May 15, 2025 • 23 mins
How Faith and God's Will
Transformed Her Life
In this episode, Kylie shares her incredible story of how loss became the catalyst for her spiritual transformation from lukewarm to on fire for Jesus. Kylie’s journey is one of resilience, reflection, and renewal, showcasing the profound impact of listening to God’s will to find her true calling.
Episode Highlights:
· The Catalyst: Learn how life-changing losses prompted Kylie to seek God, resulting in a new sense of purpose.
· Starting Anew: Discover how Kylie felt called to reflect on painful moments and embrace the opportunity to begin afresh.
· Confronting the Past: Hear about the challenges Kylie faced in addressing grief and regret, and how she turned them into stepping stones toward growth.
· Transformation Through Faith: Explore embracing prayer became the foundation of Kylie’s healing and self-discovery.
· New Opportunities: Find out how Kylie uncovered hidden talents and created opportunities that enriched her life.
Why You Should Listen:
If you’ve experienced loss in your life, Kylie’s story will serve as an example of the transformative power of faith, reflection, and resilience. Whether you’re facing your own challenges or seeking inspiration to embrace change, this episode will leave you with hope, encouragement, and actionable insights on turning adversity into opportunity.
Connect With Us:
If Kylie’s story resonates with you, please leave a review and share this episode with someone who might need a dose of inspiration today. Don’t forget to subscribe and help us move more hearts toward Jesus!
Our goal with this episode is to move at least one heart toward God -- is it yours? Let us know! And if you'd like to get involved by becoming a storyteller or donating to the movement, please visit:
Web: godisgoodpodcast.com
Social: www.facebook.com/groups/godisgoodpodcast/
Some of our episodes mention the ACTS Retreat, which is an evangelization retreat from ACTS Missions in San Antonio, TX: www.actsmissions.org.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Carol (00:08):
Welcome to the God is Good Podcast, where we share
stories of everyday people whohave reignited their faith in
Jesus and experienced remarkablelife transformations.
My name is Carol O'Brien and I'myour host for this podcast.
I'd like to take a moment to saythank you to our supporters,
both financial and those wholike and subscribe to our
(00:30):
podcast.
It really does help support usand make this podcast possible,
so thank you so much.
"The Lord is near.
Have no anxiety at all, but ineverything by prayer and
petition with Thanksgiving.
Make your request known to God,then the peace of God that
(00:50):
surpasses all understanding willguard your hearts and minds in
Christ Jesus." Philippians fourverses five through seven.
Good morning friends in Christ.;I'm excited to introduce you to
our guest, Kylie.
After spending 13 years ineducation, serving in various
roles, including a teacher and acoach, Kylie had an experience
(01:13):
that resulted in a dramatictransformation.
She realized God was calling herto start anew.
The journey would require her toreflect on painful moments and
guilt from the past and makechanges in the way she was
living.
But the process led toself-discovery and spiritual
growth that opened up excitingnew opportunities.
(01:35):
Kylie's story makes me reflecton moments in my own past,
especially when I had to rely onthat same scripture, Philippians
four verses five through seven.
I believe that at times we haveevents in our lives that we know
are going to transform us.
Other times, there may be smallmoments, those times when we
(01:55):
think we have enough time tomake changes if needed, those
small moments that end up havingdramatic impacts on our lives.
But before we get too far downthat road, let me tell you a
little bit about Kylie.
She counts her family, herfaith, and the work God drew her
to as her blessings.
She is passionate about bringingsouls to Jesus through prayer.
(02:18):
To do this, she's highly activein live speaking engagements,
coaching, spiritual directing,podcasting, and teaching.
As busy as she is, sheprioritizes time with her loving
and supportive family.
But enough for me, let's hearfrom Kylie.
Hi, Kylie.
Welcome to the podcast.
Kylie (02:40):
Carol.
Thank you so much for having me.
This is truly a blessing, andyour ministry is beautiful.
Carol (02:46):
Thank you! So let's get right to it.
Can you tell us about thespiritual foundation from your
youth?
Did you have a strongfaith-filled background?
Kylie (02:55):
Absolutely.
I grew up in the CatholicChurch.
My mom was a Catholic.
My dad was not, but we went toMass every week.
I would say I had a relationshipwith God.
I remember even in middle schooland high school reading my
Bible, but my prayer, I wouldn'tcall it deep, right?
It wasn't that I didn't haveconversation with God, but I
(03:15):
didn't know the depth andbreadth and beauty of what a
relationship with God couldreally look like.
And through my own fault, Ireally hindered that
relationship.
Had in my very late teens, earlytwenties let that sin creep in
and then came the shame and theexcuses to keep sinning.
And we know that when thathappens, we really block the
(03:37):
voice of God.
We can't hear what he's askingus because we're so focused on
us.
I never left the church.
I was still going to mass.
I still said some prayers, butGod was not my priority.
Carol (03:51):
You were lukewarm, right?
Kylie (03:52):
Yes.
Carol (03:53):
So when I hear someone who has accomplished as much as
you have in life, I always thinkabout striving and what we're
actually striving for.
