When Obedience Feels Like Failure: what God might REALLY be doing...

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*DISCLAIMER: we had slight audio issues during the recording process. Because I live by authenticity and speaking what's on my heart from the holy spirit during the time of this recording, we chose not to re-record this episode and leave it as is. I hope you still enjoy and find inspiration in this episode, despite it's flaws 😂
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You’ve been obedient. You’ve been consistent. You’ve done the thing God asked you to do... but it’s still not working the way you hoped. 

In this episode, we’re unpacking what’s really happening when your obedience feels like failure. Because my friend...what feels like a setback in your business or calling might actually be the setup for something greater. Let’s shift your perspective, strengthen your faith, and remind you that God hasn’t forgotten you or what He's called you to do! 

In today’s episode, we’re going heart-first into:
👉🏽 Why you’re not failing (even if it feels like you are)
👉🏽 Five powerful reasons God might allow “failure” in your faith-led business
👉🏽 How to hold steady in your calling when the results don’t match your obedience
You’re not alone in this. God sees your effort…and He’s doing more than you think.

⏰ Timestamps:
 00:00 – That hard feeling: doing what God said...and still “failing”
 04:00 – Two areas I kept bumping into failure
 07:00 – Why the fruits of the Spirit matter in this season
 13:00 – Success might be showing up in a different package
 18:00 – The small wins you’re overlooking
 21:00 – God might be building your capacity
 24:00 – Your “failure” could be someone else’s breakthrough
 25:00 – So what do we do while we wait?
 27:00 – Obedience over outcome
 28:00 – Letting God be enough...even when it hurts
 30:00 – Don’t just notice the small wins—pursue them

If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend who could use some encouragement today! 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker (00:00):
let's talk about that feeling, where you have been
putting in effort, beingobedient, trying and trying
again, being consistent, and yetnothing seems to be working.
I truly believe that this is oneof the hardest seasons to be in

(00:20):
because it's one thing to be ina season where you are either
intentionally or unintentionallybeing.
Disobedient to what God iscalling you to do and therefore
making progress along that path.
That's one thing.
But when you are in a season oftrying and putting in effort and
obeying what God is calling youto do, no matter how big, how

(00:40):
small, little step, big step,whatever that looks like, you're
just trying.
You're attempting, but yet youdon't see any results.
Maybe it's been a month.
Of you being in that season?
Maybe it's been a year.
You know what?
Maybe it's been 10 years andyou're just like what are you
doing?

(01:00):
Why does it seem like me obeyingwhat you're calling me to do?
Me going in the direction that Itruly believe that you're
calling me to?
Why does it seem like I amfailing?
Such a tough season to be init's a real feeling.
You have a lot of questionsthere's a lot that you're not
understanding.

(01:20):
There are things that are notmaking sense.
Because in our brains, in ourspirits, we believe that if we
do what God is calling us to do,if we pursue it full-heartedly,
he will bless it.
He will pave the way.
He will shine a lamp to oursteps.
Everything will be okay.
We believe that.
But yet when we go about it andwe find ourselves feeling like

(01:45):
we're constantly failing,constantly bumping into things,
just not working.
They're not working well,something's not right.
There's always something thatseems off.
It is tough and it can reallymake you feel depressed.
Let's be honest.
Obeying God and finding joy inthat, but then bumping into

(02:09):
failure makes you feeldepressed.
It makes you question if you'reeven on the right path, and it
makes you wonder if there's evena way out of this.
Here's what I've learned.
Anytime you are obeying in doingwhat God is calling you to do,
but yet you feel like you'refailing in it, my friend.

(02:32):
That feeling is lying to you.
Your human perspective is seeingthis as failure.
What we need to do is transitioninto our spiritual perspective.
In seeing it as somethingcompletely different that just
so happens to be falselydisguised as the failure that

(02:54):
our human brains are seeing itas.
That's how we comprehend it.
What's really happening.
Is that God is doing something.
God doesn't call you tosomething just for you to fail
and to fail again.
And to fail again, and to feelhopeless, and to be in moments
of despair and to be in thiseverlasting depression.

