couple fridays andjust tell our story, share the
testimony of what god has done,maybe answer questions for some

(01:08:43):
people, give some some um,insight.
You know a little bit thatwe've learned, uh, in our lives,
uh, and just sharing thetestimony.
So we're live here in the studio.
Uh, april, the 12th friday, ifyou're listening on the podcast,
then you can always reach outto us.
And, related to that, somebodyactually asked us how do I get a

(01:09:06):
transcript of your, of theconversation?
Well, on the podcast, actually,we provide transcripts for all
of our podcasts, uh, for all ofour friends and family podcasts.
So if you know God's Way Radio,if you're a super fan, you know
we produce a bunch of differentones.
Not all of them providetranscription, but Friends and
Family from God's Way Radio, thepodcast titled Friends and
Family, does provide transcriptsand this will be on that

(01:09:28):
podcast very soon, probably in acouple weeks I have to look at
our release schedule, but justmake sure you're following
friends and family on thepodcast.
And then we got to go ahead, goahead.

Tiffany (01:09:39):
Oh no, I was going to say we should probably get a
move on with the story.

Joey (01:09:42):
Yes, we did get one more question, but I think we
answered it a little bit.
It was kind of related to thehow do you balance death, right,
putting something to death as amale and still pursuing?
So we talked about that alittle bit again, just just
giving it to the Lord, makingsure that when you're in a group
, when you're at church and youalluded to this as well Right,

(01:10:06):
it's not about who am I going tomarry, it's not about who do I
like, it's not about who's apotential wife Right, as a, as a
man, it's about man.
I'm here to worship, I'm hereto serve, I'm here to bless.
I'm not here Because thinkabout it, right, that view, that
posture.
A lot of times it's kind ofselfish Like I want to get

(01:10:27):
married, I want to get married,I want to be married.
It's very sort of thinkingabout yourself.
So if you're thinking aboutothers, the Lord will take care
of it.
So that question, we can go forhours and hours on that.
But but hopefully it sheds alittle bit more light.
So we're in a relationship,we're spending time, we're
hanging out at the beach.
Your dad mentions hey, there'sa, there's an apartment coming
up.
Okay, great, you know, I'm, youknow.

(01:10:48):
And then I remember at somepoint I was ready.
You know, I may have evenbought the ring already at this
point and uh, and you know, Ijust wanted to do things real,
real by the books shout out toyonko jewelers.
Yonko jewelers one of oursponsors at the station, uh,
dear friend, and and uh,provided the bling on tiffany's
uh finger.
Um, so so I said, man, I wantto go to work with your dad, you

(01:11:13):
know, I want to spend the dayworking with them.
You know, really, I don't know,maybe I was trying to prove
something or something, whoknows, I just thought it was a
good idea.
And then, and then I, you know,at the end of the workday, I
said, hey, you know, and Iwanted to talk to you and ask
you, I want to propose toTiffany.
And basically he said somethingvery similar to the first time.

(01:11:36):
He said ah, you know, I knewthis was coming.
We wouldn't be here if I, if I,didn't approve of it, we
wouldn't be this far if, if Iwasn't okay with it.
Yes, you have my blessing, youknow?
Um, I was kind of as simple asthat.
I mean, your dad is just a nononsense guy.
I so appreciate him, appreciatedhim in that process.
I appreciate him today, umanything else.

(01:11:57):
I don't know why it's hard forme to remember.
We just kind of kept doing alot of what we were doing
already went to church, weserved, we hung out with our
friends.

Tiffany (01:12:02):
It was just a lot more together yeah during the
courtship we talked a lot more,um, we got yeah, I guess that
the conversations were morepersonal than they were when we
were just friends, because youknow, there's things you don't
share with friends of theopposite sex that now we were
sharing with each other, andthen even more so when we got
engaged.

(01:12:23):
So you had so the engagement.
I don't know, I don't think wehave time to like share in
detail, but I really was.
It was so sweet the way ithappened.
I remember there were these twoother dear friends of ours that
were already married at thetime, the same ones from the
Wendy's.
Yes, the same couple that wentwith us to that Wendy's.
They helped you out with yourgrand master plan of the

(01:12:46):
engagement.
But, my friend, she invited meto go to Fairchild Gardens in
Miami and when I got there wewere paying to go inside.
And the lady hands me a littlepiece of paper and I was
confused.
At first I thought I haddropped it from my purse, that

(01:13:08):
it was inside of my Bible orsomething, because when I looked
at it it was one of the nametags from the many retreats you
and I had gone to together thatwe had served in that ministry
for so many years, and it was aname tag from that retreat.