If you've listened to thepodcast, you've probably heard
me talk about how we try to fillGod-sized holes with everything,
but God.
Do you feel like you werestriving for something to
achieve that wasn't necessarilyrelated to your love of God?
Kylie (04:16):
Yeah, I think it was really rooted back in a wound
that came up, and I didn't evenrealize this.
I knew that it had something todo with my family life.
There was a situation with myparents where I was probably
about 12 or 13, and they got inan argument over money.
And it had nothing to do withme, but I was like that final
(04:37):
linchpin that caused the fightbecause the money was about me
wanting to go out for clubvolleyball.
And it wasn't a lot of money.
It was just the financial stressthat they were under at that
point in time.
And it created this lie in mymind that I'm a burden.
That then carried forward whereI need to earn my way.
My parents never really putpressure on me to achieve.
(05:01):
It was very self-induced, Iwould say, but being the fourth
child out of five and seeing thepain that my mother went through
with my much older siblings whenthey weren't always living in
their faith.
It rooted something into me of Ineed to do better.
I want to do better.
I think there was always thisdeep seated desire to do
(05:24):
something great.
I was one of those people whowas really good at a lot of
things, but I never felt like Iwas great at any one thing.
And I went to a very smallpublic school, so I was involved
in all the activities, everysport, every club.
I did them all.
And my parents actuallyencouraged me to do less.
It was the pride creeping in,but I created a habit of
(05:46):
busyness that carried with meand that became my idol.
And busyness is a way that wedistract ourselves from what
we're really feeling.
But again, I didn't know that atthe time.
Carol (05:57):
Oh, that's such a great insight, that busyness is a way
that we distract ourselves fromwhat we're feeling.
Let's turn now to talk aboutyour relationship with God.
Was it ever shaky or distant?
Kylie (06:09):
I would definitely say it was shaky and distant, probably
from about 17 to 22.
Again, it was never that it wasnon existent, but God was
definitely not close.
I was not listening for him.
I wasn't even really trying tolisten to him consistently.
It wasn't ever that he wasn'tthere, but I wasn't walking
closely with him.
(06:29):
We know he never leaves.
He's always striving after us.
He's the initiator.
But I wasn't responding to himinitiating that relationship.
Carol (06:36):
Did you know that you were supposed to have a
relationship with Jesus?
Sometimes God can seem so farout there and we don't even
realize that a relationship isthere waiting for us.
Kylie (06:48):
I feel like I knew, but I didn't know the fullness of how
beautiful it would be.
I don't think we can fully knowthat until we just seek it and
he responds in that way.
So I would say I knew it wasthere.
I knew it was available.
But I was running.
Again, running back into thebusyness, probably because I
(07:11):
didn't wanna face what he had tosay to me, and I didn't
understand who he was.
I think that's an even biggerpart of it.
I didn't understand that he wasa loving God.
So we know that the image thatwe see of God is often related
to our relationship with ourparents.
Carol (07:28):
Okay, let's talk about your relationship with your
parents then, and how thatcaused you to see your
relationship with God.
Kylie (07:35):
So my dad was definitely more challenging to get along
with.
My dad is what we would call acholeric temperament, so quick
to anger.
He could be this most patient,gentle, loving person, but then
flip a switch and be yelling ina matter of seconds.
And I know that that was hardfor him.
(07:55):
He didn't like to be like that.
He was a prayerful person.
He, I think, always wanted to dowhat the Lord willed.
He was also brutally honest.
It's a good thing.
I can look back now and see howbeautiful that is, but sometimes
he just didn't have the empathythat my mother had or the
sympathy that my mother had.
(08:16):
Whereas she was very patient andgentle, sometimes he was more
quick to just tell you how itis.
Carol (08:23):
And so is that how you saw God, someone who is going to
be quick to anger?
Kylie (08:27):
Looking back, I can realize that that was the image
of God that I had, that he wasgonna be angry with me.
And so not being able to go tohim.
And then again, my pride, notbeing able to be vulnerable with
the Lord and say, these are thethings that I have done, and
trusting that he was gonna stilllove me in that.
Carol (08:47):
So your relationship with your dad really had a profound
impact on the way that you sawGod.
Now, what about the relationshipwith your mom?
How did that impact you?
Kylie (08:58):
My mom was the exact opposite.
She also a striver.
She really was a perfectionistin certain things that she would
work on, but she was the mostgentle and patient person.
She was very slow in terms ofreaction time.
So a beautiful balance for mydad.
(09:19):
And we had a great relationship.
I feel like she was someone Icould talk to about most things
and we could spend timetogether.
She helped me to learn to bemore patient with my dad and to
love him as he was.
But with mothers, I will say,and this is part of my story,
(09:41):
mothers who are always there forus and always supportive and
always patient often get ourworst because we know that they
will always be there.
And we know that they will bepatient and they will be kind,
and they will be loving nomatter how we treat them.
