Sometimes the most turbulent waters reveal the pearls of our deepest transformations. In a heartfelt exchange on our latest podcast, Zach Lloyd, a beacon of hope whose story punctuates my book "The Gratitude Challenge," opens up about his life's rough patches that ultimately sculpted the man he is today. Together, we navigate the emotions of the past—bullying, heartbreak, substance abuse—and how these shared experiences, raw and unfiltered, have shaped our dedication to fitness, faith, and helping others find their way through the dark.
As you listen, you'll be moved by Zach's harrowing journey from the brink of despair to the strength he found in the most unexpected of places. His encounter with near-death experiences and drug dealing, followed by a pivotal life-saving call, exemplifies the incredible impact of human connection and the undying hope that lives within us all. It's not just our struggles that define us, but also our capacity to rise, to rehabilitate, and to discover new directions. We're here to show you that no matter how deep the valley, the climb to the summit is within reach.
This episode isn't just about overcoming—it's about the transformative power of giving. I share how serving those in need, those who the Bible refers to as 'the least of these,' has not only alleviated my own battles with depression but has filled my life with a joy that transcends the ordinary. We invite you to find solace and inspiration in our narratives, and we challenge you to embrace the cycle of compassion and thankfulness. Your story, like ours, holds the potential to uplift and guide others towards a life where gratitude isn't just a practice, but a lifeline.
Connect with Zach:
Zach's website here
Get a free resource: End Calorie Counting Toolkit here
Follow Zach on IG: @zachlloydcoaching
Connect with Stephanie:
Get a free resource The 4G Method Journal here.
Shop Stephanie's books here.
Follow me on IG: @Giving_Gal or FB/GivingGal
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey friends, it's Stephanie here with Giving your
Best Life Podcast, and my friend.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Zach Lloyd sustainable anti-diet coach.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Wonderful, and today we're going to talk about being
uncomfortable because Zach isgoing to be very uncomfortable
with the topic that we'retalking today, but sometimes in
life we have to do things thatwe're uncomfortable with.
So Zach has been a guest on thepodcast.
I just see now you're like theco-host every other episode
because he is coming on here andjust as like a reminder of why.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Zach's here.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
I would love for you to share why you think you're
here, but for me it's like thisis our health and wellness.
What we eat what we put intoour body, like taking care of
ourselves it is a big part ofgiving your best life, because
if you don't have your health,you don't have anything,
anything else to share.
Yeah, I mean, that sums it up100, perfect.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Yeah, we're on the same page.
How do you give your best lifeif you're not healthy or on a on
a sustainable path to get gethealthy?
Great um.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
so, anyways, I want to back up a little bit and talk
about um, like how I really gotto know zach on a different
level and he has an amazingstory that I would love for him
to share with my audience.
But um and we've been friendsfor a while.
We actually talked today it wasseven years since we met.
Because he didn't get to theday on april 1st, uh, because I
(01:21):
had done an interview on apodcast that he was working on,
the Giving Challenge, and so onmy next book, the Gratitude
Challenge, I had been workingout with Zach.
He was my coach and as I'mwriting this book, I was
collecting stories from otherpeople.
So most of the stories in thebook are mine, but a few are not
, and so I just see now, zach,use gratitude around the gym and
(01:46):
even online.
You seem very happy, verygrateful.
Do you want to talk a littlebit about that, like what I saw
from the outside, not knowingyour story?
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Yeah, well, what did you see from the outside?
Speaker 1 (01:59):
This like you're always very happy, you like?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
yeah, I mean, I truly am passionate about working out
, lifting weights, however youwant to put it, not just weights
, just getting active like justbeing active, like living in
indiana is very hard for mesometimes because I like to be
in the mountains so much andbeing active in the mountains
and any different season doesn'tmatter that just truly fuels me
.
But the passion to just bemoving is is huge in my life,
(02:25):
right?
Speaker 1 (02:25):
so I think that's kind of weird, yeah, and like we
would work out at six in themorning and I would just show up
and I don't know.
I just was like, wow, this guy,he's got it.
So can you write somethingabout gratitude and how you're?
You just seem happy and so he,he says yes to writing, but when
(02:45):
he sends it to me it is hisstory.
That I had no idea.
Yeah, like I remember one I wasso grateful that you felt like
you could trust me with yourstory.
Um, but then I was like what doI do with this?
And we even talked like it madeit into the book, so the
gratitude challenge, zach'sstory's in there.
(03:07):
But even up till I think I wasgetting ready to print, you
weren't for sure if you wantedme to print it yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
So I said I remember that.
I remember the very moment Isat down to write it and I was
like, oh great, this is going tobe tough.
Like what do I even write aboutrelated to gratitude and and
just you know, staring at thecomputer for a while then
something started coming out andthen it was one of those few
times in my life where I feellike it was just a download from
God.
It was the Holy Spirit justtold me what to write and it
(03:36):
wasn't really me writing it.
