April 30, 2024 • 42 mins
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I hope you are ready for some candid conversations about aging today. I had so much fun with Heather Creekmore bemoaning some of the aspects of aging, and then pivoting that around and talking about how we can be grateful at the same time. Heather and I are just a few months apart and we talk about some of the surprising effects of aging, choosing praise rather than despair about our aging bodies, and how we have both been humbled as we have gotten older.
We discuss:
- Her biggest surprise of aging
- How choosing praise with frustrations of aging can help our heart and mind
- Things we forget to be grateful for as we age
Get your copy of Aging Gratefully here.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
I think we forget to be grateful because we believe
the lies all around us and I'mgoing to call them the lies of
idols that tell us truehappiness is wearing this size.
True happiness is having thiskind of house.
True happiness is havingchildren who act like this.
You know, true happiness is myson gets into this special
(00:22):
college, right?
True happiness is.
True happiness is my son getsinto this special college, right
?
True happiness is.
True happiness is and I thinkaging is a fabulous opportunity
for us to stop and be like wow,god has been with me for 50
years.
He has walked on a path with mefor 50 years.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Hey there, welcome to the Grace Health Podcast, your
source for aging strong in yourphysical, mental and spiritual
health.
My name is Amy Connell.
I'm a weight neutral certifiedpersonal trainer and nutrition
coach who loves walks withfriends, chocolate and Jesus.
Whether you're looking to growstronger as you age, nourish
your body, mind and spirit, orfit all the pieces of your
health together to holisticallythrive, this is the place for
(01:06):
women over 40.
I'm here to guide you in theareas I can and bring on experts
in the areas I'm still learning, and, of course, we cover it
all in a whole lot of grace.
I'm glad you're here.
I hope you are ready for somecandid conversations, with a lot
of laughter, about aging.
Today I had so much fun withHeather Creekmore bemoaning some
(01:30):
of the aspects of aging andthen pivoting that around and
talking about how we can begrateful.
At the same time, heather and Iare just a few months apart and
we talk about some of thesurprising effects of aging,
choosing praise rather thandespair about our changing
bodies and how we have both beenhumbled as we have gotten older
(01:54):
.
I don't know if you ever tookclasses in school or university
that had recommended reading,but if I had to choose a book
for recommended reading here inthe Grace Health community,
heather's book Aging Gratefullywould be it.
Heather is the friend you wantto laugh about the changes,
reframe how you think aboutaging and keeping your eyes
(02:18):
fixed on Jesus as you do.
Aging Gratefully is truly justthe companion you need.
So if any of these are ringinga bell, this is what you need as
you take the next step into thenext phase of your life, with
confidence and gratitude for thestory that God has and
continues to create in you.
(02:40):
I have loved this book so much,and think you will too, and I
have chosen Aging Gratefully tobe a book club selection in our
Graced Health Community Facebookgroup.
We will be meeting in June 2024.
And I will be providing moreinformation over there, so you
have plenty of time to read it.
(03:00):
Be sure to grab your copy andjoin us over on the Facebook
community group.
Let's jump into my conversationwith Heather Creekmore.
I am super thrilled to haveback to the show Heather
Creekmore.
Heather has been on in the pastand I will link that in the
show notes, but Heather is thehost of the compared to who
(03:23):
podcast.
She is a body image coach,author of multiple books, and
one in particular that we'retalking about today, which I
know you guys, I know you'regoing to want to read this.
It is called Aging Gratefully,and it is for those of us who
follow Jesus who are trying tonavigate aging.
(03:48):
So, heather, I'm thrilledyou're here.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
It is so great to be with you, Amy.
Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
You're welcome.
Well, it has been such apleasure to get to know you,
first, I think, through thispodcast, and then you've been so
gracious to endorse your worthybody.
You're looking at your corestrength right now.
I mean, you've just been such agreat friend of the show and
I'm I'm so thrilled to have youback, because it's it's been a
hot minute since you came ontalking about the burden of
better.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Yes, time is flying, though, so it's hard to keep up
right.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Yes, totally, totally Okay.
So you were on the show inseason nine and so the episode
was called is trying to bebetter, burdening your heart,
and we talked some about thatbook, about your first book.
Compared to who, for those ofyou or for those who haven't met
, you tell us some about who youare and what you do, beyond
(04:40):
what I introduced.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Yeah, well, amy, this is not what I ever expected to
be doing and I don't know if Isaid that last time I was on
your show or not, but you know Ilike you.
I was a fitness instructor andyou know I really thought if I
was ever doing anything likethis, they would be telling
people how to lose weight andlook great.
And instead I am talking, Ihope honestly and authentically
(05:08):
and openly with women everysingle week about the ways we
struggle around the pressurethat we hear from people who are
telling us how to lose weightand look great.
We both used to do Right.
We both used to do that Right.
So, yeah, I mean I've been on abody image journey, I'm going to
say since the third grade iswhen I first remember struggling
(05:29):
with this had a whole longhistory of dieting, which now I
would probably, now that I knowmore, I would classify at least
a good portion of that historyas an eating disorder disordered
eating, for sure, but.
But there was a portion, a timeperiod, where I know I fell
into an eating disorder categoryand really God kind of
interrupted life as usual for mewhen I was in my mid-30s and he
(05:54):
showed me that these body imageissues that I had struggled
with for so long and I was surewere about my body.
I was sure as soon as I couldchange my body the body image
issues would just go away andeverything would be, you know,
sunshine and rainbows.
But God showed me that reallywhat I had done was I had made
my body image and really beauty,while looking a certain way I
(06:16):
made it an idol.
And that changed everything forme, amy.
Like because I was raised in aChristian home, I went to church
, I went to Christian schoolsall the way through graduate
school.
So I knew I was fearfully andwonderfully made.
I knew that God looked at myheart and not my gene size.
I really thought I knew all theGod and Jesus answers.
(06:38):
So the fact that there wassomething scripturally that I
had never connected to thisissue, that had literally
weighed me down for decades,like that was eye opening and
that changed everything for me.
And so I still.
Even after that, my own personalchange happened.
I started speaking a little bithere and there to mops, groups
and such, but I was never goingto write about this, like that
(07:01):
was not on my radar.
I wanted to write, but notabout this and eventually, it
was my husband who was like youneed to be writing your body
image story, and I was like, no,no one needs to hear all the
mess that is.
And I did, and that led to thepublication of my first book in
2017, compared to who, and thenthe book that we talked about
last time, the Burden of Better,which came out a couple years
(07:23):
later, and then I just releaseda book called the 40-Day Body
Image Workbook, and my next oneis on aging, called Aging
Gratefully, and we're going totalk about that one today.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
And we're not talking today as much about the 40-Day
Body Image Workbook, but I alsohave that one and that is such a
rich application of taking thescriptures that we know and that
we've heard and working throughthat.
So that is also something.
If you're listening and theseare starting to kind of make
(07:54):
some things go off in your brain, definitely take that as a
resource, and then this is whatwe're going to be talking about
some today as well.
So one of the reasons that,besides just I love being around
you and I love your energy andpresence, even if it's virtual
One of the one of the reasons Iwas excited to have this is you
and I, I think, are right withinthe same age.
(08:17):
I mean, I think we're superclose, so I'm right there with
you.
As we're talking about aging,as we're talking about the stuff
in our bodies that are goingwonky, or at least that feel are
going wonky, I would love it ifyou would share what is has
been thus far the biggestsurprise of aging to you.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Well, so it's funny.
So you know, I'll disclose.
So I turned 50 this year.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Me too.
So the summer, when's yourbirthday?
Speaker 1 (08:45):
July, July.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
Okay, november.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Okay, so I'm a little older than you, amy.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Older and wiser, that's for sure.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
No, but I wrote this book I was 48.
Okay, cause you know, it takesa while to get it published and
such.
And I'm doing all this researchand like Amy, it's embarrassing
to say this but like I didn'tknow that perimenopause was a
thing, like I'd heard peopletalk about menopause and like
(09:15):
everything, like oh, you know,it's all menopause, menopause.
And I'm researching and I'mlike, oh, that's actually not
even the correct term.
Like menopause is that onemoment in time after 12 months
of no period.
And so that was a wholeeducation for me.
And it was kind of funnybecause I think the more I dug
into researching aging, the moreI felt like I was getting older
(09:36):
.
It's like I think writing thisbook is aging me.
But aging is so strange becauseyou watch other people do it,
you hear other people complainabout it, right, and yet I think
somehow we kind of think, well,it really won't happen to me
like that, like we think we'llsomehow miss it, and so yes, I
(10:03):
sat there about five years ago.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
I was like, well, it probably won't hit me as much
because I'm pretty active.
Right, I've been learning this,right, that doesn't prevent
anything.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yeah, I mean, it's so funny and so when it does, it's
like ouch, where did that comefrom?