So I would say she got the bruntof my worst sometimes because
all of the frustrations thatmaybe didn't come out when I was
(10:04):
at school, because again, that'simage that I was portraying,
that I had it all together allthe time, and I would feel like
I had it together.
But when I got home and it allfell apart, she was the person
who would bear the brunt of thatstress.
Carol (10:19):
As both of us are moms, I know we can relate to the other
side of that situation.
So let's get a little deeperinto your story.
I know that you have faced acouple of losses in your life.
Can you start with the loss ofyour mom?
Kylie (10:33):
Thanksgiving break, I was home and I told you sometimes we
treat the people closest to usthe worst.
Preparing for family gettogethers, in my mind, I had
this lie that it's alwaysstressful because of the
cleaning and the chaos.
So, my mom and I had beenpreparing to have everyone over
(10:55):
to my parents' house.
We got into a discussion in thekitchen.
It was, again, me, quick toanger.
I didn't feel like baking thecookies.
The brown sugar was lumpy.
The bowls weren't where theyused to be.
It was all of these things.
If you've ever watched a teenagegirl in conversation with her
mother when they're not at theirbest, you know what this is
(11:17):
like, even though I was 22, itwas still the same situation.
Normally I would've justseparated myself, went up to my
room, something like that, justseparated myself from the
situation.
But on that particular day, Ididn't.
This was the Saturday afterThanksgiving, so the end of
November, and it got to a pointwhere I had just been shoving
(11:39):
down all the stress from my ownjob and that chaos, and it kind
of erupted in this moment.
And I said, you know what?
I'm not making your day anybetter.
This is not making my day anybetter.
I do not need this.
I'm going to separate myself.
My mom thought I'd do what Inormally do and go to my room
and just cool off and come backdown.
But I didn't.
I actually left that day and soI drove home and that was the
(12:03):
last time I ever saw my mom wasthat day.
So we can live our whole life.
And do good things.
But that one day I, not knowinghow to manage my emotions, not
recognizing all of these thingsthat had been building up and
not taking care of them, Ididn't say goodbye.
I didn't say, I love you.
I didn't hug her, and that wasthe last time that I ever saw
(12:25):
her.
Two weeks later, she passedaway.
Carol (12:29):
These are those moments that we talked about in the
beginning.
Things that can seem actuallyminor or trivial, end up having
a huge dramatic impact on ourlives.
As you said you didn't see heragain, how did you find out
about your mom's passing?
Kylie (12:44):
I got a phone call from my sister saying that my mom had
been taken by life flight.
And I started driving home.
It was a two and a half hourdrive home, and I just knew that
I wasn't going to see her again.
She had woken up that morningand passed from a pulmonary
embolism, so essentially a bloodclot.
It was very, very sudden.
(13:06):
We think we have all this time.
And I think looking back on thatsituation, it's just a reminder.
We know not the day nor thehour.
Our life here is limited onEarth, and so we need to be
mindful again, that living inthe present of every single day
and recognizing where God is inthose moments and what he's
asking us to do and living inhis will.
(13:29):
The second I got to thehospital, the day that she
passed, I remember the firstthing my dad said to me was,"mom
didn't make it." And then hefollowed and said,"I know you're
gonna beat yourself up for therest of your life, but I want
you to know that she loved you."And I do know that and I think
that's why I can have peaceabout what happened and I can
talk about it is because I doknow how much she loved me and
(13:52):
being a mother myself, all thetiffs I have with my own
daughter,'cause we're sosimilar.
I know through it all, I knowhow much she loves me and I know
how much I love her even when wearen't at our best around one
another.
Carol (14:04):
I am so glad that you have peace about it because as
we know, God teaches us thingsthrough our sufferings.
So you had a very sudden loss,and then more recently you've
lost your father.
Can you tell us about this?
Kylie (14:17):
Yes.
It was shortly after we had gotback from a beautiful family
cruise.
My brother got married.
It was this wonderful familytime.
My dad loved to travel, so hewas actually just traveling
around the country in his vanand noticed that he was having
some issues with foods andthings like that.
Came back, got diagnosed.
He had stage four colon cancer.
(14:38):
It was about a week before thewhole country really shut down
that we found out that my dadhad cancer.
We knew that colon cancer was onhis side of the family.
That's actually how he lost hisdad, and then everything shut
down.
So it was incredibly stressful.
I would say that is one of themost high stress times I've ever
had in my life.
I had two young children athome.
(14:59):
We were being asked to teachonline.
I remember being on a Zoom calland it was like, I don't
remember the exact ages of mykids, but like my 4-year-old was
feeding my 1-year-oldmarshmallows to try to keep'em
quiet and one fell off thechair, and I remember sitting
there in this Zoom meetingexhausted because I was watching
my kids during the day.
(15:20):
I was making videos at nightafter they went to bed so I
could post them for my students.
And in the midst of all this,trying to find time to be with
my dad, but also because ofCOVID, him not really wanting a
lot of people around, not alwayswanting all the grandkids
around, and so it was really,really hard.
(15:42):
It was a point where I had tolean on my faith.
