May 16, 2025 • 15 mins
I disappeared for three weeks. What I thought was a minor pulled muscle turned out to be a major medical emergency involving surgery, an at-home IV, and some of the most humbling, humanizing moments of my life.
In this episode, I share the raw story of what happened—and what it taught me about healing, trauma, and the nervous system. We explore how physical injury and medical procedures can leave invisible imprints on the body… and why that matters in our relationships, too.
You'll learn:
- How trauma shows up after surgery or injury
- Why somatic preparation matters before medical events
- The hidden connection between physical healing and attachment
- How to know if you’re carrying unresolved trauma from a past procedure
Whether you've had surgery, cared for someone in recovery, or just needed a reminder that healing is never linear—this episode is for you.
00:00 Introduction and Life Update
01:36 The Unexpected Medical Journey
03:58 Understanding Physical Trauma
05:57 Healing and Relationships
07:18 Somatic and Attachment Therapy
08:34 Recognizing Trauma Signs
11:15 Somatic Preparation for Surgery
13:58 Conclusion and Gratitude
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lisa (00:11):
Hey guys.
Lisa Dawn here, joining you frommy bed.
Whew.
If you've been tuning inregularly, you might be
wondering where I've been forthe past three weeks.
The short version is I've beenhealing.
The long version, well, where doI even begin?
(00:35):
What I thought was a pulledmuscle in my butt turned out to
be a massive abscess that had tobe surgically removed, and that
led to a home iv, multiplerounds of antibiotics and a
humbling few weeks of not beingable to sit.
(00:56):
Being cared for by my incrediblypatient and kind husband and
reckoning with just how tenderand dependent healing can be.
So today's episode is part lifeupdate, part Education on how
Physical injuries and surgeriescan create trauma imprints.
(01:18):
Part relationship reflection,because as someone trained in
somatic experiencing and dynamicattachment re-patterning, I've
come to see how profoundlyphysical trauma intersects with
our relational lives.
So let's get into it.
My butt chronicles.
(01:41):
So, as I said, I thought I hadpulled a glute muscle or
something.
I had just previously done apretty difficult leg workout,
nothing out of the ordinary.
And a few days after I justnoticed that I was feeling extra
sore in my butt, and then I, itwas so tender that I couldn't
(02:07):
even sit on it.
So turns out it was a giantabscess and I had to go in for
emergency surgery, and thehealing journey that followed
was layered.
I was on seven differentantibiotics over the course of
eight days, and at one point Ihad an IV at home, a drainage
(02:28):
tube coming out of my ass.
Yes, I know it's graphic, butreal.
And was unable to sit or lie onmy left side for over three
weeks.
My husband became part-timenurse, wound care specialist and
bathroom assistant.
It was vulnerable.
(02:50):
It was exhausting.
And it reminded me once again,how resilient the body and the
heart really are.
And yo, here's the wild part.
I found out that these types ofinfections are actually super
common.
They can start from something assimple as an ingrown hair, a
(03:12):
blocked gland, or even a tinyinternal tear.
The human body Wow, is just,it's truly mysterious in some
ways.
And what kept me grounded duringthis experience was, well, many
things.
The support I had, the selftrust, my ability to advocate
(03:37):
for my needs.
The capacity and regulation I'vebuilt through the years with my
somatic and relational training,and in our intermediate year, we
learned how to help peopleprepare for and recover from
surgeries and medical traumafrom the pre-op stage through to
(03:57):
healing.
Because here's the thing, traumaisn't just about emotional
events.
The body can hold trauma fromphysical events too, especially
when there's a loss of control,intense pain, or a survival
threat.
If you've ever had a caraccident, a fall, a surgery, or
(04:18):
even a dental procedure, thatleft you feeling off afterward,
it could be a stored trauma inyour nervous system.
And often we don't connect thedots.
I mean, sometimes I can barelyremember what I had for
breakfast yesterday.
So linking anxiety or depressionback to a procedure from a year
(04:39):
ago, it's easy to miss now.
This experience reminded me thathealing, real healing is
relational.
It happens in the quiet moments.
When my husband sat on thebathroom floor to help me when I
let my body rest instead offorcing it, which I'm still
(05:01):
doing, which is why I'mcurrently in bed, was actually
trying to put this episode outfor a few days now.
