July 25, 2025 • 22 mins
Ever wondered why your child's behaviour triggers such intense emotions in you? The answer might lie not in your parenting techniques, but in your own childhood experiences.
Sam Jockel, founder of Parent TV and producer of the award-winning documentary SEEN, joins the GW Unspoken podcast to explore how healing our own wounds transforms our parenting. After reaching over 30,000 Australian parents through 300+ community screenings, SEEN is finally coming home to Redcliffe, where much of it was filmed and where three of its four featured parents reside.
The documentary challenges conventional parenting wisdom by shifting focus from controlling children's behaviour to understanding parents' emotional landscapes first. "Our kids need something from us that they don't know how to ask for in the right ways," Sam explains, noting that when those needs aren't met, children's behaviours often wrongly become labelled as "the problem." This revolutionary perspective places the parent-child relationship at the heart of human development and mental wellbeing.
What makes SEEN truly powerful is its portrayal of ordinary people showing extraordinary courage. These aren't celebrities or experts, but everyday Redcliffe parents brave enough to confront their past trauma, shame, and generational patterns on camera. Sam describes them as "heroes" whose stories create "a container and scaffolding" allowing all parents to acknowledge their struggles with a collective "me too." This shared vulnerability breaks isolation and creates pathways toward healing.
Despite addressing difficult truths, the film balances honesty with profound hope. As Sam puts it: "We can't cherry-pick just the good bits of being human. When we try, we get taken over by the bad bits." By embracing our full emotional range and approaching ourselves with compassion rather than judgment, we can break cycles affecting generations.
Join us for this special screening at 1 Richens Street, Redcliffe on Saturday at 3pm (doors open 2:30pm), followed by a Q&A with Sam and participating parents. This free event, supported by Uniting Care, Redcliffe Uniting Church Community Hub, and City of Moreton Bay, offers a rare opportunity to participate in a parenting revolution happening right in our community.
www.in8code.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 2 (00:16):
Welcome to another edition of GW Unspoken, where we
discuss stuff we don'ttypically talk about, but we
probably should, and I've gottwo very special guests on the
line.
I've got one person across fromme, tim, how are you?
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Very good, thank you.
Thanks, gary.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Yeah, and I've got Sam on the line.
How are you, sam?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Yeah, good, good, glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Well, it's our privilege.
Actually, we're going to getinto speaking about you in a
moment and what the greatattractions that's coming up
here in Redcliffe on thePeninsula, but First of all I
want to drill down on Tim.
Tim, can you let us know just abrief of your position and
where you are at the moment?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Yeah, yeah.
So on the Redcliffe PeninsulaI'm connected into Redcliffe
Uniting Church and Uniting Careand my role here is youth and
community chaplain and so I getinvolved in lots of different
community events.
Yesterday we had a technologysafety day, lots of stuff around
the homelessness and mentalhealth and, yeah, supporting the
community however I I can.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
So yeah, also, and we've known each other for
probably a couple of years nowand people out there who's
listening will know that he's avery humble man.
He doesn't like accolades verymuch about himself but does a
massive amount for the community, a lot of his own bat, which is
huge.
But let's talk about today.
You've invited us in today totalk about um sam sam jockel and
give us a brief rundown aboutwhat's happening then, and we
(01:28):
can maybe we can quiz sam.
It was.
So what's going on there?
Speaker 1 (01:31):
yeah, fantastic thanks, gary.
Yeah, so I've known sam for anumber of years almost just over
20 years and, um, and seeingsome of the work that sam's done
has been really inspiring.
Um, and we don't have timetoday to go through all of the
different entrepreneurial,different ventures that Sam's
done, but also, yeah,contributing and supporting the
(01:52):
community and and knowing Sam'sfamily for a long time as well.
So, yeah, when the vision ofthis documentary that Sam's been
working on I got to know aboutthis, it was like this is such
an important topic, such animportant message that we've got
to dive into and, yeah, I justwanted to support it as much as
(02:15):
we can.
So, yeah, we've been on a bitof a journey over the last how
long would it be, sam?
Probably about 10 months ofbringing together a whole bunch
of different projects andactivities and ideas and, yeah,
really looking forward to thescreening this weekend.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
And Sam, we just want to get you involved here and
talk about so.
We'd love to hear some dirt onTimmy.
We'll leave that to anothertime, but you're coming here, I
believe, on Saturday.
Yeah.
And you're going to bescreening and launching the
scene film.