So I'll disclose this.
I had to go on blood pressuremedication a couple months ago
and I'm like, what in the worldis that about?
I exercise six days a week,like we rarely.
(10:36):
I'm not that there's anythingwrong with eating out, and you
know I don't have those kinds offood rules in my life anymore
but we eat pretty well and wedon't go out very often, so I'm
not eating the quote unquotehigh sodium foods that are going
to kill you with your bloodpressure, kind of thing, right.
And yet I'm like what?
Like that can't be my bloodpressure.
(10:56):
Are you kidding me?
And my doctor, unfortunately,is very gracious and she's like
yeah, this is just kind of anormal thing at your season of
life and I really appreciate thefact that she's taken that
approach.
It was so high I had to go onsomething.
There was no, like we can justtake our time and see if we can
get this down, but it justshocked me.
I'm like wait, in some waysit's like this isn't what I was
(11:20):
promised, right, because thehealth and fitness industry is
like you just do all the thingsand to your point, earlier, you
will avoid aging right, it won'thit you as hard.
You'll never have to go on theblood pressure medication and so
, even like getting thatprescription that was like I
don't know like a line in thesand, was like, oh yikes, my
(11:42):
body's aging too too.
Oh, there might not be anythingI can do about this, and it
hurt.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
You know I was finally able to identify the
word for me that I fell becauseI've been on blood pressure
medication for about 10 yearsand, like you're a doctor.
Thankfully mine was like Amy,you're doing everything right,
I'm not worried about it.
But for me the word wasinsulting.
I'm insulted that I have to popnot one, but two pills, because
(12:14):
I deserve to have good bloodpressure, because I do all the
same things that you do, but wedeserve nothing.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Well, and I'll tell you you want to hear my insult.
I'm driving through thepharmacy to pick up my blood
pressure prescription for thefirst time and this sweet little
pharmacist is like, have youtaken this before?
I said no, this is my firsttime.
And she looks at me and she'slike, well, you know, she told
me a couple of things.
(12:43):
And she's like you should tryexercising Like I do.
You know, it's those kind ofthings that you know will really
get you Well, and being offeredthe senior discount I don't
know if you've had that happen.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
No, not yet.
But recently.
Oh, that's something too.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Yeah, it was I have heard from friends.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
I have a decent amount of friends who are just a
few years older than I am andthey're, like you, hit 50.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
And those AARP things start showing up in the mailbox
Yep.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Which you know, whatever, but okay, so we could
riff off of this.
So, within the vein of thisright, we're sitting here
talking and bemoaning our bloodpressure medication and other
things that may or may not beinsulting to us.
One of the things that I reallyadmire about you, in the work
that you do, is you have such athorough understanding about
(13:38):
scripture and you walk soclosely with God in this that
you can turn everything back tohim with the knowledge like with
the true, deep, well-earnedknowledge of all of this.
I know that you have guided alot of women along in healing
their body image issues with thehelp, in tandem, locking arms
(14:00):
with Jesus, or probably with himleading the way.
Now you're doing this withaging.
So we've talked about bodyimage and now you're doing this
aging.
So tell me some more about that.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Yeah, and you know, I don't again.
I think I got here by accident.
I aged my way into it,apparently.
But aging issues and body imageissues are really all connected
, right, they're all kind of ourresponse to I'm going to say
discontent, and I know thatmight be kind of a controversial
(14:31):
way to phrase it, but it is.
It's a discus, like I wish mybody looked different or I wish
my body wasn't aging in thisparticular way.
I mean, I think there's a lotof women that that maybe their
body image issues are kind oflike you know, I don't know, I'm
gonna say like a low buzz fortheir, you know, 20s, 30s, into
(14:52):
their 40s.
Then all of a sudden, like thevolume gets turned up and
they're like, whoa, now, now, Ineed some help, now I need some
perspective.
What do I do, you know?
And then there's the otherfactor that for some of us I
mean I, you know, I think Iwould be in this category
somewhat I had a lot morecontrol over what my body did.
(15:14):
It felt like not in reality, butit felt like, oh, if I gained a
little bit of weight, I couldjust do something.
And especially when I wasentrenched in diet culture,
right, it was like every bodyproblem had a diet culture
solution.
You want to fix this part.
You do this exercise.
You want to fix your.
You know this weight.
You do this diet.
(15:35):
Aging makes it a little bit morecomplicated.
I mean, we got some agingcreams, we got some wrinkle
cream, and then all the rest ofthe advice sounds pretty similar
to the advice that we heardthrough our 20s, 30s and 40s.
I mean, yes, there's a special,you know, focus on your hormone
way to diet or lose the belly,or whatever my Instagram feed
ads say, but at the end of theday, it's still just.
(15:59):
This is a heart issue.
This is a heart issue and in myheart, I'm saying, either God,
I don't love the way you made mybody, or God, like, I'm really
kind of frustrated that my bodyis aging in this way, and and in
that I'm not placing blame onanyone right, these are thoughts
(16:20):
that I have had, that I'm surethat you have had.
Maybe we didn't say it in thatexact same way, right, but but
there are thoughts that arethere.
But the reality is justrecognizing the truth of wait a
second, how was I made?
What was I made for Right?
And recognizing that culturearound us is saying you were
(16:41):
made to look good or look yourbest, right.
How were you made?
Well, you were made in such away that, if you were doing
everything right, like you would, you know, have this certain
body type and this certain bodysize, like I write about this in
my workbook, actually.
But it's really interesting, ifyou think about the reality,
(17:02):
that a lot of the advice we getaround how we should look sounds
a lot like how we woulddescribe plastic.
Right, Plastic is smooth andit's firm, right, it's solid,
right, but our bodies are notplastic, right, and so for us to
(17:22):
expect them to be smooth andfirm and solid is really to kind
of ignore part of God's designfor us.
Right, like my belly will getbigger after I eat, and God
designed it that way so that Icould have some room to digest.
That's not this serious issue.
That's not anything to beembarrassed about.
(17:43):
That's just the way he designedme.
And so same thing with aging.
What if?
And I heard this on a podcastwhen I was doing research for
the book but what if?
Of, like begrudging the factthat most women around 50 start
to get more weight around themiddle right, which, again, the
(18:03):
Instagram ads tell us is we'regoing to kill us, like we're
killing ourselves by allowingthat to happen, even though
pretty much every woman I knowin this age range has that
happen, no matter what size shestarted out at 70% is the number
I've heard from Amanda Thieb.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yeah, 70%, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
But what if that's the natural way we age?
And what if there's someprotective element to that that?
What I heard was that, insteadof thinking about it as a spare
tire, you should think about itas a life preserver.
As they spare tire, you shouldthink about it as a life
preserver Because, as ourestrogen levels drop, the body
(18:43):
is sending more protective fatto where our vital organs are.
And when I heard that I waslike, well, you know what?
I guess that's nothing to beupset about.
So yeah, I mean that was kindof a long winded, meandering way
to talk about it, but there's alot of similarities between
body image and aging and reallyI just hope to walk women on a
journey where they willrecognize that there's nothing
(19:05):
shameful or wrong about aging.
God didn't make a mistake withthe way your body's aging.
It's okay.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
Right with the way your body's aging, it's okay,
right?
I had this realization theother day and I shared this a
bit with my Grace Health Plussubscribers.
But if I think about like, say,lord willing, I keep saying
like I want to live till I'm 90.
Now I don't know if that'sGod's plan for me, but say that
that's aligned with what God hasfor me, right?
So if I'm thinking about, okay,what does Amy look like at age
(19:38):
90?
Well, she's definitely going tohave more wrinkles.
She probably will have gone allgray by then.
She's going to have, you know,sagging skin and tube socks for
boobs and like all of the things, right, I'm not going to wake
up one day when I'm 90 and bethat way.
There is a natural gradualprocess to get there.
(20:02):
So at nearly 50, I can look at90 year old Amy again, god
willing, and be like, okay, allright, you made it to 90, sister
, well done.
I hope you're thriving andfeeling and functioning well,
cause you know, those are twowords that I use a lot here.
I gotta, I gotta work my waythere and it's, it is a gift,
and I was, I just was listeningto.
(20:24):
I say just, this was a couplemonths ago, by the time this
comes out, I was giving thisexample on my show that Kate
Bowler and Beth Moore weretalking on Kate's podcast and
Kate was saying how aging is agift.
And I don't know if you knowKate, but she has been, yeah,
working.
I mean, she was diagnosed withstage four colon cancer at like
33 or something and thank youGod she's cancer free now.
(20:46):
But like that's a gift and sowe have to, we've got to give
ourselves that grace, that thatspace to be able to do that.
The other thing, too, thatAmanda Thieb taught us she is
author of the book Menopocalypse.
It is not a faith-based book,but it is a wonderful book on
aging and offline.
