Learn How To Master Stage Presence and Own the Room
You’ve seen him in Ozark, The Vampire Diaries, and Stranger Things—but today, Brian LaFontaine isn’t here to play a role. He’s here to reveal what happens when the lights go down, the script fades, and you’re left with the one character you can’t escape: yourself.
In this candid and soul-stirring episode of GRASP Confidence, Brian sits down with host Tara LaFon Gooch to go far beyond the glitz of Hollywood and the world of performance. Together, they explore what it really means to stop performing—for others, for approval, for perfection—and to begin showing up in full alignment with your truest self.
Brian is a celebrated actor and voiceover artist with a career spanning decades, but his real mission lives behind the scenes: to help others see that confidence isn’t about charisma or stage time, it’s about integrity with self. It’s about rewriting your inner narrative, owning your story, and standing grounded in who you are, even when no one’s watching.
This episode is a masterclass in radical authenticity, quiet courage, and the power of presence. If you’ve ever struggled with self-doubt, imposter syndrome, or the pressure to be who the world expects you to be—this conversation will speak directly to your soul.
Together, we unpack:
🎭 How to rewrite your story when the script no longer fits
🎤 The surprising truth about stage presence and confidence—on and off camera
🧠 What it takes to quiet the inner critic and own every room
💬 Why storytelling and vulnerability are your greatest leadership tools
Whether you’re a speaker, leader, or creator—this conversation will remind you that the role of a lifetime is the one only you can play.
If you’ve ever felt stuck, unseen, or like you’re living someone else’s story, this episode is your invitation to reclaim your voice and step fully into your purpose.
Episode Transcript
Perfection. Brian, welcome to the show. Hi. Wow, that is an amazing opening and introduction. I mean, who wrote that? I didn't send you that. It was me. I'm a big fan. I'm a big fan, Brian. I love that. Do that for me all the time. You can steal it. Absolutely. It's happening. Thanks for having me. Well, you know, you and I , we met each other.
I said, what are the odds? No, it, I felt the same way. I was like, what? You're like this person's copying my name? Yeah. Well, as you, you could probably imagine, I've been asked that it's questioned a number of times over the course of my career if my last name is a stage name. Ah, that was in a stage name, and I'm like, I'm not that smart to come up with something like that.
Been working for me so far. Yeah, that's right. I love that. Well, I, you know, I wanted to bring you on this show today because I was just so thoroughly impressed with I. The way you coached speakers, and it's so interesting because we, we have completely different, you know, approaches and things like that, but I saw, you know, the way you coached people and it was just transformative.
They were new to this. And a lot of them hadn't really spoken on stages that much, so I can't imagine how hard that must have been. But you made it look so easy. Well, I mean, you know, to my advantage, I have been working with, with inexperienced performers for years, and that's the goal ultimately is to get them to that point where they can give a performance.
To try and give them a performance that they can go and use in the audition, or actually that we record in that audition within that half an hour timeframe. It gives them at least an opportunity to be considered. So I've had to learn how to work really, really quickly and be able to communicate a kind of a short hearing sort of way.
And that's, I was trying to lead them over the, you know, the following three months. And, you know, I feel that we were fairly successful in helping them get there. Yeah. It, that's. That is such a, a beautiful quality to be able to see the, it's the diamond in the rough, right? To see past the lack of training, the lack of knowhow, the lack of just performance.
Mm-hmm. Right. And I like to see someone's story and then it's like, you know what? It could be with just some refinement, right? Yes. It's so beautiful to take somebody on that journey. So, you know, I wanna talk a little bit about you as well because you know your opening set a lot, right? You've been involved in all of these campaigns in huge companies from Coca-Cola at to Ford on TV in the Ozark and Stranger Things like.
As a kid. Uh, and I was, you know, and I was a fairly outgoing and, and, you know, I'll say popular kid, meaning that I had friends. Now I wasn't this introvert who was just lowly and quiet and by himself, but at the same time, you know, I wasn't, I wasn't the guy who was like, everybody back up. Watch me. Um, so I had just as much, I, I had just as many problems with, you know, experiencing stage fright and, um.
So, uh, so it was, it was 1976, it was the year of the bicentennial, and I was in kindergarten at the time. Our elementary school did a whole like bicentennial production and I was Paul Revere and I had to deliver a like one page speech to the entire student body and staff and everybody there, and I nailed it like word for word.
Um, but it's just something that's built up over time. I, you know, I started doing standup comedy when I was 20 years old. And there, that's the scariest form of public speaking and performing that you could ever do. I don't care what anybody says. I'll argue with you all day long. Because, you know, you go out there with one objective and one objective only, and that's to make people laugh.
Go, all right, how can I make this better? Because, um, standup led me into, into acting and I fell in love with acting. It was something that I'd always wanted to do since I was a child. Um, and I never thought that it was a reality to try and pursue it. So when I finally got the chance to pursue it after I graduated from college, it turned out that I kind of, had a knack for acting and at the same time, I had a love for it. I had a passion for it, so that's only gonna help. Um, I wasn't afraid to get on stage and tell a story when someone gave me the story to tell, you know, it's obviously much more vulnerable for you to share your own story.
And that's one of those things that just kind of happened over time, where I, I had to realize that it was about me sharing more of myself. And knowing that that was the greatest thing that I had to offer was just me. My take on things, my, the way that I thought about things, how I looked at certain situations, how I felt in certain situations, and letting the audience truly see that most authentic version of me, because that's the only thing that I could bring to the work that would separate, separate me from every other actor who was trying to get that same job.