Also a point where it was hardto find that quiet alone time
with God because everyone wasinside.
We were all in the sameenvironment and with little
children, that's not alwayseasy.
Carol (15:59):
So what happened after your father died?
How did your life change?
Kylie (16:03):
When my dad died his death was much slower.
We had about a year with himafter his diagnosis.
And I remember after he died onemorning, waking up and feeling
sad, which is normal.
But after my dad died, I wasreally starting to more fully
trust in the Lord.
Just really feeling like theLord was saying, You have no
(16:24):
father but me.
And Mary was saying, you know,you have no mother but me.
And not that my earthly parentsaren't still there and aren't
still very much a part of me,but it was like I could just
lean more fully into them.
I could give them all of me, andthat comfort, that safe place
really is there.
I found that in the Lord so muchmore so I think than if I hadn't
(16:47):
lost my parents.
And I would say a big momentcame when I went on a silent
retreat and could just embracethis truth that God was calling
me out of teaching, to leavebehind coaching, leave behind
this identity in coaching sportsand being a classroom teacher.
And to step into whatever it wasHe wanted.
(17:07):
So that's really when I embracedCatholic coaching and I started
the podcast and daily mentalprayer in the morning.
I feel like the flame, like ifit had a knob, has just slowly
been turning up and up and up,and I do feel like I'm on fire
from my faith right now, butit's still growing.
Carol (17:25):
I love that your transformation from lukewarm to
on fire includes both big eventsand some nudgings from God to
make changes in your life.
How would you describe yourtransformation?
Kylie (17:37):
I think that there is a sense of constant conversion, so
we can look back and see all ofthese beautiful gems that the
Lord placed in our life.
We don't see them in the moment.
We really have to look back, butthis was a transformative time
for me.
Even though I had been pursuingGod for many years, it made this
(17:57):
giant uptick.
I think there was a big shiftwhen my mother died.
There was a big shift when Ireally felt like the Lord told
me, you're not going to teachanymore.
But I was scared because Ididn't know what that meant.
What am I supposed to do then,Lord?
Because I don't know what elseI'm good at.
I don't know what else I'mcalled to do, or how we're gonna
(18:17):
take care of our family." It ledeventually to me pursuing a
Master's in ministry, eventhough I didn't know what I was
gonna do with it.
It led to Catholic coaching.
It led to me getting a spiritualdirection certification that I
will finish here shortly.
Carol (18:35):
Speaking of your Catholic coaching, can you explain what
that is?
What is it that you do, and whatis God calling you to do?
Kylie (18:43):
I feel like my God-given mission is to bring souls to
Christ through prayer.
In a nutshell, my work ishelping women declutter their
minds so they can hear the voiceof God.
Venerable Fulton Sheen has thisbeautiful quote that's
attributed to him that says,"anxiety increases in direct
ratio and proportion as mandeparts from God." And I think
(19:04):
that really encompasses the workthat I do.
As women we're naturally drivenand we live in a culture that
reinforces this message toachieve and succeed.
And.
We have this beautifulcombination of gifts to drive
and achieve, but it's also alittle bit treacherous because
(19:27):
on one hand it allows us toaccomplish beautiful things for
the Lord, but when our lives arenot properly ordered, when we
are constantly striving to proveour worth, and we place our
identity in that praise or thatperfection or that productivity,
we lose sight of our identity inChrist.
This truly is a calling that theLord has placed on my heart, and
(19:47):
I work with women bothone-on-one and in group
settings, through workshops,speaking events, and my podcast
called Persistence and Prayer.
Carol (19:57):
And who would you say your ideal client is?
And if somebody wants to workwith you, how can they reach
you?
Kylie (20:03):
The perfect person to come to me is someone who wants
to deepen their relationshipwith God.
Who wants to order their life ina way that puts Him first.
It doesn't mean that otherthings aren't important.
It doesn't mean that thosedesires on their heart aren't
from God, but who just wants tohave that proper order.
A lot of what I do is help womento understand the foundation of
(20:27):
their temperaments, their statein life so that they can love
where they are while also havingthat intimate relationship with
God because it is possible tohave both.
We establish a plan of life thatfits their needs and help them
make it a habit.
So anyone who wants to overcomeanxiety and overwhelm by
(20:50):
developing a better relationshipwith God, I would say is the
person to come to me.
And my website is kylie mhein.com.
That's kyliemhein.com.
I'm on Instagram at Kylie m Heinand you can find me on my
podcast, Persistence in Prayer.
Carol (21:12):
Now's a good time to reread your favorite scripture,
which of course is the one weopened with Philippians four,
verses five through seven.
The Lord is near have no anxietyat all, but in everything by
prayer and petition.
With Thanksgiving, make yourrequest known to God.
Then the peace of God thatsurpasses all understanding will
(21:33):
guard your hearts and minds inJesus.
Why is this your favoritescripture, Kylie?
Kylie (21:38):
It says God is near.
And I think if we can rememberthat through the highs and the
lows and everything else, thatGod is near, God is in the
present, he never leaves us.
