August 30, 2022 • 37 mins
On today’s episode I have the honor and privilege of speaking with Brian Bogert founder of the Brian Bogert Companies.
Brian is a human behavior and performance coach, motivational speaker, and business strategist who has change the lives of thousands with his revolutionary coaching programs.
Brian starts today’s conversation by sharing with us the horrific accident that he suffered as a child and then will explain how he was determined not to let that tragic moment define who he would become as an adult.
Brian will then relate how he became a passionate public speaker who believes in helping growth-minded individuals become the best version of themselves by leveraging radical authenticity and awareness to create the intentional life they’ve been dreaming of but have struggled to create on their own.
Later we’ll unpack his revolutionary strategy of embracing pain to avoid suffering—and how this has helped individuals, groups and entire companies break beyond their normal to achieve the success in life and business that they’ve always wanted.
And we will finish our conversation when Brian shares his wisdom and insight so that you too can learn how to develop the grit and determination needed to persevere through the toughest of challenges.
This is an episode you truly do not want to miss.
Be sure to check out the show notes after the episode to learn more about Brian and his message.
The Show Notes
Brian Bogert Companies Website
https://brianbogert.com/
Union Home Plus helps union members save money when they buy, sell, or finance their home.
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Brian Bogert (00:00):
I am Brian Bogert with the Brian Bogert companies
(00:02):
and I have Grit.
Joe Cadwell (00:12):
Joe Cadwell, the writer, producer and host of the
show and on today's episode, Ihave the honor and privilege of
speaking with Brian Gilbert,founder of the Bryan motor
companies. Brian is a humanbehavior and performance coach,
motivational speaker andbusiness strategist who has
changed the lives of 1000s. Withhis revolutionary coaching
programs. Brian starts today'sconversation by sharing with us
(00:34):
the horrific accident that hesuffered as a child that he will
explain how he was determinednot to let that tragic moment
define who we become as anadult. Brian will then relate
how we became a passionatepublic speaker who believes in
helping growth mindedindividuals become the best
version of themselves byleveraging radical authenticity
and awareness to create theintentional life they've been
dreaming of, but have struggledto create on their own. Later on
(00:58):
pack is revolutionary strategyof embracing pain to avoid
suffering, and how this hashelped individuals groups and
entire companies break beyondtheir normal to achieve the
success in life and businessthat they've always wanted. And
we'll finish our conversationwhen Brian shares his wisdom and
insight so that you too canlearn how to develop the grit
and determination needed topersevere through the toughest
(01:19):
of challenges. Be sure to checkout the show notes after the
episode to learn more aboutBrian and his message. And now
onto the show. Brian Berger,
Brian Bogert (01:31):
welcome to the show. I'm happy to be here,
brother.
Joe Cadwell (01:34):
Happy to have you on the show today, Brian, I've
really become a big fan of yourssince we first connected on
LinkedIn. Not that long ago,I've done some background
research on you looked at yourYouTube videos, visited your
website listened to some otherpodcasts. But man, you have got
a great message for mylisteners. And I'm hoping that
you can start off by telling usa little bit about Brian Bovard
(01:57):
is
Brian Bogert (01:58):
absolutely so I'm gonna I'm gonna ask you and the
listeners to close your eyes forjust a second unless you're
driving, of course, because thatthat will backfire. I'm sure.
And I'll tell you when to reopenthem. I want you to imagine
going to a store. Having asuccessful shopping trip walking
back out to your car, thinkingyou're heading on with your day.
And you turn your head and see atruck barreling 40 miles an hour
(02:19):
right at you with no time toreact. Go ahead and open your
eyes. That's where this portionof my story begins. My mom, my
brother and I went to our localWalmart to get a one inch paint
brush. And as we're headed tothe car, I mean spending a
couple of minutes with me, youcan probably tell I've got an
energy. And so it wasn't asurprise to her that I was the
first one there, I wanted to gethome and put that one in paint
brush to use. But this is backin the days before we had key
fobs. And so I got to the carfirst but I had to wait for him
(02:41):
to physically catch up the keyin the door and turn it so that
we can get on with our way. Andas we're standing there, a truck
pulls up in front of the store,driver middle passenger get out
and the passenger all the way tothe right feels the truck moving
backwards. So he did what anyone of us would do when He
screwed over to put his foot onbrake. But instead he hit the
gas combination of shock andforce threw him up on the
steering wheel up on thedashboard before you know it.
(03:02):
He's catapulting 40 miles anhour across the parking lot
right at us with no time toreact. Now we were in an end
spot so he goes over the medianup over the tree in the median
hits our car, knocks me over,runs over me diagonally tears my
spleen leaves a tire tracksgrowing my stomach and continues
on to completely severed my leftarm for my body. So there, my
(03:23):
mom and brother were havingwatched the entire thing. They
now see me laying on the groundon 115 degree day in Phoenix,
Arizona, and they look up andsee my arm 10 feet away.
Fortunately for me, my guardianangel also saw the whole thing
happened. There was a nurse thatwalked out of the store right
when this took place and she sawthe literal life and limb
scenario that was in front ofher. She rushed immediately into
action and came over and stoppedthe bleeding at the main wound
(03:45):
to save my life and instructedsome innocent bystanders to run
inside grab a cooler, get my armis within minutes to ultimately
save my limb. Had she not doneone or both of those things.
Joe, I either wouldn't be herewith you today, or I'd be here
with you today with a cleaned upstump. That's just the reality.
And I know that our listenersprobably weren't expecting it to
go through today, right? I'msure I'm sure they weren't. I
have a very unique story. AndI've learned that over time. But
(04:06):
what I've also realized overtime is that we all have unique
stories. What's important isthat we pause and become aware
of the lessons we can extractfrom those stories, and then
become intentional of how do weapply them in our lives. And we
all have the ability to do that.
We also all have the ability totap into the collective wisdom
of other people's stories toshorten our own curve to
learning. So I've got twoprimary stories I'll share with
you to kind of set the stage andthen we can take it wherever we
(04:28):
want to. The first is I learnednot to get stuck by what had
happened to me, but instead getmoved by what I could do with
it. And the second I didn'trealize until far later in life.
You see it 789 1011 12 years oldI was in the mix. I was the one
having the treatments done to methe surgeries done to me I was
gonna have to show up and dophysical therapy but I was also
being guided through theprocess. My parents However,
(04:48):
we're not in a fog, theunceasing medical treatments
years of physical therapy, andthe idea of seeing their son
grow up without the use of hisleft arm was a source of
Potential suffering, they werevery aware of all of it. And so
they did what they needed to do,to embrace the pains necessary
to ultimately strengthen andheal me to put in the work to
make sure that I'm getting thetreatments that I need to put in
(05:11):
the work around physicaltherapy, and to make sure that
they were in during all of thoseunceasing medical treatments for
my benefit. So whether or not itwas intentional, what they did
was ingrained in me andphilosophy and way of living,
which was to embrace pain, toavoid suffering. And it's these
concepts that I used to not onlybecome this unique injury, but
how my business partners and Iscaled our last business to 15
million within the span of adecade. And now how is human
(05:33):
behavior and performance coach,I flipped that on its head, to
help individuals and businessesjust like you, just like the
people listening become moreaware, more intentional, and who
they already are their mostauthentic selves. You see, I
believe that's when magichappens. And the door starts to
crack to perspective, motivationand direction. And that's when
people have a fighting chance ofhaving joy, freedom and
fulfillment enter into theirworld. And so that's why we are
(05:54):
on a mission to impact a billionlives by 2045. Because we can
reduce the level of suffering onthis planet allow joy, freedom
and fulfillment to enter intothis world, allow people to
stand on their own two feet,confident in who they are,
knowing the world's going toaccept them for who they are,
that brings us together, andwe're gonna have a lot more
beautiful place for my kids andmy grandkids to grow up. And
Joe Cadwell (06:15):
that sounds like a fantastic story, Brian, from a
very early age, you realize thatthe with every challenge comes
an opportunity for personalgrowth and, and betterment. And
you've taken your personalmission. And it sounds like you
applied it from what Iunderstand in the insurance
world for a while until you hadsort of a pivotal moment, not
that long ago, when you decidedto, to move out of insurance and
(06:38):
become a human, as you call it ahuman performance coach, and
what how did you actually cometo that? Understanding that
that's what you wanted to dowith your life.
Brian Bogert (06:48):
Yeah, so it starts a little while before the
transition. You know, aboutseven years ago, we became
parents, and the first sixmonths flew by like that. And
what I mean by that is, otherthan the first week I took off,
I missed the first six months ofmy kid's life. I'm not proud of
that, especially given the factthat my entire life I positioned
(07:09):
and said that everything I wasgonna do is for the benefit of
my family. But providing for myfamily just financially is only
part of the equation, I alsohave to have presence, I have to
have leadership, I have to havelove, I have to have connection.
