August 3, 2025 • 16 mins
Ever feel like your mind is a battlefield? You're not alone. Beneath the surface of our daily struggles lies a fascinating truth about how our brains function—and more importantly, how they can change.
The journey toward emotional regulation begins with understanding that your brain isn't broken. That anxiety keeping you up at night, the stress making you snap at loved ones, or the emotional overwhelm threatening to derail your day—these are all your brain doing exactly what it's designed to do: protect you from perceived threats. But here's the revolutionary insight that neuroscience offers: your brain can be rewired at any age.
Through this episode, we explore a powerful three-step framework that transforms emotional chaos into calm control. You'll discover why simply naming your emotions actually calms your brain's alarm system, how tiny daily habits create lasting neural pathways, and why anchoring yourself in the present moment breaks the cycle of anxiety and depression. These science-backed techniques take just minutes of your day but can fundamentally shift your emotional landscape.
The World Health Organisation reports that one in eight people worldwide live with diagnosed mental health disorders, with countless others struggling silently. Whether you're dealing with workplace stress, relationship challenges, parenting pressures, or simply the background anxiety of modern life, these practical tools can help you respond rather than react, preserving your energy, relationships, and wellbeing.
Take the two-minute challenge this week: name one emotion daily, practice one brain hack, and use the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding exercise when triggered. Your brain is not your enemy but your ally—and with the right approach, you can build a calmer, stronger mind. Share this episode with someone who might need these insights, and join us next week as we explore resilience and self-esteem on GW Unspoken.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:18):
Welcome to another edition of GW Unspoken, where we
discuss stuff I don't typicallytalk about but probably should.
And we've just finished ourseries of health, of the innate
code the eight things of fuelthat makes up holistic health
and well-being.
And if you haven't had a chanceto listen to those podcasts,
maybe go back and have a listento some of those things that may
have well, I guess may resonatewith you, but also that maybe
I'll pass on to other people whomay be struggling in life or
(00:40):
just want to try and improve afew things.
And everything we do on thepodcast is being researched and
also based on neuroscience.
So I'm just a massive fan ofneuroscience after working with
Stronger Brains, because it'sneuroscience, it's our brains
are the captain of the ship.
So while we try and get that inthe best place we can, we're
starting a new series now thathopefully you'll find
(01:02):
interesting, and I love yourfeedback.
I love people who are writingin and asking to add certain
things or help with some of thesituations they've got.
If I can, that'd be great.
Again, happy to research andtry and find some information,
but today I really want to talkabout what are the main things
that we struggle with?
What are the main things westruggle with?
Socially and emotionally,because we are humans, are
emotional beings.
We don't often work on logic.
(01:28):
I think one time I went into aplace to buy a dishwasher and I
was trying to get.
We had a new house, I wastrying to get a new dishwasher
and at least getting some quotes.
And I remember walking out witha coffee machine.
I'm like what the hell justhappened?
And we get home, plug it in,all excited and as I was
plugging in, I'm going there'sstill a hole in the space, space
where the dishwasher issupposed to be.
But I've now got a coffeemachine.
What just happened?
And it's just buying an emotion.
The sales guy was obviouslyawesome and I was very weak, but
(01:50):
at the end of the day, we areemotional people and it doesn't
necessarily mean we work onlogic all the time.
So, look, when your mind feelslike a battlefield, how can you
find calm and regain control?
And again, we're talking aboutmental health and emotional
regulation for yourself rightnow.
And before you go oh, this istoo deep, whatever.
(02:11):
How are you traveling right now, like if you're listening to
this podcast, and no matterwhere you be gym walking, dog
sitting at home.
I don't know, maybe you'restarting to cook, maybe you're
just on the way to work, way toschool.
How are you traveling with yourrelationships?
How are you traveling with yourinner connection?
How are you traveling withyourself?
What are some things that youstruggle with every single day?
What are some things that arelike Groundhog Day, which means
(02:34):
they just happen over and overagain and it's actually not
improving?
