January 30, 2025 • 25 mins
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Jordana (00:00):
Hello.
(00:00):
Hello.
Welcome to another episode ofFully Alive.
How are you?
It's been a while.
It's been a while, doesn't it?
I know.
And I'm so glad I'm so glad tobe here again.
Even though I never disappeared.
I was always here.
I was always supporting you.
I was always checking messagesand emails and checking what was
(00:25):
going on each week.
So I was always here and I'vebeen actually waiting for this
moment that I would come backhere and talk to you again and
see what we've been up to.
Many things happened since thelast episode.
Many things, and I needed totake some time out.
(00:49):
I knew that I was going to stillbe here to still be, for
whatever you needed.
And that I would still have myepisodes there to support you in
any situation that you had.
So that was something that.
It kept my mind at ease becauseI was putting so much pressure
on me and I thought that was notthe best because the whole thing
(01:11):
was to give you support and Iwanted to I to give you support
to hold the space from a placethat.
It was light and nice and cozyand like a cocoon.
You know, That's always myintention.
And I was editing at 3:00 AM itwas just crazy.
(01:35):
And at some point it was justtoo much.
I was trying to handle manythings at the same time, and I
was needed to support somebodyand.
And it was just too much.
It was just too much.
So I'm glad that you kept yourgrowth, your awareness, your
(01:55):
consciousness, everything thatyou felt you needed, your space.
So here I am today to say hi.
I know it's been a while.
And I know that we neverdisconnected anyway.
We are like those friends thatyou, even if you don't speak for
(02:15):
a while, like the moment youspeak, it's I don't know, like
you never disconnected at all.
So today, I wanted to sharesomething with you for this
episode.
Today, this morning was kind ofa hectic morning, but in between
all that movement, I was lookingat my window outside of my
window in my bedroom, and therewas a storm a few days ago, and
(02:41):
one of the trees, a big tree, a40-year-old tree fell down, is
not actually.
On our back garden, but it isactually our kind of back
neighbor imagine garden.
And that tree had its rootsunder our fence, between us and
(03:01):
them, and.
It was almost over, like thestorm was almost over.
It lasted from one day to thenext.
And imagine it was supposed toend at 2:00 PM and it was like 1
45.
I don't know.
It was crazy.
Like we all fell like it wasover.
It was all good.
It was nice and sunny and all ofa sudden, the crazy winds, I
(03:23):
think it was like 180kilometers.
It was just crazy.
It was just crazy.
Like this gust of wind.
But then all of a sudden, onelast one came and he just
knocked down the tree and itjust came down.
And the massive roots, so notroots going down, but what I
mean is like the base of thetree was like five meters wide,
(03:48):
just crazy.
And my sons were downstairsbecause everyone was in that
day.
There was a red alert, so wewere all in and.
All of a sudden my kids said,look outside.
Look outside.
And we looked inside and Icouldn't see anything.
But then I just moved my head abit and I said, wow, that was
(04:12):
crazy.
It was just crazy.
And.
At first, I was so sad for thetree.
Oh no, that's a really old tree.
And which is not that old.
Come on, I'm 41.
Supposedly that tree is 40.
So it was like, like me.
But yeah, I was really sad forthe tree.
I didn't know how old it was.
(04:33):
But it was one of those treesthat is big and thick and just,
with bazillion leaves all overand just tall, maybe like 20
meters tall and just gorgeous.
And half an hour after, becauseright after, everything stopped,
all the wind and everything.
So half an hour later, myneighbor from the back came
(04:55):
around and said, I'm so sorry.
I said, why are you sorry?
It was an accident.
It was something.
Yeah.
But your fans say, oh, that'sfine.
It's okay.
So we came inside.
And he looked at the back and Isaid, oh my goodness.
Like he stripped the wholefence.
Actually I don't think the fenceis broken really, because it
strip it, go together.
Split it in half, but it is nodamage I think.
(05:17):
But the tree there, but anyway,so this whole thing wants to
tell you what happened thismorning.
So this was a few days ago.
So imagine four or five daysago.
Maybe a week.
I don't know.
I really don't remember, but itwas a few days ago and.
Today, this morning I waslooking outside and of course I
was used to this new, view ofthe landscape, of having this
(05:41):
enormous kind of circle ofearth, you know, which is the
root of the tree facing us, andthe split fence all over.
If it was like a skirt from thetree and.
I saw birds like sitting thereon the fence, on the kind of
broken, not broken fence.
(06:03):
And it got to me for us it isthis happened so suddenly and
for us, when something happenedlike this, you're saying, oh, I
hope they fix it soon, or I hopeit gets fixed, or we can fix it.
So we acknowledged thatsomething changed.
We acknowledged that somethingchanged, but we see this
reality, this thing thathappened and this thing that is
(06:27):
right in front of us assomething to be fixed.
So then we start.
So it's not like looking back,like the first thought that I
had oh my goodness, look at thattree.
It was gorgeous.
And I don't know, I feel sad.
There were so many likesquirrels and birds, that, that
lived on that tree or like youwould see around that tree.