And, you know, money can provideall those things. And so it was
the first time in my life that Ididn't have the mentors, the
wisdom on my own, or the peopleto be able to get the answers I
(07:31):
needed. So I went out to hire myown first coach. And ultimately,
within a month of working withhim, he said, Oh, are you gonna
be doing this? And I said, Whatare you talking about? He goes,
You need to be coaching, and youneed to be speaking
professionally. And I was like,Yay, whatever. I'm paying a lot
of money now to tell me howgreat I am. But tell me figure
out these other things. I saidI'd The last thing I need one
(07:51):
more thing under the plane, hegoes, Okay. Well, he trickled it
every month for about ninemonths. And he was telling me
what I needed to hear, not whatI wanted to hear. And he
ultimately was trying to showthat I've always built people
and built businesses. And I'vealways looked to provide
perspective, motivation anddirection to the world. And I've
been on stages for the last 30years just purely because I have
a unique story. But it's also asuccess story. And I can tell it
(08:15):
through the lens of allowingpeople to take those things away
with them those lessons away.
And so he's like, Brian, you'redoing this. Ultimately, the
universe sent me a big sign thatsaid he was right. I jumped in
with both feet. And I startedcoaching and speaking on a
regular and consistent basis, Ikept both my speaking and kept
both my coaching, just because Iwas so heavily invested
emotionally, physically,spiritually, mentally and
financially in the business thatwe built and scaled. And so I
(08:37):
just kind of kept it it was whatit was. Fast forward a little
bit, five years about summer2019, my wife and I went away.
We had one of those weekendswhere spiritually, mentally,
physically, emotionally,brother, like we were wanting,
right, like, it's just, we wereso connected. And as we're
driving back to pick up ourkids, after this phenomenal
weekend, my wife leans over inthe car and says, How would you
(08:59):
feel if you didn't have to gothe office on Monday morning?
And I was I get chills everytime I start to tell that part
because it just puts me rightback in that moment, I was
completely overtaken by fear.
And and I was like, that's apretty loaded question. Why
don't you tell me more. So shewent on to explain I had some
other health stuff that tookplace a few years prior, that
(09:20):
I'm good now. But she ultimatelysaid, I think you'd like this
last health thing. Let fearenter into your world in a way
that I've never seen youoperate. She said, I think
you've convinced yourself thatwe need the money. We need the
status, we need to financialsecurity we need to everything
that's been built as a result ofthe business. And she said but
I'm here to tell you we don't.
She said I don't care if we livein a cardboard box on the
corner. What I care about isthat we have 100% you and she
(09:41):
said whether you see it or not,you're dying a little bit inside
everyday you live in insurance.
And she said but I also knowthat over the last five years
when you've been coaching andspeaking that's what I really
think you're meant to do. Shesaid I think it barely scraping
the surface your potential, nordo I think you have any impact
on the world that you want. Andso she said there's nobody on
this planet I'd rather take abet on you Why don't we double
down on that bet, execute ourbuy, sell in the insurance
(10:03):
business and go see what we cando. And I had to spend the next
three months really sitting withthat I had to unpack and
understand my fear, I had tounpack and understand the
financial model and what thiswas going to look like. And I
got really conservative in doingthe seven year cash flow
projection, I had to really moredeeply unpack my own shame,
which I wasn't even aware of. Ihad until that that same year,
(10:26):
really 2018 2019 is when Istarted to realize how much
shame played a role in my life.
And I'd work through all thosethings. And it was September of
2019. But I communicated with myCEO and my business partners,
that I was gonna be executing myadvice on leaving at the end of
that fiscal year. And so, youknow, I had to apply a little
bit of regret minimizationtheory that Jeff Bezos
popularized, and I had to take astep back and recognize that I
could hit the easy button on thesure thing, because our business
(10:50):
was growing double digits yearover year and had been
consistently for a decade. Or Icould take a shot at seeing what
I could actually do. And what weknow with regret minimization
theory is that what peopleregret most in their lives, is
the things they didn't do, notthe things they tried and
failed. And so I take a chanceand and that's ultimately what
(11:10):
led me down that path.
Joe Cadwell (11:14):
It seems like Brian, you have a lot of things
there that are directlyrelatable to people that are in
the construction trades, themajority of the listeners of
Grit Northwest are obviouslyblue collar workers. And
starting off with the physicalchallenge. I mean, obviously,
you had a very, very significantsetback as far as your
physicality. And I know a lot ofour members are obviously very
(11:38):
physically capable, able to, toovercome the challenges of the
construction world, but thereare a lot of biases that are
placed against some barriers. Soyeah, that that they have to
overcome. We have a lot of womenin the trades. We have a lot of
minorities in the trades and alot of people that just there's
these unseen barriers that theyhave to overcome. And you talk
(11:58):
about, you know, theperseverance to push through
those what type of advice whenthings get down? And when you're
really, you know, feeling likeor speculating, is this really
the place for me? How do youhave a view, dug deep to find a
way to draw that inner strengthto continue through and push on?
Brian Bogert (12:15):
Yeah, so I think I have to start with helping
understand, like, where do theseexternal narratives come from?
And why do they impact us?
Because I think we have to startthere before we can talk about
how do we move through them? Youknow, I believe this is the case
in the world. And it's onlyfurther exemplified in certain
industries, right. And what Imean by this is, we are born as
the most bright, burning,authentic light we will ever be.
(12:39):
And then what happens, as wegrow as parents, teachers,
coaches, employers startlayering on all these things
about what the world is going toaccept, right, you should do
this, you should be that youshouldn't do this, you should be
that you should chase thisamount of money, you should
define success. This way, youshould chase the material
(12:59):
things. And the older we get,what starts to happen is all
these narratives just startgetting layered on top of us
until the fact that we actuallybelieve them. And we buy into
the external narrative, to thepoint that we also lose who we
are in the process, we lose whatwe want in the process, we lose
clarity on the things that areimportant to us in the process.
(13:21):
Because we're conditioned tofollow the path of external
success based on the how theworld defines it. Okay, so you
talked about these biases, thesebiases, or external narratives,
some biases can be true, purelyby demographics and numbers, you
start to see yes, there'spatterns that develop. But the
rule, right, that the ruledoesn't have to be just because
(13:43):
this is how our world is shapedthat that is what it's always
going to be. Right. So when youtalk about these biases around,
you know, females and minoritiesthat are in the trades, often
it's viewed as well. Okay,great. There's not a lot of
females in the trades. Does thatmean females can't exist in the
trades? Or you have to be ayoung male to operate here? And
the answer doesn't have to beyes to that. The other thing is,
(14:05):
I think there's a lot of peoplewho fall into certain roles,
jobs or positions, becauseeither they grew up that way, my
family's always been in thetrade. So of course, I've got to
go down the trades, right? Mydad, my grandpa, we've always
been a blue collar family. So Ihave to be a blue collar worker.
And not always is that true? Doyou have to let your past or the
(14:26):
patterns in your family orenvironment or community define
who you are in your future. AndI think that that's what
typically allows people to feelstuck. stymied in their own
efforts to fill their potentialis when they chase the external
narrative versus the internalone, which by the way, almost
all of us have done, becausethat's how the world conditions
(14:46):
us to operate. I talked aboutall these shoulds that the world
I want to say one thing realquick and then and we can talk a
little further on this talksabout these shoulds should is
inherently a shame based word.
because it automatically impliesthat whatever you're doing isn't
good enough. And so that's theother piece is if you're feeling
(15:08):
stuck, how many times have youheard somebody tell you, you
should be on the path thatyou're on. Or you should be
grateful for the role that youhave. Or you should be happy
about the fact that you've gotmoney and food on the table,
right? If you're miserable everysingle day, throw the shoulds
out the window, and start askingyourself, what could I or what
would I do, if I wasn't buyinginto the external narratives,
and I followed what I reallywant to do.
Joe Cadwell (15:30):
And following what you really want to do for having
that passion, having that desirethat you want to fulfill can
elevate you to the next higherlevel 100%. And so it's so
important for us as asprofessional carpenters or
trades people to recognize thatthat, you know, I have to
develop myself on so many otherlevels, as opposed to just being
(15:52):
able to do the work. And I thinkcommunication is a huge
component of that, becausecommunication is one of the
foundation foundational stonesof leadership. And I know you're
a professional public speakeryou before COVID, were on tour
quite a bit. Since COVID. Ithink you've found kind of a
niche market usingtelecommunication podcast,
(16:15):
obviously. And how important iscommunication, in your opinion,
to developing the person thatyou feel that you are meant to
be?
Brian Bogert (16:24):
Oh, I think communication is critical. I
think it's one of the absolutefoundational elements that's
required to not only developinto who you are, but to also
develop in a way that you canlead others. It's absolutely
essential. You know, I and I saycommunication in that how you
can articulate not just yourthought, but how you can
(16:45):
articulate your feelings. And Ithink internal communications
where it has to start because ifyou're not clear inside, how can
you ever be expected to be clearoutside? You know, Brene, Brown
has this, this beautiful saying,is that clear is kind, unclear
is unkind. That's all aboutcommunication. That's all about
where and how can I communicateeffectively, that's about
(17:07):
vulnerability. That's aboutauthenticity, vulnerability, and
authenticity are the glue thatbinds human connection. So if
you actually want to be a solidleader, you want to advance in
your trade. Right? You have tofocus on understanding and being
honest with yourself internally,and how you communicate, and
then constantly finding ways toimprove your level of
(17:28):
communication. And I believethis is true for anybody in any
trade in any role across theworld. What often gets in our
way are things that are not saidor are misinterpreted, which is
a lack of clear communication.