So you know, this affectseveryone.
So I want you to think aboutthis.
Have you ever felt anxious,burnout or emotional all over
the place?
This episode's for you becausehere's one thing You're not
broken.
Your brain's actually doingwhat it's designed to do, but it
(02:54):
can be rewired and that's theimportant thing to understand.
You, the listener.
You want to feel in control ofyour emotions.
You want to wake up without aknot in your stomach, go through
the day without snapping atpeople and maybe sleep without
your brain running on high alertor the high reel every single
day, thinking about the awkwardthings you've done throughout
the day.
(03:15):
You know, sometimes people justlive on the edge and that's a
big problem.
You know, sometimes people'sanxiety just whispers what if
this all goes wrong?
Or your depression says what'sthe point.
You know your stress is youworking from place to place for
survival instead of strategy,and that's what our brains are
designed to do.
They look to go away fromdanger, and so they look for
(03:39):
survival.
They look for all the dangersall the time.
And here's a saving truth, afact I got from the World Health
Organization.
It says that one in eightpeople worldwide live with a
diagnosed mental health disorder, and you've got to think about
it.
Many more are undiagnosed andthey're silently struggling, and
that's why I asked you to start.
How are you actually traveling?
Because, internally, mostpeople are exhausted, not just
(04:03):
physically but emotionally, andwhen people can't regulate their
emotions and, for example, youcan't regulate your emotion it
impacts, yeah, your work andyour health, but it also impacts
those people around you and allthose important relationships
that you probably need in yourlife.
And don't worry, I've beenthere, burning out, running on
empty, feeling like my emotionswere in the driver's seat.
But look, here's the good newsyour brain is not fixed, and
(04:27):
some people have heard aboutthis before, and neuroscience
has come a long way in the last10, 12 years, but I think, even
when I was teaching, it's reallyimportant that, once the
students understood their brainscould change and they had the
ability to rewire itself.
It means they could understand,have power to know they could
change the way they could think,feel and react at any age.
(04:48):
And you're no different.
And this isn't about pretendingeverything's fine.
It's about building a mentaltoolkit to navigate life's ups
and downs without losing yourtrue, authentic self.
So here's a three-stepframework we'll walk through
today really quickly.
There's three things I want youto think about.
Number one pause and name it.
(05:10):
And that means this talks aboutwhy labeling your emotions
takes away their power Reallyimportant.
Done this before forrelationships Really important,
this one.
Number two rewire the smallhabits.
Use micro-practices to retrainyour brain.
You know we do the same thing.
Most of us do the same thing80% of the time, and we think
the same thing 80% fromyesterday to today.
(05:33):
80%, right.
If you're driving to work ordriving to school or riding your
bike, whatever, are you goingexactly the same way you always
do.
Oh yes, gabe, it's faster.
We do the same thingsubconsciously 80% of the time.
And the third thing anchor inthe present.
We just finished themindfulness series, but granting
yourself so you're not livingin the future or past is so
(05:55):
important for your mental healthand social-emotional regulation
, all right.
So again, don't just listen tothis episode and nod along.
Pick one of these tools Ishared today and actually try it
this week and see how theneuroscience or the
neuroplasticity works, see howrepetition builds new neural
pathways and see if there's achange in your behavior and your
connections and therefore,maybe your improvement in your
(06:17):
mental health.
Okay, here's the first one.
Ready, pause and name it.
Your amygdala, that part ofyour brain that's responsible
for fear and emotionalreactivity, calms down when you
label what you're feeling.
So, instead of saying I'mlosing it, say something like
I'm feeling anxious because I'mworried I'm going to miss this
deadline, right, rather than say, oh, I just hate driving to
(06:40):
work every single day, just saywe just get so frustrated being
banked up in traffic everysingle day, it just costs me so
much time.
Name it.
Name it I'm frustrated, allright.
And then say the reason why.