So do you mind just taking us abit around that?
Speaker 3 (02:49):
Yeah, yeah, no worries.
So I mean, scene is probably apiece of work that was two years
in the making to actuallyproduce the documentary, but
sometimes I say maybe 17 yearsin the making since I became a
parent myself.
Um, and we looked at about Idon't know three months ago now,
(03:13):
um to, I guess, the public, andI mean since then we started
with kind of 15 across thecountry and we've now had over
300 community screenings and Ithink over 30,000 parents have
seen the film.
Um, and really it was a bigpiece of work very centered on,
(03:35):
um, I guess, parenting, butreally looking at it through a
different lens, and so not on,not only am I the producer of
scene, but I also founded acompany about 10 years ago
called Parent TV and that is alittle bit like Netflix for
parenting resources and there'sover 2000 videos on that
(03:55):
platform, but they're just kindof five minute videos really
just answering questions parentsare asking about parenting.
And it was through that journeyof, I guess, founding Parent TV
probably having three childrenmyself that are now 17, 15 and
11, that I really started to seethere was more going on than
(04:22):
just how our kids were behaving.
That was shaping what washappening for our kids, and I
think you know a lot of thenarrative around parenting.
A lot of the content aroundparenting for a really long time
was very much focused on ourchildren and their behavior and
trying to get them to behavedifferently often, so we didn't
(04:46):
have to feel our feelings aroundthat.
But this documentary is really,you know, bringing to the light
of day and a different lens ofwhat does it mean to look at
parenting and actually lookingat us as the parents in our
behaviour, rather than beingfocused on the child, and really
that piece of work around kindof understanding how did we get
(05:12):
here and a little bit of whathappened to us as kids as well
and how that might be showing upin kind of family dynamics and
really when, if we really wantto help our kids, the first
place we have to start isactually really supporting and
helping ourselves as a parent.
So it's a bit of a conversationabout that, I think, and just
(05:33):
really bringing to the light ofday what does that mean?
How does that work?
Um, and that piece aroundhealing kind of generational
trauma, um, yeah, and it's, youknow, really resonated Like we
the documentary has, we've wonawards, we've been in festivals
(05:53):
Like those 300 screenings haveliterally been driven by people
in community, similar to whatTim's doing here in Ratcliffe.
But the beautiful thing aboutthis film and Ratcliffe is like
I'm the producer of the film andI live in Ratcliffe, have done
so for 20 years, and three ofthe parents out of four of the
parents in the film actuallylive in Ratcliffe too, and like
(06:13):
half of the film was filmed inRatcliffe.
So when people see it, I meanfor me that really you know this
is our place, this is our lives, this is our lives, these are
our people and, yeah, I'mexcited to be able to have the
screening tomorrow here.
This is the first actualscreening in Ratcliffe I believe
(06:35):
that we've had as a place whereyou know so much of this story
is actually real to this place.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
So good and I guess the way you talk to me at the
moment or talking to us at themoment is it feels like you know
, when you get on the plane andthey say that you have to look
after yourself first when theoxygen mask comes down, to make
sure you can help those aroundyou, and that's sort of the
message.
I'm trying to get at that parentwellbeing.
If you don't mind me asking,I'd love to know the passion,
the drive like where did wheredid parent tv originate?
Like, why did you startfounding these programs?
(07:07):
What was the thing thatinspired you to do that?
Speaker 3 (07:11):
yeah, um, sometimes I think I've done businesses my
whole life, kind of neveractually worked for anybody.
Ironically, that's my new likecuriosity.
I'm having a job, but that's awhole other thing.
I think somewhere in my brainand the businesses I've always
(07:40):
run have also somehow beingconnected to a problem I'm
trying to solve in my life.
So I've just been veryefficient in going.
This thing needs my attentionand I don't know how to give it
my attention with all the otherthings I have to do in my life.
Oh, I know how Turn it into abusiness, because then it's your
work and also it's this problemthat you're trying to solve.
(08:01):
And I think early on, like whenI had children and I like
became a mother, I do actuallyfeel like something wasn't right
and there was always somethingwithin me that was like there's
something I don't understandhere that's really important and
(08:22):
I really need to give that myattention.
I don't think it was like asuper conscious thing for me at
that time.
I really honour that, sam,because I'm like oh, that was
amazing that you knew enough todo something and you had no idea
what you didn't know.
That I know now, 20 years downthe line.
(08:42):
So I'm like like I liked her.