You know, I work withindividuals, often in a way that
allows them to grab what theythink is just out of their grasp
90% of the time, it's aboutcommunicating things that they
(17:51):
haven't communicated prior. Ihave a client right now that his
wife has commented in the lastthree months, that clear and
distinct difference in his levelof communication inside the
house and with her around hisfears, his scarcity, his issues,
the blocks within therelationship. And it just so
(18:12):
happens that it's also that lackof communication was holding him
back in the business that heowns, which is in real estate
development. Right. And hewasn't being clear with his
team's about the way that he wasoperating 90% of what we've
worked on over this period oftime, although it's not truly
this, it's the externalmanifestation of it is
communication. At the end of theday, it's vocalizing what you're
(18:33):
thinking and feeling in a waythat you are clear to other
people. So they understand yourperspective, and can better
communicate back with youthere's so that you can find the
common middle ground and moveforward. I think communication
is critical.
Joe Cadwell (18:47):
I think you nailed it. And I think my own personal
journey with communicationstarted about eight years ago,
in our organization, whichreally takes a lot of emphasis
to educate our members and takesa lot of pride in developing
leadership. And it was when Iwent to the journeymen
leadership program down in LasVegas, which is a four year four
(19:09):
day program where they impartupon you the history of our
organization and and again, workon your own personal
communication styles. And thenthat light bulb went off for me
at that time, because obviouslywe're communicating from from
the very early age, when we'rejust starting to cry, we want
something to then, you know,having these negotiations
between our childhood friendsand arguing over toys or who did
(19:33):
what and how they did. And thenthe communication though, is
brought upon in school, we learnhow to read, we learn how to
write, but we really don't put alot of emphasis on clear
communication and understandingthat yeah, we have we have two
ears and one mouth for a reason.
And that communication, there'sso much that is just built into
the listening and understandinghow, what other people are
(19:53):
saying not just hearing them,but actually understanding what
they're saying.
Brian Bogert (19:59):
Yeah, and I think there's a really important
distinction to that I want toclarify on you know, I think
what we realize and know intoday's world, but again, the
external narrative is told usthat only one can be accepted is
that we have intellectual andemotional narratives. Right? We
have thoughts, and we haveemotions, and very rarely do we,
as individuals connect thosetwo. And so communication is
also not just about being ableto vocalize and articulate what
(20:22):
are we thinking, but what are wefeeling because it's often those
triggers and that emotional sidethat doesn't get translated,
which keeps people frustrated,stuck, fearful scares, shamed
all of the above those emotionsthat we all somewhat understand,
the world has told us, let'sjust shove that stuff down, show
up and put a smile on our face,and let's go to business. But
the reality of it is, is there'salways something that's there,
(20:43):
I'll own one, this just happenedliterally this morning. I have
an associate that I work with.
She's young, she hasn't had awhole lot of jobs, there's been
interactions, but she worked invery toxic environments prior,
there was almost abuse from herboss in certain ways in the
language and how theycommunicated, which she's
internalized. Right, and shecarries it with her. Now, we had
(21:03):
an interaction over the weekend,she texted me on something, and
I responded back, not thinkingmuch more beyond it. But it
triggered her. And I didn'trealize that it triggered her
until we had our Monday morningmeeting yesterday. And I started
to see that something was off.
So I started to probe a littlebit and ask questions, she
started to pull back. I had toreally think through this last
(21:26):
night, because if she's not ableto communicate it, how can I
lead down a path so that I cangive her the permission in the
space to communicate or find thewords to figure out what it is.
So I sat with it. And I thoughtabout I was like, oh, maybe my
text triggered her shame and hertoxicity from her prior for her
prior work relationship. So Italked her about it today, I was
just on a zoom call with her for45 minutes, because I care about
(21:47):
her deeply. And I want her tounderstand like that sometimes
we miss communicate,particularly in written form.
And it's easy to like putnarratives emotionally and
intellectually around commentsthat might not have any intent
that was aligned with that. Butit was also miss received.
Because if we rely on text, it'sonly a small portion of how we
communicate. And so I had aconversation with her and unpack
this. And I led with that wholepiece through 45 minutes, that
(22:10):
was exactly the case, sheactually had told me she's like
I was triggered, I didn't havethe words to say, and I didn't
know if I'd be able tocommunicate that to you. And as
a result of my own conditioning,I was actually looking for
reasons to potentially bail onthis role, even though I really,
really want it.
Joe Cadwell (22:25):
And that's something that is so easily like
you say misinterpreted in a textin an email in written form,
because as we know, so muchcommunication is not the words
coming out of your mouth, butthe your facial expressions,
your mannerisms, your bodypositioning, so much of
communication is not actuallywhat's coming out. And to steal
a quote from Maya, Maya Angelou,you know, people don't
(22:46):
necessarily remember what yousay they remember how you make
them feel. That's right. Andthat is a, it's really hard to
express feeling via text.
Brian Bogert (22:56):
That's right.
Well, and here's the thing, 7%of our communication is in the
words that we choose 38% of ourcommunication is in the tone and
the cadence of our delivery. 55%of our communication is in our
nonverbal cues. So if you're onthe phone, you're only getting
45% of communication. If you'rein text or an email, you're
(23:17):
getting 7% of communication. Ifwe're here, right now, we're
getting as close to 100 as wecan get in a virtual world,
because I can see you I can seeyour micro expressions, I can
see your body language, but I'mstill only seeing a portion of
it. But 55% of our communicationis on our nonverbal cues. So
communication is unbelievablyimportant. But the medium with
which we communicate, dependingon the type of communication is
(23:39):
equally, if not more important.
Joe Cadwell (23:43):
So understanding how important communication is
Brian, understanding that we canget stuck in ruts occasionally,
professionally, personally,relationship wise, where would
someone turn to try to get outof these ruts? And who would
they they interact with in orderto help them along to get to the
next level?
Brian Bogert (24:04):
Yeah, so I think there's a variety of answers to
that. I'll keep it reallysimple. I'm a big believer that
the first person to turn to toget yourself out of anything is
yourself. And I know that soundsa little bit like coy when I
answered that, but I thinkthere's a lot of people who are
looking to be saved. There's alot of people that are looking
for a hero they're looking for,right what what, who can help
(24:26):
them get out of what they'redoing. And I think a lot of
people haven't done the owntheir own internal work strong
enough to have the foundation toreally be able to stand up on
their own two feet. So I alwaystell people to start with
themselves outside of that.
Because internally what we knowis that there's only so much
awareness we can gain, right? Sowe're going to have internal and
external self awareness. So whenyou start with yourself, it's to
ask yourself the questions like,you know, why am I stuck? What
(24:48):
am I feeling right now? What isthe root of it? Like really give
yourself the path to understandmaybe why you feel stuck, and
then only ask why questions to apoint and shift it to a what
question Which is okay, now thatI have this understanding of
myself and the situation I'm in,what can I do about it on a
future focus and perspective,objective perspective? What are
the conversations I can have?
(25:09):
What are the actions I can take?
Right? What are the ways I cankind of think through my
emotions, but I don't gettriggered on those same ways.
Once you've gone through that,or if you don't know how to do
that, you can still lookoutside. I'm still a big
believer, we have to do thatinternal work. And you'll hear
me say that always. But if youhave no idea where to start, I
would say look for people thatyou trust in your life. Look,
for a mentor, look for a guide,look for a friend, look for a
(25:32):
coach, I say, Coach last,because I think that 90% of
people aren't ready for a coach,start with all the free options
First, put in the work andfigure out what you can do. But
you know, a spouse can be areally good sounding board to
help you see blind spots, youknow, maybe they see very
clearly why you're stuck, andyou don't have clarity on it. A
mentor, someone who's maybewalked your path before might
(25:54):
have very relevant experience,not only in the situation,
you've been in the way you'refeeling the way that you can
understand. And so they cantypically provide advice, or
perspective on the ways tonavigate through it. You know,
even kids, depending on theirages, and the relationship you
have can be folks to help youget unstuck, right, my son and
my daughter, even though they'reonly seven, and almost six, have
(26:16):
given me moments of clarity, byme just putting myself in a
position that I can learn fromanybody. And so as long as we
can kind of trust and surrenderto the fact that we can learn,
and we can seek advice fromanyone in our life, then it's
really feeling alone, that keepsus stuck more than anything. And
the more we can kind of makethose connections, to be have a
level of trust and vulnerabilityto be able to grow and know that
(26:40):
you're trusted. And whatever youshare is being received
objectively and nonjudgmentally, then you can move
forward productively, I stillthink the internal work needs to
be done. But there's a lot ofpeople who can guide you.
Joe Cadwell (26:53):
So turn inward First, look for a solid mentor
and a mentor. mentorships arehuge in the apprenticeship
program. And we always encouragepeople to find a mentor that
that you get along with that,that you respect that
communicates well with you. Andthat truly cares about your
forward progression through theprogram and into the into the
trades. And that's a huge part.
And then also, as you said, youcan turn externally, and I know
(27:16):
the Brian booger companies,especially on YouTube have
burger bullets. And I was hopingyou could tell us a little bit
about Bogot's bullets.