Sometimes he doesn't feel close,but it doesn't mean that he's
not there.
He's always there.
I think that this verse just hasso many beautiful aspects of it
(21:59):
in such a short couple ofsentences that can really just
carry us throughout our day.
Carol (22:06):
I agree.
It's one of my favoritescriptures too.
Thank you so much, Kylie.
I think your story is reallypowerful because I know we all
have moments in our lives thatwe wish we could have done
something different.
But I think God uses thosemoments, even those ones that we
regret, to help bring us closerto him.
Thank you for sharing.
I know that your story is goingto touch hearts and bring them
(22:29):
closer to Jesus.
Kylie (22:31):
Thank you so much, Carol.
Carol (22:32):
And thank you listeners, for spending time with us.
It would mean the world to me ifyou would like or subscribe to
the podcast wherever you listento it.
It really will help us bringmore hearts to Jesus.
Until next time, friends,remember God is good.
Welcome to the God is Good Podcast, where we share
stories of everyday people whohave reignited their faith in
Jesus and experienced remarkablelife transformations.
My name is Carol O'Brien and I'myour host for this podcast.
I'd like to take a moment to saythank you to our supporters,
both financial and those wholike and subscribe to our
(00:30):
podcast.
It really does help support usand make this podcast possible,
so thank you so much.
"The Lord is near.
Have no anxiety at all, but ineverything by prayer and
petition with Thanksgiving.
Make your request known to God,then the peace of God that
(00:50):
surpasses all understanding willguard your hearts and minds in
Christ Jesus." Philippians fourverses five through seven.
Good morning friends in Christ.;I'm excited to introduce you to
our guest, Kylie.
After spending 13 years ineducation, serving in various
roles, including a teacher and acoach, Kylie had an experience
(01:13):
that resulted in a dramatictransformation.
She realized God was calling herto start anew.
The journey would require her toreflect on painful moments and
guilt from the past and makechanges in the way she was
living.
But the process led toself-discovery and spiritual
growth that opened up excitingnew opportunities.
(01:35):
Kylie's story makes me reflecton moments in my own past,
especially when I had to rely onthat same scripture, Philippians
four verses five through seven.
I believe that at times we haveevents in our lives that we know
are going to transform us.
Other times, there may be smallmoments, those times when we
(01:55):
think we have enough time tomake changes if needed, those
small moments that end up havingdramatic impacts on our lives.
But before we get too far downthat road, let me tell you a
little bit about Kylie.
She counts her family, herfaith, and the work God drew her
to as her blessings.
She is passionate about bringingsouls to Jesus through prayer.
(02:18):
To do this, she's highly activein live speaking engagements,
coaching, spiritual directing,podcasting, and teaching.
As busy as she is, sheprioritizes time with her loving
and supportive family.
But enough for me, let's hearfrom Kylie.
Hi, Kylie.
Welcome to the podcast.
Kylie (02:40):
Carol.
Thank you so much for having me.
This is truly a blessing, andyour ministry is beautiful.
Carol (02:46):
Thank you! So let's get right to it.
Can you tell us about thespiritual foundation from your
youth?
Did you have a strongfaith-filled background?
Kylie (02:55):
Absolutely.
I grew up in the CatholicChurch.
My mom was a Catholic.
My dad was not, but we went toMass every week.
I would say I had a relationshipwith God.
I remember even in middle schooland high school reading my
Bible, but my prayer, I wouldn'tcall it deep, right?
It wasn't that I didn't haveconversation with God, but I
(03:15):
didn't know the depth andbreadth and beauty of what a
relationship with God couldreally look like.
And through my own fault, Ireally hindered that
relationship.
Had in my very late teens, earlytwenties let that sin creep in
and then came the shame and theexcuses to keep sinning.
And we know that when thathappens, we really block the
(03:37):
voice of God.
We can't hear what he's askingus because we're so focused on
us.
I never left the church.
I was still going to mass.
I still said some prayers, butGod was not my priority.
Carol (03:51):
You were lukewarm, right?
Kylie (03:52):
Yes.
Carol (03:53):
So when I hear someone who has accomplished as much as
you have in life, I always thinkabout striving and what we're
actually striving for.
If you've listened to thepodcast, you've probably heard
me talk about how we try to fillGod-sized holes with everything,
but God.
Do you feel like you werestriving for something to
achieve that wasn't necessarilyrelated to your love of God?
Kylie (04:16):
Yeah, I think it was really rooted back in a wound
that came up, and I didn't evenrealize this.
I knew that it had something todo with my family life.
There was a situation with myparents where I was probably
about 12 or 13, and they got inan argument over money.
And it had nothing to do withme, but I was like that final
(04:37):
linchpin that caused the fightbecause the money was about me
wanting to go out for clubvolleyball.
And it wasn't a lot of money.
It was just the financial stressthat they were under at that
point in time.
And it created this lie in mymind that I'm a burden.
That then carried forward whereI need to earn my way.
My parents never really putpressure on me to achieve.
