124 - Payton Sellers - Built by the Hard Days - Getting After It

Episode Transcript
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Brett (00:00):
it is here's just legit man I grew it out actually just
for this episode.

Payton (00:05):
I'm just kidding but some vitamins and stuff yeah,
took some.

Brett (00:08):
Uh, what is it?
B12?
I don't know.
What do the girls take?
Collagen?

Payton (00:12):
I think collagen, yeah, I'm taking collagen from my
mustache.

Brett (00:15):
Everyone but dude, welcome to the show dude, thanks
for having me it's uh, it'sbeen way too long we've been
trying to get this done.
For what a month, two months,two months I saw you in the
airport.

Payton (00:25):
Yeah, it was the airport .
That was before that was goinghome for Christmas or coming
back.

Brett (00:29):
Dude, it was going home for Christmas.
Actually, that's a wild time.
So we have you here and you'rethe first guest actually in the
studio Besides Allie.
She's wifey, so it happens.
But man well, thanks for comingon.
I'm pumped to have you.

(00:50):
This is an opportunity.
My friend Peyton Sellers he'son the podcast.
Hey everybody.
We've been friends since highschool really, and since then
it's like I don't know we've allbeen super busy.
It's hard to find time to catchup, so it's kind of nice.
No, it was great yeah.

Payton (01:05):
I remember't know.
We've all been super busy.
It's hard to find time to catchup, so it's kind of nice.
No, it was great.
Yeah, I remember we met what myfreshman year, I think, so,
yeah, 2014.

Brett (01:12):
That's when I was hanging out with Nick and all those
guys a bunch, so that makessense yeah.
That's crazy.

Payton (01:29):
I mean I've got to ask you this because I don't
understand the origin story ofthis your name's payton sellers.

Brett (01:31):
Yes, payton, yes, okay, correct, I always referred to
you as payton, until I heardtheir nicknames pudge where did
that come from?

Payton (01:34):
well, pudge man, pudge man.
Yeah, meister.
Uh, do you want the real storyor do you want the fake story?
That's a little bit cooler afake story.

Brett (01:39):
Um well, how we can do both.
Let's do both.
Let's do both.

Payton (01:42):
So the fake story is and I always got to.
I have to get into it.

Brett (01:48):
Yeah, go for it.
Okay, story time.

Payton (01:52):
So when I was born Okay, and again, this is all a lie,
but when I was born I was 12pounds as a baby, fat as baby
Doctors wrapped me up in tinfoil, called me a chipotle burrito,
so, anyways, none of that istrue.
But you know, people always askhim and so, like I've, like

(02:12):
low-key, kind of built thismassive story out because people
are like, oh, was it like ac-section?
And I'd be like no, no.
And then people like your poormom, I know I know she went
through it.
You know she went to thehospital nine times before I was
born.
I just build on this story moreand more.

Brett (02:29):
That's so good.

Payton (02:31):
And people just eat it up, because the real story is
actually it comes from Clayton.

Brett (02:36):
Okay, our good friend Clayton yeah.

Payton (02:38):
Yeah, and from high school.
So I remember when I was afreshman in high school I was
hanging out with Nick andClayton and we were at someone's
birthday party and I remember Iwas just being super annoying.
I was being super annoying toNick and Clayton, that was kind
of just my shtick, I just lovedjust if.
Clayton was talking, I'd justinterrupt him.
I was such an a-hole so I'djust interrupt him like oh yeah,

(03:00):
yeah, yeah, oh, for sure.

Brett (03:06):
This guy's a loser anyways.
So sometimes people need that,especially clayton clayton.

Payton (03:08):
If you're listening to this, we love you, but you can
need a little pudge interruptionsometimes you just need a
little pudge in your life, yeah,so I remember, yeah, I was
being super annoying and then hewas like he got all flustered
and then but it was kind of likeI was I couldn't tell if he was
seriously mad or whatever, buthe's just like.
I remember he pointed in myface and he was like I'm gonna

(03:29):
come back, I'm gonna think of aname for you.
That is just horrendous yeahhe's like I'll be back in 15
minutes, and sure enough, as hesaid it, 15 minutes on the dot
he comes back, because I wasjust with nate nick and whoever
else.
Yeah and uh, sure enough hecomes back and he goes pudge
he's back because I was justwith nate nick and whoever else,
yeah, and uh, sure enough hecomes back.
And he goes pudge, he's like,because you're so fat I was like

(03:50):
I was.
This was you know I don't know.

Brett (03:53):
Yeah, I want to make something very clear.
You were not fat, I was like ahundred pounds yeah, you're a
little guy, so I just startedlaughing.
But nick hears it and you know,oh yeah, you know game over
yeah, if nick latches ontosomething, everyone latches onto
it.

Payton (04:09):
So he's like yes, you are pudge.
So then clayton then tells kylewho's kyle's my grade and I and
kyle's on the basketball teamwith me at the time.
So clean tells kyle, kyle tellsthe whole basketball team.
So now everyone in basketballis calling me pudge.
And then everyone in yourfriend group starts calling me.
Pudge and yeah, so it just kindof stuck like that.

Brett (04:29):
I mean, I think both are good origin stories the baby
coming out as a Chipotle burritoand then that one Come on, no,
that is funny though, clayton,that guy, when he would like
think about an insult, he reallywas like creative.
He's like the gears in hisbrain would turn and he's like
okay, let me think about thisfor a minute.
How can I make this like themost personal attack to this guy

(04:49):
?
And it doesn't even make sensebecause, like you're not fat or
anything, he's just like Pudge.
It's a bad name.
I'm going for it, although Idon't know.
I think it's like a goodnickname.

Payton (04:57):
I love it, yeah.
So then, like with the fakestories, because the real story,
there's also like morebackground, because they used to
call clayton clud yeah and theyused to call me pud or just
nick.
Only nick would call me pud okayand so like clayton kind of had
you know that muse, he kind ofdrew upon pud and clud, um, so

(05:18):
like there was there's a lot ofinformation that's impressive.
It kind of you know, all cametogether, yeah.
But so, like you know, if I'mintroducing myself because I
mean I'm single, so if I'm goingon a date, uh, or if I'm, I
don't know, at a party orwhatever, and I'm introducing
myself to somebody for the firsttime, first of all, I mean you
know me?
Yeah, I don't really takemyself seriously, so I don't
really want to be like hey, myname's peyton you know that's

(05:39):
weird, I don't know.

Brett (05:41):
I'm with you on that, fit me yeah so I'm like pudge, I'm
pudge it just works.

Payton (05:45):
And then, yeah, people started asking and I was like
well one, the story's too longyeah there's so much information
that like is pertinent.
That's like you know.

Brett (05:53):
And then two girls would start to be like that's mean I
don't want to say that and I'dbe like like no listen, this is
what I call myself, you're beingweird.

Payton (06:02):
yeah, you're being weird like the vibe.
Yeah, like, stop it.
So I know.
So I was just like I'll justcome up with something that is
kind of just irrefutable.
You can't really be like, oh,I'm not going to call you Pudge.

Brett (06:14):
Like.
No, you have to call me Pseriously.

Payton (06:16):
I work in a corporate job.

Brett (06:26):
And it's ridiculous Some of the people there, they just
show up, they're buttoned upevery single day.
You can't make a joke aroundthem, it'll fly over their head
and they're like no, I wasmaking a joke, I was trying to
be funny here.
It's just ridiculous.
My boss is hilarious, he's fromBaltimore, he'll be on a sales
call.
Trying to be funny here and um,like it's just ridiculous.
But then, like I don't know, myboss is hilarious, he's from

(06:46):
baltimore, he'll be on like asales call and drop the f-bomb
on people if they like saysomething stupid.
He's like no, that's effingdumb.
It's like okay, um, I love that,but like I don't, know, why do
you not take yourself soseriously, like I think it's an
important thing for us to do,like life is supposed to be fun?

Payton (07:01):
I agree.
You know I've I've been, uh,this last like month or two.
I've had some interestingexperiences with girls and then,
like I recently started a newjob and so like kind of just a
lot of things coming togetherand I started to kind of realize
I'm like you know what, likewhen something bad happens.
I've kind of always thoughtthis, but it kind of just like
surfaced, yeah, recently it'slike when something bad happens.

(07:23):
I just kind of always thoughtthis, but it kind of just like
surfaced recently, is like whensomething bad happens, I just
kind of I've realized like wait,maybe that's part of the
journey.
You're like maybe, maybe that'swhat will make me you know the
person that I'm going to be oneday.

Brett (07:34):
Yeah.

Payton (07:35):
And uh.
So like I don't know, I, Iespecially found like joy
realize this again like on themission too, you know, like when
you're just like I don't know,you just were outside the door's
getting slammed in your facesometimes because I was in
baltimore on my mission oh, wereyou really?
Yeah, dude so we should talkabout that yeah, that's insane,
it was great, but, um you know,sometimes it'd be raining super

(07:56):
hard and then you knowcompanions noise of crappity
sometimes it was there's justlike so many things going wrong
that it's almost hilarious.

Brett (08:06):
Oh dude, so many times More than I can count,
especially on the mission.

Payton (08:10):
It was amplified.

Brett (08:11):
Yeah, insane.

Payton (08:12):
So yeah, so, like I don't know, that's what I've
kind of been realizing latelytoo.
Another experience, I remember.
I remember I was cramming superhard for like a test one day
and it was like a week, I think.
I put like 20 hours of studyingjust in, like a couple days
before the test.

Brett (08:32):
Jeez dude.

Payton (08:32):
Ended up pulling a 60% on the test.
I was like that's brutal.
And I remember praying, I waslike, hey, that's not really
fair.
Like I did my part.

Brett (08:40):
And.

Payton (08:40):
I asked you know, do a little prayer, and then I just
remember kind of being like dude.
It's one test.

Brett (08:46):
Yeah.

Payton (08:46):
Like who cares?

Brett (08:49):
That's fair.

Payton (08:49):
And so like that, like kind of hit me like a ton of
bricks.
And like that was kind of justlike a cascade, all those things
kind of just came together.
So, yeah, I just feel like youknow, like it's part of the
journey.

Brett (09:00):
Yeah, dude.

Payton (09:06):
You know and so like, and then sometimes what's good
too is I also have a couple offriends that don't really take
themselves seriously.
It's like I kind of just pulloff of their energy love to make
a joke every once in a whileyou have to a well-timed.
You know your mom joke, orthat's what she said like come
on your mom those were all overhigh school.

Brett (09:21):
That was like our entire conversation with people.
It's like whenever we hung out.

Payton (09:25):
It's like your mom jokes all the time 24 7 and you know
like it's pretty funny, you knowso I don't know so yeah, things
like that just kind of allcoming together and it's like
you ever I don't know you everjust be like so focused on
something and then it's justdraining yeah, I just don't have
any other energy for anythingelse, when I'm taking, you know,
like just one aspect of my lifeway too seriously.

Brett (09:48):
Yeah.

Payton (09:49):
And then it just kind of takes over, and then I don't
know, I feel like there's justlike not enough time to just be
as serious as you can.