Um, an american study foundthat effectively labeling things
puts feelings into words andthat significantly reduces the
(07:03):
activity in the amygdala, thatemotional center of your brain,
and that allows your prefrontalcortex, that rational brain,
that thinking party brain, toactually take the lead.
So try it.
I don't want to swear at yourpeople around you, but try and
say it.
Just pause and name how you'refeeling.
I'm feeling frustrated becausethis breakup I'm really, it's
breaking my heart.
This has happened.
(07:23):
I don't know if I'll ever getover this, but I'm so sad right
now.
All right, put it on paper,have a journal, say it out loud,
say it to yourself in themirror.
All right doesn't mean you'regoing to be perfect the next day
or two minutes later, but itactually starts getting that
emotional brain calmed downbecause your thinking brain,
(07:43):
more rational, comes over andresides in what's.
That's what we need.
All right, try it, no matterhow silly it sounds.
Number two rewire those smallhabits.
You know neuroscience workslike this.
Neurons that fire together workto wire together.
So if you constantly rehearsestress in your brain, it becomes
more and more stress.
If you rehearse calm, even inmicrobursts, your brain starts
(08:05):
to default there.
So that sounds really easy todo.
And it's not easy to do I'm notsaying it is, but whatever you
constantly rehearse in yourthoughts becomes reality,
because that's how our neuralpathways work.
They become thicker andstronger on what we keep telling
it.
So what are you telling yourbrain every single day what are
the things.
You wake up in the morning andgo bang straight into instant
(08:26):
stress.
How can we start rewiring thoselittle things, those little
microbursts, to change that?
So here's some little hacks thatwe might be able to use.
Have a two-minute breath reset.
So do a four, seven, eightbreathing and I found this
really hard at the start soinhale for four through your
nose, so a really deep inhalebreath, hold for a massive seven
(08:49):
seconds.
So hold it and then breathe outslowly through your mouth for
eight seconds.
Alright, I was too worriedabout the numbers when I first
did that, but after a while youdo maybe three or four sets of
that.
It's just crazy how much thatcan actually slow things down
like that.
Too worried about the numberswhen I first did that, but after
a while you do maybe three orfour sets of that.
It's just crazy how much thatcan actually slow things down.
Like that's a minute and a half, a minute and a half, two
(09:09):
minutes to reset.
Everyone can find two minutesof the day.
All right, how about this secondone for a brain hack?
Become maybe a gratitude shift.
So write down three things youappreciate, even if they're tiny
.
What are three things right now?
You know the power you get whenyou actually text someone, a
friend, et cetera, how gratefulyou are for them and why, like,
the feeling you get when yousend that message is amazing.
(09:32):
And if they send something backand say, look, thanks, that's
awesome, we appreciate you too.
It's like a double dopamine hit.
You know, I tried that with mywife once sending her flowers.
She asked what I did wrong.
But it's important you actuallysay those words and get
yourself out there and bevulnerable, because that's how
you actually you know connectanyway, when you feel like you
belong and can be vulnerable.
(09:52):
All right, here's another brainhack.
Movement triggers Stand, stretch, walk every hour to break the
stress cycle.
We know that cortisol builds upin the body, testosterone
builds up in the body.
It can actually have thatfeeling of tight tension if you
can't get rid of that release,that emotional release and
physical release.
Get up, move, stretch.
(10:13):
Just do it for short bursts.
Again, we tell ourselves we'retoo busy to do these things.
Get up and move, get thatcortisol out of your body Again.
That can help you feel morecalm.
Relaxing medulla, the emotionalcenter, prefrontal cortex,
switches on thinking part ofyour brain More logical, less
stress Makes sense.
(10:38):
Okay, and here's number threeanchor in the present.
We talked about three things.
So the first one we talkedabout was pause and aim it.
Second one rewire the smallhabits.
Third anchor in the present.
So anxiety pulls you into thefuture.
Depression drags you into thepast, so mindfulness plants you
in the now.
It sort of breaks both of thosecycles of anxiety and
depression.
So, again, simple groundingexercises.