And what took that, what tookplace of that was, you know, a
three to five hour nap.
Or when I felt the support offriends and family and didn't
(05:21):
push it away, and it alsoreminded me of a hard truth.
So many people had to go throughexperiences like this alone
during a medical crisis, andthat becomes a relational
imprint.
We learn not to trust, not toneed, not to lean on others.
(05:43):
If you've ever had.
An experience like that, I seeyou, and I'm sorry you had to go
through it alone.
It's something we don't talkabout enough.
When the body experiences traumathrough surgery, injury or
(06:03):
sudden medical emergencies, itdoesn't just impact our physical
wellbeing.
I.
It can affect how we show up inrelationships.
Why?
Because attachment and traumaaren't just psychological
concepts.
They're physiologicalexperiences.
When we experience painhelplessness.
(06:26):
Or a loss of control, like underanesthesia or during recovery.
Our survival responses kick in,fight, flight, freeze, collapse,
and often we carry those statesinto our relationships.
Maybe we shut down when someonetries to support us.
Maybe we feel ashamed asking forhelp or being needy.
(06:50):
Perhaps we get overwhelmed bytouch or closeness.
Maybe we overcompensate toappear strong or independent or
avoid vulnerability because itreminds us of powerlessness and
we think I have relationshipissues when really our body is
(07:11):
still trying to protect us froman event that felt really
threatening.
And this is where somaticexperiencing and dynamic
attachment re-patterning becomesso powerful in se.
We work directly with thenervous system to complete
survival responses, restoresafety, and rewire our
(07:35):
relationship to overwhelm.
In Dar, we look at how earlyattachment wounds and their
modern day echoes play out inhow we bond, disconnect and
protect ourselves in love.
And together they offer a wayback, back into the body, back
(07:56):
into connection, back intorelationship.
Not from survival, but fromchoice.
When we heal trauma held in thebody, whether it's from surgery,
an accident, a fall, we make iteasier to trust again, let love
in, receive care without shame,ask for what we need, regulate
(08:21):
with another person because youcan't co-regulate if you can't
locate yourself.
And physical trauma oftendisconnects us from our own
bodies.
So how do you know if your bodyis still holding onto something
from a past medical event?
Well, here are some clues.
(08:43):
So there will be physical signs.
So perhaps there's chronictension in an area long after
it's quote unquote healed.
Maybe you experience numbness ordissociation.
Perhaps there's been shaking,flinching, or freezing with
touch.
Maybe you have overreactions tomedical procedures.
(09:08):
Maybe you have wounds orinflammation that just won't go
away.
So there could be emotionalsigns.
You could be feeling panic orshut down when recalling the
event.
You could be feeling shame aboutbeing weak.
Have difficulty receiving help.
Maybe you avoid doctors ornurses altogether.
(09:33):
Maybe you have flashbacks oranxiety in medical settings, and
there could be cognitivepatterns.
Maybe you say things to yourselflike, I can't trust anyone to
take care of me.
Something bad will happen again,or I'm only safe when I'm in
control.
(09:53):
And I want you to know if any ofthis is resonating, you're not
alone.
So many people are walkingaround with trauma from physical
events that they don't even knoware there.
So situations like emergencysurgeries like the one I had,
childbirth, complications,anesthesia, mishaps, and even
(10:15):
being disbelieved about pain canleave an imprint.
And this is exactly wheresomatic and attachment therapy
can be an incredibly powerfultool to help reestablish safety
in the body, gently renegotiatethe memory of the event,
(10:35):
reconnect with areas that feelnumb or painful, release stored,
fight, flight, or freeze energyand come back into your
wholeness.
So if you're nodding along orthinking of someone who might
need this, please feel free toshare this episode with them.
Again, so many people arewalking around carrying these
(10:57):
invisible weights from physicalinjuries and just don't even
realize it.
And I work one-on-one with folkshealing from all kinds of
trauma, including surgery andaccident recovery.
So if you do need support on mycontact info will be in the show
notes.
Working with your bodysomatically before a surgery or
(11:21):
a medical procedure can make ahuge difference, not just in how
the procedure itself goes, butin how fully and peacefully you
recover afterward.
Here's how and why.
So it prepares your nervoussystem for the boundary rupture.
Surgery is a massive boundaryrupture.