Brett (09:59):
Yeah, I think like it's important to like it's's, it's
important to take yourself notso seriously, because life is
it's hard as it is and if you'retaking all the fun out of it
yourself, like that's adangerous route to go.
Um, well, you said it made methink of something.
Have you ever heard of thephrase amor fati?
It's a it's a Latin phrase thatmeans love of fate, and like,

(10:22):
the last episode that we justrecorded was actually about this
.
Um, and it came out today,which is weird that you brought
this up.
But the whole idea is like,instead of like it's embraced
the fate that is given to youand so, instead of saying like I
don't know why this happened tome, so you got like a 64 on
your test, you're like, damn,this sucks.
Like I studied for 20 hourswhat's going on, but it's like

(10:43):
the whole entire concept of thatis okay.
Well, this happened to me andI'm going to be better for it in
the future, and a lot of it canbe like a springboard, to be
like you know what?
Maybe I needed to double downand study harder, or maybe I
needed to readjust my studyhabits or whatever.
Maybe it was like a hard weekand I had a lot of like piled on

(11:06):
my plate and I just couldn'treally focus, like whatever it
was.
Yeah, those lessons it'susually like the hardest parts
of your path.
Like it makes the journey, yeah, and it makes you who you are,
like you said.
Like you said and I don't knowthe last podcast I talked about
when I was sick and stuff, and Idon't know if you remember
much- of that.
Yeah, we talked about it at theairport.
Yeah, yeah, but I was like 135pounds, I thought I was dying

(11:27):
and like it's interesting,because that experience made me
want to be like you know what,I'm gonna run and I'm gonna push
my body to like its limitsbecause I know what it's like to
not have that.
Yeah, um same with like thepodcast.
Like during that time Ilistened to podcasts all the
time because I couldn't watch tv, I couldn't look at screens or
anything, and so I was like I'mjust going to turn to podcasts
and so I don't know, it's justlike all these things that I

(11:52):
thought was like a crucible forme and it was like the worst
time of my life.
It turned out to be, like Isaid, like a springboard to go
and do things like this.
So I don't know, know, I meanit's interesting because, like
life sucks sometimes, but it'sall those times where, like you
know, it sucks, but you keepgoing that you learn the most so

(12:12):
I, like you know, I've had a astring of really bad dates
lately, oh no, can you tell ussomething about any of them?
I?

Payton (12:20):
can.
There's one specifically thatI'm thinking of.
That is oh, it'll make yourskin crawl, but let me tell you
the lore, because I can tell thestory worth every second.

Brett (12:30):
All right.

Payton (12:30):
I'm ready.
So and then, yeah, that kind ofgoes into the like don't take
yourself so seriously, because,like, by the end of it I was
just like that was crazy.
I got to tell the boys, youknow.

Brett (12:41):
I'm so excited.

Payton (12:46):
Okay, you know, I'm so excited okay so I probably
shouldn't name drop her, so I'llcome up with a fake name call
her angie let's call her angie.
Yeah, let's call her angie.
It's fair.
Um so, angie, I have knownangie for like three, three and
a half years okay so I went upto idaho three and a half years
ago from one of my homies babyblessings oh nice and uh, yeah,
he was like he was having a baby.

(13:07):
Whatever I go up there, I hadmutual on my phone okay I was
bored, I'm scrolling, I'mswiping, I'm swiping as one does
, you know, right and um.
I end up matching with angieand um, but she lived in idaho
okay, and so anyways uh, I thinkso okay I don't remember.

Brett (13:27):
Actually, I think it was like I lived up there, so that's
why I asked early or something,some tiny town?
Yeah, yeah, there's nowhereyeah there's.

Payton (13:34):
Yeah, the potato farmers are dangerous man whoa very
anyways, angie so angie, yeah,anyways, I matched her, I get
like her phone number, snapchat,whatever it is the whole nine
yards.
And then I go back to Utah andI was like, ah, this is too far.

Brett (13:48):
Yeah.

Payton (13:49):
Like love you, Angie, have a huge crush on her.
Like physically, I'm soattracted to Angie.

Brett (13:53):
Like I think she's beautiful.

Payton (13:55):
Till this day I'm like she is so pretty, but she's kind
of loco crazy in the mind.
Okay, so anyways like, we likekind of stay in contact.
We like text, snapchat,whatever, send memes on
instagram, whatever it is, andbut nothing really happened.
She just lived too far so I waslike whatever.

(14:15):
We ended up hanging out acouple times yeah but then, um,
then she moved to saratoga, likea year ago I think so.

Brett (14:23):
She moved to utah.

Payton (14:24):
Yeah, all right and so, and her family was here, she had
yeah, her mom and dad are here,but she was living with she's
doing like college and alsoliving with her uncle and stuff.
So, um, anyways, she moves hereand I'm like, oh cool, but at
the time I was also in arelationship so I was kind of
like, uh, off limits yeah I'mnot gonna really talk to you
yeah like I met you through adate I'm a good guy yeah, you

(14:46):
know exactly.
So like I'm not gonna be like oh, but we're friends.
Like no, I met you through adating app yeah, like that's
weird, anyways, she was kind oflike why don't we talk?
And I was like uh because I'mloyal.

Brett (14:58):
I don't, I don't know I'm a good, I'm a good guy, I'm a
good, anyway.

Payton (15:01):
so I end up breaking up with or I got broke up with.
That was interesting, that wasa very interesting breakup.
Uh-oh, there's so much tounpack there, but anyways, I'm
single now and this was likeMarch, beginning of March.
So like pretty recent and Iremember hitting her up.
I was like, hey, you're in Utahnow let's go on a date.

(15:22):
I remember hitting her up.
I was like, hey, you're in Utahnow, let's go on a date.
She goes, sure, so I take herout to dinner, we get a sweet
treat and then she does hospicecare or whatever, and so she had
to leave because she had to goclock in or whatever.
So she had to leave at 9.
And it was like 7.30 or 8.
And again I've had a crush, seeif she bites.

(15:44):
So I go like hey, we can go outto my house.
And she's like sure.
And I'm like yes, let's get agun and punch secured.
Finally, and so we go out to myhouse and then again I'm like,
hey, we can watch a movie, throwit out there.
She bites.
She's like, oh yeah, I'm down.
So I'm like, let's go Two fortwo.
I'm two for two.

(16:04):
I'm doing great.

Brett (16:05):
These are layups.
That's pretty good yeah.

Payton (16:08):
So my roommates are downstairs using the couch, so I
was like my room.

Brett (16:12):
Yeah.

Payton (16:13):
Okay, this is where we get the job done.
She's in your room.
Come on now.
You're going three for three.
You should be, I should be, buthold on hold on, hold on.

Brett (16:24):
This is where it gets interesting this is where it
gets interesting.

Payton (16:27):
So we go into my room, whatever, we're watching this
movie at this point the door isclosed.
Okay, in my bed under thecovers watching and I like put
on a random movie.
What did I?

Brett (16:39):
I put on the truman show, probably not a great movie to
make, but like I, just was kindof like that's a good movie.

Payton (16:43):
I just clicked it, yeah so.
So anyways, we um.
Yeah, we're in my bed, so Ilike put my arm around her.
I do the smooth, special movecome on and I'm like, hey, like
scoot over, and she's like she's100 serious.
She's like, oh, I have a weirdthing with physical touch.
I don't want to cuddle and I'mlike we're in my bed and I'm not

(17:08):
going to kiss this girl.
I was like, oh no.
I was like there's no way themost awkward.
I'm literally pencil form.

Brett (17:21):
I'm right here and I'm like Now, you're just enduring
at this point pencil form.

Payton (17:25):
I'm, I'm right here and I'm like now you're just
enduring.
At this point, oh, and at thispoint I'm like nine o'clock
can't come fast enough, you know, so I'm laying there oh man
this and I'm just like, oh yeah,this is great.
So we're still chatting becauseI'm like, well, I gotta try and
make the time pass somehow andso we're talking, she's talking
whatever.
I don't really remember whatwe're talking about, but like,
as we get closer and closer to 9pm, yeah because we're inching
slowly um, she like, then turnson her side and then is now, you

(17:49):
know not just talking to the tv, but rather like to me and
directly, so I'm on my sidecontact and now we're like next
to each other again not stillnot touching, but like we're
close and, uh, I'd like make ajoke and then she like she grabs
, she like laughs and she grabsmy arm and I like I like look
down and I'm like make a joke.
And then she like she grabs, shelike laughs and she grabs my
arm and I like I like look downand I'm like I thought you said

(18:09):
you had a weird thing yeah cooltouch.
And um then she like, shelaughs, he's like did you?

Brett (18:16):
did you tell her that?

Payton (18:17):
oh yeah, I said that yeah I was like I thought you
said it because, like I thoughtI was, like I was saying it like
kind of like a jab, but alsolike I kind of meant it flirty.
So I was kind of like what'sgoing on?
Like you're contradictingyourself, Um, so anyways, yeah,
she grabs my arm and then she'sstill grabbing my arm and she,
and then at this point she'sstaring at me.

Brett (18:35):
Yeah.

Payton (18:36):
Big smile staring at me, completely silent, you know,
batting her eyes.

Brett (18:40):
All the signals are there , all the signals are there.

Payton (18:42):
All the signals, that is green light, go like shoot your
shot.
That's a layup.
So I lean in yeah and sheswerves me.
What crazy time.
So I literally was like wait,what just happened.
And then she, just she was likeshe had a that big old smile
yeah, on her face and I was likeyou're like no, no, no, like
what?

Brett (19:02):
just yeah, I think it's 9 o'clock.

Payton (19:04):
Yeah, get out of my house.
So anyways, I was like that wascrazy, that's wild.
So, yeah, I was like that wascrazy, Okay.
And so then I was kind of like,oh then, no, this happened.
Then I go, that's crazy, Ithrow my hands up and I kind of
just drop my You're like what ishappening?

Brett (19:24):
Yeah, I'm like whoa, whoa , whoa, I'm going through the
most wild array of mixed signalsright now.

Payton (19:28):
I'm getting green light, red light, green light Like
what do I do?
Yeah?

Brett (19:31):
you're playing squid games.

Payton (19:33):
Like this is oh so, yeah , this is difficult, yeah, I was
basically fighting for my life,but anyways, and don't worry,
it gets so much worse.

Brett (19:44):
Oh jeez, much worse.
Oh geez, don't, don't.
What time is this?
Do you think?

Payton (19:47):
this is like 8 45 we're getting close.
Got 15 minutes, I got 15minutes, but basically there's
nothing really that happens inthe last 15 minutes.
But we're holding hands and soI'm just like whatever.
Um, she swerved me, so I'm I'mnot gonna like lean in, but
again.
She's still like your dignityis in this exactly, yeah she's
still like staring at me, like Ican kind of like feel her right
there, and I was like, so I gotto like look at her and then

(20:08):
kind of look away, Cause I waslike I don't know.

Brett (20:11):
Now it sounds like a scary movie.

Payton (20:14):
I got looking away.

Brett (20:15):
She's just staring at you like this all the time no
blinking.

Payton (20:18):
Yeah.

Brett (20:19):
This is terrifying, oh my gosh.

Payton (20:22):
So, anyways, nine o'clock hits, I clock hits.
I'm like, okay, it's nineo'clock, I should probably take
you home.
So I stand up and the way whereeverything was, I stand up and
then she stands up, but she's inmy way like the remote was
behind her on the desk.
And so she's standing up rightthere and she's not moving and
I'm like I gotta get to theremote behind you and again, big
smile staring at me, silent,batting her out you know, doing

(20:45):
all the things kind of like,swerve like, kind of like I
don't know what this is, but,like you know, I'm saying like
getting giddy, exactly, likevery much, showing me that she
wants me to kiss her, and sothen I'm like okay, so I grab
her by the, I grab her by thehips yeah and I pull her in.
At this point we're touchingcompletely.
You know, there's no, I havethis weird thing, physical touch
and I'm leaning in and sheswerves me again Twice, Twice0

(21:08):
for 2.
Now I was 0 for 2.
I thought that these werelayups and these were full
courts.
Wait, what's her deal?
I have no clue To this day.
I still have no idea.

Brett (21:16):
She didn't tell you.

Payton (21:17):
No.

Brett (21:18):
What the heck.

Payton (21:19):
So anyways, I was like okay, I was like all right,
you're like I'm being serious,like we gotta go anyways.