Joey (01:13:19):
Was it my name or your name?
I don't remember.

Tiffany (01:13:23):
I don't remember.
I'm not sure.
Yeah, I don't remember.
I just remember the graphic wasfrom one of the retreats, did
we?
Should I pause?

Caller (01:13:32):
Yeah, let's pause, let's clean water and the route great
to hear from my brother.

Joey (01:13:40):
What do you want to share with us?

Caller (01:13:42):
if you can make a brief, because we want to keep this to
a two-parter and finish thestory today, but I'm glad you
called yes, as fast as possiblethank you, thank you I get a
call from a brother yesterdaythat he doesn't belong to our
church, but he's a good, goodbrother.
We grew up together.
We still talk to each other, he,we grew up in the church I used

(01:14:03):
to belong to and we were ableto talk a little bit.
And the minute that we wereable to talk, he told me George,
I hope you're not in the sameboat as you were before.
Like I told you, what are youtrying to say?
Remember, you're going throughsome financial issues.
I know you like to bless peoplewith your finances and stuff.

(01:14:24):
You have to give people thispeople that that's your gift.
It's awesome, but please don'tfall again in the trap, because
you know I share that with you,because I have that issue and
the Lord sometimes tells me howcan you, how can you fight a war
when you're injured?

Joey (01:14:42):
Yeah, financially you're injured.

Caller (01:14:44):
Yeah, financially You're injured right now.
So now you've got to helpyourself.
Now you've got to get backtogether.
Get back together and when youget back together, on track your
finances and your 10, then youwant to bless somebody.
Bring it in.

Joey (01:14:59):
But right now you're injured.
Good reminder, good reminder,thank you.
I want to remind that to thelisteners and to myself.
Thank you, bring it in.
Yeah, right now you're injured.

Caller (01:15:01):
good, good reminder, good reminder, thank you, thank
you, thank you he came up to meand told me that and I go, don't
go back, george, don't go back,please don't go back, you're
injuring yourself yeah you'realready injured.
You're gonna injure yourselfmore.
The lord's telling me to tellyou that man, great, great
praise report, great reminder.

Joey (01:15:18):
You know it really connects to the topic today in a
couple ways and I'll I'llmention it now.
Thank you for calling.
Sweetwater is always wellrepresented.
God bless you.
You know that just goes back toaccountability, having somebody
that's going to call you out,you know, having those good
friends.
And then man, this idea thatthat I mean it touches on so
many topics.
But, man, you need to have astrong relationship with the

(01:15:41):
Lord.
If you have that desire, I wantto get married.
I want to get married and youdon't read your Bible, you don't
serve the Lord.
Man, you want to strengthen upin the spiritual realm before
you try to take on someone else.

Tiffany (01:15:52):
I like how Ken Grace, I think, has put it master first,
then your mission, then yourmate.

Joey (01:15:59):
I actually told that to the guys at the pet uh story
yesterday.
They said, so it's so funny, soshort story.
In the middle of the story Ipromise short.
Oh, my goodness, see she's,she's a good accountability
partner, she's gonna keep me ontime, but uh, so this is a long
story short.
They were talking about like oh, they're so random.
I mean it was such a godopportunity.
It was two guys.
One of the guys goes.
Man, I want to be a dad one dayand then the other guys are like
no, I don't think I want kids,and so I mean they're like

(01:16:21):
talking to me basically about it.
I go, man, kids are awesome.
I go, but but you, you got tofind a good woman.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then they kind of diedthere.
I said, you know, it'sinteresting man we have.
Everybody has a master, youknow.
And I gave like a little likedescription and then I said
master, mission may jesus.
And then you have a purpose inlife.
So so, uh, yeah, you got to beready to try to share, share the

(01:16:46):
gospel.
I, I don't know.
I I tried to fit it into acouple minutes while the kids
were running around the petstore.