I love doing this with a groupof TAFE students once, and some
(10:58):
are up to 65 years old and somewere as young as 16, 17.
But we did this one.
We went outside and we were allstanding on the veranda out at
I think it was Bracken RidgeTAFE.
I said, right, nice and quiet,everyone, just for a couple of
minutes, and I'm going to getyour feedback at the end, but I
want you to be present.
And we did the four, seven,eight, breath.
(11:19):
And then after that I said well,name five things you can see in
your brain.
Don't say it loud.
And then I went okay, what'sfour things you can feel right
now?
So it would be your clothes onyour skin, your hands on the
rail, you know, the breezehitting your face, your hair
hitting your face, whatever itmight be.
You know three things.
You can hear, two things youcan actually smell which is
(11:43):
actually a hard one to do andone thing you can taste.
There's something still in yourmouth you've had for lunch or
you've had a drink.
From it you can still taste.
And that 5, 4, 3, 2, 1grounding exercise really gets
people focused on the now, andI've had a couple of people at
the end of that actually saythis is awesome.
Can we connect outside just tochat about some other strategies
(12:04):
you've got, because I feel mybrain is always thinking in the
future and I do feel anxious Trythose ones out.
You've got nothing to lose ifnothing has changed so far.
Here's another.
I'd love to do the research toback up what we're talking about
, but Harvard research foundthat people spend 47% of their
waking hours thinking aboutsomething other than what
they're doing.
People spend 47% of theirwaking hours thinking about
(12:24):
something other than whatthey're doing.
You know, donald Miller, who'sa massive into marketing, says
that our brains 30% of the timeare actually off wandering.
They're not actually focused.
So if 47% of our waking hoursis thinking about something
other than what we're doing.
What happens?
This wandering mind is linkedto lower happiness, obviously
(12:46):
because we can't be present.
You know, if you don't takecontrol of your emotional
regulation, you risk damagingrelationships from overreactions
, chronic health problems, fromlong-term stress, burnout that
takes months or years to recoverfrom, and also you just get
into that cyclic habit.
Again I ask this question whenyou wake up this morning, what
was the things that you'reworried or stressed about?
(13:07):
Are you a person who gets upevery single morning and you're
refreshed and you're ready to goif the day had no stress?
I've never met someone likethat.
Maybe you are out there, butsurely there's times that you're
struggling and worrying aboutfailure or Groundhog Day things,
where you do stress aboutcertain things over and over
again.
So just remember, when youmaster your emotional regulation
(13:30):
, you respond instead of reactand you stop spiraling into what
if?
Thinking.
You feel more energy, clarityand peace.
And you know what?
Here's another hidden secretPeople love energy.
People are attracted to energy.
They want to be around.
We want to be around people whoare leading and know where
they're going.
Look, here's some action stepsfor a week.
Number one name one emotion perday as it comes up.
(13:52):
Just name it.
All right, write it down, sayit out loud, put it on a
whiteboard.
Whatever you want to do, justname it.
Two practice one brain hack,breathe, gratitude movement.
Just do it daily.
Just practice one.
It doesn't have to be for long.
And number three use a5-4-3-2-1 grounding at least
(14:13):
once when you feel triggered anddon't rush the process.
It's two minutes.
It's two minutes In a 24-hourday.
We might sleep for seven oreight hours.
You can find two minutes in a16-hour day to do that.
No one's not too busy for twominutes.
Okay, so here's some generalprompts.
Number one what emotions do Ifeel most often and what
(14:35):
patterns do I notice?
Write it down, please.
Again.
What gets measured, improved?
What emotions do you feel mostoften and what patterns do you
notice?
With that, we're identifyingour neural pathways there.
Number two when in your day doyou feel most in control of your
emotions?
Write down when usually in yourday.
And two when are you least incontrol?
(14:55):
So mine's definitely when Iwake up and the kids are still
in bed and I make my firstcoffee and start to do some work
, and that's when I feel incontrol of my emotions.
