May 15, 2024 • 27 mins
Feeling alone in a bustling world is a paradox many of us know all too well. My journey through the deserts of despair and the search for a connection that transcends human imperfection is laid bare in a conversation with the insightful Kandi Anderson Ferris. We unravel the raw emotions of loneliness, a silent battle for a staggering number of individuals, particularly young adults. Together, we consider the need to prepare our children for life's inevitable isolation, challenging the glossy Hollywood portrayal of flawless relationships, and offer a perspective of companionship that promises unconditional love and support—especially when the road gets rocky.
The narrative then shifts to a place of hope and solace in God's love, where I share my experiences of finding true connection in what felt like an endless sea of faces. With Kandi's wisdom, we illuminate the lives of biblical figures like David, whose heartfelt relationship with God demonstrates that we are all welcome in the realm of divine grace—flaws and all. This episode is not just about understanding loneliness but also about discovering the profound companionship available to us through faith, a relationship that patiently fills the void with a love that knows no bounds. Join us as we explore the promise that even in our loneliest moments, we are never truly alone.
- If you would like to be a guest and share your story, click this link: https://thepromoter.org/story/
Thanks for Listening, and subscribe to hear a new episode each week!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Announcer (00:01):
It's time now to get the hell out of your life.
A weekly broadcast with realpeople sharing real struggles
and offering real hope.
Today's show will encourage,inspire and empower you to face
life's challenges with a boldconfidence and renewed hope.
Now let's join our host, ronMyers.
The promoter.
Ron Meyers (00:22):
Hello, my friends, it is so good to be with you
today.
Today is a great day.
To make it a great day, my nameis Ron Myers, I'm your host,
and this is the show thatencourages, inspires and
empowers individuals to becomeeverything they were created to
be.
Well, today's show is a veryspecial show to me because it
(00:44):
brought me back to a lot ofmemories that they're hard to
think about, but it was thoserough days where I was so lonely
, so out of it, so lonely.
That's really the only world.
It's like nothing I could docould fill the void in my life.
Nobody understood me, and I didsome research today.
(01:07):
According to a 2020 survey, 36%of American adults report
feeling lonely frequently or allthe time.
Now, loneliness is reallyprevalent among the younger
adults, with 61% of thosebetween age 18 and 25.
(01:28):
Friends, what if I could bringyou a show today that, when you
listen to it, it will encourageyou and realize that every human
being on this planet goesthrough a stage of loneliness?
So I went back to my archivesand got one of my favorite
programs from one of my favoriteguests, candy Anderson Ferris.
(01:49):
It's called my Soul Needs aFriend.
I think sometimes, as adults,one of the things that we fail
to do is tell our kids thatthere will be times in life
where things will happen.
Circumstances will come intheir life that will be
devastating.
They'll be lonely, they'll beabandoned.
(02:12):
They will think that there isnobody out there that cares
about them, and sometimes weknow what that could possibly
lead to and we don't want that.
As adults, we tell our childrenabout going to school, college,
getting a good job, honesty,integrity all the things that we
(02:34):
need for a good, productivelife.
But perhaps we've left out oneof the most important things is
preparing them for that day ofloneliness, of isolation, of
despair.
And it comes in everybody'slife, and I'm skeptical of these
Hollywood fairy tale romancesthat a lot of couples seem to
(02:59):
have, you know, their perfectsoulmate?
I don't know.
I'm a little skeptical becauseof my years of experience.
I have found that we are stillhuman.
We say we do dumb things, wemake the other person upset or
mad and selfish behavior in bothparts take place.
That just is life, becausethat's how the human beings are.
(03:22):
We try so hard to do the rightthing, but sometimes the right
thing leads to doing nothingright but everything wrong, and
then you have regrets, you sayyou're sorry, but they never
forget and it often leads tobitterness or resentment.
So is there a friend for thesoul that doesn't remember all
the things we did wrong?
Is there a friend for the soulthat doesn't remember all the
(03:44):
things we did wrong?
Is there a friend for the soulthat will love us
unconditionally?
Is there a friend for the soulthat will hold us when we have
an unexpected loss of a lovedone, a family member, our dear
friend of a loved one, a familymember or dear friend?
(04:05):
Is there a friend for the soulthat will hold our hand as we go
through a dry desert of despair, discouragement and not
understanding what life is about?
I brought in today a goodfriend of mine, author, speaker
and writer, candy AndersonFerris, to talk about this
(04:25):
subject and friends.
I think you're going to beencouraged with today's show.
Hi, candy, how are you hey?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (04:33):
how are you Ron?
Ron Meyers (04:34):
I'm doing fine.
Such a good subject.
My soul needs a friend, itreally is.
Yeah, and you heard my opening.
What are your thoughts?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (04:47):
Okay, first of all, church is a place
that we can find community, andthat's what we all need is
community.
But sometimes, even on a Sundaymorning, we present ourselves
as happy.
Everything's perfect.
You know, we've been in a fighton the way to church.
But when we get out immediatelyour face goes to a smile and
all is well with the world.
And so we put on a mask manytimes, even entering the church,
(05:09):
and sometimes it breaks downwhen we have one on one
discipling or discipleshiptraining, which I think is very
important in the church.
That leads us to a place ofknowing Christ more.
He said he would be our friend.
We would no longer call himservant, no longer be servants,
but call him friend.
And so, um, it's important toum know that you can be in a
(05:34):
room full of people uh, you canbe in a room full of loud people
in your home uh, just everybodyhaving a ball and you feel lost
and alone and you cannot make aconnection with anyone.
And that's at the point that, asI've heard said from the little
(05:58):
girl in AG, america's GotTalent, that has cancer, she
said sometimes God is on thebathroom floor.
