February 27, 2024 • 13 mins
Grace often seems like a whispered secret, something that others possess but somehow eludes us in our moments of turmoil. Yet, what if I told you that grace could be your steadfast companion, an ever-present strength amidst life's twists and turns? Discover the transformative power of grace with my dear friend Ebony Gilbert, as we share our heartfelt conversation on its omnipresence in our lives. This episode is a journey into understanding how honesty, not perfection, invites grace into our daily experiences, from the holiday hustle to the quiet moments of reflection.
Ebony and I open up about the strength in vulnerability and the common misbelief that grace is a sign of weakness. We examine the paradox of needing grace when we seem to have everything under control and the profound impact of admitting our struggles. Like a dance with life itself, we discuss how to embrace change, support each other, and find resilience in flexibility and interconnectedness. Join us for an episode that promises to be a balm for the soul, offering insights on accessing grace at all times—yes, even when you're in boss mode!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to Grace Among Us, the podcast where we
unearth the many faces andplaces of grace and share
stories of the power of grace inour human lives.
Our desire is that this willinspire you to see grace in your
own life and share it withothers.
Carri Richard (00:22):
Hello, hello, my name is Carri Richard.
I am a mindset coach and I helppeople make space and enjoy the
ride, enjoy this beautiful lifethat's here for all of us.
And I am doing one of my veryfavorite things, which you guys
hear all the time, and it's totalk with my dear friend, Ebony
Gilbert, about grace.
(00:43):
So hey, hi, Ebony.
Ebony Gilbert (00:46):
Hey Carri, good day, how are you?
Carri Richard (00:49):
It is a good day.
I am great.
How are you?
Ebony Gilbert (00:55):
If you're great, I'm great.
Carri Richard (00:56):
Okay, good, sounds good.
Ebony Gilbert (00:59):
Than we're great, let's be great.
Okay, I am well, I'm very well.
Thank you for asking.
Carri Richard (01:06):
Yeah, absolutely.
We had a little chit chatbefore we get on this spot and
speak about grace and you know,one of the beautiful things
about life and one of the thingsthat is tough about life is
everything is always changing,right, (Ebony- constantly).
Yeah, and you know, I have adad who's 90 and you know, and
(01:35):
friends, myself, we're all aging.
Things are shifting, life ischanging and I don't always like
it and, based on someexperiences over the last week
or so.
T here's this concept.
If I'm, the more real I amabout the current situation,
(02:03):
whatever is going on, the moreaccess to grace I have.
Ebony Gilbert (02:13):
I could not agree with you more.
Carri Richard (02:16):
Yeah, and as we were speaking, it's like, okay,
do I, do I put on my game faceor do I ask for grace?
Ebony Gilbert (02:27):
Yeah, I'm right there with you, particularly
coming right off of theChristmas holiday, and I'm sure
you were overwhelmed, as I wasoverwhelmed and had more on our
plates than we probablybargained for.
And you know, when you sayasking for grace, sometimes it
doesn't come out in the form ofa question.
You know, sometimes for me thispast week, asking for grace was
(02:53):
saying I can't do it by myself.
It was hey, can you help me?
I might need a little help orI'm not.
When people little thing, whenpeople say how are you feeling,
how are you doing, what's goingon, I'm like "I'm having a hard
time, right now
Carri Richard (03:10):
now yeah.
Ebony Gilbert (03:11):
Just saying that opens this wide door.
It's almost like these scopingglass doors that nobody even
knew were there.
They just start to open and allof a sudden the grace comes in,
(Carri - absolutely).
Carri Richard (03:28):
As you say that, it reminds me of this idea I
hear often in different ways Idon't have to be anything more
than what I am right now toreceive grace In this moment.
In this moment, I don't have tobe honest-er or be healthier or
(03:50):
be anything or to receive allof the love and grace that's
here for me.
My humanness, my ego, pride,whatever wants to put this game
face on that.
I got it.
I got it.
But usually the more that Iwant to do that, the more I need
(04:14):
grace in that moment.
Right.
Ebony Gilbert (04:16):
Right, and who's to say, carrie?
You can't have it all togetherand be in charge of being in
control and still need graceLike.
Why are those two thingsdifferent?