And then, after I had writtenit, I looked down like this is
pretty personable, personal,vulnerable, um, and out of my
comfort zone.
But I've again.
I had no idea what I was goingto write that day.
It just happened, and so Iturned it into you and said this
(03:58):
is what I got.
What do you want to?
Speaker 1 (03:59):
do with it.
Yeah, I remember we meeting andlike talking over.
I think I probably cried alittle bit because I I just
didn't know, and I think it's agood um like topic of you never
know what people's lives are.
You never know what they'regoing through.
Like I was viewing Zach throughour 6am sessions.
He's got energy, he alwaysseems happy, he seems grateful.
(04:22):
That was the surface.
That's what I asked him towrite about.
And then I read your story andI'm like, wow, we never know
what people have gone through,their struggles, how they got to
where they are.
So, um, that to touch on that.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
how you perceive me is very fascinating to me, so
cause it's weird if I say it,but the fact that you just said
it I can hit on it.
So you said you perceive me asenergetic, uh, like upbeat, what
was that?
Yeah, like happy, happy, yeah,okay.
So I get that a lot right, andespecially on like a lot of the
videos I do.
I get that a lot because myvideos are like that, they're
high energy.
(04:55):
I'm not like that all day,thank goodness.
My wife is very thankful forthat.
But, um, part part of that isbecause I have been so hopeless
and miserable in my past that Ireally value.
And this is not like aday-to-day thing where I think
about all the time like or elseI wouldn't be human Right, but
(05:15):
like, if I really step back andthink about why I do what I do,
it's because of that, because Iknow how dark this world can get
and bring you down and get tothe point of like pure
hopelessness, and so that's onereason why I really am so
passionate about what I do isbecause whoever is on the other
end of the video or theconversation that I'm having,
(05:35):
like I believe in you so muchbecause I am not special by any
means at all in the slightestbit, if anything, I'm below
average.
I really feel that and if I canget out of that dark hole than
anybody can and again, it wasn'tme doing it like working out
was part of it, yada, yada, yada, but ultimately it was by god's
(05:57):
grace alone, right and all ofus have that, so that's kind of
why I do it yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
So we've been dancing around like the dark hole, but
you do have a story that, Ithink, does give other people
hope, because they do look atyou.
Whether you like it or not,they look at you, know, like
(06:23):
look at it, I mean you have itor not.
They look at you and they'relike look at Zach, I mean you
have an amazing life, abeautiful wife, like the best
wife.
I love your wife.
You have beautiful kids, andpeople can look at your life and
go, oh, zach has a perfect life.
And actually, though, like yousaid, god saved you.
I feel like his hand came down,saved your life, and I want
people to hear that.
(06:43):
So, if you're listening to us,rip, or you see us on social
media and you're like look atyou, two perfect people, it's
like, no, look what God has done.
So do you want to?
Yeah, for sure?
Speaker 2 (06:53):
So, yeah, I'll kind of just long story short.
And then you asked you say if Iskip over it, okay, um, during
middle school and high school Iwas bullied a lot and that
really played a part into myhigh school experience as it got
progressively worse and the waythat I kind of looked at myself
and like a best friend at thetime supposedly best friend just
(07:15):
kind of like ended up sidingwith the bullies again long
story short and then liketreating me in such a terrible
way and then aligned with themand I thought he was my best
friend so there's like betrayalis all that typical high school
stuff.
It feels like relatively typicalthe way that.
I handled it though, was nottalking to anybody, not reaching
out to anybody, not asking forhelp, not telling anybody how I
(07:37):
feel that was the last thing Iwould do is tell them the
outfield.
It was like, you know, kind ofthink until you make it
situation, and then I kind of Istart experimenting with kind of
like drugs till you make itsituation, and then, um, I kind
of I start, um, experimentingwith kind of like drugs and
alcohol a little bit, and then Istart to find this group of
people that are a lot like me,where they're kind of like on
the outskirts of the normal,like high school kids, and what
(07:59):
I mean by that is like reallylike they just marched to their
own beat and they did not carewhat other people thought of
them, and somehow, one way oranother, I started becoming
friends with one of them, andthen it became a group, and then
, all of a sudden, it's likethis is awesome, because, like I
can say screw you to everybodythat didn't like me or bullied
me.
And then I have a like-mindedindividuals that feel the same
way about pretty much everything, and that's where we could just
(08:21):
kind of cause destruction inour own ways, and whatever that
turned into, and then, slowlybut surely, over the next couple
years, as I graduated highschool, after, you know, trying
different drugs here or there,um, I became, uh, hooked on
oxycontin and I had a lot offriends, same thing.
And one day is before I wassaved, um, I was driving my car
(08:44):
and I just I knew that if I keptgoing down that road, it's just
one of those weird momentswhere I was having such a bad
morning because I was sohungover from oxycontin the
night before, and and I just Iknew that I had to make a change
.