Definitely then Leasing control, probably in between
appointments, driving the car tothe next appointment and need
to be at my best and stressedout with time and location and
making sure I'm in the rightframe of mind for that person to
(15:17):
help.
When's yours?
And number three, if your brainis rewiring itself every single
day which it does what newpatterns do you want to create?
Because you are the captain ofa ship and your brain is not
your enemy, it's actually yourally and you can change your
emotional patterns.
You can build a calmer andstronger mind.
(15:43):
Start small, repeat often andlet neuroplasticity do the rest.
And if this episode has helpedyou, share it with someone who
might need it.
And next week we're tackling atopic we all need to hear about,
and that's resilience andself-esteem.
Thanks for joining me on GWMSpoken.
(16:04):
Thank you.
Welcome to another edition of GW Unspoken, where we
discuss stuff I don't typicallytalk about but probably should.
And we've just finished ourseries of health, of the innate
code the eight things of fuelthat makes up holistic health
and well-being.
And if you haven't had a chanceto listen to those podcasts,
maybe go back and have a listento some of those things that may
have well, I guess may resonatewith you, but also that maybe
I'll pass on to other people whomay be struggling in life or
(00:40):
just want to try and improve afew things.
And everything we do on thepodcast is being researched and
also based on neuroscience.
So I'm just a massive fan ofneuroscience after working with
Stronger Brains, because it'sneuroscience, it's our brains
are the captain of the ship.
So while we try and get that inthe best place we can, we're
starting a new series now thathopefully you'll find
(01:02):
interesting, and I love yourfeedback.
I love people who are writingin and asking to add certain
things or help with some of thesituations they've got.
If I can, that'd be great.
Again, happy to research andtry and find some information,
but today I really want to talkabout what are the main things
that we struggle with?
What are the main things westruggle with?
Socially and emotionally,because we are humans, are
emotional beings.
We don't often work on logic.
(01:28):
I think one time I went into aplace to buy a dishwasher and I
was trying to get.
We had a new house, I wastrying to get a new dishwasher
and at least getting some quotes.
And I remember walking out witha coffee machine.
I'm like what the hell justhappened?
And we get home, plug it in,all excited and as I was
plugging in, I'm going there'sstill a hole in the space, space
where the dishwasher issupposed to be.
But I've now got a coffeemachine.
What just happened?
And it's just buying an emotion.
The sales guy was obviouslyawesome and I was very weak, but
(01:50):
at the end of the day, we areemotional people and it doesn't
necessarily mean we work onlogic all the time.
So, look, when your mind feelslike a battlefield, how can you
find calm and regain control?
And again, we're talking aboutmental health and emotional
regulation for yourself rightnow.
And before you go oh, this istoo deep, whatever.
(02:11):
How are you traveling right now, like if you're listening to
this podcast, and no matterwhere you be gym walking, dog
sitting at home.
I don't know, maybe you'restarting to cook, maybe you're
just on the way to work, way toschool.
How are you traveling with yourrelationships?
How are you traveling with yourinner connection?
How are you traveling withyourself?
What are some things that youstruggle with every single day?
What are some things that arelike Groundhog Day, which means
(02:34):
they just happen over and overagain and it's actually not
improving?
So you know, this affectseveryone.
So I want you to think aboutthis.
Have you ever felt anxious,burnout or emotional all over
the place?
This episode's for you becausehere's one thing You're not
broken.
Your brain's actually doingwhat it's designed to do, but it
(02:54):
can be rewired and that's theimportant thing to understand.
You, the listener.
You want to feel in control ofyour emotions.
You want to wake up without aknot in your stomach, go through
the day without snapping atpeople and maybe sleep without
your brain running on high alertor the high reel every single
day, thinking about the awkwardthings you've done throughout
the day.
(03:15):
You know, sometimes people justlive on the edge and that's a
big problem.
You know, sometimes people'sanxiety just whispers what if
this all goes wrong?
Or your depression says what'sthe point.