Tiffany (01:16:52):
I don't think they broke anything no, I brought
home any animals that we're notaware of no, we only brought
home plants.
We better get home, get back ontrack.
Here we were at a botanicalgardens oh, that's why the
plants.
Okay, yes, and and so as we'rewalking around then you know I'm
kind of like I had some sort ofinkling.
You know I'm like let me dressnice just in case, kind of thing

(01:17:14):
, and so as I can never surpriseyou, you knew no, sometimes you
do now I'm getting better at it.
um, we're walking around thepark and I keep finding every.
We would find different workersthere and they would hand me a
different, a little named tag orcard from one of all the
different retreats we had beenat together.
So that was really sweet.
Until finally there was thisbeautiful part of the garden
called the sunken gardens, whereyou would actually walk down

(01:17:36):
and I heard the faint, uh soundof a sweet tones of a ukulele
playing down at the bottom andmy friend said go ahead, and she
stayed behind and I walked downthe steps and there's a
waterfall at the bottom,surrounded by this dome of trees
, and you were there playingyour ukulele, because you played
different instruments, and Isat on the bench and you

(01:17:59):
serenaded me.
You sang me a song.

Joey (01:18:01):
I didn't think you were going to say this part of the
story.
It's a great part.

Tiffany (01:18:05):
I know all the girls want to hear it and the guys
need to hear it too.

Caller (01:18:09):
It's nice when you can do something really sweet like
that.
It's my fault.
I invited you to embarrass me,it's good.

Tiffany (01:18:15):
And then after the song you proposed.

Joey (01:18:18):
And.

Tiffany (01:18:18):
I said yes, and you proposed, and I said yes, and
then we went to a differentgarden.
Yeah, we went to a whole adifferent botanical garden.
That was like 45 minutes awayto have sushi, but, and this
time by ourselves by ourselvesand we just spent the rest of
the day together and then whenwe got back home, there was like
a party at my house with alltheir friends I don't remember
that part.

Joey (01:18:35):
It was an engagement party .
Man, awesome it was really.
Was it your house or my house?
I think it was my house oh man,I don't remember that part.

Tiffany (01:18:42):
Everybody was there, glad you remember and then, um,
yeah, and then after that, we,oh, that's when we were like,
okay, we need to decide on adate and and it was either gonna
be like, okay, well, we couldeither get married.
We we got with that's when youwere.
We went to another beach nowand we were there to alone
together at the beach but therewas a span of time.

Joey (01:19:00):
So we're engaged.
You know, you have the likeright, the engagement buzz oh,
you're engaged.
Now You're engaged.
Oh, you're showing your ringoff.
Oh, whatever, okay, and thenit's okay.

Tiffany (01:19:10):
Everyone's asking.

Joey (01:19:11):
When's the date, when's the date right, and well, we
don't know.
Yeah, you know, one step at atime and um, and then we're kind
of going down the list right,like okay, well, you know,
before we get married we need aplace to live check.
Well, you know, we need to havea finances in order check.
Oh, you know, we, we that'skind of it place to live

(01:19:32):
finances in order.
Spiritually we're doing well.
People were were green lighting.
Hey, we see the lord and we seethe lord in it.
Okay, well, I guess now time toplan a wedding, right?
How long does that take?
And then, um, we realized wehad kind of blackout dates going
on right, so at our church,because of your role in ministry

(01:19:52):
yeah, so at our church, uh,from november to december is
very busy.
We have thanksgiving events, um,people travel a lot, so
sometimes we have staff staffing, you know, is different.
We have christmas, you know, soso it's usually really busy.

Tiffany (01:20:07):
Um, so we realized that it would either be september,
which this was in august, right,so it would either be in one in
one month or in like fivemonths like january, february,
right, I think even january wasbusy too that year yeah, it
might have been like spring orsomething so we said, okay, we
need to decide, and if the onemonth is really an option, we

(01:20:28):
need to decide right now yeah sothen, so, yeah, we had, and it
was sweet because I had, and youknow I'll say this, because it
was just she was such a such aspecial, sweet part of the whole
engagement wedding planningprocess, especially missy sell
um, she was there with me, youknow, like she was one of the
people that I had talked tobefore and she, she said, no,

(01:20:49):
this is, I see the lord in this,and now I'm talking to her.
Okay, missy, so I have to plan awedding.
She's like, don't worry aboutit, like we're here for you.
If you're gonna do this nextyear in spring, or if you're
gonna do it in a month, we cando it.
She's like I did my.
My wedding happened in threedays, so we can make it happen
in a month if you need us to.
But you just need to let usknow, because after that we have
married couples and this andthis and then all these other
things are planning all marriedcouples.