And it's funny because, likegod saved me, I was having such
a bad morning because I was sohungover from Oxycontin the
night before and the nightbefore, and I just I knew that I
had to make a change.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
And it's funny because, like God saved me
through an Eminem song which islike you know, like that's how
God works, I think that's a booktitle, yeah right.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
And so it's not afraid.
And in the rap, like Eminemtalks about not being afraid and
to like stand up to your demons, whether they're like in front
of you or the inner demons.
And ultimately that moment Iwasn't saved.
But looking back, that was aspiritual moment for me because
I never went back to Oxycontinafter that day and talked to
(09:30):
anybody that's been hooked onany type of drug like that, like
you don't just give it up inone day.
And yeah, there was like theside effects and stuff like that
.
But I got through that and ahuge part of that was also
working out, and working outended up becoming that new drug
for me in a healthier way.
But I had to deal with thatdown the road later.
That's another story.
(09:50):
But long story short.
A little before that in highschool, my girlfriend at the
time breaks up with me and itwasn't sadness about her
breaking up with me, it wasbecause I was a terrible
boyfriend, I was just a.
I mean, how could I be a goodboyfriend in any way, shape or
form?
It was more about control, allabout control, and I had been
(10:15):
messing around with her for solong and she finally had enough,
like about time.
And when she finally had enough, I realized I had no more
control in my life.
Like that was the last thing Ifelt like I had control over was
her, and like a messed up way,obviously right.
And so I was like what, what amI doing with my life?
(10:35):
Like, what do I?
Got going for me, you know, Iwas supposed to go to university
of oregon and be a duck and,like, have a college experience
and I've always been super, youknow, book smart or whatever,
get good grades, yada, yada.
Like that was not the path thatwas turning out for me.
And I found myself in my car atthe time and I had a Glock 45,
(10:56):
which I was using to sell drugswith but only part of the story,
fun fact and I was not like oneof those people who was looking
for a reason to use it, but Ihad it because I was willing to
use it and ultimately I turnedit on myself and in the book it
talks a little more about thatand, um, in the book talks a
(11:16):
little more about that.
But essentially, um, I my, myphone rings and there's no
reason I was going to answerthat phone for anybody at the
point, because I was just goingto go through with it, um, but I
did happen to glance at it andit was my sister calling and
that was the only person I wasgoing to answer that phone for.
Um, for a lot of differentreasons, but she has struggled
in so many different.
She's my older sister and shewas the one that told me try
things out, you're going to be akid, go for it, but don't ever
(11:38):
do heroin or meth, becauseyou'll probably lose your life
that way.
Those things are really hard tokick.
For whatever reason I never wentdown that route.
Oxycontin is actually I don'tlike the term gateway drug.
I had a lot of friends, though,that ended up doing heroin
because they couldn't afford Oxyanymore and just ruined their
lives.
And so, for long story shortagain, like my sister answered
(11:59):
that phone call and she justchanged my mindset.
It was like, oh, like, there'ssomebody that cares about me and
so I didn't go through with itobviously, and so that's kind of
the yeah that's what you tellin the book was you're grateful
for a phone call.
Right, just that one.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
thing that stopped you and you know it changed your
mindset, which I'm grateful forthat phone call and I'm
grateful for you sharing thestory.
You know, like our goal with allthis is that maybe there's one
person or there's somebody thatyou're you're listening to this
and you're like, wow, I knowthis kid that's going through a
really hard time this.
(12:37):
And you're like, wow, I knowthis kid that's going through a
really hard time, like sharezach's story.
And then you know like, maybethat will be his or her one
thing.
Yeah, um, also too is didn'tyou get arrested or end up in
jail?
Yeah, I got some of that too.
Like, yeah, you've got layers,it wasn't.
And I don't want to say justlike, oh, yeah, you were just on
Oxy or you were just drinking,like there are so many layers
(12:58):
and talk about, like how youused working out and how you
feel like God got you from goingto.
You know this kid who was ondrugs dealing drugs almost
commit suicide to like you goingand turning on another path
yeah, yeah, I think.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
So there was like the the obvious things that I think
are very important to highlightbut that seem obvious that may
not be, is like I was workingout, because a friend of mine
was working out and it was likeyou get muscles when you're a
younger guy and then you getgirls like that's the, the easy
math, right.
So but also it was the way youstarted feeling and then I felt
better.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
And I was like, oh, this is like, this is fun, but
it's also something that I'mgoing to get other things out of
right.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
So, and then, over time, I realized it was rewiring
my brain to handle suffering,essentially oh, interesting, and
because it's like once youstart pushing into reps or
pushing into running however youwant to look at it right it's
like you realize that you have apower to override that desire
to quit or stop.
(14:04):
And once you override thatquitting or stopping a couple
times, you're like, wow, thatfelt good.
I feel like a different personnow.
