Episode 94 - Snippedy-Snip, Boys!

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Abish returns from a birthday-induced existential crisis, recounting a wild Vegas weekend that ended in illness and questionable cold-medicine choices. The hosts unveil this week’s cocktail, the *Circum-sip-sion*, a margarita monstrosity featuring penis-shaped novelties and optional Baja Blast. 

Shoutouts go to listener Emma, whose fan mail affirms their sacred duty of irreverence. Abish then raves (and cries) about *The Wild Robot*, pondering love, motherhood, and the emotional toll of animated films. 

Scriptures: [00:14:14]
Moroni breaks down D&C 73–75 with his usual mix of skepticism and sass: 
- D&C 73 – Joseph Smith’s unfinished “director’s cut” of the Bible. 
- D&C 74 – Baptism replaces circumcision, sparking deep questions like, “Why was God so obsessed with foreskins?” 
- D&C 75 – Missionaries get promised blessings, but modern ones just get Venmo requests. 

Bonus: An AI-generated summary in the voice of *Parks and Rec*’s Tynnyfer declares baptism *in*, foreskin *out*, and missionary work *legendary*. 

Church Teachings: [00:30:44]
aaaAAAaaa leads an off-the-rails discussion featuring: 
- **Infant Baptism** – Conveniently revealed as unnecessary, just like Joseph Smith’s other doctrinal PR moves. 
- **Foreskin Fixations** – If God wanted it gone, why put it there? Religious micromanagement gets roasted. 
- **Mixed-Faith Guilt Trips** – The Church expects believers to “save” their apostate family members, fueling pressure and guilt. 

A surprising dive into grief, loss, and the sometimes frustrating way faith communities process tragedy brings depth (and dark humor). 

History: [00:58:44]
Abigail traces circumcision’s history from ancient Egypt to Victorian-era pseudoscience to Utah’s cultural persistence, despite no official LDS mandate.  
- Greeks and Romans thought it was weird.  
- Paul said, “Yeah, let’s not.”  
- 19th-century doctors thought it prevented *self-love*.  
- America, for some reason, still won’t let it go.  

The hosts question double standards on bodily autonomy, poke fun at medical advancements, and marvel at Mormonism’s selective adherence to Old Testament laws.  

The episode wraps up with gratitude, self-deprecation, and a promise of more sacrilegious cocktails next week. Stay hydrated—preferably with something stronger than the *Circum-sip-sion*.

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