(06:48):
And I was just so sad.
So that was me going back, oh,but it was so nice, this was so
nice.
And then.
And then went to the future.
Like we, we would normally dothese things, we normally go to
the back and then we go to thefuture and then again, because
the future is uncertain, becausewe don't know when that will be
(07:08):
fixed.
I'm talking about thisparticular case.
Then it is oh, I don't know howlong it's going to take.
And maybe he's there for a longtime.
And we have our dog, and ofcourse our dog cannot of go out.
So this came with a bit ofcomplications.
We have to take Loki out withleash just so he doesn't go out,
you know, out the back and justinto the neighbor.
(07:30):
Or take him out for a walk, likemore times a day.
And of course he doesn'tunderstand a thing.
Like he sees this massive blackcircle and he doesn't understand
a thing.
You wanna go, like it pulls usto go.
But again, go back.
It's just oh, we don't know whenthis will be fixed.
We don't know when, Loki will,go back to just running around
throwing the ball, and all thosethings.
(07:51):
And we try to find ways of howcan we overcome these
complications, if you may if youwill.
But.
This morning when I was lookingat that, I say, look, those
birds are just sitting thereyeah, this is a new normal, in
nature.
It's just, it's just, It's justnormal.
It's like, well, that rock wasthere and now it's here, so
(08:13):
yeah, it's okay.
It's here now.
It's okay.
It changed, like the landscapechanged, but it's here, it's
fine.
It's okay.
Like this is the new normal.
And if it changes again, thenthey're going to adapt to that
other change, and that will thenbecomes their normal from that
day until it changes again.
When we do these things, I knowit was a, it was a very simple
(08:36):
very simple concept andsomething that you may have
heard so many times, but when Iwas looking at this, I say, we
are so used to when somethingchanges, all of a sudden when
there is a change, like a snapof fingers and something
happens, then in the moment weare.
(08:57):
Seeing these things.
So we are acknowledging thechange, but we are seeing these
things something to be fixed.
Then we go back kinda lamentingwhat it was and then going
forward into the futurethinking.
Oh wait.
But if this is a new normal andI know how long it's going to
take, then all thesecomplications are going to
happen.
And then we start assigningmeaning, which is what we do,
(09:18):
like humans.
We are, we assign meaning toeverything.
We don't respond to what is werespond to, the meaning we
assign to what is right.
And in the doing this, we losethe opportunity to look at this.
With a new perspective.
(09:40):
And that was this morning andjust now, like probably an hour
ago, I went back to my bedroomand now it's the evening.
So the sun came down.
Right now I'm recording in thecar just so I don't have a low
key barking.
That was another one of thethings, like I couldn't record.
He was just barking all day.
And I didn't know where to do.
But anyway, going back, when Iwent back to my bedroom, I
(10:04):
started hearing soul, things,sounds, and I opened the window
and I'm, I am positive that itcomes from behind that fallen
tree.
So that means that my neighboris actually doing something.
So here they call it treesurgeons which are the people
that come and just take care offallen trees and or trees that
need to come down because maybethey're rotten or sick or
(10:27):
something.
I dunno, probably that there isa more technical name, but
that's the way that I explain itand I am so sure that it has
been taken care of.
So this morning I was looking atthat oh, who knows when this is
going to be fixed?
But then I looked at the birdsand said, wait, they're actually
(10:49):
taking advantage of this new.
Pulling into view this new kindof point of reference.
So of course they had toacknowledge, they had to
acknowledge the change becauseotherwise they would just try to
stand on a branch that was, thatis not there anymore.
Or they would hit the fence orsomething.
So of course they had toacknowledge this change.
(11:09):
But other than that, there isnothing else.
There's nothing else.
There's no going back.
I'm not in the bird's mind, butI'm thinking, okay, again, we're
assigning what we think, but thebirds look chill there.
Like they were like every day.
They looked like every day.
So for them it was like, yeah,this is the new normal.
(11:31):
That's it.
We are chill here.
We just talk to each other here.
It's okay.
And then.
Nothing else.
So if tomorrow, then that tree,that fallen tree is not there
anymore and the fence goes backto whatever it was before or is
a new fence or whatever, theywill just sit somewhere else.
(11:51):
It'll sit on the fence, on thenew fence or somewhere else,
like it will become a newnormal.
And they didn't lose theopportunity of this new
perspective.
When we have this change, whenwe have a change that happens
suddenly, or even any changereally, to be honest, like you
could apply this to everything.
(12:13):
When we have a change that wedon't like or that makes us feel
uncomfortable.
At that moment, we startthinking how to fix it.
We go back to lamenting what itwas before and then we.
Project into the future, thisnew normal that is a very
uncomfortable new normal,assigning all the meaning of
(12:36):
what it will be for us tocontinue in this new normal.
And in all those steps, in allthose steps that we do, there is
never an honoring of what isright now.
(12:56):
And saying, oh wait, I don'tknow how long it's going to last
this, but this is a newperspective.
So even from my window, I seethings that I couldn't see
before because the tree wasmassive.
So I'm seeing, other houses frombehind and other things.