And that happened enough over acouple years that I realized
that I wasn't a victim to mycircumstances, which was easy
for me to go down that road,cause I was like I basically
messed up my life and like formost younger people, if you
don't get like high school orcollege right, and then like
(14:25):
your life's done, yeah, likethat's kind of the overall, like
that's how important adultsmake you feel about those like
four to eight years of your life, and that's something to keep
aware of too, because that thatfeeling is very real and it
affects the way young peoplethink.
Um, so long story short, thatthat workout, you see how like
it changes the neurology in mymind and then all of a sudden
(14:47):
I'm not as much of a victim andI'm starting to become more of a
go-getter, more ambitious to dothings um, and that's kind of
the spark.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Yeah, it's interesting you say that is like
this mentality of you know highschool, college.
If you don't do this, I alwaysthought if I gave a like
graduation or a high schoolcommencement or something like
that, it is around that aspect,because I think in high school,
especially in high school, youcan get labeled.
(15:16):
Certain, like you were eventalking about, we were this
group of guys, we were on theoutskirts, we had bullies, but
there was probably a labelaround and then that's who
defined you.
Somebody else has defined you.
And to always say, like there'sa start over point, you can
always start over.
So whatever defined you inschool, maybe you didn't make
(15:39):
good grades, maybe you didn'twork hard, maybe you weren't an
app, whatever it was, maybe youwere the bully, like, whatever
that is is tomorrow you canchoose to do something else.
And that's what I love aboutyour story was like you were in
this victim mindset.
You were turning to otherthings that we're not filling
(16:00):
any hole, helping you, but thenyou made a different choice and
the compound effect of thatdifferent choice, over and over
again, led you to the life thatyou have today yeah, and there
was plenty of failure.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
It was just like keep trying, yeah, and I think
that's one thing I do with mycoaching class.
It's like really drive thathome.
And we talk about the brushingthe teeth analogy, but it's so
true, it's like brush one toothtoday, or, sorry, floss one
tooth today and then you'll endup flossing all your teeth in
the next year, probably.
(16:33):
Right, that's how it works andwe're wired that way.
And once you can get rid oflike the, the shame, and then
also like the negative bias thatwe have just as human beings,
because that we're all like that, like we're wired that way, so
you just knowing that is helpfuland then saying, okay, I did do
something today that's going tomake me better, no matter how
small it is, stop measuring it.
(16:55):
It's just that one thing overtime really does compound.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Yeah, um, so many good points, and I want to thank
you for sharing your story,because I always know how
difficult it is for you, but Ido believe that, um, it will
help somebody.
Even if it helps one person,anything else that you want to
like wrap wrap up with, or afinal thought.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah, I think my story is kind of like one of
those more extreme stories.
My wife's testimony is nowherenear as extreme as mine and I've
heard people like my wife thatdon't have as extreme
testimonies be like well, I justdon't feel like I have.
There's always a story thereand that's important and it does
(17:40):
not need to be extreme.
And, trust me, if I couldchange, I would not have an
extreme story like that.
But for the people that don'thave anything extreme going on
in your life, I really challengeyou even more because you are
sitting somewhere betweencontentment and well, you're
just sitting in contentment ifyou're just kind of not pursuing
(18:04):
something in a way that youknow is directed from God,
essentially Right, and I hopethat you, out of the most,
really feel pull, because thereis something whispering in your
ear telling you what the nextthing to do is, and it probably
has nothing to do with yourself,it's probably fully selfless
(18:25):
and that's how you know you'regoing down the right road.
And I'll finish with a quickstory.
I can't remember his name.
The guy on shark tank that's onthere a lot.
He major depression, something.
I've struggled a lot, a lotover the years and for whatever
reason.
He ended up going to a soupkitchen and volunteering.
He didn't have any moneyproblem.
(18:45):
He had everything in the worldbut major depression.
He ended up volunteering for acouple weeks and it completely
changed his life and then hedidn't have depression anymore
over a couple weeks, when theywere happy to clinically declare
him extremely depressed, givehim medication, need therapy,
all the stuff.
But service was the thing thatpulled him out and I think all
of us again are bent in towardsourselves, me especially.
(19:09):
And the moment you can startlooking out what you can do for
other people.
It's funny how it works,because it will end up blessing
you more.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
Yeah, 100%.
I mean I love how you wrappedit up.
Although I'm the giving gal, Igive a gift every day, so I want
to put one caveat on.
It is yes, if you need therapy,a doctor, if you're struggling
with deep depression.
If you need help, go get that.
But I have seen that over andover again.
I mean there is science andresearch behind volunteerism.
(19:40):
Giving your acts of kindness,like it, physically does
something to your brain, andthat's what I mean.
I was in a depression when Istarted my giving journey and I
say that's how I got like now.
I have very few days that I amdepressed, but it was because
every day I was focusing on me,one person.
How can I make a difference inone other person's life?
I was getting that hit andyou're like, oh my gosh, this is
(20:01):
great.