The lower we get, the more wehave need of a savior, and he's
oftentimes the only place thatwe're going to find.
That God shaped hole can befilled by his presence.
(06:20):
I've been there, you've beenthere, you've been there.
We all know that things don'tpresent themselves well to make
us unafraid, insecure, lonely.
It doesn't fill us, and so thescripture I read today says
awake, o sleeper.
We need to wake up to the factthat the only thing that will
(06:42):
fill that God-shaped hole is Godhimself, through Christ Jesus.
Ron Meyers (06:46):
A lot of people's response is I tried that God
thing.
It didn't work for me.
But people have to be patient.
It's not a snap of a finger, isit?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (06:53):
It's not feeling, it's fact.
And the more time you abide inhim and stay in his word, you
have to get in that word.
And when you get in the wordI'm saying you start out with
Holy Spirit, give me ears tohear and eyes to see.
And I'm telling you it's aliving word and he will have a
word specifically for you whenyou trust him and you believe
(07:17):
and your eyes are focused on him.
I'm going to tell you a littleportion of my testimony was when
I was in high school and afterI became saved.
I say this humbly I was popularin school, I had cheerleader,
who's who, all that kind ofstuff, great grades in
everything, student bodypresident, and I was alone, very
(07:38):
much alone, and so some thingshappened, and during that time I
think Twiggy was probably themost admired person in the world
, and so I for some reason gotcaught up in the whole idea of
food replacing, or lack of there, replacing what I needed to be
(08:01):
even better and less alone.
To be even better and less alone, because even in the midst of
being popular, a lot of timesyou feel really bereft and alone
.
And so I started with thisdownward spiral of being 110
pounds getting down to 88 poundsand was hospitalized for
anorexia, and my parents justtold me I needed to get well,
(08:21):
and so that transitioned intobulimia and I became very, very
ill.
And my parents just told me Ineeded to get well, and so that
transitioned into bulimia and Ibecame very, very ill.
And so the only thing, the onlyone that kept me alive, because
I had no other recourse, wasGod himself and my faith, and I
would walk for hours.
(08:41):
It took a long time, but Iwould walk for hours.
It took a long time, but Iwould walk for hours, and my
song that filled my heart was Icome to the garden alone and he
walks with me and he talks withme and he tells me, I am his own
.
So, having come out of that, Iknow that I will always and
forever deal with weaknesses inmy life.
(09:04):
And so it's not a moment bymoment thing with God, or I mean
it is a moment by moment thingwith God, not even a one day at
a time thing.
For me, it is a one moment bymoment experience with my father
and short breath prayers,knowing he's with me, regardless
of anything, how I fail.
(09:25):
Knowing God is to be fullyknown and fully loved.
That is an incredibleunderstanding that sometimes we
have to not feel it but by onfact know that he died for me
while I was yet a sinner.
He has made provision for mewhen I mess up and his mercies
(09:49):
are new every morning and I cantrust him.
And when I'm at my lowest, Ilay on that floor and I tell him
exactly how I feel no holesbarred, I'm upset, I can't do
this, I am not happy with theway things are.
So, god, I need you.
I can remember Roy Wyckoff atWAOY and his wife had cancer.
(10:12):
I remember him getting to apoint when he was in the middle
of a drugstore and him justverbally allow, saying God, I
can't, I need you.
And that's where the friend,the friend of the soul, comes in
and fills you with a peace thatpasses all understanding, and I
(10:33):
have no way other to explain itthan you have to have a
personal relationship with JesusChrist.
Ron Meyers (10:45):
Speak to that person now that says they just can't
comprehend somebody actuallyloving them unconditionally
because they done so many badthings.
I've got so much baggage.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (10:59):
That's who he works best with.
That's exactly right.
The rest of it.
There's so many people who areso thinking they've got it all
together and they're good andthey don't have a need of God.
We all have sinned and fallenshort of the glory of God.
There is not anyone who's lived.
We were born into sin and he isthe provision.
(11:19):
When I was also in high school,the way I came to know the Lord
is that a lay renewal group camethrough and we went out on a
farm and the gentleman explainedthat there was a chasm here's
me and here's God and there's achasm.
And the cross became the way tocross the chasm and that I
(11:42):
couldn't do it because sincouldn't touch God because it
would dirty him.
So he made a way through JesusChrist, his son, and once I got
that and that he was on thethrone of my life, I couldn't I
mean you could hardly contain myjoy and I didn't.
It wasn't.
I have to be obedient to God.
(12:02):
I have to do what he says.
I'm under this.
You know, controlling God itwas I get to.
Ron Meyers (12:09):
I get to.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (12:10):
I get to and we get to be, as the word
says, fools for Christ.
And what looks foolish to theworld is what God uses.
I mean, he takes the foolishthings of the world to confound
the wise.
And you know, it's in ourweakness.
We don't have to be strong,he's our strength.
(12:32):
Sometimes we think we have tobe strong, and in our weakness
is when God works the best.
It says in our weakness he isstrong, he shows his strength.
So it's very oftentimes that weneed to admit that we are
lonely and alone.
And then, for those who rightnow are on the good side, we
(12:55):
need to pray for our brothersand sisters in Christ who feel
isolated and who feel alone.
In fact, I just read an articletoday of a young man who was a
valedictorian and when he was ayoung boy he had a pile of books
, was headed home, dropped hisbooks.
Well, he didn't drop the books.
(13:15):
A mean group of kids came andknocked his glasses off and
threw the books down.
But there was one boy that cameby him and thought what in the
world does he have all his books?