(05:01):
It was very self-induced, Iwould say, but being the fourth
child out of five and seeing thepain that my mother went through
with my much older siblings whenthey weren't always living in
their faith.
It rooted something into me of Ineed to do better.
I want to do better.
I think there was always thisdeep seated desire to do
(05:24):
something great.
I was one of those people whowas really good at a lot of
things, but I never felt like Iwas great at any one thing.
And I went to a very smallpublic school, so I was involved
in all the activities, everysport, every club.
I did them all.
And my parents actuallyencouraged me to do less.
It was the pride creeping in,but I created a habit of
(05:46):
busyness that carried with meand that became my idol.
And busyness is a way that wedistract ourselves from what
we're really feeling.
But again, I didn't know that atthe time.
Carol (05:57):
Oh, that's such a great insight, that busyness is a way
that we distract ourselves fromwhat we're feeling.
Let's turn now to talk aboutyour relationship with God.
Was it ever shaky or distant?
Kylie (06:09):
I would definitely say it was shaky and distant, probably
from about 17 to 22.
Again, it was never that it wasnon existent, but God was
definitely not close.
I was not listening for him.
I wasn't even really trying tolisten to him consistently.
It wasn't ever that he wasn'tthere, but I wasn't walking
closely with him.
(06:29):
We know he never leaves.
He's always striving after us.
He's the initiator.
But I wasn't responding to himinitiating that relationship.
Carol (06:36):
Did you know that you were supposed to have a
relationship with Jesus?
Sometimes God can seem so farout there and we don't even
realize that a relationship isthere waiting for us.
Kylie (06:48):
I feel like I knew, but I didn't know the fullness of how
beautiful it would be.
I don't think we can fully knowthat until we just seek it and
he responds in that way.
So I would say I knew it wasthere.
I knew it was available.
But I was running.
Again, running back into thebusyness, probably because I
(07:11):
didn't wanna face what he had tosay to me, and I didn't
understand who he was.
I think that's an even biggerpart of it.
I didn't understand that he wasa loving God.
So we know that the image thatwe see of God is often related
to our relationship with ourparents.
Carol (07:28):
Okay, let's talk about your relationship with your
parents then, and how thatcaused you to see your
relationship with God.
Kylie (07:35):
So my dad was definitely more challenging to get along
with.
My dad is what we would call acholeric temperament, so quick
to anger.
He could be this most patient,gentle, loving person, but then
flip a switch and be yelling ina matter of seconds.
And I know that that was hardfor him.
(07:55):
He didn't like to be like that.
He was a prayerful person.
He, I think, always wanted to dowhat the Lord willed.
He was also brutally honest.
It's a good thing.
I can look back now and see howbeautiful that is, but sometimes
he just didn't have the empathythat my mother had or the
sympathy that my mother had.
(08:16):
Whereas she was very patient andgentle, sometimes he was more
quick to just tell you how itis.
Carol (08:23):
And so is that how you saw God, someone who is going to
be quick to anger?
Kylie (08:27):
Looking back, I can realize that that was the image
of God that I had, that he wasgonna be angry with me.
And so not being able to go tohim.
And then again, my pride, notbeing able to be vulnerable with
the Lord and say, these are thethings that I have done, and
trusting that he was gonna stilllove me in that.
Carol (08:47):
So your relationship with your dad really had a profound
impact on the way that you sawGod.
Now, what about the relationshipwith your mom?
How did that impact you?
Kylie (08:58):
My mom was the exact opposite.
She also a striver.
She really was a perfectionistin certain things that she would
work on, but she was the mostgentle and patient person.
She was very slow in terms ofreaction time.
So a beautiful balance for mydad.
(09:19):
And we had a great relationship.
I feel like she was someone Icould talk to about most things
and we could spend timetogether.
She helped me to learn to bemore patient with my dad and to
love him as he was.
But with mothers, I will say,and this is part of my story,
(09:41):
mothers who are always there forus and always supportive and
always patient often get ourworst because we know that they
will always be there.
And we know that they will bepatient and they will be kind,
and they will be loving nomatter how we treat them.
So I would say she got the bruntof my worst sometimes because
all of the frustrations thatmaybe didn't come out when I was
(10:04):
at school, because again, that'simage that I was portraying,
that I had it all together allthe time, and I would feel like
I had it together.
But when I got home and it allfell apart, she was the person
who would bear the brunt of thatstress.
Carol (10:19):
As both of us are moms, I know we can relate to the other
side of that situation.
So let's get a little deeperinto your story.
I know that you have faced acouple of losses in your life.
Can you start with the loss ofyour mom?
Kylie (10:33):
Thanksgiving break, I was home and I told you sometimes we
treat the people closest to usthe worst.
Preparing for family gettogethers, in my mind, I had
this lie that it's alwaysstressful because of the
cleaning and the chaos.
So, my mom and I had beenpreparing to have everyone over
(10:55):
to my parents' house.
We got into a discussion in thekitchen.
It was, again, me, quick toanger.
I didn't feel like baking thecookies.
The brown sugar was lumpy.
