EP# 368: How Early Therapy, Not Last-Resort Crisis Care, Transforms Relationships And Everyday Mental Health

What if you didn’t wait for rock bottom to ask for help? We sit down with therapist and Ascending Self owner Barrett Wilson to explore practical, compassionate ways to strengthen relationships, manage anxiety and grief, and start writing a truer version of your story today. Barrett blends evidence-based tools from the Gottman Method with Internal Family Systems to help couples and individuals communicate clearly, make repairs that last, and shift from reactive patterns to responsive choices. He also opens up about losing his father, choosing to become a client himself, and how that experience deepened his empathy and sharpened his presence in the room.

We trace Barrett’s path from adolescent development and neuroplasticity research to building an outdoor program for foster youth and leading wilderness therapy. Those roots inform his belief that healing should feel human and grounded. That’s why Ascending Self meets clients in a warm, home-based setting—porch sunshine and birdsong when the weather cooperates, a fireside office when it doesn’t—and via telehealth across East Tennessee and Western North Carolina. Along the way, we tackle stubborn myths: therapy isn’t just for emergencies, and the first therapist isn’t always the right fit. Barrett shares practical ways to find a good match and simple, daily habits that build trust and connection.

If you’re curious about relationship counseling, couples therapy, anxiety support, or grief counseling, you’ll hear clear steps you can try today: soft start-ups, repair attempts, turning toward bids, naming parts and feelings, and tracking small wins. You’ll also hear why authorship matters—how to take back the pen from old scripts and write with clarity and compassion. Ready to move from stuck to steady? Listen now, share with a friend who needs encouragement, and leave a quick review to help neighbors find the show.

Episode Transcript

SPEAKER_00 (00:03):
This is the Good Neighbor Podcast, the place
where local businesses andneighbors come together.
Here's your host, Skip Money.

SPEAKER_01 (00:15):
Well, hello, everybody, and welcome to the
Good Neighbor Podcast of EastTennessee and Western North
Carolina.
So I am very excited today tohave one special in our studio
who uh contributes to ourcommunity in a very interesting
way and a helpful way.
And I'm sure you'll be just asexcited as I am to learn all
about them and their business.

(00:36):
Because today I have thepleasure of introducing your
good neighbor, Mr.
Barrett Wilson, who is the owneroperator of Ascending Self.
Barrett, welcome to the show.
Thanks so much.
Glad to be here.
Well, like I said, we're veryexcited to have you here and uh
uh excited to learn all aboutAscending Self and what you do
there.
So if you don't mind, why don'tyou kick us off by telling us
about your company?

SPEAKER_02 (00:57):
Yeah, Ascending Self is a mental health practice
where I help folks navigate thechallenges of relationships with
partners and family, friends,coworkers, and even themselves.
I um I love helping my clientsdevelop insights and skills for
their mental and emotional lifewhile also learning to
communicate more effectively.

(01:19):
We work through hard stuff likeanxiety, depression, trauma,
shame, grief, unhealth,unhealthy habits, and things
like that.
But many of my clients find thatthey feel more confident, have
better relationships uh withothers uh after we've we've done
the work together.
I um I also use the the Gottmanmethod as one of my modalities

(01:44):
that that helps couplesunderstand what we found in the
research around relationshipsand helps them like gain the
most important skills formending relationships,
communicating effectively.
And then I couple that withinternal family systems, where
uh we we start to understand theparts uh that operate within our
mind and our brain that um thatcan be hindrances uh for the way

(02:10):
that we're connecting andcommunicating with others and
even internally, so help peoplegain clarity through that and
better understand theirprocesses so that they can uh be
more responsive than reactive tothings that are happening in
their lives.

SPEAKER_01 (02:26):
Very good.
I think we all need some ofthat.
All of us.
Um well, very interesting,Barrett.
How uh tell us about yourjourney.
How did you get started in uhthe the this industry?

SPEAKER_02 (02:39):
Well, I've been um really into psychology ever
since I was a teen.
I um I was blown away by uh aturning point in my own life
when um I had a huge change inthe perspective that I was
operating from.
And uh after taking my firstpsych class, it was no turning

(03:00):
back from there.
I I um started working in thefield um focusing on um
adolescent development andneuroplasticity when I was in
college.
And then I also helped create anoutdoor program for foster kids.
Uh, and then after that, Igraduated when I went to
graduate school, I started umworking with uh adolescents and

(03:22):
wilderness therapy settings, andthen went on to be a clinician
at a therapeutic boarding schoolas well.
It's kind of adventure-based, soit's really wonderful just uh
helping folks engage in thenatural environment and have fun
while healing.
It was really great.
From there, I was working withthe families, and after the
graduation from the program, somany families wanted uh

(03:45):
additional help.
So it was a pretty smoothtransition from working with
just the families and the teenparent relationships to also
helping clients individually andthen helping couples with their
marriages.