He must be a real nerd, but hehelped him and he became his
best friend.
God presented him to that youngman at such a time as this, and
that's the way God loves us andis our friend through other
(13:39):
people as well, because that boythat befriended him was the one
that this young man talkedabout in his speech.
As a valedictorian, he said Iwas on my way home to kill
myself.
Ron Meyers (13:53):
Wow.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (13:54):
And he said I had taken all my books so
my mama wouldn't have to dealwith it.
And he said but this young mancame along, he became my friend
and pushed me to be the person Iam today.
Announcer (14:05):
Wow.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (14:06):
So it is also the provision that God
gives us through other peopleand I want to be that person for
someone I know.
Other people have been thatperson for me.
Ron Meyers (14:19):
Look what's happening now in the world and
the division between people.
I think people are looking forthat friend more now than at any
other time in history.
I didn't come to God when I wasfeeling good.
No, I came to God, like yousaid, when I hit bottom and
everybody eventually is going tohit bottom.
Kandi Anderson Ferri (14:40):
Absolutely .
My prayer for my children isalways bringing their mountains
down, their valleys up and makelevel their paths.
But someone told me said youhave to have the ups and downs
to know that God is in control.
Nothing grows on themountaintop if there is a ridge
around the mountaintop where thegreenery stops, and so if we
(15:02):
stay on the mountaintop we stopgrowing.
It's in the valley where thebeautiful things take place, and
where the lush greenery is isbecause that's where we learn
really who God is.
If you read the Psalms, that'sone of the biggest things.
Where I know God is, my friendis.
I'll just go stay in the PsalmsI'll read Because David felt
(15:27):
alone and he just knew that Godwas his help.
David sinned, so everybody whomakes that as a point of God
won't want me needs to go lookat the real people in the Bible.
Ron Meyers (15:42):
God's description of David that he was a man after
his own heart.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (15:47):
Man after God's own heart, and that was
God's description.
Ron Meyers (15:50):
That was God's description.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (15:51):
Yes, and he had failed so many times.
Look at everybody.
There's probably not, but maybeone or two people, three, maybe
characters in the Bible that wedon't see.
That has some source of failure.
Yeah, and so I'm very glad thatGod is authentic in his
writings to us.
Ron Meyers (16:13):
What's some hope for somebody out there that is
looking for a friend for theirsoul?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (16:18):
First of all, don't give up.
There is a God who loves you.
He's not in the Old TestamentGod, he's not a long period ago.
I know, because I talked withhim this morning and I talked
about you this morning with him,that there's somebody listening
that has a broken heart, islonely, doesn't feel life is
(16:43):
worth living anymore and he sayscome to me, all you who are
weary, and I will give you rest.
And he says come, learn from me, take my yoke, my burden is
light and he wants to give youthat kind of life.
All you have to do is justlisten for his voice.
(17:05):
Not look to man, but look up.
Your hope draweth nigh and Ipray that someone across your
path today that will give youthe tools and the joy that comes
from knowing Christ Jesus.
Ron Meyers (17:23):
Well, that was good Candy.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (17:24):
I will say this, though I have hardly
watched the news it's the bestthing I've ever done, absolutely
, that's people are so negativeanymore and it's it's we're
finding fault with everything,when we need to be looking at
the, the Savior, who's comingback.
God wins.
I mean, that's why you wantyour friend.
God wins, and it's not a battlebetween flesh and blood.
(17:50):
This is not what's going on andwe need not be afraid because
people say well, you know,financially we may fail.
Well, scripture says I've neverseen the righteous forsaken or
seed begging bread.
There are.
He said he's never leave us,he'll never forsake us.
This is in God's plan.
We need to stay the course, andhis word says how.
(18:14):
How do we know that we loveJesus, we follow his commands
and we love one another?
Ron Meyers (18:24):
When I return my final thought helping you
overcome loneliness.
Announcer (18:29):
You're listening to get the hell out of your Life
with your host, ron Myers.
Real stories, real strugglesand real hope.
Speaker 5 (18:39):
Spending time with God should be a good thing.
It should be enjoyable, evenexciting.
But some people approach Godwith the wrong attitude.
Sometimes people have atendency to get what's called
paranoid.
Their misconceptions about Godactually keep them from getting
close to God.
They're afraid God won't acceptthem because of their sin.
You just stink to high heaven.
They think they'll be rejectedbecause of their disobedience.
You get some kind of pleasureout of not listening to me.
(19:04):
They think God is so wise andintelligent that he'd just look
down on them.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (19:06):
The guy's a lamb chopped short of a mixed
grill, and wise and intelligentthat he had just looked down on
them.
Speaker 5 (19:09):
The guy's a lamb chopped short of a mixed grill,
and when they dare bring theirrequest to God, he won't be too
enthused.
This ain't no supermarket boy.
If this sounds familiar to you,then you've been listening to
the devil.
He's always trying to convinceyou that God is offended by you,
but when Jesus died on thecross, he gave you access to God
at any time, especially whenyou've sinned.
So get rid of all thosemisconceptions.
God's a lot more friendly thanyou might think.
I'd love to hear about otherpeople's problems and remember
(19:31):
when you blow it the Bible saysGod is slow to anger and
abundant in mercy.
Speaker 6 (19:40):
See, I think that's beautiful.
We would like to express ourgratitude to Coffee News for
their support of this program.
Are you tired of scrollingthrough the same old news feeds
every morning?
Then switch things up withCoffee News.
Our publication is filled withinteresting stories, brain
teasers and uplifting quotesthat are sure to brighten your
day.
And now you can access CoffeeNews anytime, anywhere, by
visiting our website.