I said a lot of your nutritionstuff is kind of intuitive,
(21:07):
eating-based.
She said, yeah, it's alignedwith it.
So, because I know you and I,that's been part of our journey
as well, you and I have bothtransitioned, I think, really
kind of, since we knew eachother.
But she was saying that thisage group is I can't remember if
it's the first or second mostprevalent age group for having
eating disorders.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
Oh, I believe that.
Well, there's, it's called.
Oh goodness, it's elderlyanorexia is what I think they're
calling it for, even like ourmoms that are aging, you know,
in their in their 70s, 80s andnow my mom's 75.
And it's in that that was thefirst generation to diet Really.
(21:48):
I mean, they're the RichardSimmons aerobics Weight Watchers
founding, like that's theirgeneration.
In fact, amy, I'm going to showthis on my show.
But my mother-in-law, who Idon't think has ever been more
than five pounds more than youknow what would be comfortable
for her body we just moved herfrom her home into a retirement
(22:11):
facility and I'm going throughher stuff, getting her packed up
, and in her box of her mostprecious things you know her
father's obituary, you knowpictures of the kids at their
birth, these kind of things isher Weight Watchers lifetime
membership material, and we hadto have a conversation about
(22:34):
whether or not she could throwaway her Weight Watchers
Lifetime membership card and soto tie this back to aging, it's
like she doesn't.
It's so funny how entrenchedthese ideas around keeping a
certain size, keeping a certainlook, we don't age out of them
(22:54):
unless, to your point, we areintentional about addressing
them as we age.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
Yeah, I mean, if you think our neurological patterns
automatically revert back tothat, it's a lot of work getting
out.
That's even more so true forthem, and I have a lot of women
in that age group in mycommunity and some of them have
been kind enough to share thatstruggle with me.
And so it is.
It is a real thing.
And so if you're listening andthat's you, I just I mean
(23:23):
Heather and I are, I think, arejust sitting here saying, of
course it makes sense.
It makes sense that you'refeeling that way, and I think
that this is a good segue intotalking about the core of this
devotional.
It is a list of 30 devotionalson aging gratefully, that's the
name of it, and you talk a lotabout choosing praise while we
(23:47):
age.
So walk us through that, and Iwould love it if you I mean, I
know that we have you gave uswonderful examples in here but
what are some practical waysthat we can choose to praise as
we are noticing these thingsthat might bother us?
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Yeah, yeah.
Well, you know I'll just kindof back up like why did I call
the book aging gratefully?
Speaker 2 (24:11):
Because it's brilliant.
That's why.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Because I realized, realized like I had come so far
in my body image struggles, butI was still kind of disparaging
the thought of aging, right,Like that was just a hurdle I
hadn't cleared yet.
And now you know, the book wasnot designed to be about body
image, so it goes beyond that.
I mean, I talk about, you know,being an empty nester, which I
haven't even experienced yet.
But I talk about just thisreality that even in the church
(24:37):
we can sometimes feel like we'veaged out of relevance.
Right, we don't have anythingelse to offer because we're not
the 30-year-old mover and shakeranymore who everyone wants to
lead something.
But yet that's the wrongattitude and really not an
attitude or anything we seeevidenced in Scripture.
But I talk about praise becausethere's a Christian song and I
(24:59):
just heard the line this morningand I can't think about it.
But it's like praise won'tsolve your problem, but it'll
show you how small you are.
I'm butchering his line just alittle bit, but that's the
principle, right, Like praiseisn't necessarily going to zap
me skinny by tomorrow morning,right, it's probably not going
to work at all, but it'll showme, it'll show my heart that God
(25:25):
is big and that God is good andthat he still has a good plan
for my life.
And this little problem ofextra weight around the middle
or whatever aging quote unquotesymptom there is, it's not
really a problem in the schemeof knowing him and in the scheme
(25:46):
of what he has for me to do.
Right, he made my body onpurpose, for a purpose.
He is not surprised that I'maging.
He's not like oh no, now we'reout of ideas.
It happened to her to put her onthe bench right.
No, like, it's not that at all.
So in everything, every part ofaging that we experienced, I've
(26:10):
got my left shoulder.
Oh, goodness gracious, I don'tknow what it is, but my left
shoulder it's not happy with meright now in this season of life
.
You know, and I'll go back tolike, okay, I'm going to start
doing strength training and then, you know, three days and my
left shoulder is like, not withme, you're not.
So, you know.
But but being able to be like,hey, you know, god, I'm going to
(26:32):
praise you anyway, like, thankyou, thank you for the mobility
I do have, even if I'm not ableto lift that weight over my head
on the left side, like, I wantto Thank you that I can still
move my arm, thank you that Ican still type and I can still
carry things.
So you know, praising him, nomatter what the circumstances,
(26:53):
no matter what the ailment is.
You know, it's really like Paulsaid, right, we use Philippians
4.13 out of context.
I think it's Philippians 4.13.
I am so bad with numbers, amy,but the I can do all things
through Christ, who strengthensme verse.
Sometimes I get my numbersmixed up, but I think it's 4.13.
Speaker 2 (27:09):
Yes and yes, that is the one but like if you look at
the context of that scripture.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
That scripture is really about being content.
Right, it's not.
I can do all things.
Through Christ, I can go liftthat 27 pound weight.
There's no such thing as a 27pound weight, 30 pound weight
over my head with my left armright.
It's not about that.
It's that I can be content withwhatever my body is willing to
do or struggling with day to day.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Yeah, that's so good.
That's good encouragement forme too, because, as this is
coming out, as this episode iscoming out, I am releasing this
book for teen girls and, if I'mhonest, between you and me, I
have had a lot of internaldialogue that is not of God.
(27:57):
That has said things like theseteen girls are not going to
listen to you.
You've got too many wrinkles.
You're just another mom to them.
Who are you?
Who are you?
To do this, they need someoneyoung and cute and energetic and
all of that.
And I think that my application, as I'm continuing to learn
(28:21):
from you, is just praising Godfor this process and for the
words that he has put through myfingers, that I hope to get to
it and God will do what he needsto do with it.
So that's so.
Thank you for all of that,because that is good
encouragement for me, and I doneed it because that's something
(28:41):
that's somewhere that I feelvery vulnerable.
If I'm totally honest, and why,in my podcast for teen girls
called lessons to my teenageself, I'm right in bringing on
young women, because I thoughtthey're gonna need a little bit
of more Gen Z in their life, notso much of the Xer.
Yeah, I get it and then andthen I really if what I would
(29:04):
love to do is commiserate on allthe ways that I feel like I'm
aging out of things, includingfashion mostly oh, oh, I get
that.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
You know, I used to wonder why my mom didn't shop in
the junior's department, andnow I understand.
So it's like Mom, like whydon't you wear the cool clothes?
Speaker 2 (29:19):
But now I get it.
Yeah, now I get it.
I know, I know, yeah, aging outof a lot of different things,
but this is, I will turn mythoughts to positive pure,
lovely, kind, gentle, generous,not like oh, what was me?
Speaker 1 (29:36):
Well, we disqualify ourselves, right?
I mean by listening to theenemy we disqualify ourselves,
and you know, not just withaging.
I see this happen with bodymagicians all the time, like I
meet women that are like youknow.
I know God's wanted me to likestart a Bible study or, you know
, be part of the worship team,and as soon as I lose 20 pounds,
I'm going to do that.
God's not given you a pass forthose two decades that he wanted
(30:06):
to use you and you disqualifiedyourself.
I mean reading through theBible and starting in Genesis
every year, right, like Mosesdisqualified himself.
And God's like nope, okay, youdon't want to talk, I'll give
you Aaron.
He doesn't choose the qualified, he qualifies the chosen, right
.
And so you and I are here for apurpose on purpose, right, if
(30:30):
we do what he's asked us to do,and we worry, we don't worry, we
leave the results up to him.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Amen, oh yeah, that's so good.
So we're talking about this andit's funny because we're we're
kind of going back and forth on,like I know I need to praise
and I've got the enemy in myhead and I'm going to show you
to like this, this back andforth right, this very natural
struggle that most of us, if notall of us, go through.
Why do you think we forget tochoose gratefulness and to be
(31:01):
grateful as we age and for thedifferent seasons that we are
going through, or differentrelationship changes, or I mean,
we've talked a lot about bodybut, like you said, there's so
many other ways that to reframethat.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
So why?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
is it so hard to be grateful for that?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
I think we forget to be grateful because we believe
the lies all around us and I'mgoing to call them the lies of
idols that tell us truehappiness is wearing this size.
True happiness is having thiskind of house.
True happiness is havingchildren who act like this.
You know, true happiness is myson gets into this special
(31:40):
college, right?
True happiness is truehappiness.
Is this special college, right?
True happiness is.
True happiness is.