And actually, I spoke with aneighbor this morning and he
(13:18):
said.
The next day I was just sitting,drinking my coffee and then all
of a sudden I felt like it was adifferent light.
It was different, it feltdifferent.
And then I just lookedeverywhere and I realized the
tree was not there anymore.
So we could have so manybenefits of this new perspective
(13:39):
if we only let us be open, evenif it is just to teach us
something, even if it is justfor us to see something, even if
it is just to pass the time,because we don't know.
Maybe this change could last anhour.
Maybe this change could last aday, a week, a year, 10 years,
it doesn't matter.
But when we get attached to whatit was, we never honor what is
(14:04):
and we lose.
This new opportunity for thisnew perspective that we didn't
have before.
We didn't, we couldn't, it wasimpossible to have this new
perspective before, just becauseit wasn't available to us, but
now it is.
So anyway, this is somethingsuper simple and probably heard
it so many times about thisgoing to the back go going, to
(14:27):
the past, going to the future,which is something that our
minds do all the time.
And I get it.
Our brains, the main function ofthe brain is to survive.
And of course is going to lookat the back.
Look at the back.
He's not going to look at theback.
He's going to look back forother situations that happened.
Just to see if it can match it.
And of course project it dostatistics and see if there's
(14:52):
any danger ahead or something.
So I get that our brains dothis, but we are not just our
brains and we have our eyes tosee, and we have our bodies to,
just take a deep breath, take afew deep breaths and just say
it's okay.
Like it's okay.
I know that this change.
(15:13):
I may not like, and this couldbe for anything.
It doesn't have a physicalchange.
It could be a mental change.
It could be you lose your job oryou have a fight with someone
that you care about, or you'retrying your best for ears with
somebody in your family or afriend or something.
And you have this relationshipand you try and you try and you
(15:33):
super try, and then it's justlook.
It's done.
There's nothing else to do.
Like, At least not now, maybenext year, but not now.
And it hit us, it hit us reallybad, this new change.
But if we just pause for asecond and just take a few deep
breaths and at least for amoment, just for a moment, we
(16:01):
try to not assign any meaningbecause again, when we assign
meaning, we, it's just biased.
We assign the meaning that wewant.
We could assign any meaning.
We could assign.
That is a fantastic change.
Or we can assign the meaningthat is a really crappy thing
that is happening and that isgoing to be really bad for us.
So when we assign the meaning,we are actually choosing, we are
(16:23):
choosing how we will feel whenwe assign this meaning.
So we are choosing how we willthink when, we think this thing
and we assign this meaning.
And then of course the thoughtthat we will have are going to
of course, be coherent withoutmeaning that we just assigned.
So we are actually choosing howwe were going to feel.
When we assign the meaning,usually we change, most of the
(16:46):
times we assign meaning with anegative connotation with a
negative impact on our lives.
So of course, it would be greatif you could see at it like, oh
wait.
Maybe I don't know it now, butthis is going to be fantastic.
Maybe it isn't comfortable now,but maybe this means that I will
have some more sunlight when I'mhaving my coffee in the morning.
(17:07):
Like it happened to my neighbor.
It is just, it's just trusting.
And I know, I know thatsometimes it is just hard to
trust and maybe, li life is justsometimes a bit chaotic
sometimes and a bit but we arealways in control of what we do
(17:29):
in the moment, the way thatwe're respond in the moment.
And if we're only reacting, ifwe're only reacting to what is
happening and.
Just letting our brain do whatour brain does because what it's
been trained to do for years andyears, then we are losing this
(17:50):
new perspective.
We are losing this opportunityto see with new eyes, literally
with new eyes is just, it's justcrazy.
And look, this morning.
Actually when we came back I washearing the birds like at the
(18:11):
front of my house and it wasjust insane.
It was this beautiful, like theywere all talking at the same
time.
It was so beautiful and I don'tknow if I heard that before.
That tree from the back fell.
So I don't know if maybe thoseare the birds from the back that
came here to the front, to this,near this other tree that's
(18:31):
here.
I don't know.
But there are so many kind oframifications.
There are so many things thatwill replicate and that will
bleed into all different areasfor one change.
And when we assign a meaning Anegative meaning.
If it's positive, then great.
(18:51):
Enjoy it.
You're going to feel amazing.
But if it is negative, then it'sso much better just to take
control of it and just, even ifwe don't wanna change or we feel
like we can't, which we can.
Like you can decide if you wanta chocolate ice cream or vanilla
ice cream, or an apple or a hamand cheese sandwich so you can
(19:13):
change your thoughts.
Okay?
So you can definitely change it.
But if you feel like in thatparticular day, then you have
less kind of control over yourmind and you feel like that is
something that you cannot do atthe moment, then you always have
your breath.
You always have your breath andyour body to help you with.
(19:35):
Not reacting, but actuallyresponding.
And the way to respond is tohave a pause, like a micro pause
between the stimuli and thereaction, the action and the
reaction.
So when you react is instant,but when you respond, you take
that, like breathe in.
(19:56):
And then that mini pause.