You know she went after tryingto solve problems and really had
no idea what she was gettingherself into or what she was
about to uncover in you know,caring about this.
So I think it to be honest, Ithink it really started with me
(09:04):
trying to.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yeah, as a mother.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Yeah, like, and knowing this job that I have is
really important andacknowledging, on some level, I
need help, and I think Iprojected that onto other people
, like, oh, people are, you know, like the truth is.
I think it started with oh, Ican see that people are really
struggling and need help withthis, like, I'm good at helping
(09:29):
people, I'll do something, andwhich landed with.
I actually was reallystruggling and needed help with
this and once I realized thiswas my work to do and I did that
, that's.
You know, I feel like the workI do now is much healthier
because it's not because it's um, I just see more clearly what's
(09:50):
going on.
But yeah, I think I justrealized early on this was
really important and if I'velearned anything through all the
research and all the work thatwe've done and the documentary,
I was actually right.
Like the foundational brainbuilding blocks of humanity, of
(10:10):
us, of our kids and of us, isactually embedded in the
parent-child relationship andit's heavy to actually say that
because that's a bigresponsibility and something
that I think we're not hasn'tbeen really clear, but is
becoming clearer in terms ofsome of the research and what
(10:32):
we're just starting to unpackand discover about the
importance of that.
And I think, like with twoworking parents now often out
and the shift in what thatenvironment looks like for our
kids, we are actually startingto see the impact of that now in
(10:54):
terms of this big wave of kids,with lots of mental health
issues going on and a wholerange of different things.
And I think part of what'shappening is we're starting to
see there was actually that wasan important role.
There's an important thinggoing on there that we kind of
(11:16):
missed because as society wetend to not really value things
that aren't productive and don'tmake money and we have to
really face what does that mean?
That there's actually thesereally important things that if
we don't get right, theconsequences are actually quite
substantial and like arethinking needs to happen
(11:39):
around that.
I mean.
I think that's all part of theconversation, but I don't know.
I think I just trusted myselfearly on, to be honest, that
there was more going on herethat needed my attention and I
don't know.
And we're starting to seethat's true, like our kids need
something from us that theydon't know how to ask for in the
(12:02):
right ways.
When they're not getting it, itoften comes at us in you know
behaviours that say you're theproblem, this kid is the problem
, but it's like no, there'sactually something going on
behind that and it's our job, asthe adults to you know to know,
to try and help them understandthat rather than just get angry
(12:26):
at them for that.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
Sam, you've been courageous your whole life.
You have dived into a wholebunch of stuff headfirst, with a
lot of bravery and a lot ofcourage, and just hearing you
share some of that, some of yourstory and some of the vision
and the message behind some ofthis the scene film it does take
courage, and seeing the film,the four parents that are
(12:54):
involved in this show so muchcourage, so much bravery, not
just sharing their story andbeing so vulnerable with some of
their experiences in parenting,but to go on that journey of
growth, personal growth andhealing and transformation for
themselves and their families.
(13:14):
So I'm wondering if you canreflect on that and also, I
guess, the people that are goingto come and watch this
screening tomorrow, saturdayafternoon.
There is an element of it doestake a lot of courage to dive
into your own childhood traumaor your own coping mechanisms
and a whole bunch of stuff.
(13:35):
And so, yeah, can you reflecton that, of that bravery that's
required from the parentsinvolved in the film, but also
the parents that will come andsee the film?
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Yeah, absolutely.
Look, I think this is thebiggest and hardest piece of
work that any of us can do,really, in terms of really being
honest about what happened toyou first and how that felt and
(14:08):
what that resulted in, and then,at the same time, holding maybe
how you pass that on, becausewe pass it on until, unless we
acknowledge it, then it's justpassed on, because we're just
running that without theacknowledgement of it.
Um, and it's often in the lead,um, and I mean the three
(14:33):
parents in the film like part ofthe reason they're from rick
cliff and is because you knowthe people.
I know they were my friends,they were the heroes in my world
of people that I knew everydayparents you know they weren't
well resourced who were braveenough to face the flames of.
(14:54):
You know the hard stuff, thepain, um, the shame, and I
witnessed them over years.
Do that?
And I guess I watched TV likeeverybody else and always see
these heroes of stories with allthe things and all the
celebrity, and I'm like, no, Ithink there's more going on.
(15:16):
I think there are actuallyamazing heroes out there who
nobody even knows who they are.