(11:41):
You're being anesthetized cutopen and temporarily losing
control over your body, all ofwhich the nervous system can
perceive as a threat.
Even if the procedure isnecessary and planned.
So, somatic preparation helpsyour system recognize the event
as safe and temporary ratherthan as an overwhelming
(12:02):
violation.
It helps you stay more regulatedduring the procedure.
Even under anesthesia, yournervous system is active.
If you go into a procedure withhigh levels of stress, fear.
Or disconnection.
Your body may store that astrauma.
Even if you're unconsciousduring the event, it reduces
(12:23):
risk of post-surgical PTSD ortrauma imprints.
Many people don't realize thattrauma can come from medical
experiences, especially whenthere's pain, panic or
helplessness, lack of consent orexplanation, anesthesia
awareness, medical gaslighting,or neglect.
So somatic preparation increasesyour system's capacity to
(12:48):
metabolize and integrate theexperience so if it doesn't get
stored, so it doesn't get storedas stuck survival energy, and it
improves healing time.
A regulated nervous system ismore efficient at healing when
your body isn't in a constantstress state, which diverts
energy away from digestion,repair, and immune response
(13:11):
wounds close faster,inflammation is reduced, and
rest is more restorative andstrengthens your sense of agency
and coherence.
Medical procedures often leavepeople feeling passive or
powerless.
But when you go in with asomatic roadmap, you remember,
(13:31):
this is something, this ishappening with me, not just to
me.
I can stay connected to myselfeven in vulnerable moments.
I.
I have choice even in how Ibreathe or orient.
And this embodied agency helpsreduce overwhelm and builds
trust in your body and in thecare process.
(13:55):
Ah.
Thanks for tuning in today.
I know that this one is, isquite short, but I just wanted
to take a moment to thankeveryone who showed up for me
during this time.
The hospital staff, my family,my incredible husband, my
friends who checked in andreminded me I wasn't alone.
(14:19):
And I also want to thank you forbeing here.
And listening.
Whether you've been with mesince episode one or you just
landed here today, we will beback next Wednesday with a full
episode for you.
Until then, may you feel safe inyour body, loved in your
(14:39):
process, and supported in yourhealing, whatever form it's
taking.
With so much gratitude and love.
As always, thank you so much forlistening.
Life is busy, so it means evenmore that you're carving out
time in your day to be here.
Listen, we've got so many greatepisodes coming up, so please
(15:02):
make sure you subscribe tofollow along on Apple Podcasts
or Spotify.
And for those of you who like towatch your podcasts, we are now
uploading them to YouTube.
And if you appreciate theseepisodes, please do us a favor
and leave a rating or a reviewand share it with anyone you
think could benefit.
See you again next Wednesday.
Hey guys.
Lisa Dawn here, joining you frommy bed.
Whew.
If you've been tuning inregularly, you might be
wondering where I've been forthe past three weeks.
The short version is I've beenhealing.
The long version, well, where doI even begin?
(00:35):
What I thought was a pulledmuscle in my butt turned out to
be a massive abscess that had tobe surgically removed, and that
led to a home iv, multiplerounds of antibiotics and a
humbling few weeks of not beingable to sit.
(00:56):
Being cared for by my incrediblypatient and kind husband and
reckoning with just how tenderand dependent healing can be.
So today's episode is part lifeupdate, part Education on how
Physical injuries and surgeriescan create trauma imprints.
(01:18):
Part relationship reflection,because as someone trained in
somatic experiencing and dynamicattachment re-patterning, I've
come to see how profoundlyphysical trauma intersects with
our relational lives.
So let's get into it.
My butt chronicles.
(01:41):
So, as I said, I thought I hadpulled a glute muscle or
something.
I had just previously done apretty difficult leg workout,
nothing out of the ordinary.
And a few days after I justnoticed that I was feeling extra
sore in my butt, and then I, itwas so tender that I couldn't
(02:07):
even sit on it.
So turns out it was a giantabscess and I had to go in for
emergency surgery, and thehealing journey that followed
was layered.
I was on seven differentantibiotics over the course of
eight days, and at one point Ihad an IV at home, a drainage
(02:28):
tube coming out of my ass.
Yes, I know it's graphic, butreal.
And was unable to sit or lie onmy left side for over three
weeks.
My husband became part-timenurse, wound care specialist and
bathroom assistant.