Or you go serve.
And then when you go serve, soyou take this person who is very
wealthy, has everything, andthen you go serve the least of
these which the Bible tells us.
You know serving the least ofthese, those in prison, the
(20:22):
widows, the orphans.
When you do that, then yourealize like, oh my gosh, I have
so much to be grateful for.
And it's like this circle ofgiving and getting outside of
yourself.
And if you do that in the realmof where God is calling us to
give and serve, then you canbecome grateful for what you've
got and then you can give moreand it just like it just keeps
going.
So I love that.
What a great way to wrap up.
Thank you so much, and allthese ways I appreciate, zach.
(20:47):
So one tell your story, becauseit's always going to impact
somebody, and this is justanother way that you can get to
giving your best life.
Hey friends, it's Stephanie here with Giving your
Best Life Podcast, and my friend.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Zach Lloyd sustainable anti-diet coach.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
Wonderful, and today we're going to talk about being
uncomfortable because Zach isgoing to be very uncomfortable
with the topic that we'retalking today, but sometimes in
life we have to do things thatwe're uncomfortable with.
So Zach has been a guest on thepodcast.
I just see now you're like theco-host every other episode
because he is coming on here andjust as like a reminder of why.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
Zach's here.
Speaker 1 (00:32):
I would love for you to share why you think you're
here, but for me it's like thisis our health and wellness.
What we eat what we put intoour body, like taking care of
ourselves it is a big part ofgiving your best life, because
if you don't have your health,you don't have anything,
anything else to share.
Yeah, I mean, that sums it up100, perfect.
Speaker 2 (00:49):
Yeah, we're on the same page.
How do you give your best lifeif you're not healthy or on a on
a sustainable path to get gethealthy?
Great um.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
so, anyways, I want to back up a little bit and talk
about um, like how I really gotto know zach on a different
level and he has an amazingstory that I would love for him
to share with my audience.
But um and we've been friendsfor a while.
We actually talked today it wasseven years since we met.
Because he didn't get to theday on april 1st, uh, because I
(01:21):
had done an interview on apodcast that he was working on,
the Giving Challenge, and so onmy next book, the Gratitude
Challenge, I had been workingout with Zach.
He was my coach and as I'mwriting this book, I was
collecting stories from otherpeople.
So most of the stories in thebook are mine, but a few are not
, and so I just see now, zach,use gratitude around the gym and
(01:46):
even online.
You seem very happy, verygrateful.
Do you want to talk a littlebit about that, like what I saw
from the outside, not knowingyour story?
Speaker 2 (01:56):
Yeah, well, what did you see from the outside?
Speaker 1 (01:59):
This like you're always very happy, you like?
Speaker 2 (02:02):
yeah, I mean, I truly am passionate about working out
, lifting weights, however youwant to put it, not just weights
, just getting active like justbeing active, like living in
indiana is very hard for mesometimes because I like to be
in the mountains so much andbeing active in the mountains
and any different season doesn'tmatter that just truly fuels me
.
But the passion to just bemoving is is huge in my life,
(02:25):
right?
Speaker 1 (02:25):
so I think that's kind of weird, yeah, and like we
would work out at six in themorning and I would just show up
and I don't know.
I just was like, wow, this guy,he's got it.
So can you write somethingabout gratitude and how you're?
You just seem happy and so he,he says yes to writing, but when
(02:45):
he sends it to me it is hisstory.
That I had no idea.
Yeah, like I remember one I wasso grateful that you felt like
you could trust me with yourstory.
Um, but then I was like what doI do with this?
And we even talked like it madeit into the book, so the
gratitude challenge, zach'sstory's in there.
(03:07):
But even up till I think I wasgetting ready to print, you
weren't for sure if you wantedme to print it yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
So I said I remember that.
I remember the very moment Isat down to write it and I was
like, oh great, this is going tobe tough.
Like what do I even write aboutrelated to gratitude and and
just you know, staring at thecomputer for a while then
something started coming out andthen it was one of those few
times in my life where I feellike it was just a download from
God.
It was the Holy Spirit justtold me what to write and it
(03:36):
wasn't really me writing it.
And then, after I had writtenit, I looked down like this is
pretty personable, personal,vulnerable, um, and out of my
comfort zone.
But I've again.
I had no idea what I was goingto write that day.
It just happened, and so Iturned it into you and said this
(03:58):
is what I got.
What do you want to?
Speaker 1 (03:59):
do with it.
Yeah, I remember we meeting andlike talking over.
I think I probably cried alittle bit because I I just
didn't know, and I think it's agood um like topic of you never
know what people's lives are.
You never know what they'regoing through.
Like I was viewing Zach throughour 6am sessions.
He's got energy, he alwaysseems happy, he seems grateful.
(04:22):
That was the surface.
That's what I asked him towrite about.
And then I read your story andI'm like, wow, we never know
what people have gone through,their struggles, how they got to
where they are.