Brett (21:30):
Maybe, like, maybe that's her thing.
She just likes to, like youknow, make guys think that
they're real close to kissingher, and then boom that's like
her favorite thing in the world.
That's why she's laughing.

Payton (21:40):
That's so weird I think she was like genuinely, and
don't worry, this isn't the onlydate we went on, there's more,
okay, there's more, and it getsso much worse and like that's so
like going into this I shouldlike, or looking back on it, I
realize now I'm like, okay, Ithink she's just like a master
manipulator.
Yeah, seems like it.
Just wait, there's so much moreproof to that.

(22:02):
So, anyways, she like then istalking to me and flirting with
me and like any I don't know.
She basically was like we needto hang out again.
She says talking to me andflirting with me and like any I
don't know, she basically waslike we need to hang out again.
She says that to me and I goyeah, no, I agree.
I don't know why I agreed tothat, but I did.
And so I'm also kind of likelook, she's a siren dude, yeah,
she's singing the song, and I'mright over the water I'm like,
oh, you know.

(22:23):
So I'm like, yeah, that's agreat idea.
But then again I get another.
After I drop her off I get moremixed signals, because after I
drop her off then all of asudden she becomes corporate
America's most busy soldier andhas no idea what her work
schedule is and just cannot maketime.
And I'm like you told meCorporate America's most busy

(22:46):
soldier.

Brett (22:46):
That's good.
I'm going to use that now.
It's a good one.

Payton (22:51):
it's a good one, it's a good yeah.
So, anyways, I'm like okay,cool, I'm like text her like
three, four days in a row, like,oh, like are we gonna?
I don't know if it's that much,it might have been that much.
She was kind of leading mealong, just, you know, leading
me to water yeah, I'm a littlehorse.

Brett (23:06):
The other night ago that's kind of fake I was just
testing the waters yeah, and soI'm like what's going on?

Payton (23:12):
so, anyways, then a week later my friend was like hey, I
have free tickets to the jazzgame.
Find a girl, let's go on agroup date yeah and I'm texting
no girls.
So I was like I can text emma,it'd be fun and she's cute.
So I could kind of be like, hey, like I'm on a date with a cute
girl, like clout you know, anduh, so I text her and she's like

(23:32):
, oh, I was gonna go toinstitute tonight, but yeah, I,
I can come to the jazz game.

Brett (23:36):
And I was like that's crazy how you somehow just
instantly found amazing yeah,that's wild I thought you were
corporate america's busiestwarrior or soldier that's what I
thought.

Payton (23:46):
Yeah and anyway, so she just magically clears up her
schedule.
We go on this date.
It was fine, like I pick her up, my friend ended up not being
able to like his date droppedout last second, so it was just
me and her and I was like, ohawkward, but anyways.
So we get to the jazz game.
It's great, it's fun, whatever,um, except there's one part
where I were sitting there andone of my roommate's

(24:08):
ex-girlfriends walks up and shewalks by and she's like Pudge
and I'm like hey, what's up I?
haven't seen her in forever andalso they ended on really bad
One of the worst breakups I'veever witnessed and I was like I
don't really have any beef withyou because I don't know.
I wasn't there.
But, from what he told me likewe don't like you.

(24:29):
Yeah, I'm not supposed to.

Brett (24:30):
Anyways, we're not friends.
Exactly this is bro code.
Yeah, exactly like I'm like oh,get away.

Payton (24:35):
So anyways, she's just kind of chatting to me for a
little bit too long and I'mgetting real uncomfortable and
I'm like okay, yeah, you knowthe answers are getting shorter
and shorter, like totallytotally yes, no, no so anyways,
she leaves.
And then I asked or that's hername, anyways, angie angie,
angie, I can edit it, don'tworry, I'll bleep it.

(24:55):
So angie then is like oh who,who was that?
and I was like, oh, that's myold roommate's ex-girlfriend,
whatever.
And she was like what happenedbetween them?
And I was like, uh, because shehad visited Angie, had visited
me in that three years before wewent on these dates, so she had
met all my roommates.
So in my mind, she's askinglike oh, who is this?

(25:17):
Like what happened?
Because she had met them.
So in my mind it's not reallythat weird.
I have a question, but then shekind of like keeps talking
about my old roommate, Justkeeps talking.
And old roommate just keepstalking and I'm like and she's
like wait, did I meet him?
And I was like I don't know,like the tall blonde one and she
was like okay, what's his name?
So I tell her um his name.
Then she searches up hisinstagram and then she's like I

(25:39):
don't know if I really like thisguy, or I don't know if I
really met this guy, or whatever, and I was like I, I don't know
yeah, there's no way you haveyeah, three years ago or
whatever there's no clue, um,there's no way that I can prove
it.
So and then she's like and thenI was like well, yeah, I, I
think that they broke up.
I was like I love my oldroommate, but he's just kind of
arrogant, like kind of cocky andso, like I don't, he told me

(26:00):
his side of things, but like hewas when I was living with him,
he was kind of hard to live withand he didn't ever really think
that anything was his faultyeah so I was like so I don't
really know if I believe ahundred percent what he said,
but I was like, I don't know, II do wonder, I don't know, if he
like took a lot ofaccountability for anything that
happened there.
And she goes oh, he's arrogantlike cocky and I was like, yeah,

(26:21):
and she's like.
And then she's staring at hisinstagram and she's like I bet I
could fix him and my eyes justgo she said that I was blown
away like it's a cartoon likeyou know, like jaw on the floor,
I could fix him she says thaton a date yes.

Brett (26:40):
What about?

Payton (26:41):
someone else.
Yeah, I'm on a date with youand you're talking about my old
roommate.
The disrespect I was genuinelyshocked.

Brett (26:46):
I was so shocked yeah, what do you do in that situation
?
So I was like.

Payton (26:50):
So I was like what she's like?
Oh, like I could humble him, Icould, like I could fix him and
I was like what does that mean?
you know, like.
So I said I'm like what doesthat mean?
And she's like, oh, like Idon't, like I.
And then she just like kind ofstarts gassing herself up about
how she like can, like, I don'tknow, humble people, what?

(27:12):
What does that mean?
Yeah, what are you?
You were corporate America'sbusiest warrior and now you're
God's most brave warrior.
Like, okay, like nobody'sasking you to humble them.

Brett (27:23):
She just goes up to him and is like you're arrogant, you
suck.

Payton (27:27):
It's like all this stuff just lays, lays into him I'm
like nobody's asking you yeah Idid not ask you to do this, and
she's like I, I could, and allthese things, and I'm like thank
you that's, but then yeah,she's talking about fixing him
and I'm like that's so weird,what so?
Anyways, at this point I juststart to get like a little
discouraged.
I'm kind of like, oh you know,she's talking, she's just
chatting it up yeah about my oldroommate.

(27:50):
I'm on a date with you and youare talking about someone.
I like someone else, especiallysomeone that I know.

Brett (27:55):
That's wild so I'm like I don't know if I would be able
to hold my cool in thatsituation dude I just started it
was.

Payton (28:00):
It was either like go off or just shut down yeah so I
was like well, uh, there's stilllike it was like barely past
halftime.
So I was like we got lots ofthe game left to go.

Brett (28:09):
And I wanted to watch the game.

Payton (28:10):
They were playing, I don't know, the Rockets, I think
.
So I was kind of entertaining,so I was like, yeah, yeah, okay,
sure, totally, so I start toshut down and she can see it,
and she's like, oh, what's wrong?
And I was like I don't know,I'm just like not in a great
mood.
And then she's like well, why?
And I was like like really.
What do you mean, why?
And then she just like keepsasking.

(28:32):
And then I was like well, youasked for it, and so I'm like
well, I don't really like whenyou talk about other guys, when
I'm taking you out on a date,and I was like, imagine how that
makes me feel.
And she was like, oh, that'snot what you meant it doesn't
really matter what you meant.
What you did was this and thisand this, and so I'm like I get
it.
That's probably not what youmeant.
I'm not going to be mad or holdthat against you, but like what

(28:55):
am I supposed to do?

Brett (28:56):
Right.

Payton (28:57):
So, anyways, that was a really awkward situation she
basically pulls it all out of meand I was like okay.

Brett (29:02):
Yeah, so you guys are at a baseball game or not, a
baseball basketball game.
You just laid it all out.
Now it's like what's the mood?

Payton (29:08):
Yeah, Now then she just kind of keeps talking and she
just acts like this is like anormal thing.
It was weird.
We like, we're like I don'tknow it was like Dude, I'm
telling you.

Brett (29:17):
there's potato farmers up in Idaho.
I had a weird experience, tooWeird.

Payton (29:20):
So it gets worse.
Then we're on the drive homeand I get back because she lives
in.

Brett (29:27):
It's got to be the most awkward drive.

Payton (29:28):
I'm sorry it's horrible, but like she just would like
keep talking, so there was nosilence.

Brett (29:32):
Yeah.

Payton (29:33):
But I was just like, yeah, sure.
And then again, like I wassaying before, she would like
kind of flirt, and she knew thatI had a crush on her, like
physically, that I thought she'slike so pretty All these things
, and it was just like dudewhat's?
going on like I don't know likeshe would like say things and I

(29:53):
was like kind of happy and thenI was like wait a second, am I
just gonna forget that?
She, right, just disrespectedme.
Date, first date and then this,anyways.
So, um, she lives in saratogasprings, but like really far
saratoga springs so we I pickedher up at the target parking lot
in american fork oh, okay, yeahis where I picked her up to
take her to the date.
Then we come back and we're justlike in her car, we go get like
a little sweet treat and we'rejust sitting there and it's like

(30:14):
after just chatting and talkingor whatever.
It's like 11, 11, 1 and 30.
Some of that and I was like Ican take you to your car Like we
both.
I'm in the target parking lotnow we go get a little sweet

(30:34):
treat, and so this is after thegame yeah, I'm parking yeah, I
was like she's like oh, let'shang out for another 10 more
minutes, and I was like againokay
I'm like, oh yeah, sure.
And then you, at this pointwe're in the front seat and she
like starts leaning on myshoulder and we're like kind of
doing this weird like cuddlingthing in the front seat.
I don't know, but again, I hada crush on this girl for three

(30:57):
years and I was kind of likemaybe I should just kiss her.
And the two sides of me waslike she disrespected you.
But then I was like maybe justkiss her, yeah why not?

Brett (31:05):
I mean, you've always wanted to.
I mean cross it off a little.

Payton (31:09):
So I was like I don't know, and then she just kept.
She would flirt with me andthen make me I don't know.
So I was kind of like, okay, Ithink I'm going to try and kiss
her.
But then I was like no, I kindof came to my senses.
I was like, no're like flirtingor cuddling in the front seat.
We do that for another likehour.
At this point it's like 1230.
I'm like, okay, I'll walk you.

(31:30):
So again, I tell her again thisis the second time.
I'm like hey, I'll walk you toyour car so.
And she's like okay, no, no, no, no.
At this point, the second timeshe's silent, Says nothing,
Staring into my eyes big smile.
You know all the things yeahand I'm like at this point I
already decided.
I was like no, I'm gonna havesome dignity yeah so I go hey,

(31:51):
I'm, I'm not gonna kiss you, I'mnot gonna try, I'm not gonna
make a move, nothing's gonnahappen.
And she goes wait why?
And I was like you're like.

Brett (32:00):
Well, let's start at the beginning.
Let's start years ago.
No, yeah.

Payton (32:04):
So basically, I was just like I'm so confused yeah, like
there's so much going on andlike I was like, and like this
probably isn't fair.
But also like if I kiss you,I'm the type of guy where, like,
if I kiss you, I'm gonna tryand go for it yeah, why not.
And I was like, but I'm movingto vegas and I really am a
terrible long distance boyfriend, like I hate facetiming every
night.
I don't want to do that youknow.