You know your stress is youworking from place to place for
survival instead of strategy,and that's what our brains are
designed to do.
They look to go away fromdanger, and so they look for
(03:39):
survival.
They look for all the dangersall the time.
And here's a saving truth, afact I got from the World Health
Organization.
It says that one in eightpeople worldwide live with a
diagnosed mental health disorder, and you've got to think about
it.
Many more are undiagnosed andthey're silently struggling, and
that's why I asked you to start.
How are you actually traveling?
Because, internally, mostpeople are exhausted, not just
(04:03):
physically but emotionally, andwhen people can't regulate their
emotions and, for example, youcan't regulate your emotion it
impacts, yeah, your work andyour health, but it also impacts
those people around you and allthose important relationships
that you probably need in yourlife.
And don't worry, I've beenthere, burning out, running on
empty, feeling like my emotionswere in the driver's seat.
But look, here's the good newsyour brain is not fixed, and
(04:27):
some people have heard aboutthis before, and neuroscience
has come a long way in the last10, 12 years, but I think, even
when I was teaching, it's reallyimportant that, once the
students understood their brainscould change and they had the
ability to rewire itself.
It means they could understand,have power to know they could
change the way they could think,feel and react at any age.
(04:48):
And you're no different.
And this isn't about pretendingeverything's fine.
It's about building a mentaltoolkit to navigate life's ups
and downs without losing yourtrue, authentic self.
So here's a three-stepframework we'll walk through
today really quickly.
There's three things I want youto think about.
Number one pause and name it.
(05:10):
And that means this talks aboutwhy labeling your emotions
takes away their power Reallyimportant.
Done this before forrelationships Really important,
this one.
Number two rewire the smallhabits.
Use micro-practices to retrainyour brain.
You know we do the same thing.
Most of us do the same thing80% of the time, and we think
the same thing 80% fromyesterday to today.
(05:33):
80%, right.
If you're driving to work ordriving to school or riding your
bike, whatever, are you goingexactly the same way you always
do.
Oh yes, gabe, it's faster.
We do the same thingsubconsciously 80% of the time.
And the third thing anchor inthe present.
We just finished themindfulness series, but granting
yourself so you're not livingin the future or past is so
(05:55):
important for your mental healthand social-emotional regulation
, all right.
So again, don't just listen tothis episode and nod along.
Pick one of these tools Ishared today and actually try it
this week and see how theneuroscience or the
neuroplasticity works, see howrepetition builds new neural
pathways and see if there's achange in your behavior and your
connections and therefore,maybe your improvement in your
(06:17):
mental health.
Okay, here's the first one.
Ready, pause and name it.
Your amygdala, that part ofyour brain that's responsible
for fear and emotionalreactivity, calms down when you
label what you're feeling.
So, instead of saying I'mlosing it, say something like
I'm feeling anxious because I'mworried I'm going to miss this
deadline, right, rather than say, oh, I just hate driving to
(06:40):
work every single day, just saywe just get so frustrated being
banked up in traffic everysingle day, it just costs me so
much time.
Name it.
Name it I'm frustrated, allright.
And then say the reason why.
Um, an american study foundthat effectively labeling things
puts feelings into words andthat significantly reduces the
(07:03):
activity in the amygdala, thatemotional center of your brain,
and that allows your prefrontalcortex, that rational brain,
that thinking party brain, toactually take the lead.
So try it.
I don't want to swear at yourpeople around you, but try and
say it.
Just pause and name how you'refeeling.
I'm feeling frustrated becausethis breakup I'm really, it's
breaking my heart.
This has happened.
(07:23):
I don't know if I'll ever getover this, but I'm so sad right
now.
All right, put it on paper,have a journal, say it out loud,
say it to yourself in themirror.
All right doesn't mean you'regoing to be perfect the next day
or two minutes later, but itactually starts getting that
emotional brain calmed downbecause your thinking brain,
(07:43):
more rational, comes over andresides in what's.
That's what we need.