Brian Bogert (27:27):
Yeah, so bogus bullets is something that we
started early. When the companystarted. And it went
consistently. I did a video aweek for about a year. And we
started doing them again about ayear ago. So we're on that same
weekly cadence we stopped for afew years because people who
didn't know me liked thecontent. Like the videos got
(27:49):
stuff from it, people who hadseen me speak live or who knew
me, always said, Brian, it'sjust not the same, right. And so
I've always committed to myselfthat even if I'm going to
potentially have a positiveimpact in somebody's life, if
it's not being delivered 100%authentic by me, then I would
rather have no impact than inauthentic impact. And so I pause
(28:10):
doing it for a while, whatbogans bullets is a three to
five minute topical video everysingle week, where we take an
abstract and esoteric thoughtprocess around a topic, just to
provide a different way forpeople to think or feel about
those types of things that arenot scripted, that are on the
fly, I get inspiration, I turnthe camera on, I talk for three
(28:31):
to five minutes, and then I sendit off to my content team. And I
typically don't watch them againafter they're out. So that's
where I'm at with it. It's justlike a free flowing thought. But
we have you know, a number ofsubscribers who love that every
single week, they you know, weput it out on social media. And
we also have a text list that wesend it out in bulk. So people
just have the direct link onYouTube. And that's just been a
really fun passion project. Youknow, when I when I told you
(28:53):
earlier that we're going to beimpacting a billion lives and by
2045 I'm very aware that99.99999999999% will never pay
us $1 And I'm very okay withthat. And so over its bullets is
an example of that, because weput out a lot of free content
just simply to provide help,perspective, motivation
direction and something to helpelevate and empower people to
(29:14):
stand on their own two feet andknow that they're not alone. And
so that's what it is. And I'mhappy that you were able to get
in there but yeah, I don't knowif you watched any of those
early episodes, you'll see theenergy and deliveries totally
different.
Joe Cadwell (29:24):
Yeah, you have some great ones on strength and
courage and how you share that.
How do I make an impact is a youknow, one that I watched I
thought it was especially goodwhat's holding you back? And
then he had one on marriagehacks. And you talked about it
early on, you know, the firstsix months of your child's life
you weren't there. And findingthat work life balance is was
especially difficult for you itsounds like as can be for so
(29:45):
many of our carpenters andtrades people because the work
tends to dictate, you know, whenand where we go, especially
myself as a commercial diver. IfI waited for work to find food
come close to my home I had tostarve to death. way early on,
so I chase the work for a good75 80% of my my career, I never
did have children. So I didn'tmiss that element of family
(30:07):
life. And I had a very patientunderstanding wife, I still do.
But yeah, that balance is verydifficult for a lot of people to
strike. And you are someone thatsaid, I cannot continue down
that road, and you had theability to change your sort of
destiny in regards to that. Iencourage so many of the
listeners right now to reallyevaluate what is important to
(30:28):
you and keeping those things inbalance. And I think, having
done some research with you,Brian, you had said you did not
want to be one of those peoplethat at age 40 After having a
divorce and losing everythingthat it you know, it wasn't
worth it, that you had to strikethat work life balance early on.
And I think you've done apretty, pretty good job.
Brian Bogert (30:47):
That's true. I'll tell you though, the reason I
was stuck is because I viewed itas work life balance. And
balance I don't believe exists,especially in today's world
with, you know, us beingconnected to devices constantly
balanced doesn't exist inbalance implies that you're
giving equal parts to equalthings in terms of priority. And
sometimes that's just not thecase, particularly if you're a
sole provider for a family,right, like work is inherently
(31:10):
going to just automatically putyou out of balance, because even
if all you do is work a 40 hourwork week, which many of us work
way more than that. But even ifthat's all you do is work 40
hours, you're already out ofbalance in terms of the amount
of time you spend with yourfamily versus the amount of time
you're working. And, you know,for me, my family is hands down
one first always they are myfirst priority and up into up to
an including if they aren'tgood, I will walk away from this
(31:33):
mission to impact a billionlives in a heartbeat. Because if
they're not good, that nothingelse matters. But I viewed it as
work life balance, which is whatset me up for feeling like I
couldn't actually accomplishwhat I wanted. I started to
evolve my philosophy on thisactually before I hired my
coach. But I started to evolvefrom this idea of work life
balance to work lifeintegration. I believe that if
(31:56):
we're really clear on who weare, we're really clear on the
things that are most importantto us. And we walk through a
process to bring the unconsciousto the conscious, the unaware of
the aware so that we can beintentional with everything in
our life, that we can actuallysystematically build our life in
alignment around the things thatare important for us. And it
can, it can become selfregulating over time. Right. So
(32:17):
when you integrate, that's alsoto suggest there might be a day
that I work a 16 hour day, and Iget 30 minutes with my kids
right before bed. But on theflip side, the following day, I
might work three hours, and beable to take them out on a Jeep
ride or mountain biking orwhatever, because that is what
it is. Not everybody has thatkind of flexibility. But if you
(32:39):
set intention around what'simportant to you, and you build
your life of alignment, thenit's not about the amount of
time it's about the quality oftime and how you use the time
that you have. That becomes moreimportant. So there are many
weeks that I get an hour to 90minutes a day with my family,
which is my my dinner andbedtime routine with them every
day. But most weekends, we getalmost the entire weekend. And
(33:02):
when I'm at home, I'm at home.
When I'm with my kids, I'm withmy kids, when I'm with my wife,
I'm with my wife. And so it'sabout intentional integration.
But it's also about learning howto be where your feet are. It's
about learning how to bepresent. And the reason I say Be
Where Your Feet Are, I learnedthat from my first coach. I've
stolen it from him. But it's avery easy self regulating thing.
You can look down literally.
Yep. Okay, I'm sitting hereright now with Joe on the on the
(33:24):
grit podcast. And I'm here topour my soul into the listeners
in a way to hopefully haveimpact. Right, I don't have my
phone with me, I'm not talkingto my wife and my kids. Now if
one of my kids walked in rightnow, we didn't have the
conversation, because they wouldwalk in only if they needed
something, which would tell meJoe, I have to go. But that's
because I've put in the work tounderstand the hierarchy of
importance in my life. And Ialso know how it can regulate
(33:47):
over time, because I've done itnow consistently for a number of
years. So that's the first thingI would say is let's just get
the idea of balance out of ourminds, because all it does is
make us feel like we're failing.
Focus on intentionalintegration. But you got to put
in the work to have clarity onthose things before you can do
that.
Joe Cadwell (34:03):
Does sound like you have to have a lot of personal
accountability, responsibilityto gain that, that agency of
your life. And it sounds likeyou're doing a really great job
of it and inspiring other peopleto do the same. Brian Bogart,
what's your definition ofsuccess,
Brian Bogert (34:21):
joy, freedom and fulfillment. But that can only
be accomplished if you haveabsolute clarity on who you are.
And so you know, Steve Sims, Ithink on his podcast that shared
a quote me that I'd never heardand it was this idea and I may
butcher it, but something alongthe lines of the idea of Hell is
meeting the person that youcould have been. And you know,
(34:43):
what I look at is that there'sanother quote that I play with
often and it's Who were youbefore the world told you who to
be? And so when I think aboutjoy, freedom and fulfillment,
it's about focusing on the whowho I am what's important to me,
right? We all chase the whatwhat house what car what amount
of money what job, what roleright all these things based on
those external areas that wetalked about earlier. And most
(35:05):
of the time, when that happens,people wake up one day, and
they're miserable, because theyrealize they've lost who they
are. And so they feel stuck.
They feel miserable. And so oneof the big things that we focus
on is helping people realignwith who, before what, which
requires shedding a lot of thoselayers that we also talked about
earlier, when we talk about whobefore what when we get really
clear and centered on who weare, then the what's in our
life, become a manifestation ofthe who, and they're that much
(35:27):
more powerful.
Joe Cadwell (35:31):
Brian Bogart, this has been a fantastic
conversation, where can peoplego to find out more about you
and your message?
Brian Bogert (35:37):
Yeah, so Brian Booker comm is a great place,
it's got a lot of our socialhandles integrated in there at
Burger Brian on all of them, ourYouTube channel, burgers,
bullets, all that stuff. And alot of the articles that we've
had published in Forbes andother places are also there. And
again, free and around the ideaof again, 99.999% will never pay
us $1, I do have a free resourcefor anybody listening. If you go
(35:58):
to No Limits prelude.com It's avery succinct downloadable form
of a lot of our coachingphilosophies to help you start
on your own intrinsic journey.
Ask yourself some of those rightquestions. And so whether you
know who you are, you have noidea who you are, you're
somewhere in between, this willbe a valuable resource for you.
And by the way, for many of you,it'll be all you need from us.
And so if that's the case, takeit and run and all I ask is that
(36:20):
you pay it forward and make surethat you're helping others find
who they are.
Joe Cadwell (36:25):
That's fantastic.
Thank you so much for takingyour time to be on the show.
I'll make sure and add all thatto the show notes. Brian, have a
great day. Joe, thank you. Iguess day has been Brian Bovard
from the Brian Bolgar companies.
Find out more about Brian andhis message, be sure to check
out the show notes on your smartdevice or by visiting his
(36:46):
website at Brian bogart.com.