(03:15):
No, that is false.
And if you feel that, if youeven think that, if you're
questioning that, then we needto ask ourselves, am I leaning
into the spirit?
Or am I leaning into my humanemotions and allowing the enemy
to take that and deceive me withthe human emotions that I'm
feeling?
What is God really doing andyour calling and your

(03:39):
aspirations in your endeavorthat you feel like you're just
failing in, but in actuality,God is doing something that
you're just not quite seeingyet.
So what could God be doing?
I am never the one to give you astraight up correct answer as to
what God is exactly doing inyour life because that is

(04:00):
something that he ultimatelyonly knows.
But what I can do, is give avariety of reasons as to what he
might be trying to do in yourlife, in your calling that end
up working out for good.
Because he knows what's best.
So if you've been feeling down,if you've been feeling hopeless,
if you've been feeling like afailure, my friend, you are in

(04:24):
the right place at the righttime, and I'm so looking forward
to chatting with you, having aconversation with you about this
today.
There are two areas of my liferecently where I felt like I
just kept bumping into failure.
one of them was a launch in mybusiness where I thought it was

(04:44):
gonna do so well, and I justkept trying to pivot it and work
on it and figure out what wouldsimply just work.
And it's been a year longprocess of me trying to figure
out how to make this specificlaunch over this specific thing
work, and it's been really toughto the point where I felt like
I'm just failing at this.

(05:05):
Do I need to give this up?
Is this just not right?
When deep down I knew that Godwas calling me to this and I
just simply haven't found apathway that works just yet On
the other end, I felt like I wasbumping into back to back
moments of failure no matterwhat I did when it came to my

(05:25):
emotional growth.
To be transparent with you,that's something that I'm really
working on in my life.
I am extremely sensitive.
I struggle in emotionalmanagement, and something that
I'm learning is to steward myemotions better, so much to the
point where I am.
More emotionally wise throughthe spirit to the point where my
emotional intelligence is justfinally mastered.

(05:48):
But every time I try, every timeI attempt, it just seems like I
keep failing or I can't get itright.
And through these experiences,I've learned to change my
perspective.
From getting frustrated andfeeling like I'm failing and
feeling like I just can't get itright.
What is wrong with me?

(06:09):
To instead thinking, what couldGod be doing through these
things, through these momentsthat feel like failure to me?
What could he be doing thatultimately are gonna transform
me for the better that are gonnawork out for my ultimate good?
and as I was preparing for thisepisode today, I came up with a
few core things that God couldbe doing in your moments of

(06:32):
failure.
When you are just trying to obeywhat he is calling you to do.
The first one is God could betesting.
If you have the fruits of thespirit, now let's all get on the
same page and just take a quicksecond to understand what the
fruits of the spirit are.

(06:54):
The fruits of the spirit is whatis produced.
It is the outcome.
It is the result of you takingon the character of Jesus
himself.
You aren't just accepting Jesusas your Lord and Savior, you are
living like Jesus.
You are reflecting the characterof God.
And when you do, the fruits ofthe Spirit are emancipated out

(07:16):
of you as a light for people tosee, for you to feel for how you
act So what are those fruits?
There's nine of'em.
Okay, we ready?
Love, joy, peace, patient.
Patience, kindness, goodness,faithfulness, gentleness.

(07:41):
And self-control.
I want you to take a moment toreflect on the words that I just
said, the fruits of the spirit,and I want you to ask yourself,
where am I falling short on anyof these?
This isn't a finger pointbecause I believe we all fall
short from time to time on atleast one of these.