Carri Richard (04:29):
I think you just ( I love it).
You've nailed it.
You've just nailed it.
I need grace all the time.
Ebony Gilbert (04:39):
All the time, even when I'm in boss mode, yeah
, even when I'm knocking it outof the park, (Carri-because I'm
not the boss anyway).
Right, I still need, you know,my guy Big G up there, to come
show up for me, because I'm notin boss mode without the big
boss showing up for me.
(04:59):
Yeah, so it's interesting themore vulnerable you are, the
stronger you are.
Yeah, yeah.
Carri Richard (05:14):
Yeah, like a blade of grass, right, it bends
in the wind.
It's flexible in the wind, likethat rigid.
You know, it doesn't work.
Ebony Gilbert (05:27):
I've never seen a blade of grass stand alone.
I've never seen one blade ofgrass ever.
You know, it's interesting.
I'm about to be cheesy here fora second.
Go with me.
Okay, I was blurring mybackground before you came on
screen and they had this option.
Can you see this background now?
Mm-hmm, they had this grassoption and I thought to myself,
(05:51):
" that's busy.
And then you get on here withthe grass reference and I'm like
, well, how could being it?
Because grace is this grass.
Yeah, and when you makeyourself vulnerable, this, this
sea of grass that never standsalone, there's never one blade
(06:13):
envelops you and all of a sudden, you're protected and you're
covered with this sense of just.
I'm a lawn freak.
You guys have heard me talkabout my grass before, so I love
the reference.
But this grass, this background, first of all, what are the
odds that I'm scrolling throughzoom backgrounds?
I've never done that in my life, ever.
Carri Richard (06:35):
It's a God.
It's a God-cide nce".
Ebony Gilbert (06:38):
And then you mentioned a blade of grass in
the middle of this conversation.
That's not even preplanned, andI remember that there's this
stupid grass background that'sreally busy and I wasn't going
to choose it.
And now here it is, and here,here, here's the here what's
coming to my mind right now.
I chose the blur because Ithought the blur was less busy
(06:58):
and it, you know it just, itjust hid my background, which is
what I was trying to do.
I was trying to hide it right,cause I'm not at home on my
vacation and I ended up usingthe thing that I thought was too
much or over the top.
In reference to what you saidabout how being vulnerable and
(07:19):
what we were talking about bybeing vulnerable, making you
more strong, because the grassspins.
All of that coming togetherduring this conversation is is
mind blowing for me right now,cause I was trying to hide, and
if I had just shown up as myauthentic self and I really
wanted to choose the grass,matter of fact, I was kind of
tickled by it.
I thought, yeah, grass, I lovegrass.
(07:40):
If I had just chosen theauthentic choice that I wanted
to begin with, it may have evensparked a different route.
We said we were supposed to saywe do, we're supposed to do,
we're here now, right, but whata real time example.
I love that.
Am I being a nerd right now?
Carri Richard (07:58):
No, you're not being a nerd, I'm totally
nerding out with you and I wantto say that sometimes the grace
is permission, right?
And I had an experience thislast week too, where you know
something, something happenedwith one of my loved ones that I
(08:18):
, I, I didn't like, I didn'tlike, and I was there for the
experience.
And you know, I wanted to scoopthis person up and I wanted to
make it okay.
I wanted to because, reallyhonestly, I was uncomfortable
that it was happening, right.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
I love.
Carri Richard (08:39):
I love this person dearly, but it also
speaks to my discomfort andattachment and wanting things to
be how they used to be, and aswe age, that doesn't always
happen.
So, and by God's grace, I wasable to just be present and
(09:00):
allow it all to happen and tofeel the feelings, and what came
to mind is just allowingeveryone the dignity of the
experience.
Ebony Gilbert (09:13):
Everybody's experience.
You get the dignity of yourexperience, yeah.
Yeah and they just see he orshe gets the dignity of their
experience.
Yes monogram, brace Grace whenit shows up for Keri Richard as
CR.
Yeah, grace when it shows upfor Ebony Gilbert has a big EG
(09:35):
on it and all those things cancoexist in the same room.
Yeah, and nobody has lackedbecause of it, you know, but you
got to open those big glassdoors of vulnerability and
authenticity to allow it to comein.