Helps you choose, because whenyou react, it's just automatic.
That is a programming.
That is something that is is inyour subconscious, so it's just
reacting.
It's responding but in a veryinstant and automatic way, which
is not you choosing, maybe youchose it in the past, but maybe
you don't choose it now.
(20:17):
So you can always pause havesome breaths and just maybe.
Maybe be open to the possibilitythat there is something that
this new change will bring toyou, will bring to you a new
perspective, will bring to younew skills, will bring to you
something really cool that mayhappen tomorrow that you don't
(20:38):
know right now in this veryinstant.
So there you go.
That was my, my thing for today.
And I thought that it was goingto be like five minutes, but I
have no idea how long I've beenrecording.
I have my phone in airplane modeand in do not disturb, and I
actually, I have, when I put doNot Disturb on my phone, I have
(21:00):
a picture of Loki when he justarrived and he's so cute.
So cute.
Anyway, I hope you have abeautiful week and I'll speak to
you next week.
I don't know, maybe sooner.
Who knows this new vibe goingon?
But definitely next week.
So I hope you have a beautifulday today, night, wherever you
(21:20):
are, and that you will haveopportunities to, to try this.
Opportunities to try, even if itis just simple things, like he
thought it was going to besunny, and then it starts
raining.
Like instead of being pissed atit, just what can you do about
it?
What can you do about the waythat you feel?
Again, remember we spoke aboutthis like bazillion years ago,
(21:44):
but remember that when you thinka thought and an emotion comes
as a chemical response in yourbody, it only lasts 90 seconds.
So if, when you're angry, it'lllast more than 90 seconds, and
that means that you're havingmore thoughts, that of course
they are coherent to that firstthought.
That keeps.
(22:05):
That same emotion or somewhatthat same emotion in a loop, in
a kind of close loop.
So if you have a thought thatyou don't like and you're
feeling, you know, in a bad wayor in a way that you don't wanna
feel or is uncomfortable, thenjust choose what you would want
to be thinking, and then giveyourself a breather.
(22:27):
Give yourself a few deepbreaths.
And just for 90 seconds you caneven set a timer on your phone.
You can just 90 seconds, putyour hand on your heart.
Just be on a place where you canbe by yourself, even that's just
the bathroom.
Or just do it in your mind.
Like it's fine.
You don't have to react in themoment, just take some time out,
you know, just timeout, youknow, like you would do with
(22:49):
kids like timeout.
Okay.
Just take those 90 seconds,timeout and.
I'm sure that you will, you'llperceive something different,
and it is just that it is thisrepetition of every time.
It's just breaking the pattern,in the moment, and then choosing
something different.
And you'll see that step bystep, like bit by bit.
(23:09):
It's going to be easier, it'sgoing to be wider.
These poles in between thestimuli and the.
The response, this reaction,this automatic response.
And if there is a day that youfeel that it's just harder than
usual, it's okay.
It's okay.
Look, it's not I'll tell youwhat I was thinking when I was
having my driving lessons lastyear.
I thought that there, there werea few days that I felt that I
(23:33):
was just going back to squareone.
Oh my goodness, what's going on?
I felt that I had it and thenI'm back in score one.
You're not like, whateverhappens the, this is thing that
helped me a lot.
I dunno if you felt, if it'llhelp you, but you can try it,
you can always try it.
I put in numbers to everythingjust because it's easier.
It's a very graphic way ofmeasuring things.
(23:54):
So what I used to do was, okay,so I will stop.
Just having a feel of me goingback to square, one of me
feeling amazing, like the mostskillful driver in the world,
and just put a number.
So in that case, what I chosewas percentage.
So instead of putting like oneto 10, I would say, okay let's
talk about percentage.
Like from zero being like squareone I have no idea what to do.
(24:19):
And a hundred being.
How I want to feel when I drive.
And I'm not talking about veryskillful driver, driver that has
been driving for 25 years.
Because of course that will takeme a bit of time.
But what I mean is having thetest I never wanted to know
enough to pass the test.
I have kids, I have family, andI value my life so much.
(24:41):
So I didn't wanna risk it.
So I wanted to actually be agood driver.
Good conscious, respectfulpaying attention kind of driver.
So that was my a hundredpercent.
So for whatever you want foryourself regarding that.
Then just put a number from oneto a hundred.
(25:03):
And then how do you feel today?
So every time I came back home.
From the lessons I felt, okay,how do I feel today in
percentage?
And it just came to me, justpopped in my head, like 70% or
40% but from that moment, evenif I went from 70% to 45%, which
is, it's just crazy, but thatwas a number that kind of popped
(25:24):
into my head.
It didn't matter because I wasnever back.
I.
In Square one because there areso many things that could
happen.
I could be in the time of themonth or it could be I don't
know, maybe a bit tired that dayor maybe I didn't sleep well
that night or something, or itwas raining a lot.
Because here in Be Rains a lot,so anyway so there you have a
(25:47):
few tools here.
To change perspective and justhere and there, a few tweak here
and there and see what works foryou.
So have a lovely week and I'llspeak to you soon.