Some of them I know and youknow it felt like a privilege to
be able to shine a light onsome of those people who I feel
like are actually extraordinary,brave and courageous humans,
(15:38):
but also wanted to show peoplewhat's possible, that these
people are just like the rest ofus.
In some ways there's nothingspecial about them, but there's
nothing special about any of usthat isn't about them.
But we're all just in thistogether and I feel like for me,
(16:03):
this movement is a little bitlike me too, like it's every
single one of us.
It's not like there's nothingwrong with any individual and I
think when you start to get yourhead around that it's all of us
and we've all been hurt andhurt other people.
It takes the power away fromthinking there's something wrong
(16:27):
with me while everybody else isfine, because I think a lot of
people feel like that, that it'sjust them.
But the more people talk aboutit and bring it up, it kind of
creates a container and ascaffolding where it gives all
of us permission together to saykind of me too, and then the
(16:49):
power of often what is holdingus back or what is in the lead
and driving us to sometimes notbe at our best starts to break,
and we can do that together andso I don't know, I just
encourage people.
The film is really filled with alot of compassion and a lot of
(17:10):
hope.
So you know, the feedback thatwe've had about it has been you
know, there's a lot oftruth-telling and people have
liked that, and sometimestruth-telling can be quite heavy
.
Of truth-telling, and peoplehave liked that, and sometimes
truth-telling can be quite heavy, but held at the same time as
those truths are also um, somuch compassion and so much hope
(17:31):
and so much possibility andit's all in there.
And I just said that's the fullhuman experience.
Like we can't cherry pick justthe good bits and when we try we
just get taken over by the badbits.
Like part of our job is tounderstand what does it mean to
be human?
And it means love and joy andshame and grief and jealousy and
(17:52):
it's all of it.
Like it's all of it for all ofus and it's about welcoming it
and leaning into the hard ratherthan just trying to say, not
those bits, just these ones,because that, like you are to
think that you have, to thinkthat you can control.
(18:15):
That is like the ultimateliable, that none of us are
actually in control of any of it.
In a way, life will happen tous and our job is to welcome it
rather than try and control it.
And so, yeah, I don't know,there's just lots in there.
(18:37):
The doco, yeah, it's just abeautiful story of four parents
who said, uh, who were honestand open and courageous and
vulnerable, and it shows what'spossible and what's on the other
side of doing that.
And I think, you know, thoseare the stories that inspire me
(19:00):
me, and we've put that out inthe world to, I guess, hopefully
inspire others too.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
Yep, that's great.
One of the first things I canremember when I saw it for the
first time and thinking it isconfronting as you dive into
your own experience, as you'rewatching it and thinking about
reflecting on your own life andparenting.
But there was this one line atthe very end.
That was that hope that there'salways hope that you can change
(19:30):
the situation or you can changethe course that you're on.
And yeah, so it is a fantasticdocumentary, very, very well
done.
But it does provide someamazing hope that we can change
the course and find personalgrowth and healing that can
(19:53):
impact our families.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , yeah, so yeah, yeah, I'm
looking forward to it and alsoalso coming from a local, I
can't get better than that.
So, and um, obviously weappreciate your time, sam, for
coming on the podcast it's sucha late notice.
But also we can promote thecommunity to get people out here
to actually, you know, toactually understand their own
(20:16):
journey, to maybe give them sometips and tricks and to realize
that you know that word hope,but also that we are all just
learning and to be the bestperson we can.
We do have to look afterourselves.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
So I can't wait.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
So Saturday it's all on here at 3 pm at 1 Richmond
Street at Redcliffe.
Can't wait to meet you and Tim.
You'll be here, obviously, tohelp on the ground and welcome
everybody in, and there's a Q&Aas well.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah.
So if people wanted to arrivefrom 2.30 onwards, we're going
to have some food and some.
Yeah, you can register from2.30 onwards.
Screening will start at 3.
Yeah, and then we'll have a Q&Awith Sam and some of the
parents before some food at theend.
So fantastic event tomorrowafternoon.
And if I can just acknowledgeyeah, acknowledge the work of
(21:03):
Uniting Care, some of theRedcliffe team have put this
together, along with some of thepeople from the Redcliffe
Uniting Church and Community Hub, and also thanks to the City of
Bourne Bay for a financialgrant that has made this
possible to be free.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
Yeah, fantastic.
And Sam, I just want to thankyou also for getting Tim on the
podcast.
I've tried for two years butsince you've come along we've
eventually got him on it.