(32:24):
So I was like that wouldn't befair anyways.
And she's like, oh, that's agood point, did it?
Uh, we have this wholeconversation again, pouring out
our feelings.
Again.
We're too you know we're twoconversations deep of like
serious communication this is mysecond date.
I mean, I've known her for awhile but like this is my legit,
like legit second date withthis girl.

Brett (32:43):
That's crazy crazy.

Payton (32:45):
So anyways, then.
And so then at this point afterthat conversation now it's like
1, 30, maybe like 2 in themorning I didn't end up getting
home till 3 am, dang, keep thatin mind you're almost chatting
the whole time just chattingokay I mean because, like, she
was cool enough to the pointlike where it's like if you make
a joke and you like start likea bit like we would just kind of

(33:05):
bounce off each other.
So it was fun, and that's whereI was kind of forgetting all the
things that she said.
She would say a couple ofthings and I'm like wait, that
was kind of funny actually, andso there were redeeming
qualities of course, but yeah,just that.
Anyways, at this point at 1.30in the morning, then she, it
gets silent or whatever, and I'mjust kind of sitting there, I

(33:32):
look over at her and then sheleans in on me and we get about
this close.
Yeah, we're right next to eachother and I'm like, hey, like
angie, I don't, I don't thinkthis is a good idea, I don't.
Like I already said like that Iwouldn't I don't think this is
a good idea.
And so then she backs off and wekeep she's, but then she like
brings it up.
We're talking about it.
She leans in a second time soyou're the swerver now so now
and then, and then I swerve heragain yeah so now I'm two for

(33:52):
two, you're like a little tasteof your medicine.
Yeah, how's it feel you know,shaking it to the man.
So then, and then we keepchatting again.
Then she leans in a third time.
She has tried three times andI'm like dude, like I said we
shouldn't yeah like I'm, I don'twant to.
But the third time she likelicks my lip, it's two two

(34:15):
thirty in the morning, when,when a girl licks, I'm sorry,
all reason out the window yeah Ihave now abandoned my post at
dignity station and I'm like,hey, it's, you know it's go time
All guns all blazing so it's gotime, and so then I tried to
lean in on her, and then sheswerved me.

Brett (34:35):
What.

Payton (34:36):
The most confusing girl on planet Earth.
Make that make sense.
Make it make sense, thatdoesn't at all.
She leaned on me three times.
Did you say something?
Yeah, the third time, I waslike what is wrong with you?
That's what I said.
I was like what is wrong withyou, really?
And I was because I was like, Iwas, I was mad, but I was also
kind of like, nah, that waslow-key, hilarious, you got me

(34:56):
good yeah that was good, likethat was good.
So I was like anyway.
So yeah, she soars me and I waslike what?
And then anyway she was likepuzzle yeah or no.
Actually, what it was was aftershe leaned in the third time and
licked my lip.
She was like.
Then she told me she's like youare fumbling right now.
She's like if you wouldn't havelike, like you know, swerved me

(35:17):
or whatever, like earlier, wecould be in the back seat right
now.
Again, I'm a guy, yeah, I, youknow.
At two in the morning, all allof my thought goes from this
head to the other head so, likeat this point, I'm not thinking
with my brain, you know, and soI'm like so then I lean in to
kiss her.
And how do you give that speechabout me fumbling?

(35:37):
And yeah, swerve me, that'sinsane, bro.
It had to be at like a controlit must be like a power, yeah it
had to be there's somethingwrong in there, though dude no,
there had like.
Anyways, I lean in.
The first time she swerves meand then I'm like okay, fine,
you lean in on me then yeah,let's see what happens.
And then she did.
And then we ended up kissing.
Bad idea, yeah, bad idea.

(36:00):
After we kissed, she thenghosts me for four days, no
contact, and then she breaks thesilence by like hey, we should,
we should just be friends.
And I was like that's literallywhat I was telling you like
five seconds before we kissed,so like I'm on board with that
yeah so anyways that's insanecrazy, I'll.

(36:21):
I'll make it fast, but there'sanother date because I ended up
asking her to be my date to myfriend's wedding.
I was a freshman, so she endsup coming to the reception.
It was a weird situation, causeI was up in South Weber like
Ogden.
It was like the latent temple,and so I'm already up.
There is where the wedding,like the ceiling and everything
was, and then the reception waslike at six.

(36:41):
Anyways, times got changed onme.
I had to be somewhere forreception photos yeah and I was
like hey, like can you meet melike halfway, like at like 4, 30
or 5 or whatever?
And she was like oh, I'm nothome right now.
No, like I won't be able tomake it at that time, and I was
like okay like that sucks, I'msorry.
She calls me and then she ripsinto me for 20 minutes like hey,

(37:04):
you didn't tell me the time,this is like, this is on you.
Yeah, you didn't communicatewith me and I is like this is on
you.
Yeah, you didn't communicatewith me.
And I was like and I literallyshe like says all this stuff.
I'm like waiting to respond andI go dude, why are you pressing
me right now?
get off my back and she was likeand I've never said that to not
even not, I've never said thisto anybody in my life, but like
she was like going at it.

Brett (37:25):
Why are you attacking me?
I was like back off, dude.
Yeah.

Payton (37:28):
So I say that and I was kind of like, okay, Pudge.

Brett (37:31):
You're like dang didn't know where that came from.

Payton (37:33):
It came out of nowhere.
So I was like dude back off.
Like the time changed on me.
Yeah, and as soon as I saidthat, she was like oh, and I was
like there's my magic trick, so, thank you, get away, you don't
freaking, stop talking to me.
And she's like well, do youhave any friends going there?
And I was like my co-worker andthen my roommate are coming,

(37:54):
like at like seven, and she waslike well, can I go with them?
And I was like I can ask yeah,why not, and I should have just
lied.
I should have been like oh yeah,this girl's like low-key mean
yeah, it's okay to tell a whitelie sometimes, it's okay.
I didn't lie.
I asked my roommate.
I'm like, hey, angie wants toget a ride to the wedding, when
are you leaving?
And he was like, oh, I'll leaveat this time.

(38:15):
And he was like we can take her.
I was like, here she comes.
Hey, yeah, wallet everything.
Hey, hold this, and I'm holdingit.

Brett (38:32):
I'm like Just put it on the table right where you're at.

Payton (38:34):
I'm like I'm not a coat rack, okay, so I put it in my
suit coat and then we're eatingfood or whatever.
And when she finishes her plateshe's like she hands me her
plate and she doesn't ask, shegoes throw it away and I like
grab the plate and I look at herand I go.
I am not your servant.

Brett (38:52):
Yeah.

Payton (38:52):
And she's like can you please throw it away?
I was like why do you want meto throw it away?
I was like you have two legs.

Brett (38:59):
Yeah.
And I was like and the trashcan is right there, and you've
been mean to me all day.

Payton (39:08):
Yeah, you've been mean, mean to me all day.
They chewed me out like an hourago, so the trash can's right
there, and so, anyways, then shewas like no, please throw it
away for me and I was like it'sgotta be a power trip, dude,
okay okay, so then I throw itaway for her.
And again, I was just doinganything to kind of like
preserve the piece because likeshe was just acting weird.

Brett (39:21):
Anyways, music starts playing and I mean, you know me,
I, there's time to dance.
Yeah, the dance floor.
Oh yeah, I'm a girl, I have to,you have my job.

Payton (39:30):
I'm legally obligated absolutely so I sprint to the
dance floor.
I'm having so much fun one ofmy and then one of the
groomsmen's.
Like bro, like when a slow songcomes on.
Well, like they aren't had theyall had their girlfriends and
wives or whatever.
He's like go get your date andwe'll all like slow and I was
like hold up right there,buckaroo.
She friend zoned me like twodays ago and I'm super confused.

(39:53):
Here's all the reasons why I'mconfused.
And he's like yeah, maybe not.
He's like yeah, good point.
He's like yeah, and so I'm likeyeah, yeah.
Dang dude so anyways, the slowsong comes on, and instead of
doing that, I just go out of thecircle.
angie never ended up dancing,never came to the dance floor,
neither did my roommate andco-worker, and so she just kind

(40:13):
of was just latched on to themyeah so like those three were
just just just sitting, justhanging out being boring just
yeah, and I was kind of likewhatever, anyways, you also
friends on me, I've in my mind.
I again I'm learning this now,but apparently, anyways, I
always thought, if youfriendzone me, I'm not gonna
make a move right that's whatfriendzone means.

Brett (40:32):
I'm pretty sure that's what it is.

Payton (40:33):
Yeah, that's universal so if you want me to be friends
with you, I'm going to honorwhat you want exactly, I'm not
gonna make a move that'srespectful apparently that was
wrong.

Brett (40:45):
Oh no dude, so anyways going it going.

Payton (40:47):
This is the very end, but anyways, we send them off.
We're standing in the cold,it's like low key.
We're outside, it's kind ofraining a little bit, but I was
also sweaty as nuts.

Brett (40:57):
Oh yeah, when you go to dance parties, it's the worst
it's a furnace.

Payton (41:03):
Dude, my suit coat is gross, like all wet, was like.
So I was kind of like, oh,maybe I should offer my jacket
to angie, but also like dude,this is disgusting.
Yeah, I don't think she wantsthis.
So I was kind of like and Imean, I was sitting there and I
was getting cold, so I actuallytook it off, or I didn't take it
off, but I was like, dude, Ishould because this is freezing.
Anyways, we get in the car andI'm taking her home at this
point and I'm like, how like?
How was it?
Like I had a lot of fun did you, you have fun.

(41:24):
And she was like, yeah, it wasgood.
And then silent for a secondand I'm like you know, silence
before the storm.

Brett (41:30):
Yeah, here we go.

Payton (41:31):
And she's like so why didn't you dance with me?
And I was like, here we go,Jumping right into it, huh.

Brett (41:41):
We're just jumping right into the storm, so why didn't
you dance with?

Payton (41:43):
me why didn't you offer me your coat?
And I was like, why didn't you?
In my mind, I'm like in my mindI was.
I didn't say this because I waslike I had already said some
pretty like sharp things I meanI've said, I've told you.
So I was kind of like dude,like big battles, don't just be,
you know mean yeah but I wassitting there and I was like
dude, this girl's so entitled,like she is so entitled throw

(42:05):
him a plate, yeah, yeah, and soI was like I didn't think that
she wanted to she said youdidn't ask and I'll go.
I apologize, but you, you friendzoned me.
I didn't think that.
You know, friends, slow dancetogether, right?
That's not what.
I'm not going to grab you bythe waist, hold your hand and
then, you know, sway you back atthat, that's not what friends
do yeah at least I don't thinkthat and she's like, well, no,

(42:29):
we were on a date and I was like, yeah, but we're friends, right
, like that takes priority rightrespect like I should friends.

Brett (42:37):
You put me there.

Payton (42:38):
I should respect the friends, though, right and she's
like well, you didn't even ask,you know.
She's like I have this, youknow standard and I.
And she's like I'm disappointedand I was like, and I was like
you're not my parents.
I don't know why you'redisappointed.

Brett (42:51):
I'm disappointed in your puds.
She didn't dance with me, youass.

Payton (42:54):
Crazy, that's nuts dude.
It's an hour drive from wherewe were back to just to the
Target parking lot, bro.
She chewed me out for an hourand, like I was saying before,
the whole time mad at you theentire time, the whole time.
Oh my my roommate and myco-worker pull up.
Next was while we're drivingand they're like, hey, and I'm

(43:15):
sitting there and I'm like justthrow him the middle finger
going down with the boat guys.
We're dying, you know anyway.
So she chews me out the wholedrive.
You know just.
I, you know I expected more of.
She chews me out the wholedrive, oh jeez, you know just.
I expected more of you, allthese other things, and I just a
couple times I was like back upwe are not dating.
We are not dating.