(08:02):
Why?
Because life can take us out.
Chasing after a calling that Godis calling us to is tough.
reflecting these fruits of thespirit oftentimes can feel
impossible even though they'renot.
Sometimes they can feelimpossible when we're just going
through it and when our mindsare so clouded by the negative
thoughts and insecurities anddoubts and feelings of failure,

(08:25):
that we are feeling heavily.
So just ask yourself, where am Ifalling short?
Because I've noticed a lot oftimes with Christians, people
who say that they believe inGod, they believe in Jesus,
myself included.
We say that we believe.
We say that we're trying to livelike Christ.
But yet we're not taking thetime to really focus and zero in

(08:47):
on specific fruits of the spiritthat we desperately need to work
on.
Sometimes we might think that wehave them.
We might think that we're fine.
We might think that because Goddoesn't expect us to be perfect,
that we don't need to work onperfecting the fruits of the
spirit being emancipated out ofus.
Us.
This is where we need to becareful because although yes,

(09:09):
you will never be perfect.
You will always be a work inprogress.
That doesn't mean that youshouldn't be putting in every
effort, every effort to reflectthe character of God in your
life, and the outcome of thatbeing the fruits of the spirit
themselves.
I have been tested in thisgreatly where I thought that I

(09:31):
was kind, God had to test mewhere I thought that I was
patient.
God had to test me where Ithought I had self-control.
God had to test me, and I trulybelieve that in seasons where we
feel like we're bumping intoback to back moments of failure,
especially when we're trying tobe obedient and doing what God
is calling us to do, a bigreason for that could be.

(09:53):
That God simply revealing thetruth behind yourself.
Do you really have the fruits ofthe spirit?
Are they real rather than thembeing a facade?
they lasting rather than thembeing temporary?
I think a big one for us whenwe're pursuing our callings is

(10:15):
patience.
We struggle with patiencebecause we just wanna get there.
We just wanna achieve the dream,get the result.
Finally feel an ounce ofsuccess, but that's the problem.
It's in your timeline.
It's not in God's because if itwas in God's timeline, you would

(10:35):
have more patience as you pursuewhat he's calling you to do.
You wouldn't be so hard onyourself because you would
realize that even though thismight not seem to be working in
the timeline, that you thought,you know that God has called you
to this.
So you are patient in believinghis timeline, his when over that
thing, over when it comes tofruition.

(10:56):
I would encourage you.
To look at the fruits of thespirit and genuinely study them.
What do they mean?
And take the time to pick one ortwo that you feel you are
struggling with the most andintentionally work on it.
When you do that, you pivot yourfocus from the chase of no
longer being in failure, butgetting to success.

(11:18):
And instead you focus on.
Developing more of the characterof God in you through the season
of your life.
It's a different chase.
One is chasing success in yourcalling.
The other is chasing God withinyourself.
And I believe that when we learnto chase God.

(11:41):
Within ourselves reflecting thecharacter of God within
ourselves.
We will start to find moremoments of things working of
success happening within ourcallings, within what it is that
we're pursuing.
Another thing that God could bedoing.
If you feel like you're bumpinginto back-to-back moments of

(12:02):
failure within your obedience,your consistency, your effort,
your overall calling and abilityin just trying God could be
creating success for youelsewhere.
You thought that chasing afteryour calling, the success of
that, the outcome of that lookeda specific way.

(12:23):
It came in a specific package,but maybe God is bringing it to
you in a different way, in adifferent package.
You know that success means waymore than money, more than
status a lot of times we getinto the habit of viewing
success as just that.
Around finances, around ourstatus and how well we're doing

(12:46):
publicly.
It's more than that.
Even around things like weightloss and looking our absolute
best, it is way more than that.
And I gotta check myself on thattoo, because a lot of times my
brain will believe success isjust that when it's not.
So when you're focused onfeeling like you failed in an
area of your calling, that hasto do with money or status in

(13:10):
any degree, in any variation,you are dismissing other areas
that could be succeeding.
You're blind to it.
You're not even seeing itbecause you're so caught up in
the failure of trying to chaseafter that success, that
specific kind of success in yourcalling.
I'm gonna give you an example.
What if in my case, instead oflooking at.

(13:33):
The launch that I was trying tofigure out for the specific
offer over the past year thatdidn't seem to be working no
matter what I tried, even thoughI knew God was calling me to do
this thing.
what if instead of me viewingthat as a failure and me not
succeeding in that, what if Ichanged my perspective and
started looking around otherareas?