So whether you're sipping yourmorning coffee at your favorite
(20:03):
cafe or browsing online fromyour desk, we've got you covered
.
Start your day off right withCoffee News at
readcoffeenewsonlinecom.
Speaker 4 (20:23):
With my heart.
He never fails when I'm at myweakest.
I will trust in Jesus, alwaysin my heart.
He knows the one who goesbefore me.
Ron Meyers (20:38):
Welcome back listeners.
I love that conversation withCandy.
She said a part in there aboutbeing in a crowd.
But yet you that you feel alone.
I went through that.
I could be in these largecrowds and I could be in these
crowds.
I was alone, I was isolated.
I was actually thinking how Iwas going to exit, what I was
(21:05):
doing.
I was getting tired of it, thefun was gone and I knew God was
pulling at my heart.
But I would talk to people hey,hi, ron, how you doing?
Oh, I'm doing fine, how are you?
And in the back of my mind Iwas wondering when is this going
to be over?
I know one day it's going to begone.
I know the festivals are goingto be gone, the carnival rides
(21:26):
are going to be gone.
I know they're going to be gonebecause I'm going to make them
gone, but I don't know when I'mgoing to make them gone, because
I can't make them gone nowbecause I need the money.
So it was that battle.
And it's like you really arelonely because there is nobody
you can talk to, because nobodyunderstands all the hundreds of
different things that you haveto think about, because when you
(21:49):
close one thing.
It affects another thing.
It affects your livelihood,your income, your everything is
changed.
So you have to be on the rightpage.
I had to be, and that's when Ijust started getting closer and
closer and closer to God.
I had to because my lifedepended on it, my family's life
(22:09):
depended on it, my dreams, myhopes.
I was writing it all.
I was placing everything I hadon Jesus.
I said everything I had onJesus.
I said I'm rolling the dice,it's you and me, jesus.
And I did it.
And it was difficult at first,but it was fun, it was peaceful.
(22:29):
It was difficult because Ireally had to deal with not
thinking sometimes that I couldeven have a relationship with
Jesus here, could even have arelationship with Jesus here.
The mud wrestling, bikinipromoter, beer selling guy is
now asking Jesus for help andman, he does it.
(22:50):
He does it to everyone.
There is no one out there inthis world that is so special.
We're all equal.
We're all equal, and God's eyesis this If you have felt lonely
, maybe you are going throughnow, you're missing someone so
much I know I can relate to that.
(23:11):
The only thing, the only thing,and I tried everything, friends,
I mean everything.
You put your imagination to itthing.
You put your imagination to it.
The only thing that was thehealing medicine to my soul was
Jesus, and he loves to do that.
Because when he does what hedoes best, and that is to
minister to us, to us, tominister to us and let us feel
(23:36):
peace, then what happens?
You become a believer.
Feel peace.
Then what happens?
You become a believer.
Your faith begins to grow dayin and day out and soon you
become a promoter.
You're telling the other peoplewhat Jesus did at the worst
times of your life.
So if you're in that littlevalley right now, as Candy said,
(24:00):
that is where you will alwaysfind the friend for your soul.
Announcer (24:06):
You're listening to Get the Hell Out of your Life
with your host, ron Myers.
Real stories, real strugglesand real hope.
Speaker 7 (24:15):
What's your story?
We're looking for stories ofhope and overcoming life's
struggles with God's grace.
Your story validates God's love, mercy, restoration and
forgiveness.
We want to help you share yourstory with the world.
Visit our website,thepromoterorg, and click on the
Share your Story link andsubmit your story.
(24:37):
Your testimony of God's amazinggrace will change a person's
destiny for eternity.
Announcer (24:45):
Getting encouragement is important and it helps us
overcome our fears and gives usthe courage to face life's
challenges.
To receive weekly messages ofencouragement, all you need to
do is text INSPIRE to888-527-1223.
That's 888-527-1223.
That's 888-527-1223.
(25:05):
Our messages are intended toinspire and empower you on your
life journey.
Remember, life is moreenjoyable when you're inspired.
Speaker 6 (25:15):
Ron will be back in a minute to close out today's
show.
We want to remind you today ofthe last words of Jesus it is
finished.
What is finished, the finishedwork of Jesus, refers to the
complete and finalaccomplishment of salvation
through his death andresurrection.
It means that Jesus has doneeverything necessary for our
(25:37):
forgiveness, redemption andreconciliation with God.
Through His sacrifice on thecross, Jesus paid the price for
our sins once and for all,providing total forgiveness and
cleansing.
This finished work of Jesusmeans that we no longer need to
strive or work to earn God'sfavor or forgiveness.
We can rest in the assurancethat our salvation is secure and
(26:01):
that we are fully accepted byGod because of what Jesus has
done for us.
Now back to Ron.
Ron Meyers (26:13):
Well, friends, my time is up and remember today is
a great day.
To make it a great day.
Be determined that you aregoing to have a change in your
life.
You have found a soul for yourfriend.
His name is Jesus.
Have those daily conversations.
Just as Candy said, be open, behonest, be transparent.
(26:36):
God loves a dialogue.
The dialogue is where heministers to us.
So let Jesus minister to youtoday and remember that God has
an incredible plan just for you.
Check out my website,thepromoterorg Until next week.
This is Ron Myers, remindingyou that I love you.
(26:58):
Vaughn Myers, reminding youthat I love you.
Jesus loves you, and when yougive Jesus your heart, he will
become the true friend for yoursoul.
Announcer (27:19):
Get the Hell Out of your Life is underwritten by the
Christmas City Gift Show.
