Sometimes we have podcasts where Luana Anders wants to talk about process or connecting to those we love who are offstage.
In this anniversary edition - we can't tell if it's been 8 or 9 years of us getting together like this, we have a conversation about connecting with loved ones over the holidays.
Needless to say, they're available. They can be conversed with if one wants to. We've spoken about it in the book BACKSTAGE PASS TO THE FLIPSIDE, the idea of "setting a chair aside" for a loved one who is no longer on the planet.
Jennifer recounts how a client of hers lost a loved one recently, and he came through to insist that instead of being sad about his passing that they tell a joke or a story in his honor that will make everyone laugh on Thanksgiving.
I recommend that people speak about them in present tense, and if it's not a tradition, we can make it one where everyone in attendance talks about "what they're grateful for" or "about a person that is no longer on the planet that they'd like to invite to the dinner."
It's a non denominational comment. We don't have to convince anyone that "they're still alive!" but we can suggest that we heard from someone that it's a tradition in Ireland (or Italy, why not?) where on Thanksgiving everyone tells a story about someone who couldn't be there at the dinner.
They can choose whether that person is on the planet or off the planet, but ask them to speak of them in present tense, as if they were at the table and hearing that toast.
Jennifer's father Jim shows up - he's the one who so eloquently offered the idea that "when you can move grief to nostalgia you begin the healing process."
So Thanksgiving is a day of nostalgia, both sad and happy memories of those no longer at the table.
Hope this helps. Happy Thanksgiving!
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