(43:36):
Wait a second, we're justfriends.
Yeah, you friends owed me forcrying out loud Like you can't
be serious.
Oh my gosh, dude, that's insane,it was a never-ending, just
hour-long, like I have thesestandards da-da-da, and I was
kind of like who are you talkingFirst of all?
Who do you think you are?
Did we start dating four daysago, Dude?

(43:58):
It was unbearable.
So that is the three-part story.

Brett (44:02):
That might be one of the most painful date stories I've
ever heard.

Payton (44:06):
Dude, it is so bad.
That sounds one of the mostpainful date stories I've ever
heard dude, it is so bad andthere were a lot of details like
, for example yeah, I'll saythis on that drive.
I'm like, look, I get it, youhave your standards okay.

Brett (44:16):
Yeah, I'll I'll respect that.

Payton (44:17):
I'll respect that you don't have to change your
standards.
I was like but you know whatyou should do.
I was like you know, becauseshe would always say she's like
oh, I know you so well, I go, ifyou know me so well, you should
have known that saying whatyou're saying, the way that
you're saying it, was going tohurt my feelings.
I was like I'm just not.
I was like it's pretty easy totell that I don't really love

(44:40):
confrontation.

Brett (44:40):
Right.

Payton (44:41):
And I was like I think most people don't.
Yeah, I don't think that mostpeople do so.
I'm like, I understand that youhave your standards.
I was like but there is aneasier way to communicate it.
So then I was like let mesummarize Keep your standards.
Just say it in a way that I canreceive it well.
Yeah, help me understand it andI quote, I quote she says no,

(45:05):
just what Period?
No period, that was it.
And I was like wow, and I gothere's no compromise here.

Brett (45:13):
And she says no, and I was like I'm not going to tell
you what I'm thinking.

Payton (45:18):
I was like there's no way, yeah.

Brett (45:20):
And then she relates it Cause she was like, if I, she's
like if too much or whatevershe's like, then I'll end up
because then she, she like toomuch.
You're just asking her to talk,you're just like communicate a
little bit better with me.
If we're friends, we're friendsif we want.

Payton (45:33):
If you want to date me, let's date like but that's the
thing is nobody knows what wewere.
Yeah, not even socrates couldfigure it out.
You know, dude?

Brett (45:42):
nobody doesn't seem like it.
What was going?

Payton (45:45):
it doesn't seem like it so then, yeah, then she was like
then she brought up some likeabusive ex-boyfriend she's like.
I compromised with him and then, you know, he ended up like
hitting me and I was like, firstof all, we're not dating yeah
we're not gonna, we're not,that's not an analogy that works
that we don't do that you know.

Brett (46:00):
It's not an analogy that works wait, nope, nope.

Payton (46:03):
X there um wrong answer.
We're not dating.
Second.
Second of all, I am I don'tknow, I think, I think this.
I'm one of the least menacinghuman beings on planet earth.

Brett (46:14):
You've always been a very nice guy.

Payton (46:16):
I work, I really try to be as friendly as I can, so I am
not that guy.

Brett (46:21):
So first of all, we're not dating.

Payton (46:22):
Second of all, I'm not that guy and, third of all, I'm
not asking you to change yourstandards.
Right, I said that.
I was like I'm not asking youto change your standards, keep
them.
Yeah, just how you communicatethem.
Can we, can we agree onsomething, dude?
And she was like no.
And I was like all right, andagain I just started laughing.
I just started laughing.
You're like this is a great bit.

Brett (46:42):
You got going on.

Payton (46:42):
I was like the boys are going to love this.
Yeah, you're actually hilarious.

Brett (46:46):
Let's keep you around.

Payton (46:49):
No, that's crazy dude Insane, that is nuts.

Brett (46:52):
I mean, we've been talking about this this is kind
of the theme right now is likeyou learn from those experiences
.
They teach you a lot.
It's like in the future I'msure you'll be a great
communicator, because you'llknow exactly what not to do.
Yeah.

Payton (47:09):
So like like hey, more power to angie.
But that's insane, dude, insane.
She was all I remember we had aconversation too and I was like
dude, you know what I reallydon't like, and this is personal
preference so yeah, to eachtheir own.
I was like, but if I complimenta girl I say, hey, you look
really pretty, whatever.
Um, I think again my opinion.
I think the only right answeris thank you, yeah, thank you so
much.
That was very nice.
That's what I think is.
The only acceptable answer isthank you, yeah, thank you so
much.
That was very nice.
That's what I think is the onlyacceptable answer.
I was like I really don't likeit when people just go.

(47:31):
I know, you know, does thathappen.
I said it has happened to me andI'm like dang, oh, my gosh,
dude Like yeah.
Anyways, and she starteddefending that, I was like I'm
sitting there and again I'm justflabbergasted.
There's no way.
This girl's real Dude.
That's insane.
She has to be doing a bit.

(47:51):
No, I feel like the right thingto do is like oh, that was so
nice.
Thank you, I thought that thatwas common sense.
Right, and she started defending.
She's like no, if a guy saysthat I'm cute, I already know
that I don't need him.
I'm like that's not what I'msaying.

Brett (48:07):
I don't know.

Payton (48:07):
I tell my wife she's hot every day, yeah, and she's like
thanks, and it's just thank you, yeah, because it's just simply
a nice thing to say, that's allit is Nice thing to say.
Dude yeah, so that again, justall these, the way that she just

(48:28):
would like say words but thenkind of flirt a little bit but
then like be serious, but thenlike I don't know other times
because I remember I was likewhy are you so mad right now is
when we were driving home yeahlike what did I do to deserve
this react, this reaction?
and she was like I'm not madright now.
And I was like you're not madright now.
Yeah, I don't want to see youwhen you're.

Brett (48:48):
If this is you not mad, I do not want to see what mad is
because I can't imagine whatthat's going to be like it's
gonna be three hours of ofyelling at you dude.

Payton (48:56):
Yeah, one hour wasn't enough, yeah that's crazy man
insane so what a story, longstory.

Brett (49:01):
It's a good story, I mean builds on itself.
Yeah, that's, we need all thedetails for stuff like that.
That's why we have a podcastdude Exactly, talk about stuff.
But that's wild.
I mean, this is something I wasgoing to ask you about anyways,
baltimore Did you meet anyoneas crazy as Angie in Baltimore?
Because I've heard some storiesabout, like?
I mean, I've heard about theMidnight Boys.

Payton (49:23):
Yes, midnight Boys, midnight Boys, they're sick.

Brett (49:26):
I thought they were fake.

Payton (49:27):
They're real dude.

Brett (49:29):
Did you ever see them?
For the people who don't knowwhat the Midnight Boys are, what
are they?

Payton (49:33):
It's a gang that at noon and at midnight they'll drive
on like pit bikes or-.
Quads and stuff right Quadsmotorcycles, whatever it is,
through the streets of Baltimoreand they pop wheelies that are
so high that they're straight,vertical, that they're.
They're the quads, and you knowhow does it work?

(49:53):
They're straight vertical.
So they're the 12 the we are,as the midnight boys are 12
o'clock boys something like thatsomething like that, yeah, and
so that's, and they just wouldhave.
Like they were leaning so farback, like every single time
they were always just had theirhands down touching the ground.

Brett (50:07):
That's insane.
How did they not fall?
That's crazy.

Payton (50:10):
I think they do fall a lot, because I remember seeing
people fall when they'd popwheelies.

Brett (50:15):
No way, I would just laugh.

Payton (50:16):
I'm like that's hilarious.

Brett (50:17):
Do they get up yeah?
They get up and they're justlike Get some road rash, it
doesn't matter.

Payton (50:24):
It was bad dude.

Brett (50:25):
What was it like Because we both serve missions for our
church.
What was it like serving outthere?
Were you in the city.

Payton (50:31):
Yeah, yeah.
So I started in Pennsylvaniaand then I did a couple of
cities around, but yeah, I wasin Baltimore right as COVID hit.

Brett (50:40):
Dang.
Okay, it was wild.
Whole city shut down then.

Payton (50:43):
It was weird Because, like yeah, I was walking around
outside before COVID.
Things were normal.
I remember someone mentionedCOVID and, like I don't know, I
wasn't really keeping up withthe news at the time.
And so I was kind of like Idon't know what that is, but he
was like, oh man can't shakeyour hands, and I was like this
bump.
He said nope, and I was likeelbow, Like let's go.

(51:07):
All as you think it is, it is,it is Absolutely yeah.
Like I'm like there and I'vegot a story of I got a gun
pulled on me.

Brett (51:16):
Did you really?
Yeah, dude, let's hear it.
Bring the sucker up just alittle closer to you, okay, is
that?
Okay, you can move it, got it?
Nope, I want to hear thegunshot.
Or gun pulling.

Payton (51:30):
Yeah, there was a guy that we were teaching.
He was a member but he lived inthe city and the ward that we
were going to was a little bitjust the place that I was
assigned to was a little bitoutside the city and so I
remember I have to listen for aminute, Let me think he wasn't a
member, but we contacted himbecause we were.
We were told by our missionpresident, like hey, start,

(51:52):
there's already a spanish likecongregation in the city yeah
let's try and see if we canstart one that's like outside of
the city oh, so you still lookspanish.

Brett (52:00):
I didn't know that.
Okay, cool it's cool, it's goodum now say this whole story in
spanish, please you got me there, dude, it's been four years I
did not have that same skill,but, um, I'm trying to think.

Payton (52:14):
Okay, so this guy lived in the city, but he was a part
of the english ward that wasjust outside of the city and I
was like oh, if he, like hisname was jesus.
You know, caesar very hispanicname, Very um, he's from Mexico,
Super great guy before hepulled the gun at me.
Even then, if you pull it, it'san, you'll understand Nice he's

(52:37):
.
He generally was a nice guy, Um, but anyways he had a little
spark in him, you know there wassomething there.
Yeah that.
So anyways, we.
I remember we were like we'llgo visit him, so we go talk to
him, and he was just like ohyeah, like I loved helping with
the missionaries when I was in.
Mexico, he's like.
I was even doing it when I wasin DC for a little bit, he's

(52:58):
like, and then I moved here inBaltimore, he's like, and I kind
of just fell off and I was like, well, do you like cool?

Brett (53:05):
That's perfect.

Payton (53:06):
That's great.
So we've got a DecemberChristmas thing, like first week
of December the ward is puttingon a little show like a little
talent show, and he's like, oh,I've got a little daughter and
he's like, and my girlfriend,she's not a member, so we could
bring her to church and I'm sureshe'd love to hear about Jesus
and I go, that's great.

(53:26):
So, anyways, then the day ofthe event or whatever happens,
we're not supposed to give rides.
We had a car but we're notsupposed to, or no, actually we
didn't have a car.
Then we were on bus and bike,yeah.
So he was like, hey, can I likelegit?
Like 10 minutes before itstarted and it was easily like a

(53:47):
20 minute drive.
Um, he was like, hey, can I geta ride?
And to the event, and I waslike we're already here, we've
already like been helping set up.
I was like I let me call somepeople yeah, so I call up like
the, you know just a bunch ofpeople in the ward and
everything, and lo and behold,nobody could give him a ride,
dang.
So yeah, I feel so bad for himlike dude I'm.

Brett (54:08):
I'm really sorry so he's not showing up this thing.
So, yeah, he's not showing upthis thing.

