Episode 90 - The Temu Zion

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The hosts dive straight into the deep end with a spirited discussion about vodka shots gone wrong, complete with tipsy tales and regrets. Abish, fueled by a potent mix of energy and ethanol, sets the tone for an episode that’s equal parts chaos and catharsis. The spotlight shifts to the cocktail of the episode, "The Unrepentant Sinner", inspired by D&C 64—a scripture on forgiveness where Joseph Smith conveniently absolves himself of accountability. As the crew reminisces about tithing, bishops, and missions, they craft a bittersweet mix of humor and introspection, blending their shared ex-Mormon experiences with sharp wit. Abigail then details her holiday loot—four sweaters, three featuring her cats—and her unwavering devotion to them. The standout? Abigail's “soup slut” sweater, which becomes the star of a misadventure involving an ill-fated soup craving. Her punchline, “Read my sweater, bitch,” delivers the perfect segue into the next segment after a whirlwind of laughter and tangents about holiday absurdities.

Scriptures: [00:26:47]

aaaAAAaaa takes the lead, opening with a round of shots before diving into D&C 64, where forgiveness is less divine grace and more "do as I say, not as I do." The segment peaks with a parody of the section as a modern Elon Musk Twitter manifesto, portraying Musk—accurately—as a self-serving tech prophet. Interweaving Rick and Morty references, generational digs, and power dynamics, the hosts deconstruct Joseph Smith’s leadership with razor-sharp humor, leaving listeners both entertained and unnerved.

Church Teachings: [00:45:02]

Abish opens with a comedic riff on the baffling bathroom layout of their recording space, setting the stage for a critique of Jeffrey R. Holland’s The Ministry of Reconciliation. The group examines the harm of rigid church practices through the story of a man estranged over a tithing dispute, segueing into broader frustrations with prophetic authority and institutional failures. From generational critiques (hello, boomers) to tangents about Disney remakes, this segment artfully balances biting humor with pointed reflections.

History: [01:19:24]

Abigail shines a light on Ezra Booth, Mormonism’s OG whistleblower, whose nine scathing letters dismantled Joseph Smith’s credibility. From failed miracles to a "City of Zion" that was more dirt than divine, Booth’s accounts blend skepticism with wit. The segment skewers everything from Joseph Smith’s fish-in-a-bucket science to bungled missionary work among Native Americans, offering a hilariously critical view of early church history. Abigail’s retelling of the infamous canoe debacle—featuring petty spats and reluctant apologies—underscores the chaos and dysfunction beneath Mormonism’s early promises.

The episode wraps with a nod to Ezra Booth’s boldness in exposing early Mormonism’s contradictions, despite personal cost. Abigail marvels at his brief but eventful tenure as a church member, leaving listeners with a blend of admiration and hilarity. As the crew clinks glasses one last time, they toast to Booth, badass sweaters, and the beauty of calling out absurdity when you see it.

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