Joey (01:21:10):
That was a big one that you know.
So we're like, okay, it waslike the third week of september
like.

Tiffany (01:21:15):
So then we got together , we were at that other beach
and we're like we need to decideif we're doing this in one
month or waiting till next year.
And we figured out.

Joey (01:21:22):
So we drove out, just the two of us drove out, and I said,
tiff, we can't leave this park,this beach, until we have a
decision.
They didn't answer, you knowliterally that day, her parents
were asking us.
They said, hey, we're going todrive back to your parents'
house and we're going to givethem an answer tonight.
You know, right, it's not fairto everyone else.

(01:21:47):
So we went down the list againand we said you know, the only
reason and and I think I askedyou, I think I tried to get your
, your heart on it where youknow, my thing as a guy was I
wanted to give tiffany her dreamwedding.
Right, I wanted to to.
I didn't want to skimp, Iwanted to bless her and love her
and honor her and and so, yeah,I could say, oh, yeah, let's go
have a, you know, a sandwich inthe park or whatever the
courthouse.
But that's not, you know.
And guys, if you're listeningand going, yeah, yeah, I just
want to get married and get itover with and that's back up,

(01:22:09):
jack, you know, because that'syou're not ready.
With all due respect, I would.
I want some more information onthat.
So I wanted to do right by her,but she was saying no, I'm good
.
I'm good with whatever Godwants, I'm good.
Did you even say sandwiches atone point?
I'm good with sandwiches?
I think you were planning forsandwiches.

Tiffany (01:22:26):
I think I just said like cake and punch.

Joey (01:22:27):
Cake and punch.
That was your line.
Hey, we'll do cake and punch,because she was almost trying to
come for me like no, it's okay,it's okay we're wrestling,
we're wrestling, so she's goodwith it, I'm good with uh, with

(01:22:48):
whatever the lord wants.
And so we realize the only thingthat would keep us back from
doing it in september is fear.
We're worried, we're afraid.
And then we said well, that'seasy.
The bible says fear is not ofthe lord, don't be afraid.
He hasn't given you a spirit offear.
It looks like september, yeahwe don't.

Tiffany (01:22:58):
We don't like to make decisions based on fear, so so
we knew, okay.
Well, if we have all thesepeople supporting us, saying
they can make it happen in amonth, Because everything else
is ready.

Joey (01:23:06):
Everything else is ready.

Tiffany (01:23:07):
And I wasn't.
You know, every girl isdifferent.
It's not wrong to want, likeyou know, the big grand wedding
with the monogrammed napkins andthings like that, but that just
wasn't me.
I was very simple then.
Uh, yeah, we just we didn'twant to make a decision based on
fear.
So we went back and we said,yep, we're going to do it in a
month.

Joey (01:23:26):
And her parents were like okay, Okay.
Um, but everybody was on boardthem too, you know, and man, and
then I mean going through someof the God stories of that.
We had a couple that came toour church Tiff was okay with
cake and punch, god wasn't, anduh, so, so she, she approached
you.
I think it was at church, afterchurch actually, something I

(01:23:48):
just remembered before that was.

Tiffany (01:23:50):
It was so cool because even before, way before we had
started our relationship, whenit was getting to the point, or
no, it was before we evenstarted our courtship.
It was at that point where I'mstill praying and the Lord's
giving me all those verses aboutcoming back to life and
bringing it to life.
He told me that it was going tohappen quickly and I didn't.
I wasn't sure.
I'm like is that the Lord, isthat just me wanting it?

(01:24:11):
So I wasn't sure.
But the Lord said it's going tohappen quickly.
So I was already planning.
I'm like, you know, not that it, and that's not to say that
it's um, it's.
I'm trying to distinguish thatfrom like somebody who's like
way too excited and they're justplanning their wedding because
you know they're just I justcan't wait.

(01:24:32):
And you know it wasn't that itwas just, it's not impatience it
wasn't done out of impatience,it was the lord was urging me to
like why don't you know?
You're not very good atplanning.
Anyway, like try to like set upsome things ahead of time, make
some decisions ahead of time.
So that way when you set thataside, put that you know over
here to the side, and then, whenthe time comes, you have those
things ready.