And I think aging is a fabulousopportunity for us to stop and
be like wow, god has been withme for you and I, 50 years.
He has walked on a path with mefor 50 years.
(32:00):
Even when I didn't know it oracknowledge it, he was still
with me.
He's taken care of me.
Everything that has happened inmy life he's been there.
Every good gift is from him.
And so we're like.
50 to me is a beautiful time topause and be like wow, I guess I
(32:22):
really can trust him.
Like wow, I guess I really cantrust him.
But all the voices around us,all those influencers, are
saying what you really need totrust is in my plan, that'll get
you into a hot body at 50.
And then, oh, then, you'll befeeling good, right, right.
And now I do think the blessingof age, amy, is that I'm able
(32:44):
to say, oh wait, but I triedthat at 20, at 21, at 22.
I tried that for 30 years andit didn't work.
Maybe now I can pause and belike, okay, there's another way.
So that contentedness, I think,our ability to have gratitude
for where we're at, I think thatour ability to have gratitude
(33:05):
for where we're at, I thinkcomes from our maturity and
being able to pause andacknowledge all the ways that
the Lord has been with us.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
That's wonderful.
That's such great encouragementand wisdom and I just love that
you do that, and I love thatyou do that in aging gratefully.
So, heather, this is what Iwant you to know, as I have.
I have not gotten a chance toread through all of it, but I've
gotten a chance to read throughenough of it that, as I am
(33:38):
reading, I am sitting herethinking how can I get one copy
of this in every single person'shands who walks in the doors of
Grace Health?
Because what you have createdis such a compliment to what
we're doing here.
It has so much more wisdom,biblical, scriptural truth,
(34:01):
because that's just part ofwhere you are and I so
emphatically encourage everybodyto grab one of these and I
don't I don't say that veryoften, but this is one.
You guys, you have got to getthis.
It is, it is rich, it is lovely, it is funny, it is authentic,
(34:26):
and I know so many of you havestruggled with a lot of the
things that we're talking about,because we're all about
resilient aging here.
You want to age resiliently.
Grab this book and no,heather's not paying me to say
this.
It's wonderful, heather, it'swonderful, it's wonderful, thank
you.
Thank you for putting this out.
(34:47):
It's going to bless people,yeah, so is there anything more
besides my little monologuethere about what you would like
to tell people about, gratefully?
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Aging.
Yeah, you know, it was ajourney for me, right?
And I say that with every book,right, I feel like every book
God takes me on a journey andfor me, this was my journey into
this season of aging and reallyquestioning like, wow, like
there's a lot of change comingright and change whoo, that's
(35:20):
hard.
That's never been my favoritething.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
Yeah, I think we're done.
I don't think turning 50 meansthat we're done changing.
I think there's more to come.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
Right, and I had a woman I think it was on my show
I, you know, maybe I was on hershow and she said I don't
remember, but it was this weekand she said that she heard the
statistic that women will changebra sizes seven times over the
course of their life and Ithought that was like hilarious.
And then I was like, oh yeah,I'm probably on like number five
, so maybe I'm gonna beat thatseven average, but I you know
(35:52):
there's more change coming andso what does it look like to not
face it, like culture tells usto face it?
Like freak out, you know, panicor just be angry about it.
I don't.
I love the holderness family.
I think that they do hilariousvideos.
I don't know if you know whothey are, kim and pen.
They they do funny parodyvideos.
(36:14):
He, yeah, she just did one.
She did one on perimenopause,menopause yes, and it was
hilarious, right.
Yes, and she, and she said atthe end she kind of like rambles
about it she said her husbandwrote it in like four seconds.
He like knew all her symptoms.
But I think the more we cantalk about this, right, and
(36:36):
that's why you're doing suchgreat work talking about this
Like we don't hear it enoughthat the change is normal and
that we'll be okay through thechange, all we hear is be
prepared.
The worst of the end is coming.
You know, fight it, fight it,fight it Right.
And so I don't know.
(36:57):
I just hope that this book is aresource that will help us
embrace it might be too strongof a term for some, but will
help us walk through it knowingwe're not alone and that it's
normal and we're okay.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Right, right, maybe be content.
Right with it, right, yeah, no,that's great.
Okay, heather, I've got somequestions.
I asked all my guests and Ihave to admit I don't remember
that.
Your answer to the first one.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
Yep, you did ask it before I did.
Okay, I'm so sorry, I don'tremember that.
Your answer to the first one.
Okay, yes, yep, you did ask itbefore.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
I did.
Okay, I'm so sorry I don'tremember that Season nine was a
long time ago by the way we'reon season 20.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
I get it Okay, so you know the question.
I love learning about people'stattoos.
I don't have one, but what Ifound is when people get a
tattoo, they often do it withpurpose or meaning.
So do you have any tattoos?
And if so, what is it?
And if you?
But if you had to get one andyou don't have one, but you had
to get one what would it be andwhere would it go?
Speaker 1 (37:53):
Yeah, so if I do not have any and if I had to get one
, I think I might show thisexact same answer.
So hopefully I'm beingconsistent.
My husband and I talked aboutit.
I think the Duck Dynasty peopledid this, so it was an original
idea getting wedding ringtattoos, you know, because it
would be easier to work out.
Yes, you didn't have to wearyour ring, so that's that's
(38:14):
probably the only place in mybody that I would not be as
scared, although I don't know,fingers are kind of sensitive,
aren't they?
I like the whole concept ofgetting a tattoo scares me a
little bit.
I'll be honest, I don't likepain.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
I like that idea.
It's funny.
I will spend a lot of my Sundaymornings.
I get up early, I go to thetrack, I do a track workout and
then I go to church and oftenthere is a gentleman there.
The only thing I know about himis his name is Kevin, because
I'm a weird person.
When I see someone more thanabout two times I'm like hey, I
(38:47):
see you, I haven't met you.
My name is Amy, so all I knowis his name is Kevin, and I'm
often there by myself, and he'soften there by himself and and I
.
It occurred to me that I take myrings off when I sleep, when I
go to bed, and I don't put themback on until I shower.
And I thought, oh man, I hopehe's not hitting on him.
Oh, what's your name?
Tattoo wedding ring wouldprobably be good.
(39:08):
I'm not being flirtatious, butI'm being friendly and you know
things are received a lotdifferently.
That would probably be helpful.
Okay, all right, heather, tellpeople how they can connect with
you and where, however, youwant to do that, and then where
they can buy the book AgingGratefully.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Yeah, so you can connect with me at
improvebodyimagecom.
My podcast is called Comparedto who, but my courses and my
coaching and really informationabout all of my books and any
like bonuses and such are atimprovebodyimagecom and then the
book is published by Our DailyBread so you can actually go to
(39:49):
them if you're already.
You know part.
A lot of people get the OurDaily Bread devotionals.
If you're already on their list, you'll probably start getting
information about this book soon.
But you can get it on Amazonand everywhere books are sold.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
All right, that sounds good.
Okay, do you have a meaningfulBible verse that you would like
to share?
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Oh, there's so many meaningful Bible verses.
You know I always talk aboutJonah 2.8.
Those who pay attention to vainidols forsake all hope of
steadfast love.
And it's a verse that you knowspoken as Jonah's in the belly
of the whale, so he's kind ofalready had his come to Jesus
(40:30):
moment, if you will.
And to me this is just areminder that, oh, when I get so
caught up in, oh, I wish Ilooked different.
Oh, I wish I didn't have somany forehead wrinkles, oh, I
wish my stomach looked different.
Right, it's no, no, no, no.
No.
Steadfast love comes from thefather.
I'm not earning it right, andas I chase the lies of these
(40:56):
idols, I'm actually gettingfurther from him rather than
getting closer to him.
And if the one thing I trulydesire is that love, that
unconditional love, chasingthese idols aren't going to get
me any closer to it.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
Yeah, amen, so good, okay, you get the last word.
What is the one simple thingthat you would like us to
remember, big or small?
Just a little nugget to hold onto as we go through our aging
process.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
Yeah, aging is natural and God's not surprised
by it.
You have not aged out ofrelevance.
Speaker 2 (41:35):
So good.
Okay, that is all for today.
Go out there and have a gracedday.
Thanks for listening today.
If this episode was valuable toyou, could you do one of two
things that are enormouslyvaluable to me but super simple
for you?
Number one just share this witha friend.
Super simple.
Number two provide a rating andreview, particularly if you
(41:58):
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This is super valuable for me.
Also, if you haven't yetsubscribed to my monthly journal
, why not?
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You never know what you'regoing to get, but I promise it
(42:19):
will add value to your day.
You can sign up atgracedhealthcom slash monthly
dash updates and, of course, thelink is in the show notes.
Thanks again for listening andI'll see you next time.