Payton (54:10):
But he like starts to get like really sad.
He's like no, like elders likemy, you know, my daughter is
really looking forward to thisand I was like I know, but like
do you have like a bus pass?
like I, I, I don't know, like II can't give you my bus pass
because mine's attached to myname, so like they won't let you
on.
Yeah, um, I, I, there's nothingI can do, and uh, so there were

(54:33):
.
Yeah, there really wasn'tanything that we could do and he
was just like he was.
I could tell he was like supersad, he like called us.
He's like there's nobody and Iwas like I've called like eight
people yeah like and the otherthey're either like already here
setting up or I don't know.
Nobody was just like reallywilling again, it was like so,
so last minute that it was kindof like also you're like.

(54:54):
You had a certain amount ofmiles exactly, yeah, so I
couldn't just you have to likecalculate how far you're gonna
go each day.

Brett (54:59):
Yeah, it was wild.

Payton (55:01):
So I was like, uh, we used we.
And then, yeah, we used bus.
So I was like, can you get abus?
Like I was like I don't know,so there was nothing we could do
, and so then he just kind ofwent zero, dark 30.
Didn't hear from him and I waslike crap, dude.

Brett (55:17):
How long, how long did you not hear from him?

Payton (55:19):
A couple weeks.

Brett (55:20):
Okay.

Payton (55:22):
So that was beginning of December, and then I remember
because he was the type of guythat you text him, he texts back
right away yeah even if he wasat work, and so I was kind of
like something's up.
I mean, we know, we know what'sup.
I knew exactly what was wrong.
I'm not gonna say that.
But yeah, I was like dang dude,I need to like, you need to
like, bring him a treat orsomething.
So a couple weeks go by and thiswas the week of christmas okay,
I was like, hey, let's go seehim, like let's go bring him
some treats or whateverchristmas, like it's not gonna

(55:44):
make up for it, but hey, maybewe can put a smile on his face
yeah, maybe we can do something.
Something's better than nothing.
So I go and we get to his house, we knock on his door, no
answer.
Knock on his door, no answer.
And I was like, if we knock athird time, is that like really
annoying?
Yeah, it is, but we did.
And then he finally answeredand I was like, oh, like hey,

(56:05):
cecil, like what's up?
And so we're talking with himand he's like hey, come on, come
on inside.
He's like actually, can youguys help me clean up a little
bit?
I was like, yeah, totally.
So we like helped clean up hishouse.
Because, like his dog, had likejust peed on the ground.
So I'm mopping up some pee onthe ground and I was with an
elder who was from Peru.

(56:26):
I was with an elder who wasfrom Peru, okay, so he spoke
just perfect Spanish.

Brett (56:29):
Yeah.

Payton (56:29):
And I'm sitting there and I'm like I don't know.

Brett (56:32):
I'll get a couple words.

Payton (56:33):
Yeah, I'll get a little bit, pero you say dog pee, pero
and he was in the English word,so he would like kind of do the
speak some English.
Throw a Spanish word in there.
And that's just kind of how hetalked.

Brett (56:45):
Yeah.

Payton (56:49):
And that's just kind of how he talked, yeah, and so I
got most of it.
But anyways, he was talking andthen he's like hey, elders,
like try this.
He like made a little treat andI was like oh, thank you so
much, like hey, man, like howyou been, and he was just like
he sat down on his couch andhe's like not good, and I was
like I'm so sorry, like I know,I know about like the december
thing.
He's like yeah, he's like no,that was tough.
He's like well, he's like I'vebeen jobless for a little bit
and I was like oh, really yeahhe's like yeah, I've just been
doing like construction jobsjust on the side, like, but

(57:11):
nothing like set.
And he's like and he's like mygirlfriend's pregnant right now.
He's like, and she's like,yelling at me to, you know, try
and get this job.
She's like I have, you know,all this pressure.
He's like if I don't get a job,he's like I'm gonna get kicked
out of my, of my house I waslike oh my gosh.
Yeah, he's like, and he's likeit's really unfortunate.
He's like because I was runningin the cartels in Mexico, no

(57:32):
way.
When I met the missionaries andthey got me out of the cartels,
he's like but I still know allthose people and he's like, and
he's like there are people onthis street that I could go and
I could get drug money right nowhe's like I could go get drug
money right now and he's likeand I need money.
He's like but I know that that'swrong, and so he's like but I

(57:53):
need money.
So bad right now, dude.

Brett (57:56):
And he's like what do you do in that situation, Bro?
I was like You're like 19 yearsold.

Payton (58:00):
You're like okay, let me give you some life advice.
He's talking about narcos andI'm just sitting there like I I
don't know, I don't know, likeI'm here, you know, my parents
paid for my mission.
I'm like I don't know how to doanything with money.
So, yeah, exactly just thatwhere I'm like, oh, shoot yeah
what do I?
How am I supposed to sit hereand be like?

(58:20):
You need to pray harder I'm notgonna be that guy.
I'm sorry, you know, this guy'sgoing through some seriously
dark times right.
And then he's talking's talking.
He's like.
He's like, you know, he's likeshe's pregnant and she wants to
abort it, but I want to keep it,yeah.
And he's like so we're fightingwith that Dang man, he's like.
And then he's like I have mydaughter who lives, would it be?

(58:44):
What did he say?
He starts to get seriouslyemotional as he's telling us the
things just slowly and slowlygetting more and more emotional,
and I was like I'm sinking intomy chair yeah, oh gosh, he's
like washing things.
He's like washing dishes and hestarts to get.
And then he starts to get likereally worked up yeah as he's
like like angry now.

Brett (59:01):
Yeah, he's getting angry.

Payton (59:02):
and then he has, he has a knife, he's, he's cleaning a
knife in his hand and it's likea pretty pointy one.
That was pretty scary.
It's kind of a big knife andhe's facing away from me and
I've got the mop.
What am I going to do to defendagainst a knife?
I've got?
No defense, you've got the peemop bro.
So I'm like sitting there andthen he turns around and he goes
.
And when you elders, he's likewhen I couldn't depend on you

(59:24):
guys, what did he say?
He's like I couldn't depend onyou guys, he goes.
And my little girl criedbecause she couldn't go to the.
You know the church talent sohe goes, he points the knife at
me, he goes.

Brett (59:34):
That pissed me off and I go my you're like oh, this guy
just told me he's, he's been inthe cartels and now he's yelling
at me with a knife.

Payton (59:44):
Yep, he was telling us about his tattoos earlier and he
had like people that died onhis arms.
And then he throws the knife inthe sink, just throws it and he
goes.
That just pissed me off, andturns around and throws it and I
was like oh dear, and so I lookat my companion.
What was nice was the guy fromHopefully it's a quick one, Just
kidding.
Hopefully he ends it and hegoes.

(01:00:04):
I've just been struggling withdepression and anxiety.
I'm looking at my companion heknows like it's called capoira,
capoira, I don't know, but it'slike peruvian leg wrestling.
Okay, and I don't know it'sreally good, like if someone
like tries to like you know,jump on you.
He knew exactly how to likedefend it.
So I was looking at, I was likeget ready, get your legs ready.

(01:00:24):
I was like please tell me, tellme.
And he's sweeping up somethingover in the other room and he's
just like but then, oh no,that's not what happened.

Brett (01:00:34):
I lied.

Payton (01:00:35):
He says that you pissed me off, but at that time, about
two minutes earlier, mycompanion asked to go to the
bathroom.
So it's just me and this guy.
It's one-on-one.

Brett (01:00:43):
I'm dying in this situation I have no survival
skills, this guy who has legwrestling skills.

Payton (01:00:48):
I'm like I need the leg wrestling, you know, yeah, and
he's in the bathroom so it'sjust me and him and we're
chatting.
And then I'm like, oh, I'm, I'mso sorry, like what do I say?
And then he's like I've beengoing through so much depression
, so much anxiety, all the otherthings.
He goes, he gets up and there'sa gun on top of because, like
he's got a sink and then he'sgot some cabinets above.

(01:01:08):
He gets up and he grabs a gunand it's loaded.
And he showed me.
Really so I know it was loaded,yep, it was very loaded.
And he was like you see, thatwindow that's open right there.
And I was like, yeah, and he'slike I was this close from
pitching myself head first outof that window yesterday and I
was like I'm, I didn't know whatto say.

(01:01:31):
I was like yeah I'm I'm sosorry.
Well, I'm like I'm glad thatyou're still here yeah like I'm
glad that you didn't do that,like I was like, and so I'm
trying to like, like hey, mandon't get on the ledge, you know
yeah I'm like we need you here,like we, you know, we love you,
you know all these things.
I'm like, I'm trying to say I'mtrying to say what I can, and
then he goes, he goes, he's like, and so then he starts crying
and he's got the gun and he goesand then he points it at me,

(01:01:54):
and so this guy is not in a goodmental health state and he's
pointing a gun at me that'sterrifying horrifying like he's
still in the bathroom and soit's I'm soloing this and he's
like.
He's like when you made mydaughter cry, I wanted to end it
all.

(01:02:14):
I was like oh my gosh and he's,and then he's pointing it at me
and he's super mad and he's justcrying, and then he just, and
then he just kind of drops itand he starts just sobbing yeah
and I was like reach for the gunyeah, and he goes.
He's like I just need.
He's like I need.
He's like I'm happy.
But then he like looks at me.
He's like I'm happy that youguys are here.

(01:02:35):
He's like.
He's like I just need a hugright now, man.
And so I'm like I got you okay,so I start hugging him and he's
got the gun and he and we'rehugging you know he's hugging
over the shoulder and I was likeplease don't shoot me, yeah,
please, please don't go off LikeI'm really hoping that this is
like a connection moment, notlike a you know, I betrayed you,
so I'm hugging him.
He's like I just need a hug man, so I hug this guy and.

Brett (01:03:02):
I calm him down three minutes I don't move, insane and
finally, as we're hugging, mycompanion finally comes back out
and so finally I've got back uphey, I don't know what you can
do against a gun but hey, I feelsafer you might be able to make
some cool break dance movesexactly.
That's crazy dude.

Payton (01:03:20):
Yeah, then we ended up.
I was like okay, dude, likewhat do we need to do?
Like let's figure this out, andhe's like I need to get this
gun away from me, and I was likeyeah, probably yeah.
So he goes in the other room andI look at my man, I'm like we
need to leave, like right now.
And then, as soon as I like, assoon as I say that, he comes
right back and I was like, hey,hey, we're done finishing
cleaning.
Yeah, it's all clean, buddy.
And then he was.

(01:03:40):
When then we ended up chattingwith him, he's like no, guys,
please don't leave yet.
And I was like, oh, okay, okay,yeah.
So they ended up staying foranother 30 minutes or whatever
hour and basically talked himoff the ledge and was like, hey,
how about we talk about somegood experiences with God and
good experiences that you hadwhen you got baptized and how
you felt?
and all that jazz and so, yeah,by the end it was like, okay,

(01:04:06):
okay.

Brett (01:04:08):
I don't know how you kept your cool man Dude I was.
That's like a miracle in itself.

Payton (01:04:13):
It was insane.
I was tweaking, I was sittingthere.
On the inside I was like I'mgoing to die, I'm literally
going to die, and on the outsideI was like we love you.

Brett (01:04:21):
We love you, man.
I was like, how did I pull thatoff?
I don't know.

Payton (01:04:28):
I mean like it had to be God.
It had to be God.

Brett (01:04:30):
Like I look back on.

Payton (01:04:31):
it was my fault, at least he thought it was my fault
that he didn't get to go.

Brett (01:04:36):
I made his cartel.

Payton (01:04:38):
This guy had killed.
Yeah, he had killed and all ofthe things had.
It was a drug runner, all thesethings for years.
And oh yeah, and he's like yeah, there's the Sinaloa mafia.
It's a guy I have a cousinthat's in that, in that cartel.

Brett (01:04:52):
No way.