Bye Bye.
Hello.
(00:00):
Hello.
Welcome to another episode ofFully Alive.
How are you?
It's been a while.
It's been a while, doesn't it?
I know.
And I'm so glad I'm so glad tobe here again.
Even though I never disappeared.
I was always here.
I was always supporting you.
I was always checking messagesand emails and checking what was
(00:25):
going on each week.
So I was always here and I'vebeen actually waiting for this
moment that I would come backhere and talk to you again and
see what we've been up to.
Many things happened since thelast episode.
Many things, and I needed totake some time out.
(00:49):
I knew that I was going to stillbe here to still be, for
whatever you needed.
And that I would still have myepisodes there to support you in
any situation that you had.
So that was something that.
It kept my mind at ease becauseI was putting so much pressure
on me and I thought that was notthe best because the whole thing
(01:11):
was to give you support and Iwanted to I to give you support
to hold the space from a placethat.
It was light and nice and cozyand like a cocoon.
You know, That's always myintention.
And I was editing at 3:00 AM itwas just crazy.
(01:35):
And at some point it was justtoo much.
I was trying to handle manythings at the same time, and I
was needed to support somebodyand.
And it was just too much.
It was just too much.
So I'm glad that you kept yourgrowth, your awareness, your
(01:55):
consciousness, everything thatyou felt you needed, your space.
So here I am today to say hi.
I know it's been a while.
And I know that we neverdisconnected anyway.
We are like those friends thatyou, even if you don't speak for
(02:15):
a while, like the moment youspeak, it's I don't know, like
you never disconnected at all.
So today, I wanted to sharesomething with you for this
episode.
Today, this morning was kind ofa hectic morning, but in between
all that movement, I was lookingat my window outside of my
window in my bedroom, and therewas a storm a few days ago, and
(02:41):
one of the trees, a big tree, a40-year-old tree fell down, is
not actually.
On our back garden, but it isactually our kind of back
neighbor imagine garden.
And that tree had its rootsunder our fence, between us and
(03:01):
them, and.
It was almost over, like thestorm was almost over.
It lasted from one day to thenext.
And imagine it was supposed toend at 2:00 PM and it was like 1
45.
I don't know.
It was crazy.
Like we all fell like it wasover.
It was all good.
It was nice and sunny and all ofa sudden, the crazy winds, I
(03:23):
think it was like 180kilometers.
It was just crazy.
It was just crazy.
Like this gust of wind.
But then all of a sudden, onelast one came and he just
knocked down the tree and itjust came down.
And the massive roots, so notroots going down, but what I
mean is like the base of thetree was like five meters wide,
(03:48):
just crazy.
And my sons were downstairsbecause everyone was in that
day.
There was a red alert, so wewere all in and.
All of a sudden my kids said,look outside.
Look outside.
And we looked inside and Icouldn't see anything.
But then I just moved my head abit and I said, wow, that was
(04:12):
crazy.
It was just crazy.
And.
At first, I was so sad for thetree.
Oh no, that's a really old tree.
And which is not that old.
Come on, I'm 41.
Supposedly that tree is 40.
So it was like, like me.
But yeah, I was really sad forthe tree.
I didn't know how old it was.
(04:33):
But it was one of those treesthat is big and thick and just,
with bazillion leaves all overand just tall, maybe like 20
meters tall and just gorgeous.
And half an hour after, becauseright after, everything stopped,
all the wind and everything.
So half an hour later, myneighbor from the back came
(04:55):
around and said, I'm so sorry.
I said, why are you sorry?
It was an accident.
It was something.
Yeah.
But your fans say, oh, that'sfine.
It's okay.
So we came inside.
And he looked at the back and Isaid, oh my goodness.
Like he stripped the wholefence.
Actually I don't think the fenceis broken really, because it
strip it, go together.
Split it in half, but it is nodamage I think.
(05:17):
But the tree there, but anyway,so this whole thing wants to
tell you what happened thismorning.
So this was a few days ago.
So imagine four or five daysago.
Maybe a week.
I don't know.
I really don't remember, but itwas a few days ago and.
Today, this morning I waslooking outside and of course I
was used to this new, view ofthe landscape, of having this
(05:41):
enormous kind of circle ofearth, you know, which is the
root of the tree facing us, andthe split fence all over.
If it was like a skirt from thetree and.
I saw birds like sitting thereon the fence, on the kind of
broken, not broken fence.
(06:03):
And it got to me for us it isthis happened so suddenly and
for us, when something happenedlike this, you're saying, oh, I
hope they fix it soon, or I hopeit gets fixed, or we can fix it.
So we acknowledged thatsomething changed.
We acknowledged that somethingchanged, but we see this
reality, this thing thathappened and this thing that is
(06:27):
right in front of us assomething to be fixed.
So then we start.
So it's not like looking back,like the first thought that I
had oh my goodness, look at thattree.
It was gorgeous.
And I don't know, I feel sad.
There were so many likesquirrels and birds, that, that
lived on that tree or like youwould see around that tree.
(06:48):
And I was just so sad.