We invite you to come shop withover 255 vendors from all over
the United States from November8th through the 10th inside the
Coast Convention Center locatedon the beach in Biloxi,
Mississippi.
You can find more informationat ChristmasCityGiftShowcom.
Thanks for listening, and ifyou would like to share your
(27:43):
story of what God has done inyour life or listen to previous
episodes, please visit ourwebsite, thepromoterorg.
Join us next week for anotherepisode of Get the Hell Out of
your Life Real stories, realstruggles and real hope.
It's time now to get the hell out of your life.
A weekly broadcast with realpeople sharing real struggles
and offering real hope.
Today's show will encourage,inspire and empower you to face
life's challenges with a boldconfidence and renewed hope.
Now let's join our host, ronMyers.
The promoter.
Ron Meyers (00:22):
Hello, my friends, it is so good to be with you
today.
Today is a great day.
To make it a great day, my nameis Ron Myers, I'm your host,
and this is the show thatencourages, inspires and
empowers individuals to becomeeverything they were created to
be.
Well, today's show is a veryspecial show to me because it
(00:44):
brought me back to a lot ofmemories that they're hard to
think about, but it was thoserough days where I was so lonely
, so out of it, so lonely.
That's really the only world.
It's like nothing I could docould fill the void in my life.
Nobody understood me, and I didsome research today.
(01:07):
According to a 2020 survey, 36%of American adults report
feeling lonely frequently or allthe time.
Now, loneliness is reallyprevalent among the younger
adults, with 61% of thosebetween age 18 and 25.
(01:28):
Friends, what if I could bringyou a show today that, when you
listen to it, it will encourageyou and realize that every human
being on this planet goesthrough a stage of loneliness?
So I went back to my archivesand got one of my favorite
programs from one of my favoriteguests, candy Anderson Ferris.
(01:49):
It's called my Soul Needs aFriend.
I think sometimes, as adults,one of the things that we fail
to do is tell our kids thatthere will be times in life
where things will happen.
Circumstances will come intheir life that will be
devastating.
They'll be lonely, they'll beabandoned.
(02:12):
They will think that there isnobody out there that cares
about them, and sometimes weknow what that could possibly
lead to and we don't want that.
As adults, we tell our childrenabout going to school, college,
getting a good job, honesty,integrity all the things that we
(02:34):
need for a good, productivelife.
But perhaps we've left out oneof the most important things is
preparing them for that day ofloneliness, of isolation, of
despair.
And it comes in everybody'slife, and I'm skeptical of these
Hollywood fairy tale romancesthat a lot of couples seem to
(02:59):
have, you know, their perfectsoulmate?
I don't know.
I'm a little skeptical becauseof my years of experience.
I have found that we are stillhuman.
We say we do dumb things, wemake the other person upset or
mad and selfish behavior in bothparts take place.
That just is life, becausethat's how the human beings are.
(03:22):
We try so hard to do the rightthing, but sometimes the right
thing leads to doing nothingright but everything wrong, and
then you have regrets, you sayyou're sorry, but they never
forget and it often leads tobitterness or resentment.
So is there a friend for thesoul that doesn't remember all
the things we did wrong?
Is there a friend for the soulthat doesn't remember all the
(03:44):
things we did wrong?
Is there a friend for the soulthat will love us
unconditionally?
Is there a friend for the soulthat will hold us when we have
an unexpected loss of a lovedone, a family member, our dear
friend of a loved one, a familymember or dear friend?
(04:05):
Is there a friend for the soulthat will hold our hand as we go
through a dry desert of despair, discouragement and not
understanding what life is about?
I brought in today a goodfriend of mine, author, speaker
and writer, candy AndersonFerris, to talk about this
(04:25):
subject and friends.
I think you're going to beencouraged with today's show.
Hi, candy, how are you hey?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (04:33):
how are you Ron?
Ron Meyers (04:34):
I'm doing fine.
Such a good subject.
My soul needs a friend, itreally is.
Yeah, and you heard my opening.
What are your thoughts?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (04:47):
Okay, first of all, church is a place
that we can find community, andthat's what we all need is
community.
But sometimes, even on a Sundaymorning, we present ourselves
as happy.
Everything's perfect.
You know, we've been in a fighton the way to church.
But when we get out immediatelyour face goes to a smile and
all is well with the world.
And so we put on a mask manytimes, even entering the church,
(05:09):
and sometimes it breaks downwhen we have one on one
discipling or discipleshiptraining, which I think is very
important in the church.
That leads us to a place ofknowing Christ more.
He said he would be our friend.
We would no longer call himservant, no longer be servants,
but call him friend.
And so, um, it's important toum know that you can be in a
(05:34):
room full of people uh, you canbe in a room full of loud people
in your home uh, just everybodyhaving a ball and you feel lost
and alone and you cannot make aconnection with anyone.
And that's at the point that, asI've heard said from the little
(05:58):
girl in AG, america's GotTalent, that has cancer, she
said sometimes God is on thebathroom floor.
The lower we get, the more wehave need of a savior, and he's
oftentimes the only place thatwe're going to find.
That God shaped hole can befilled by his presence.
(06:20):
I've been there, you've beenthere, you've been there.
We all know that things don'tpresent themselves well to make
us unafraid, insecure, lonely.
It doesn't fill us, and so thescripture I read today says
awake, o sleeper.
We need to wake up to the factthat the only thing that will
(06:42):
fill that God-shaped hole is Godhimself, through Christ Jesus.
Ron Meyers (06:46):
A lot of people's response is I tried that God
thing.
It didn't work for me.
But people have to be patient.
It's not a snap of a finger, isit?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (06:53):
It's not feeling, it's fact.