The bowls weren't where theyused to be.
It was all of these things.
If you've ever watched a teenagegirl in conversation with her
mother when they're not at theirbest, you know what this is
(11:17):
like, even though I was 22, itwas still the same situation.
Normally I would've justseparated myself, went up to my
room, something like that, justseparated myself from the
situation.
But on that particular day, Ididn't.
This was the Saturday afterThanksgiving, so the end of
November, and it got to a pointwhere I had just been shoving
(11:39):
down all the stress from my ownjob and that chaos, and it kind
of erupted in this moment.
And I said, you know what?
I'm not making your day anybetter.
This is not making my day anybetter.
I do not need this.
I'm going to separate myself.
My mom thought I'd do what Inormally do and go to my room
and just cool off and come backdown.
But I didn't.
I actually left that day and soI drove home and that was the
(12:03):
last time I ever saw my mom wasthat day.
So we can live our whole life.
And do good things.
But that one day I, not knowinghow to manage my emotions, not
recognizing all of these thingsthat had been building up and
not taking care of them, Ididn't say goodbye.
I didn't say, I love you.
I didn't hug her, and that wasthe last time that I ever saw
(12:25):
her.
Two weeks later, she passedaway.
Carol (12:29):
These are those moments that we talked about in the
beginning.
Things that can seem actuallyminor or trivial, end up having
a huge dramatic impact on ourlives.
As you said you didn't see heragain, how did you find out
about your mom's passing?
Kylie (12:44):
I got a phone call from my sister saying that my mom had
been taken by life flight.
And I started driving home.
It was a two and a half hourdrive home, and I just knew that
I wasn't going to see her again.
She had woken up that morningand passed from a pulmonary
embolism, so essentially a bloodclot.
It was very, very sudden.
(13:06):
We think we have all this time.
And I think looking back on thatsituation, it's just a reminder.
We know not the day nor thehour.
Our life here is limited onEarth, and so we need to be
mindful again, that living inthe present of every single day
and recognizing where God is inthose moments and what he's
asking us to do and living inhis will.
(13:29):
The second I got to thehospital, the day that she
passed, I remember the firstthing my dad said to me was,"mom
didn't make it." And then hefollowed and said,"I know you're
gonna beat yourself up for therest of your life, but I want
you to know that she loved you."And I do know that and I think
that's why I can have peaceabout what happened and I can
talk about it is because I doknow how much she loved me and
(13:52):
being a mother myself, all thetiffs I have with my own
daughter,'cause we're sosimilar.
I know through it all, I knowhow much she loves me and I know
how much I love her even when wearen't at our best around one
another.
Carol (14:04):
I am so glad that you have peace about it because as
we know, God teaches us thingsthrough our sufferings.
So you had a very sudden loss,and then more recently you've
lost your father.
Can you tell us about this?
Kylie (14:17):
Yes.
It was shortly after we had gotback from a beautiful family
cruise.
My brother got married.
It was this wonderful familytime.
My dad loved to travel, so hewas actually just traveling
around the country in his vanand noticed that he was having
some issues with foods andthings like that.
Came back, got diagnosed.
He had stage four colon cancer.
(14:38):
It was about a week before thewhole country really shut down
that we found out that my dadhad cancer.
We knew that colon cancer was onhis side of the family.
That's actually how he lost hisdad, and then everything shut
down.
So it was incredibly stressful.
I would say that is one of themost high stress times I've ever
had in my life.
I had two young children athome.
(14:59):
We were being asked to teachonline.
I remember being on a Zoom calland it was like, I don't
remember the exact ages of mykids, but like my 4-year-old was
feeding my 1-year-oldmarshmallows to try to keep'em
quiet and one fell off thechair, and I remember sitting
there in this Zoom meetingexhausted because I was watching
my kids during the day.
(15:20):
I was making videos at nightafter they went to bed so I
could post them for my students.
And in the midst of all this,trying to find time to be with
my dad, but also because ofCOVID, him not really wanting a
lot of people around, not alwayswanting all the grandkids
around, and so it was really,really hard.
(15:42):
It was a point where I had tolean on my faith.
Also a point where it was hardto find that quiet alone time
with God because everyone wasinside.
We were all in the sameenvironment and with little
children, that's not alwayseasy.
Carol (15:59):
So what happened after your father died?
How did your life change?
Kylie (16:03):
When my dad died his death was much slower.
We had about a year with himafter his diagnosis.
And I remember after he died onemorning, waking up and feeling
sad, which is normal.
But after my dad died, I wasreally starting to more fully
trust in the Lord.
Just really feeling like theLord was saying, You have no
(16:24):
father but me.
And Mary was saying, you know,you have no mother but me.
And not that my earthly parentsaren't still there and aren't
still very much a part of me,but it was like I could just
lean more fully into them.
I could give them all of me, andthat comfort, that safe place
really is there.
I found that in the Lord so muchmore so I think than if I hadn't
(16:47):
lost my parents.