So that was me going back, oh,but it was so nice, this was so
nice.
And then.
And then went to the future.
Like we, we would normally dothese things, we normally go to
the back and then we go to thefuture and then again, because
the future is uncertain, becausewe don't know when that will be
(07:08):
fixed.
I'm talking about thisparticular case.
Then it is oh, I don't know howlong it's going to take.
And maybe he's there for a longtime.
And we have our dog, and ofcourse our dog cannot of go out.
So this came with a bit ofcomplications.
We have to take Loki out withleash just so he doesn't go out,
you know, out the back and justinto the neighbor.
(07:30):
Or take him out for a walk, likemore times a day.
And of course he doesn'tunderstand a thing.
Like he sees this massive blackcircle and he doesn't understand
a thing.
You wanna go, like it pulls usto go.
But again, go back.
It's just oh, we don't know whenthis will be fixed.
We don't know when, Loki will,go back to just running around
throwing the ball, and all thosethings.
(07:51):
And we try to find ways of howcan we overcome these
complications, if you may if youwill.
But.
This morning when I was lookingat that, I say, look, those
birds are just sitting thereyeah, this is a new normal, in
nature.
It's just, it's just, It's justnormal.
It's like, well, that rock wasthere and now it's here, so
(08:13):
yeah, it's okay.
It's here now.
It's okay.
It changed, like the landscapechanged, but it's here, it's
fine.
It's okay.
Like this is the new normal.
And if it changes again, thenthey're going to adapt to that
other change, and that will thenbecomes their normal from that
day until it changes again.
When we do these things, I knowit was a, it was a very simple
(08:36):
very simple concept andsomething that you may have
heard so many times, but when Iwas looking at this, I say, we
are so used to when somethingchanges, all of a sudden when
there is a change, like a snapof fingers and something
happens, then in the moment weare.
(08:57):
Seeing these things.
So we are acknowledging thechange, but we are seeing these
things something to be fixed.
Then we go back kinda lamentingwhat it was and then going
forward into the futurethinking.
Oh wait.
But if this is a new normal andI know how long it's going to
take, then all thesecomplications are going to
happen.
And then we start assigningmeaning, which is what we do,
(09:18):
like humans.
We are, we assign meaning toeverything.
We don't respond to what is werespond to, the meaning we
assign to what is right.
And in the doing this, we losethe opportunity to look at this.
With a new perspective.
(09:40):
And that was this morning andjust now, like probably an hour
ago, I went back to my bedroomand now it's the evening.
So the sun came down.
Right now I'm recording in thecar just so I don't have a low
key barking.
That was another one of thethings, like I couldn't record.
He was just barking all day.
And I didn't know where to do.
But anyway, going back, when Iwent back to my bedroom, I
(10:04):
started hearing soul, things,sounds, and I opened the window
and I'm, I am positive that itcomes from behind that fallen
tree.
So that means that my neighboris actually doing something.
So here they call it treesurgeons which are the people
that come and just take care offallen trees and or trees that
need to come down because maybethey're rotten or sick or
(10:27):
something.
I dunno, probably that there isa more technical name, but
that's the way that I explain itand I am so sure that it has
been taken care of.
So this morning I was looking atthat oh, who knows when this is
going to be fixed?
But then I looked at the birdsand said, wait, they're actually
(10:49):
taking advantage of this new.
Pulling into view this new kindof point of reference.
So of course they had toacknowledge, they had to
acknowledge the change becauseotherwise they would just try to
stand on a branch that was, thatis not there anymore.
Or they would hit the fence orsomething.
So of course they had toacknowledge this change.
(11:09):
But other than that, there isnothing else.
There's nothing else.
There's no going back.
I'm not in the bird's mind, butI'm thinking, okay, again, we're
assigning what we think, but thebirds look chill there.
Like they were like every day.
They looked like every day.
So for them it was like, yeah,this is the new normal.
(11:31):
That's it.
We are chill here.
We just talk to each other here.
It's okay.
And then.
Nothing else.
So if tomorrow, then that tree,that fallen tree is not there
anymore and the fence goes backto whatever it was before or is
a new fence or whatever, theywill just sit somewhere else.
(11:51):
It'll sit on the fence, on thenew fence or somewhere else,
like it will become a newnormal.
And they didn't lose theopportunity of this new
perspective.
When we have this change, whenwe have a change that happens
suddenly, or even any changereally, to be honest, like you
could apply this to everything.
(12:13):
When we have a change that wedon't like or that makes us feel
uncomfortable.
At that moment, we startthinking how to fix it.
We go back to lamenting what itwas before and then we.
Project into the future, thisnew normal that is a very
uncomfortable new normal,assigning all the meaning of
(12:36):
what it will be for us tocontinue in this new normal.
And in all those steps, in allthose steps that we do, there is
never an honoring of what isright now.
(12:56):
And saying, oh wait, I don'tknow how long it's going to last
this, but this is a newperspective.
So even from my window, I seethings that I couldn't see
before because the tree wasmassive.
So I'm seeing, other houses frombehind and other things.