I've got a couple of picturesof him so you can see.
It's actually him across fromme right now.
Bit of a start of something new.
He's a natural.
But, sam, can't wait and loveyour wealth of knowledge, love
how you talk from the heart andeven humble enough to talk about
(21:42):
how it's.
Come from your own beginnings,where you know obviously you've
delved in, yes, to make abusiness out of it, but it's out
of your passion to be a betterparent and also to serve others,
so it's just beautiful.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
So thank you.
Yeah, no worries, thanks forthe chat Look forward to seeing
you tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Thanks, Gary.
Speaker 3 (21:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Thanks, Sam.
Welcome to another edition of GW Unspoken, where we
discuss stuff we don'ttypically talk about, but we
probably should, and I've gottwo very special guests on the
line.
I've got one person across fromme, tim, how are you?
Speaker 1 (00:25):
Very good, thank you.
Thanks, gary.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Yeah, and I've got Sam on the line.
How are you, sam?
Speaker 3 (00:30):
Yeah, good, good, glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Well, it's our privilege.
Actually, we're going to getinto speaking about you in a
moment and what the greatattractions that's coming up
here in Redcliffe on thePeninsula, but First of all I
want to drill down on Tim.
Tim, can you let us know just abrief of your position and
where you are at the moment?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Yeah, yeah.
So on the Redcliffe PeninsulaI'm connected into Redcliffe
Uniting Church and Uniting Careand my role here is youth and
community chaplain and so I getinvolved in lots of different
community events.
Yesterday we had a technologysafety day, lots of stuff around
the homelessness and mentalhealth and, yeah, supporting the
community however I I can.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
So yeah, also, and we've known each other for
probably a couple of years nowand people out there who's
listening will know that he's avery humble man.
He doesn't like accolades verymuch about himself but does a
massive amount for the community, a lot of his own bat, which is
huge.
But let's talk about today.
You've invited us in today totalk about um sam sam jockel and
give us a brief rundown aboutwhat's happening then, and we
(01:28):
can maybe we can quiz sam.
It was.
So what's going on there?
Speaker 1 (01:31):
yeah, fantastic thanks, gary.
Yeah, so I've known sam for anumber of years almost just over
20 years and, um, and seeingsome of the work that sam's done
has been really inspiring.
Um, and we don't have timetoday to go through all of the
different entrepreneurial,different ventures that Sam's
done, but also, yeah,contributing and supporting the
(01:52):
community and and knowing Sam'sfamily for a long time as well.
So, yeah, when the vision ofthis documentary that Sam's been
working on I got to know aboutthis, it was like this is such
an important topic, such animportant message that we've got
to dive into and, yeah, I justwanted to support it as much as
(02:15):
we can.
So, yeah, we've been on a bitof a journey over the last how
long would it be, sam?
Probably about 10 months ofbringing together a whole bunch
of different projects andactivities and ideas and, yeah,
really looking forward to thescreening this weekend.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
And Sam, we just want to get you involved here and
talk about so.
We'd love to hear some dirt onTimmy.
We'll leave that to anothertime, but you're coming here, I
believe, on Saturday.
Yeah.
And you're going to bescreening and launching the
scene film.
So do you mind just taking us abit around that?
Speaker 3 (02:49):
Yeah, yeah, no worries.
So I mean, scene is probably apiece of work that was two years
in the making to actuallyproduce the documentary, but
sometimes I say maybe 17 yearsin the making since I became a
parent myself.
Um, and we looked at about Idon't know three months ago now,
(03:13):
um to, I guess, the public, andI mean since then we started
with kind of 15 across thecountry and we've now had over
300 community screenings and Ithink over 30,000 parents have
seen the film.
Um, and really it was a bigpiece of work very centered on,
(03:35):
um, I guess, parenting, butreally looking at it through a
different lens, and so not on,not only am I the producer of
scene, but I also founded acompany about 10 years ago
called Parent TV and that is alittle bit like Netflix for
parenting resources and there'sover 2000 videos on that
(03:55):
platform, but they're just kindof five minute videos really
just answering questions parentsare asking about parenting.
And it was through that journeyof, I guess, founding Parent TV
probably having three childrenmyself that are now 17, 15 and
11, that I really started to seethere was more going on than
(04:22):
just how our kids were behaving.
That was shaping what washappening for our kids, and I
think you know a lot of thenarrative around parenting.