You know, the ones who were probably the superstars and the celebrities. But that's just something that I had to learn over the course of my career, and it's transferred into so many other aspects. Um, so that's why it made so much sense when I started working with people in public speaking. You know, to me there's no difference between when you take the stage as a keynote speaker and me taking the stage in a play or, you know, auditioning or be, you know, on set doing a scene from a movie.
So how are you going to differentiate yourself? How are you going to show up, right compared to everyone else? If we don't distinct ourselves and find a way to, you know, niche down and, you know, make a brand of one essentially. Mm-hmm. Right. Yes. You're going to continue to be overlooked, so it's really important in acting and speaking and otherwise that even if you're just applying to a job, there's jobs at Microsoft right now that I'm sure have 5,000 applicants, right.
Yes, yes. Especially in this time, like, you know, here you and I are in two different locations and we are both speaking and we have this medium, we have this platform. This is accessible to everybody else in the world right now too. So if everybody's speaking, if everybody's got a platform and trying to use it in some way, then again, like you said, what's gonna separate you from everybody else to try and stand out?
A lot of people are practicing authenticity or attempting to practice authenticity. But with all due respect, a lot of people still don't know how to be authentic. So there. I feel like they're trying to practice something that they don't quite grasp yet. Um, and it, it's one of the things that I've, I've absolutely realized, uh, on this exploration in public speaking and as a public speaking coach, is that my 30 plus years as an actor has been steeped in vulnerability and authenticity.
A hundred percent. I could not agree with you more. You know, especially in this age of ai right Now, when, you know, you look at somebody's profile on social media, are they even a real person? Right? Because there's a whole industry booming right now for just that. That's crazy. And it is crazy to me. And, um, you know, you look and you compare yourself, you know, and you and I were talking offline before this show started.
What do I align myself with? Right? What's important to me, right? These. Foundational questions I feel often get overlooked again. You know, I think about entrepreneurship especially, uh, we're drawn to shiny things a lot, right? The latest system or gadget or program or whatever. But we don't do the foundational elements first.
While I, I don't think that there's anything wrong in wanting those things or being attracted to them. Using those things as the definition of who you are or sort of as the, you know, this, there's attachment to it, that, that, um, is part of your identification then? Yeah, because I mean, well, one, it's an outside source.
Hmm. You know, um, yeah. Being clear on who you are for sure, but also, you know, being willing to share that with someone. You know, I, to me that's the. That's the overwhelming sort of crux is that you can, you can be clear on who you are, but if you keep it to yourself Mm. And it doesn't make any difference.
Um, you know, I know we tend to talk about vulnerability being seen as weakness, but I've never ever experienced that before in my life, ever. Um, you wanna go back to the, the whole TEDx experience. The reason also why. I took to working with, with all these women, you know, so passionately is because one, you know as well as I do, stepping on that stage is one of the most vulnerable things that you can do, stepping in front of an audience.
(00:22):
And for me, that's all I need to give you to, just to give you a chance to be like, tell me more. I know you're scared. I know you're freaking out right now, but you, you're, you're, you're sharing this with me for a reason. You stepped up to this for a reason and I wanna hear more. Absolutely. Yeah. I think of it as a responsibility that we have, you know, if you have a story that can change lives or even better yet, save them.
The fear of rejection. The fear, fear of being ostracized or not understood. But what I have found is the exact opposite that happens, right? I had way more opportunities come to me afterwards. Um, I went from being afraid to empowered. Mm-hmm. And because of all of these things, I could really help people.
Now, this was 30 years in the making. That means I had a social responsibility to share that message because it want, it literally helps someone. You can, there's 500 something comments there, but if you go towards the bottom, that comment is there, and that to me says exactly why I do what I do and why I shared what I shared.
The ripple effect and you have no idea what these other things are creating exactly what you're talking about. I mean, to me that's, that's the ball game that's worth the price of admission right there. You know, I talk about it when I do give talks and run workshops. It's, you know, if, if I can just, and it's as cliche and as cheesy as it sounds, it's like if I can just have, reach one person or make an effect, uh, have an effect on one person.
Uh. One of the examples that I can share with you is that I spoke to, uh, a coaching group earlier in the year, or back in the fall I think it was. And, um, the guy who was running the groups, good friend of mine, really nice guy. Mm-hmm. And it was all through Zoom, it was all virtual. And he wanted me to come on and, you know, talk about public speaking and do a little workshop and he had seven people on the entire call and four of them had their cameras off.
And I was like, yes. Thank you for that reminder. And I ended up doing it as if I was talking to a Ruth. Yep. Because you have no idea who's gonna see it, even if it's one person that one person showed up to hear what I had to say. And if they can get something from, you know, my expertise or my experience, then it doesn't matter if it's one person or a thousand people.
I love that. I highly recommend Brian as a speech coach. Guys, I did not walk on the TEDx stage by myself. I had a coach as well, and there's nothing wrong with it. It doesn't mean that you're not a great speaker. In fact, the best speakers have coaches and a lot of events don't even hire speakers if they don't have coaches.
It's so much easier and more proactive approach to hire somebody who is an expert like Brian. So highly recommend. Brian, thank you so much for being a guest on today's episode of Grasp Competence Podcast. And thank you to everyone who tuned in today. Guys, don't forget to like, share, subscribe, and leave a review and let me know your favorite takeaway from Brian.
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