I think we forget to be grateful because we believe
the lies all around us and I'mgoing to call them the lies of
idols that tell us truehappiness is wearing this size.
True happiness is having thiskind of house.
True happiness is havingchildren who act like this.
You know, true happiness is myson gets into this special
(00:22):
college, right?
True happiness is.
True happiness is my son getsinto this special college, right
?
True happiness is.
True happiness is and I thinkaging is a fabulous opportunity
for us to stop and be like wow,god has been with me for 50
years.
He has walked on a path with mefor 50 years.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
Hey there, welcome to the Grace Health Podcast, your
source for aging strong in yourphysical, mental and spiritual
health.
My name is Amy Connell.
I'm a weight neutral certifiedpersonal trainer and nutrition
coach who loves walks withfriends, chocolate and Jesus.
Whether you're looking to growstronger as you age, nourish
your body, mind and spirit, orfit all the pieces of your
health together to holisticallythrive, this is the place for
(01:06):
women over 40.
I'm here to guide you in theareas I can and bring on experts
in the areas I'm still learning, and, of course, we cover it
all in a whole lot of grace.
I'm glad you're here.
I hope you are ready for somecandid conversations, with a lot
of laughter, about aging.
Today I had so much fun withHeather Creekmore bemoaning some
(01:30):
of the aspects of aging andthen pivoting that around and
talking about how we can begrateful.
At the same time, heather and Iare just a few months apart and
we talk about some of thesurprising effects of aging,
choosing praise rather thandespair about our changing
bodies and how we have both beenhumbled as we have gotten older
(01:54):
.
I don't know if you ever tookclasses in school or university
that had recommended reading,but if I had to choose a book
for recommended reading here inthe Grace Health community,
heather's book Aging Gratefullywould be it.
Heather is the friend you wantto laugh about the changes,
reframe how you think aboutaging and keeping your eyes
(02:18):
fixed on Jesus as you do.
Aging Gratefully is truly justthe companion you need.
So if any of these are ringinga bell, this is what you need as
you take the next step into thenext phase of your life, with
confidence and gratitude for thestory that God has and
continues to create in you.
(02:40):
I have loved this book so much,and think you will too, and I
have chosen Aging Gratefully tobe a book club selection in our
Graced Health Community Facebookgroup.
We will be meeting in June 2024.
And I will be providing moreinformation over there, so you
have plenty of time to read it.
(03:00):
Be sure to grab your copy andjoin us over on the Facebook
community group.
Let's jump into my conversationwith Heather Creekmore.
I am super thrilled to haveback to the show Heather
Creekmore.
Heather has been on in the pastand I will link that in the
show notes, but Heather is thehost of the compared to who
(03:23):
podcast.
She is a body image coach,author of multiple books, and
one in particular that we'retalking about today, which I
know you guys, I know you'regoing to want to read this.
It is called Aging Gratefully,and it is for those of us who
follow Jesus who are trying tonavigate aging.
(03:48):
So, heather, I'm thrilledyou're here.
Welcome to the show.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
It is so great to be with you, Amy.
Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (03:56):
You're welcome.
Well, it has been such apleasure to get to know you,
first, I think, through thispodcast, and then you've been so
gracious to endorse your worthybody.
You're looking at your corestrength right now.
I mean, you've just been such agreat friend of the show and
I'm I'm so thrilled to have youback, because it's it's been a
hot minute since you came ontalking about the burden of
better.
Speaker 1 (04:15):
Yes, time is flying, though, so it's hard to keep up
right.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Yes, totally, totally Okay.
So you were on the show inseason nine and so the episode
was called is trying to bebetter, burdening your heart,
and we talked some about thatbook, about your first book.
Compared to who, for those ofyou or for those who haven't met
, you tell us some about who youare and what you do, beyond
(04:40):
what I introduced.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Yeah, well, amy, this is not what I ever expected to
be doing and I don't know if Isaid that last time I was on
your show or not, but you know Ilike you.
I was a fitness instructor andyou know I really thought if I
was ever doing anything likethis, they would be telling
people how to lose weight andlook great.
And instead I am talking, Ihope honestly and authentically
(05:08):
and openly with women everysingle week about the ways we
struggle around the pressurethat we hear from people who are
telling us how to lose weightand look great.
We both used to do Right.
We both used to do that Right.
So, yeah, I mean I've been on abody image journey, I'm going to
say since the third grade iswhen I first remember struggling
(05:29):
with this had a whole longhistory of dieting, which now I
would probably, now that I knowmore, I would classify at least
a good portion of that historyas an eating disorder disordered
eating, for sure, but.
But there was a portion, a timeperiod, where I know I fell
into an eating disorder categoryand really God kind of
interrupted life as usual for mewhen I was in my mid-30s and he
(05:54):
showed me that these body imageissues that I had struggled
with for so long and I was surewere about my body.
I was sure as soon as I couldchange my body the body image
issues would just go away andeverything would be, you know,
sunshine and rainbows.
But God showed me that reallywhat I had done was I had made
my body image and really beauty,while looking a certain way I
(06:16):
made it an idol.
And that changed everything forme, amy.
Like because I was raised in aChristian home, I went to church
, I went to Christian schoolsall the way through graduate
school.
So I knew I was fearfully andwonderfully made.
I knew that God looked at myheart and not my gene size.
I really thought I knew all theGod and Jesus answers.
(06:38):
So the fact that there wassomething scripturally that I
had never connected to thisissue, that had literally
weighed me down for decades,like that was eye opening and
that changed everything for me.
And so I still.
Even after that, my own personalchange happened.
I started speaking a little bithere and there to mops, groups
and such, but I was never goingto write about this, like that
(07:01):
was not on my radar.
I wanted to write, but notabout this and eventually, it
was my husband who was like youneed to be writing your body
image story, and I was like, no,no one needs to hear all the
mess that is.
And I did, and that led to thepublication of my first book in
2017, compared to who, and thenthe book that we talked about
last time, the Burden of Better,which came out a couple years
(07:23):
later, and then I just releaseda book called the 40-Day Body
Image Workbook, and my next oneis on aging, called Aging
Gratefully, and we're going totalk about that one today.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
And we're not talking today as much about the 40-Day
Body Image Workbook, but I alsohave that one and that is such a
rich application of taking thescriptures that we know and that
we've heard and working throughthat.
So that is also something.
If you're listening and theseare starting to kind of make
(07:54):
some things go off in your brain, definitely take that as a
resource, and then this is whatwe're going to be talking about
some today as well.
So one of the reasons that,besides just I love being around
you and I love your energy andpresence, even if it's virtual
One of the one of the reasons Iwas excited to have this is you
and I, I think, are right withinthe same age.
(08:17):
I mean, I think we're superclose, so I'm right there with
you.
As we're talking about aging,as we're talking about the stuff
in our bodies that are goingwonky, or at least that feel are
going wonky, I would love it ifyou would share what is has
been thus far the biggestsurprise of aging to you.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
Well, so it's funny.
So you know, I'll disclose.
So I turned 50 this year.
Speaker 2 (08:43):
Me too.
So the summer, when's yourbirthday?
Speaker 1 (08:45):
July, July.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
Okay, november.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
Okay, so I'm a little older than you, amy.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Older and wiser, that's for sure.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
No, but I wrote this book I was 48.
Okay, cause you know, it takesa while to get it published and
such.
And I'm doing all this researchand like Amy, it's embarrassing
to say this but like I didn'tknow that perimenopause was a
thing, like I'd heard peopletalk about menopause and like
(09:15):
everything, like oh, you know,it's all menopause, menopause.
And I'm researching and I'mlike, oh, that's actually not
even the correct term.
Like menopause is that onemoment in time after 12 months
of no period.
And so that was a wholeeducation for me.
And it was kind of funnybecause I think the more I dug
into researching aging, the moreI felt like I was getting older
(09:36):
.
It's like I think writing thisbook is aging me.
But aging is so strange becauseyou watch other people do it,
you hear other people complainabout it, right, and yet I think
somehow we kind of think, well,it really won't happen to me
like that, like we think we'llsomehow miss it, and so yes, I
(10:03):
sat there about five years ago.
Speaker 2 (10:04):
I was like, well, it probably won't hit me as much
because I'm pretty active.
Right, I've been learning this,right, that doesn't prevent
anything.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yeah, I mean, it's so funny and so when it does, it's
like ouch, where did that comefrom?
So I'll disclose this.
I had to go on blood pressuremedication a couple months ago
and I'm like, what in the worldis that about?
I exercise six days a week,like we rarely.
(10:36):
I'm not that there's anythingwrong with eating out, and you
know I don't have those kinds offood rules in my life anymore
but we eat pretty well and wedon't go out very often, so I'm
not eating the quote unquotehigh sodium foods that are going
to kill you with your bloodpressure, kind of thing, right.
And yet I'm like what?