Carri Richard (09:53):
Absolutely, absolutely.
That's good, I have one morethat just came to mind.
So so I have a challenge goingon in my life right now that I
don't like, and I have beentrying to figure it out myself
and I asked someone directly forhelp, somebody very close to me
(10:18):
and they were willing to helpand they said, "you know what?
This has happened to me.
And when they said that, Ijust I'm getting (Ebony - you
didn't know that)I'm getting teary just in this
moment.
(10:39):
I have cried about it a coupleof times because, first of all,
I didn't know that, but secondof all.
What it, was that connection -like hey, I'm human too.
Like, yeah, not the only one.
It's okay, it's okay.
Ebony Gilbert (10:59):
It's okay to be scared, it's okay to say I don't
feel good about this, and youdon't have to be right either,
you can.
It's okay to be paranoidsometimes, like it's just okay,
you know?
Yeah, and it's, it's reallyjust okay.
Yeah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna geta banner on my forehead.
(11:21):
It's just okay, yeah.
Carri Richard (11:23):
Okay, it's all right, there's no need for a
game face.
Ebony Gilbert (11:30):
There isn't.
The grace is the game face.
No, no more game face.
Put on your grace face.
Your grace face says show uphow you woke up, show up with
what's in your heart.
Yeah, and it's allowed tochange throughout the day.
Carri Richard (11:48):
And that's what God works with.
God works with the real stuff.
He can't work with thefabricated stuff.
Ebony Gilbert (11:57):
Yeah yeah.
The clown face, yeah.
The masquerade face.
Yeah yeah, we're gonna practiceputting on our grace face with
ourselves, with ourselves.
It allows for everybody else inthe room to have a safe space
(12:18):
to put theirs on as well.
Yeah, yeah, it makes room.
This is powerful.
This wasn't our typical 30minute, but this powerful, a
little bit of time.
Carri Richard (12:31):
Yes, perfect timing.
I love the grass and I love you, Ebony.
Ebony Gilbert (12:41):
I love you as well, Carri, I really do, and we
will talk again soon.
Yes, until then, grace out,grace out.
Put on your grace face, amen.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Thank you so much for joining us.
If you enjoyed this episode,please let us know.
We love to hear from you andshare it with a friend.
Also, please be sure tosubscribe so you're notified
when a new episode is posted.
We hope you're leaving withanother pointer to grace, a new
perspective that will light itup in your own life.
Until next time, be well, bebold, be kinder to yourself and
(13:25):
be on the lookout.
Welcome to Grace Among Us, the podcast where we
unearth the many faces andplaces of grace and share
stories of the power of grace inour human lives.
Our desire is that this willinspire you to see grace in your
own life and share it withothers.
Carri Richard (00:22):
Hello, hello, my name is Carri Richard.
I am a mindset coach and I helppeople make space and enjoy the
ride, enjoy this beautiful lifethat's here for all of us.
And I am doing one of my veryfavorite things, which you guys
hear all the time, and it's totalk with my dear friend, Ebony
Gilbert, about grace.
(00:43):
So hey, hi, Ebony.
Ebony Gilbert (00:46):
Hey Carri, good day, how are you?
Carri Richard (00:49):
It is a good day.
I am great.
How are you?
Ebony Gilbert (00:55):
If you're great, I'm great.
Carri Richard (00:56):
Okay, good, sounds good.
Ebony Gilbert (00:59):
Than we're great, let's be great.
Okay, I am well, I'm very well.
Thank you for asking.
Carri Richard (01:06):
Yeah, absolutely.
We had a little chit chatbefore we get on this spot and
speak about grace and you know,one of the beautiful things
about life and one of the thingsthat is tough about life is
everything is always changing,right, (Ebony- constantly).
Yeah, and you know, I have adad who's 90 and you know, and
(01:35):
friends, myself, we're all aging.
Things are shifting, life ischanging and I don't always like
it and, based on someexperiences over the last week
or so.
T here's this concept.
If I'm, the more real I amabout the current situation,
(02:03):
whatever is going on, the moreaccess to grace I have.
Ebony Gilbert (02:13):
I could not agree with you more.