SPEAKER_01 (03:58):
Very cool.
I love the concept of thewilderness sessions.
That that sounds fascinating,actually.
Um absolutely, I'm sure.
Well, what are some myths ormisconceptions uh in the mental
health industry that you canthink of, Barrett?

SPEAKER_02 (04:13):
I think one of the biggest ones would be that uh
people come to get help wheneverything's collapsed.
Uh, I actually love helpingclients when they're desperately
in need, but I also wish we havegotten uh started sooner.
It's uh it's sad to see thatthere was unnecessary damage
that could have been preventedif we'd gotten in the office

(04:35):
earlier.
So I'm always encouraging folksto seek out a good therapist and
start the process as soon asthey can, also knowing that it's
never too late, but we don'twant to wait until things are
unbearable.
And then I'd say another mistakethat people make sometimes is
thinking that uh their firsttherapist will be a perfect fit.
Um, sadly, it it's usually twoor three attempts to find the

(04:58):
right one, but um I'm quite sureit's worth the effort for most.

SPEAKER_01 (05:04):
Not always a perfect fit.
Yeah.
Very good to know.
Well, I'm sure you know you putin a lot of hours doing what you
do, uh, Barrett.
Uh, when you're when you're inyour off time, if you have any,
what uh what do you like to dofor fun, kicks and giggles?

SPEAKER_02 (05:20):
I'm a big fan of uh outdoor activities.
I'm a big rock climber, but alsolove hiking and boating and
backpacking all over EastTennessee.
It's just so much adventure andbeauty surrounding us here, and
um, it's a wonderful place tolive.
I also really enjoy the livemusic in our in our area.
I appreciate how musicians canchannel their thoughts and

(05:41):
emotions onto the stage.
And I just think about how luckywe are to be surrounded by
beautiful mountains andbrilliant artists.
So those are the things I loveto do.

SPEAKER_01 (05:50):
Absolutely.
Outdoors and music, love it.
You live in a great place forit.
This is to me, yes, EastTennessee is one of the most
beautiful places on earth, noquestion.
Sure it is.
So uh let's switch gears for asecond.
Can you describe a hardship or alife challenge that you've
overcome and how it made youstronger in the end, whether
professional or personal?

SPEAKER_02 (06:10):
Yeah, I'd say uh losing my dad was uh one of my
biggest challenges.
He was uh uh my rock and aninspiration for me.
So losing him really shook me upand my family.
Um, so the way that that playedout in this work was that I
ended up taking on a role of aclient to go through uh the

(06:31):
grief of losing him.
But that was really good for mein my healing process and as a
professional.
And when I graduated therapy, Ifelt like uh I left with a
richer empathy for my clientsand just gratitude for my
father.
I was so lucky to have a goodtherapist help me through that
process.
And and I think it's been uh ahuge benefit in the work that I

(06:55):
do with my clients as well.

SPEAKER_01 (06:57):
Very good, very good.
Now, if um you could think ofone thing that you would like
our listeners and viewers toremember about ascending self uh
and and you, what would that be?

SPEAKER_02 (07:10):
Um, just the you know, I'm really passionate
about what I'm doing.
I I really think I've found mylife purpose in helping people
work through their challenges.
I think that part of part of thework is empowerment too.
Um, a lot of folks, we start outwith the stories that our
parents are kind of writing forus when we're children, as well
as the world around us.
And I love watching my clientsstart to take the the pen of

(07:33):
authorship for their own story.
And, you know, sometimes we evenend up making the mistake of
handing that pin over to otherpeople later in life or into
culture or into other uh youknow, hands that that don't
necessarily deserve it, andhelping clients uh learn how to
take that for themselves and umand uh really know their own

(07:56):
story as they're writing it umauthentically is is huge.
Um I'd say the other the otherthing about uh my practice
that's different than others isthat it's not you know held in a
strip mall or an officebuilding.
Uh I work from home and so uh weget these beautiful settings on
the back porch with the sunshineand the bird songs if the

(08:18):
weather's good.
And if it's cold daylight today,I have a fireside office so uh
we can keep warm and a settingthat feels more homey than your
typical, typical psych office.
I also offer uh telehealth forclients that can't meet in
person.
And um, I know some of the folksthat are closer to your region
where you are can can still seeme via telehealth.

(08:41):
Very cool.

SPEAKER_01 (08:42):
Yeah, very good to know.
And for those of us who, youknow, could use some mental
health help um are intrigued,like to learn more about what
you do and what your specialtiesare, um, how can they how can
they learn more?
On my websites uh send ourepisode.

SPEAKER_02 (09:12):
And then uh you can also find me on uh Google Maps
or Psychology today.