Like that can't be my bloodpressure.
(10:56):
Are you kidding me?
And my doctor, unfortunately,is very gracious and she's like
yeah, this is just kind of anormal thing at your season of
life and I really appreciate thefact that she's taken that
approach.
It was so high I had to go onsomething.
There was no, like we can justtake our time and see if we can
get this down, but it justshocked me.
I'm like wait, in some waysit's like this isn't what I was
(11:20):
promised, right, because thehealth and fitness industry is
like you just do all the thingsand to your point, earlier, you
will avoid aging right, it won'thit you as hard.
You'll never have to go on theblood pressure medication and so
, even like getting thatprescription that was like I
don't know like a line in thesand, was like, oh yikes, my
(11:42):
body's aging too too.
Oh, there might not be anythingI can do about this, and it
hurt.
Speaker 2 (11:52):
You know I was finally able to identify the
word for me that I fell becauseI've been on blood pressure
medication for about 10 yearsand, like you're a doctor.
Thankfully mine was like Amy,you're doing everything right,
I'm not worried about it.
But for me the word wasinsulting.
I'm insulted that I have to popnot one, but two pills, because
(12:14):
I deserve to have good bloodpressure, because I do all the
same things that you do, but wedeserve nothing.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
Well, and I'll tell you you want to hear my insult.
I'm driving through thepharmacy to pick up my blood
pressure prescription for thefirst time and this sweet little
pharmacist is like, have youtaken this before?
I said no, this is my firsttime.
And she looks at me and she'slike, well, you know, she told
me a couple of things.
(12:43):
And she's like you should tryexercising Like I do.
You know, it's those kind ofthings that you know will really
get you Well, and being offeredthe senior discount I don't
know if you've had that happen.
Speaker 2 (12:57):
No, not yet.
But recently.
Oh, that's something too.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Yeah, it was I have heard from friends.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
I have a decent amount of friends who are just a
few years older than I am andthey're, like you, hit 50.
Speaker 1 (13:09):
And those AARP things start showing up in the mailbox
Yep.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Which you know, whatever, but okay, so we could
riff off of this.
So, within the vein of thisright, we're sitting here
talking and bemoaning our bloodpressure medication and other
things that may or may not beinsulting to us.
One of the things that I reallyadmire about you, in the work
that you do, is you have such athorough understanding about
(13:38):
scripture and you walk soclosely with God in this that
you can turn everything back tohim with the knowledge like with
the true, deep, well-earnedknowledge of all of this.
I know that you have guided alot of women along in healing
their body image issues with thehelp, in tandem, locking arms
(14:00):
with Jesus, or probably with himleading the way.
Now you're doing this withaging.
So we've talked about bodyimage and now you're doing this
aging.
So tell me some more about that.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
Yeah, and you know, I don't again.
I think I got here by accident.
I aged my way into it,apparently.
But aging issues and body imageissues are really all connected
, right, they're all kind of ourresponse to I'm going to say
discontent, and I know thatmight be kind of a controversial
(14:31):
way to phrase it, but it is.
It's a discus, like I wish mybody looked different or I wish
my body wasn't aging in thisparticular way.
I mean, I think there's a lotof women that that maybe their
body image issues are kind oflike you know, I don't know, I'm
gonna say like a low buzz fortheir, you know, 20s, 30s, into
(14:52):
their 40s.
Then all of a sudden, like thevolume gets turned up and
they're like, whoa, now, now, Ineed some help, now I need some
perspective.
What do I do, you know?
And then there's the otherfactor that for some of us I
mean I, you know, I think Iwould be in this category
somewhat I had a lot morecontrol over what my body did.
(15:14):
It felt like not in reality, butit felt like, oh, if I gained a
little bit of weight, I couldjust do something.
And especially when I wasentrenched in diet culture,
right, it was like every bodyproblem had a diet culture
solution.
You want to fix this part.
You do this exercise.
You want to fix your.
You know this weight.
You do this diet.
(15:35):
Aging makes it a little bit morecomplicated.
I mean, we got some agingcreams, we got some wrinkle
cream, and then all the rest ofthe advice sounds pretty similar
to the advice that we heardthrough our 20s, 30s and 40s.
I mean, yes, there's a special,you know, focus on your hormone
way to diet or lose the belly,or whatever my Instagram feed
ads say, but at the end of theday, it's still just.
(15:59):
This is a heart issue.
This is a heart issue and in myheart, I'm saying, either God,
I don't love the way you made mybody, or God, like, I'm really
kind of frustrated that my bodyis aging in this way, and and in
that I'm not placing blame onanyone right, these are thoughts
(16:20):
that I have had, that I'm surethat you have had.
Maybe we didn't say it in thatexact same way, right, but but
there are thoughts that arethere.
But the reality is justrecognizing the truth of wait a
second, how was I made?
What was I made for Right?
And recognizing that culturearound us is saying you were
(16:41):
made to look good or look yourbest, right.
How were you made?
Well, you were made in such away that, if you were doing
everything right, like you would, you know, have this certain
body type and this certain bodysize, like I write about this in
my workbook, actually.
But it's really interesting, ifyou think about the reality,
(17:02):
that a lot of the advice we getaround how we should look sounds
a lot like how we woulddescribe plastic.
Right, Plastic is smooth andit's firm, right, it's solid,
right, but our bodies are notplastic, right, and so for us to
(17:22):
expect them to be smooth andfirm and solid is really to kind
of ignore part of God's designfor us.
Right, like my belly will getbigger after I eat, and God
designed it that way so that Icould have some room to digest.
That's not this serious issue.
That's not anything to beembarrassed about.
(17:43):
That's just the way he designedme.
And so same thing with aging.
What if?
And I heard this on a podcastwhen I was doing research for
the book but what if?
Of, like begrudging the factthat most women around 50 start
to get more weight around themiddle right, which, again, the
(18:03):
Instagram ads tell us is we'regoing to kill us, like we're
killing ourselves by allowingthat to happen, even though
pretty much every woman I knowin this age range has that
happen, no matter what size shestarted out at 70% is the number
I've heard from Amanda Thieb.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Yeah, 70%, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
But what if that's the natural way we age?
And what if there's someprotective element to that that?
What I heard was that, insteadof thinking about it as a spare
tire, you should think about itas a life preserver.
As they spare tire, you shouldthink about it as a life
preserver Because, as ourestrogen levels drop, the body
(18:43):
is sending more protective fatto where our vital organs are.
And when I heard that I waslike, well, you know what?
I guess that's nothing to beupset about.
So yeah, I mean that was kindof a long winded, meandering way
to talk about it, but there's alot of similarities between
body image and aging and reallyI just hope to walk women on a
journey where they willrecognize that there's nothing
(19:05):
shameful or wrong about aging.
God didn't make a mistake withthe way your body's aging.
It's okay.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
Right with the way your body's aging, it's okay,
right?
I had this realization theother day and I shared this a
bit with my Grace Health Plussubscribers.
But if I think about like, say,lord willing, I keep saying
like I want to live till I'm 90.
Now I don't know if that'sGod's plan for me, but say that
that's aligned with what God hasfor me, right?
So if I'm thinking about, okay,what does Amy look like at age
(19:38):
90?
Well, she's definitely going tohave more wrinkles.
She probably will have gone allgray by then.
She's going to have, you know,sagging skin and tube socks for
boobs and like all of the things, right, I'm not going to wake
up one day when I'm 90 and bethat way.
There is a natural gradualprocess to get there.
(20:02):
So at nearly 50, I can look at90 year old Amy again, god
willing, and be like, okay, allright, you made it to 90, sister
, well done.
I hope you're thriving andfeeling and functioning well,
cause you know, those are twowords that I use a lot here.
I gotta, I gotta work my waythere and it's, it is a gift,
and I was, I just was listeningto.
(20:24):
I say just, this was a couplemonths ago, by the time this
comes out, I was giving thisexample on my show that Kate
Bowler and Beth Moore weretalking on Kate's podcast and
Kate was saying how aging is agift.
And I don't know if you knowKate, but she has been, yeah,
working.
I mean, she was diagnosed withstage four colon cancer at like
33 or something and thank youGod she's cancer free now.
(20:46):
But like that's a gift and sowe have to, we've got to give
ourselves that grace, that thatspace to be able to do that.
The other thing, too, thatAmanda Thieb taught us she is
author of the book Menopocalypse.
It is not a faith-based book,but it is a wonderful book on
aging and offline.
I said a lot of your nutritionstuff is kind of intuitive,
(21:07):
eating-based.
She said, yeah, it's alignedwith it.
So, because I know you and I,that's been part of our journey
as well, you and I have bothtransitioned, I think, really
kind of, since we knew eachother.
But she was saying that thisage group is I can't remember if
it's the first or second mostprevalent age group for having
eating disorders.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
Oh, I believe that.