Well, that wraps up this episodeof Grit Northwest. If you know
someone you think might benefitfrom this episode, please be
sure to share it with them. Ifyou haven't already joined the
nation. What are you waitingfor? Look for the link in the
(37:07):
show notes or by visiting thewebsite. You'll be eligible to
win grits swag and an exclusivebackstage access pass to get an
even more in depth look into theshows making and content. All
this and more when you join thegrid nation. Thanks again for
listening and until next time,this is Joe Cadwell reminding
you to work safe, work smart andstay union strong
I am Brian Bogert with the Brian Bogert companies
(00:02):
and I have Grit.
Joe Cadwell (00:12):
Joe Cadwell, the writer, producer and host of the
show and on today's episode, Ihave the honor and privilege of
speaking with Brian Gilbert,founder of the Bryan motor
companies. Brian is a humanbehavior and performance coach,
motivational speaker andbusiness strategist who has
changed the lives of 1000s. Withhis revolutionary coaching
programs. Brian starts today'sconversation by sharing with us
(00:34):
the horrific accident that hesuffered as a child that he will
explain how he was determinednot to let that tragic moment
define who we become as anadult. Brian will then relate
how we became a passionatepublic speaker who believes in
helping growth mindedindividuals become the best
version of themselves byleveraging radical authenticity
and awareness to create theintentional life they've been
dreaming of, but have struggledto create on their own. Later on
(00:58):
pack is revolutionary strategyof embracing pain to avoid
suffering, and how this hashelped individuals groups and
entire companies break beyondtheir normal to achieve the
success in life and businessthat they've always wanted. And
we'll finish our conversationwhen Brian shares his wisdom and
insight so that you too canlearn how to develop the grit
and determination needed topersevere through the toughest
(01:19):
of challenges. Be sure to checkout the show notes after the
episode to learn more aboutBrian and his message. And now
onto the show. Brian Berger,
Brian Bogert (01:31):
welcome to the show. I'm happy to be here,
brother.
Joe Cadwell (01:34):
Happy to have you on the show today, Brian, I've
really become a big fan of yourssince we first connected on
LinkedIn. Not that long ago,I've done some background
research on you looked at yourYouTube videos, visited your
website listened to some otherpodcasts. But man, you have got
a great message for mylisteners. And I'm hoping that
you can start off by telling usa little bit about Brian Bovard
(01:57):
is
Brian Bogert (01:58):
absolutely so I'm gonna I'm gonna ask you and the
listeners to close your eyes forjust a second unless you're
driving, of course, because thatthat will backfire. I'm sure.
And I'll tell you when to reopenthem. I want you to imagine
going to a store. Having asuccessful shopping trip walking
back out to your car, thinkingyou're heading on with your day.
And you turn your head and see atruck barreling 40 miles an hour
(02:19):
right at you with no time toreact. Go ahead and open your
eyes. That's where this portionof my story begins. My mom, my
brother and I went to our localWalmart to get a one inch paint
brush. And as we're headed tothe car, I mean spending a
couple of minutes with me, youcan probably tell I've got an
energy. And so it wasn't asurprise to her that I was the
first one there, I wanted to gethome and put that one in paint
brush to use. But this is backin the days before we had key
fobs. And so I got to the carfirst but I had to wait for him
(02:41):
to physically catch up the keyin the door and turn it so that
we can get on with our way. Andas we're standing there, a truck
pulls up in front of the store,driver middle passenger get out
and the passenger all the way tothe right feels the truck moving
backwards. So he did what anyone of us would do when He
screwed over to put his foot onbrake. But instead he hit the
gas combination of shock andforce threw him up on the
steering wheel up on thedashboard before you know it.
(03:02):
He's catapulting 40 miles anhour across the parking lot
right at us with no time toreact. Now we were in an end
spot so he goes over the medianup over the tree in the median
hits our car, knocks me over,runs over me diagonally tears my
spleen leaves a tire tracksgrowing my stomach and continues
on to completely severed my leftarm for my body. So there, my
(03:23):
mom and brother were havingwatched the entire thing. They
now see me laying on the groundon 115 degree day in Phoenix,
Arizona, and they look up andsee my arm 10 feet away.
Fortunately for me, my guardianangel also saw the whole thing
happened. There was a nurse thatwalked out of the store right
when this took place and she sawthe literal life and limb
scenario that was in front ofher. She rushed immediately into
action and came over and stoppedthe bleeding at the main wound
(03:45):
to save my life and instructedsome innocent bystanders to run
inside grab a cooler, get my armis within minutes to ultimately
save my limb. Had she not doneone or both of those things.
Joe, I either wouldn't be herewith you today, or I'd be here
with you today with a cleaned upstump. That's just the reality.
And I know that our listenersprobably weren't expecting it to
go through today, right? I'msure I'm sure they weren't. I
have a very unique story. AndI've learned that over time. But
(04:06):
what I've also realized overtime is that we all have unique
stories. What's important isthat we pause and become aware
of the lessons we can extractfrom those stories, and then
become intentional of how do weapply them in our lives. And we
all have the ability to do that.
We also all have the ability totap into the collective wisdom
of other people's stories toshorten our own curve to
learning. So I've got twoprimary stories I'll share with
you to kind of set the stage andthen we can take it wherever we
(04:28):
want to. The first is I learnednot to get stuck by what had
happened to me, but instead getmoved by what I could do with
it. And the second I didn'trealize until far later in life.
You see it 789 1011 12 years oldI was in the mix. I was the one
having the treatments done to methe surgeries done to me I was
gonna have to show up and dophysical therapy but I was also
being guided through theprocess. My parents However,
(04:48):
we're not in a fog, theunceasing medical treatments
years of physical therapy, andthe idea of seeing their son
grow up without the use of hisleft arm was a source of
Potential suffering, they werevery aware of all of it. And so
they did what they needed to do,to embrace the pains necessary
to ultimately strengthen andheal me to put in the work to
make sure that I'm getting thetreatments that I need to put in
(05:11):
the work around physicaltherapy, and to make sure that
they were in during all of thoseunceasing medical treatments for
my benefit. So whether or not itwas intentional, what they did
was ingrained in me andphilosophy and way of living,
which was to embrace pain, toavoid suffering. And it's these
concepts that I used to not onlybecome this unique injury, but
how my business partners and Iscaled our last business to 15
million within the span of adecade. And now how is human
(05:33):
behavior and performance coach,I flipped that on its head, to
help individuals and businessesjust like you, just like the
people listening become moreaware, more intentional, and who
they already are their mostauthentic selves. You see, I
believe that's when magichappens. And the door starts to
crack to perspective, motivationand direction. And that's when
people have a fighting chance ofhaving joy, freedom and
fulfillment enter into theirworld. And so that's why we are
(05:54):
on a mission to impact a billionlives by 2045. Because we can
reduce the level of suffering onthis planet allow joy, freedom
and fulfillment to enter intothis world, allow people to
stand on their own two feet,confident in who they are,
knowing the world's going toaccept them for who they are,
that brings us together, andwe're gonna have a lot more
beautiful place for my kids andmy grandkids to grow up. And
Joe Cadwell (06:15):
that sounds like a fantastic story, Brian, from a
very early age, you realize thatthe with every challenge comes
an opportunity for personalgrowth and, and betterment. And
you've taken your personalmission. And it sounds like you
applied it from what Iunderstand in the insurance
world for a while until you hadsort of a pivotal moment, not
that long ago, when you decidedto, to move out of insurance and
(06:38):
become a human, as you call it ahuman performance coach, and
what how did you actually cometo that? Understanding that
that's what you wanted to dowith your life.
Brian Bogert (06:48):
Yeah, so it starts a little while before the
transition. You know, aboutseven years ago, we became
parents, and the first sixmonths flew by like that. And
what I mean by that is, otherthan the first week I took off,
I missed the first six months ofmy kid's life. I'm not proud of
that, especially given the factthat my entire life I positioned
(07:09):
and said that everything I wasgonna do is for the benefit of
my family. But providing for myfamily just financially is only
part of the equation, I alsohave to have presence, I have to
have leadership, I have to havelove, I have to have connection.
And, you know, money can provideall those things. And so it was
the first time in my life that Ididn't have the mentors, the
wisdom on my own, or the peopleto be able to get the answers I
(07:31):
needed. So I went out to hire myown first coach. And ultimately,
within a month of working withhim, he said, Oh, are you gonna
be doing this? And I said, Whatare you talking about? He goes,
You need to be coaching, and youneed to be speaking
professionally. And I was like,Yay, whatever. I'm paying a lot
of money now to tell me howgreat I am. But tell me figure
out these other things. I saidI'd The last thing I need one
(07:51):
more thing under the plane, hegoes, Okay. Well, he trickled it
every month for about ninemonths. And he was telling me
what I needed to hear, not whatI wanted to hear. And he
ultimately was trying to showthat I've always built people
and built businesses. And I'vealways looked to provide
perspective, motivation anddirection to the world. And I've
been on stages for the last 30years just purely because I have
a unique story. But it's also asuccess story. And I can tell it
(08:15):
through the lens of allowingpeople to take those things away
with them those lessons away.
And so he's like, Brian, you'redoing this. Ultimately, the
universe sent me a big sign thatsaid he was right. I jumped in
with both feet. And I startedcoaching and speaking on a
regular and consistent basis, Ikept both my speaking and kept
both my coaching, just because Iwas so heavily invested
emotionally, physically,spiritually, mentally and
financially in the business thatwe built and scaled. And so I
(08:37):
just kind of kept it it was whatit was. Fast forward a little
bit, five years about summer2019, my wife and I went away.