(13:57):
Of my calling that were actuallysucceeding.
This might take some meditationon your part where you really
need to think through and digdeep because those successes
might feel hidden to you or theymight feel small in comparison
to your big picture vision foryour calling, for your business,
for that creative thing that youwanna put out there.

(14:18):
But the small hidden successesmatter too.
And maybe just maybe God hasbeen trying to deliver these
areas, these smaller areas ofsuccess for you that you have
not been seeing because you'refocused on these bigger areas
that feel like failure.
So if I reflect on that in thesituation of the launch that I

(14:40):
was referring to, there's manysmall successes.
One is the skillset I learnedjust by creating it.
I got so good at designingcertain aspects.
Of a launch.
When it came to the tech, whenit came to designing landing

(15:01):
pages, when it came to having avisual eye, when it came to
authenticity, I got so good atit and I wouldn't have gotten
good.
I would not have built thatskillset and succeeded in that
skillset had I not tried, had Inot done what God was calling me
to do.
But I wasn't seeing those assuccesses.

(15:23):
I was focused on the big picturevision of it, just not working,
feeling like an ultimatefailure.
But I had to think about thelittle successes that were
actually gained.
And my visual eye is so goodnow.
It's so skilled now.
I truly believe this, and myvisual eye is so good now that I
have people asking me for advicewhen it comes to interior

(15:43):
design, when it comes to graphicdesigns and social media designs
and websites.
And it just makes me reflect on,wow, God built that skillset in
me from me trying to build thislaunch.
That felt like a failure, butwas it really?
Was it?
And then even the example.
That I gave earlier in regardsto me feeling like a failure in

(16:06):
trying to become much moreemotionally intelligent.
What package of success did Godbring my way from me?
Obeying that.
Well, even though it might feellike a failure, because I
haven't necessarily mastered myreactions and responses to
things I have mastered myawareness to when it comes up,

(16:27):
rather than jumping right intoemotionally reacting or
responding to something.
Like I used to.
there's a step that is nowcoming before that where my
brain is aware.
My brain is saying, oh, angel,you're getting worked up.
Angel, your emotions are comingout.
Angel, this is starting totrigger you.
Maybe let's step away.
Maybe let's go for a walk.

(16:48):
Maybe let's get on your kneesand pray.
That wasn't there before.
So yeah, even though I stillmight react and respond
emotionally immature in someregard, there's this first step
of awareness that I've learnedthat is a little package of
success, of, wow, you'vemastered this area over here,
you're doing great in.
So these are just my examples,but I really want you to think

(17:10):
about that for yourself.
Where you feel like you'refailing, look around it.
What small things are youactually succeeding in in that
regard that God delivered as apackage to you that you're
dismissing because you're toofocused on the failure of the
bigger picture, ultimate result.
Another thing that God could bedoing when it comes to you
feeling like you failed in yourcalling, he could be building

(17:33):
your capacity.
A lot of times when we'reobeying and doing what God is
calling us to do, we're puttingin effort, we're testing, we're
trying.
That takes a lot of steps, notjust physical, but mental
exertion as well.
It's a strain on usholistically, physically,
mentally, spiritually,emotionally, because we're
trying, and a lot of times thattrying causes us to be out of

(17:55):
our comfort zone, which is hardfor us.
So when we do that and whenwe're bumping into moments of
failure, rather than saying,man, I have failed at this.
Why isn't this working?
What is wrong with me?
What if you said.
How is God building my capacityin what feels like a failure,
but really isn't?
How is he building my ability tohandle pivots, to handle waiting

(18:19):
seasons, to handle consistency?
To make space when things aren'tgoing my way, how is he building
my capacity and overall maturityin handling those things.
Something that I've beenthinking so much about lately is
whatever challenge I'm goingthrough right now, I am learning
something in this that is goingto prepare me for my next season

(18:42):
of life.
How God is teaching me to buildcapacity and maturity in my life
right now is going to set me upfor success as a future mother.
How God is teaching me to buildcapacity and maturity right now
is going to set me up forsuccess when it comes to me
finally paying off all of mydebts, reaching financial
freedom and earning sevenfigures.
Me learning to build capacitynow is going to set me up for

(19:04):
success, to be able to handleand carry what God has in store
for me in the future, to be ableto learn how to balance family
and work and dreams and peopleand relationships and health my
connection with God all at thesame time.
What if God is simply trying tobuild your capacity, and the

(19:26):
only way for him to do that inyou is to bring you through
moments of what feels likefailure in what he's called you
to do.
and this also relates to growingyour faith.
I truly believe that waitingseasons happen to strengthen our
faith.
Failures, challenges,circumstances, heartaches.