So, um, that to touch on that.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
how you perceive me is very fascinating to me, so
cause it's weird if I say it,but the fact that you just said
it I can hit on it.
So you said you perceive me asenergetic, uh, like upbeat, what
was that?
Yeah, like happy, happy, yeah,okay.
So I get that a lot right, andespecially on like a lot of the
videos I do.
I get that a lot because myvideos are like that, they're
high energy.
(04:55):
I'm not like that all day,thank goodness.
My wife is very thankful forthat.
But, um, part part of that isbecause I have been so hopeless
and miserable in my past that Ireally value.
And this is not like aday-to-day thing where I think
about all the time like or elseI wouldn't be human Right, but
(05:15):
like, if I really step back andthink about why I do what I do,
it's because of that, because Iknow how dark this world can get
and bring you down and get tothe point of like pure
hopelessness, and so that's onereason why I really am so
passionate about what I do isbecause whoever is on the other
end of the video or theconversation that I'm having,
(05:35):
like I believe in you so muchbecause I am not special by any
means at all in the slightestbit, if anything, I'm below
average.
I really feel that and if I canget out of that dark hole than
anybody can and again, it wasn'tme doing it like working out
was part of it, yada, yada, yada, but ultimately it was by god's
(05:57):
grace alone, right and all ofus have that, so that's kind of
why I do it yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:03):
So we've been dancing around like the dark hole, but
you do have a story that, Ithink, does give other people
hope, because they do look atyou.
Whether you like it or not,they look at you, know, like
(06:23):
look at it, I mean you have itor not.
They look at you and they'relike look at Zach, I mean you
have an amazing life, abeautiful wife, like the best
wife.
I love your wife.
You have beautiful kids, andpeople can look at your life and
go, oh, zach has a perfect life.
And actually, though, like yousaid, god saved you.
I feel like his hand came down,saved your life, and I want
people to hear that.
(06:43):
So, if you're listening to us,rip, or you see us on social
media and you're like look atyou, two perfect people, it's
like, no, look what God has done.
So do you want to?
Yeah, for sure?
Speaker 2 (06:53):
So, yeah, I'll kind of just long story short.
And then you asked you say if Iskip over it, okay, um, during
middle school and high school Iwas bullied a lot and that
really played a part into myhigh school experience as it got
progressively worse and the waythat I kind of looked at myself
and like a best friend at thetime supposedly best friend just
(07:15):
kind of like ended up sidingwith the bullies again long
story short and then liketreating me in such a terrible
way and then aligned with themand I thought he was my best
friend so there's like betrayalis all that typical high school
stuff.
It feels like relatively typicalthe way that.
I handled it though, was nottalking to anybody, not reaching
out to anybody, not asking forhelp, not telling anybody how I
(07:37):
feel that was the last thing Iwould do is tell them the
outfield.
It was like, you know, kind ofthink until you make it
situation, and then I kind of Istart experimenting with kind of
like drugs till you make itsituation, and then, um, I kind
of I start, um, experimentingwith kind of like drugs and
alcohol a little bit, and then Istart to find this group of
people that are a lot like me,where they're kind of like on
the outskirts of the normal,like high school kids, and what
(07:59):
I mean by that is like reallylike they just marched to their
own beat and they did not carewhat other people thought of
them, and somehow, one way oranother, I started becoming
friends with one of them, andthen it became a group, and then
, all of a sudden, it's likethis is awesome, because, like I
can say screw you to everybodythat didn't like me or bullied
me.
And then I have a like-mindedindividuals that feel the same
way about pretty much everything, and that's where we could just
(08:21):
kind of cause destruction inour own ways, and whatever that
turned into, and then, slowlybut surely, over the next couple
years, as I graduated highschool, after, you know, trying
different drugs here or there,um, I became, uh, hooked on
oxycontin and I had a lot offriends, same thing.
And one day is before I wassaved, um, I was driving my car
(08:44):
and I just I knew that if I keptgoing down that road, it's just
one of those weird momentswhere I was having such a bad
morning because I was sohungover from oxycontin the
night before, and and I just Iknew that I had to make a change
.
And it's funny because, likegod saved me, I was having such
a bad morning because I was sohungover from Oxycontin the
night before and the nightbefore, and I just I knew that I
had to make a change.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
And it's funny because, like God saved me
through an Eminem song which islike you know, like that's how
God works, I think that's a booktitle, yeah right.
Speaker 2 (09:09):
And so it's not afraid.
And in the rap, like Eminemtalks about not being afraid and
to like stand up to your demons, whether they're like in front
of you or the inner demons.
And ultimately that moment Iwasn't saved.
But looking back, that was aspiritual moment for me because
I never went back to Oxycontinafter that day and talked to
(09:30):
anybody that's been hooked onany type of drug like that, like
you don't just give it up inone day.
And yeah, there was like theside effects and stuff like that
.