And the more time you abide inhim and stay in his word, you
have to get in that word.
And when you get in the wordI'm saying you start out with
Holy Spirit, give me ears tohear and eyes to see.
And I'm telling you it's aliving word and he will have a
word specifically for you whenyou trust him and you believe
(07:17):
and your eyes are focused on him.
I'm going to tell you a littleportion of my testimony was when
I was in high school and afterI became saved.
I say this humbly I was popularin school, I had cheerleader,
who's who, all that kind ofstuff, great grades in
everything, student bodypresident, and I was alone, very
(07:38):
much alone, and so some thingshappened, and during that time I
think Twiggy was probably themost admired person in the world
, and so I for some reason gotcaught up in the whole idea of
food replacing, or lack of there, replacing what I needed to be
(08:01):
even better and less alone.
To be even better and less alone, because even in the midst of
being popular, a lot of timesyou feel really bereft and alone
.
And so I started with thisdownward spiral of being 110
pounds getting down to 88 poundsand was hospitalized for
anorexia, and my parents justtold me I needed to get well,
(08:21):
and so that transitioned intobulimia and I became very, very
ill.
And my parents just told me Ineeded to get well, and so that
transitioned into bulimia and Ibecame very, very ill.
And so the only thing, the onlyone that kept me alive, because
I had no other recourse, wasGod himself and my faith, and I
would walk for hours.
(08:41):
It took a long time, but Iwould walk for hours.
It took a long time, but Iwould walk for hours, and my
song that filled my heart was Icome to the garden alone and he
walks with me and he talks withme and he tells me, I am his own
.
So, having come out of that, Iknow that I will always and
forever deal with weaknesses inmy life.
(09:04):
And so it's not a moment bymoment thing with God, or I mean
it is a moment by moment thingwith God, not even a one day at
a time thing.
For me, it is a one moment bymoment experience with my father
and short breath prayers,knowing he's with me, regardless
of anything, how I fail.
(09:25):
Knowing God is to be fullyknown and fully loved.
That is an incredibleunderstanding that sometimes we
have to not feel it but by onfact know that he died for me
while I was yet a sinner.
He has made provision for mewhen I mess up and his mercies
(09:49):
are new every morning and I cantrust him.
And when I'm at my lowest, Ilay on that floor and I tell him
exactly how I feel no holesbarred, I'm upset, I can't do
this, I am not happy with theway things are.
So, god, I need you.
I can remember Roy Wyckoff atWAOY and his wife had cancer.
(10:12):
I remember him getting to apoint when he was in the middle
of a drugstore and him justverbally allow, saying God, I
can't, I need you.
And that's where the friend,the friend of the soul, comes in
and fills you with a peace thatpasses all understanding, and I
(10:33):
have no way other to explain itthan you have to have a
personal relationship with JesusChrist.
Ron Meyers (10:45):
Speak to that person now that says they just can't
comprehend somebody actuallyloving them unconditionally
because they done so many badthings.
I've got so much baggage.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (10:59):
That's who he works best with.
That's exactly right.
The rest of it.
There's so many people who areso thinking they've got it all
together and they're good andthey don't have a need of God.
We all have sinned and fallenshort of the glory of God.
There is not anyone who's lived.
We were born into sin and he isthe provision.
(11:19):
When I was also in high school,the way I came to know the Lord
is that a lay renewal group camethrough and we went out on a
farm and the gentleman explainedthat there was a chasm here's
me and here's God and there's achasm.
And the cross became the way tocross the chasm and that I
(11:42):
couldn't do it because sincouldn't touch God because it
would dirty him.
So he made a way through JesusChrist, his son, and once I got
that and that he was on thethrone of my life, I couldn't I
mean you could hardly contain myjoy and I didn't.
It wasn't.
I have to be obedient to God.
(12:02):
I have to do what he says.
I'm under this.
You know, controlling God itwas I get to.
Ron Meyers (12:09):
I get to.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (12:10):
I get to and we get to be, as the word
says, fools for Christ.
And what looks foolish to theworld is what God uses.
I mean, he takes the foolishthings of the world to confound
the wise.
And you know, it's in ourweakness.
We don't have to be strong,he's our strength.
(12:32):
Sometimes we think we have tobe strong, and in our weakness
is when God works the best.
It says in our weakness he isstrong, he shows his strength.
So it's very oftentimes that weneed to admit that we are
lonely and alone.
And then, for those who rightnow are on the good side, we
(12:55):
need to pray for our brothersand sisters in Christ who feel
isolated and who feel alone.
In fact, I just read an articletoday of a young man who was a
valedictorian and when he was ayoung boy he had a pile of books
, was headed home, dropped hisbooks.
Well, he didn't drop the books.
(13:15):
A mean group of kids came andknocked his glasses off and
threw the books down.
But there was one boy that cameby him and thought what in the
world does he have all his books?
He must be a real nerd, but hehelped him and he became his
best friend.
God presented him to that youngman at such a time as this, and
that's the way God loves us andis our friend through other
(13:39):
people as well, because that boythat befriended him was the one
that this young man talkedabout in his speech.
As a valedictorian, he said Iwas on my way home to kill
myself.
Ron Meyers (13:53):
Wow.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (13:54):
And he said I had taken all my books so
my mama wouldn't have to dealwith it.
And he said but this young mancame along, he became my friend
and pushed me to be the person Iam today.
Announcer (14:05):
Wow.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (14:06):
So it is also the provision that God
gives us through other peopleand I want to be that person for
someone I know.
Other people have been thatperson for me.
Ron Meyers (14:19):
Look what's happening now in the world and
the division between people.
I think people are looking forthat friend more now than at any
other time in history.