Joey (01:24:50):
So okay, so I understand, if I can, if I can elaborate or
try to rephrase it.
You had some of the stuff thatpeople wait to think about when
they're engaged you already hadthought about yes, hey, you know
I like blue, or if I could haveit my way, it would be in a
park, or not, you know a themeand you know all these things.

Tiffany (01:25:05):
That's really interesting, that's really.
It's nice because I otherwiseI'm I take a very long time to
make decisions, so it was nicefor me at least to have that
super cool.

Joey (01:25:14):
So so say, the god story about the food, oh, yeah.

Tiffany (01:25:16):
so then we were ready to do, you know, cake and punch.
And then this lady from ourchurch who they, her and her
husband own um, restaurants, um,that are more like
Mediterranean, you know, cuisine.
She said, listen, I havecaterers and I have, you know,
for our restaurants, we buy allthese these things at wholesale
prices.
I just, the Lord, put it on myheart that I want to bless you

(01:25:37):
guys.
I want to take you with me, youknow, to the store over here
and you just get whatever youwant and I'll use my, you know,
the wholesale.

Joey (01:25:44):
It will be at cost.
At cost, yes.

Tiffany (01:25:47):
And you can even use some of the service we have as
cater, you know, to cater thewedding and I was like what?

Joey (01:25:53):
So Tiffany and I had date.
No, what was?

Tiffany (01:25:57):
it.

Joey (01:25:57):
Catered.

Tiffany (01:26:03):
No, the specific thing that was so fancy grape.
Oh yeah, grape leaves the, butwith something, there's a word,
there's a specific greek namefor it, which, if you can text
us, if you know the name of thatdish, but it's like grape
leaves that are.
You know, they're wrapped ingrape leaves and it's like
something wrapped in grapeleaves.

Joey (01:26:13):
I was like this is this is so fancy.
What is this?
Yes, uh, if you do want to textus or call us.
Thank you t, tiffany, for thereminder.
You have a few minutes left.
You might have a specificquestion.
Maybe someone in your life thatthey're, like you know,
pursuing marriage, or something.
Maybe questions for yourself,whatever it is 786-313-3115.
If you're listening on thepodcast, reach out to us.

(01:26:35):
Anyway.
We won't get back to you liveyou know on the moment, but we
will get back to you.

Tiffany (01:26:44):
786-313-315 so, so you got the catering I mean the lord
blessed us you know, feast, andthen the other thing was the
venue we had trouble finding avenue.

Joey (01:26:51):
Again, just running through the story, uh, you know
a brother that was coming to thechurch talking to him man, we
can do it in this venue, it'd bereally meaningful.
We're gonna do it at a policememorial, which was kind of
weird, but it was meaningfulbecause I had also started
chaplaincy ministry and my dadand law enforcement.
We couldn't do it in the policememorial.
So then I remember his brothersaid look, if we can't do it in
the memorial, we can do it rightoutside, because they don't own

(01:27:14):
it.
And I know the guy at the parkand he, he was really insistent
at that point and I said no, no,no, no, I don't want to make
any waves, I don't want to askfor too much.
And he was really insistent no,we're going to, we're going to.
I said look, and he was likebut not for if you're going to
say no, you know I said no, Iwould be so much more than I can
ask for, but I wouldn't push it, you know, he said, and then

(01:27:43):
the other really sweet thing ishow those people even found out
about it, which is another stepof faith that we took, and we
probably it probably wouldn'thappen again in our church,
because we're a much smallerchurch.
But, we, but in that season ofour church I was able to just
invite the whole church.

Tiffany (01:27:53):
Yes, and so we invited the whole church.
It was really important to meto not leave people uninvited.
Especially with you being apastor and just different things
on my heart.
I'm like I don't want.
I don't want this to happen andit's more important to me to
have just open it up foreverybody, rather than again to
have a smaller you know, moreintimate wedding with the
monogram, napkins and the placesettings and everything like it

(01:28:14):
was just between the twopriorities I want.
I just wanted it to like.
I want everyone to feelincluded and come not that
there's anything wrong with theother.