And actually, I spoke with aneighbor this morning and he
(13:18):
said.
The next day I was just sitting,drinking my coffee and then all
of a sudden I felt like it was adifferent light.
It was different, it feltdifferent.
And then I just lookedeverywhere and I realized the
tree was not there anymore.
So we could have so manybenefits of this new perspective
(13:39):
if we only let us be open, evenif it is just to teach us
something, even if it is justfor us to see something, even if
it is just to pass the time,because we don't know.
Maybe this change could last anhour.
Maybe this change could last aday, a week, a year, 10 years,
it doesn't matter.
But when we get attached to whatit was, we never honor what is
(14:04):
and we lose.
This new opportunity for thisnew perspective that we didn't
have before.
We didn't, we couldn't, it wasimpossible to have this new
perspective before, just becauseit wasn't available to us, but
now it is.
So anyway, this is somethingsuper simple and probably heard
it so many times about thisgoing to the back go going, to
(14:27):
the past, going to the future,which is something that our
minds do all the time.
And I get it.
Our brains, the main function ofthe brain is to survive.
And of course is going to lookat the back.
Look at the back.
He's not going to look at theback.
He's going to look back forother situations that happened.
Just to see if it can match it.
And of course project it dostatistics and see if there's
(14:52):
any danger ahead or something.
So I get that our brains dothis, but we are not just our
brains and we have our eyes tosee, and we have our bodies to,
just take a deep breath, take afew deep breaths and just say
it's okay.
Like it's okay.
I know that this change.
(15:13):
I may not like, and this couldbe for anything.
It doesn't have a physicalchange.
It could be a mental change.
It could be you lose your job oryou have a fight with someone
that you care about, or you'retrying your best for ears with
somebody in your family or afriend or something.
And you have this relationshipand you try and you try and you
(15:33):
super try, and then it's justlook.
It's done.
There's nothing else to do.
Like, At least not now, maybenext year, but not now.
And it hit us, it hit us reallybad, this new change.
But if we just pause for asecond and just take a few deep
breaths and at least for amoment, just for a moment, we
(16:01):
try to not assign any meaningbecause again, when we assign
meaning, we, it's just biased.
We assign the meaning that wewant.
We could assign any meaning.
We could assign.
That is a fantastic change.
Or we can assign the meaningthat is a really crappy thing
that is happening and that isgoing to be really bad for us.
So when we assign the meaning,we are actually choosing, we are
(16:23):
choosing how we will feel whenwe assign this meaning.
So we are choosing how we willthink when, we think this thing
and we assign this meaning.
And then of course the thoughtthat we will have are going to
of course, be coherent withoutmeaning that we just assigned.
So we are actually choosing howwe were going to feel.
When we assign the meaning,usually we change, most of the
(16:46):
times we assign meaning with anegative connotation with a
negative impact on our lives.
So of course, it would be greatif you could see at it like, oh
wait.
Maybe I don't know it now, butthis is going to be fantastic.
Maybe it isn't comfortable now,but maybe this means that I will
have some more sunlight when I'mhaving my coffee in the morning.
(17:07):
Like it happened to my neighbor.
It is just, it's just trusting.
And I know, I know thatsometimes it is just hard to
trust and maybe, li life is justsometimes a bit chaotic
sometimes and a bit but we arealways in control of what we do
(17:29):
in the moment, the way thatwe're respond in the moment.
And if we're only reacting, ifwe're only reacting to what is
happening and.
Just letting our brain do whatour brain does because what it's
been trained to do for years andyears, then we are losing this
(17:50):
new perspective.
We are losing this opportunityto see with new eyes, literally
with new eyes is just, it's justcrazy.
And look, this morning.
Actually when we came back I washearing the birds like at the
(18:11):
front of my house and it wasjust insane.
It was this beautiful, like theywere all talking at the same
time.
It was so beautiful and I don'tknow if I heard that before.
That tree from the back fell.
So I don't know if maybe thoseare the birds from the back that
came here to the front, to this,near this other tree that's
(18:31):
here.
I don't know.
But there are so many kind oframifications.
There are so many things thatwill replicate and that will
bleed into all different areasfor one change.
And when we assign a meaning Anegative meaning.
If it's positive, then great.
(18:51):
Enjoy it.
You're going to feel amazing.
But if it is negative, then it'sso much better just to take
control of it and just, even ifwe don't wanna change or we feel
like we can't, which we can.
Like you can decide if you wanta chocolate ice cream or vanilla
ice cream, or an apple or a hamand cheese sandwich so you can
(19:13):
change your thoughts.
Okay?
So you can definitely change it.
But if you feel like in thatparticular day, then you have
less kind of control over yourmind and you feel like that is
something that you cannot do atthe moment, then you always have
your breath.
You always have your breath andyour body to help you with.
(19:35):
Not reacting, but actuallyresponding.
And the way to respond is tohave a pause, like a micro pause
between the stimuli and thereaction, the action and the
reaction.
So when you react is instant,but when you respond, you take
that, like breathe in.
(19:56):
And then that mini pause.
Helps you choose, because whenyou react, it's just automatic.