(19:47):
They can either take us deepdown into a dark place or they
can strengthen our faith.
You get to decide which way yougo.
last, but not least in yourmoments where you feel like
you're just failing.
In your calling, in yourbusiness, whatever it might be,
God could be using you as avessel to someone else.

(20:08):
A lot of times when we arechasing after our calling, do we
think about the people that wewant to impact the mission?
Absolutely.
But let's be honest, we alsothink about how this benefits
us.
How does this benefit mefinancially?
How does this serve me in thisway?
How does this get me outta mynine to five?
How does this shape me to bemore confident?

(20:29):
How me, me, me, how does this dothis for me?
We think about those things.
It's the priority when you areleading and prioritizing what
you are doing.
When you are prioritizing yourcalling, serving you over your
calling, first and foremost,serving God, and then serving
others through you, then it's aproblem and it's something that

(20:51):
we all, I think, have to checkour hearts on.
because what if.
Even though it feels like afailure to you, what if God is
instead using you as a vesselfor someone else's success?
That's a hard reality, right?
Because we all, we wanna succeedtoo.
But what if through your chaseof this calling and the success

(21:13):
in that, what if along the wayof trying and putting in effort,
even though you feel like you'refailing, what if a conversation
you had with someone along theway, the stories you've shared
along the way, the people thatare seeing it along the way.
Even if it may not have workedin the way you thought it would,
what if that's all it took forsomeone to see that even a

(21:34):
little bit for it to create anysort of ounce of transformation,
a tiny seed planted for them togrow, for them to succeed in
something, for them to feel likean idea was sparked in their
mind.
What if that was needed for theprogress of someone else?
This one's a tough one to thinkabout because I do think that

(21:54):
this one also requires us tomeditate on this, but ultimately
it's really essential for us toconstantly check our heart's
posture.
Because if we are only focusingon our failure we're referencing
that failure in regards to ourlives.
How is this failing in my life?
Rather than, how could this beplanting a seed or progressing

(22:18):
someone else in their life?
You just never know.
But the beauty of that istrusting God with what he might
be doing in what feels like afailure to you, but really
isn't.
Okay.
So I gave a lot of reasons, alot of things that God could
potentially be doing in yourlife as you're facing these
moments of failure in yourbusiness, you're calling
whatever it might be, but how dowe position ourselves better?

(22:41):
What can we do?
we feel the emotions of thatfailure.
Okay?
We feel the effects of that.
It's depressing.
So how do we change our posture,change our perspective?
What do we even do so that we'reno longer feeling depressed by
what seems like failure?
And instead we're trusting Godwith the beauty of what he's
doing behind the scenes of thatfirst thing that I'll say, stop

(23:03):
focusing on the failure.
Start focusing on the obedience.
You bypassed, dismissed,underplayed, you taking action,
you obeying God, you doing whathe's calling you to do in your
calling.
It's like once we get going withthat and we're on a roll, We
downplay that act of obediencebecause we're so focused on the
results that that obedience willproduce, and we forget about the

(23:26):
obedience in and of itself.
Stop focusing on the failure andshift to the fact that you're
just being obedient.
You are being obedient when itsucceeds, when it fails, when
it's stagnant, when it's makingprogress, you are being obedient
and you have this steadiness.
And just focusing on obedienceover the failure itself because