Payton (01:04:53):
In Baltimore.
He's like I know where he lives, all the other things.
He's like you want to seesomething crazy?
He showed me a picture.
I was like what is this?
It's like oh yeah, he was goingdown the street with 45 grand
in drug money $45,000 in his inhis glove box.
Cops pulled him over.
And this is a I was like Ididn't say that and he's like,

(01:05:13):
look, and it was yeah $45,000taken.
I was like that's nuts.
And he's like and you also lookunder there.
He's like look on this nextpicture, or whatever he's like,
that's a picture of the drugsthat they took as well.

Brett (01:05:26):
Holy crap, dude.
I was like oh my god, that isterrifying.

Payton (01:05:29):
Insane dude.

Brett (01:05:30):
There really is something to Like God protecting you,
though, in those situations,because I had some weird run-ins
on my mission.
Oh yeah, I had a guy that was.
He started selling meth when hewas 17.
And he got caught when he was19.
So he was doing it for like twoyears but he ran a huge meth
lab him and his buddies, oh mygosh.

(01:05:52):
And so he gets arrested andwhen he gets out of prison he
became a member of the churchand stuff.
But in prison he's like youhave to survive in a gang in
prison.
And I walk into this guy'shouse when he's telling us this
story.
We're sitting on the couch.
He has pirate-themed everything, so pirate blankets, pirate

(01:06:12):
decorations.
He has pirate tattoos all overhim oh my gosh.
And he's just tatted up like tothe max and um, he's telling me
like, yeah, like sometimes, likeyou know, the pedophiles would
get killed in prison with, uhlike the top of cans, you know,
like you open up a can, theyfold them, make a knife with
them and sharpen it and then inthe showers, slip people's
throats.
So he told me.

(01:06:33):
And then, like he's telling meall these things, I'm like he
had like crack people's throats.
So he told me.
And then, like he's telling meall these things, I'm like he
had like cracked people's skullsin in prison to like tell
people he's not to be messedwith.
And he was a skinhead, so hewas like a neo-nazi, oh my gosh.
And um, me and my companiondude he was actually from
mountain view um, he dated megolson oh yeah but dan gl is his

(01:06:54):
name.
Okay, so Dan and I are sittingthere and Dan and I just like I
don't know.
We always like to have fun withour people we were talking to
and stuff.
And so we're like you know, outof those tattoos, like how did
you get them in prison?
And stuff.
And he's telling us like theywould break pens, they'd have
needles and stuff and like putit in a straw tube and then like
literally like tap it on you abunch of times.

(01:07:15):
It's like prison tats, yeah,and that's crazy.
Dan goes do you have any thatyou regret?
No hesitation, this guy gets upoff the couch, rips off his
shirt which is he rips off hiswife beater, his gross tank top,
and he points to his back.
Dude, a swastika the size oflike a dinner plate is on his

(01:07:37):
back.
Oh my gosh.
He's like definitely this one.
And we're like whoa, like allright, oh my gosh.
And we're like what the heck dowe do?
That's crazy.
He was a super nice guy, likehe loved us, but like had some
weird run-ins and then like Idon't know One, and they're like

(01:07:58):
I don't know we um one timewe're in a trailer park and we
were walking to this one houseand I'm not even kidding, this
is like a horror movie, dude.
No lights are on on the outside, but there's one lamp on the
inside.
The curtains are drawn and youcan see like a silhouette, like
looking out outside, and we'relike what?
That's really creepy.
And then we like start walkinginto this house.
It was like I don't know, maybeit was like seven o'clock in
minnesota winter time.
it gets dark close or real earlythere, and so we're walking up

(01:08:21):
this house and this guy's likeum, he's like starts shifting
inside and he like runs to thedoor and we're like this is
weird, like we gotta startturning around, and so we like
just walk away, we're like we'renot going up to that door
because, like we know he'sbehind that door.
Yeah.
So he's either like waiting tolike open it real quick, or

(01:08:42):
something like that, or he'slike locking it up and like
hopefully, he's locking it up,hopefully.
And so we get back in the carand, as we're driving away, he
like runs out of his lawn andwe're like that could have been
really weird, but like justweird stuff like that weird
stuff, yeah, but I don't know.

Payton (01:08:56):
I mean, you just can't explain.

Brett (01:08:57):
Yeah, like, yeah, like if I would have stayed I could
have died, yeah and you just getweird feelings like oh yeah,
for me it's like that was forsure, god being like get out of
there yeah like walk out ofthere and it's, it's, it's cool,
because I don't know yeah if,uh, you felt that like after the
mission, but on the missionit's like amplified, oh for sure
it's pretty cool.

Payton (01:09:15):
Yeah, I remember there was one time we were walking
down the streets of baltimore.
This was on halloween.
Bad idea do not be in this, inthe heart of baltimore on
halloween that sounds asmissionaries as missionaries.
Yeah, oh, it was a bad idea.
There's a group of like 15 16year old kids.
Uh, there's probably like fouror five of them yeah and they're
all wearing like theJabberwocky masks.

Brett (01:09:35):
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, the dance ones With all the slits
right here and right here yeahcreepy, kind of terrifying Purge
ones almost.

Payton (01:09:41):
Basically yeah.
And, in sync, we're standingacross the street from them.
We were trying to deliver aBible to somebody and, literally
all at the same time, I turnaround, I'm like looking at them
and I'm like, oh, is that like?
Is it like a?
Dance group or something All atthe same time.
They just all stare and look atme and I go I dropped the Bible

(01:10:03):
.
I'm like we need to get out ofhere now.

Brett (01:10:04):
You guys need this book.
That's so creepy.

Payton (01:10:08):
So then we got out of there and I was like, yeah, we
need to not go back to thathouse, not if the sun is down.
That's terrifying.
No man, it was scary.
I was like I don't know whatthey're gonna do.
And then when you're inbaltimore too, yeah, sirens 24 7
oh, I believe it for seven.
That's insane choppers therewere a couple times.
We'd be walking along.
It'd be a helicopter and alight would shine on us and I'd

(01:10:30):
be like, hey man, we didn't donothing yeah, preaching the word
yeah, I saw people.
I saw cops pull over like a bus,get everyone out of the bus and
like they arrested likeprobably four or five people.
They were just laying on theground.

Brett (01:10:43):
We're on our way Like they were on the bus.
What the heck dude they pulleda bus over.

Payton (01:10:48):
I was like I didn't even like.
Now I think about it, likeobviously you can do that before
that's insane, insane dude.

Brett (01:10:58):
It was just like stuff like that, where you're just
like huh, you're like what, if Iwas here a couple minutes
earlier, what would happen?
But exactly it is wild man,like and to like, bring it all
together.
It's like all these things.
They teach us stuff and asweird as it is like you know,
seeing a skinhead show me aswastika tattoo and stuff, it's
like you know, it's uh, put somehair on your chest I don't know

(01:11:19):
, taught me like how to grow upa little bit like going through
that stuff.
And yeah, definitely the missionlike oh, yeah, I mean, you knew
me in high school, I was a wildkid.
And now it's like, yeah, Ithink I've had a grown up like
grow up a lot, um can't be youknow.

Payton (01:11:33):
Sure, grow up a lot, um can't be you know, sure Burning
down trailers anymore but, youknow, I mean, yeah, I think it
goes to show like you could bein you know dangerous situations
or whatever.
And then it's just like yeah, Iyou know, I thank God for his
hand you know, in helping me saywhat was you know needed to be

(01:11:53):
said.
You know, keep my cool, allthese things because, yeah,
there's there's so many othersituations as well where it's
like I don't know.
One big thing that I've beenthinking about a lot is I'm like
dude, because I've tried, youknow, to do what god tells me.
I'm not nobody's perfect.
I'm not perfect.
I'm not listening 100 of thetime.
Yeah, but because, like we tryto do that, there's so much like

(01:12:13):
regret that I have seen thatI've saved myself from like I
have an uncle who he also wentto jail and he was like telling
me like stories like that, likethis was probably a couple
months ago, um, but yeah, he wastelling stories.
No, not a couple months ago, itwas legit like thanksgiving, so
it was yeah, like over half ayear ago.

(01:12:33):
But yeah, he was like tellingus stories like that and he's
like, oh, dude, he's like Istarted with, you know, this
drug.
Yeah, and then it led to thisdrug he's like, and then I was
with friends who were dealingdrugs, so then they got me more
drugs.
He's like so then he got lockedup because of you know are
using drugs.

Brett (01:12:48):
I've always been like ah, I should probably leave.

Payton (01:13:02):
Hey man, if you want to do that, do your thing.
That's not me.
I'm not going to be holier thanthou but, I'm just going to
remove myself because I knowthat I just don't feel
comfortable here, and it's beenso helpful because it even leads
into other things, like whichfriends you should, you know,
prioritize.

Brett (01:13:19):
Oh, for sure, dude yeah.

Payton (01:13:20):
So it's like there's the super serious stuff where it's
like holy crap, you know, theseguys are doing something that I
just really do not agree withversus like I don't know.

Brett (01:13:29):
Yeah.
Helps you be with spot right orright time, right place for you
know maybe even if you meetyour wife or whatever.

Payton (01:13:39):
It is, things like that.
So I don't know, trusting god,is it's really cool to see, like
, sometimes you can't see itbecause there's a lack of bad
things.
That's what I, that's what I'vebeen noticing.
I'm like, okay, I just I'm.
I've been saved from all thesesituations where I don't know,
whereas, like, I don't evenrealize.
I'm like, oh, I'm actually I'mnot, you know cracked out on the

(01:14:01):
streets of you know some cityseriously where I could be vegas
and vegas.

Brett (01:14:06):
I could be right, but, like you know, because I'm doing
xyz and I'm just trying, I'mnot yeah, and I think that's
that's the whole point is likejust try and do your best, like
that's literally all God askedof us is try and do your best
and help someone else, like bethere for other people.
But I really think, like whatyou said with trusting God and

(01:14:29):
like trusting his timing andstuff, like things will work out
for you.
I know you're going throughlike a lot of stuff like that
right now, like personal stuff,like we're um.
I know I are going through likea lot of stuff like that right
now, like personal stuff, um,like we're trying to have kids.

Payton (01:14:39):
Yeah.

Brett (01:14:40):
I don't have sperm, surprise, Um.
But like stuff like that, likewe're trying to like work
through it and we have faith.
It's like you know what It'llwork in God's timing.
Um, so it's like, again, justtry and be the best you can try
and help others along the way.
And yeah, like you said, um,those people who have gone

(01:15:02):
through those experiences thatlike teach you what you don't
want in life, can be some of thebest teachers ever.
Like I have a very close familymember who has taken like a
drastic turn in their life andlike they lost one of their kids
, they like, yeah, they that kidwas adopted, so still alive,
but like she lost her rights andstuff to it.

(01:15:23):
Um, all because of herdecisions.
Like all because of her choices.
And it didn't start, like youknow, hard drugs.
It was like one choice at atime and yeah, um, just a
slippery slope it really is andit's like I don't know.
I tell people the same thinghappens with discipline.
Like you do one disciplinething and it'll start the whole
chain reaction oh yeah um, samekind of principle.

(01:15:45):
So it's like you choose whichpath you want to go down.
Yeah, one's obviously easierthan the other, but the easier
path leads to a harder life?
Oh, yeah, for sure.

Payton (01:15:52):
It's like I remember I saw spencer um walker.
He posted on his story andthere's something that I I've
always thought oh, yeah, forsure.
I remember I saw Spencer Walker.
He posted on his story and thisis something that I've always
thought of.
It's like choose your heart.
It's like waking up at thistime.
Every single day is hard.
Working out every single day ishard.
Getting after it is hard.