We had one of those weekendswhere spiritually, mentally,
physically, emotionally,brother, like we were wanting,
right, like, it's just, we wereso connected. And as we're
driving back to pick up ourkids, after this phenomenal
weekend, my wife leans over inthe car and says, How would you
(08:59):
feel if you didn't have to gothe office on Monday morning?
And I was I get chills everytime I start to tell that part
because it just puts me rightback in that moment, I was
completely overtaken by fear.
And and I was like, that's apretty loaded question. Why
don't you tell me more. So shewent on to explain I had some
other health stuff that tookplace a few years prior, that
(09:20):
I'm good now. But she ultimatelysaid, I think you'd like this
last health thing. Let fearenter into your world in a way
that I've never seen youoperate. She said, I think
you've convinced yourself thatwe need the money. We need the
status, we need to financialsecurity we need to everything
that's been built as a result ofthe business. And she said but
I'm here to tell you we don't.
She said I don't care if we livein a cardboard box on the
corner. What I care about isthat we have 100% you and she
(09:41):
said whether you see it or not,you're dying a little bit inside
everyday you live in insurance.
And she said but I also knowthat over the last five years
when you've been coaching andspeaking that's what I really
think you're meant to do. Shesaid I think it barely scraping
the surface your potential, nordo I think you have any impact
on the world that you want. Andso she said there's nobody on
this planet I'd rather take abet on you Why don't we double
down on that bet, execute ourbuy, sell in the insurance
(10:03):
business and go see what we cando. And I had to spend the next
three months really sitting withthat I had to unpack and
understand my fear, I had tounpack and understand the
financial model and what thiswas going to look like. And I
got really conservative in doingthe seven year cash flow
projection, I had to really moredeeply unpack my own shame,
which I wasn't even aware of. Ihad until that that same year,
(10:26):
really 2018 2019 is when Istarted to realize how much
shame played a role in my life.
And I'd work through all thosethings. And it was September of
2019. But I communicated with myCEO and my business partners,
that I was gonna be executing myadvice on leaving at the end of
that fiscal year. And so, youknow, I had to apply a little
bit of regret minimizationtheory that Jeff Bezos
popularized, and I had to take astep back and recognize that I
could hit the easy button on thesure thing, because our business
(10:50):
was growing double digits yearover year and had been
consistently for a decade. Or Icould take a shot at seeing what
I could actually do. And what weknow with regret minimization
theory is that what peopleregret most in their lives, is
the things they didn't do, notthe things they tried and
failed. And so I take a chanceand and that's ultimately what
(11:10):
led me down that path.
Joe Cadwell (11:14):
It seems like Brian, you have a lot of things
there that are directlyrelatable to people that are in
the construction trades, themajority of the listeners of
Grit Northwest are obviouslyblue collar workers. And
starting off with the physicalchallenge. I mean, obviously,
you had a very, very significantsetback as far as your
physicality. And I know a lot ofour members are obviously very
(11:38):
physically capable, able to, toovercome the challenges of the
construction world, but thereare a lot of biases that are
placed against some barriers. Soyeah, that that they have to
overcome. We have a lot of womenin the trades. We have a lot of
minorities in the trades and alot of people that just there's
these unseen barriers that theyhave to overcome. And you talk
(11:58):
about, you know, theperseverance to push through
those what type of advice whenthings get down? And when you're
really, you know, feeling likeor speculating, is this really
the place for me? How do youhave a view, dug deep to find a
way to draw that inner strengthto continue through and push on?
Brian Bogert (12:15):
Yeah, so I think I have to start with helping
understand, like, where do theseexternal narratives come from?
And why do they impact us?
Because I think we have to startthere before we can talk about
how do we move through them? Youknow, I believe this is the case
in the world. And it's onlyfurther exemplified in certain
industries, right. And what Imean by this is, we are born as
the most bright, burning,authentic light we will ever be.
(12:39):
And then what happens, as wegrow as parents, teachers,
coaches, employers startlayering on all these things
about what the world is going toaccept, right, you should do
this, you should be that youshouldn't do this, you should be
that you should chase thisamount of money, you should
define success. This way, youshould chase the material
(12:59):
things. And the older we get,what starts to happen is all
these narratives just startgetting layered on top of us
until the fact that we actuallybelieve them. And we buy into
the external narrative, to thepoint that we also lose who we
are in the process, we lose whatwe want in the process, we lose
clarity on the things that areimportant to us in the process.
(13:21):
Because we're conditioned tofollow the path of external
success based on the how theworld defines it. Okay, so you
talked about these biases, thesebiases, or external narratives,
some biases can be true, purelyby demographics and numbers, you
start to see yes, there'spatterns that develop. But the
rule, right, that the ruledoesn't have to be just because
(13:43):
this is how our world is shapedthat that is what it's always
going to be. Right. So when youtalk about these biases around,
you know, females and minoritiesthat are in the trades, often
it's viewed as well. Okay,great. There's not a lot of
females in the trades. Does thatmean females can't exist in the
trades? Or you have to be ayoung male to operate here? And
the answer doesn't have to beyes to that. The other thing is,
(14:05):
I think there's a lot of peoplewho fall into certain roles,
jobs or positions, becauseeither they grew up that way, my
family's always been in thetrade. So of course, I've got to
go down the trades, right? Mydad, my grandpa, we've always
been a blue collar family. So Ihave to be a blue collar worker.
And not always is that true? Doyou have to let your past or the
(14:26):
patterns in your family orenvironment or community define
who you are in your future. AndI think that that's what
typically allows people to feelstuck. stymied in their own
efforts to fill their potentialis when they chase the external
narrative versus the internalone, which by the way, almost
all of us have done, becausethat's how the world conditions
(14:46):
us to operate. I talked aboutall these shoulds that the world
I want to say one thing realquick and then and we can talk a
little further on this talksabout these shoulds should is
inherently a shame based word.
because it automatically impliesthat whatever you're doing isn't
good enough. And so that's theother piece is if you're feeling
(15:08):
stuck, how many times have youheard somebody tell you, you
should be on the path thatyou're on. Or you should be
grateful for the role that youhave. Or you should be happy
about the fact that you've gotmoney and food on the table,
right? If you're miserable everysingle day, throw the shoulds
out the window, and start askingyourself, what could I or what
would I do, if I wasn't buyinginto the external narratives,
and I followed what I reallywant to do.
Joe Cadwell (15:30):
And following what you really want to do for having
that passion, having that desirethat you want to fulfill can
elevate you to the next higherlevel 100%. And so it's so
important for us as asprofessional carpenters or
trades people to recognize thatthat, you know, I have to
develop myself on so many otherlevels, as opposed to just being
(15:52):
able to do the work. And I thinkcommunication is a huge
component of that, becausecommunication is one of the
foundation foundational stonesof leadership. And I know you're
a professional public speakeryou before COVID, were on tour
quite a bit. Since COVID. Ithink you've found kind of a
niche market usingtelecommunication podcast,
(16:15):
obviously. And how important iscommunication, in your opinion,
to developing the person thatyou feel that you are meant to
be?
Brian Bogert (16:24):
Oh, I think communication is critical. I
think it's one of the absolutefoundational elements that's
required to not only developinto who you are, but to also
develop in a way that you canlead others. It's absolutely
essential. You know, I and I saycommunication in that how you
can articulate not just yourthought, but how you can
(16:45):
articulate your feelings. And Ithink internal communications
where it has to start because ifyou're not clear inside, how can
you ever be expected to be clearoutside? You know, Brene, Brown
has this, this beautiful saying,is that clear is kind, unclear
is unkind. That's all aboutcommunication. That's all about
where and how can I communicateeffectively, that's about
(17:07):
vulnerability. That's aboutauthenticity, vulnerability, and
authenticity are the glue thatbinds human connection. So if
you actually want to be a solidleader, you want to advance in
your trade. Right? You have tofocus on understanding and being
honest with yourself internally,and how you communicate, and
then constantly finding ways toimprove your level of
(17:28):
communication. And I believethis is true for anybody in any
trade in any role across theworld. What often gets in our
way are things that are not saidor are misinterpreted, which is
a lack of clear communication.
You know, I work withindividuals, often in a way that
allows them to grab what theythink is just out of their grasp
90% of the time, it's aboutcommunicating things that they
(17:51):
haven't communicated prior. Ihave a client right now that his
wife has commented in the lastthree months, that clear and
distinct difference in his levelof communication inside the
house and with her around hisfears, his scarcity, his issues,
the blocks within therelationship. And it just so
(18:12):
happens that it's also that lackof communication was holding him
back in the business that heowns, which is in real estate
development. Right. And hewasn't being clear with his
team's about the way that he wasoperating 90% of what we've
worked on over this period oftime, although it's not truly
this, it's the externalmanifestation of it is
communication. At the end of theday, it's vocalizing what you're
(18:33):
thinking and feeling in a waythat you are clear to other
people. So they understand yourperspective, and can better
communicate back with youthere's so that you can find the
common middle ground and moveforward. I think communication
is critical.