Carri Richard (02:16):
Yeah, and as we were speaking, it's like, okay,
do I, do I put on my game faceor do I ask for grace?
Ebony Gilbert (02:27):
Yeah, I'm right there with you, particularly
coming right off of theChristmas holiday, and I'm sure
you were overwhelmed, as I wasoverwhelmed and had more on our
plates than we probablybargained for.
And you know, when you sayasking for grace, sometimes it
doesn't come out in the form ofa question.
You know, sometimes for me thispast week, asking for grace was
(02:53):
saying I can't do it by myself.
It was hey, can you help me?
I might need a little help orI'm not.
When people little thing, whenpeople say how are you feeling,
how are you doing, what's goingon, I'm like "I'm having a hard
time, right now
Carri Richard (03:10):
now yeah.
Ebony Gilbert (03:11):
Just saying that opens this wide door.
It's almost like these scopingglass doors that nobody even
knew were there.
They just start to open and allof a sudden the grace comes in,
(Carri - absolutely).
Carri Richard (03:28):
As you say that, it reminds me of this idea I
hear often in different ways Idon't have to be anything more
than what I am right now toreceive grace In this moment.
In this moment, I don't have tobe honest-er or be healthier or
(03:50):
be anything or to receive allof the love and grace that's
here for me.
My humanness, my ego, pride,whatever wants to put this game
face on that.
I got it.
I got it.
But usually the more that Iwant to do that, the more I need
(04:14):
grace in that moment.
Right.
Ebony Gilbert (04:16):
Right, and who's to say, carrie?
You can't have it all togetherand be in charge of being in
control and still need graceLike.
Why are those two thingsdifferent?
Carri Richard (04:29):
I think you just ( I love it).
You've nailed it.
You've just nailed it.
I need grace all the time.
Ebony Gilbert (04:39):
All the time, even when I'm in boss mode, yeah
, even when I'm knocking it outof the park, (Carri-because I'm
not the boss anyway).
Right, I still need, you know,my guy Big G up there, to come
show up for me, because I'm notin boss mode without the big
boss showing up for me.
(04:59):
Yeah, so it's interesting themore vulnerable you are, the
stronger you are.
Yeah, yeah.
Carri Richard (05:14):
Yeah, like a blade of grass, right, it bends
in the wind.
It's flexible in the wind, likethat rigid.
You know, it doesn't work.
Ebony Gilbert (05:27):
I've never seen a blade of grass stand alone.
I've never seen one blade ofgrass ever.
You know, it's interesting.
I'm about to be cheesy here fora second.
Go with me.
Okay, I was blurring mybackground before you came on
screen and they had this option.
Can you see this background now?
Mm-hmm, they had this grassoption and I thought to myself,
(05:51):
" that's busy.
And then you get on here withthe grass reference and I'm like
, well, how could being it?
Because grace is this grass.
Yeah, and when you makeyourself vulnerable, this, this
sea of grass that never standsalone, there's never one blade
(06:13):
envelops you and all of a sudden, you're protected and you're
covered with this sense of just.
I'm a lawn freak.
You guys have heard me talkabout my grass before, so I love
the reference.
But this grass, this background, first of all, what are the
odds that I'm scrolling throughzoom backgrounds?
I've never done that in my life, ever.
Carri Richard (06:35):
It's a God.
It's a God-cide nce".
Ebony Gilbert (06:38):
And then you mentioned a blade of grass in
the middle of this conversation.
That's not even preplanned, andI remember that there's this
stupid grass background that'sreally busy and I wasn't going
to choose it.
And now here it is, and here,here, here's the here what's
coming to my mind right now.
I chose the blur because Ithought the blur was less busy
(06:58):
and it, you know it just, itjust hid my background, which is
what I was trying to do.
I was trying to hide it right,cause I'm not at home on my
vacation and I ended up usingthe thing that I thought was too
much or over the top.
In reference to what you saidabout how being vulnerable and
(07:19):
what we were talking about bybeing vulnerable, making you
more strong, because the grassspins.
All of that coming togetherduring this conversation is is
mind blowing for me right now,cause I was trying to hide, and
if I had just shown up as myauthentic self and I really
wanted to choose the grass,matter of fact, I was kind of
tickled by it.