A lot of the content aroundparenting for a really long time
was very much focused on ourchildren and their behavior and
trying to get them to behavedifferently often, so we didn't
(04:46):
have to feel our feelings aroundthat.
But this documentary is really,you know, bringing to the light
of day and a different lens ofwhat does it mean to look at
parenting and actually lookingat us as the parents in our
behaviour, rather than beingfocused on the child, and really
that piece of work around kindof understanding how did we get
(05:12):
here and a little bit of whathappened to us as kids as well
and how that might be showing upin kind of family dynamics and
really when, if we really wantto help our kids, the first
place we have to start isactually really supporting and
helping ourselves as a parent.
So it's a bit of a conversationabout that, I think, and just
(05:33):
really bringing to the light ofday what does that mean?
How does that work?
Um, and that piece aroundhealing kind of generational
trauma, um, yeah, and it's, youknow, really resonated Like we
the documentary has, we've wonawards, we've been in festivals
(05:53):
Like those 300 screenings haveliterally been driven by people
in community, similar to whatTim's doing here in Ratcliffe.
But the beautiful thing aboutthis film and Ratcliffe is like
I'm the producer of the film andI live in Ratcliffe, have done
so for 20 years, and three ofthe parents out of four of the
parents in the film actuallylive in Ratcliffe too, and like
(06:13):
half of the film was filmed inRatcliffe.
So when people see it, I meanfor me that really you know this
is our place, this is our lives, this is our lives, these are
our people and, yeah, I'mexcited to be able to have the
screening tomorrow here.
This is the first actualscreening in Ratcliffe I believe
(06:35):
that we've had as a place whereyou know so much of this story
is actually real to this place.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
So good and I guess the way you talk to me at the
moment or talking to us at themoment is it feels like you know
, when you get on the plane andthey say that you have to look
after yourself first when theoxygen mask comes down, to make
sure you can help those aroundyou, and that's sort of the
message.
I'm trying to get at that parentwellbeing.
If you don't mind me asking,I'd love to know the passion,
the drive like where did wheredid parent tv originate?
Like, why did you startfounding these programs?
(07:07):
What was the thing thatinspired you to do that?
Speaker 3 (07:11):
yeah, um, sometimes I think I've done businesses my
whole life, kind of neveractually worked for anybody.
Ironically, that's my new likecuriosity.
I'm having a job, but that's awhole other thing.
I think somewhere in my brainand the businesses I've always
(07:40):
run have also somehow beingconnected to a problem I'm
trying to solve in my life.
So I've just been veryefficient in going.
This thing needs my attentionand I don't know how to give it
my attention with all the otherthings I have to do in my life.
Oh, I know how Turn it into abusiness, because then it's your
work and also it's this problemthat you're trying to solve.
(08:01):
And I think early on, like whenI had children and I like
became a mother, I do actuallyfeel like something wasn't right
and there was always somethingwithin me that was like there's
something I don't understandhere that's really important and
(08:22):
I really need to give that myattention.
I don't think it was like asuper conscious thing for me at
that time.
I really honour that, sam,because I'm like oh, that was
amazing that you knew enough todo something and you had no idea
what you didn't know.
That I know now, 20 years downthe line.
(08:42):
So I'm like like I liked her.
You know she went after tryingto solve problems and really had
no idea what she was gettingherself into or what she was
about to uncover in you know,caring about this.
So I think it to be honest, Ithink it really started with me
(09:04):
trying to.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yeah, as a mother.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Yeah, like, and knowing this job that I have is
really important andacknowledging, on some level, I
need help, and I think Iprojected that onto other people
, like, oh, people are, you know, like the truth is.
I think it started with oh, Ican see that people are really
struggling and need help withthis, like, I'm good at helping
(09:29):
people, I'll do something, andwhich landed with.
I actually was reallystruggling and needed help with
this and once I realized thiswas my work to do and I did that
, that's.
You know, I feel like the workI do now is much healthier
because it's not because it's um, I just see more clearly what's
(09:50):
going on.
But yeah, I think I justrealized early on this was
really important and if I'velearned anything through all the
research and all the work thatwe've done and the documentary,
I was actually right.
Like the foundational brainbuilding blocks of humanity, of
(10:10):
us, of our kids and of us, isactually embedded in the
parent-child relationship andit's heavy to actually say that
because that's a bigresponsibility and something
that I think we're not hasn'tbeen really clear, but is
becoming clearer in terms ofsome of the research and what
(10:32):
we're just starting to unpackand discover about the
importance of that.