All right, try it, no matterhow silly it sounds.
Number two rewire those smallhabits.
You know neuroscience workslike this.
Neurons that fire together workto wire together.
So if you constantly rehearsestress in your brain, it becomes
more and more stress.
If you rehearse calm, even inmicrobursts, your brain starts
(08:05):
to default there.
So that sounds really easy todo.
And it's not easy to do I'm notsaying it is, but whatever you
constantly rehearse in yourthoughts becomes reality,
because that's how our neuralpathways work.
They become thicker andstronger on what we keep telling
it.
So what are you telling yourbrain every single day what are
the things.
You wake up in the morning andgo bang straight into instant
(08:26):
stress.
How can we start rewiring thoselittle things, those little
microbursts, to change that?
So here's some little hacks thatwe might be able to use.
Have a two-minute breath reset.
So do a four, seven, eightbreathing and I found this
really hard at the start soinhale for four through your
nose, so a really deep inhalebreath, hold for a massive seven
(08:49):
seconds.
So hold it and then breathe outslowly through your mouth for
eight seconds.
Alright, I was too worriedabout the numbers when I first
did that, but after a while youdo maybe three or four sets of
that.
It's just crazy how much thatcan actually slow things down
like that.
Too worried about the numberswhen I first did that, but after
a while you do maybe three orfour sets of that.
It's just crazy how much thatcan actually slow things down.
Like that's a minute and a half, a minute and a half, two
(09:09):
minutes to reset.
Everyone can find two minutesof the day.
All right, how about this secondone for a brain hack?
Become maybe a gratitude shift.
So write down three things youappreciate, even if they're tiny
.
What are three things right now?
You know the power you get whenyou actually text someone, a
friend, et cetera, how gratefulyou are for them and why, like,
the feeling you get when yousend that message is amazing.
(09:32):
And if they send something backand say, look, thanks, that's
awesome, we appreciate you too.
It's like a double dopamine hit.
You know, I tried that with mywife once sending her flowers.
She asked what I did wrong.
But it's important you actuallysay those words and get
yourself out there and bevulnerable, because that's how
you actually you know connectanyway, when you feel like you
belong and can be vulnerable.
(09:52):
All right, here's another brainhack.
Movement triggers Stand, stretch, walk every hour to break the
stress cycle.
We know that cortisol builds upin the body, testosterone
builds up in the body.
It can actually have thatfeeling of tight tension if you
can't get rid of that release,that emotional release and
physical release.
Get up, move, stretch.
(10:13):
Just do it for short bursts.
Again, we tell ourselves we'retoo busy to do these things.
Get up and move, get thatcortisol out of your body Again.
That can help you feel morecalm.
Relaxing medulla, the emotionalcenter, prefrontal cortex,
switches on thinking part ofyour brain More logical, less
stress Makes sense.
(10:38):
Okay, and here's number threeanchor in the present.
We talked about three things.
So the first one we talkedabout was pause and aim it.
Second one rewire the smallhabits.
Third anchor in the present.
So anxiety pulls you into thefuture.
Depression drags you into thepast, so mindfulness plants you
in the now.
It sort of breaks both of thosecycles of anxiety and
depression.
So, again, simple groundingexercises.
I love doing this with a groupof TAFE students once, and some
(10:58):
are up to 65 years old and somewere as young as 16, 17.
But we did this one.
We went outside and we were allstanding on the veranda out at
I think it was Bracken RidgeTAFE.
I said, right, nice and quiet,everyone, just for a couple of
minutes, and I'm going to getyour feedback at the end, but I
want you to be present.
And we did the four, seven,eight, breath.
(11:19):
And then after that I said well,name five things you can see in
your brain.
Don't say it loud.
And then I went okay, what'sfour things you can feel right
now?
So it would be your clothes onyour skin, your hands on the
rail, you know, the breezehitting your face, your hair
hitting your face, whatever itmight be.
You know three things.