Joey (01:28:21):
Definitely not wrong with the other one and we and I think
it also had a lot to do withthe venue I think that it would
have been hard or or evenimproper.
I do believe that I think thatthe venue had a lot to do with
it, where we invited kids and weopened it up pretty much.
I don't think we put an agelimit.
I think we said whoever.

Tiffany (01:28:39):
No, yeah, it's just whoever.

Joey (01:28:40):
You know it was outdoors in a park and so I remember kids
running, you know, kind of, youknow within 100 feet of the
ceremony, kind of running off inthe trees and getting the
energy out.
You know, and I know it was theLord that put it all together,
because I could imagine peoplethat wish they could invite kids
and they just can't or thevenue has rules or limitations
too loud.
Yeah, yeah, so.

(01:29:01):
So the lord brought it alltogether um and, and you know,
pastor raz married us um.
Pastor raz married us my.
I had some of my family flyingfrom colombia, from texas, from
all over.
Uh, all of tiffany's brotherswere there um just an amazing
time.
So much of the church familywas there.

Tiffany (01:29:22):
What was so?
sweet was just because you knowthe timeframe was so short in a
month to see the Lord's hand inall those details in the food in
the venue, like the Lord wasclearly in it because he was
opening so many doors boom, boom, boom, boom, one after another,
even like my dress was anotherone, that I don't have time to
share the whole story.
But again there's Missy.
He used Missy sell again tofind me like my dream dress,

(01:29:45):
like a few days before thewedding and uh, everyone's kind
of like my mom and we're likewhat are we going to do?
Like we don't have a dress andI'm like I don't know, you know
I had some actually other peoplehad people had lent me dresses,
I like I'll wear this if I havenothing else but my dream dress
.
I'm like, well, if I could haveanything, it would be this or
that.
And when I told missy so she,she just showed up one day.

(01:30:05):
She's like, look, somebody wanthad this dress and they wanted
you to use it.
And so there was just so manyof those stories that I remember
that was like, wow, lord thelord is in this.
Um, he wanted to honor the factthat, you know, we, we waited
on him, that we didn't doanything out of fear, that.
So it was just really sweetyeah the scripture says you know
he?

Joey (01:30:24):
he rewards those who diligently seek him.
If you seek to lose your life,you'll find it.
Um, and again we're we.
We may let me speak for myself.
My wife is amazing.
She can chime in if she wants.
I have made plenty of mistakes.
I made plenty of mistakes inthis process.
I made plenty of mistakes sincethen.
I will make mistakes again, butone thing that was consistent

(01:30:49):
was that we just wanted to honorthe Lord, obey the Lord.
We just wanted the Lord.
We really, really were excitedto get married, but the most
important thing was just obeyingthe Lord, honoring the Lord.

Tiffany (01:31:02):
I don't know if you were going to share, but which
reminds me of our wedding verse,our marriage verse.
So, just when the focus is notso much on like, oh, let me just
get my dreams and let me dothings my way and let me, you
know, the focus on self or evenon each other, but when the
focus is on the Lord, that was agreat way kind of foundation
for the rest of our marriage aswell, that whole leading up to

(01:31:24):
the marriage.
But even now the marriage afterLord was everything we do is
for the Lord's glory.

Joey (01:31:30):
I want to end with the verse Go, but before the verse I
want to kind of give a couplebullet points of summary.
Walk in faith, live a life offaith.
Fear is not of the Lord.
Faith, live a life of faith.
Fear is not of the lord.
Um, you know, be, be, besettled content, be content
whatever season of life you'reat.

Tiffany (01:31:50):
Um any, any bullet points that come to your mind
just like yeah, being beingsubmitted and surrendered to the
lord's will, whatever thatlooks like marriage or no
marriage, or late marriage oryeah awesome.
Close us with the verse my loveso in second corinthians 120 it
says for all the promises of godin him are yes, and in him amen

(01:32:10):
to the glory of god.
Through us, we hope you enjoyedfriends and family, unique
conversations recorded andproduced in our studios, where
you get a chance to hear whatGod is doing in people's lives.
Jesus tells us in John 15,verse 15, I have called you
friends For all things that Iheard from my Father I have made
known to you.

(01:32:30):
So that's why we love to sharethese exclusive interviews with
you.
Our hope is that through theirstories God will be made known
to you.
But you can only find them hereon God's Way Radio.
Just check GodsWayradiocom forour full program schedule.

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