Well, there's, it's called.
Oh goodness, it's elderlyanorexia is what I think they're
calling it for, even like ourmoms that are aging, you know,
in their in their 70s, 80s andnow my mom's 75.
And it's in that that was thefirst generation to diet Really.
(21:48):
I mean, they're the RichardSimmons aerobics Weight Watchers
founding, like that's theirgeneration.
In fact, amy, I'm going to showthis on my show.
But my mother-in-law, who Idon't think has ever been more
than five pounds more than youknow what would be comfortable
for her body we just moved herfrom her home into a retirement
(22:11):
facility and I'm going throughher stuff, getting her packed up
, and in her box of her mostprecious things you know her
father's obituary, you knowpictures of the kids at their
birth, these kind of things isher Weight Watchers lifetime
membership material, and we hadto have a conversation about
(22:34):
whether or not she could throwaway her Weight Watchers
Lifetime membership card and soto tie this back to aging, it's
like she doesn't.
It's so funny how entrenchedthese ideas around keeping a
certain size, keeping a certainlook, we don't age out of them
(22:54):
unless, to your point, we areintentional about addressing
them as we age.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
Yeah, I mean, if you think our neurological patterns
automatically revert back tothat, it's a lot of work getting
out.
That's even more so true forthem, and I have a lot of women
in that age group in mycommunity and some of them have
been kind enough to share thatstruggle with me.
And so it is.
It is a real thing.
And so if you're listening andthat's you, I just I mean
(23:23):
Heather and I are, I think, arejust sitting here saying, of
course it makes sense.
It makes sense that you'refeeling that way, and I think
that this is a good segue intotalking about the core of this
devotional.
It is a list of 30 devotionalson aging gratefully, that's the
name of it, and you talk a lotabout choosing praise while we
(23:47):
age.
So walk us through that, and Iwould love it if you I mean, I
know that we have you gave uswonderful examples in here but
what are some practical waysthat we can choose to praise as
we are noticing these thingsthat might bother us?
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Yeah, yeah.
Well, you know I'll just kindof back up like why did I call
the book aging gratefully?
Speaker 2 (24:11):
Because it's brilliant.
That's why.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Because I realized, realized like I had come so far
in my body image struggles, butI was still kind of disparaging
the thought of aging, right,Like that was just a hurdle I
hadn't cleared yet.
And now you know, the book wasnot designed to be about body
image, so it goes beyond that.
I mean, I talk about, you know,being an empty nester, which I
haven't even experienced yet.
But I talk about just thisreality that even in the church
(24:37):
we can sometimes feel like we'veaged out of relevance.
Right, we don't have anythingelse to offer because we're not
the 30-year-old mover and shakeranymore who everyone wants to
lead something.
But yet that's the wrongattitude and really not an
attitude or anything we seeevidenced in Scripture.
But I talk about praise becausethere's a Christian song and I
(24:59):
just heard the line this morningand I can't think about it.
But it's like praise won'tsolve your problem, but it'll
show you how small you are.
I'm butchering his line just alittle bit, but that's the
principle, right, Like praiseisn't necessarily going to zap
me skinny by tomorrow morning,right, it's probably not going
to work at all, but it'll showme, it'll show my heart that God
(25:25):
is big and that God is good andthat he still has a good plan
for my life.
And this little problem ofextra weight around the middle
or whatever aging quote unquotesymptom there is, it's not
really a problem in the schemeof knowing him and in the scheme
(25:46):
of what he has for me to do.
Right, he made my body onpurpose, for a purpose.
He is not surprised that I'maging.
He's not like oh no, now we'reout of ideas.
It happened to her to put her onthe bench right.
No, like, it's not that at all.
So in everything, every part ofaging that we experienced, I've
(26:10):
got my left shoulder.
Oh, goodness gracious, I don'tknow what it is, but my left
shoulder it's not happy with meright now in this season of life
.
You know, and I'll go back tolike, okay, I'm going to start
doing strength training and then, you know, three days and my
left shoulder is like, not withme, you're not.
So, you know.
But but being able to be like,hey, you know, god, I'm going to
(26:32):
praise you anyway, like, thankyou, thank you for the mobility
I do have, even if I'm not ableto lift that weight over my head
on the left side, like, I wantto Thank you that I can still
move my arm, thank you that Ican still type and I can still
carry things.
So you know, praising him, nomatter what the circumstances,
(26:53):
no matter what the ailment is.
You know, it's really like Paulsaid, right, we use Philippians
4.13 out of context.
I think it's Philippians 4.13.
I am so bad with numbers, amy,but the I can do all things
through Christ, who strengthensme verse.
Sometimes I get my numbersmixed up, but I think it's 4.13.
Speaker 2 (27:09):
Yes and yes, that is the one but like if you look at
the context of that scripture.
Speaker 1 (27:15):
That scripture is really about being content.
Right, it's not.
I can do all things.
Through Christ, I can go liftthat 27 pound weight.
There's no such thing as a 27pound weight, 30 pound weight
over my head with my left armright.
It's not about that.
It's that I can be content withwhatever my body is willing to
do or struggling with day to day.
Speaker 2 (27:36):
Yeah, that's so good.
That's good encouragement forme too, because, as this is
coming out, as this episode iscoming out, I am releasing this
book for teen girls and, if I'mhonest, between you and me, I
have had a lot of internaldialogue that is not of God.
(27:57):
That has said things like theseteen girls are not going to
listen to you.
You've got too many wrinkles.
You're just another mom to them.
Who are you?
Who are you?
To do this, they need someoneyoung and cute and energetic and
all of that.
And I think that my application, as I'm continuing to learn
(28:21):
from you, is just praising Godfor this process and for the
words that he has put through myfingers, that I hope to get to
it and God will do what he needsto do with it.
So that's so.
Thank you for all of that,because that is good
encouragement for me, and I doneed it because that's something
(28:41):
that's somewhere that I feelvery vulnerable.
If I'm totally honest, and why,in my podcast for teen girls
called lessons to my teenageself, I'm right in bringing on
young women, because I thoughtthey're gonna need a little bit
of more Gen Z in their life, notso much of the Xer.
Yeah, I get it and then andthen I really if what I would
(29:04):
love to do is commiserate on allthe ways that I feel like I'm
aging out of things, includingfashion mostly oh, oh, I get
that.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
You know, I used to wonder why my mom didn't shop in
the junior's department, andnow I understand.
So it's like Mom, like whydon't you wear the cool clothes?
Speaker 2 (29:19):
But now I get it.
Yeah, now I get it.
I know, I know, yeah, aging outof a lot of different things,
but this is, I will turn mythoughts to positive pure,
lovely, kind, gentle, generous,not like oh, what was me?
Speaker 1 (29:36):
Well, we disqualify ourselves, right?
I mean by listening to theenemy we disqualify ourselves,
and you know, not just withaging.
I see this happen with bodymagicians all the time, like I
meet women that are like youknow.
I know God's wanted me to likestart a Bible study or, you know
, be part of the worship team,and as soon as I lose 20 pounds,
I'm going to do that.
God's not given you a pass forthose two decades that he wanted
(30:06):
to use you and you disqualifiedyourself.
I mean reading through theBible and starting in Genesis
every year, right, like Mosesdisqualified himself.
And God's like nope, okay, youdon't want to talk, I'll give
you Aaron.
He doesn't choose the qualified, he qualifies the chosen, right
.
And so you and I are here for apurpose on purpose, right, if
(30:30):
we do what he's asked us to do,and we worry, we don't worry, we
leave the results up to him.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Amen, oh yeah, that's so good.
So we're talking about this andit's funny because we're we're
kind of going back and forth on,like I know I need to praise
and I've got the enemy in myhead and I'm going to show you
to like this, this back andforth right, this very natural
struggle that most of us, if notall of us, go through.
Why do you think we forget tochoose gratefulness and to be
(31:01):
grateful as we age and for thedifferent seasons that we are
going through, or differentrelationship changes, or I mean,
we've talked a lot about bodybut, like you said, there's so
many other ways that to reframethat.
Speaker 1 (31:16):
So why?
Speaker 2 (31:16):
is it so hard to be grateful for that?
Speaker 1 (31:20):
I think we forget to be grateful because we believe
the lies all around us and I'mgoing to call them the lies of
idols that tell us truehappiness is wearing this size.
True happiness is having thiskind of house.
True happiness is havingchildren who act like this.
You know, true happiness is myson gets into this special
(31:40):
college, right?
True happiness is truehappiness.
Is this special college, right?
True happiness is.
True happiness is.
And I think aging is a fabulousopportunity for us to stop and
be like wow, god has been withme for you and I, 50 years.
He has walked on a path with mefor 50 years.
(32:00):
Even when I didn't know it oracknowledge it, he was still
with me.
He's taken care of me.