But I got through that and ahuge part of that was also
working out, and working outended up becoming that new drug
for me in a healthier way.
But I had to deal with thatdown the road later.
That's another story.
(09:50):
But long story short.
A little before that in highschool, my girlfriend at the
time breaks up with me and itwasn't sadness about her
breaking up with me, it wasbecause I was a terrible
boyfriend, I was just a.
I mean, how could I be a goodboyfriend in any way, shape or
form?
It was more about control, allabout control, and I had been
(10:15):
messing around with her for solong and she finally had enough,
like about time.
And when she finally had enough, I realized I had no more
control in my life.
Like that was the last thing Ifelt like I had control over was
her, and like a messed up way,obviously right.
And so I was like what, what amI doing with my life?
(10:35):
Like, what do I?
Got going for me, you know, Iwas supposed to go to university
of oregon and be a duck and,like, have a college experience
and I've always been super, youknow, book smart or whatever,
get good grades, yada, yada.
Like that was not the path thatwas turning out for me.
And I found myself in my car atthe time and I had a Glock 45,
(10:56):
which I was using to sell drugswith but only part of the story,
fun fact and I was not like oneof those people who was looking
for a reason to use it, but Ihad it because I was willing to
use it and ultimately I turnedit on myself and in the book it
talks a little more about thatand, um, in the book talks a
(11:16):
little more about that.
But essentially, um, I my, myphone rings and there's no
reason I was going to answerthat phone for anybody at the
point, because I was just goingto go through with it, um, but I
did happen to glance at it andit was my sister calling and
that was the only person I wasgoing to answer that phone for.
Um, for a lot of differentreasons, but she has struggled
in so many different.
She's my older sister and shewas the one that told me try
things out, you're going to be akid, go for it, but don't ever
(11:38):
do heroin or meth, becauseyou'll probably lose your life
that way.
Those things are really hard tokick.
For whatever reason I never wentdown that route.
Oxycontin is actually I don'tlike the term gateway drug.
I had a lot of friends, though,that ended up doing heroin
because they couldn't afford Oxyanymore and just ruined their
lives.
And so, for long story shortagain, like my sister answered
(11:59):
that phone call and she justchanged my mindset.
It was like, oh, like, there'ssomebody that cares about me and
so I didn't go through with itobviously, and so that's kind of
the yeah that's what you tellin the book was you're grateful
for a phone call.
Right, just that one.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
thing that stopped you and you know it changed your
mindset, which I'm grateful forthat phone call and I'm
grateful for you sharing thestory.
You know, like our goal with allthis is that maybe there's one
person or there's somebody thatyou're you're listening to this
and you're like, wow, I knowthis kid that's going through a
really hard time this.
(12:37):
And you're like, wow, I knowthis kid that's going through a
really hard time, like sharezach's story.
And then you know like, maybethat will be his or her one
thing.
Yeah, um, also too is didn'tyou get arrested or end up in
jail?
Yeah, I got some of that too.
Like, yeah, you've got layers,it wasn't.
And I don't want to say justlike, oh, yeah, you were just on
Oxy or you were just drinking,like there are so many layers
(12:58):
and talk about, like how youused working out and how you
feel like God got you from goingto.
You know this kid who was ondrugs dealing drugs almost
commit suicide to like you goingand turning on another path
yeah, yeah, I think.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
So there was like the the obvious things that I think
are very important to highlightbut that seem obvious that may
not be, is like I was workingout, because a friend of mine
was working out and it was likeyou get muscles when you're a
younger guy and then you getgirls like that's the, the easy
math, right.
So but also it was the way youstarted feeling and then I felt
better.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
And I was like, oh, this is like, this is fun, but
it's also something that I'mgoing to get other things out of
right.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
So, and then, over time, I realized it was rewiring
my brain to handle suffering,essentially oh, interesting, and
because it's like once youstart pushing into reps or
pushing into running however youwant to look at it right it's
like you realize that you have apower to override that desire
to quit or stop.
(14:04):
And once you override thatquitting or stopping a couple
times, you're like, wow, thatfelt good.
I feel like a different personnow.
And that happened enough over acouple years that I realized
that I wasn't a victim to mycircumstances, which was easy
for me to go down that road,cause I was like I basically
messed up my life and like formost younger people, if you
don't get like high school orcollege right, and then like
(14:25):
your life's done, yeah, likethat's kind of the overall, like
that's how important adultsmake you feel about those like
four to eight years of your life, and that's something to keep
aware of too, because that thatfeeling is very real and it
affects the way young peoplethink.
Um, so long story short, thatthat workout, you see how like
it changes the neurology in mymind and then all of a sudden
(14:47):
I'm not as much of a victim andI'm starting to become more of a
go-getter, more ambitious to dothings um, and that's kind of
the spark.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
Yeah, it's interesting you say that is like
this mentality of you know highschool, college.