It was vulnerable.
(02:50):
It was exhausting.
And it reminded me once again,how resilient the body and the
heart really are.
And yo, here's the wild part.
I found out that these types ofinfections are actually super
common.
They can start from something assimple as an ingrown hair, a
(03:12):
blocked gland, or even a tinyinternal tear.
The human body Wow, is just,it's truly mysterious in some
ways.
And what kept me grounded duringthis experience was, well, many
things.
The support I had, the selftrust, my ability to advocate
(03:37):
for my needs.
The capacity and regulation I'vebuilt through the years with my
somatic and relational training,and in our intermediate year, we
learned how to help peopleprepare for and recover from
surgeries and medical traumafrom the pre-op stage through to
(03:57):
healing.
Because here's the thing, traumaisn't just about emotional
events.
The body can hold trauma fromphysical events too, especially
when there's a loss of control,intense pain, or a survival
threat.
If you've ever had a caraccident, a fall, a surgery, or
(04:18):
even a dental procedure, thatleft you feeling off afterward,
it could be a stored trauma inyour nervous system.
And often we don't connect thedots.
I mean, sometimes I can barelyremember what I had for
breakfast yesterday.
So linking anxiety or depressionback to a procedure from a year
(04:39):
ago, it's easy to miss now.
This experience reminded me thathealing, real healing is
relational.
It happens in the quiet moments.
When my husband sat on thebathroom floor to help me when I
let my body rest instead offorcing it, which I'm still
(05:01):
doing, which is why I'mcurrently in bed, was actually
trying to put this episode outfor a few days now.
And what took that, what tookplace of that was, you know, a
three to five hour nap.
Or when I felt the support offriends and family and didn't
(05:21):
push it away, and it alsoreminded me of a hard truth.
So many people had to go throughexperiences like this alone
during a medical crisis, andthat becomes a relational
imprint.
We learn not to trust, not toneed, not to lean on others.
(05:43):
If you've ever had.
An experience like that, I seeyou, and I'm sorry you had to go
through it alone.
It's something we don't talkabout enough.
When the body experiences traumathrough surgery, injury or
(06:03):
sudden medical emergencies, itdoesn't just impact our physical
wellbeing.
I.
It can affect how we show up inrelationships.
Why?
Because attachment and traumaaren't just psychological
concepts.
They're physiologicalexperiences.
When we experience painhelplessness.
(06:26):
Or a loss of control, like underanesthesia or during recovery.
Our survival responses kick in,fight, flight, freeze, collapse,
and often we carry those statesinto our relationships.
Maybe we shut down when someonetries to support us.
Maybe we feel ashamed asking forhelp or being needy.
(06:50):
Perhaps we get overwhelmed bytouch or closeness.
Maybe we overcompensate toappear strong or independent or
avoid vulnerability because itreminds us of powerlessness and
we think I have relationshipissues when really our body is
(07:11):
still trying to protect us froman event that felt really
threatening.
And this is where somaticexperiencing and dynamic
attachment re-patterning becomesso powerful in se.
We work directly with thenervous system to complete
survival responses, restoresafety, and rewire our
(07:35):
relationship to overwhelm.
In Dar, we look at how earlyattachment wounds and their
modern day echoes play out inhow we bond, disconnect and
protect ourselves in love.
And together they offer a wayback, back into the body, back
(07:56):
into connection, back intorelationship.
Not from survival, but fromchoice.
When we heal trauma held in thebody, whether it's from surgery,
an accident, a fall, we make iteasier to trust again, let love
in, receive care without shame,ask for what we need, regulate
(08:21):
with another person because youcan't co-regulate if you can't
locate yourself.
And physical trauma oftendisconnects us from our own
bodies.
So how do you know if your bodyis still holding onto something
from a past medical event?
Well, here are some clues.
(08:43):
So there will be physical signs.
So perhaps there's chronictension in an area long after
it's quote unquote healed.
Maybe you experience numbness ordissociation.
Perhaps there's been shaking,flinching, or freezing with
touch.
Maybe you have overreactions tomedical procedures.
(09:08):
Maybe you have wounds orinflammation that just won't go
away.
So there could be emotionalsigns.
You could be feeling panic orshut down when recalling the
event.
You could be feeling shame aboutbeing weak.