Everything that has happened inmy life he's been there.
Every good gift is from him.
And so we're like.
50 to me is a beautiful time topause and be like wow, I guess I
(32:22):
really can trust him.
Like wow, I guess I really cantrust him.
But all the voices around us,all those influencers, are
saying what you really need totrust is in my plan, that'll get
you into a hot body at 50.
And then, oh, then, you'll befeeling good, right, right.
And now I do think the blessingof age, amy, is that I'm able
(32:44):
to say, oh wait, but I triedthat at 20, at 21, at 22.
I tried that for 30 years andit didn't work.
Maybe now I can pause and belike, okay, there's another way.
So that contentedness, I think,our ability to have gratitude
for where we're at, I think thatour ability to have gratitude
(33:05):
for where we're at, I thinkcomes from our maturity and
being able to pause andacknowledge all the ways that
the Lord has been with us.
Speaker 2 (33:17):
That's wonderful.
That's such great encouragementand wisdom and I just love that
you do that, and I love thatyou do that in aging gratefully.
So, heather, this is what Iwant you to know, as I have.
I have not gotten a chance toread through all of it, but I've
gotten a chance to read throughenough of it that, as I am
(33:38):
reading, I am sitting herethinking how can I get one copy
of this in every single person'shands who walks in the doors of
Grace Health?
Because what you have createdis such a compliment to what
we're doing here.
It has so much more wisdom,biblical, scriptural truth,
(34:01):
because that's just part ofwhere you are and I so
emphatically encourage everybodyto grab one of these and I
don't I don't say that veryoften, but this is one.
You guys, you have got to getthis.
It is, it is rich, it is lovely, it is funny, it is authentic,
(34:26):
and I know so many of you havestruggled with a lot of the
things that we're talking about,because we're all about
resilient aging here.
You want to age resiliently.
Grab this book and no,heather's not paying me to say
this.
It's wonderful, heather, it'swonderful, it's wonderful, thank
you.
Thank you for putting this out.
(34:47):
It's going to bless people,yeah, so is there anything more
besides my little monologuethere about what you would like
to tell people about, gratefully?
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Aging.
Yeah, you know, it was ajourney for me, right?
And I say that with every book,right, I feel like every book
God takes me on a journey andfor me, this was my journey into
this season of aging and reallyquestioning like, wow, like
there's a lot of change comingright and change whoo, that's
(35:20):
hard.
That's never been my favoritething.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
Yeah, I think we're done.
I don't think turning 50 meansthat we're done changing.
I think there's more to come.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
Right, and I had a woman I think it was on my show
I, you know, maybe I was on hershow and she said I don't
remember, but it was this weekand she said that she heard the
statistic that women will changebra sizes seven times over the
course of their life and Ithought that was like hilarious.
And then I was like, oh yeah,I'm probably on like number five
, so maybe I'm gonna beat thatseven average, but I you know
(35:52):
there's more change coming andso what does it look like to not
face it, like culture tells usto face it?
Like freak out, you know, panicor just be angry about it.
I don't.
I love the holderness family.
I think that they do hilariousvideos.
I don't know if you know whothey are, kim and pen.
They they do funny parodyvideos.
(36:14):
He, yeah, she just did one.
She did one on perimenopause,menopause yes, and it was
hilarious, right.
Yes, and she, and she said atthe end she kind of like rambles
about it she said her husbandwrote it in like four seconds.
He like knew all her symptoms.
But I think the more we cantalk about this, right, and
(36:36):
that's why you're doing suchgreat work talking about this
Like we don't hear it enoughthat the change is normal and
that we'll be okay through thechange, all we hear is be
prepared.
The worst of the end is coming.
You know, fight it, fight it,fight it Right.
And so I don't know.
(36:57):
I just hope that this book is aresource that will help us
embrace it might be too strongof a term for some, but will
help us walk through it knowingwe're not alone and that it's
normal and we're okay.
Speaker 2 (37:11):
Right, right, maybe be content.
Right with it, right, yeah, no,that's great.
Okay, heather, I've got somequestions.
I asked all my guests and Ihave to admit I don't remember
that.
Your answer to the first one.
Speaker 1 (37:23):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (37:24):
Yep, you did ask it before I did.
Okay, I'm so sorry, I don'tremember that.
Your answer to the first one.
Okay, yes, yep, you did ask itbefore.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
I did.
Okay, I'm so sorry I don'tremember that Season nine was a
long time ago by the way we'reon season 20.
Speaker 2 (37:33):
I get it Okay, so you know the question.
I love learning about people'stattoos.
I don't have one, but what Ifound is when people get a
tattoo, they often do it withpurpose or meaning.
So do you have any tattoos?
And if so, what is it?
And if you?
But if you had to get one andyou don't have one, but you had
to get one what would it be andwhere would it go?
Speaker 1 (37:53):
Yeah, so if I do not have any and if I had to get one
, I think I might show thisexact same answer.
So hopefully I'm beingconsistent.
My husband and I talked aboutit.
I think the Duck Dynasty peopledid this, so it was an original
idea getting wedding ringtattoos, you know, because it
would be easier to work out.
Yes, you didn't have to wearyour ring, so that's that's
(38:14):
probably the only place in mybody that I would not be as
scared, although I don't know,fingers are kind of sensitive,
aren't they?
I like the whole concept ofgetting a tattoo scares me a
little bit.
I'll be honest, I don't likepain.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
I like that idea.
It's funny.
I will spend a lot of my Sundaymornings.
I get up early, I go to thetrack, I do a track workout and
then I go to church and oftenthere is a gentleman there.
The only thing I know about himis his name is Kevin, because
I'm a weird person.
When I see someone more thanabout two times I'm like hey, I
(38:47):
see you, I haven't met you.
My name is Amy, so all I knowis his name is Kevin, and I'm
often there by myself, and he'soften there by himself and and I
.
It occurred to me that I take myrings off when I sleep, when I
go to bed, and I don't put themback on until I shower.
And I thought, oh man, I hopehe's not hitting on him.
Oh, what's your name?
Tattoo wedding ring wouldprobably be good.
(39:08):
I'm not being flirtatious, butI'm being friendly and you know
things are received a lotdifferently.
That would probably be helpful.
Okay, all right, heather, tellpeople how they can connect with
you and where, however, youwant to do that, and then where
they can buy the book AgingGratefully.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Yeah, so you can connect with me at
improvebodyimagecom.
My podcast is called Comparedto who, but my courses and my
coaching and really informationabout all of my books and any
like bonuses and such are atimprovebodyimagecom and then the
book is published by Our DailyBread so you can actually go to
(39:49):
them if you're already.
You know part.
A lot of people get the OurDaily Bread devotionals.
If you're already on their list, you'll probably start getting
information about this book soon.
But you can get it on Amazonand everywhere books are sold.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
All right, that sounds good.
Okay, do you have a meaningfulBible verse that you would like
to share?
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Oh, there's so many meaningful Bible verses.
You know I always talk aboutJonah 2.8.
Those who pay attention to vainidols forsake all hope of
steadfast love.
And it's a verse that you knowspoken as Jonah's in the belly
of the whale, so he's kind ofalready had his come to Jesus
(40:30):
moment, if you will.
And to me this is just areminder that, oh, when I get so
caught up in, oh, I wish Ilooked different.
Oh, I wish I didn't have somany forehead wrinkles, oh, I
wish my stomach looked different.
Right, it's no, no, no, no.
No.
Steadfast love comes from thefather.
I'm not earning it right, andas I chase the lies of these
(40:56):
idols, I'm actually gettingfurther from him rather than
getting closer to him.
And if the one thing I trulydesire is that love, that
unconditional love, chasingthese idols aren't going to get
me any closer to it.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
Yeah, amen, so good, okay, you get the last word.
What is the one simple thingthat you would like us to
remember, big or small?
Just a little nugget to hold onto as we go through our aging
process.
Speaker 1 (41:24):
Yeah, aging is natural and God's not surprised
by it.
You have not aged out ofrelevance.
Speaker 2 (41:35):
So good.
Okay, that is all for today.
Go out there and have a gracedday.
Thanks for listening today.
If this episode was valuable toyou, could you do one of two
things that are enormouslyvaluable to me but super simple
for you?
Number one just share this witha friend.
Super simple.
Number two provide a rating andreview, particularly if you
(41:58):
listen in Apple podcasts.
This is super valuable for me.
Also, if you haven't yetsubscribed to my monthly journal
, why not?
I send it out twice a month andit is a private fun space for
me to share some of my favoritefoods and recipes, movements,
books, sermons and more.
You never know what you'regoing to get, but I promise it
(42:19):
will add value to your day.
You can sign up atgracedhealthcom slash monthly
dash updates and, of course, thelink is in the show notes.
Thanks again for listening andI'll see you next time.
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