I didn't come to God when I wasfeeling good.
No, I came to God, like yousaid, when I hit bottom and
everybody eventually is going tohit bottom.
Kandi Anderson Ferri (14:40):
Absolutely .
My prayer for my children isalways bringing their mountains
down, their valleys up and makelevel their paths.
But someone told me said youhave to have the ups and downs
to know that God is in control.
Nothing grows on themountaintop if there is a ridge
around the mountaintop where thegreenery stops, and so if we
(15:02):
stay on the mountaintop we stopgrowing.
It's in the valley where thebeautiful things take place, and
where the lush greenery is isbecause that's where we learn
really who God is.
If you read the Psalms, that'sone of the biggest things.
Where I know God is, my friendis.
I'll just go stay in the PsalmsI'll read Because David felt
(15:27):
alone and he just knew that Godwas his help.
David sinned, so everybody whomakes that as a point of God
won't want me needs to go lookat the real people in the Bible.
Ron Meyers (15:42):
God's description of David that he was a man after
his own heart.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (15:47):
Man after God's own heart, and that was
God's description.
Ron Meyers (15:50):
That was God's description.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (15:51):
Yes, and he had failed so many times.
Look at everybody.
There's probably not, but maybeone or two people, three, maybe
characters in the Bible that wedon't see.
That has some source of failure.
Yeah, and so I'm very glad thatGod is authentic in his
writings to us.
Ron Meyers (16:13):
What's some hope for somebody out there that is
looking for a friend for theirsoul?
Kandi Anderson Ferris (16:18):
First of all, don't give up.
There is a God who loves you.
He's not in the Old TestamentGod, he's not a long period ago.
I know, because I talked withhim this morning and I talked
about you this morning with him,that there's somebody listening
that has a broken heart, islonely, doesn't feel life is
(16:43):
worth living anymore and he sayscome to me, all you who are
weary, and I will give you rest.
And he says come, learn from me, take my yoke, my burden is
light and he wants to give youthat kind of life.
All you have to do is justlisten for his voice.
(17:05):
Not look to man, but look up.
Your hope draweth nigh and Ipray that someone across your
path today that will give youthe tools and the joy that comes
from knowing Christ Jesus.
Ron Meyers (17:23):
Well, that was good Candy.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (17:24):
I will say this, though I have hardly
watched the news it's the bestthing I've ever done, absolutely
, that's people are so negativeanymore and it's it's we're
finding fault with everything,when we need to be looking at
the, the Savior, who's comingback.
God wins.
I mean, that's why you wantyour friend.
God wins, and it's not a battlebetween flesh and blood.
(17:50):
This is not what's going on andwe need not be afraid because
people say well, you know,financially we may fail.
Well, scripture says I've neverseen the righteous forsaken or
seed begging bread.
There are.
He said he's never leave us,he'll never forsake us.
This is in God's plan.
We need to stay the course, andhis word says how.
(18:14):
How do we know that we loveJesus, we follow his commands
and we love one another?
Ron Meyers (18:24):
When I return my final thought helping you
overcome loneliness.
Announcer (18:29):
You're listening to get the hell out of your Life
with your host, ron Myers.
Real stories, real strugglesand real hope.
Speaker 5 (18:39):
Spending time with God should be a good thing.
It should be enjoyable, evenexciting.
But some people approach Godwith the wrong attitude.
Sometimes people have atendency to get what's called
paranoid.
Their misconceptions about Godactually keep them from getting
close to God.
They're afraid God won't acceptthem because of their sin.
You just stink to high heaven.
They think they'll be rejectedbecause of their disobedience.
You get some kind of pleasureout of not listening to me.
(19:04):
They think God is so wise andintelligent that he'd just look
down on them.
Kandi Anderson Ferris (19:06):
The guy's a lamb chopped short of a mixed
grill, and wise and intelligentthat he had just looked down on
them.
Speaker 5 (19:09):
The guy's a lamb chopped short of a mixed grill,
and when they dare bring theirrequest to God, he won't be too
enthused.
This ain't no supermarket boy.
If this sounds familiar to you,then you've been listening to
the devil.
He's always trying to convinceyou that God is offended by you,
but when Jesus died on thecross, he gave you access to God
at any time, especially whenyou've sinned.
So get rid of all thosemisconceptions.
God's a lot more friendly thanyou might think.
I'd love to hear about otherpeople's problems and remember
(19:31):
when you blow it the Bible saysGod is slow to anger and
abundant in mercy.
Speaker 6 (19:40):
See, I think that's beautiful.
We would like to express ourgratitude to Coffee News for
their support of this program.
Are you tired of scrollingthrough the same old news feeds
every morning?
Then switch things up withCoffee News.
Our publication is filled withinteresting stories, brain
teasers and uplifting quotesthat are sure to brighten your
day.
And now you can access CoffeeNews anytime, anywhere, by
visiting our website.
So whether you're sipping yourmorning coffee at your favorite
(20:03):
cafe or browsing online fromyour desk, we've got you covered
.
Start your day off right withCoffee News at
readcoffeenewsonlinecom.
Speaker 4 (20:23):
With my heart.
He never fails when I'm at myweakest.
I will trust in Jesus, alwaysin my heart.
He knows the one who goesbefore me.
Ron Meyers (20:38):
Welcome back listeners.
I love that conversation withCandy.
She said a part in there aboutbeing in a crowd.
But yet you that you feel alone.
I went through that.
I could be in these largecrowds and I could be in these
crowds.
I was alone, I was isolated.
I was actually thinking how Iwas going to exit, what I was
(21:05):
doing.