Brett (01:16:10):
It's tough, but so is being lazy, because you get to a
point where you know you, youdon't like anything you let it
get far enough, you get obeseand then you're gonna have a ton
of health issues, like yourjoints are gonna hurt, you're
gonna get diabetes, heartdisease pick your heart man,
yeah, pick your life like that,yeah, you pick your heart.

Payton (01:16:31):
If you can just, like right now, do something that you
know maybe puts you out of yourcomfort zone, it doesn't even
have to be something crazy.
I'm reading Atomic Habits rightnow and it's like, dude, 1%
changes go such a long way.
Like you're saying, onedisciplined action it can lead
to two, and then you get to apoint where it's no longer like
a conscious oh, I am thinkingabout doing this, this, this and

(01:16:54):
that it just becomes nature.

Brett (01:16:56):
Yeah, it's like a habit, yeah, atomic Habits.
I love that book.
There's a I think there's astory in there where there's
some guy who wants to get inshape and he's like I'm just
going to go to the gym and Ithink he goes to the parking lot
and then drives home, yeah, andthen he goes in the next day

(01:17:16):
like showed up, and then crazy,like it's cool, and it does like
spiral into that kind of stuffand yeah, man, I mean I think
it's it's a lifelong practicebut, like you know, a lot comes
from it.
It's very fulfilling.

Payton (01:17:28):
So for sure, and like I'm sure, it's the same thing
with running with you I'm sureit was like.
I mean, now you're running, youknow marathons and going, going
crazy, but I'm sure when youstarted I don't know, because
I've been trying to run it, it'slike I could do like two, three
miles right now, so I wouldassume it was probably that way
with you.
But, yeah, you start there andthen now I mean, look at you now

(01:17:48):
, yeah, and in fact you're at apoint where it's not this, I
assume that it's not thisgrueling discipline where it's
like, oh my gosh, like I have to, you know, go run this,
whatever I mean.
It seems again as an outsiderperspective, like it seems like
you enjoy it and like it'ssomething that brings so many
health benefits.
It's so disciplined, like allthese things.
I'm like I see you and I'm like, dude, that's what a good

(01:18:09):
example, you know, cause I'mlike I need to run, know I need
I need to treat my body with youknow, respect and care and and
love um, but it's hard, you knowand then definitely pick your
heart, yeah, you know so.

Brett (01:18:21):
Yeah, I mean like running's a good example because
like, yeah, I am running likemarathons now, like ultra
marathons um, it's fun, likeit's.
It's definitely hard, um, butwhen I started, I was doing like
11 minute per or yeah, 11minute miles, so I was pretty
slow.
Yeah, and then doing like 11minute per or yeah, 11 minute
miles, so I was pretty slow, andthen doing like two miles every
now and then I think, when Ihit like seven miles one time,

(01:18:45):
that was like my biggestdistance I've ever done and I
was like I'm so pumped.

Payton (01:18:49):
But it felt crazy.

Brett (01:18:51):
And then, yeah, now, like four and a half years later,
I've gotten to the point ofqualifying for Boston.
But it's just a discipline.
It's a daily discipline and,yeah, not every day I want to
wake up and go run.
Actually, most days I wouldrather stay in bed.
I don't want to get up and godo this.
I don't want to go run 10 milesright now, but I know what

(01:19:15):
comes on the other side.
And it's like I'm proud ofmyself for it.
I know the benefits that aregoing to come mentally to me, to
my body and stuff too, myhealth.
But yeah, it's all aboutchoosing your heart.
Figure out which one you want.

Payton (01:19:29):
Yeah, I love that.
I think about that a lot whereI'm just like, yeah, dude,
sometimes it's hard to be know,be dedicated to god yeah, yeah,
sometimes it's hard to be, getit be dedicated to running.
And yeah, when I say sometimes,generally most of the time,
most of the times it is Iwouldn't say yeah, that it's
like something so easy, but likeit just.

(01:19:49):
That's just your life now yeahyou don't really question it.
Yeah, it sucks.
I mean, I mean, and I'm sure itwouldn't take a lot for you to
just sit in bed, but it's like,hey, there's 10 miles that have
to be ran today they just haveto be ran and there's.
There's no getting around it.

Brett (01:20:04):
So do you know what david goggins is?
Every time I'm thinking in bed,like I'm laying in bed, I'm
like maybe today I'll, I'll skipit.
There's this video.
I always freaking play in myhead where David Goggins goes so
you're going to be a bitchtoday.
And I'm like, oh, dang it, I'vegot to get up.
You're like no, I'm like no,it's the worst.
But yeah, dude, I think it'simportant.

(01:20:25):
I know we've been going for anhour and 20 minutes, so quite
some time.
Yeah, we're just chatting, justJust chatting, but I think it's
a good place to wrap upAnything like that.
Last thing, I'll ask you Ifthere was someone who was
looking to start their career,because I know you've studied a

(01:20:46):
lot in college and you justgraduated and now you're going
into dentistry or dental schoolthat's what it's called.
Right, that takes a lot ofgrind, that's a ton of work.
A lot of studying Also takes alot of grind that's a ton of
work, a lot of studying.
Yeah, um also takes a lot ofcommitment yeah like for people
out there who want to startsomething, like maybe they want

(01:21:07):
to take a chance on themselves,maybe they want to become a
nurse, or like they just want totake a chance and do something
new yeah, like what would yousay to that person to, like, you
know, let them know that it'slike okay to be a beginner, to
start getting after in their ownway.

Payton (01:21:21):
That's a good question.
Um, that's definitely somethingthat I battled with, because at
BYU it was so interestinglycompetitive.
You know, I'd be like dang, I'dbe talking to some kids that I
don't know.
Maybe it was pretty early on inthe semester and I'd be like,
dang man, that test or thatassignment was kind of tough and
there'd be a couple people thatwere like that was tough for

(01:21:42):
you.
And I was like yeah, jackass,it was hard, you jerk.

Brett (01:21:47):
Leave me alone.
I don't want to talk to youanymore.

Payton (01:21:57):
So, yeah, I definitely struggled with being like hey,
you know, oh, like this is hardfor me or it maybe doesn't come
super easily for me at first Um,I don't know, I I found, uh,
yeah, it is okay to be abeginner.

Brett (01:22:11):
Yeah.

Payton (01:22:12):
Everyone was a beginner and you know, and I thought
about that a lot Um, I rememberas well there was a, a talk that
I read um, because when I wasin chemistry, when I was in the
second, my second chemistryclass, so chem two, I remember I
was sitting there.
I was like dude I don't know ifI'm cut out for this like like
there are teachers going oversome, I don't know reaction.

(01:22:33):
I'm sitting there I'm like thatdoes not make any sense.
And I was like and I'm, youknow, in in chem two, I'm, I'm
barely a sophomore and I, Ican't get this.
Yeah, I was like dude, I don'teven know what you know dental
school is going to be like.
Well, come to find out.
Good news with dental school islike they want you to pass so
badly yeah because I mean, ifyou think about it, it's like

(01:22:55):
hey, we come to our dentalschool, only 10 of our students
actually pass well, that's greatso like there is in terms of
med school, dental school, likethere are so many once you get
there, like there are so manyresources, like they want you to
succeed.
Um, but what I would say is, youknow, and I'm sure you've had
this as well, I'm sure itprobably relates like the

(01:23:15):
runner's high.
Maybe you know when you're like, if you have to run up a hill
and you're like, wow, this sucksso bad, I kind of like it.
That's kind of hilarious.
Like we were saying about themission before, like this is so
terrible, that's kind of funny.
That's how I would kind ofthink about a lot of things in
terms of studying or whatever.
I'm like dude, I have thiswhole mountain of things to get

(01:23:37):
through, especially, yeah, inChem 2, even Chem 1, I'd be
sitting there and I was likethis is supposed to be a review
and it's not.
I'm like what is this stuff?
When I'm starting out, I justremember being like you know
what.
I'm just going to accept theidea that this is going to be a
grind and, as soon as I canaccept that it's going to take
effort, that it's going to behard, it's going to, it's

(01:24:02):
probably going to be long, I'mprobably not going to be super
you know happy.
Anytime that I start to havedoubts, I can remember oh yeah,
I knew that it was going to belike this and so you know, when
I would get there, I'd be likedang, I knew that it was going
to be like this.
But, like you were sayingbefore, I want to take a chance
on myself.
I want to be the one thatcontrols my future.

(01:24:28):
I can't exactly control the testgrade that I get, but I can
control how much I study for itand if I at the very least feel
comfortable about maybe goingthrough past assignments or
whatever, as soon as I feelcomfortable about the review
materials going into the test,okay.

Brett (01:24:40):
Good to go.

Payton (01:24:40):
I'm good, I have grinded , I did what I needed to and I
can feel comfortable.
And even even when you know,when I got that 60% of the test,
I was so mad I was like dude,what the heck.
But then I kind of was like butI did prove to myself that I
can do that.

Brett (01:24:54):
Yeah.

Payton (01:24:55):
But I was like you know what I need to do.
I need to not put myself in asituation where I have to do
that.

Brett (01:25:00):
Right.

Payton (01:25:00):
So that was what I learned from that, because it
was either cram for 20 hours orfail it more.

Brett (01:25:06):
I love that.
That's such a good mindset.

Payton (01:25:08):
So yeah, just accept that.
It's a grind Right, accept it,and it doesn't have to be easy.

Brett (01:25:14):
Yeah, sometimes it's hard .
If it's something worthwhile,it's not going to be easy.
Exactly.

Payton (01:25:19):
And I was like I want to be this, I want to be that guy,
yeah, and this is what it takes.

Brett (01:25:24):
Okay, I love it Okay.

Payton (01:25:27):
You win, I'm not going to fight it.
You win, I will follow thegrind.

Brett (01:25:30):
Yeah.

Payton (01:25:31):
The grind is going to tell me what to do and I'm just
gonna you know, follow just seewhere it takes you yeah, and
it's been.
It's been good because I, youknow, I'm not sitting here like
man.
Why did this teacher, you know,expect this of me?
I'm like sometimes I mean, I, Istill feel that way, I'm a
human, but like I'm not.
It doesn't take a lot of spacein my head yeah, you're not
making excuses, exactly.

Brett (01:25:51):
It's just.

Payton (01:25:52):
This is what it is, you know the grind is there, so just
yeah accept it, go with thatflow yeah, get it done yeah, get
it after, get after it, yeah Ilove it, dude.

Brett (01:26:03):
That's such a good mindset like, especially with
the beginner piece, like yes,it's okay to be a beginner, and
I think, like you said, like tryand make fun of yourself a
little bit.
Like go listen to my firstepisodes of this thing, it's the
worst thing you'll ever hear.

Payton (01:26:16):
It's so bad.

Brett (01:26:18):
It sounds like I'm talking like this.
It's so bad and I have no ideawhat I'm talking about, but like
I've been doing this for almostthree years and it's like I
knew it was going to be harddoing it and just committed to
it.
Yeah, like we'll see where itgoes.
Yeah, dude.

Payton (01:26:34):
I love it.

Brett (01:26:34):
What a good way to close out.

Payton (01:26:36):
Perfect, perfect ending.

Brett (01:26:38):
You're the man, dude.
I appreciate the hell out ofyou for coming out here, Dude I
appreciate you.

Payton (01:26:41):
You're a role model for me.
I don't know what you'retalking about.

Brett (01:26:43):
This is freaking fun, no, dude, I mean, that's the thing
it's like everyone has thingsthat we can learn from.
I did Dude.
You're the man.
I appreciate you coming on.
Of course, everyone else.
Thanks for listening.
Rate the show if you liked itat all and, as always, keep
getting after it.

(01:27:04):
Dude, you're the man.
That was freaking good.

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124 - Payton Sellers - Built by the Hard Days

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}124 - Payton Sellers - Built by the Hard Days