You can hear, two things youcan actually smell which is
(11:43):
actually a hard one to do andone thing you can taste.
There's something still in yourmouth you've had for lunch or
you've had a drink.
From it you can still taste.
And that 5, 4, 3, 2, 1grounding exercise really gets
people focused on the now, andI've had a couple of people at
the end of that actually saythis is awesome.
Can we connect outside just tochat about some other strategies
(12:04):
you've got, because I feel mybrain is always thinking in the
future and I do feel anxious Trythose ones out.
You've got nothing to lose ifnothing has changed so far.
Here's another.
I'd love to do the research toback up what we're talking about
, but Harvard research foundthat people spend 47% of their
waking hours thinking aboutsomething other than what
they're doing.
People spend 47% of theirwaking hours thinking about
(12:24):
something other than whatthey're doing.
You know, donald Miller, who'sa massive into marketing, says
that our brains 30% of the timeare actually off wandering.
They're not actually focused.
So if 47% of our waking hoursis thinking about something
other than what we're doing.
What happens?
This wandering mind is linkedto lower happiness, obviously
(12:46):
because we can't be present.
You know, if you don't takecontrol of your emotional
regulation, you risk damagingrelationships from overreactions
, chronic health problems, fromlong-term stress, burnout that
takes months or years to recoverfrom, and also you just get
into that cyclic habit.
Again I ask this question whenyou wake up this morning, what
was the things that you'reworried or stressed about?
(13:07):
Are you a person who gets upevery single morning and you're
refreshed and you're ready to goif the day had no stress?
I've never met someone likethat.
Maybe you are out there, butsurely there's times that you're
struggling and worrying aboutfailure or Groundhog Day things,
where you do stress aboutcertain things over and over
again.
So just remember, when youmaster your emotional regulation
(13:30):
, you respond instead of reactand you stop spiraling into what
if?
Thinking.
You feel more energy, clarityand peace.
And you know what?
Here's another hidden secretPeople love energy.
People are attracted to energy.
They want to be around.
We want to be around people whoare leading and know where
they're going.
Look, here's some action stepsfor a week.
Number one name one emotion perday as it comes up.
(13:52):
Just name it.
All right, write it down, sayit out loud, put it on a
whiteboard.
Whatever you want to do, justname it.
Two practice one brain hack,breathe, gratitude movement.
Just do it daily.
Just practice one.
It doesn't have to be for long.
And number three use a5-4-3-2-1 grounding at least
(14:13):
once when you feel triggered anddon't rush the process.
It's two minutes.
It's two minutes In a 24-hourday.
We might sleep for seven oreight hours.
You can find two minutes in a16-hour day to do that.
No one's not too busy for twominutes.
Okay, so here's some generalprompts.
Number one what emotions do Ifeel most often and what
(14:35):
patterns do I notice?
Write it down, please.
Again.
What gets measured, improved?
What emotions do you feel mostoften and what patterns do you
notice?
With that, we're identifyingour neural pathways there.
Number two when in your day doyou feel most in control of your
emotions?
Write down when usually in yourday.
And two when are you least incontrol?
(14:55):
So mine's definitely when Iwake up and the kids are still
in bed and I make my firstcoffee and start to do some work
, and that's when I feel incontrol of my emotions.
Definitely then Leasing control, probably in between
appointments, driving the car tothe next appointment and need
to be at my best and stressedout with time and location and
making sure I'm in the rightframe of mind for that person to
(15:17):
help.
When's yours?
And number three, if your brainis rewiring itself every single
day which it does what newpatterns do you want to create?
Because you are the captain ofa ship and your brain is not
your enemy, it's actually yourally and you can change your
emotional patterns.
You can build a calmer andstronger mind.
(15:43):
Start small, repeat often andlet neuroplasticity do the rest.
And if this episode has helpedyou, share it with someone who
might need it.
And next week we're tackling atopic we all need to hear about,
and that's resilience andself-esteem.
Thanks for joining me on GWMSpoken.
(16:04):
Thank you.
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