Have you ever noticed someone quickly moving into a new relationship after their previous one ended – or perhaps even before it officially concluded? That behavior has a name: monkey branching.
In this heartfelt and honest conversation, DJ Mikey D and DJ Sophia Grace unpack the complex phenomenon of monkey branching – the relationship pattern where someone secures their next romantic partner before letting go of their current one. Through personal stories and psychological insights, we explore why people engage in this behavior, from fear of loneliness to boredom or even as a defense mechanism against painful breakups.
The discussion doesn't shy away from difficult truths. DJ Mikey D courageously shares his own experience with his ex-wife's pattern of relationship sabotage and emotional branching, illustrating the real-world impact this behavior can have on families and trust. Meanwhile, DJ Sophia Grace offers compassionate analysis of both sides – examining how monkey branching damages the person being left behind while also creating unhealthy patterns for the person doing the branching.
What makes this episode particularly valuable is its balance of understanding and accountability. We acknowledge the very human fears that drive this behavior while emphasizing that honesty and direct communication typically create less pain in the long run. The conversation offers practical wisdom for anyone who recognizes these patterns in their own relationships or has been on the receiving end of a partner who's emotionally moved on before officially ending things.
Join us for this thought-provoking episode of the Love Lounge that will transform how you think about relationship transitions. Whether you're currently in a relationship, healing from a breakup, or simply interested in understanding human connection better, there's something here for you. Check out greatdayradio.com for more episodes that get real about matters of the heart!
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Episode Transcript
You are listening to the.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
People.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Station on GreatDayRadiocom.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Welcome Great Day Radio fan and welcome to the
Love Lounge, the podcast episodewhere we dive into the highs,
lows and everything in betweenof relationships.
I'm DJ Mikey D.
Speaker 3 (00:14):
And I'm DJ DeMarie For this episode.
We're talking about aphenomenon that's gaining a lot
of attention called monkeybranching.
Ever heard of it?
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Absolutely.
It's that idea of jumping fromone relationship to another
before ending the first.
It is kind of like how monkeysswinging from branch to branch
in the jungle.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
Exactly, but it's not just a cute metaphor.
It carries some pretty heavyemotional implications.
Let's unpack what monkeybranching really means and why
people do it.
Before we kick off theconversation, I would like to
give a big shout out to our newTikTok and Instagram friends.
A big shout out to DeeDeeFletcher from Seattle Washington
, nancy Thompson on TikTokauthor and writer, albert Loftus
(00:56):
on TikTok, tiara on TikTok andall new friends that joined our
network recently.
If you have a shout out orThank you for your love and
support.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
So DJ D.
For our listeners who might notbe familiar, how would you
define monkey branching?
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Well, it's when someone in a relationship starts
to look for a new partnerbefore fully ending their
current one.
It's like they're branching outto see what's next, while still
holding on to the currentrelationship.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Right.
So it's kind of a preemptivemove.
People are often seekingsecurity or validation from the
next relationship before theyactually leave the old one.
It is very similar to how Idescribed my relationship with
my ex-wife when we were talkingoffline.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
And it's typically driven by fears of loneliness,
falling out of love or even lowself-esteem.
They don't want to feel singleor alone for too long.
Do you mind briefly explainingwhat we talked about?
Speaker 2 (02:00):
Sure, I won't get too much into the topic for sake of
time.
My ex-wife, prior to my sonbeing born, attempted to leave
the relationship then again justbefore the pandemic, and one
other time before finally goingthrough with the divorce While I
was away finishing grad schoolin Washington, she had what she
describes as an emotionalrelationship.
In her words, he was giving herthe attention that she needed
that I was not giving her.
(02:21):
Again, not going to get toochatty about it, I would
encourage you to visitgreatdayradiocom for more
in-depth discussion on thistopic.
Blowing story short, after muchtime apart since the
announcement of the divorce, Irealized that she has a pattern.
For example, when arelationship gets serious, she
self-sabotages the relationshipby leaving or branching out.
In our case, once we weremarried, the sabotage still
(02:43):
existed.
I believe now that she has beeninvolved in online dating apps
and testing the waters.
However, because ofcircumstance, she never 100%
committed to those relationships, but instead strung me along.
There are at least two provenfacts.
She ventured outside themarriage.
We are both guilty of doing so.
However, when a one-timeincident occurred on my end, I
(03:04):
knew that we needed intervention.
I chose family and showed upthere after hoping we can get
past our issues.
Okay, back to what you stated.
You bring up an interestingcase in point to what I just
mentioned about my relationship.
What motivates someone tomonkey branch?
Was it always malicious?
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Thank you, Mikey D, for sharing your viewpoint in
relations to your recent divorce.
To answer your question, notnecessarily.
Sometimes it's about fear ofbeing alone.
Other times it's about boredomor seeking excitement.
Some people might be afraid toface the ending of a
relationship and do it graduallyinstead.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
It's also worth noting.
For some, it's a defensemechanism, avoiding the pain of
a breakup by having someone elselined up first.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
Exactly, but of course that comes with its own
set of emotional consequencesfor everyone involved,
especially if kids are involved.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
From what you have learned.
What kind of impact does monkeybranching have on the
relationships involved?
Speaker 3 (03:58):
It's often pretty damaging.
The person being left can feelbetrayed or heartbroken because
they might find out the truthlater on.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Ain't that the truth?
And the person doing the monkeybranching?
They might feel guilty orjustify their actions, but it
usually erodes trust over time.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
Trust is the foundation of any relationship.
Once it's broken, it's tough torebuild.
Plus, if someone's constantlymonkey branching, they might
struggle with commitment overall.
That's a good question Arethere's constantly monkey
branching?
Speaker 2 (04:25):
they might struggle with commitment overall.
That's a good question.
Are there situations wheremonkey branching could be seen
as justified or understandable?
Speaker 3 (04:31):
Some argue that if a relationship is truly toxic or
beyond repair, ending it bygradually leaving may be a
softer approach, but even then,honesty is usually the better
path.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
True Deceiving someone or leaving while still
emotionally involved can createmore pain, even if it's less
sudden.
Speaker 3 (04:47):
It's a tricky balance .
Ultimately, open communicationand honesty tend to be healthier
strategies.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
So what can listeners take away?
Be mindful of the motivationsbehind your actions.
Are you signaling genuinereadiness to move on, or are you
just avoiding hard feelings?
Speaker 3 (05:01):
And for those on the receiving end if you suspect
someone's engaging in monkeybranching, remember that your
worth isn't defined by someoneelse's choices.
Speaker 2 (05:10):
Great advice.
Thanks for tuning into the LoveLounge.
Remember healthy relationshipsare rooted in honesty, trust and
respect.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
Until next time, stay genuine, stay loving For more
relationship talk.
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