And I think, like with twoworking parents now often out
and the shift in what thatenvironment looks like for our
kids, we are actually startingto see the impact of that now in
(10:54):
terms of this big wave of kids,with lots of mental health
issues going on and a wholerange of different things.
And I think part of what'shappening is we're starting to
see there was actually that wasan important role.
There's an important thinggoing on there that we kind of
(11:16):
missed because as society wetend to not really value things
that aren't productive and don'tmake money and we have to
really face what does that mean?
That there's actually thesereally important things that if
we don't get right, theconsequences are actually quite
substantial and like arethinking needs to happen
(11:39):
around that.
I mean.
I think that's all part of theconversation, but I don't know.
I think I just trusted myselfearly on, to be honest, that
there was more going on herethat needed my attention and I
don't know.
And we're starting to seethat's true, like our kids need
something from us that theydon't know how to ask for in the
(12:02):
right ways.
When they're not getting it, itoften comes at us in you know
behaviours that say you're theproblem, this kid is the problem
, but it's like no, there'sactually something going on
behind that and it's our job, asthe adults to you know to know,
to try and help them understandthat rather than just get angry
(12:26):
at them for that.
Speaker 1 (12:29):
Sam, you've been courageous your whole life.
You have dived into a wholebunch of stuff headfirst, with a
lot of bravery and a lot ofcourage, and just hearing you
share some of that, some of yourstory and some of the vision
and the message behind some ofthis the scene film it does take
courage, and seeing the film,the four parents that are
(12:54):
involved in this show so muchcourage, so much bravery, not
just sharing their story andbeing so vulnerable with some of
their experiences in parenting,but to go on that journey of
growth, personal growth andhealing and transformation for
themselves and their families.
(13:14):
So I'm wondering if you canreflect on that and also, I
guess, the people that are goingto come and watch this
screening tomorrow, saturdayafternoon.
There is an element of it doestake a lot of courage to dive
into your own childhood traumaor your own coping mechanisms
and a whole bunch of stuff.
(13:35):
And so, yeah, can you reflecton that, of that bravery that's
required from the parentsinvolved in the film, but also
the parents that will come andsee the film?
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Yeah, absolutely.
Look, I think this is thebiggest and hardest piece of
work that any of us can do,really, in terms of really being
honest about what happened toyou first and how that felt and
(14:08):
what that resulted in, and then,at the same time, holding maybe
how you pass that on, becausewe pass it on until, unless we
acknowledge it, then it's justpassed on, because we're just
running that without theacknowledgement of it.
Um, and it's often in the lead,um, and I mean the three
(14:33):
parents in the film like part ofthe reason they're from rick
cliff and is because you knowthe people.
I know they were my friends,they were the heroes in my world
of people that I knew everydayparents you know they weren't
well resourced who were braveenough to face the flames of.
(14:54):
You know the hard stuff, thepain, um, the shame, and I
witnessed them over years.
Do that?
And I guess I watched TV likeeverybody else and always see
these heroes of stories with allthe things and all the
celebrity, and I'm like, no, Ithink there's more going on.
(15:16):
I think there are actuallyamazing heroes out there who
nobody even knows who they are.
Some of them I know and youknow it felt like a privilege to
be able to shine a light onsome of those people who I feel
like are actually extraordinary,brave and courageous humans,
(15:38):
but also wanted to show peoplewhat's possible, that these
people are just like the rest ofus.
In some ways there's nothingspecial about them, but there's
nothing special about any of usthat isn't about them.
But we're all just in thistogether and I feel like for me,
(16:03):
this movement is a little bitlike me too, like it's every
single one of us.
It's not like there's nothingwrong with any individual and I
think when you start to get yourhead around that it's all of us
and we've all been hurt andhurt other people.
It takes the power away fromthinking there's something wrong
(16:27):
with me while everybody else isfine, because I think a lot of
people feel like that, that it'sjust them.
But the more people talk aboutit and bring it up, it kind of
creates a container and ascaffolding where it gives all
of us permission together to saykind of me too, and then the
(16:49):
power of often what is holdingus back or what is in the lead
and driving us to sometimes notbe at our best starts to break,
and we can do that together andso I don't know, I just
encourage people.
The film is really filled with alot of compassion and a lot of
(17:10):
hope.
So you know, the feedback thatwe've had about it has been you
know, there's a lot oftruth-telling and people have
liked that, and sometimestruth-telling can be quite heavy
.