Joe Cadwell (18:47):
I think you nailed it. And I think my own personal
journey with communicationstarted about eight years ago,
in our organization, whichreally takes a lot of emphasis
to educate our members and takesa lot of pride in developing
leadership. And it was when Iwent to the journeymen
leadership program down in LasVegas, which is a four year four
(19:09):
day program where they impartupon you the history of our
organization and and again, workon your own personal
communication styles. And thenthat light bulb went off for me
at that time, because obviouslywe're communicating from from
the very early age, when we'rejust starting to cry, we want
something to then, you know,having these negotiations
between our childhood friendsand arguing over toys or who did
(19:33):
what and how they did. And thenthe communication though, is
brought upon in school, we learnhow to read, we learn how to
write, but we really don't put alot of emphasis on clear
communication and understandingthat yeah, we have we have two
ears and one mouth for a reason.
And that communication, there'sso much that is just built into
the listening and understandinghow, what other people are
(19:53):
saying not just hearing them,but actually understanding what
they're saying.
Brian Bogert (19:59):
Yeah, and I think there's a really important
distinction to that I want toclarify on you know, I think
what we realize and know intoday's world, but again, the
external narrative is told usthat only one can be accepted is
that we have intellectual andemotional narratives. Right? We
have thoughts, and we haveemotions, and very rarely do we,
as individuals connect thosetwo. And so communication is
also not just about being ableto vocalize and articulate what
(20:22):
are we thinking, but what are wefeeling because it's often those
triggers and that emotional sidethat doesn't get translated,
which keeps people frustrated,stuck, fearful scares, shamed
all of the above those emotionsthat we all somewhat understand,
the world has told us, let'sjust shove that stuff down, show
up and put a smile on our face,and let's go to business. But
the reality of it is, is there'salways something that's there,
(20:43):
I'll own one, this just happenedliterally this morning. I have
an associate that I work with.
She's young, she hasn't had awhole lot of jobs, there's been
interactions, but she worked invery toxic environments prior,
there was almost abuse from herboss in certain ways in the
language and how theycommunicated, which she's
internalized. Right, and shecarries it with her. Now, we had
(21:03):
an interaction over the weekend,she texted me on something, and
I responded back, not thinkingmuch more beyond it. But it
triggered her. And I didn'trealize that it triggered her
until we had our Monday morningmeeting yesterday. And I started
to see that something was off.
So I started to probe a littlebit and ask questions, she
started to pull back. I had toreally think through this last
(21:26):
night, because if she's not ableto communicate it, how can I
lead down a path so that I cangive her the permission in the
space to communicate or find thewords to figure out what it is.
So I sat with it. And I thoughtabout I was like, oh, maybe my
text triggered her shame and hertoxicity from her prior for her
prior work relationship. So Italked her about it today, I was
just on a zoom call with her for45 minutes, because I care about
(21:47):
her deeply. And I want her tounderstand like that sometimes
we miss communicate,particularly in written form.
And it's easy to like putnarratives emotionally and
intellectually around commentsthat might not have any intent
that was aligned with that. Butit was also miss received.
Because if we rely on text, it'sonly a small portion of how we
communicate. And so I had aconversation with her and unpack
this. And I led with that wholepiece through 45 minutes, that
(22:10):
was exactly the case, sheactually had told me she's like
I was triggered, I didn't havethe words to say, and I didn't
know if I'd be able tocommunicate that to you. And as
a result of my own conditioning,I was actually looking for
reasons to potentially bail onthis role, even though I really,
really want it.
Joe Cadwell (22:25):
And that's something that is so easily like
you say misinterpreted in a textin an email in written form,
because as we know, so muchcommunication is not the words
coming out of your mouth, butthe your facial expressions,
your mannerisms, your bodypositioning, so much of
communication is not actuallywhat's coming out. And to steal
a quote from Maya, Maya Angelou,you know, people don't
(22:46):
necessarily remember what yousay they remember how you make
them feel. That's right. Andthat is a, it's really hard to
express feeling via text.
Brian Bogert (22:56):
That's right.
Well, and here's the thing, 7%of our communication is in the
words that we choose 38% of ourcommunication is in the tone and
the cadence of our delivery. 55%of our communication is in our
nonverbal cues. So if you're onthe phone, you're only getting
45% of communication. If you'rein text or an email, you're
(23:17):
getting 7% of communication. Ifwe're here, right now, we're
getting as close to 100 as wecan get in a virtual world,
because I can see you I can seeyour micro expressions, I can
see your body language, but I'mstill only seeing a portion of
it. But 55% of our communicationis on our nonverbal cues. So
communication is unbelievablyimportant. But the medium with
which we communicate, dependingon the type of communication is
(23:39):
equally, if not more important.
Joe Cadwell (23:43):
So understanding how important communication is
Brian, understanding that we canget stuck in ruts occasionally,
professionally, personally,relationship wise, where would
someone turn to try to get outof these ruts? And who would
they they interact with in orderto help them along to get to the
next level?
Brian Bogert (24:04):
Yeah, so I think there's a variety of answers to
that. I'll keep it reallysimple. I'm a big believer that
the first person to turn to toget yourself out of anything is
yourself. And I know that soundsa little bit like coy when I
answered that, but I thinkthere's a lot of people who are
looking to be saved. There's alot of people that are looking
for a hero they're looking for,right what what, who can help
(24:26):
them get out of what they'redoing. And I think a lot of
people haven't done the owntheir own internal work strong
enough to have the foundation toreally be able to stand up on
their own two feet. So I alwaystell people to start with
themselves outside of that.
Because internally what we knowis that there's only so much
awareness we can gain, right? Sowe're going to have internal and
external self awareness. So whenyou start with yourself, it's to
ask yourself the questions like,you know, why am I stuck? What
(24:48):
am I feeling right now? What isthe root of it? Like really give
yourself the path to understandmaybe why you feel stuck, and
then only ask why questions to apoint and shift it to a what
question Which is okay, now thatI have this understanding of
myself and the situation I'm in,what can I do about it on a
future focus and perspective,objective perspective? What are
the conversations I can have?
(25:09):
What are the actions I can take?
Right? What are the ways I cankind of think through my
emotions, but I don't gettriggered on those same ways.
Once you've gone through that,or if you don't know how to do
that, you can still lookoutside. I'm still a big
believer, we have to do thatinternal work. And you'll hear
me say that always. But if youhave no idea where to start, I
would say look for people thatyou trust in your life. Look,
for a mentor, look for a guide,look for a friend, look for a
(25:32):
coach, I say, Coach last,because I think that 90% of
people aren't ready for a coach,start with all the free options
First, put in the work andfigure out what you can do. But
you know, a spouse can be areally good sounding board to
help you see blind spots, youknow, maybe they see very
clearly why you're stuck, andyou don't have clarity on it. A
mentor, someone who's maybewalked your path before might
(25:54):
have very relevant experience,not only in the situation,
you've been in the way you'refeeling the way that you can
understand. And so they cantypically provide advice, or
perspective on the ways tonavigate through it. You know,
even kids, depending on theirages, and the relationship you
have can be folks to help youget unstuck, right, my son and
my daughter, even though they'reonly seven, and almost six, have
(26:16):
given me moments of clarity, byme just putting myself in a
position that I can learn fromanybody. And so as long as we
can kind of trust and surrenderto the fact that we can learn,
and we can seek advice fromanyone in our life, then it's
really feeling alone, that keepsus stuck more than anything. And
the more we can kind of makethose connections, to be have a
level of trust and vulnerabilityto be able to grow and know that
(26:40):
you're trusted. And whatever youshare is being received
objectively and nonjudgmentally, then you can move
forward productively, I stillthink the internal work needs to
be done. But there's a lot ofpeople who can guide you.
Joe Cadwell (26:53):
So turn inward First, look for a solid mentor
and a mentor. mentorships arehuge in the apprenticeship
program. And we always encouragepeople to find a mentor that
that you get along with that,that you respect that
communicates well with you. Andthat truly cares about your
forward progression through theprogram and into the into the
trades. And that's a huge part.
And then also, as you said, youcan turn externally, and I know
(27:16):
the Brian booger companies,especially on YouTube have
burger bullets. And I was hopingyou could tell us a little bit
about Bogot's bullets.
Brian Bogert (27:27):
Yeah, so bogus bullets is something that we
started early. When the companystarted. And it went
consistently. I did a video aweek for about a year. And we
started doing them again about ayear ago. So we're on that same
weekly cadence we stopped for afew years because people who
didn't know me liked thecontent. Like the videos got
(27:49):
stuff from it, people who hadseen me speak live or who knew
me, always said, Brian, it'sjust not the same, right. And so
I've always committed to myselfthat even if I'm going to
potentially have a positiveimpact in somebody's life, if
it's not being delivered 100%authentic by me, then I would
rather have no impact than inauthentic impact. And so I pause
(28:10):
doing it for a while, whatbogans bullets is a three to
five minute topical video everysingle week, where we take an
abstract and esoteric thoughtprocess around a topic, just to
provide a different way forpeople to think or feel about
those types of things that arenot scripted, that are on the
fly, I get inspiration, I turnthe camera on, I talk for three
(28:31):
to five minutes, and then I sendit off to my content team. And I
typically don't watch them againafter they're out. So that's
where I'm at with it. It's justlike a free flowing thought. But
we have you know, a number ofsubscribers who love that every
single week, they you know, weput it out on social media. And
we also have a text list that wesend it out in bulk. So people
just have the direct link onYouTube. And that's just been a
really fun passion project. Youknow, when I when I told you
(28:53):
earlier that we're going to beimpacting a billion lives and by
2045 I'm very aware that99.99999999999% will never pay
us $1 And I'm very okay withthat. And so over its bullets is
an example of that, because weput out a lot of free content
just simply to provide help,perspective, motivation
direction and something to helpelevate and empower people to
(29:14):
stand on their own two feet andknow that they're not alone. And
so that's what it is. And I'mhappy that you were able to get
in there but yeah, I don't knowif you watched any of those
early episodes, you'll see theenergy and deliveries totally
different.