(23:48):
you trust God and you know thatas long as you obey what he's
calling you to do, he will workout everything for your good.
It's just a matter of time.
It's just a matter of trustingwhat else he might be doing
behind the scenes of what seemslike failure to you, but really
isn't shift your focus.
The next time you feel like youfailed at something within your
calling or something isn'tworking and you just can't get
it right and what is wrong withthis and what is wrong with me,

(24:09):
the next time those thoughts aretriggered, genuinely mentally
shift to, you know what, I'mobeying God.
That is all that matters.
I'm obeying God.
He will work it out for me.
I'm gonna keep going.
I'm gonna keep trying.
I'm gonna keep testing.
I'm gonna keep putting ineffort.
I'm gonna rest in between.
I'm gonna prioritize God aboveit all, and I'm just gonna trust
him with this thing.

(24:29):
Easier said than done, I know,but a lot of things are really
just about changing ourperspective.
Second thing that I'll say, andthis has been one of my favorite
phrases to tell myself lately,let God.
Be good enough for you.
When we are so weighed down bywhat feels like a failure
surface level, that's what wetell ourselves, that it's a

(24:50):
failure.
But deep down it's the simplefact that what we did, what
we're doing, this life, thisseason, it's not good enough.
What does it look like for Godto be all the enough that you
need?
Can God be good enough for you?
Is God good enough for you?
To the point where no matterwhat you're going through, what
season you're in, the failures,the successes, and everything in

(25:13):
between, God is good enough foryou to the point where you, my
friend, are steady.
You are content.
You might have moments whereyou're feeling really low, but
you've built up the consistencyto be content because you trust
him.
God is good enough for you.
This is something I'm working ondaily and it's hard, but when
you really put that into yourlife, man, it can change you for

(25:38):
the better.
It can change.
Your ability to be peaceful,your ability to remain
confident, your ability to notworry about anything, including
the timing of things let God begood enough.
Last thing that I'll say.
When you take the time toreflect on the successes that
God is delivering to you, that'sjust coming in a smaller or a

(26:00):
different package, Remember Ijust talked about that.
When you take the time toreflect on what those other
successes could be, rather thankeeping your eye on the big
failure, what those othersmaller successes could be
around it, I want you to look atthose things and not just be
aware of them and be like, oh,cool, okay.
I succeeded in these areas.
I want you to finish it out.

(26:22):
The areas that you do see Aregrowing, you pursue it, finish
it out.
For example, if I know that ifthe launch that I've been trying
was failing, but yet I succeededin building the skillset of
having a visual eye or a design,things like that, then let me
continue building on thatskillset.
Let me put it to use in otherareas of my business and other

(26:44):
areas of my life.
And watch the outcome of it onthe other end.
Going back to my emotionalintelligence story, if the
little success that I've seen isme simply being aware of
triggers of when my emotions areat an all time high.
Let me not just be like, oh,that's cool.
I've succeeded in being aware ofthese things.

(27:05):
no, let me pursue it.
Let me progress in that specificthing.
What does that look like for meto become an intelligent in my
awareness?
Just some thoughts, because Ithink when we pivot in that way.
We start to find joy in thethings that actually are working
by not just letting them sitthere but pursuing them and

(27:26):
progressing them further.
And in that way it actually doesprogress.
Your overarching big picturevision of your calling to the
point where, where you feel likeyou failed, eventually you will
succeed because you focused onthese little things that were
working and you doubled downjust something to think about my
friend.
You're not a failure.
I know it feels like it.
I understand.
I have been there many times.

(27:47):
You're not a failure.
God is doing something behindthe scenes in what feels like a
failure to you as you pursueyour God-given calling.
But to God, this is success.
He is working all thingstogether for your good.
pay attention to the littlethings, the uncommon things.
Do the work in changing yourperspective.

(28:07):
You do that, your life willchange.
Your joy as you continuepursuing your calling will
change.
I truly believe that Thanks somuch for tuning in, friend.
I hope that you enjoyed thisepisode, and if you did, enjoy
it.
Feel free to forward it over toa friend, email it, text it if
you feel like this could be theuplifting message that they
could use in their life righthere, right now.

(28:30):
We'll see you next week.
Enjoy the rest of your day.