If you don't do this, I alwaysthought if I gave a like
graduation or a high schoolcommencement or something like
that, it is around that aspect,because I think in high school,
especially in high school, youcan get labeled.
(15:16):
Certain, like you were eventalking about, we were this
group of guys, we were on theoutskirts, we had bullies, but
there was probably a labelaround and then that's who
defined you.
Somebody else has defined you.
And to always say, like there'sa start over point, you can
always start over.
So whatever defined you inschool, maybe you didn't make
(15:39):
good grades, maybe you didn'twork hard, maybe you weren't an
app, whatever it was, maybe youwere the bully, like, whatever
that is is tomorrow you canchoose to do something else.
And that's what I love aboutyour story was like you were in
this victim mindset.
You were turning to otherthings that we're not filling
(16:00):
any hole, helping you, but thenyou made a different choice and
the compound effect of thatdifferent choice, over and over
again, led you to the life thatyou have today yeah, and there
was plenty of failure.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
It was just like keep trying, yeah, and I think
that's one thing I do with mycoaching class.
It's like really drive thathome.
And we talk about the brushingthe teeth analogy, but it's so
true, it's like brush one toothtoday, or, sorry, floss one
tooth today and then you'll endup flossing all your teeth in
the next year, probably.
(16:33):
Right, that's how it works andwe're wired that way.
And once you can get rid oflike the, the shame, and then
also like the negative bias thatwe have just as human beings,
because that we're all like that, like we're wired that way, so
you just knowing that is helpfuland then saying, okay, I did do
something today that's going tomake me better, no matter how
small it is, stop measuring it.
(16:55):
It's just that one thing overtime really does compound.
Speaker 1 (16:58):
Yeah, um, so many good points, and I want to thank
you for sharing your story,because I always know how
difficult it is for you, but Ido believe that, um, it will
help somebody.
Even if it helps one person,anything else that you want to
like wrap wrap up with, or afinal thought.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah, I think my story is kind of like one of
those more extreme stories.
My wife's testimony is nowherenear as extreme as mine and I've
heard people like my wife thatdon't have as extreme
testimonies be like well, I justdon't feel like I have.
There's always a story thereand that's important and it does
(17:40):
not need to be extreme.
And, trust me, if I couldchange, I would not have an
extreme story like that.
But for the people that don'thave anything extreme going on
in your life, I really challengeyou even more because you are
sitting somewhere betweencontentment and well, you're
just sitting in contentment ifyou're just kind of not pursuing
(18:04):
something in a way that youknow is directed from God,
essentially Right, and I hopethat you, out of the most,
really feel pull, because thereis something whispering in your
ear telling you what the nextthing to do is, and it probably
has nothing to do with yourself,it's probably fully selfless
(18:25):
and that's how you know you'regoing down the right road.
And I'll finish with a quickstory.
I can't remember his name.
The guy on shark tank that's onthere a lot.
He major depression, something.
I've struggled a lot, a lotover the years and for whatever
reason.
He ended up going to a soupkitchen and volunteering.
He didn't have any moneyproblem.
(18:45):
He had everything in the worldbut major depression.
He ended up volunteering for acouple weeks and it completely
changed his life and then hedidn't have depression anymore
over a couple weeks, when theywere happy to clinically declare
him extremely depressed, givehim medication, need therapy,
all the stuff.
But service was the thing thatpulled him out and I think all
of us again are bent in towardsourselves, me especially.
(19:09):
And the moment you can startlooking out what you can do for
other people.
It's funny how it works,because it will end up blessing
you more.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
Yeah, 100%.
I mean I love how you wrappedit up.
Although I'm the giving gal, Igive a gift every day, so I want
to put one caveat on.
It is yes, if you need therapy,a doctor, if you're struggling
with deep depression.
If you need help, go get that.
But I have seen that over andover again.
I mean there is science andresearch behind volunteerism.
(19:40):
Giving your acts of kindness,like it, physically does
something to your brain, andthat's what I mean.
I was in a depression when Istarted my giving journey and I
say that's how I got like now.
I have very few days that I amdepressed, but it was because
every day I was focusing on me,one person.
How can I make a difference inone other person's life?
I was getting that hit andyou're like, oh my gosh, this is
(20:01):
great.
Or you go serve.
And then when you go serve, soyou take this person who is very
wealthy, has everything, andthen you go serve the least of
these which the Bible tells us.
You know serving the least ofthese, those in prison, the
(20:22):
widows, the orphans.
When you do that, then yourealize like, oh my gosh, I have
so much to be grateful for.
And it's like this circle ofgiving and getting outside of
yourself.
And if you do that in the realmof where God is calling us to
give and serve, then you canbecome grateful for what you've
got and then you can give moreand it just like it just keeps
going.
So I love that.
What a great way to wrap up.
Thank you so much, and allthese ways I appreciate, zach.
(20:47):
So one tell your story, becauseit's always going to impact
somebody, and this is justanother way that you can get to
giving your best life.
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