Joe Cadwell (29:24):
Yeah, you have some great ones on strength and
courage and how you share that.
How do I make an impact is a youknow, one that I watched I
thought it was especially goodwhat's holding you back? And
then he had one on marriagehacks. And you talked about it
early on, you know, the firstsix months of your child's life
you weren't there. And findingthat work life balance is was
especially difficult for you itsounds like as can be for so
(29:45):
many of our carpenters andtrades people because the work
tends to dictate, you know, whenand where we go, especially
myself as a commercial diver. IfI waited for work to find food
come close to my home I had tostarve to death. way early on,
so I chase the work for a good75 80% of my my career, I never
did have children. So I didn'tmiss that element of family
(30:07):
life. And I had a very patientunderstanding wife, I still do.
But yeah, that balance is verydifficult for a lot of people to
strike. And you are someone thatsaid, I cannot continue down
that road, and you had theability to change your sort of
destiny in regards to that. Iencourage so many of the
listeners right now to reallyevaluate what is important to
(30:28):
you and keeping those things inbalance. And I think, having
done some research with you,Brian, you had said you did not
want to be one of those peoplethat at age 40 After having a
divorce and losing everythingthat it you know, it wasn't
worth it, that you had to strikethat work life balance early on.
And I think you've done apretty, pretty good job.
Brian Bogert (30:47):
That's true. I'll tell you though, the reason I
was stuck is because I viewed itas work life balance. And
balance I don't believe exists,especially in today's world
with, you know, us beingconnected to devices constantly
balanced doesn't exist inbalance implies that you're
giving equal parts to equalthings in terms of priority. And
sometimes that's just not thecase, particularly if you're a
sole provider for a family,right, like work is inherently
(31:10):
going to just automatically putyou out of balance, because even
if all you do is work a 40 hourwork week, which many of us work
way more than that. But even ifthat's all you do is work 40
hours, you're already out ofbalance in terms of the amount
of time you spend with yourfamily versus the amount of time
you're working. And, you know,for me, my family is hands down
one first always they are myfirst priority and up into up to
an including if they aren'tgood, I will walk away from this
(31:33):
mission to impact a billionlives in a heartbeat. Because if
they're not good, that nothingelse matters. But I viewed it as
work life balance, which is whatset me up for feeling like I
couldn't actually accomplishwhat I wanted. I started to
evolve my philosophy on thisactually before I hired my
coach. But I started to evolvefrom this idea of work life
balance to work lifeintegration. I believe that if
(31:56):
we're really clear on who weare, we're really clear on the
things that are most importantto us. And we walk through a
process to bring the unconsciousto the conscious, the unaware of
the aware so that we can beintentional with everything in
our life, that we can actuallysystematically build our life in
alignment around the things thatare important for us. And it
can, it can become selfregulating over time. Right. So
(32:17):
when you integrate, that's alsoto suggest there might be a day
that I work a 16 hour day, and Iget 30 minutes with my kids
right before bed. But on theflip side, the following day, I
might work three hours, and beable to take them out on a Jeep
ride or mountain biking orwhatever, because that is what
it is. Not everybody has thatkind of flexibility. But if you
(32:39):
set intention around what'simportant to you, and you build
your life of alignment, thenit's not about the amount of
time it's about the quality oftime and how you use the time
that you have. That becomes moreimportant. So there are many
weeks that I get an hour to 90minutes a day with my family,
which is my my dinner andbedtime routine with them every
day. But most weekends, we getalmost the entire weekend. And
(33:02):
when I'm at home, I'm at home.
When I'm with my kids, I'm withmy kids, when I'm with my wife,
I'm with my wife. And so it'sabout intentional integration.
But it's also about learning howto be where your feet are. It's
about learning how to bepresent. And the reason I say Be
Where Your Feet Are, I learnedthat from my first coach. I've
stolen it from him. But it's avery easy self regulating thing.
You can look down literally.
Yep. Okay, I'm sitting hereright now with Joe on the on the
(33:24):
grit podcast. And I'm here topour my soul into the listeners
in a way to hopefully haveimpact. Right, I don't have my
phone with me, I'm not talkingto my wife and my kids. Now if
one of my kids walked in rightnow, we didn't have the
conversation, because they wouldwalk in only if they needed
something, which would tell meJoe, I have to go. But that's
because I've put in the work tounderstand the hierarchy of
importance in my life. And Ialso know how it can regulate
(33:47):
over time, because I've done itnow consistently for a number of
years. So that's the first thingI would say is let's just get
the idea of balance out of ourminds, because all it does is
make us feel like we're failing.
Focus on intentionalintegration. But you got to put
in the work to have clarity onthose things before you can do
that.
Joe Cadwell (34:03):
Does sound like you have to have a lot of personal
accountability, responsibilityto gain that, that agency of
your life. And it sounds likeyou're doing a really great job
of it and inspiring other peopleto do the same. Brian Bogart,
what's your definition ofsuccess,
Brian Bogert (34:21):
joy, freedom and fulfillment. But that can only
be accomplished if you haveabsolute clarity on who you are.
And so you know, Steve Sims, Ithink on his podcast that shared
a quote me that I'd never heardand it was this idea and I may
butcher it, but something alongthe lines of the idea of Hell is
meeting the person that youcould have been. And you know,
(34:43):
what I look at is that there'sanother quote that I play with
often and it's Who were youbefore the world told you who to
be? And so when I think aboutjoy, freedom and fulfillment,
it's about focusing on the whowho I am what's important to me,
right? We all chase the whatwhat house what car what amount
of money what job, what roleright all these things based on
those external areas that wetalked about earlier. And most
(35:05):
of the time, when that happens,people wake up one day, and
they're miserable, because theyrealize they've lost who they
are. And so they feel stuck.
They feel miserable. And so oneof the big things that we focus
on is helping people realignwith who, before what, which
requires shedding a lot of thoselayers that we also talked about
earlier, when we talk about whobefore what when we get really
clear and centered on who weare, then the what's in our
life, become a manifestation ofthe who, and they're that much
(35:27):
more powerful.
Joe Cadwell (35:31):
Brian Bogart, this has been a fantastic
conversation, where can peoplego to find out more about you
and your message?
Brian Bogert (35:37):
Yeah, so Brian Booker comm is a great place,
it's got a lot of our socialhandles integrated in there at
Burger Brian on all of them, ourYouTube channel, burgers,
bullets, all that stuff. And alot of the articles that we've
had published in Forbes andother places are also there. And
again, free and around the ideaof again, 99.999% will never pay
us $1, I do have a free resourcefor anybody listening. If you go
(35:58):
to No Limits prelude.com It's avery succinct downloadable form
of a lot of our coachingphilosophies to help you start
on your own intrinsic journey.
Ask yourself some of those rightquestions. And so whether you
know who you are, you have noidea who you are, you're
somewhere in between, this willbe a valuable resource for you.
And by the way, for many of you,it'll be all you need from us.
And so if that's the case, takeit and run and all I ask is that
(36:20):
you pay it forward and make surethat you're helping others find
who they are.
Joe Cadwell (36:25):
That's fantastic.
Thank you so much for takingyour time to be on the show.
I'll make sure and add all thatto the show notes. Brian, have a
great day. Joe, thank you. Iguess day has been Brian Bovard
from the Brian Bolgar companies.
Find out more about Brian andhis message, be sure to check
out the show notes on your smartdevice or by visiting his
(36:46):
website at Brian bogart.com.
Well, that wraps up this episodeof Grit Northwest. If you know
someone you think might benefitfrom this episode, please be
sure to share it with them. Ifyou haven't already joined the
nation. What are you waitingfor? Look for the link in the
(37:07):
show notes or by visiting thewebsite. You'll be eligible to
win grits swag and an exclusivebackstage access pass to get an
even more in depth look into theshows making and content. All
this and more when you join thegrid nation. Thanks again for
listening and until next time,this is Joe Cadwell reminding
you to work safe, work smart andstay union strong
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Are You A Charlotte?
In 1997, actress Kristin Davis’ life was forever changed when she took on the role of Charlotte York in Sex and the City. As we watched Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte navigate relationships in NYC, the show helped push once unacceptable conversation topics out of the shadows and altered the narrative around women and sex. We all saw ourselves in them as they searched for fulfillment in life, sex and friendships. Now, Kristin Davis wants to connect with you, the fans, and share untold stories and all the behind the scenes. Together, with Kristin and special guests, what will begin with Sex and the City will evolve into talks about themes that are still so relevant today. "Are you a Charlotte?" is much more than just rewatching this beloved show, it brings the past and the present together as we talk with heart, humor and of course some optimism.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.