That is a programming.
That is something that is is inyour subconscious, so it's just
reacting.
It's responding but in a veryinstant and automatic way, which
is not you choosing, maybe youchose it in the past, but maybe
you don't choose it now.
(20:17):
So you can always pause havesome breaths and just maybe.
Maybe be open to the possibilitythat there is something that
this new change will bring toyou, will bring to you a new
perspective, will bring to younew skills, will bring to you
something really cool that mayhappen tomorrow that you don't
(20:38):
know right now in this veryinstant.
So there you go.
That was my, my thing for today.
And I thought that it was goingto be like five minutes, but I
have no idea how long I've beenrecording.
I have my phone in airplane modeand in do not disturb, and I
actually, I have, when I put doNot Disturb on my phone, I have
(21:00):
a picture of Loki when he justarrived and he's so cute.
So cute.
Anyway, I hope you have abeautiful week and I'll speak to
you next week.
I don't know, maybe sooner.
Who knows this new vibe goingon?
But definitely next week.
So I hope you have a beautifulday today, night, wherever you
(21:20):
are, and that you will haveopportunities to, to try this.
Opportunities to try, even if itis just simple things, like he
thought it was going to besunny, and then it starts
raining.
Like instead of being pissed atit, just what can you do about
it?
What can you do about the waythat you feel?
Again, remember we spoke aboutthis like bazillion years ago,
(21:44):
but remember that when you thinka thought and an emotion comes
as a chemical response in yourbody, it only lasts 90 seconds.
So if, when you're angry, it'lllast more than 90 seconds, and
that means that you're havingmore thoughts, that of course
they are coherent to that firstthought.
That keeps.
(22:05):
That same emotion or somewhatthat same emotion in a loop, in
a kind of close loop.
So if you have a thought thatyou don't like and you're
feeling, you know, in a bad wayor in a way that you don't wanna
feel or is uncomfortable, thenjust choose what you would want
to be thinking, and then giveyourself a breather.
(22:27):
Give yourself a few deepbreaths.
And just for 90 seconds you caneven set a timer on your phone.
You can just 90 seconds, putyour hand on your heart.
Just be on a place where you canbe by yourself, even that's just
the bathroom.
Or just do it in your mind.
Like it's fine.
You don't have to react in themoment, just take some time out,
you know, just timeout, youknow, like you would do with
(22:49):
kids like timeout.
Okay.
Just take those 90 seconds,timeout and.
I'm sure that you will, you'llperceive something different,
and it is just that it is thisrepetition of every time.
It's just breaking the pattern,in the moment, and then choosing
something different.
And you'll see that step bystep, like bit by bit.
(23:09):
It's going to be easier, it'sgoing to be wider.
These poles in between thestimuli and the.
The response, this reaction,this automatic response.
And if there is a day that youfeel that it's just harder than
usual, it's okay.
It's okay.
Look, it's not I'll tell youwhat I was thinking when I was
having my driving lessons lastyear.
I thought that there, there werea few days that I felt that I
(23:33):
was just going back to squareone.
Oh my goodness, what's going on?
I felt that I had it and thenI'm back in score one.
You're not like, whateverhappens the, this is thing that
helped me a lot.
I dunno if you felt, if it'llhelp you, but you can try it,
you can always try it.
I put in numbers to everythingjust because it's easier.
It's a very graphic way ofmeasuring things.
(23:54):
So what I used to do was, okay,so I will stop.
Just having a feel of me goingback to square, one of me
feeling amazing, like the mostskillful driver in the world,
and just put a number.
So in that case, what I chosewas percentage.
So instead of putting like oneto 10, I would say, okay let's
talk about percentage.
Like from zero being like squareone I have no idea what to do.
(24:19):
And a hundred being.
How I want to feel when I drive.
And I'm not talking about veryskillful driver, driver that has
been driving for 25 years.
Because of course that will takeme a bit of time.
But what I mean is having thetest I never wanted to know
enough to pass the test.
I have kids, I have family, andI value my life so much.
(24:41):
So I didn't wanna risk it.
So I wanted to actually be agood driver.
Good conscious, respectfulpaying attention kind of driver.
So that was my a hundredpercent.
So for whatever you want foryourself regarding that.
Then just put a number from oneto a hundred.
(25:03):
And then how do you feel today?
So every time I came back home.
From the lessons I felt, okay,how do I feel today in
percentage?
And it just came to me, justpopped in my head, like 70% or
40% but from that moment, evenif I went from 70% to 45%, which
is, it's just crazy, but thatwas a number that kind of popped
(25:24):
into my head.
It didn't matter because I wasnever back.
I.
In Square one because there areso many things that could
happen.
I could be in the time of themonth or it could be I don't
know, maybe a bit tired that dayor maybe I didn't sleep well
that night or something, or itwas raining a lot.
Because here in Be Rains a lot,so anyway so there you have a
(25:47):
few tools here.
To change perspective and justhere and there, a few tweak here
and there and see what works foryou.
So have a lovely week and I'llspeak to you soon.
Bye Bye.
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