SPEAKER_01 (09:19):
Okay, could you I'm gonna ask you that one more
time.
I had a little bit of a glitchgoing on there.
Um how how can we learn more?
Thanks.

SPEAKER_02 (09:27):
Um, yeah, you can go to my website uh on ascending
self.com.
It's just the name of thepractice and oneword.com.
On there, I'll post uh freeresources and information on um
my practice as well as like howto apply some of the tools that
we'd be learning in our worktogether.
But you can also find me onGoogle Maps or Psychology Today,

(09:48):
or if you even just uh Googlesearch my name or Ascending
Self, you'll find it prettyquickly.

SPEAKER_01 (09:55):
Very good.
AscendingSelf.com.
We'll keep that in mind.
Very good.
Well uh Barrett, I can't take ittell you how much we appreciate
you taking time out of your busyschedule to uh hang out with us
and tell us all about you andAscending Self and your journey.
And we appreciate that.
Appreciate what you're doing uhfor your neighbors and and for

(10:16):
the community, and uh wish you,your family, and your practice
all the best moving forward.

SPEAKER_02 (11:13):
Are you with me?
I don't know what's okay.

SPEAKER_01 (11:18):
You know what?
We we could always edit.
Um so let's let's try again.
So uh so Barrett, but can youhear me okay?
Or you froze up again?
Are you with me?
Are we are we working?

SPEAKER_02 (11:36):
We're working now.
Sorry, man.
I feel so that's okay.
That's okay.
Is it on my end?
I hope it's not.
I don't I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 (11:41):
That was just sudden all of a sudden, but we'll let's
take it from that last questionone more time.

SPEAKER_02 (11:45):
Okay.

SPEAKER_01 (11:46):
So then we can edit all this out.

SPEAKER_02 (11:47):
Oh, one more time on uh on what um uh on the practice
on how can our listeners learnmore?
Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 (11:55):
Okay, we'll do it with okay.
So uh so Barrett, uh for thoseof our listeners, viewers that
are interested in um uh checkingyou out, learning more, that
they're in need for some mentalhealth help, uh, how can we
learn more?

SPEAKER_02 (12:09):
Well, you can find me easily on my website.
It's ascending self.com.
It's the same name as thepractice, um, just one word.com.
On there, I have uh freeresources uh for uh tools that
we use within the practice, aswell as a better understanding
of the modalities I use likeGottman.

SPEAKER_01 (12:52):
I don't know what happened again.
It doesn't want us to finish.
It doesn't, apparently.
Okay, do do this.
Take it from we were good upuntil you said we have free
resources on there, and theneverything blocked it.

SPEAKER_02 (13:05):
No audio right now.

SPEAKER_01 (13:07):
Testing one, two, three.

SPEAKER_02 (13:08):
I can't hear anything.

SPEAKER_01 (13:10):
Testing one, two, three.
Hello, hello.

SPEAKER_02 (13:14):
Uh should I re-refresh it?
I still can't hear you.

SPEAKER_01 (13:17):
Um I don't know.
Um testing one, two, three.
Can you hear me?
Can you hear me at all?

SPEAKER_02 (13:23):
Nothing, nothing for me.
Um I'll I'll refresh it.

SPEAKER_01 (13:28):
Okay.
Can you hear me now?
Yeah, I can hear you.
I don't know what's going on,Skip.

(13:49):
I don't know either, but that'sokay.
We'll we'll go for we'll try itone more time.
So okay.
So uh Barrett, for those of uswho are interested in learning
more and uh have a need uh forsome mental health help, uh, how
can how can we learn more?

SPEAKER_02 (14:04):
Uh you can uh find me on my website, ascending
self.com.
That's the same name as thepractice, just oneword.com,
ascending self.
On there, I have uh free uhtools and and information that
can help clients along the wayin the work that we do.
And you can also find me onGoogle Maps or Psychology Today,
or even just Googling uhAscending Self or my name will

(14:28):
probably uh help you find metoo.

SPEAKER_01 (14:30):
Awesome.
Well, Barrett, can't tell youhow much we appreciate you
taking time out of your busyschedule away from your clients
to tell us all about you andwhat you're doing and all the
wonderful things you're doingfor folks in the community.
And appreciate you and whatyou're doing, Skip.
Thank you.
Absolutely, and uh wish you,your family, and your clients
all the best moving forward.

(14:50):
Thanks, you too.
All right, and uh maybe we canhave you back sometime.
I'd love that.
All right, sounds great.
You have a great rest of theday.
You too.

SPEAKER_00 (15:00):
Thank you for listening to the Good Neighbor
Podcast.
To nominate your favorite localbusinesses to be featured on the
show, go to GMP Try Dash Citiesdot com.
That's GMP Try Dash Cities dotcom or call four two three seven
one nine five eight seven three.