And I would say a big momentcame when I went on a silent
retreat and could just embracethis truth that God was calling
me out of teaching, to leavebehind coaching, leave behind
this identity in coaching sportsand being a classroom teacher.
And to step into whatever it wasHe wanted.
(17:07):
So that's really when I embracedCatholic coaching and I started
the podcast and daily mentalprayer in the morning.
I feel like the flame, like ifit had a knob, has just slowly
been turning up and up and up,and I do feel like I'm on fire
from my faith right now, butit's still growing.
Carol (17:25):
I love that your transformation from lukewarm to
on fire includes both big eventsand some nudgings from God to
make changes in your life.
How would you describe yourtransformation?
Kylie (17:37):
I think that there is a sense of constant conversion, so
we can look back and see all ofthese beautiful gems that the
Lord placed in our life.
We don't see them in the moment.
We really have to look back, butthis was a transformative time
for me.
Even though I had been pursuingGod for many years, it made this
(17:57):
giant uptick.
I think there was a big shiftwhen my mother died.
There was a big shift when Ireally felt like the Lord told
me, you're not going to teachanymore.
But I was scared because Ididn't know what that meant.
What am I supposed to do then,Lord?
Because I don't know what elseI'm good at.
I don't know what else I'mcalled to do, or how we're gonna
(18:17):
take care of our family." It ledeventually to me pursuing a
Master's in ministry, eventhough I didn't know what I was
gonna do with it.
It led to Catholic coaching.
It led to me getting a spiritualdirection certification that I
will finish here shortly.
Carol (18:35):
Speaking of your Catholic coaching, can you explain what
that is?
What is it that you do, and whatis God calling you to do?
Kylie (18:43):
I feel like my God-given mission is to bring souls to
Christ through prayer.
In a nutshell, my work ishelping women declutter their
minds so they can hear the voiceof God.
Venerable Fulton Sheen has thisbeautiful quote that's
attributed to him that says,"anxiety increases in direct
ratio and proportion as mandeparts from God." And I think
(19:04):
that really encompasses the workthat I do.
As women we're naturally drivenand we live in a culture that
reinforces this message toachieve and succeed.
And.
We have this beautifulcombination of gifts to drive
and achieve, but it's also alittle bit treacherous because
(19:27):
on one hand it allows us toaccomplish beautiful things for
the Lord, but when our lives arenot properly ordered, when we
are constantly striving to proveour worth, and we place our
identity in that praise or thatperfection or that productivity,
we lose sight of our identity inChrist.
This truly is a calling that theLord has placed on my heart, and
(19:47):
I work with women bothone-on-one and in group
settings, through workshops,speaking events, and my podcast
called Persistence and Prayer.
Carol (19:57):
And who would you say your ideal client is?
And if somebody wants to workwith you, how can they reach
you?
Kylie (20:03):
The perfect person to come to me is someone who wants
to deepen their relationshipwith God.
Who wants to order their life ina way that puts Him first.
It doesn't mean that otherthings aren't important.
It doesn't mean that thosedesires on their heart aren't
from God, but who just wants tohave that proper order.
A lot of what I do is help womento understand the foundation of
(20:27):
their temperaments, their statein life so that they can love
where they are while also havingthat intimate relationship with
God because it is possible tohave both.
We establish a plan of life thatfits their needs and help them
make it a habit.
So anyone who wants to overcomeanxiety and overwhelm by
(20:50):
developing a better relationshipwith God, I would say is the
person to come to me.
And my website is kylie mhein.com.
That's kyliemhein.com.
I'm on Instagram at Kylie m Heinand you can find me on my
podcast, Persistence in Prayer.
Carol (21:12):
Now's a good time to reread your favorite scripture,
which of course is the one weopened with Philippians four,
verses five through seven.
The Lord is near have no anxietyat all, but in everything by
prayer and petition.
With Thanksgiving, make yourrequest known to God.
Then the peace of God thatsurpasses all understanding will
(21:33):
guard your hearts and minds inJesus.
Why is this your favoritescripture, Kylie?
Kylie (21:38):
It says God is near.
And I think if we can rememberthat through the highs and the
lows and everything else, thatGod is near, God is in the
present, he never leaves us.
Sometimes he doesn't feel close,but it doesn't mean that he's
not there.
He's always there.
I think that this verse just hasso many beautiful aspects of it
(21:59):
in such a short couple ofsentences that can really just
carry us throughout our day.
Carol (22:06):
I agree.
It's one of my favoritescriptures too.
Thank you so much, Kylie.
I think your story is reallypowerful because I know we all
have moments in our lives thatwe wish we could have done
something different.
But I think God uses thosemoments, even those ones that we
regret, to help bring us closerto him.
Thank you for sharing.
I know that your story is goingto touch hearts and bring them
(22:29):
closer to Jesus.
Kylie (22:31):
Thank you so much, Carol.
Carol (22:32):
And thank you listeners, for spending time with us.
It would mean the world to me ifyou would like or subscribe to
the podcast wherever you listento it.
It really will help us bringmore hearts to Jesus.
Until next time, friends,remember God is good.
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