I thought, yeah, grass, I lovegrass.
(07:40):
If I had just chosen theauthentic choice that I wanted
to begin with, it may have evensparked a different route.
We said we were supposed to saywe do, we're supposed to do,
we're here now, right, but whata real time example.
I love that.
Am I being a nerd right now?
Carri Richard (07:58):
No, you're not being a nerd, I'm totally
nerding out with you and I wantto say that sometimes the grace
is permission, right?
And I had an experience thislast week too, where you know
something, something happenedwith one of my loved ones that I
(08:18):
, I, I didn't like, I didn'tlike, and I was there for the
experience.
And you know, I wanted to scoopthis person up and I wanted to
make it okay.
I wanted to because, reallyhonestly, I was uncomfortable
that it was happening, right.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
I love.
Carri Richard (08:39):
I love this person dearly, but it also
speaks to my discomfort andattachment and wanting things to
be how they used to be, and aswe age, that doesn't always
happen.
So, and by God's grace, I wasable to just be present and
(09:00):
allow it all to happen and tofeel the feelings, and what came
to mind is just allowingeveryone the dignity of the
experience.
Ebony Gilbert (09:13):
Everybody's experience.
You get the dignity of yourexperience, yeah.
Yeah and they just see he orshe gets the dignity of their
experience.
Yes monogram, brace Grace whenit shows up for Keri Richard as
CR.
Yeah, grace when it shows upfor Ebony Gilbert has a big EG
(09:35):
on it and all those things cancoexist in the same room.
Yeah, and nobody has lackedbecause of it, you know, but you
got to open those big glassdoors of vulnerability and
authenticity to allow it to comein.
Carri Richard (09:53):
Absolutely, absolutely.
That's good, I have one morethat just came to mind.
So so I have a challenge goingon in my life right now that I
don't like, and I have beentrying to figure it out myself
and I asked someone directly forhelp, somebody very close to me
(10:18):
and they were willing to helpand they said, "you know what?
This has happened to me.
And when they said that, Ijust I'm getting (Ebony - you
didn't know that)I'm getting teary just in this
moment.
(10:39):
I have cried about it a coupleof times because, first of all,
I didn't know that, but secondof all.
What it, was that connection -like hey, I'm human too.
Like, yeah, not the only one.
It's okay, it's okay.
Ebony Gilbert (10:59):
It's okay to be scared, it's okay to say I don't
feel good about this, and youdon't have to be right either,
you can.
It's okay to be paranoidsometimes, like it's just okay,
you know?
Yeah, and it's, it's reallyjust okay.
Yeah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna geta banner on my forehead.
(11:21):
It's just okay, yeah.
Carri Richard (11:23):
Okay, it's all right, there's no need for a
game face.
Ebony Gilbert (11:30):
There isn't.
The grace is the game face.
No, no more game face.
Put on your grace face.
Your grace face says show uphow you woke up, show up with
what's in your heart.
Yeah, and it's allowed tochange throughout the day.
Carri Richard (11:48):
And that's what God works with.
God works with the real stuff.
He can't work with thefabricated stuff.
Ebony Gilbert (11:57):
Yeah yeah.
The clown face, yeah.
The masquerade face.
Yeah yeah, we're gonna practiceputting on our grace face with
ourselves, with ourselves.
It allows for everybody else inthe room to have a safe space
(12:18):
to put theirs on as well.
Yeah, yeah, it makes room.
This is powerful.
This wasn't our typical 30minute, but this powerful, a
little bit of time.
Carri Richard (12:31):
Yes, perfect timing.
I love the grass and I love you, Ebony.
Ebony Gilbert (12:41):
I love you as well, Carri, I really do, and we
will talk again soon.
Yes, until then, grace out,grace out.
Put on your grace face, amen.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Thank you so much for joining us.
If you enjoyed this episode,please let us know.
We love to hear from you andshare it with a friend.
Also, please be sure tosubscribe so you're notified
when a new episode is posted.
We hope you're leaving withanother pointer to grace, a new
perspective that will light itup in your own life.
Until next time, be well, bebold, be kinder to yourself and
(13:25):
be on the lookout.
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