I was getting tired of it, thefun was gone and I knew God was
pulling at my heart.
But I would talk to people hey,hi, ron, how you doing?
Oh, I'm doing fine, how are you?
And in the back of my mind Iwas wondering when is this going
to be over?
I know one day it's going to begone.
I know the festivals are goingto be gone, the carnival rides
(21:26):
are going to be gone.
I know they're going to be gonebecause I'm going to make them
gone, but I don't know when I'mgoing to make them gone, because
I can't make them gone nowbecause I need the money.
So it was that battle.
And it's like you really arelonely because there is nobody
you can talk to, because nobodyunderstands all the hundreds of
different things that you haveto think about, because when you
(21:49):
close one thing.
It affects another thing.
It affects your livelihood,your income, your everything is
changed.
So you have to be on the rightpage.
I had to be, and that's when Ijust started getting closer and
closer and closer to God.
I had to because my lifedepended on it, my family's life
(22:09):
depended on it, my dreams, myhopes.
I was writing it all.
I was placing everything I hadon Jesus.
I said everything I had onJesus.
I said I'm rolling the dice,it's you and me, jesus.
And I did it.
And it was difficult at first,but it was fun, it was peaceful.
(22:29):
It was difficult because Ireally had to deal with not
thinking sometimes that I couldeven have a relationship with
Jesus here, could even have arelationship with Jesus here.
The mud wrestling, bikinipromoter, beer selling guy is
now asking Jesus for help andman, he does it.
(22:50):
He does it to everyone.
There is no one out there inthis world that is so special.
We're all equal.
We're all equal, and God's eyesis this If you have felt lonely
, maybe you are going throughnow, you're missing someone so
much I know I can relate to that.
(23:11):
The only thing, the only thing,and I tried everything, friends,
I mean everything.
You put your imagination to itthing.
You put your imagination to it.
The only thing that was thehealing medicine to my soul was
Jesus, and he loves to do that.
Because when he does what hedoes best, and that is to
minister to us, to us, tominister to us and let us feel
(23:36):
peace, then what happens?
You become a believer.
Feel peace.
Then what happens?
You become a believer.
Your faith begins to grow dayin and day out and soon you
become a promoter.
You're telling the other peoplewhat Jesus did at the worst
times of your life.
So if you're in that littlevalley right now, as Candy said,
(24:00):
that is where you will alwaysfind the friend for your soul.
Announcer (24:06):
You're listening to Get the Hell Out of your Life
with your host, ron Myers.
Real stories, real strugglesand real hope.
Speaker 7 (24:15):
What's your story?
We're looking for stories ofhope and overcoming life's
struggles with God's grace.
Your story validates God's love, mercy, restoration and
forgiveness.
We want to help you share yourstory with the world.
Visit our website,thepromoterorg, and click on the
Share your Story link andsubmit your story.
(24:37):
Your testimony of God's amazinggrace will change a person's
destiny for eternity.
Announcer (24:45):
Getting encouragement is important and it helps us
overcome our fears and gives usthe courage to face life's
challenges.
To receive weekly messages ofencouragement, all you need to
do is text INSPIRE to888-527-1223.
That's 888-527-1223.
That's 888-527-1223.
(25:05):
Our messages are intended toinspire and empower you on your
life journey.
Remember, life is moreenjoyable when you're inspired.
Speaker 6 (25:15):
Ron will be back in a minute to close out today's
show.
We want to remind you today ofthe last words of Jesus it is
finished.
What is finished, the finishedwork of Jesus, refers to the
complete and finalaccomplishment of salvation
through his death andresurrection.
It means that Jesus has doneeverything necessary for our
(25:37):
forgiveness, redemption andreconciliation with God.
Through His sacrifice on thecross, Jesus paid the price for
our sins once and for all,providing total forgiveness and
cleansing.
This finished work of Jesusmeans that we no longer need to
strive or work to earn God'sfavor or forgiveness.
We can rest in the assurancethat our salvation is secure and
(26:01):
that we are fully accepted byGod because of what Jesus has
done for us.
Now back to Ron.
Ron Meyers (26:13):
Well, friends, my time is up and remember today is
a great day.
To make it a great day.
Be determined that you aregoing to have a change in your
life.
You have found a soul for yourfriend.
His name is Jesus.
Have those daily conversations.
Just as Candy said, be open, behonest, be transparent.
(26:36):
God loves a dialogue.
The dialogue is where heministers to us.
So let Jesus minister to youtoday and remember that God has
an incredible plan just for you.
Check out my website,thepromoterorg Until next week.
This is Ron Myers, remindingyou that I love you.
(26:58):
Vaughn Myers, reminding youthat I love you.
Jesus loves you, and when yougive Jesus your heart, he will
become the true friend for yoursoul.
Announcer (27:19):
Get the Hell Out of your Life is underwritten by the
Christmas City Gift Show.
We invite you to come shop withover 255 vendors from all over
the United States from November8th through the 10th inside the
Coast Convention Center locatedon the beach in Biloxi,
Mississippi.
You can find more informationat ChristmasCityGiftShowcom.
Thanks for listening, and ifyou would like to share your
(27:43):
story of what God has done inyour life or listen to previous
episodes, please visit ourwebsite, thepromoterorg.
Join us next week for anotherepisode of Get the Hell Out of
your Life Real stories, realstruggles and real hope.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Las Culturistas with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang
Ding dong! Join your culture consultants, Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang, on an unforgettable journey into the beating heart of CULTURE. Alongside sizzling special guests, they GET INTO the hottest pop-culture moments of the day and the formative cultural experiences that turned them into Culturistas. Produced by the Big Money Players Network and iHeartRadio.