Have difficulty receiving help.
Maybe you avoid doctors ornurses altogether.
(09:33):
Maybe you have flashbacks oranxiety in medical settings, and
there could be cognitivepatterns.
Maybe you say things to yourselflike, I can't trust anyone to
take care of me.
Something bad will happen again,or I'm only safe when I'm in
control.
(09:53):
And I want you to know if any ofthis is resonating, you're not
alone.
So many people are walkingaround with trauma from physical
events that they don't even knoware there.
So situations like emergencysurgeries like the one I had,
childbirth, complications,anesthesia, mishaps, and even
(10:15):
being disbelieved about pain canleave an imprint.
And this is exactly wheresomatic and attachment therapy
can be an incredibly powerfultool to help reestablish safety
in the body, gently renegotiatethe memory of the event,
(10:35):
reconnect with areas that feelnumb or painful, release stored,
fight, flight, or freeze energyand come back into your
wholeness.
So if you're nodding along orthinking of someone who might
need this, please feel free toshare this episode with them.
Again, so many people arewalking around carrying these
(10:57):
invisible weights from physicalinjuries and just don't even
realize it.
And I work one-on-one with folkshealing from all kinds of
trauma, including surgery andaccident recovery.
So if you do need support on mycontact info will be in the show
notes.
Working with your bodysomatically before a surgery or
(11:21):
a medical procedure can make ahuge difference, not just in how
the procedure itself goes, butin how fully and peacefully you
recover afterward.
Here's how and why.
So it prepares your nervoussystem for the boundary rupture.
Surgery is a massive boundaryrupture.
(11:41):
You're being anesthetized cutopen and temporarily losing
control over your body, all ofwhich the nervous system can
perceive as a threat.
Even if the procedure isnecessary and planned.
So, somatic preparation helpsyour system recognize the event
as safe and temporary ratherthan as an overwhelming
(12:02):
violation.
It helps you stay more regulatedduring the procedure.
Even under anesthesia, yournervous system is active.
If you go into a procedure withhigh levels of stress, fear.
Or disconnection.
Your body may store that astrauma.
Even if you're unconsciousduring the event, it reduces
(12:23):
risk of post-surgical PTSD ortrauma imprints.
Many people don't realize thattrauma can come from medical
experiences, especially whenthere's pain, panic or
helplessness, lack of consent orexplanation, anesthesia
awareness, medical gaslighting,or neglect.
So somatic preparation increasesyour system's capacity to
(12:48):
metabolize and integrate theexperience so if it doesn't get
stored, so it doesn't get storedas stuck survival energy, and it
improves healing time.
A regulated nervous system ismore efficient at healing when
your body isn't in a constantstress state, which diverts
energy away from digestion,repair, and immune response
(13:11):
wounds close faster,inflammation is reduced, and
rest is more restorative andstrengthens your sense of agency
and coherence.
Medical procedures often leavepeople feeling passive or
powerless.
But when you go in with asomatic roadmap, you remember,
(13:31):
this is something, this ishappening with me, not just to
me.
I can stay connected to myselfeven in vulnerable moments.
I.
I have choice even in how Ibreathe or orient.
And this embodied agency helpsreduce overwhelm and builds
trust in your body and in thecare process.
(13:55):
Ah.
Thanks for tuning in today.
I know that this one is, isquite short, but I just wanted
to take a moment to thankeveryone who showed up for me
during this time.
The hospital staff, my family,my incredible husband, my
friends who checked in andreminded me I wasn't alone.
(14:19):
And I also want to thank you forbeing here.
And listening.
Whether you've been with mesince episode one or you just
landed here today, we will beback next Wednesday with a full
episode for you.
Until then, may you feel safe inyour body, loved in your
(14:39):
process, and supported in yourhealing, whatever form it's
taking.
With so much gratitude and love.
As always, thank you so much forlistening.
Life is busy, so it means evenmore that you're carving out
time in your day to be here.
Listen, we've got so many greatepisodes coming up, so please
(15:02):
make sure you subscribe tofollow along on Apple Podcasts
or Spotify.
And for those of you who like towatch your podcasts, we are now
uploading them to YouTube.
And if you appreciate theseepisodes, please do us a favor
and leave a rating or a reviewand share it with anyone you
think could benefit.
See you again next Wednesday.
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