Of truth-telling, and peoplehave liked that, and sometimes
truth-telling can be quite heavy, but held at the same time as
those truths are also um, somuch compassion and so much hope
(17:31):
and so much possibility andit's all in there.
And I just said that's the fullhuman experience.
Like we can't cherry pick justthe good bits and when we try we
just get taken over by the badbits.
Like part of our job is tounderstand what does it mean to
be human?
And it means love and joy andshame and grief and jealousy and
(17:52):
it's all of it.
Like it's all of it for all ofus and it's about welcoming it
and leaning into the hard ratherthan just trying to say, not
those bits, just these ones,because that, like you are to
think that you have, to thinkthat you can control.
(18:15):
That is like the ultimateliable, that none of us are
actually in control of any of it.
In a way, life will happen tous and our job is to welcome it
rather than try and control it.
And so, yeah, I don't know,there's just lots in there.
(18:37):
The doco, yeah, it's just abeautiful story of four parents
who said, uh, who were honestand open and courageous and
vulnerable, and it shows what'spossible and what's on the other
side of doing that.
And I think, you know, thoseare the stories that inspire me
(19:00):
me, and we've put that out inthe world to, I guess, hopefully
inspire others too.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
Yep, that's great.
One of the first things I canremember when I saw it for the
first time and thinking it isconfronting as you dive into
your own experience, as you'rewatching it and thinking about
reflecting on your own life andparenting.
But there was this one line atthe very end.
That was that hope that there'salways hope that you can change
(19:30):
the situation or you can changethe course that you're on.
And yeah, so it is a fantasticdocumentary, very, very well
done.
But it does provide someamazing hope that we can change
the course and find personalgrowth and healing that can
(19:53):
impact our families.
Speaker 2 (19:55):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , yeah, so yeah, yeah, I'm
looking forward to it and alsoalso coming from a local, I
can't get better than that.
So, and um, obviously weappreciate your time, sam, for
coming on the podcast it's sucha late notice.
But also we can promote thecommunity to get people out here
to actually, you know, toactually understand their own
(20:16):
journey, to maybe give them sometips and tricks and to realize
that you know that word hope,but also that we are all just
learning and to be the bestperson we can.
We do have to look afterourselves.
Speaker 3 (20:26):
So I can't wait.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
So Saturday it's all on here at 3 pm at 1 Richmond
Street at Redcliffe.
Can't wait to meet you and Tim.
You'll be here, obviously, tohelp on the ground and welcome
everybody in, and there's a Q&Aas well.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah.
So if people wanted to arrivefrom 2.30 onwards, we're going
to have some food and some.
Yeah, you can register from2.30 onwards.
Screening will start at 3.
Yeah, and then we'll have a Q&Awith Sam and some of the
parents before some food at theend.
So fantastic event tomorrowafternoon.
And if I can just acknowledgeyeah, acknowledge the work of
(21:03):
Uniting Care, some of theRedcliffe team have put this
together, along with some of thepeople from the Redcliffe
Uniting Church and Community Hub, and also thanks to the City of
Bourne Bay for a financialgrant that has made this
possible to be free.
Speaker 2 (21:21):
Yeah, fantastic.
And Sam, I just want to thankyou also for getting Tim on the
podcast.
I've tried for two years butsince you've come along we've
eventually got him on it.
I've got a couple of picturesof him so you can see.
It's actually him across fromme right now.
Bit of a start of something new.
He's a natural.
But, sam, can't wait and loveyour wealth of knowledge, love
how you talk from the heart andeven humble enough to talk about
(21:42):
how it's.
Come from your own beginnings,where you know obviously you've
delved in, yes, to make abusiness out of it, but it's out
of your passion to be a betterparent and also to serve others,
so it's just beautiful.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
So thank you.
Yeah, no worries, thanks forthe chat Look forward to seeing
you tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
Thanks, Gary.
Speaker 3 (21:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:57):
Thanks, Sam.
Popular Podcasts
Fudd Around And Find Out
UConn basketball star Azzi Fudd brings her championship swag to iHeart Women’s Sports with Fudd Around and Find Out, a weekly podcast that takes fans along for the ride as Azzi spends her final year of college trying to reclaim the National Championship and prepare to be a first round WNBA draft pick. Ever wonder what it’s like to be a world-class athlete in the public spotlight while still managing schoolwork, friendships and family time? It’s time to Fudd Around and Find Out!
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!